but you wear it pretty well dude

Beanies and Negotiations (Part 2)

Originally posted by dailycwriverdale

Part one here

Anon requests: Could you PLEASE do a second part for beanies and negotiations?! I loved it!!

Another part for beanies and negotiations! Puh-lease

Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Description: Archie observes Jughead and (Y/N)’s relationship, and realizes it’s not just his beanie that Jughead lets (Y/N) wear

Warnings: none

Word count: 1,033

A/N: ah you guys I’m so happy you’re enjoying my writing! I wasn’t planning on writing a second part for this piece, but since it was requested I wrote it for you guys. I was also gonna queue this and have it published later, but I’m so excited for you guys to read this! Enjoy!


Although he and Jughead had recently hit a rough patch in their relationship, Archie Andrews considered himself one of Jughead’s closest friends.  He also liked to believe that he knew his friend pretty well.  So when he saw (Y/N) roaming the halls wearing Jughead’s beanie, he was ecstatic.  He rushed through the school to find his friend.  In the lounge, Jughead stood with his arms crossed and raven hair exposed.

“Dude!” Archie exclaimed as he sauntered over to Jughead.  “Finally!”

“What are you talking about?” Jughead questioned, eyes narrowed.

“(Y/N), of course!” Archie answered.  “You asked her out, right?”  Jughead shifted and uncrossed his arms.

“No,” he scoffed, but his voice wavered a bit.  “Why would you think that?”

“Because she’s wearing your beanie,” Archie stated like it was obvious.  “The last time you took that thing off is when you proposed to her when we were six.”

“We were six,” Jughead emphasized, slightly leaning forward.

“But you like her,” Archie said.  Jughead opened his mouth to reply, but no smart remarks came out.  Instead, he closed his mouth and looked away from Archie, sighing.  “Ask her out, man.”  Pursing his lips, Jughead shook his head and walked away.  Archie sighed and turned around, spotting Veronica and Betty waving at him.

“Archie!” Veronica called, beckoning him over.  He moved to the couch they were sitting at and stood in front of the two girls.

“Yes?”

“You’ve seen (Y/N) wearing Jughead’s hat, too, right?” she asked.  Archie nodded.

“I don’t get it though,” he said.  “He never takes that thing off.  I asked Jughead if he asked her out, but he said no.  I figured she’d be wearing it because of that, since last time she wore Jughead’s beanie-”

“He proposed to her,” Betty finished, and Archie nodded.  All three of them simultaneously sighed.

“God he looked so smitten yesterday,” Veronica groaned.  Archie sent her a questioning look.  “Betty and I were at Pop’s yesterday, and we saw Jughead and (Y/N) there.  She had stolen his beanie and he was trying to get it back, but he was enjoying it. I swear he could barely contain his smile.”

“Yeah,” Betty smiled in agreement.  “They’re both smitten.”


Archie, Betty, and Veronica thought that the beanie incident was a one-time thing.  However, they were proven wrong when they spotted (Y/N) sitting in Pop’s wearing Jughead’s jacket a week later.

“Hey, (Y/N),” Veronica greeted, sitting down next to her.  “Where’s Jughead?”

“Working at the drive-in tonight,” (Y/N) answered, smiling.  Betty and Archie slid into the booth seat across from them.  

“Is that Jughead’s jacket?” Archie bluntly asked.  (Y/N) looked down at what she was wearing.

“Oh crap!” she exclaimed. “I forgot to give this back to him!” Veronica smirked.

“I’m sure he wouldn’t mind you holding onto it for a bit,” she laughed, causing (Y/N) to smile and nod.

“Why’d he give it to you in the first place?” Betty inquired.  (Y/N) bit her lip.

“We were walking home from school, and I had forgotten my jacket at home.  I was shivering, and Jug insisted that I took his,” she explained. Archie affectionately rolled his eyes, smirking.

“Smitten,” he mumbled under his breath.


The next incident was two weeks later at a football game.  (Y/N) had promised her friends that she would come to the game to support them, and she managed to drag Jughead along with her.  Archie smirked when he saw them sitting together in the stands, knowing that it probably wasn’t too hard for (Y/N) to convince Jughead to come.

After the game, (Y/N) and Jughead got off the bleachers and walked over to the field where Archie, Betty, and Veronica were standing.

“You guys were all great tonight!” (Y/N) complimented, beaming at her friends.  They all smiled in gratitude, when suddenly Archie furrowed his eyebrows.

“Is that-” he paused for a moment, contemplating how to phrase his question.  “Is that a new flannel?”  Betty and Veronica shot him confused looks, whereas Jughead and (Y/N)’s fidgeted as their cheeks grew red.

“Uh, nope,” (Y/N) awkwardly laughed.  “It’s Jughead’s actually.”

“What?” Betty and Veronica exclaimed at the same time.  Archie suppressed a smirk.

