by the poet of heart

I Lose Weight As Life Gets Heavier

Things are so hard to lift:
Head
Pen
Spirits
My eyes to meet yours

You look at me with pity
Bring attention to my broken mind
Which I so desperately try to distract

I can laugh when I’m alone
Away from your pity-eyes

I hear you cry because you blame yourself
And I adopt that blame as my own

Please
Just leave me alone

Removed from the perpetual pain of empathy

Sometimes your love for me
Hurts more than anything

do you ever lay in bed and realize how not okay you are
—  (via sturzpoesie IG)
I want to touch you. But not your skin. I want to see your eyes. I want you to look at me as if you’re trying hard to figure out something. I want to see you smile, the kind of smile that you never show to anyone. The kind of smile that reveals who you really are. I want you. The good and the bad. The confuse and sad. The jolly and silly. I want each and every single part of you —from your body to your soul— from your mind to your heart. I want to hold you and break everything that hurts you. Let me see you. Let me pass through that high wall of yours. Please let me, just let me see you. I just want to know that you’re truly happy.
—  ma.c.a // Let me feel you
The worst crying is when you’re lying in bed, with your hand over your mouth so you don’t make noise. The tears are running onto your pillow and your heart’s breaking and you’re thinking of everything that made you cry, and your other hand is on your heart or stomach because they both hurt.
—  (via sturzpoesie IG)

I’m not going to write about all the times you screwed me over.
I’m not going to make you out to be this bad person.
Because at some point you were what was right for me.
You rescued me when I was lost.
You helped me win the battles with my demons.
You made me feel beautiful.
And when you looked at me, I knew I mattered.
Those are the memories I will remember you by
At some point in time, you did love me.

So no, I won’t hate you
For outgrowing me
For lying
For leaving
But I’m not going to pretend I’m ok with it either…

I’m going to push you away,

I need you to stay,

but I wouldn’t blame you if you dont

—  God help me//kayla

Sometimes, we know artists more than we know people in our lives. Especially musicians. Where do you think those lyrics come from? The words of musicians, poets & writers, share things from within their heart and soul that most people don’t have the ability to do. All of those feelings are sent to their brains, then transformed on paper, for the world to see. They choose to share their guts with us. So people can empathize and connect. That is special and generous.

So, yeah, when an artist that we have connected with dies, especially tragically like this, it fucking hurts. We feel helpless. We beat ourselves up with questions that cannot be answered. We go through the stages of mourning just like anyone else who knew them personally, and it is justified.

Don’t put your happiness in other people’s hands
They’ll drop it.
They’ll drop it every time.
—  (via sturzpoesie IG)
That day when you stopped in your tracks just to turn and look at me for one last time, with eyes like the ocean and a smile of the sunset glow, time had stopped existing in that moment. That day, without knowing a single thing, you carried two hearts back home.
—  Lukas W. // You took my heart
and sweetheart,
i promise you
one day
someone will look at you
and see past all of the things
you think make you unlovable
and they will treat you
the way you deserve to be treated
they will be the kind of friend
you’ve always longed to have
they will hold you
as if you are the most precious thing in the world
(and you are)
and they will love you
in spite of your past
i promise
one day
it will happen

but until that day comes
don’t worry so much
about someone else falling in love with you
and focus on falling in love
with the way your chest rises and falls with life
with the way sunlight travels hundreds of thousands of millions of miles just to bring warmth to your day
with the way listening to your favorite song makes you feel as though you’re hearing it for the first time
with the way the stars have aligned in such a way that has made it possible for your life to intertwine with someone else’s
with the way your infectious smile can bring so much joy to others

instead of worrying
about someone else falling in love with you
just remember that it will happen
and focus on falling in love
with yourself first
—  and i guarantee, you aren’t as unlovable as you think you are
(cc, 2017)
Me disculpo mucho por que siento que no hago nada bien y todo es mi culpa.
Depression isn’t always at 3am, sometimes it hits you at 3pm when your with friends and you’re half way through a laugh an suddenly stop
—  (via sturzpoesie IG)
They will tell you how beautiful the fall of the heart may be, but they will never tell you how painful it may turn out to be.
—  Lukas W. // The fall of the heart