by bee walker

tfc as conversations between me and @ursofuckingclassy
  • Allison: Where's the FUCKING confetti emoji?? oh. there it is.
  • Nicky: bouta try to watch shadowhunters with the netflix app on my phone. like a goddamned caveman.
  • Renee: Well. That was perhaps the most unsatisfactory conclusion to any series I have ever read. And I read the Harry Potter epilogue.
  • Dan: SHE ISN'T EVEN CUTE. IS SHE WORTH SHUTTING UR FRENZ OUT? I DON'T THINK SO.
  • Matt: I was about to say "next I would listen to..." but then I would've listed like ten songs, so.
  • Seth: BUT YEAH. I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE IT. SO IDK.
  • Aaron: wow thanks for that, i feel so goddamn validated now.
  • Andrew: my own mother. you come into MY HOUSE and start making statements like that? no.
  • Neil: exactly. like...tonight i have a lab due for my horticulture class and i'm like.....naaaaah...not gonna.
  • Kevin: pal, idk if you've met me, but my body composition is 50% complaint, 25% anxiety, 15% self-deprecation, and 10% depression.
  • Wymack: get some manners ya HEATHENS
  • Abby: Do I need to ship you some sedatives?
  • Bee: he looks right at me out of nowhere and goes, "i know your soft spot"
  • Jean: you think i WANT to like things that hurt me? that piss me off? no. it's a curse.
  • Jeremy: Can we just take a second to appreciate how good you're doing at finding the bright side rn? who even are you?
  • Riko: greedy fuckers
April Fools!
  • Matt and Dan blow up ALL the balloons, then strategically leave them in places.
    • They hide Kevin’s racquet in the equipment closet, which is full of balloons 
    • They get Nicky in on it, he unlocks the Maserati for them to completely fill it to the brim in pink and red balloons
  • Aaron tapes air horns behind all the doors, so when someone opens a door all the way it goes off
  • Renee and Allison peel onions and dip them in caramel and hand them out. No one suspects it. It’s beautiful when Matt just tears into one and starts chewing in earnest. Caramel apples are his fav
  • Kevin cancels practice 
    • Wymack’s in on it
    • The Foxes still show up like the nerds they are 
  • Wymack and Abby sit on a few swivel chairs that have air horns under them
    • Wymack almost had a heart attack
    • Abby was up and ready to fight as soon as hers went off
    • No one fesses to putting them there
    • (It was Bee) 
  • Nicky changed all the contacts in Neil’s phone to “Andrew” 
  • Aaron got Neil to grab Andrew’s pack and replaced his cigarettes with candy cigarettes 
    • Andrew just pulls out another pack
    • Not before trying to light a stick of sugar 
      • Aaron’s howling 
      • Neil’s grinning 
    • He’s a sucker for candy anyway, it’s not like he’s not complaining 
  • Dan bakes cupcakes
    • And frosts them with mayonnaise mixed with red food coloring
    • Nicky you idiot. 
  • Neil doesn’t get the point! 
    • Neither does Andrew
    • Doesn’t stop either of them from replacing all the cream in 2 packs of Oreos with toothpaste 
    • Nicky shoved 3 in his mouth when Neil offered 
    • Instant regret thy name is Nicky Hemmick

Okay but like imagine ten years after TKM.

  • And Neil is still a really big star.
  • Everyone loves him and he gets hit on all the time
  • Because let’s be honest Neil is a cutie.
  • Then after one game Andrew is watching Neil get harassed by fans.
  • Andrew being Andrew is a possessive shit so when someone touches Neil’s arm he wants to flip out
  • But he doesn’t
  • But the next morning he wakes Neil up with a bag of clothes.
  • Neil tries to look inside
  • “No peeking.”
  • Andrew tells Neil they are going out.
  • Neil follows Andrew with the clothes.
  • Tries to ask why.
  • Andrew tells him to stop asking questions.
  • They drive to the nearest registry office
  • Andrew tells Neil to get changed.
  • Neil has to try put a suit on inside the car because Andrew.
  • Neil is still confused.
  • Especially when Bee and Renee are inside.
  • Neil almost runs when it turns out they are getting married.
  • Andrew turns to him and is just like ‘Yes or No’
  • Neil reminds him it’s always a yes.
  • They get married.
  • Renee takes a picture and puts it online
  • Internet explodes
  • As does Neil’s phone
  • V. angry texts from Nicky, Matt and Dan.
  • He’s busy so he doesn’t reply.

Yeah my first headcanon but I can imagine it so clearly. So I thought I’d try….

Wonderful Boys of Musicals (plus commentary)

Michael Mell
(Okay yeah I can see that. He’s nice and adorable and just wanted Jeremy to be happy while being his friend and safe. Overall 100/10)
Leaf Coneybear
(Self esteem issues and a verbally abusive family who makes him feel like an idiot. Makes it pretty far in a spelling bee as a person who only got in because the winner had their bar mitzvah that day and the runner up had to go to the bar mitzvah. He is nice to his competitors and is willing to make funny noises 99/10)
John and Christian
(We don’t see them much in the soundtrack, just one song where they sing as kids. 9/10)
Archie
(A boy with an illness that makes him the “freak of the school” along with Patrice. He does things for Evan Goldman because he wants a date with Kendra, he does threaten to ruin Evan’s life but makes it up by making Evan’s life better. His name is legit Archie Walker and he needs crutches. 99/10)
Jim Pomatter
(he helps deliver a baby, cheats on his wife with a pregnant woman (Jenna), and sings songs making Jenna feel like she matters. His name has the word “matter” in it! I give him an 8/10)
Jared Kleinman
Look he was a dick to Evan but he had social issues unresolved. He also wanted to make everything gay so he’s like 99.9% of tumblr, and he also wanted to be part of their fake friendship but Evan wouldn’t let him. (10/10)
JD
(m why is he on here (because I like him) okay so… Homicidal maniac. Um… Likes slushies? Killed a lot of people (10000000/10) NO! NO! 6/10)