(Y/N) sat in the pristine bed motionless. Her pale blue eyes covered by her eye lids. Her thin hair spread out around her as she napped, like usual. The steady beeping of the machines surrounding her regulated her shallow breaths.
A gentle knock at the door woke her and she sat up, putting the pillow behind her to lean on. She wiggled the breathing tube in her nose, and smoothed her hair. “Come in.” She said in a hoarse voice.
Her mother opened the door, with a wide smile on her face. (Y/N) cocked an eyebrow. That was odd. Ever since she’d gotten sick her mother had a sour expression. She missed the good old days, when they would go horse back riding together. But, she had been sick for a good two years now and they had to pay the bills somehow. So they sold the horses. She was eight teen now, and it was actually her nineteenth birthday. Horray.
“Dear, you’ll never believe it.” Her mother said with a giggle.
“What? Why are you so happy? You know I hate suprises.” She said, looking up at her mother who was rubbing her forehead with her thumb.
“Oh just wait. You can come in now.” Her mother called into the hallway. (Y/N) turned her head to look at the door, sitting up some more. She closed her eyes as she felt a small pain in her head, but did her best to ride through it, squeezing her eyes shut as she winced.
She nearly jumped out of the bed when she opened them. There, at the end of the bed, stood a tall figure. She felt her heart stop at the sight of him. That gorgeous black hair, the sparkling blue eyes, those gorgeous cheekbones.
The machine beeped rapidly. Her mother squeezed her hand, bringing (Y/N) back to reality as she regulated her heartbeat.
“Am I already dead?” She asked, cocking her head. But the chuckle from the not so strange visitor and the shake of his head said this was real.
“Make a wish came true honey.” Her mom told her, tears coming from her own eyes.
“No way…” (Y/N) gasped, covering her mouth.
“Im andy.” He finally said, holding out a strong hand.
“Im (Y/N) (L/N)” the girl said, still in awe as she looked up at him. She shook his strong, muscular hand with her own dainty, pale sickly one.
“Sorry the guys could come, busy.” He told her, smiling nervously as if he was scared to hurt her feelings. He sat on the end of the bed, smiling at her.
“No no its ok. I understand.” She said quickly in response.
“Ill give you two some time to talk.” Said her still giggling mother before walking out the door quickly, in a fit of smiles and laughter.
“So your sick.” Andy said gently, squeezing your foot which was under a blanket.
“Yeah. I have a tumor in my skull.” (Y/N) replied, in an accepting voice. It was amazing she wasn’t so bitter.
“That sucks. But I know you’ll make it through. Strong people find a way, and you seem very strong.” He told her, still holding her small foot. “And happy birthday.” He said, reaching into his pocket and pulling something out. A piece of black and white fabric, he held it out to her.
“Whats this?” She asked, taking it and looking at it. A fingerless glove with a skeleton hand painted on it. The smooth surface felt worn. His own glove she’d seen him preform in many times from her laptop. He had signed the palm. “No way.” She said, pulling it on. It fit like a glove, ironically.
“It’s the least I could do. I think your great really, and the guys told me to give you this.” He told her, reaching into his vests pocket and pulling out a chain with the bvb symbol on the end. “For luck.” He told her with a grin, putting it on her neck.
“I wish I could stay longer, but ive got to get back.” He told her in a genuinley sad voice.
“Its ok, I totally understand. Ill watch the show on youtube. “(Y/N) Promised with a week smile.
“Fight for us, ok?” He asked, poking the necklace.
“Ill do my best.” She told him with a nod. He stood up, leaning down and enveloping her in a strong hug. His hands lingered on her shoulders as he smiled down at her, before turning and walking out. She could hear him sniffling and saw a tear fall from his face as he did his best to collect himself.
I couldn’t believe it. This lovely, beautiful, wonderful girl, was dying. I wished I had super powers so I could save her. I felt a tear well up in my eye as I gave her the necklace, but I shoved it back down along with my heart which was now in my throat. I needed to be strong for her.
As I turned around, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. A tear flowwed down my cheek and I sniffled, trying to suck it back in but it was immposible. I walked out, saying my goodbyes. I jogged past the mother cutting off her thanks.
