“I have written a poem for a woman who rides a bus in New York City. She’s a maid, she has two shopping bags. When the bus stops abruptly, she laughs. If the bus stops slowly, she laughs. I thought, ‘Mmm, a-ha.’ Now, if you don’t know black features, you may think she’s laughing. But she wasn’t laughing. She was simply extending her lips and making a sound. I said, ‘Oh, I see.’ That’s that survival apparatus. Now, let me write about that to honor this woman who helps us to survive.” Maya Angelou: And Still I Rise (2016) dir. Rita Coburn & Bob Hercules
Her strengths: This woman is funny, hot, and spontaneous. When you walk into a room with her, everyone stares at you in envy. Neil Strauss, the author of the best-selling dating memoir The Game, puts it simply, “This is the kind of girl everyone wants, and it makes you feel awesome when you’re the one who has her.“
Her weaknesses: "You need enormous confidence to date a woman like this,” Strauss says. “She gets off on attention, but you can’t get jealous.” If you’re independent, you’ll dig her ambition, but make sure she wants you–and not just the ego boost you provide.
The Arty Hipster: PISCES, GEMINI
Her strengths: She knows where all the dive bars are and all the art shows with free wine. She’s exciting and stylish, but not as untouchable as the urban sophisticate. “She actually likes nerds and intellectuals,” says Ian Coburn, author of God Is a Woman: Dating Disasters. And she actually cares about culture. “She can be great for a guy who wants to learn more about art and music,” says Ian Kerner, Ph.D., a relationship therapist and the author of She Comes First.
Her weaknesses: Do you keep going after her because you hope her cool will rub off on you? If your interests don’t match, don’t expect to just coast along on her taste. “Girls like this have opinions,” Kerner says. “And they want you to know the difference between Jonathan Adler and Jonathan Richman.”
The Vegan Yoga Gal: AQUARIUS, LIBRA
Her strengths: She’s got great skin and a long neck, and she gives you long back rubs with wacky oils. All that deep breathing means she rarely flies off the handle, and you value this perhaps even more than you value her amazing, high, tight rear, which is saying a lot. Strauss says, “This is a woman who really wants to make a deep connection with life, and a man who wants the same could be really into her.” Fisher says that independent, analytical, or creative guys could find her alternative view fascinating.
Her weaknesses: Remember, Strauss notes, “These women are almost exclusively interested in men who are into the same stuff they are.” Love her, love her lifestyle.
The Alpha Female: VIRGO, ARIES
Her strengths: She graduated from college in 3 years and went right to law school without taking a vacation. She’s hard to keep up with. Ironically, it’s not the alpha dog who should try dating her. “A scientist, artist, or teacher will do well with this woman,” says April Masini, author of Date Out of Your League. “If you’re not interested in power plays, she won’t fight you."
Her weaknesses: She has a lot in common with alpha males, but these relationships are too intense. "They can’t make time for each other,” Fisher says. Coburn cautions that pushover types are often attracted to such women, and some alpha females – the sadistic ones – are attracted right back. “Obviously, if this is your dynamic, it isn’t good.”
The Intimacy Junkie: CAPRICORN, SCORPIO
Her strengths: She goes to yoga, too, but it’s the easy kind that’s more about “connection to the self” than sculpting a smoking bod. So what if she’s a little in your face. The sex is amazing. Strauss likes women like this. “She is the best kisser in the world. Very intense, very into connecting.” Fisher says independent men will love such a deeply verbal gal, and Kerner thinks all men should date someone like this. “Most men need help learning to communicate, and she will help them."
Her weaknesses: The intimacy junkie makes you feel great at first. She’s so into you and your feelings. Analytical men will find themselves easily ensnared in her macramé web. "He will be super into her at first, but there’s going to be a lot of talk about the ‘meaning’ of the relationship, which might cause it to implode,” Fisher says.
The Happy Homemaker: CANCER, TAURUS
Her strengths: She’s no gold digger – all she wants is a Volvo wagon and a nice, cozy three-bedroom. She wants to have your kids, take care of them, and take care of you. “Some guys draw a great deal of ego satisfaction from providing for a family, and there is nothing wrong with that,” says Masini. A man who grew up in a very traditional household will love her, and, conversely, a guy who grew up with domestic chaos craves this woman for the stable home she provides.
Her weaknesses: Remember that when she says she’s not going to work, she means it. Career-minded men could be happy with an arrangement that allows them to focus on their work while she manages his domestic life. But if the financial stress builds, you may not be able to convince her to get a job.