but-anyway-do-i-care-the-answer-is-no

anonymous asked:

u know its bad to bleach/dye ur hair as much as u do :\ also did u identify as trans/male before you ever got on tumblr/the internet ??

I don’t care a whole lot about the condition of my hair, but I also do a very good job spacing out my processes and deep conditioning in between. Also do you really think that I would be able to do as much with my hair and not know the effects of what I do?

Your second question is very pointed, but I’ll answer is anyway. Yes. I’ll start out by saying that as a child, I didn’t really identify with any gender. I was simply a child. Things started not fitting when I hit puberty, and body parts started coming in that I thought were wrong.
While I didn’t have the words when I was younger to know what being “trans” was (since no one talks to kids about that kind of thing), I had said to myself that I would “rather be a boy” since I was 12. Thinking that was an impossibility and that something was wrong with me, i tried to suppress that. When I cut my hair short at the age of 14, I remember the first thing I did was see if I could make myself look like a boy. That same year, I told my boyfriend at the time how I “sometimes thought I should be a boy”, and he would call me his boyfriend when we were alone. I expressed some of the frustration I felt by trying to take pictures of myself that looked masculine and made assorted social media sites where I was a boy named Spencer (this was about 2 years before I had a tumblr) and kind of role played as the person I felt I should be, I had had the name spencer picked out since I was 13. Around 14-15 I think my feeling like I was a boy was more presently in my mind, but here’s where the suppression came in. I would think to myself “well if I can’t be a boy I’ll be good at being a girl” (whatever the fuck that even means), and I started dressing more and more girly, hiding behind more and more makeup, and feeling less and less like myself.
Now, about halfway through me being 15, I made my tumblr. I also started researching what being “trans” was. Tumblr did help me with terminology, and gave me words to search, but most of my information came from outside sources. It provided me with the term “genderfluid” which I identified as as sort of an in between point for a while. I knew it didn’t really fit, but it was a step up from “girl” for me. When I was 16, I was at the gay pride parade. I looked around me and saw all these people loving each other no matter who they were. I saw a community who wouldn’t abandon me no matter what I was. I had an epiphany at that moment, that if I wanted to be happy, I had to admit to myself that I was a boy. That’s how I came out to myself.
My last ex boyfriend (while an A hole) was more open minded, and when I told him how I felt, he helped me look into it, lent me masculine clothes, and called me spencer when I asked him to. When I was about 16, I started going to a queer support group and making friends who addressed me as Spencer and used male pronouns. They gave me my first binder, and I started dressing like a boy where ever I went, and my family just kind of caught on after a while. Later that year I had my first real talk with my mom about me being trans, and she wasn’t happy (mostly because she knows being trans is hard, and she loves me and doesn’t want my life to be hard), and we’ve had little talks over the past few years and now everything is out in the open. I also changed schools when I was 17, and went to every class individually and asked the teachers to use the name spencer and male pronouns. Most do a good job of it. Now fast forward through me being out and feeling more like myself, I got my name legally changed to Spencer a few months ago. And here we are now.

Well I hadn’t really planned on making a whole timeline of my process, but I’ve wanted to do it for a while I guess. Please remember that there was obviously more to it than this, but if I was going to write out every detail of my life since I was 12, it would be even longer. Probably more than you wanted anyway.

TL;DR: I’ve been queer a long time. Yes, even before tumblr.

lesbian-sam1899 asked:

What I don't get is how on Cutthroat Kitchen men consider the other men bigger competition than the women. But (sarcasm) "a women's place is in the kitchen". So are women supposed to be in the kitchen making shitty food, or what? I don't get men.

well you see women are supposed to cook well – but for free.

when men do it, it’s a profession. when women do it, it’s their duty.

princesspeppa asked:

Hey Louise, not sure if this is the right place to ask but I seen you are answering questions so I will anyway lol, have you put the Disney vlogs up yet?! Or when will you be doing them? I just don't have regular access to Internet as I stay at my poorly nans to care for her and I don't want to miss them! Thank you for being you! You've helped me more than I could explain!! Lots of hugs, loves and prayers. Kay x x