As soon as I got to my car I broke down. It was so hard.. That poor girl, so young, so full of potential. Dying. I slammed my fist on the steering wheel, cursing the lords name as I wondered if she actualy could make it through the operation I was told was taking place in a few short weeks. I turned on the radio, and Creep by Radio Head was soon blasting as I screached out of the parking lot.
As I pulled into the apartment building, I slammed my car door, jogging upstairs and into the makeshift studio. I sat down on one of the plastic chairs, still crying lightly as I wrote lyrics down. They flowed from my brain as I thought of the girl, laying all alone in that bed, knowing she was going to (most likely) die.
Now our lives have changed, I wish that I could heal Time has taken love, a darker side revealed For every lie begins, with what we used to feel
I scrambled down on a piece of crumbled up lined paper. I heard juliet enter the house and I slammed the door, locking it behind me. She would ruin my flow if she disturbed me now.
Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain All of your tears, everything’s gone, is it too late? Walk away!
A lonely heart remains until we know the truth But if it stays the same, can we make it through? A life without the hurt, a life without you
Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain All of your tears, everything’s gone, is it too late? Walk away!
Everything’s gone, everything’s gone Blaming myself, tied to these chains, living in pain
All of your tears, everything’s gone, is it too late? Walk away! Walk away (everything’s gone) Walk away (everything’s gone) Walk away A life without you, everything’s gone A life without you, everything’s gone
I sighed, leaning back and rubbing my red eyes. I folded the paper, tucking it in my jacket pocket for later.
3 months later
(Y/N) yawned as she drove the car through the city. The crowded streets were packed with people with black painted faces and black clothes. She grinned, knowng she looked much like them also. She was wearing black, high waisted shorts, black dr. martins, and a faded purple crop top. She had on black lipstick, and eyeliner. Her straight black hair, parted in the middle, landed just below her breasts. It was thick and black now, much different then the thin brown hair she’d had just 3months earlier.
She pulled the car into the parking lot of the venue, locking it and running to the door and entering. She was very early, and the doors had just opened, she pushed past the crowding people, handing her ticket to the booth director. He nodded motioning her in. She found her place below the stage, directly in the middle where she would have plenty of room.
The place was booming within hours, the opening band was finishing up. (Y/N) grinned as they left the stage. Bvb came onto the stage, grinning wildly as CC took his place at the drums, and jinxx, jake, and ashley on the stage itself.
Andy came out last, bouncing up and down as the band begun the opening to Devil in the Mirror.
“We are created the suffering ones. Condemned by the dying, We sing out in tongues. Caught in obsession with all that we love.Never look forward, just straight down the gun!” Andy shouted into the microphone. He ran down the stage, running his hands along the fans.
“The Devil in the mirror! Screaming that my heart is flawed. I’m never gonna let you win. No I will not surrender, Even if I start to fall. I swear to you I’ll rise again!” He sung. (Y/N) stuck out her gloved hand far, making sure he would touch it. As his fingers ran along the smooth leather glove he did a double take. He looked down at her hand, recognizing the glove instantly. As their eyes met he nearly fell backward. He was now grinning wildly, and put his heart into the song.
He squated down infront of her, holding on the hand and squeezing gently. Some fans screamed with jealousy while others ‘awed.’
“Cast the illusions of hatred and pride Take the communion in faith they provide I’m just a human not ready to die My voice is a weapon, my fear is a lie
I can’t take it anymore Everyday feels like a war
The Devil in the mirror Screaming that my heart is flawed I’m never gonna let you win No I will not surrender, Even if I start to fall I swear to you I’ll rise again.” He finished, holding her hand the entire time. Finally he let go, and walked over to Ashley, whispering in his ear. Ashley nodded, and said some singnal to the other guys.
Soon, jinxx was seated at a piano, starting the music to her all time favorite song. Walk away. Andys deep voice began the song.
“Now our lives have changed, I wish that I could heal Time has taken love, a darker side revealed For every lie begins, with what we used to feel.” He sung in that beautiful voice, making eye contact with her multiple times. Every time she heard this song she felt her heart rumble as if it were somehow connected to her. She really doubted it though.
