calvin martin

The EDM DJs as Starbucks workers

deadmau5: begs the boss to add the double double and eventually quits and uses the money to build a Tim Horton’s empire

Dillon Francis: mispells people’s names on the cups on purpose and sneaks alcohol in the drinks

Zedd: actually knows the secret menu by heart

Madeon: switches the bread for baguettes

Skrillex: encourages people to pay it forward in the drive thru

Gareth McGrillen: the guy that yells out your order

Rob Swire: Usually steals coffee beans before he leaves and always gets away with it

Martin Garrix: invents the pizza frappucino

Porter Robinson: brings over Japanese drinks

Nicky Romeo: tried to convince boss to name drinks after football (soccer) stars

Calvin Harris: sneaks protein powder into people’s drinks

10

Best EDM Songs of 2015:

1. “Lean On” by Major Lazer & DJ Snake ft. MO

Blow a kiss, fire a gun / all we need is somebody to lean on.

2. “Omen" by Disclosure ft. Sam Smith

My mind would rule my heart / I didn’t pay attention to the light in the dark.

3. “Fantasy” by Alina Baraz & Galimatias

Say you wanna get so high? / breathe me in like air tonight / listen to the waves / I could be your fantasy. 

4. “How Deep Is Your Love” by Calvin Harris ft. Disciples

How deep is your love? / is it like the ocean? / what devotion are you?

5. “Runaway (You & I)” by Galantis

Anywhere out this place / I wanna run away / just U and I.

6. “Firestone” by Kygo ft. Conrad Sewell

My heart’s alive / Firestones / when they strike / we feel the love.

7. “Sweets (Soda Pop)” by Fox Stevenson

Thats what you gotta do to get a drink of soda / Soda Pop around here?

8. “Rumors” by Pep & Rash

There’s a rumor going ‘round about you / I would like to find out if it’s true / I am free baby, tonight are you?

9. “The Only Way Is Up” by Martin Garrix & Tiesto

The only way is up, baby / for you and me now.

10. “Five More Hours” by Deorro ft. Chris Brown

We found some time / to break each other’s heart, yeah / You said “Don’t look back / and find the road to follow, yeah.”

My reactions to Celebrity Breakups this year.
  • Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris: We're no longer together.
  • Me: Meh. Don't care.
  • Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston: We're no longer an item.
  • Me: Good!
  • Demi Lovato and Wilmer Valderama: We're donezo.
  • Me: Meh.
  • Brangelina: We're so over.
  • Me: kk.
  • Martin Freeman and Amanda Abbington: We've split.
  • Me: OMYGOD?!?!??!!?!
  • Me: NOooOOOOoOOooo PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISN'T TRUE!!!!
  • Me: THIS YEAR IS THE WORST! LOVE IS DEAD!!!
  • Me: Excuse me whILE I GO SOB VIOLENTLY IN A CORNER WHILE CURSING 2016 FOR BEING SO WRETCHED TO ME!
  • Me: URrGgGGHhHhHHhHhHHH :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(