buy all of the things meme

VALENTINE’S INSPIRED MEMES
  • “He loves me, he loves me not… oh.”
  • “She loves me, she loves me not… oh.”
  • “I don’t think it’s love…”
  • “So, is there anyone you’re secretly crushing on?”
  • “I don’t even like chocolate.”
  • “Yeah, nothing says ‘I love you’ more than a bouquet that’ll die in two days…”
  • “I’m not sure if they’re a secret admirer or a stalker… but at least they have good taste in gifts.”
  • “Oh! It’s my favourite time of year.”
  • “If I send a mass text to all the people I like, I don’t need to get all of them gifts do I?”
  • “I’ve never had a Valentine.”
  • “Will you be my Valentine?”
  • “Do you have a Valentine yet?”
  • “No one ever serenades me any more.”
  • “Just don’t write a song and play it in front of everyone again… it’s embarrassing.”
  • “Any secret admirers?”
  • “Oh, so you’re my secret admirer?”
  • “I may have been admiring you not so secretly.”
  • “Just because you like me doesn’t mean the feeling is mutual.”
  • “Seeing as we’ve both not got anyone, do you want to come to mine and watch a film?
  • "We’re never getting back together.”
  • “So, he got me a teddy bear, but we fought and he tore off it’s head.”
  • “How about instead of being ridiculous on one day of the year, you just be a decent partner for the other 364 days?!”
  • “We’re not together any more.”
  • “If you haven’t booked a table we definitely won’t get to eat there on such short notice.”
  • “It’s just Valentine’s day… I don’t see the big deal.”
  • “What do you mean you didn’t get me anything?”
  • “I’m feeling sick, is it okay if we arrange our date for another night?”
  • “I’m not sure if they’re a secret admirer or a stalker….”
  • “Well… they don’t know I’m going out with you so we’re going to have a girls night sitting in and cry about being single…”
  • “I’ve got the lube and strawberries, we’re all set!”
  • “I got out the whipped cream and she slammed the door in my face.”
  • “I am not wearing that.”
  • “When he said he would give me a pearl necklace, I thought I was getting actual jewelry.”
  • “It would have been a lot more romantic if you de-thorned the rose before you put it in your mouth…”
  • “I’m all for dressing up… but, how do you wear this?”
  • “If I see another couple holding hands, I’ll… I’ll-”
  • “Young love, isn’t it sweet?”
  • “Who did you get all these roses for?”
  • “I don’t love you, I’m just here for the chocolate.”
  • “So, let me get this right, you want me to be a stand in to make the person you like jealous?”
  • “Valentines? Pft!”
  • “That’s the least romantic thing anyone has ever said to me…”
  • “What are you doing? Why are you on one knee? Get up! Get up!”
  • “My mum gave me a rose because she felt sorry for me.”
  • “Look, you can buy me all the chocolates in the world, I still won’t go out with you.”
  • “A diamond ring? I appreciate the offer… but don’t you think this is a bit… excessive?”
bad idea starters.
  • ❛on a scale of one to ten… how illegal do you think doing this is?❜
  • ❛okay, but, consider this: i don’t care. i’m gonna do it.❜
  • ❛there are certain moments where i consider you someone with brilliant ideas and a good future. this is not one of those moments.❜
  • ❛how hard is it to do a wheelie on a motorcycle? how many feet can you go, doing a wheelie, without crashing?❜
  • ❛it’s three in the morning and i’m bored and you’re the only one awake. let’s break into a gas station store.❜
  • ❛WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT FILL UP A “SUPER BIG GULP” CUP WITH 5 HOUR ENERGY AND CHUG THE WHOLE THING. MY HEART HAS EITHER STOPPED COMPLETELY OR IS BEATING SO FAST THAT I CAN’T FEEL MY OWN PULSE.❜
  • ❛is it a bad idea to use mountain dew instead of milk in your cereal?❜
  • ❛i heard if you suck up enough helium, your voice starts to sound really squeaky… wanna go buy some balloons?❜
  • ❛can you cook bacon with a hair straightener? asking for a friend.❜
  • ❛yes, i did beat him up and i will not apologize.❜
  • ❛complaining helps the situation, like, not at all.❜
  • ❛sooooo, i kind of adopted a puppy.❜
send me a ship and i’ll tell you
  • who hogs the duvet
  • who texts/rings to check how their day is going
  • who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts
  • who gets up first in the morning
  • who suggests new things in bed
  • who cries at movies
  • who gives unprompted massages
  • who fusses over the other when they’re sick
  • who gets jealous easiest
  • who has the most embarrassing taste in music
  • who collects something unusual
  • who takes the longest to get ready
  • who is the most tidy and organised
  • who gets most excited about the holidays
  • who is the big spoon/little spoon
  • who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports
  • who starts the most arguments
  • who suggests that they buy a pet
  • what couple traditions they have
  • what tv shows they watch together
  • what other couple they hang out with
  • how they spend time together as a couple
  • who made the first move
  • who brings flowers home
  • who is the best cook
dream girl asks