As the song finished, tears were streaming down both their faces. She wiped her nose, laughing nervously as he bent down, whispering something in the guards ear.
The concert went on, and they sung Rebel love song, Faithless, I am bullet proof, and fallen angels. When they finished and Andy was making his closing speech, the guard took her arm gently and smiled at her. She smiled back, following him backstage. She was led to Andy’s dressing room, where she was left all alone to wait. She sat down on a bar stool, running her hands through her hair nervously as she waited for whatever he was planning.
I ran along the stage, slapping hands quickly. I wasn’t about to linger, not since being pulled in and being trambled on once. Not fun. I felt my hand brush smooth leather material, almost too familiar. I looked down at the hand and I saw my glove. What was it doing here? Id given it to that girl and she was most likely dead. I looked at the face of the person, and I nearly fell over with surprise. There she was! It was the girl id met in the hispital. She looked amazing. I could hardly believe it.
I held onto her hand as long as I could, squeazing it with disbeleif. Only months ago this hand had been pale, week, and freezing cold. Now it was filled with life and vigor as she stood their dancing. By the end of the song I had to stand up from cramping my legs. I smiled widly, and whispered in Ashley’s ear while keeping one eye on her. I had to make sure this wasn’t a dream.
“Lets play Walk away.” I told him.
“You got it.” Ashley grinned, signaling the song of choice to the guys. Jinxx hopped on the piano, instantly picking up the tune. I smiled at her, feeling a rush in my heart. Did she know this song was for her? What if I let it slip in an interview? No, I would have remembered that.
I began to sing the lyrics, my mind rushing with each word. As soon as we finished the slow, beautiful song, I bent down, telling the stage guard to take her to my dressing room. I could wait to talk to her.
END OF PART 1.
(OOC: ok sooo this was really fun to write. I tried not to rush so its kind of long. I hope you can bear through it haha!)
Can you write an Andy Biersack imagine where you ‘hate’ each other but are secretly crushing on one another? My name is Julia. Thank you!!
ME: I changed the little secret thing in a way… And I don’t like using names in imagines… I think I’ve done the name thing once but never again… I want everyone to enjoy my imagines!!!
I was looking at Andy on the couch playing batman on his phone. What a dork. I was only there because I was their merch girl and I needed the money.
“Dude what the hell are you looking at?!” Andy exclaimed and I snapped out my trance.
“Shut up! I’m still trying to figure out.” I said back with attitude and Andy rolled his eyes.
“Ya know what…” Andy began.
“Whoa hey!!! Save the arguing for later you guys.” Ashley said walking in between us stopping the tiny argument.
“Yeah no matter how entertaining it is. We have a show to play and you have shirts to sale. So come on.” CC said drinking the rest of whatever was in his cup and we all headed out the tour bus.
DURING THE SHOW…
Hearing the same old songs I heard for the last few days was getting pretty boring.
I was selling shirts and all kinds of other merchandise. Just sitting in the background at the merch table with Kristine. From where we were, we could never see the show, just hear the music.
“Hello?!” I was snapped out my little boring daydreaming. I saw a fan looking at me stupidly.
“Oh yea sorry sweety… What can I get you?” I asked nicely and she nodded.
“Yes I’d like that shirt.” She said pointing out a black shirt that had a BVB symbol on it.
“Here you go.” I said giving her the change.
“Y/N Joey showed up… You can take the rest of the show off.” Kristina said and I smiled. This rarely happened which gave me time to watch the show.
I walked to the side of the stage and watched the band. That made me smile. I loved watching them have fun onstage.
It kinda made touring with this band worth it.
All of a sudden my attention was on Andy. I watched as he moved around on the stage singing and having fun. He looked hot.
Did I just think that? Oh no… Oh no no no… This can’t be happening… Do I like Andy?!
ON THE BUS…
“Y/N what happened to you? We missed you at the after party.” Jinxx said as the rest of the band entered the bus.
“I just wasn’t feeling it.. Ya know?” I replied. I watched as Andy walked in. Dammit Y/N you must NOT like him. Chill out!