“It was raining before,” (Y/N) stated, and Archie noticed Jughead refusing to make eye contact with him, “and we got drenched because neither of us had an umbrella.  Jughead had a dry flannel and let me wear it.” She shrugged at the end of her explanation, playing with the sleeves of Jughead’s flannel.  Archie was tempted to ask (Y/N) why she didn’t just change into some of her own clothes, but he decided not to for her and Jughead’s sakes. Betty and Veronica shared a knowing glance.  Finally, Archie managed to catch Jughead’s eye.  He smirked and Jughead rolled his eyes, but the small smile on his face didn’t go unnoticed by Archie.


Archie would have completely missed the last incident if it wasn’t for Veronica.  Some weeks later they were sitting at lunch with (Y/N), waiting for Betty and Jughead to arrive at their table.

“(Y/N), that sweater is really big on you,” Veronica noted, critiquing her outfit.  “Please tell me you didn’t just buy that.”  (Y/N) smiled bashfully.

“No,” she responded, “I’ve had it lying in my room for a while.  Figured I should put it to use.”  Veronica scrunched up her nose.

“You shouldn’t have. Not to be rude, girl, but green is not your color.”

“Oh well,” (Y/N) laughed. “I’ll remember that next ti-”

“That’s Jughead’s, isn’t it?” Archie interrupted.  (Y/N) bit her lip and pulled the sweater sleeves over her hands.

“Maybe,” she mumbled, looking down into her lap.  Archie and Veronica smirked.

“You know what, (Y/N)?” Veronica said.  “Never mind what I just said.  That does suit you.”  (Y/N)’s cheeks grew bright red.

“Oh god, guys,” she moaned, but they could hear the smile in her face.  Jughead and Betty soon walked over to the table and joined the group.  During their lunch, Archie would occasionally glance over at Jughead and (Y/N).  He frequently saw one staring at the other.  Smiling at his friends, Archie couldn’t fathom how neither of them realize how smitten they were with each other.  

It all started with that damn beanie.

Part 3 here   Part 4 here

Oops……..dick slip. Another unintentional dick slip in a public place that I was able to document for you guys. I’m positive this guy was totally Unaware his penis was showing. Pretty circumcised penis dude. Thanks for not wearing Underwear under those short shorts we gay guys love you for it. It still amazes how often this actually unintentionally happens every day when you’re actually looking for it. You will find thay It happens everywhere if your looking for it. As you know I’m always looking for it and I do well documenting it for all of you. And now that short shorts are back in and more guys than ever go without underwear it’s easier than ever to find these unintentional dick slips. Yahoo!

Hoodie - Paul Lahote

Pairing: Paul Lahote x Reader

Characters: Paul Lahote, Jacob Black, Embry Call, Quil Ateara

Warnings: N/A

Request: “Please tell me this is safe” “This is safe” “Please tell me this is safe, without lying” “You’re really demanding,
you know that?

Word Count: 477

Author: Hannah

Keep reading

3

Do you know @serilia-night ? You totally should dude, their fashion sense is amazing! (well except at home they just wear sweatpants but they look pretty darn good in those too)seriously, they somehow always know which colors go together c: Anyway, i hope you like this semishira pic! I know it isn’t totally in character but shirabu looks like he could be this sweet cx 

Once Upon a Dream

in which Annabeth was dared to kiss a blue-eyed stranger just when the fireworks start

Words: 2,142

Warnings: None.


               She’s going to regret this.

               Annabeth is so going to regret this.

               She’s in Disneyland with her friends, it’s night time, the fireworks are just about to start, and she did the stupid mistake of telling Piper that she’s always wanted to kiss someone in Disneyland with fireworks and Cinderella’s castle in the background.

               So now Piper dared her to do exactly that – kiss someone just when the fireworks start. And if there’s one thing Annabeth hates even more than doing dares, it’s backing out of them.

               To make matters worse, Piper gets to choose which guy Annabeth gets to ask (and kiss). It’s not that Piper has bad taste in men – it’s just that Piper, well. She’s Piper.

               She is so going to regret this.

               “Piper, I –“

               “I know you’re not backing out of this, Annabeth. I know you. Right, Jason? Annabeth won’t be backing out of this. Right?” Piper turned to her boyfriend, smiling sweetly enough to scare him.

               “Uh, yeah,” he scratches the back of his neck, trying to avoid Annabeth’s glare. “Annabeth doesn’t back down.” He shoots her an apologetic look before looking away once more.

               “What’s happening here?” Leo walks up next to Annabeth with a curious glimmer in his eye, licking a Mickey-shaped popsicle.

               “Annabeth dreams of kissing someone in Disneyland and we’re going to help her fulfill that.” Piper beams, practically jumping up and down out of excitement. She starts to sings Once Upon a Dream, which Annabeth doesn’t really deem appropriate for the situation.

               “Well, you can always kiss me, Annabeth.” He spreads his arms wide open, smiling brightly and wagging his eyebrows up and down, his popsicle melting and dripping to the floor.

               Before Annabeth can even think of where to hit him – stomach or groin – Piper butts in. “She’ll only be kissing a stranger, Leo, and besides – I already know who it’ll be.”

Keep reading

The Lazy Bastard’s Guide to Beating Rune Prana.

So this post is basically a somewhat short guide for those out there who, like me, did not have their shit together in this game but still want to get the best ending without having to kill themselves.