sweet faerie: do you feel comfortable around  nature? why ?
hollywood starlet: invent a movie where you could be the main character
graceful princess: are you capricious ? what do you like to have the most ?
heaven queen: If you had a kingdom, describe what it would look like.
wild witch: if you were to be a wizard, what power(s) would you have?
shy nymph: Do you like it when people flirt with you? How do you flirt ?
dark angel: Is there a secret you’ll keep with you until the end of time?
femme fatale: How many people have you kissed/seduced ?
rich doll: if you had all the money in the world, what thing would you buy first?
devilish beauty: post a selfie (or reblog an old one)
famous model: describe your favorite outfit//link clothing you’d like to buy

add more if u want ♥♥

Monsta X: Wonho relationship headcanons

A/N: in honour of this plushie’s birthday 🎀🎂


 • honestly he’s the best bf material and will probably always treat you like a princess no matter how bad his day went

 • always brings you flowers after he hasn’t seen you all day. After a while it becomes your guys’ thing. Every time he sees pretty flowers he’ll think of you and won’t hesitate to buy them

 • really shy sometimes so won’t be too much of a show off with you (at first) but will eventually warm up and start showing you affection even if it’s just in front of his friends

 • little forehead kisses and meaningless whispers are his thing

 • just wants to be close enough to whisper something in your ear

 • it’s probably a meme or a stupid joke but I wouldn’t complain tbh 

 • super important for him to have you get along with his parents and brother 

 • same with yours as well, always takes meeting them for dinner or lunch super seriously

 • “but…what if they don’t like this tie? What if these shoes aren’t clean enough?” “Wait, maybe I put too much hair gel.”

 • his parents obvs love you and are your biggest shippers lmao 

• though he’s mentioned he’s not interested in marrying, I think once he falls in love he’ll fall hard and takes your relationship very seriously

 • gym buddies. Don’t even argue with him over the matching sweats bc he’s gonna force you to wear them or he’s gonna cry

 • morning cuddles are a must

 • you thought you were just gonna go to the bathroom? Think again. This boy will not let you go without at least 1 hour of cuddling 

 • does seem like the jealous type, so beware of the green monster 

 • though he trusts you very much, he doesn’t trust other guys around you so he seldom leaves your side if you’re out in public 

 • ofc his arm is always around you, his signature goofy smile plastered on his goofy face

 • loves you to death and hates seeing you cry, will most likely end up crying himself and holding you for like 10000 hours pls don’t cry in front of him

 • all in all, pls take care of this plushy and always make Ramen for him 💓

Originally posted by kihn

Send “ouo” and I’ll check all that apply

As your friend I am open to:
Hugging [  ]
Casual Touching [  ]
Cuddling [  ]
Holding Hands [  ]
Hair Petting [  ]
Sharing a sleeping surface [  ]
Seeing you in various states of undress [  ]
You seeing me in various states of undress [  ]
Cooking for you [  ]
Letting you eat off my plate [  ]
Buying you things without occasion [  ]
Receiving gifts without occasion [  ]
Chaste Kisses [  ]
Letting you sit in my lap [  ]
Sitting in your lap [  ]

Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I’m in the seventh year (I’m seventeen). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there.