“Man forget about her. She’s a party pooper. She would’ve killed our vibes anyway.” Andy said rudely and I didn’t sweat him.
Andy sat next to me and went on his phone. I wasn’t really one to go to sleep so I did the same.
As time went on the entire bus was asleep except for Andy and I.
“When are you going to sleep loser?” Andy said to me without looking up from his phone.
“Does it matter? Since when did you keep tags on my life schedule?” I asked with a sly grin.
“I don’t know… Since when did you start looking at me like that at shows?” Andy said with a chuckle. My cheeks lit up.
He got me on that one.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I said trying to act like I was still focused on my phone.
“Bullshit. You were starring at me like a piece of cake.” Andy said finally looking at me.
I didn’t say anything, I just looked at my phone.
“Oh yeah… You could stop playing as if you’re on your phone. You’ve been scrolling down at nothing.” Andy laughed and sighed.
“Damn you Andy you’re such a dick. I hate you… But I like you. I’m confused.” I said putting my face in my hands.
Andy’s laughter filled my ears.
“Aye I’m pretty damn hot. It’s not like you’re the only one… It was just a matter of time.” Andy laughed cockily.
“Fuck you.” I said loudly with a giggle.
“Aww don’t feel SOO bad. I kinda like you too. No matter how lame and irritating you could be.” Andy said and I laughed a little.
“Smooth Biersack… REAL smooth. I’m going to bed. See you in the morning. Asshole.” I said standing up.
“Yeah whatever dumbass.” He replied and I realized this was how our ‘relationship’ was going to be. I kinda liked it that way.
My own… Hate/Love relationship with Andy Biersack. I can really get used to this…
The BVB tour bus pulls up in front of your house honking twice you run to your window as Andy steps out of the bus pulling on his prophet vest, putting on his sun glasses he looks up at your room window like he always does. You two have such a soft spot for each other but your bro doesn’t know.
“Jerr! The bus is here.” You grab your bag throwing it over your shoulder locking your door as you exit. Meeting up with Jeremy in the hall way.
“Reddy to go Y/N?” he smiles you toss him your bag
“Yup, Carry this for me yea?” the bell rings you hear you mom open the door
“Hi Mrs. Ferguson can Jinxx and Y/N come out and play?”
“Hello Andrew. They’re up stairs.” He walks in hugging your mom running up the stairs almost running into you, pushing back his hair holding on to the back of his neck
“Uh hey Y/N h-hows it going?” he flashes a smile lifting up his sunglasses flashing you those perfect blue eyes.
“H-hey Andy.” You hug him and he pulls you to him. You hear steps behind you and you pull back quickly and Andy fidgets with his hair again you hear the steps behind you get closer and stop, Andy’s eyes get huge for a quick second
“Sup Jinxx! *he stammers, low five, high five* hows it going man? Ready for tour” Jinxx looks at you guys funny for a few seconds
“Yea man haha…. Carry this for me yea?” he throws yours and his bags at him he catches them as Jinxx slaps his back you cover your mouth covering your laugh, he looks at you he winks and heads down stairs you lean back against the wall
“Y/N!! You coming?”
“yea I’m coming!” you run down the stairs hugging you mom kissing your dad on the cheek as you run out to the bus Andy holds the door open for you, you run past him poking his tummy. You run in sitting next to CC as Andy walks in looking at you
“So who’s ready to start this tour!!” the bus goes crazy as it pulls out from in front of your house.
“So Y/N *You look up at CC whose talking without taking his eyes of his game* Jinxxy didn’t wanna leave his baby sister home all alone? Awe too cute *he pinches your cheek* little Y/N can’t be home alone” you glare at him snapping as he tries to pinch your cheek again
“Fucking piranha! Jinxx! Y/N tried to bite me!!” he laughs
“Well don’t touch her face then.” You giggle high fiving Jinxx.