Hello there,… you! Tell me, would you like to beat the third arc of Rune Factory 4? You would? Well, let me ask you a few questions: Are your crafting and forging levels at at least 80? If not, did you know you can use the Heart Pendant to make yourself gain skill exp just a liiiiiittle faster? Is Frey/Lest at least level 130? Do you have equips that boost your stats into the thousands? Specifically, do you have equips such as Diamond Brooch, Wet Boots, and Rosary? Do you have the most holy and almighty and revered crafting items, the Racoon Leaves and Glitta Augite? Did you go to Sharance Maze and run around endlessly until you picked up high level weapons?

…No? Well… you are aware that this is the advice everyone will give you, correct? You must be frustrated. Everywhere you go, these are the only things anyone will tell you. And none of it’s working, and you know why. Because you don’t have the time or patience to get your crafting skills that high, even with the Heart Pendant. Because you’re at a low level because you keep dying in dungeons and potions are too expensive and you’re trying to save food items for the really hard parts of the game. You’re too poor to afford good equips, and not motivated enough to make them. Racoon Leaves and Glitta Augites are a mystery; even if you know where to get them, you can’t use them because once again, your crafting levels suck. You may or may not have Sharance Maze, but it’s a confusing place for you.

Well, you’re in luck! Yes, you heard me, in luck! Because I’m about to tell you something wonderful: ALL IT TAKES TO BEAT THIS GAME IS 3000 PRINCE(SS) POINTS, A LOVE POTION AND OBJECT X YOU WILL PICK UP FROM THE GROUND, A GRILLED SNAPPER, A TALISMAN YOU GET FROM A TOWN EVENT, AND A BOTTLE OF OIL OR TWO.

I’M SERIOUS. Here’s how it works: 

  • You’re going to use those 3000 Prince(ss) points to open up Sharance Maze, and guess what? You’re going to run around a bunch! Yes, this will be slightly annoying, but if you’re worried about dying you can take some party members with you. I hope you at least have a fairy rescued from a previous dungeon and the wolf from Sechs Territory to distract enemies. Now I’ll admit, this is basically the hardest part. Since you know you will die easily even with party members, you’re going to be warping out and then running right back in a lot. 
  • But the point of that is this: not to find good weapons, but first and foremost items. And not food either. The Love Potion and Object X you need can be found when you run around Sharance Maze, and they show up fairly often. I came across like 4 of each fairly easily, but you’ll only need one Love Potion and maybe 2 or 3 Object Xs.
  • First thing first: once you’ve got that Love Potion, WARP HOME AND SAVE ASAP. Next, find yourself a Dark Fairy. They’re large and purple. Now, you can also use Princess points to display enemy HP and Level, so I suggest you do that so that you know you’re nabbing a high-leveled one. This little trick worked on the first try for me. All you gotta do is find a Dark Fairy (in Sharance Maze of course, shoot for one that’s near level 300) and just chuck that potion at her! She (no pun intended) loves it to bits, and will gladly join you. Her stats? Through the fuckin roof. She’s twice as powerful as Venti. Yeah that’s right.
  • Next: do you have a dish called Grilled Snapper? Check your fridge: if you don’t have one there, don’t panic. They aren’t that hard to get, because if you’re pals with Porcoline, he gives you one on your birthday! There’s also a chance Porcoline may sell this dish at his restaurant, but I think to cook it you need to be level 51 on cooking, which you probably aren’t. No biggie. At the most, you just have to wait till your next birthday. ONCE YOU GET THE FISH DISH, SAAAAAAVE. Now this part oughta look familiar; guess where you’re going? That’s right, Sharance Maze again! Wheeeee! This time, your mission is to find a Minotaur King; (preferably near level 300) they’re super huge blue monster dudes that wear loincloths and carry frikkin huge axes. Scary. Go ahead and bring your Dark Fairy on this mission so she can help you fight/stay alive til ya find the big guy. Once you’ve found him, toss him the Grilled Snapper. Worked on the first try for me! This guy is just as suped-up as the Dark Fairy, but his physical attack is about 2k higher.

Wow, isn’t that amazing?! Now you’ve two extremely high-leveled party members! And guess what? That means pretty much everything from here is gonna be a cakewalk! …Well, except for a few more things, mostly regarding your equips. Don’t worry, it’s simple stuff.

