What’s the furthest place from here? It hasn’t been my day for a couple years. What’s a couple more? And if I go, don’t forget the one good thing I almost did. I learned your name without words. I used my eyes, not my hands. What’s the closest you can come to an almost total wreck and still walk away, All limbs intact? And when I go, you’ll be there crying out, begging me. I won’t hear. I’ll just go fast into this night on broken legs. A near miss or a close call? I keep a room at the hospital. I scratch my accidents into the wall. I couldn’t wait to breathe your breath. I cut in line, I bled to death. I got to you, there was nothing left. What’s the meanest you can be to the one you claim to love And still smile to your new found friends? In the same confusing breath, You pull away and draw me in. I wanted you. You wanted more. I built this life and now it’s mine.
Contrary to popular belief, Jane and Darcy are not at the end of a 77 hour no-sleep bender when the incident happens. They aren’t 57, 37, or even 27 hours into a star-gazing-machine-building marathon.
It is, in fact, about ten in the morning. They’ve both had a good night’s sleep. They’ve both had their morning coffee and a decent breakfast. They’ve taken all the necessary safety precautions and double checked - no, triple checked - all the wiring etc.
Barry knew he
wanted to tell Naldo how he felt. In fact. Barry was actually really excited to
tell Naldo. He already knew that Naldo had feelings for him, so there was
nothing to be scared of. Everything would be great.
Barry kept telling himself, anyway. But deep down he knew it wasn’t true. Maybe
things would work out and he and Naldo could be together, and that would be
amazing. But Barry knew that wouldn’t be the end of his problems. He had always
been a bit of a worrier, and he couldn’t help stressing over how other people
would react when they knew the two boys were a couple.
Barry wasn’t popular by any means, he wasn’t actively disliked by his peers.
They were indifferent to him. But that would probably change if they knew Barry
was dating a boy, wouldn’t it? They would look at him differently. They would
judge him. Barry tried not to spend too much time dwelling on what other people
would think of him, but as a high schooler, these things did affect his life a
great deal. He couldn’t just shrug off the feelings like they didn’t matter.
He figured he
should just take things one step at a time, so he didn’t get overwhelmed by the
stress. First things first, he had to tell Naldo how he felt. No more putting
it off. It was time.
So when Barry
woke up the next morning, he rushed to the lab. He wanted to tell Naldo as soon
as possible. He was so ready. It seemed like hours before Naldo finally
arrived, but it was actually probably only a few minutes. Barry was just so
eager to share his feelings that the time seemed to crawl. Barry laughed at
that thought. He couldn’t remember any other time when he has been so excited
to share his feelings. Usually it made him uncomfortable to talk about how he
was feeling. But not now. Not with Naldo.
When Naldo walked
in the door, Barry beamed at him. Naldo immediately smiled back. “You’re in a
good mood,” he commented, heading over to the counter Barry was leaning
“I am.” Barry
held each of Naldo’s hands in his own. “I have something to tell you.”
grew. Was this going where he thought it was going? It had to be, right? Why
else would Barry be holding his hands? Why else would Barry’s eyes be twinkling
like that? This was it, wasn’t it? Naldo’s heart was beating so fast he could
almost hear it.
Barry took a
deep breath. “I love you, Renaldo. More than a friend. More than I ever thought
I could love anybody.” His eyes were filling up with tears, but his smile grew
wider by the word. “I am in love with
you. And I’m sorry it took me so long to see that.”
were also beginning to water. “What changed? A couple days ago you just wanted
to be friends.”
“A couple days
ago I was scared,” Barry admitted. “I didn’t want our friendship to change. I
didn’t want anything to change. You
know I’ve always been afraid of losing you.”
Barry’s cheek and wiped away a tear. “You don’t have to be afraid of that. I’m
not going anywhere.”
Barry’s voice was watery with sobs, but his smile was bigger than ever. “And
I’m so happy.”
Naldo wrapped his arms around Barry and squeezed him tight. “So we’re doing
slightly away from the hug, still loosely clinging onto Naldo. “We’re doing
this.” He held Naldo’s face in his hands and leaned in. This kiss was less
urgent than their first one. It was less out of desperation and more out of
happiness. It was two boys in love, showing that love as deeply as they could. Barry
put everything he had into the kiss, and Naldo gave everything he had in
return. Both boys were still crying, but they had never felt happier.
Naldo pulled back to catch his breath. He looked into Barry’s eyes and saw that
they were now dry. He saw how happy Barry was, and it made him feel incredible.