“So where we headed first? *They ignore you doing their own things* HALLOO! EARTH TO YOU GUYS?!” Andy looks up at you
“What?” he smiles slightly
“Where are we headed first?” you say with a slightly irritated tone. He giggles lowly looking back at you again he looks around real quick to see if anyone is looking at you two, he sees no one is so he winks at you. You giggle looking down at your hands in your lap Andy looks over at Jinxx.
“Aye man where did you say your parents were going?” Jinxx looks at him face full of chips trying to chew.
“Vegas!” He says with food falling from his mouth
“That’s cool hahaha long way to gamble?” Andy giggles still looking at you
“They’re going on a couples retreat for like 2 weeks… its stupid haha” Andy walks up behind him patting his back
“So that’s why we brought shrimpett along? Hahaha” you glare at him flipping him off he grabs it out of the air kisses it and puts in his pocket.
“You’re so stupid.” You mouth at him he winks at you again as the bus pushes down the high way you put your head phones in and stare out the window it looks like a storm is coming in you pull out your head phones walking up to the bus driver.
“Hey? Uhmm is there a storm coming or is it just a passing through kinda thing?” you ask hopeful that it’s just a pass through.
“Nope we’ll be driving all night so eventually well get to the middle of it so we’ll see it from the drizzle all the way to the end. *Your eyes grow huge* Are you all right in a storm?” you shake your head no your stomach turning
“Just sit back and relax sweetheart it won’t be that bad maybe you’ll fall asleep before it hits to bad.” He one arm hugs you as you smile slightly.
You go and sit down, putting in your head phones hugging your knees looking out the window as the black storm clouds slowly make their way over the high way casting a dark tint over the bus.
You hug your knees tighter looking around the bus the guys are all asleep except Andy you can hear him arguing with Juliet. He does that a lot he seems so unhappy sometimes, you don’t really know Juliet but you have heard them argue and she doesn’t seem too nice.
“Alright Jules alright! *Muffled screaming* well then maybe we need to take a break, you know go separate ways for a bit…. Maybe? *SCREAMING* don’t bring her into this she has nothing to do with it! She’s here because Jeremy doesn’t want her home alone for 2 weeks and it really doesn’t fucking matter how the fuck I feel about her what matters is that I’m not happy with you, I’m done, we’re done, we’re not taking a break, we are not still gonna be friends, we are done Juliet DONE!”
You throw your head phones back in as the farthest door opens its Andy’s bunk you can hear him snivel, he’s crying.
“God! I just grrrr fucking bitch!!! *he kicks the cabinet under the sink he rests his elbows on the sink and his face in his hands he’s crying still* what am I doing?!” you get up quietly and stand behind him you can hear him crying into his hands your heart shatters as he weeps.
“*touching his back softly* Andy?” You feel his whole body tense as the sound of your voice hits his ear
“*wiping his eyes before he turns to face you* Y/N uhmm hey whats up.” You hold out your arms, he just crumbles wrapping you in his arms sobbing into your neck you rub his head stroking his hair and patting his back.
“Are you okay love?” you say softly as he cries
“I hate this. You shouldn’t be holding me I should be holding you.” you both laugh as he rubs his eyes clear
“What are friends for if you can’t cry on their shoulders?” he giggles slightly pulling you into a tight hug kissing your forehead.
“Thank you Y/N you’ve always been there for me and I want you to know I will always be here for you.” He’s looking deep into your eyes and you two lock gazes. Your eyes grow huge as a huge flash of lightning lights the bus Andy grabs ahold of your hand rubbing your thumb with his. Looking at you slightly confused.
“Do you not like storms Y/N?” he pulls you too him wrapping his arms around your waist you lay your head against his chest as you answer.
“No not really. Kinda deathly afraid of storms actually.” You wrap your arms around him tightening your hug with each flash of lightening
“Come on lets go to bed you can bunk with me instead of sleeping on the couch *long awkward pause* I-I mean if you want to you’re welcome to.” You giggle softly as he pushes his nose into your hair softly breathing in your sent as he kisses your ear. You take his hand and he leads you to his bunk. He gives you one of his old band shirts to sleep in he leaves the room so you can change *Knock Knock*
“You decent?” you laugh as he walks in you begin to pull up your hair revealing a small neck tattoo it’s the BVB symbol just to the left of your right ear.