  • Next is the Talisman. Now normally, this takes a crafting level of about 70 to make. And I have some good news and bad news. The good news is, you can get this item for free! …The bad news is, I’m not exactly sure if I remember where exactly I got it. But I’m pretty sure– like 90% sure– it comes from Margaret’s Event: A Performance Without an Audience. You can unlock this even if you play as a girl, so don’t worry. Anyways, complete that little event, and grab the Talisman. It will be a lifesaver when you get to places where you get poisoned. Since the Talisman reverses status effects, the icon above your head will say you’re poisoned, but it’ll actually be healing you. So once you get this thing, be sure to always have it in your inventory, especially for the Beach Area of Rune Prana and the Cave Area.
  • Now, for the strangest item on this list; that’s right, the bottle(s) of oil. You’ve got the Object X, right? Maybe even more than one? Good, because here we go. See, in various parts of Rune Prana, especially early on, there are some: enemies that throw powerful fireballs, a volcano area where some maps deal constant fire damage, and even some flame-shooting pillars and, at one point, a literal ring of fire that can and probably will instant death you. That’s where object X and Oil come in. Here’s how it works: If you look at the description of Oil, you’ll see it says “-31 resistance to fire”. Meaning, your fire resistance goes down about 30 percent if you use this in item upgrading. HOWEVER, Object X makes this a good thing! Why? Because, when used as an upgrading tool, Object X will REVERSE the effects of EVERY SUBSEQUENT ITEM USED TO UPGRADE AN EQUIP.  Meaning, you can take an equip of your choice, and where you would usually upgrade it with an item like a gem or root or whatever, put Object X instead! Then, you can upgrade the equip yet again with the Oil, thereby RAISING your fire resistance!  BEWARE, THIS IS IRREVERSIBLE. THE EFFECT OF OBJECT X AS A REVERSER WILL PERMANENTLY PERSIST ON ALL FUTURE UPGRADES OF THIS ITEM.  Anyways, I went ahead and applied this to my Platinum Mail and my hat, bringing my fire resistance up to over 60. It has literally saved my life.

Once that is done, you’re ready for Rune Prana! You’ll be impervious to poison, damn near impervious to fire, and you have two powerhouses who will quite literally be fighting all your battles for you. (Heads up, you can ride the Minotaur if you want to control him, and he’ll take all the damage so you don’t die super fast).

As far as actually getting through the floors/puzzles and such, there are other guides for that. Bring plenty of food/potions, and remember to save often. Hope you like being the healer, ‘cause that’s pretty much your job now!

Sonic vs. Knuckles..? (Original and Roommates AU)

Kevin (Sonic):“YOU LOOK LIKE A GIRL,MOTHERFUCKER!”

Hunter (Knuckles):“WELL YOU LOOK LIKE POOP,SHITHEAD!”

Miles (Tails):“Err..okay guys those were pretty lame–”

Kevin (Sonic):“RED!”

Hunter (Knuckles):“BLUE!”

Miles (Tails):“Dudes..stop holy Chaos–”

Hunter (Knuckles):“YELLOW!!”

Kevin (Sonic):“PINK!!”

Miles (Tails):“OH MY GOD–”

No explanation, got bored. Sorry ;3;

Like,Reblog(mostly), and Share(this too) if you liked it! 8D

4

Hillel – animated, intelligent, handsome – this dude really had it going on. His Slovakian length served him well both in limb and face. He looks like he’s still having fun – hasn’t reached that point of ‘Oh please not another picture.’ You know when we started taking pictures it was so fun and creative – after about 20,000 photo sessions it is very difficult to maintain enthusiasm. I think a big reason we started getting so heavy into contorning and distorting ourselves is that it was a reaction to these pretty boys in the music scene, these guys wearing makeup and trying to look as handsome and beautiful as possible. We always were trying to look like a cover of Mad Magazine.  – Anthony Kiedis

Shadowhunters/Pjo Headcanon just randomly popped up in my mind:

So, imagine Solangelo and Malec are like shopping and Will and Magnus trying to get their boyfriends into the changing rooms and both are like “NO BITCH”. After they finally got them there they sit outside, kinda happy with themselfes until Magnus is like:

Magnus: Man you have no idea how it is to have a boyfriend who refuses to wear something else than black.

Will: Belive me dude, I know exactly what you are talking about.

Magnus: Are you serious?!

Will: Yeah, he nearly bit me while I was trying to talking him into a shirt.

Magnus: Mine told me he was going to shoot me with his arrows.

Will: Well that sounds kind of nice doesn’t it? *wink wonk*

Magnus: HELL nO LIKE HE TaLKS ABouT ArROWS LIKE PAInFUL ONeS


They start to have the best conversation of the week with each other about their adorable dorky awkward boyfriend until they realize that they stand right in front of them with pretty colorful clothing and a quite unhappy face.

Nico: You were talking about us?
Will: Ohhhhh baby…hi…eh this is Magnus he is here with his boyfriend Al-
Nico: Yes I know, Alec and I got the time to talk a little while you were talking about our ‘aweful’ fashiontaste
Alec: *Stares angry to Magnus*
Magnus: *mumbles* gonna shoot me with his arrows…

Mystic Messenger Update: Secret Endings

You know, when I started this Odyssey I thought I’d get a cute dating sim. I was not expecting this to consume my life the way it has. For all three of you who actually read these updates, thanks for your patience.

Needless to say (but let’s say it anyway) this entire thing is all spoilers.

Secret Ending the First:

Well I am sad Saeyoung and I didn’t get to go to the party, especially given his awesome formal wear. Then again we do get to go rescue his brother from Vanderwood and have lots of Mint Eye shenanigans, which are pretty much my favorite.

Also gotta say I really dig Vanderwood’s style. Also love how obstinate Saeran is about not wearing his damn coat. Dude got a giant tattoo of his cult and he is going to show it off, dammit!