Hello!! I will be putting them up but it will be a while. My friend Marie has had some traumatic life news and so is taking a break from the internet and we want to upload them at the same time so I’m waiting. I don’t know how long she will take and won’t be asking her because I don’t want her to feel any pressure whilst she is dealing with a lot of family stuff <3 xxx

anonymous asked:

so i quit shaving my armpits and all I've gotten from it is hate about how unsanitary it is..?? i recall seeing a post of yours explaining how it isn't unsanitary and was wondering if u could link it or something, much love c:

congrats mamas!! 

http://frothmagazine.com/no-shave-no-shade/

“One common judgment I receive is concerning the hygiene of having armpit hair. This is really laughable, as shaving is less hygienic than letting it grow! Shaving leads to little abrasions in the skin which “increase the risk of bacterial or viral infections, although the risk is generally fairly minimal. More common are problems such as ingrown hairs, which can become infected” (x). Plus, I’m much cleaner now that I show off my pit fur. I take care of it just like I do with the hair on my head. Yep, shampoo and conditioner go underneath these gals arms. Anyways, there’s no definitive answer as to what the purpose of hair is, but it’s believed to wick sweat and moisture (preventing you from getting all slimy and smelly as it’s really the bacteria causing unpleasant odor) as well as releasing pheromones! Primal shit, really. And none of it is “gross” or “dirty” or whatever other bullshit that’s been crammed down your throat.”

anonymous asked:

Hey I was wondering when we can send some ship quotes. Like maybe you can accept them once every two months or something's? And not just limit them to Valentine's Day? Sorry this is just my suggestion

Hmmm, right now we “officially” don’t accept quotes that promote specific ships (i.e. the quote directly references or implies that two or more characters are flirting/in a relationship/were a couple/etc.), but sometimes they’ll get posted anyways because they make me laugh or they’re extra clever or for some other reason that sounded good at the time I was queuing the post.  There are a variety of reasons for the shippy quote ban, but really they all boil down to making this blog a lot easier to run.  As it stands right now, I think that I‘ll probably continue to weed those type of quotes out of the inbox.

Despite that, the possibility of this blog becoming more ship-friendly in the future is definitely on the table!  I enjoyed the valentines event and I’m not averse to repeating it!  Your suggestion to allow shippy quotes every other month is intriguing, but it definitely has some issues.  Allowing shippy stuff into the queue normally is all good and well, but making sure it gets published within a certain time frame is kind of a chore.  Remember, the queue is pretty consistently around 100 quotes these days, and with four posts getting published a day it takes ~25 days for a submission to get posted.  That means that no matter what we do (as long as we continue to get at least 4 submissions a day to maintain the queue), there’s almost an entire month’s delay between the start of a shippy submission period and the time the quotes would finally be seen by you guys, which would majorly stagger your hypothetical every other month schedule and cause confusion.

I’m not saying that this is a bad idea or anything, but there’s got to be a way to make the process easier to manage and to understand.  What if we did something like having shippy saturday/sunday instead?  (something like this would either be a weekly thing where all the shippy quotes we get during the week are scooted in the queue to be posted on the weekend or something where we only post shippy quotes if we get them on saturday/sunday but they’d get posted in real time.  idk, I’d have to work out the details) Would people be willing to participate in that?  This is purely speculation, but I’m fairly certain that it would be much simpler to shuffle things once a week rather than all month long.

Give me some feedback, guys.  Where do you stand on this?

anonymous asked:

How do you keep yourself motivated? Sorry if it in your FAQ I'm on mobile and can't see a link to it :/

The link’s at the bottom of my bio, but you won’t find the answer in there, because there is none.

I don’t stay motivated. Motivation is temporary. It comes and goes. If you only work when you’re motivated to do so, be prepared to fail.

You must learn to push yourself when you see no point. You need to form habits that make you stronger. You don’t train because you feel like it, you train because you want to win. You may not care about winning at the moment, but you you put aside those thoughts and do what you must anyway.

Training, eating right, and working towards my goals are not activities that I do on a whim, they are responsibilities that I place on myself. They are just a part of my routine.

Think of it like brushing your teeth. You’re not thinking about getting pearly whites every morning when you do it. You know that you could save a few minutes and probably not end up with a cavity if you skipped a morning, but you brush anyway. That’s what training is like for me. I’m not always motivated to brush my teeth, but I still do it. I’m not always motivated to work my ass off, but I still do it.

anonymous asked:

Do you get jealous?

yeah i do…

i actually can get really jealous,  i don’t like showing my jealousy and i don’t tell people when I’m jealous, i don’t really like being jealous anyway so i bottle it all up and I’m scared one day I’m just going to explode and let it all out… and i think that’s what I’m most afraid of…

i pretend im not jealous though, like if something is happening i will say i don’t care because for example in a relationship i still want my partner to have freedom as well without me being all uptight about it which i am anyway so i don’t say anything… at all.