“Is that a Tattoo?” you cover it with your hand not remembering you had it your eyes bug out and he can see your face in the mirror he laughs.
“Y/N do you think I really care about tattoos? *Holding out his arms* no I don’t think so! Can I see it?” you shyly move your hand out of the way as he walks toward you. He rubs it with his thumb and then lightly kisses it wrapping his arms around your waist
“I Love your BVB Tattoo!” you turn around looking at him that smile gracing his face and those perfect blue eyes staring into your soul. He leans in, you turn away quickly he catches the hint backing up
“You ready for bed?” he lays down first watching you brush your teeth. You lay down next to him laying your head on his chest he wraps his arms around you covering your ears form the now very loud window shaking thunder. You fall asleep in his arms as he whispers sweet nothing in your ear.
*Time Laps 11:00AM*
You and Andy are asleep still. *Knock Knock* you’re half-awake when you hear the door open.
“What the Hell! Y/N what the fuck are you doing in here!” Jeremy starts yelling, you sit up quickly smacking your forehead on the top of Andy’s bunk grabbing your forehead
“Ow Shit! What the fuck?!” your kinda mad but quickly realize you’re in bed with Andy with no pants and your brother just walked in. he pulls you up by your arm. Andy is awake staring at the ceiling.
“Dude Andy what the literal fuck! My little sister man! Like really what the hell! *turning looking at you* why the hell don’t you have fucking pants on! What the hell happened! Andy What the shit!!” Jeremy’s really mad you try and reach out to him
“Jer I *putting your hand on his back, he shrugs it off violently*
“No Y/N get dressed! Now! You’re going to grandmas! TODAY!” your eyes start to water and Andy springs up out of bed.
“Jinxx it wasn’t her I swear I offered her to sleep here I’m sorry I- I can’t even begin to know how your feeling but I’m not going to apologize for liking her. You’ve had to know Jer there’s no way you didn’t notice!”
“Y/N Leave now!”
“No” you stand your ground. He turns to you his eyes locked on yours.
“Jeremy… I like him too! And I won’t apologize for it either.” Jinxx storms out slamming the door behind him
“Stop the bus Al!” the bus comes to a stop and you look out the window and Jeremy is walking off toward the back of the bus pulling out a pack of cigarettes. Andy pulls you too him rubbing your hair
“I’m gonna go talk to him.”
“No! Andy what if he gets crazy?” you look up at him.
“Then he gets crazy I’m not gonna let him come between us Y/N he’ll get over it. We’re best friends and band mates he can’t hate me forever!” he chuckles unsure of himself
*Time Laps 45 Min*
Andy walks in with a busted lip and a big ol smile.
“Whelp he doesn’t hate me! And this *pointing to his lip* means we’re clear about last night and I’m allowed to do this.” He leans in and kisses you
“Y/N will you be my girlfriend?” he smiles and you wrap him in a hug
“Yes! A Million Times YES!”
Jinxx eventually gets over it and you and Andy date for 2 years before he asks you to marry him, 3 months after you become pregnant with a baby boy you name Landon Elliot.
sorry this took so long -_- I’m still not fully better but i felt well enough to finish this one!!! i hope you guys like it <3
There’s been a lot of speculation as of late regarding the recently released music video and overall meaning behind Black Veil Bride’s song Goodbye Agony. Below I will be breaking down both the song and the video, but please keep in mind that these are my observations and opinions-I am NOT affiliated with BVB in any way, shape or form.
Heaven’s gone, the battle’s won I had to say goodbye Lived and learned from every fable Written by your mind And I wonder how to move on From all I had inside Place my cards upon the table In blood I draw the line I’ve given all my pride
The very first line of this song speaks of Heaven-well BVB often talk of Heaven, especially in their hit song from their second album, Fallen Angels. The battle-possibly speaking of the battle between F.E.A.R and the Wild Ones. Andy had spoken in a few interviews about how some of the songs on this album will allude to the previous record. Watching the video, the first few frames land on a spider in a jar labeled Golgotha. Golgotha is a place believed to be right outside of Jerusalem, where Jesus was crucified. It also has a Latin meaning, which when reversed translated means “Calvary”. The BVB fan base has always been considered an Army-a Calvary to the band itself.