One last thing.

I’m weird.
I’m a weirdo.
I don’t fit in.
I don’t want to fit in.
Have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on?
Weird.

naomi and ely’s no kiss list sentence meme

feel free to change the pronouns and things to fit your muse!

  • “18 years of apartment living and you still believe pressing the down button speeds up the elevator’s arrival.”
  • “i lie all the time.”
  • “i think we should get married here!”
  • “______ may be new but he’s hotter than everyone else.”
  • “you know why i love you? when i feel like sticking my head in an oven, you pull it out and you put cookies in there instead.”
  • “let’s eat cookie dough!”
  • “you’re giving me that same look you gave me when i told you whole foods stopped carrying chocolate chip bagels.”
  • “snuggle me?”
  • “since when do you actually go around kissing boys?”
  • “i’ve always been totally gay.”
  • “i know! i shouldn’t love a girl who toys so carelessly with other people’s emotions, especially mine.”
  • “is that your girlfriend? she must be really pretty.”
  • “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH A FREAKING SLEDGEHAMMER?”
  • “god, you’re beautiful.”
  • “this is fun, you and me doing girl talk. i’ve never done it.”
  • “you’re a virgin? no way!”
  • “your beauty, do you use it for good or for evil?”
  • “people make the mistake of letting beauty guide attraction.”
  • “wait a sec. you make out with my boyfriend and i’m not being fair?”
  • “you’re my top priority.”
  • “let me buy you breakfast!”
  • “i’m twice your size. leave. now.”
  • “what was your favorite song on the mixtape? did you like it?”
  • “you’re not a bad face to see first thing.”
  • “you’re exactly like my dad.”
  • “you hate it! you’re washing it down!”
  • “that sight of your smile and that laugh gave me the smallest glimmer of hope. and that’s all i needed.”
  • “______ was just being who he is. and i love him for who he is.”

I’m getting sick of all the memes floating around that bemoan how we “work so hard” to “buy things we don’t need,” or whatever, especially when they imply most of us who do work only do so in order to get an iPhone or whatever. I realize that it can seem like that’s what’s going on, but in reality, people work because they’ll starve if they don’t

Yeah, sure, people buy iPhones or whatever, but I’m pretty sure most people, if given a choice, would forgo the iPhone for the chance to not have to work their entire life. People aren’t “vapid consumer drones” or whatever because they’ve got a job and occasionally buy things they want. I mean, what would be the less-”shallow” option? Be homeless? Starve?

dk as a boyfriend woohoo

Originally posted by minpoong

i’m writing this because i am self indulgent and a terrible person

  • first off, you’re going to have to be really really understanding and give off good vibes if you’re going to date him
  • I MEAN HE’S THE LITERAL SUN 
  • i can see him with someone who’s independent yet relies on him?? like is completely their own person, but also depends on him 
  • a lot of jokes!! this boy is hilarious
  • holding hands and swinging them super super high until they do a 360 and both your arms are twisted
  • he needs someone he can goof off with!! like sing and dance to maroon 5 at like 3 in the morning
  • cue a pissed off jihoon
  • the cutest selfies!! like they’re so natural and not……… fake at all, just the both of you beaming into the camera?? LIKE WOW SO BRIGHT
  • super casual like shorts and shirts and walking around town in slippers and his arm slung around your shoulders
  • walking dates!! boundless energy and racing in parks and next to the han river and eating ramen after running up and down
  • sitting on railings and talking about everything; his fears, your fears and just opening up to each other YAY
  • would sit on your bed with you, the both of you just using your phones and chillin
  • would be so enthralled by his s/o’s candid poses and faces 
  • WOULD KILL TO SEE YOU IN HIS SHIRT
  • like just casually wearing one of his old shirts to sleep and !!!!!! LEE SEOKMIN IS DEAD HE’S GONE 
  • leans on your shoulder while using his phone and you just take a snapchat video and he looks up and EYE SMILE BOOM 
  • SINGS WITH YOU TO YOU AND FOR YOU
  • SINGS
  • you’re also automatic friends with the whole of seventeen btw
  • fights would be bad. like real bad.
  • he would be so affected and sad and not even angry about it?? just so sad and droopy and it gets so bad that the whole of seventeen practically begs you two to make up
  • loves waking up and seeing your half awake face buried in blankets
  • hugging??? more like hanging himself off you every moment of the daY
  • WHEN HE GOES ON TOURS HE BUYS YOU SOUVENIRS AND THINGS AND TRINKETS and you also get all the concert merch he wore?? like the shirts and the jackets and things
  •  a lot of lame ass jokes
  • if you send him memes in the middle of the night he wouldn’t get them but he’d laugh so fucking hard everyone else wakes up
  • BACKHUGS OK BYE

