but youre keeping me here

Just a reminder that I’m an Adult™ and if that makes you feel uncomfortable feel free to:

  • unfollow me
  • ask me to unfollow you
  • block me

I won’t get mad or anything. It’s important to make sure you feel comfortable and secure.

3

Hey hey hey, @lanceweek​ Day 1 is here !  Inner Space/Outer Space.

Well i bet now you know how weak I am ? I couldn’t miss an occasion to draw Blue with her paladin 💙 

You are amazing

It doesn’t matter what you’re going through, you are stronger than you realise and whatever crap is happening in your life right now… Now matter how big or how bad, it will pass. It may not seem like it. There may seem like there is only one way out.. But there isn’t. Life isn’t easy and it isn’t straightforward, but what is meant to happen will happen and all you can do is get through it and try your best. No one can ask for anything other than your best, and if you have days when you can’t do your best then that’s ok too.

If anyone who reads this needs someone to talk to then please know my ask and inbox are always open and I will do my best to help, whether you need to rant, cry or scream, I will help in whatever way I can.

Keep your head up

read tags for caption | twitter

bosstoaster  asked:

Microprompt: Smol Shiro gets Big Doge

me: okay phew, I finally finished all the smol!Shiro prompts in my inbox.
@bosstoaster: ….did you now.

thanks a LOT, TOASTER.

“That’s a baby yupper,” Coran whispers, horrified.

“Shiro,” Keith says, aiming for calm. His voice is shaking as he takes a careful step foward, holding out his hand. “Step away from the dog, please.”

“But he’s so fluffy,” Shiro pouts. His little hand continues to pet the giant pupper - yupper? - carefully near its neck, which is as high as small Shiro can reach. The pup - no, the alien dog - towers over him. It’s easily three times as big as Shiro is, and it is huge. “Can we keep him? Please?”

“Come back over here and we’ll talk about it,” Lance tries.

In response the alien dog opens its mouth, displaying rows and rows of sharp pointy teeth. Both Lance and Keith lurch forwards in alarm, but the yupper merely uses its long tongue to lick fully half of Shiro’s face. Shiro shrieks but it’s with delight, his little floof of hair standing straight up from the yupper’s saliva. “He likes me! He’s so friendly, please? Can we? Please?”

Because of my drawings, many people on Tumblr asked me, if I wanted to join them on Dead by Daylight.
It’s very cute, but please don’t expect me to be much of a help for your team, cause I’m still rank 20 and just so super bad at this game. Q7q well… I just play for the fun and for the characters. (Btw my first sketch of Meg and Dwight q7q)

black magic [m]

credit: x.

❛❛im one of the brightest witches at this prestigious magic academy and ur a human who somehow got admitted and everyone knows u dont ACTUALLY have magic but cant prove it so they hate u for it but i actually like you??? and have a crush on u??????? our paths have just never crossed until ur class blew up n somehow we became class partners and– hold on what do you mean we fucked up this spell so we wanna fuck each other’s brains out??❜❜ AU

COUNT → 18.430

GENRE → smut 

PAIRING → taehyung | reader

WARNINGS → dom and sub tones | mild cum play | explicit language | female masturbation (male if you squint) | oral sex | penetration | graphic dirty talk

NOTE → this was requested and inspired by @blueagust!!!!!! the idea went thru several stages and yelling over kkt but this is the final product :-D im sorry mom


You hated everyone at this fucking academy.

It wasn’t just that they always smelled like unicorn turds—and that wasn’t a compliment because unicorns had the nastiest smelling shit in the entire universe—but they were so arrogant and had this fucking superiority complex when it came to humans. You were sure if they actually lived with them and in human society instead of hidden away at some prestigious academy they wouldn’t pull this bullshit in the first place, but they still despised them.

Or maybe it was just one human they despised in particular.

Keep reading

okay so i was having thoughts this morning about how i believe that obi-wan was probably t h e best master for anakin under the circumstances (and a few others) and how as much as i hate predestination, if you accept anakin as (one of?) the chosen one(s), then he is fated to bring about the fall of the Jedi - cos you can’t have balance when the lightside outnumbers the darkside by as much as it does. and i started thinking about how what if the universes where obi-wan is his master greatly delays him fucking off to the darkside and bringing about the end of the Order? well, he was all of 23 when that happened, which means in other universes, where obi-wan is not his master, he probably abandons the order much younger than that.

okay, so - an au where.

an au where qui-gon lives. despite reasons why it probably wouldn’t happen, he becomes anakin’s master, obi-wan fucks off to do Knight Things and Grow As His Own Person. anakin has his canonical crisis of faith and great realization that being a jedi is difficult and not actually all that he thought it was going to be. he fucks off from the order - say around the age of fifteen?

qui-gon, despite everything, goes off to hunt him. despite this “betrayal”. after all, anakin is the chosen one, right? so he even goes so far as to call in obi-wan to help him find anakin. meanwhile, anakin is employing every last trick in the book to remain out of reach. he won’t go back - he won’t. he can do more good out there in the galaxy, instead of tied down by the (hostile, tbh) jedi order.