Watching the video further, we see Alicia Vigil(from the Wretched and Divine movie) as she walks around a very run down room with white words written on the wall. These words “God had numbered your days of reign and brought it to an end” thus bringing yet another allusion to the days of the Wild Ones and F.E.A.R. It should also be mentioned that the band is playing in front of what is known as Andy’s Coffin, which he had previously buried his old alias, Andy Six, in. Now the next two lines in the song speak on living and learning from every fable, written by your mind. Andy has claimed to always be very theatrically minded, coming up with the previous concept record and the movie.
Also in the video we see Alicia holding what is known as the BVB rosary, yet another symbol of the BVB Army. In the song, Andy sings of not knowing how to move on, from all he had inside. Andy Six has always been inside of Andy-they are one in the same and it is possible that he’s still trying to fight his alter ego to the ground. During this part of the song, in the video, Alicia is holding the same black binder with the BVB stargram from the movie. Perhaps Andy and the guys are trying to move on from their previous record, which caused the band some strife. Andy has said himself that the last record was mostly his desires for a record and that he let his ego get out of control.
Now, the final part of the first verse speaks on placing that cards on the table. That usually means being honest-no more keeping things hidden. Drawing a line in the sand also means picking sides, which could mean that Andy has finally come to a resolution about his alter ego, Andy Six. Lastly, we all know how prideful Andy is in everything that he does-his career and especially in his music. It is his pride and joy, but in many ways it has made him miserable. In the video during this piece, we see Alicia doodling a sketch that looks like the torn flags that the Wild Ones and their Legion carried to the battle with F.E.A.R.
Living a life of misery Always there, just underneath Haunting me, quietly alone It’s killing me, killing me Dead and gone, what’s done is done You were all I had become I’m letting go of what I once believed So goodbye agony
Andy has said himself that he felt miserable the last year. He felt like he wasn’t himself and that the pressures from the third album and the strain it put on the band had been eating away at him. Something being always there, just underneath could allude to Andy Six-he will always be a part of Andy because that’s who he was for so long. Also the current Andy could be haunted by his former self, which would make him feel even more miserable thinking about how he was when he was Andy Six. It is not unknown that a lot of fans are not happy about Andy shedding his Six moniker, but there’s little to be done about it.
Also, just as the chorus kicks in, we see a boy find Alicia and upon a closer look it is obvious that this is the kid from the Knives and Pens video. Curious that Andy would be singing about his past haunting him and this kid shows up. What’s done is done-Andy had buried Andy Six and can’t bring him back, even though Andy Six was ‘all he had become’. Letting go of what I once believed-we all know Andy was a very hostile and angry young man with his strong opinions and beliefs about how the band should be see and should present themselves. Saying goodbye agony could mean that Andy is letting go of everything that made him miserable, including his current self and way he looks at the world.
Also a lot of the bands wide shots include Andy’s Coffin, again saying that he could possibly be saying a final farewell to Andy Six.
I watch the stars and setting suns As the years are passing by I never knew that hope was fatal Until I looked it in the eye And now I’m not sure I am able To reach the other side Casting out the light
Speaking of years passing, Andy is obviously aware of how far both he and the guys in the band have come from their earlier days. Knowing that he was always hopeful for success, Andy never really saw it until it finally hit him. He has always been honest about how much pressure he is under, especially from fans who claim that he has saved them, which could mean that he feels unable to truly help many when he hasn’t even really been able to help himself.
As this verse begins, we see that now Andy is in front of his coffin, the band behind him. This could mean a lot of things-perhaps he’s trying to move on to a better place with the band and trying to get over past upsets from their experiences with the previous record. Also we see that Alicia and the Knives kid(did he ever get a name?) are sneaking around the area that was seen in BVB’s first video from this record-Heart Of Fire. The entire video speaks of a war, surviving a war and that war could very well of been the one BVB were waging against one another. At the very end of this verse we see a bloody hand print on the 'Bring The War’ banner. This print is known as Andy’s signature for any of his work he does with the Exhibit gallery. Is he claiming responsibility for this war within the band? Also a shadow that alludes to the guards of F.E.A.R seems to pass over it, watching as the two kids disappear in to the earth.