OVERALL just a super sweet, chill boyf who smiles alot and loves you to pieces!!! 

requests are open!

BTS As Roommates

“Hey I don’t know if the request is still open but could u do a how would it be having bts (any member of ur choice) as ur roommate? Thank u, love ur blog.💖“


So, because this was a super fun request idea, I decided to do A L L the members. Idk how long this will take me but pray for me my dudes. (ty sweet human for the compliment aw <3)

Rap Monster:

Originally posted by baebsaes

(look at this absolute darn cutie)

  • tbh i think he’s barely at home.
  • he’ll be spending all of his damn time in the studio so much so that you often forget he’s your roommate.
  • sometimes you text him like “do you know what a roommate is you lanky meme?” and offer to buy takeaway for the night.
  • throwing things at him when he snores bc you can hear him through the walls.
  • “(Y/N) why did you throw that at me?”
    “KIM NAMJOON I NEED TO SLEEP”
  • bless him, it’s not his fault.
  • asking you whether his outfit looks okay before he goes out.
  • always has his headphones in, so you often yell at him bc this dork can’t hear you.
  • you’re always worried about him
  • boy can’t hold a knife properly, he needs protecting.
  • him always losing things.
  • you always having to find his things.
  • him borrowing your things and losing them
  • him getting really angry about losing his things only for you find them in an obvious place.
  • you cook and he cleans bc that is the safest arrangement.
  • when neither of you can sleep, you stay up and talk about life.
  • when he breaks things, he gets hella nervous and doesn’t reply to texts.
  • him being on edge whenever you leave the house.
  • just pls keep an eye on him, okay?

Keep reading

AVPS inspired rp starters (part 3/?)
Feel free to change pronouns  !

  • ‘’I bet you’re the one who gets all of the boys to buy you things.’‘
  • ‘‘I like your twisted humor!’‘
  • ‘‘I’d say we can assume we’re gonna get along.’‘
  • ‘‘Before we go any further, there’s a confession I’d like to make.’‘
  • ‘‘I’ve never been with a man before.’‘
  • ‘‘And two days later, that kid died.’‘
  • ‘‘It’s the most haunted place in all of Great Britain.’‘
  • ‘‘Where’s your sense of Halloween adventure?’‘
  • ‘‘I’ll give a big, fat kiss to whoever’s brave enough to go up there and ring the bell up.’‘
  • ‘‘Everything I’ve ever read tells me that those urban legends are just old wives’ tales.’‘
  • ‘‘I want you to carry my books for the rest of the semester.’’
  • ‘‘There’s another monster in here. And this one’s probably not as friendly.’‘
  • ‘‘Quick! Let’s go while it’s distracted!’‘
  • ‘‘All sorts of creepy creatures live there!’‘
  • ‘‘We’re going from the scariest place in the world to the scariest place in the world.’‘
  • ‘‘I just thought that if once I did something crazy, then maybe you guys would like me.’‘
  • ‘‘You don’t need to pretend to be something you’re not just to get people to like you.’‘
  • ‘‘I’m something called a douchebag.’‘
  • ‘‘I make weird covers of Disney songs. Who does that?’‘ 
  • ‘‘I’m like Jesse McCartney. I’m Jesse McCartney’s douche.’‘
  • ‘‘I’m like Shia LaBeouf. Prince Douche.’‘
  • ‘‘Well, there’s some things in life you just can’t go through without becoming friends afterwards, namely one of them being taking on a twelve-foot vampire.’‘
  • ‘‘It sounds like a funny problem, but it’s actually not.’‘
  • ‘‘It appears he’s killed a beautiful doe in some kind of… bloodlust.’‘
  • ‘‘He’s a jerk! And you can quote me on that!’‘
  • ‘‘What’s the goofiest thing you’ve ever done? Because I bet I just topped it.’‘
  • ‘‘My actions led directly to the death of the only thing I ever loved.’‘
  • ‘‘This is probably twice as funny as that!’‘
  • ‘‘To make a long story short, we ended up going home together.’‘
  • ‘‘The first thing that came out of my mouth was: aaaaaaaah!’‘
  • ‘‘Did you get my text?’‘
  • ‘‘Well, you didn’t text me back.’‘
  • ‘‘Last night was the most amazing night of my life.’‘
Love-ly sentence starters