So once we get to Mint Eye the heartbreak starts. I wasn’t particularly surprised that Rika was alive, that she was involved with Unknown, or that V was wrapped up in all this; but I was surprised by how much power she has over V and the abusive nature of their relationship.

Because here’s the thing: I spent most of this game really annoyed with V. He was obviously hiding something about Mint Eye and given the shit that went down in this game he also really owes everyone an explanation. So much of this could have been avoided if he had only confessed what was happening and sought help from his friends. It was really obvious and really frustrating.

But we also see how his complete devotion to Rika-quite literally-blinded him. We see how she emotionally manipulates the guy with these weird “if you loved me you’d let me blind you” games. And how at the end of the day, he’s the victim of abuse.

And then at the end…man, poor V. He really deserved better.

I quite liked everyone reacting to his death. Especially Jumin’s understandable anger. Poor guy.

As for Rika, well I knew no one who wears that much yellow and that many bows can be innocent.

In all seriousness I really hated how the game portrays mental illness. Everyone

in this goddamn game is in desperate need of therapy and the only one who actually goes ends up being the big bad? Come on now.

They keep the details of her diagnosis pretty hush-hush but anxiety, depression, and paranoia? I suffer from anxiety, depression, and paranoia (among other things) and not once, not once, have I considered drugging my friends and brainwashing them to my idea of happiness.

Admittedly I have considered starting a cult and wearing nothing but vaguely ecclesiastical robes, but who among us hasn’t?

Seems like they were just blaming her actions on the ableist boogeyman of mental illness. We can’t judge or try to understand because Rika’s crazy! That’s also why we can’t bring her to justice!

And then there’s poor Saeran. Now, given Saeyoung’s first bad ending I’m pretty cool towards him, but man, what a poor kid. I still don’t quite see how brainwashing and torturing this guy helped advance Mint Eye, especially when they could have taken Saeyoung as a boy instead of sending him to the agency, but I guess that’s why I’m not a criminal mastermind.

Secret Ending the Second

So now, finally Saeran is in the hospital. For the first time in this damn game someone’s getting psychiatric treatment. And I respect Saeyoung’s decision not to force medication on his brother. Given the way Rika drugged Saeran it would be downright monstrous to do the same thing all over again. That said, he still needs professional help. I get that Saeyoung doesn’t want the stigma of mental illness on his brother, but dude, you can’t love someone out of trauma. Learn from V’s mistakes.

I also really didn’t approve of how Juman, Jaehee, and Saeyoung kept the truth from Zen and Yoosung. You’d think we would have learned that constructing these labyrinths of lies (or lie-byrinths as I like to call ‘em) is a bad idea. You’d think we would have learn to trust in our fellow RFA members, but I guess that’s just too much to ask.

So we these nerds rushing Rika out of the country. I also have to wonder what happened to the rest of Mint Eye, I mean, she had a fucking compound, where in the world are the rest of her brainwashed buddies? Are they languishing in some hospital? Are they on some Alaska wilderness resort? How does an operation the size of Mint Eye just fade away like that?

And like several of the other endings I was pretty disturbed by how quickly Saeyoung and the player commit to each other. Guys, I just joined your secret society and freed my beau’s brother from a cult a few months ago, let’s slow the fuck down. I guess it falls into this popular romantic narrative where you have One True Love and you gotta commit fast otherwise it’s not real. Really creeped me out.

The ending was overall pretty bittersweet, heavy on the bitter. Sure Mint Eye’s gone and you’re in love; but V’s dead, Rika’s almost catatonic, Vanderwood and Saeyoung have to give up their identities, Saeran is dealing with who knows what kind of fallout, both Zen and Yoosung are still being kept from the truth.

Honestly that last picture kind of said it all. The player, Saeyoung, and Zen are the only people who look happy. Jumin and Jaehee are look like they’re at an acquaintance’s funeral, Yoosung just looks really down, and Saeran is freaking haunted.

I love this game, I really do, but man, that is an intense ending. I really want more.

Oh well, onto the specials.

Girl meets the one with more secrets
  • <p> <b>Lucas:</b> (quietly talking to Farkle) How could you tell her?!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> I had to! We're getting married! Couples can't keep secrets from one another!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Well, I guess Riley should know about Atlantic city!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> DU-UUUDE!!<p/><b>Maya:</b> What happened in Atlantic city?<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Farkle and I are in a bar...<p/><b>Farkle:</b> Did you not hear me say "DU-UUUDE"?!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> ...and this girl is making eyes at him. After a while he goes over to her, and a minute later I see them kissing. Now you're thinking "Farkle's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls!" And you're right, he's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls! (Widen his eyes).<p/><b>Maya:</b> You kissed a guy?!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> I laughed so hard...<p/><b>Farkle:</b> ...that we had to throw out your underwear again?<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Whatever, dude! You kissed a guy!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> In college, Lucas used to wear leg warmers.<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Farkle entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and won!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> Lucas came in fourth and cried!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Hey! I welled up!<p/><b></b> (Riley is laughing hard).<p/><b>Lucas:</b> You find that funny? Maybe Farkle should know some of your secrets!<p/><b>Riley:</b> I already told him everything! You shush!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Once, Riley was sent to her room without dinner, so she ate the macaroni off a jewelry box she made!<p/><b>Riley:</b> Lucas used to stay home every Saturday night to watch Cuddle Bunnies.<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Riley couldn't tell time till she was 13!<p/><b>Riley:</b> It's hard for some people!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> Of course it is! (Secretly backs off and mouths 'whoa').<p/><b>Riley:</b> Farkle once wore my underwear to work!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> HEY!!<p/><b>Riley:</b> I'm sorry. I couldn't think of any more for Lucas!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> In college, Farkle got drunk and slept with the lady who cleaned our dorm!<p/><b>Farkle:</b> That was you!<p/><b>Lucas:</b> Whatever, dude! You kissed a guy!<p/></p>

anonymous asked:

