by dannie

(A broken coffee machine is sitting on top Mr. Lancer’s desk)

Mr. Lancer: So, who broke it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.

Jazz: I did. I broke i–

Mr. Lancer: No, no you didn’t. Baxter?

Dash: Don’t look at me! Look at Fenton.

Danny: What? I didn’t break it. 

Dash: Huh, that’s weird, how’d you even know it was broken?

Danny: Because it’s sitting right in front of us, and it’s broken.

Dash: Suspicious.

Danny: No, it’s not!

Sam: I-if it matters, probably not, but, Paulina was the last one to use it.

Paulina: Liar, I don’t even drink that crap!

Sam: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Paulina: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles, everyone knows that, Sam!

Jazz: Ok, let’s not fight, I broke it, let me pay for it, Mr. Lancer.

Mr. Lancer: No! Who broke it?

(Pause)

Danny: Mr. Lancer, Tucker’s been awfully quiet.

Tucker: REALLY?!

(Everyone starts arguing, cut to Mr. Lancer standing outside as Mikey records)

Mr. Lancer: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. *looks back into the room, everyone is still arguing* Good, it was getting a little chummy around here.