Reiji might not open his door but he’d sure as will at least see something on his phone as that seemed to never to be missed. He was stuck at work anyways. It didn’t even have to be answered for all he cared. 

[Text:] Judging by the fact that Otomi showed up at my
apartment last night to talk to Tokiko and didn’t look too happy.
[Text:] I got no idea what was going on I wasn’t paying them 
attention but just checking on you.

clowntypeidol

‘Do you love him?

That is honestly such a difficult and complex answer. I don’t even understand the concept of love. Love to me is who will be there for you through anything, who will support you in anyway that you need. Love is when you share an understanding with someone and you both respect each other, and will do whatever you can to make the other happy and comfortable. With him, it’s not like that. With him, I want to take care of him and understand his thoughts. I want to tame his demons. I want to be able to feel the heat of his body on mine, and be able to wake up in the morning tangled in his bed. I wouldn’t call that love though. To me that is lust mixed with a type of love that isn’t really love. But god if I ever get the chance to really love him, and he to love me, I think we’d have something so amazing that even galaxies would be jealous.’

—  e.d. 7:54am (del-u-sion-al)

deidaralover7333 asked:

When you say group stuff, do you mean with multiple guys at the same time? Also what are your feelings on both doing the fucking and getting fucked? (But I guess you already answered the getting fucked part)

Oh yes. Check the posts from just after my birthday.

I’ve known the guy for a couple of years now. He’s very professional about everything, wouldn’t let me join in until I was seventeen and legal. Probably hated that he told me about that. Didn’t care that I was getting a load of sex anyway.

Starts off with, like, basic threesomes and shit, then moves on to heavier stuff as you get used to it. No exceptions, not even for me. I’ve always enjoyed taking and being the proverbial bitch more, but I can get behind giving as well. Either way’s good. Can’t really justify why, that’s just, like, how it is.

lilidebergerac replied to your photoset “These guys are currently sitting in their incubator on my bedroom…”

Can I ask what is your job exactly and how you came to do it? It seems quite awesome, I think I might like working with animals… Anyway, I’m curious. BTW, I’m french, I think you are too but I’m not sure. Well, you can answer in french if you are!

Whaaa? What made you think I’m French? :D I would love to be, but alas, the only French I know is the limited amount I learnt in school and the names of various pastries because I eat a lot of pastries.

I’m a wildlife care assistant for a wildlife rescue charity. I joined as a volunteer; I was looking for something to do in my days off and googled volunteer work in my area. I started with cleaning out cages, sweeping, mopping etc and all that sort of stuff. Now I work in the ICU and on reception taking in the admissions and preparing the animals for examination by the supervisor. The supervisors and the longer-term volunteers have all become my friend group and they’re the ones I hang out with outside of work too. I looove it there.

If you’re interested in doing similar, have a search online for wildlife hospitals/rescue centres in your area. A lot of them are charities and so don’t have the money to pay a lot of staff so rely on volunteers to get the day to day stuff done. If you can get experience under your belt then you can go on to apply for jobs in zoos or animal parks etc. Also domestic rescues/shelters.

kraicha replied to your photoset “Cleaned Petal out today; she’s so bloody naughty. I was in jandals so…”

I’d like to have a job like you.

You can! The answer above yours has some info on how to go about it :) x

plincess-cho asked:

qmi: elementary school au where they're both dweebs

“Whoa are those Yu-Gi-Oh cards?” Kyuhyun shouted and ran across the playground. Zhou Mi quickly shoved the cards into his backpack and glared at the glasses wearing Kyuhyun. “No! Maybe…why do you care anyway?” Kyuhyun pulled out a deck and put his fists in his hips “BecauseI challenge you to a duel!”


1.) Give me a pairing. (block b & suju only)
2.) Give me an AU setting.
3.) I will write you a three-sentence fic.

anonymous asked:

I haven't seen u post stuff in so long! I was starting to worry :( anyways... umm there was this girl here on tumblr that I was following... she killed herself. I messaged her saying I care about her, even though I didn't know her very well, but before she could get it... I was too late. I feel so guilty! what do I do? she's gone...