The obligatory Valentine theme. Various lyrics and sayings!

“Love’s a luxury I can’t afford.”
“Who needs love when you have a full fridge?”
“’I love you’. Why’s that so hard to say?”
“I think you’ve practiced enough in front of the mirror.”
“Maybe it’s time for me to fall in love… but no, no. I want to make money first.”
“You’re more awkward than a mannequin in front of them.”
”You are beautiful.”
”You’re my universe.”
“It’s such a lovely scenery.. I wish you could be here.”
”I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“When you do that it makes me want to hug you tightly and never let go.”
“I miss you so much.”
”You’re so warm. Can I stay here for a bit longer?”
“I just wanna fall in love.”
”Stay the night.”
”We’re all worried over how lovestruck you are.”
”You’re such a beautiful view.”
“I’m waiting for someone who can make me feel something like never before.”
“You turned so red.”
“Did they say yes?”
“I’ve been thinking about you all day.”
“I thought this would look nice on you.”
“I call dibs on you.”
”I want to be more than friends.”
“You- you’re like- from head to toe- wow.”
“You’re the only who didn’t know about this.”
“Let’s buy a shit ton of chocolate after Valentine’s.”
“Are you alright? You look nervous.”
“Can I tell you something?”
“I’m so lucky to have met you.”
“I’ve got a special delivery for you. Let’s just say those roses won’t be the only thing that’s coming tonight.”