OMG I SAW YOUR PHOTO FIC AND I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING!!! I want to see how the Miracles will react when they find out (which will probably happen sooner than later). I get the feeling that this will end with the Miracles with their own group photo in their own set of t-shirts as insisted by the Miracle Boyfriends Club lololol

Kuroko finds the shirt when he does the laundry.

He looks at the shirt for longer than he should, because Kagami walks in and finds him like that. “Kuroko, do you—ack!” Kagami moves with the instincts of a seasoned athlete and grabs the shirt out of Kuroko’s hands before Kuroko can pull back.

“Kagami-kun, you are so shameless, I had no idea,” Kuroko says passively.

“It’s not what you think! It’s not mine!”

“It belongs to someone else who is dating a Miracle, then?” Kuroko inquires, politely.

“I mean it’s,” Kagami flushes, “OK, it’s mine, but it was all Takao’s fault. He made it.”

“I see,” Kuroko says. He tries to picture Kagami in the shirt (and finds that he actually really wants to see Kagami in the shirt), “That color would not go well with your hair at all.”

“I know, shut up.” Kagami scrunches up the shirt into a ball and refuses to meet his gaze. “I wanted a black one.”

Which, Kuroko notes, is not the same thing as not wanting to wear the shirt at all. A flush of warmth spreads through his body, and Kuroko is pretty sure he can convince Kagami to wear the shirt for him after all.

*

Kise finds the shirt on accident, when he’s rifling through Kasamatsu’s dresser. (He’s run out of clothes, and he really hates doing laundry and loves wearing Kasamatsu’s clothes, so really, it only makes sense to combine these two things by picking through Kasamatsu’s shirts).

It’s in the very back of the bottom drawer, shoved into the corner, and when Kise finds it he makes an inhaling, gasping, squealing noise that must sound very alarming because Kasamatsu comes storming in, “Oi, Kise, what’s wrong—oh, crap.”

Senpai,” Kise breathes, “Please put this on, please, please.”

“Not even in your wildest fantasy,” Kasamatsu says.

“This is definitely going in my fantasies,” Kise agrees. “Please, wear it just once, I will do anything, anything, if you put this on. Any demeaning, most depraved thing you might want, I will do it.”

And to Kise’s surprise, Kasamatsu actually pauses and thinks it over. Kise thinks he might actually die from a combination of happiness and lack of oxygen.

Kasamatsu snatches the shirt from Kise’s hands while he’s distracted.

“Senpai,” Kise pouts.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Kasamatsu says. “The next time I need you to do something.”

“Wha—what’d you say?”

But Kasamatsu has already left, his ears faintly red.

*

Takao plans very strategically for the reveal. He waits for a time when his mom and sister will be out of the house (they’re at MM Land, with Dr. Kishitani and Naoko, making it absolutely perfect because there’s no chance Midorima’s family will be around either) and then he invites Midorima over for dinner.

Takao has a game he likes to play, it’s called, “Make Shin-chan Blush Increasingly Deeper Shades of Red at Every Opportunity.” The redder Midorima gets, the more points Takao awards himself in this game. He’s winning, so far.

This night, starts with him opening the door wearing an apron. “Shin-chan, you made it!”

“What are you wearing?” Midorima sputters, already faintly red.

Takao grins, “Do you want dinner, a bath, or me?”

Midorima turns around to leave.

“Wait, wait! Come back, I was only kidding,” Takao says, pulling Midorima into the house. “Come on, I actually made dinner!”

“Fool,” Midorima says, redder than before.

Now that he’s in the house, with the door safely closed behind him, Takao goes in for the kill and takes off the apron.

“What—what is that?”

“This old thing?” Takao says, gesturing to his green shirt. “Do you like it? I made it myself.”

“Take that off right now,” Midorima says.

“Ooh, Shin-chan, so bold,” Takao grins, moving to take off his shirt.

That’s not what I meant.”

This is new levels of red on Midorima, and Takao counts this night as a huge success.

*

Himuro always wears his shirt. Pretty much whenever they’re not required to be in uniform. Murasakibara doesn’t even really bat an eye.

“Dude, I am not going out with you when you’re wearing that shirt,” Fukui says.

“Hm?” Himuro says.

“God, you two are so embarrassing. I am not going to the movies when you’re wearing a matching shirt to your matching boyfriend. Especially since you guys can’t keep your hands off each other.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Himuro says innocently.