It’s okay to wonder why: Many suicide victims do not leave a note. Even if they do, you can still struggle with what drove them to the point that they felt this was necessary. Unfortunately, you can’t always get answers, but it’s alright to ask.

It’s alright to be angry: When a drunk driver causes an accident that takes a loved one’s life, you know who to be angry at. When someone commits suicide, though, the person who did it and the victim are the same. Thoughts like “How could she do that to us?” or “Didn’t she care about us?” are extremely common and also perfectly natural.

Blaming yourself is natural (but it’s not your fault): When something tragic happens, we want to believe we could’ve prevented it. This instinct doesn’t pair well with the first bullet on this list. It’s easy to imagine a “what if” scenarios. The problem is that this often only makes us feel worse. While feelings of guilt are totally normal, be aware that ultimately, the choice was theirs and try not to be so hard on yourself.

Unfortunately, there’s no one method for overcoming grief. We all have our own ways of dealing with loss and the case of suicide is no different. 

I was at Derry's foyle bridge today and just underneath the bridge there was a really sad poem written on the wall in marker( this person was obviously contemplating suicide), a lot of people jump off that bridge to their deaths but underneath the poem somebody wrote 'this bridge isn't the answer' this made me sad because I'll never know what that person decided to do, weather they just walked away or weather they did take their own life, anyways the moral of the story is, no matter how down you are or how shit your feeling somebody somewhere cares about you, weather it's a close friend or a complete stranger somebody somewhere cares about you

anonymous asked:

Personally, I don't like any of your answers. I'm scrolling through them and you aren't answering anything heart filled, or meaningful. Your just answering. These people are coming to you for actual responses, and advise; not just 7 word short answers. Atleast pretend you care... That is the point of your group anyway.

I do care and I think people like my advice- that’s why they ask me ;) I’VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT IN MY LIFE AND I GIVE ADVICES FROM MY HEART. You don’t know me so don’t judge me. I love helping others. If you don’t like my blog kindly unfollow me;)

anonymous asked:

Ok so my crush is my best friend and he kissed me the other day and I have no idea what to do?!?! I'm scared that if I see him or talk to him, he will say it was nothing.. When it meant a lot to me... He texted me about an hour ago to see if I could talk to him and I haven't answer because I'm scared:(

ur situation is honestly just like my friend’s oh my god .. i say go talk to him? i mean he’s ur best friend anyway and u gotta face him some time, so whatever happens i believe he cares about u in one way or another :)

I was super nervous and anxious about calling bio mom and called exactly 2 minutes after our agreed upon time. Didn’t want to appear overeager. Or something.

Anyway, she didn’t answer. Of course. Navigating this relationship with Emma’s bio family is so uncomfortable and difficult, more so now that CPS has dropped out of the game and isn’t facilitating. I don’t feel like I was prepared to do this on my own. I hope it gets easier. I have a lot of years left.

anonymous asked:

You really need to hang yourself.

the answer is still no. if i wanted to kill myself i would do it for my own reasons and not because an anon told me too lmao,, anyway who would take care of my guinea pigs. odeta doesnt like other people unless im there to slowly introduce her to them. 

#suicide baiting t// 

xiuminshii asked:

Happy Easter Carin! Can I ask you what products you use on your skin? It looks so clear and even-toned... It's really nice! I struggle with acne here and there (it's not really that bad anymore, I probably shouldn't complain about it), but I'm always careful with products since I've only recently gotten over my bad-skin phase... But anyways, I don't know if you've ever struggled with acne (haven't we all?), but whatever you're doing, it's been working! You always look so ethereal~

thank you!! happy easter to you too! <3
of course, i’ll just post the links to 2 other asks where i’ve answered this before :> you can find the products i use (here) and tips and tricks (here). i really don’t have perfect skin, it’s mostly good bb cream and nice cam settings. i mean i don’t have acne unless i’m sick or super stressed, and i had my teenage acne phase really early, so it’s not bad now… but i really don’t have perfect skin haha. i hope some of these tips or products can help you too!! my skin really got a lot better over the last couple of years when i’ve used/done these things. and thanks again <3