Living a life of misery Always there, just underneath Haunting me, quietly alone It’s killing me, killing me Dead and gone, what’s done is done You were all I had become I’m letting go of what I once believed So goodbye agony Goodbye agony
In the video, Andy is back to standing in front of his coffin just as we see the two kids coming around a darkened corner. Finally we see that they too have come across Andy’s coffin and sitting there, on the end, is his burnt green notebook. That notebook has shown up in a lot of videos for BVB and symbolizes a lot of their past. Andy wrote all of the first record and some of the second in that notebook, but then burned it in the Coffin video to show everyone that he was putting his past to rest. Andy Six had always been there for the fans, but many have claimed that The Prophet had turned cold and unfeeling towards them.
Not alone in forgiving The faithful and the blind Innocence is forsaken I leave 'em all behind And then I see that even angels never die
Could these first few verses mean that Andy knows he has been faithful and blind when it comes to his career? He kind of blinding changed everything about himself, not knowing or thinking about what was going to happen. Innocence being forsaken? Could this mean that Andy knows he’s not innocent in the troubles BVB has had because of their third record? He’s leaving them all behind-he’s moving on, as is the band. They have all spoken about how much better it’s been this time around working on this record, claiming that they are closer than ever. The curious thing is the last line, talking about Angels never dying. Andy and the guys were Fallen Angels not too long ago-perhaps he’s saying there is hope that one day those five Fallen Angels could come rising back to the surface.
Also as Andy sings about innocence, we see the dark outline of the guard again. The entire third record was about an innocent girl, escaping a world that didn’t understand her to a world where people were fighting a power that didn’t care. Notice how the Knives kid is the one who reaches out and touches that burnt notebook? Is it saying that perhaps he recognizes it? Maybe he’s lost all memory of who he used to be and what that book meant to him-just as Andy has. At the very end, when Andy is singing 'Angels never die’ the light in the coffin comes on, illuminating the nearby area. Perhaps his admittance of never losing that Fallen Angel inside has awoken something else within that coffin.
Living a life of misery Always there, just underneath Haunting me, quietly alone It’s killing me, killing me Dead and gone, what’s done is done You were all I had become I’m letting go of what I once believed So goodbye agony Goodbye agony Goodbye agony
In the video we see that that guard is slowing fading away-like the animosity from that third record. Also we see that a few of the guys are now playing in front of the coffin(poor CC!) and that could very well mean that they are putting everything behind them aswell-realizing that sometimes your past has to haunt you in order for you to learn from it. At 'dead and gone’ we finally see a peak in to the coffin and a collective gasp rings out as we realize that it is, in fact, our Andy Six. Wearing war paint of old, Andy indeed is dead and gone. 'You were all I had become’ leads us in to Alicia opening the coffin and us getting a real look at the Andy we once knew and loved. She places the binder from the third album in to the coffin, possibly to bury it and all it represents with the old Andy.
As the song comes to a close, we see that Andy is once again in front of his closed coffin, but the light in still shining inside. He gives a salute which I believe is to his past self, saying that he’s paying a respectful goodbye to who he once was. As the song comes to a grand close, the camera is now inside of the coffin, right up on Andy Six’s face. It’s wonderful seeing that face again and it just stays there until finally his eyes open and his pupils dilate. This could mean a lot of things-the old Andy Six is back seems to be a strong one. I do agree for the most part that it seems like the current Andy wants to bring Andy Six back, but he also knows that 'what’s done is done’ and he can’t bring him back fully.
Andy had admitted that he was not a very nice person this past year and the fans have cried out for the old Andy to come back. The thing is-he can’t be that Andy anymore. The guys are bigger than ever and sneaking out to the back alley for a smoke just isn’t going to happen. All in all I think the guys are coming full circle-this album is the closest they’ve come to their first in a long time-and maybe we will see some of the old BVB style.