“You’re sitting in his lap right now,” Fukui whines.

“Well, we’re not out yet,” Himuro says.

“We’ve been out with you before, it doesn’t stop you,” Liu says. “Change your shirt, Himuro.”

“But I look good in purple, don’t you think?”

“Murochin does look good in purple,” Murasakibara agrees.

“See?”

“We’re leaving you here,” Fukui says.

*

Furihata loves his shirt, but he doesn’t know when he can wear it. He is not brave enough to wear it in public, and he would get no end of grief from Kyo if he wore it around the house.

But because he wants to wear the shirt, even when he isn’t necessarily brave enough to show it off to public, he decides to wear it as an undershirt when he’s out to see Akashi. That way, he has the satisfaction of wearing it without anyone else knowing, which does provide a fair amount of satisfaction.

“Furihata,” Akashi says, in the croon of his that’s a mixture of a purr and a command and also makes Furihata shiver with all kinds of thoughts about the kind of situation they’d be in where Akashi could use that voice. “Are you wearing what I think you’re wearing?”

“Wh-what?” Furihata laughs nervously. “What are you talking about?”

“I’ve heard about the shirts from Murasakibara, Kise and a very reluctant Midorima. Is that yours?”

Furihata knows he’s blushing. He forgets sometimes that the Miracles do talk to one another. “…Maybe.”

“Please, let me see it?”

Oh god, Furihata really needs to develop some sort of immunity to Akashi when he sounds like that, because it is not good for his health. Akashi asking for anything is a particular weakness of his. Furihata peels off his top shirt, and is pretty sure he must be matching the red shirt that everyone can now see.

“How lovely,” Akashi says, sounding incredibly smug. “That’s a good color for you, Furi.”

*

“You mean you all have one?” Momoi exclaims. “That’s no fair, I want one! A pink one!”

“You’re a Miracle,” Takao points out. “You’re not qualified to be in our club.”

“I want one for Dai-chan!” Momoi insists.

“I’m not wearing a pink shirt,” Aomine says.

She sniffs. “Then I’ll see if Ryou-kun wants one.”

“No, you won’t!”

“Hmm, good point, Aomine is, technically, a Miracle Boyfriend,” Takao says, gleefully.

“I’m not joining your stupid club,” Aomine says.

“We don’t want you in our club, so you can’t join,” Kagami says.

“Shut up, Kagami, don’t tell me what to do!”

“Aomine-kun would not look good in pink,” Kuroko says innocently.

“Fuck you, Tetsu, I would look awesome in pink.”

“Done and done, then,” Takao says. “I’ll make you one by the next meeting.”



A/N: Thanks, anon-friend! I’ve been wanting to write this story. Special thanks to @shortwhiteafrican whose comment on Archive about the Miracles reactions was so spot on I had to write it (that was you, right, friend? Sorry if it’s not.) Anyway, I am starting the new year with some Designation: Miracle, so thanks, friends!!

Ugly Is In the Eye of the Wearer

Happy Holidays all!  Here is my @mlsecretsanta present for @dakoolestinu I hope you enjoy Adrien’s little adventure!