it just so happens that obi-wan finds him. rather than try to arrest him or anything (leaving the order is not a ‘take into custody’ offense, as obi-wan well knows) and actually talks to anakin about the reasons why he’s fucked off. he finds the reasons understandable. besides, becoming a jedi is not being conscripted. anakin has the right to leave if he feels like it. obi-wan tells him that it’s fucking dangerous for a half-trained force sensitive out there in the wild galaxy, but when anakin doesn’t change his mind (because he’s hella stubborn tbh) obi-wan is just like “welp” and lets him go. he tells qui-gon he never found anakin, but that it’s really unreasonable to hunt the kid down for fucking off. it’s another thing that qui-gon and obi-wan don’t see eye-to-eye with.

so that’s that, right? they’ll never see the chosen one again.

but wait, there’s more. So of course the Sith find anakin. he must bring balance to the force. Dooku and Sidious play bad cop/good cop until anakin is firmly under Sidious’ thumb. (presumably, Qui-gon would have found nine hundred different ways to keep anakin away from palpatine, who might even have been the one to plant the idea of running off into anakin’s head on the few times when he was allowed to speak with the kid). anakin goes corrupt, as you do when siths are fucking with your head, and the story proceeds.

here it is, the fall of the jedi order, and order 66.

ymmv what happens to qui-gon. does he live through even this? or is he shot down protecting obi-wan? in either case, obi-wan survives as he tends to, trying to regroup with the rest of the surviving Jedi. of course, you have this wretched sith lord, Darth Vader, hunting them all down. his skill with a blade is unparalleled. no jedi who has faced him has survived.

when he finds them, obi-wan stays back, sacrificing himself to save the others. and yet, to his surprise, darth vader does not kill him. darth vader himself does not understand entirely why, only that once when he was very young, a jedi heard him out and let him go.

he does not let obi-wan go, but neither does his blade fall.

I don’t wanna see one bad word about Kai or Krystal, I’m not here for it, you’ll get blocked, your sad delusional thoughts can be somebody elses problem because I haven’t got time for it.

And so it was that The Joshua Tree 2017 Tour started with Larry No Fucks Given Mullen Jr strutting down the catwalk like a motherfucker. And so it also was that Larry No Fucks Given Mullen Jr ignored the crowd as he went, giving no fucks as he proceeded to slam out the intro to Sunday Bloody Sunday like the cool motherfucker that he is. I Love You, Larry No Fucks.

Perks of Dating a Necromancer

(because I had this conversation with my friend and I feel like I should post this here)

1. Skeleton War will be an actual thing.

2. Your pet is dead? Not for long!

3. Receiving creepily adorable Valentine’s Day presents (eg. “Human blood is red, but some of their veins are blue. Last year I gave you my heart, so this year I’ll give you two.”)

4. Death puns.

5. You’ll be totally safe during a zombie apocalypse thanks to “Control Undead”

6. You’re dating someone who is totally capable of creating an invincible army of undead. I mean, come on.

7. UNDEAD DRAGONS.

8. They’re great if you need to hide a body.

9. Skeleton puns.

10. They’re massive help if you’re struggling with biology..

11. They can fix that poor little dead bird you found yesterday at the park.

12. “‘Till death do us part” no longer applies.

13. Neither does ‘YOLO’

14. They usually dress in black, so if you like that too, you can steal their clothes if you want. (oversized hoodies that smell a little like death, but only a little ftw)

15. They can make a few skeletons/zombies do a wide variety of silly dances to cheer you up.

16. Halloween.

17. They may tell you what happens after death.

18. Hearing them do an impression of Frankenstein when raising the dead. (”IT’S ALIIIIIIIIIIIVE”)

19. You know the skeleton rave from the music video of “Hey Girls, Hey Boys” by Chemical Brothers? Yeah.

20. Watching horror movies together and hearing them complain about how such-and-such is a wrong way to raise the dead, and anyway that’s not how the human skeleton works etc. etc.

21. “Are you a graveyard? Because I’m dead inside and want to bury myself in you.”

22. The whole ‘skulls, bones and old books’ aesthetic

23. Want to meet J.R.R Tolkien? Terry Pratchett? Christopher Lee? No problem!

24. The same as above, but with family members.

25. Hearing random facts about the human body/bones/life/death etc. everyday.

26. They can probably bring back extinct animals as long as they have the skeletons (I think)

27. “Jurassic Park: Skeleton Edition”. Only the dinosaurs aren’t trying to kill you.

28. Quiet walks through the graveyards.

29. Throwing a mini zombie apocalypse on Halloween and/or April Fools.

30. Since they stay among the dead for so long, they usually appreciate any living creature staying close to them. (ie. extremely adorable cuddling sessions. Necromancers make the best cuddlers, shut up.)

2

Y/N: how long until you think they’ll find me?
C: they won’t, ain’t no one taking my girl from.
I: you know I say you just turn yourself in it was a petty crime, the worst they’ll do is make you pay for what you stole, maybe give you community service work.
C: Ian you’re no help.
Y/N: it’s already been 24 hours I’m sure they’ll just give up and count their losses.
C: just stay lowkey here for awhile. *kisses your neck*
Y/N: does staying lowkey mean you’re keeping me here to have sex with you?
C: no baby…
Y/N: *glares*
C: ok yes it does. *pouts*
Y/N: I never said I have a problem with that.

-requested by anon
-not my gif