Boyfriend!Joshua

Originally posted by amillionwon

  • this group is filled with memeboys and even if he didn’t seem like one in the beginning he’s def a meme boy
  • but like if you take a look at him for like 1 sec you know he’s so fucking kindhearted and gentle
  • he’s the embodiment of a fluffly fanfic
  • never raises his voice when he’s angry
  • does he even get angry? it’s more like a little irritated
  • but he’s the boy you wanna take home to your parents he’ll treat you so nicely
  • also fucking cliche cheesy things like giving his jacket when you’re cold, opening the door for you, if the collar of your jacket isn’t right he’ll straighten it and stuff
  • also fucking serenading on his guitar and you bet he’s gonna change some lyrics in the song to make it either funny or insert a memory of you both
  • he will have a pic of you as his background def
  • and be 0% embarrassed about it if someone mentions because he’s just so chill
  • but don’t get me wrong he was a stuttering mess before you started dating or at the beginning of your relationship
  • but he’s just a calming person like and very understanding and supporting, like for instant you’re not christian he’ll be v accepting and encouraging for you to do what you believe in
  • would love love giving but also receiving forehead kisses
  • sometimes hand kisses because those make you a cute mess
  • wouldn’t care what fashion style you had like if you were always clothed casual af or always dressed up he wouldn’t care
  • because you gotta do you
  • if it’s getting colder better prepare yourself for the cuddlefest 
  • he will like being the big spoon tho like he might be a sub but I think he’s want to wrap his arms around you because he’s all about making you feel loved and safe
  • hot chocolate/coffee with movies is a thing for you to
  • IT’S SIN TIME HOW WILL I DO THAT WITH THIS FLUFF
  • okay we know he’s like very tender and soft and I think that would stay the same with making out
  • like with his finger under your chin softly touching your side with his other hand
  • basically he wants to make your heart explode because this boy will be your end
  • teasing you and not immediately kissing you but just staring at you while being 2 cm apart
  • you gotta take the initiative on this sorry
  • if you start going a little less softly he’ll give in because this guy he has a few more tricks up his sleeve
  • instead of laying his hand on your side it’ll disappear under your shirt or get on your ass
  • also when you part he won’t stop like he’ll attack your neck this little nasty
  • up to your jaw to start again
  • OKAY THIS WAS ENLIGHTENING
  • he cares very much about you and he would want people to know about you and funny stuff you did and shit
  • like ‘Hahaha guys you gotta hear what Y/n told me yesterday!!’
  • is only good at keeping secrets when he knows they’re really important
  • but like a juicy story about someone I mean heh he’s a gossiper
  • if he ever tells something you really didn’t want him to he’ll forever feel guilty like sometimes he’ll apologise for it again months after because he thought of it again
  • also little surprises like leaving a note somewhere in a hidden place like in a really messy closet ‘finally you cleaned up this mess that you call your room xxJosh’
  • just him being memish and funny all the time
  • no strange 3am texts because he wouldn’t want to wake you up
  • also dates with Joshua are a mess like you’d think he has everything figured out but he’s a last minute guy
  • maybe you wanted to go to a restaurant, tuns out he made no reservations and you have to go search around the whole area for a restaurant where there is actually a table free
  • you go to mcdonalds in fancy clothes because you were supposed to go to this fancy restaurant
  • also he is a guy that loves taking selfies but wouldn’t initiate it so just ask, he’ll be thankful
  • a pic of your fancy clothed mcdonalds date was his background for months because he found it so funny and he loved telling the story
  • teasing him is so so funny 
  • also if you give him something very ridiculous as a gift and you know it’s horribly embarrassing he will still love it
  • that tshirt with a huge picture of him making a horrible meme face
  • but at least that’s what you think because he just thinks it’s funny and will ironically wear it
  • and guess what you’re getting for valentines day?
  • A SHIRT WITH AN UGLY SNAPCHAT OF YOU
  • eventually you’ll agree on swapping the shirts and that’s how your couple item obsession begun
  • just he loves all matching things, on tour he’ll buy one thing in each country if they have some
  • phone cases are his fave
  • I’m guessing you’ll be close to some other members but not all just like some of them but the ones you know well will be like almost best friends
  • all the English convos just he wants to keep practicing his English so he won’t lose it and being honest Hansols English isn’t like top level
  • and I think he really really misses speaking English a lot like it’s a part of him and not getting to speak English is really a pain in the ass
  • he uses yolo and stuff ironically don’t worry he’s up to date with his memes
  • wow this got longer than I thought it would…

Masterlist

Others in the Boyfriend!Series:

S.Coups// Jeonghan//Joshua//Jun//Hoshi//Wonwoo//Woozi//DK//Mingyu//The8//Seungkwan//Vernon//Dino

MAGIC FUNHOUSE SENTENCE STARTERS; EP 1

WARNING;  A LOT OF THESE WILL BE PRETTY OFFENSIVE.
( FEEL FREE TO CHANGE ANY PRONOUNS AS NEEDED! )