It was wonderful to know that he could be the cause of that happiness. He never
wanted this feeling to go away. So he leaned back in and kissed Barry again,
this time quickly and sweetly. “Hey,” he whispered, inched from Barry’s lips.
“I love you.”
“I love you,
too,” Barry whispered back, catching Naldo’s lips in his own once more. His
heart was so full, and he felt downright euphoric. He had forgotten everything
he had been worrying about earlier. It didn’t matter what anyone thought or
what they said. All that mattered was that Barry and Naldo were together now.
should tell Cyd and Shelby,” Naldo suggested a few minutes later when the boys
had settled into the booth, both sitting on the same side so they could be as
close as possible.
Even if he was still a little nervous about how people at school would react,
he at least knew that their friends would be thrilled for them. Cyd and Shelby
should be arriving at the lab pretty soon anyway, and now the boys would have
good news to share when they got there.
Cyd greeted when she and Shelby entered the RV about 20 minutes later. Barry
was leaning against the counter, looking like he was trying to appear casual,
and Naldo was sitting on the edge of the booth, his feet rapidly tapping the
ground. “Everything okay?” she asked her friends. She knew about the kiss from
a few days ago, but Naldo had told her the awkwardness had passed. So why were
the boys acting so jittery?
everything’s great,” Naldo beamed. “Better than great, actually. We have some
news.” He stood up and joined Barry by the counter.
Cyd’s hand excitedly. Was this happening? Had Barry finally realized he had
feeling for Naldo? After hearing about the kiss, Shelby had been disappointed
that Barry had insisted the boys just be friends. But she knew that wouldn’t
last. Maybe Barry wasn’t sure how he felt, but it was clear to Shelby and Cyd.
The way he looked at Naldo gave it all away. The boy was in love, whether he
knew it or not.
Shelby’s hand. Had Barry admitted his feelings to Naldo? How great! All that
Cyd wanted was for her friends to be happy, so she had been very upset when
Naldo had told her that Barry didn’t reciprocate his feelings. Cyd had been
sure that Barry was just in denial, but she didn’t tell Naldo, because if she
got his hopes up for nothing she would have felt terrible. But secretly she
hoped Barry would eventually admit to himself and to the others that he loved
Naldo just like Naldo loved him. Had that day already come? Cyd was so pleased.
And the girls
were even more excited when their hunch was confirmed. Barry placed Naldo’s
hand in his own and interlocked their fingers. “Renaldo and I are together
now,” he announced, looking quickly to Naldo and then facing the girls.
Shelby exclaimed, at the same time Cyd burst out, “It’s about time!” The boys
laughed and moved forward to hug their friends, who wrapped their arms around
them in delight.
happy for you!” Cyd said as they all pulled away from the hug. “How did it
it was all Renaldo,” Barry replied. “If he hadn’t kissed me the other day, I’m
afraid I never would have admitted how I felt. I was in such deep denial
because I was so afraid of losing him.”
“But then when
he kissed you, you still didn’t admit how you felt,” Shelby pointed out.
“I know, it
was stupid. I just… I never let myself believe that Naldo could feel that way
about me. So when it happened, I was so shocked.”
“I never let myself think that you would feel the same way about me,”he admitted.
“So I guess we’re
both to blame for how long it took,” Barry offered.
geniuses, you’re both pretty stupid,” Cyd declared.
“I wish I had realized
how I felt sooner,” Barry said. “But you know I’ve never been great at reading
feelings. Even my own.”
Naldo assured him. “It took me a long time to figure out my feelings, too. We’re
just slow on the uptake. But all that matters is that we’re together now.” He
brought Barry’s hand to his lips and placed on a kiss on the boy’s knuckles.
Barry lay his
head on Naldo’s shoulder. He had never felt so content in his life. He couldn’t
believe how lucky he was. He was in love with his best friend, and the feeling
was mutual. They were together now, and they were so happy. Barry never could
have imagined this life for himself when he was younger. But now he had it, and
he was never going to let it go.
I’m so sorry it took my so long to write this chapter! I’ve been a bit busy, but once I got a message today requesting an update, I got to work on it! I hope you like it!
This week on My Life™ I narrowly missed slicing my palm wide open. Basically I needed to cut something so I got one of my mum's big ass kitchen knives so it would be quicker, anyways the knife wasn't cutting the damn thing so here I am literally seconds away from slamming my palm down on the blade cause I thought I needed more strength/pressure or whatever, it was like a slow motion movie sequence I am not kidding, my mum having heard me say the knife wasn't working turns from away from the sink where she's washing the dishes and yells. Turns out I had the knife upside down, so I was trying to cut with the blunt side and about to slam my hand on the very sharp teeth of the cutting side.