Being a self aware borderline is awful, because you know your symptoms are about to flip the fuck out. The Jaws theme is playing and going too fast to stop. You’re about to break down, lash out, hurt and destroy your relationships, and you’re aware of it, but you can’t do a thing for it.
It’s like being trapped inside a glass house with soundproof walls. You can beat on the glass and shout as much as you want that you don’t want to do this, that you know it’s upsetting both yourself and everyone around you, but you can’t stop it.
this is all @mistystarshine‘s fault for saying yoriko would want to dress up as beatrice in like one of the only fictional things she actually takes an interest in and naturally i was like “shit this means kira would HAVE to be the Other Cat Based Murder Villain, bernkastel” so (i macguyvered together a version of bern’s outfit that kira might actually wear because hes not going anywhere dressed as a small victorian doll)