❝ the fuck are you? ❞
❝ and i thought i would have a future by now. ❞
❝ ____! dildos in my dressing room again?! ❞
❝ i said no dairy! are you trying me make me blow these kids across the parking lot?! ❞
❝ the hell is that in your hand? ❞
❝ oh, its a mold of the policeman’s penis. ❞
❝ hide these, now! ❞
❝ you’re fucking disgusting, you know that? ❞
❝ you need therapy. ❞
❝ don’t fuck up my show. ❞
❝ you should fire that guy. ❞
❝ get back here you gremlin! ❞
❝ the worst part is i’m still alive. ❞
❝ i’m a hungry bitch. ❞
❝ i want him gone! ❞
❝ fuckin’ kill yourself, vegetables! ❞
❝ well somebody’s a salty shrimp today. ❞
❝ it’s margarine you bitch. ❞
❝ she’s right, and that says a lot because she’s a woman. ❞
❝ i can’t hear you, i’m angry. ❞
❝ first off, school is a waste of time and i don’t trust the judgement of anyone willing to attend it. ❞
❝ the airhorn will be blown in your face every time you piss me off. ❞
❝ the topic of this weeks episode is every child’s nightmare: bad grammar. ❞
❝ bitch, puberty hit you. ❞
❝ i just threw up in my mouth. ❞
❝ divorce is about children coming to terms with what they caused! ❞
❝ help yourself out the door! ❞
❝ he’s easy on the eyes. ❞
❝ i fuckin’ hate this job. ❞
❝ i thought you were gay! ❞
❝ and to think i was going to let you measure my vagina! ❞
❝ i ate a rare candy and i think i need to get my stomach pumped! ❞
❝ run your stupid ass to the pick n’ save and buy some goddamn sugar! ❞
❝ help! i don’t think the bathroom is real! ❞
❝ if i wanted to know what day of the week it was, i would’ve hired a calendar. ❞
❝ go stand in your corner. ❞
❝ mommy and daddy are getting divorced and it’s all your fault. ❞
❝ mommy doesn’t want you, and daddy doesn’t love you–– ❞
❝ i’ve gotta go do my pre-show jack off. ❞
❝ don’t worry, we still have camera two–– ❞
❝ so when mommy and daddy leave each other, it’s a good thing! ❞
❝ mommy! leave daddy for my birthday! ❞

Living with Up10tion includes

for @bitchvilm because i was to excited to not write this right now lmao

Living With Up10tion Includes:

Originally posted by shownusgrl

-CHAOS

-But let’s get some backstory first

-you were probably a friend of one of the hyungs

-probably Kuhn or Jinhoo because they would want their best friend to meet the boys

-you ended up becoming the mom friend

-you know that one friend

-the one that helps the others when they are sick

-cooks and cleans for them

-comforts them

-coddles them

-practices the dances with them when they can’t get it right

-helps them learn other languages

-takes the aesthetic pictures for them

-you know those friends?

-yeah, that’s you, I hope you like your job now

-but the boys absolutely adore you and know that without you they probably wouldn’t be as close as before

-so they asked you to move in

-and you looked at them with so much frustration when you thought they were joking

-you didn’t say anything and just walked out

-they were so confused

-they thought they had done something wrong

-Kogyeol had to talk to you to actually make you believe that they actually wanted you to live with them

-you were so embarrassed when you realized that you had made them feel bad

-you felt awful and ended up asking their manager for a key to the dorm so you could throw a little surprise for them

-the manager smirked and handed you the key but not before saying that his room was now yours

-you immediately moved some of your clothes and other items into the room.

-you only had about 5 hours to get the party done

-so you really just brought a toothbrush, makeup and clothes

-you were going to make them a cake and all that

-but you ended up cleaning up the place instead

-when you had an hour left, you decided to just order a pizza and chicken and call it a night

-when the boys walked in they were 100% surprised that the dorm actually looked nice because you hadn’t visited since you walked out

-come to think of it, the other boys still thought you were mad

-when you heard them walk in you just stood up off the couch and waiting awkwardly for them to follow the smell of food.

-you were attacked by screams and hugs when you announced that you were living with them

-the dorm was cramped but you spent everyday with your best friends so that was fun

-being dorks with Jinhoo

-yelling at the boys with Kuhn

-exercising and then regretting it with Kogyeol

-Wei teaching you how to rap

-Bit-to practicing until you forcefully drag him home

-Wooshin making you upset because he doesn’t love you

-but he does, he just hates cuddles

-so he makes it up to you by buying you things

-Sunyeol teaching you how to expand your singing range

-Gyujin playing with your hair when he’s upset

-Hwanhee cuddling you all the time

-he’s like a koala

-Xiao treating you like mom

-he even calls you ‘eomma’ sometimes

-that’s how much he appreciates you

-the boys adore you

-and you adore them

-I want to live with them

-please?

Stereotypical MBTI as weird things people I know do

ESTJ: Admit that sometimes they’re wrong, but when they’re wrong, they don’t admit it

ISTJ: Has to eat one sandwich, one fruit, and one snack every lunch, unless it’s not a “proper lunch”. Eats everyone else’s food anyway because their lunch is small.

ESFJ: Says that the car has a blind spot. It is pointed out to them that the car itself does not have a blind spot, but that the mirrors are adjusted for someone else. Doesn’t adjust the mirrors and says “well it’s still a blind spot” because they don’t want to adjust the person’s mirrors.

ISFJ: Has big dreams of becoming a neurosurgeon, but goes to insufficient college close to home out of insecurity and duty, never fulfilling dream because ends up staying at home caring for mother.

ENTP: Pokes and bothers everyone for amusement

INTP: Is in the friend group but is only seen like once a month because they disappear and nobody knows where. They aren’t mad, just have other things to do than talk to people. Only wears T-shirts with puns on them.

ENFP: Screams. Dreams of big road trip with all of their friends

INFP: Never sleeps. Never cleans. Unaware of how bad their habits are. But buys nice things for people all the time.

ESTP: Owns sports car. Wears sunglasses. Dresses like hipster. Always going 20 mph over the speed limit.

ISTP: Talks to like two people. Looks angry 24/7. Really nice tho.

ESFP: Goes to Disneyland like everyday. Dates everyone. Really nice. Dresses really nice.

ISFP: Doesn’t talk much. Is smol. No one knows what they’re like?? Takes really good pictures.

ENTJ: Unbelievably loud voice. Laughs at everyone and scares everyone. Is somehow good at everything.

INTJ: “Hey, look at this.” *shows you meme*. Tries to offend people on purpose to destroy their arguments. Definitely evil

ENFJ: Sounds like Disney princess when talking. Easily worried. Is secretly dork but only is dork when someone approves

INFJ: Runs into things when hungry. Is psychologist. Takes pictures of things they think are cool but is kinda weird. Wants to take control of projects they don’t seem to care about. If dinner is even a minute late, will be fending for themself, completely giving up unreasonably

Expectation v. Reality: DMMD Edition
  • aoba expectation: "It's super awesome day to be an innocent protagonist who doesn't know what he's in for!" /sunshine and rainbows and late to anime school
  • aoba reality: "fucking shit im so fucking done just knock me out and carry me home i wanna nap for 12 hours and eat donuts and dicks until i pass out fuckin dON'T TOUCH MY HAIR GODDAMNIT"
  • koujaku exectation: "hello llllladies I have a dark tragic past but awesome swordplay skills ill use to defeat my sworn anime rival" /brooding angst
  • koujaku reality: /drops aoba 12 times "I-I-uuuuuhh kjshdjksd s-so embarrassed DONT LOOK AT ME YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS" /trips over himself hits his face on a curling iron and cries in a pool of his own blood
  • noiz expectation: "im the stereotypical computer nerd going outside is illogical" /uses math in mario kart
  • noiz reality: "Hehehe you like my dick piercings dont you you cum-thirsty twink yeah fight me in rhyme and bite my cock while I hack into your asshole with my fresh meme skills" /stuffs face with pizza and churros and then buys all of mexico
  • clear expectation: "herp derp im a robot i don't understand societal conventions" /zany antics and comic relief
  • clear reality: "Allow us to engage in sophisticated conversation about the particulars of life and death whilst I serenade you, making you fall deeply in love with me before I crush your heart by dying a tragic -- HOLY BALLS A SHINY THING" /vibrates and giggles excitedly "PUPPIES!"
  • mink expectation: /silent brooding character who only says one or two words and beats up everything
  • mink reality: "my navajo ancestors are talking to me and THEY SAID TO KNOCK YOUR SHIT OUT" /punches someone half his size repeatedly in the face "COMMENCE THE PURIFICATION RITUAL" /decapitating people while motorbiking over buildings