(ao3)

~~~~~~

Adrien had finished up with fencing practice, feeling accomplished as he had finally gotten a particularly tricky move working for him. He was happy with his progress and hoped he would maybe get a chance to tell his father about it.

‘Yeah, that’s not likely to happen,’ he thought to himself as he opened the locker. For a moment he thought he had the wrong locker as there was festive bag sitting inside it. But wait, no, there was all his stuff behind it.

“What’s this?” He asked out loud even as he reached in, moving the tissue paper aside. There seemed to be material underneath.

“Don’t ask me. I was napping,” the groggy voice of his kwami came from inside the locker.

“Shh,” Adrien said, looking around quickly, though there was no one near his locker. Still maybe he should wait until he got home to examine his gift. On the other paw he wanted to know who it was from. Curiosity and cats being a thing, Adrien sat the bag, which looked to have at one time been a plain paper bag but now had a Christmas tree with red balls painted on it, onto the bench.  He thought the balls looked a bit like ladybug prints, but that wasn’t the focus of his attention.  Instead he pulled out what laid inside.

The sweatshirt was green and sewn on it was a felt tree with a several cats around it.  Adrien grinned big, for all the cats were black.  There were also lights on the tree, real working lights, and it strung out onto the scene with a couple of the cats playing with it.  It was tacky, but well made.  Adrien had been gifted the best ugly sweater ever!  

Hanging off one of the cuffs of the sweatshirt was a tag.

Chat Noir, Meowry Catmas.

It wasn’t signed. Adrien looked at the back of the tag to be sure. He then examined the sweatshirt more closely.  It could have been bought, but care that was taken to keep the battery pack secure and the stitching on the felt which looked like it was done partly by hand, not by machine, made him think it was one of a kind.

’Was it Ladybug? Adrien wondered, looking again at the tag.  When he got home he would have to see if the handwriting was similar to the love poem he’d gotten.  It sure looked familiar!

Keep reading

  • EUA: Viejo pero que...?
  • México: ¿Qué?¿Acaso no dijiste nachos con queso?
  • EUA: No. Dije Netflix and chill no nachos and cheese. Además ¿Porqué sigues con las pijamas puestas?
  • México: Wey... Vete a la chingada.
  • EUA: ¿Y que es lo que estas
  • mirando?
  • México: A Tin Tan obviamente, es un clásico.
  • EUA: Bueno es bastante gracioso aún cuando no puedo entender ni una palabra.
  • (America: Dude what the...?
  • Mexico: What? Didn't you say nachos and cheese?
  • America: No. I say Netflix and chill not nachos and cheese. Also why you still wearing your pajamas.
  • Mexico: Wey... fuck off.
  • America: And what is that that you are watching?
  • Mexico: Tin Tan obviously, he's a classic.
  • America: Well is pretty funny even though I can't understand a word).
  • •Wey is something like dude but it has very different contexts.

elvendork-is-spoken-for  asked:

Heyy, so you've probably done this before but I absolutely ADORE Raphael saying cute little comments about Simon and Simon thinking they're insults, also, AHHHHHH I ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR FANFICs!!!!!!!!! <3<3<3

 sorry this is so late hope you enjoyed it also nick cage is totally a vampire. <3

__________________________________

>>you’re too pretty to be this annoying<<

Simon’s undergone a few changes recently. Y’know alive to dead. Human to Vampire. Convinced he was straight to totally in love with a dude. Changes. 

There were small ones as well. His dress sense had improved (mostly because he was wearing someone else’s clothes). He slept during the day which wasn’t so bad really. It’s not like he ever got up early to begin with. A new change that was a little weirder was his new found ability to drown out the sound of someone yelling at him in Spanish.

Being advisor to the interim chapter president meant he basically spent most of his time with Raphael. Being Simon meant he usually disobeyed orders, got into trouble and did basically anything but be adviser to the interim chapter president. No one could say Raphael’s not good with his words because he doesn’t seem to do anything but yell a lot of them at Simon. Most of the time in Spanish.

Simon realistically should realise that Raphael wouldn’t be yelling at him for nothing. But it’s kind of hard when someone as ridiculously attractive as Raphael is doing ridiculously attractive things like speaking Spanish. When he rolled his R’s Simon pretty much lost all the will to do anything but stare at his lips.

Endearingly Raphael will talk to himself in Spanish while doing basic tasks like cleaning his desk or taking stocks. Simon likes to listen to the half English half Spanish mix of sentences that are all idle thoughts he’s having. It’s a glimpse into a softer side of Raphael that Simon never thought he would treasure as much as he does.

But for as much as he likes Raphael he like’s annoying Raphael even more.

“What bothers me most about vampires is the morals. Y’know? Like most of us have them and those that don’t usually get killed so you would think that would be the end of it. Except theres all these morally questionable situations. Like what if you were vegetarian as a human or vegan? How do you uphold your morals? I just…”

“Eres deamsiado lindo para ser así de molesto” Raphael mutters and Simon is caught in how easily the Spanish rolls off his tongue. He wonders if Raphael’s tongue is talented in other ways..

What was he talking about again? Oh yeah

“I just think that there should be an alterna-“

The sigh Raphael lets out is not the first this morning.
________________

>>you’re a cute pain in my ass<<

“No I refuse. Raphael you’ve asked me to do a lot but this takes the cake. I’m not doing it!” Simon protests.

“Well, baby, as my advisor I don’t think you have a choice in the matter. If it makes you complain less neither do I”

It doesn’t make Simon complain less because he so doesn’t want to go to some upscale hoity toity vampire shindig. On his list of things to do tonight, going outside was not on that list. He wanted to stay in the hotel and continue Stan’s journey into video games. Raphael complained about Simon corrupting Stan. Simon considers it educating. Stan has tried to tell both of them that it was only a way to kill a few hours but neither of them were listening as they were so wrapped up in their argument.

The party is in one of the nicer parts of Brooklyn. Everyone there was beautiful or beautifully dressed. Simon would have hated every minute of it if it weren’t for Raphael.

“Constance Hendrick is right over there. Woman in the yellow dress”

“The sweet old lady?”

“Old lady, yes. Sweet, no. Don’t take anything she offers you. She offered me a glass of alcohol infused blood and before I knew it I’ve agreed to spend a weekend with her in Lebonon and take on two of her newest fledglings.  They were a pain in my ass" Raphael shares before taking a swig from his wine glass. Its not the first story he’s told about the various guests and Simon knows it’s probably not his last.

“So they were like me?” Simon jokes, hoping it came out lighter than it felt.

“No … you’re different”

“Different how?”

Raphael looks at him for a moment.

“Tu eres un lindo dolor en mi trasero” He says decidedly. Simon’s not sure he even wants to know what Raphael said. Especially since it got a laugh out a nearby vampire that had been listening in.

The topic dropped and they went back to people watching.

“If you bring your attention to the man who just walked in…”

“The guy that looks like Nicolas Cage?”

“You know his name?”

“Holy Face Off”

The night wasn’t a complete bust after all.
__________________________

>>you mean more than you think you do<<

“You smell like wet dog” Raphael starts. Simon was barely in the Hotel and he was already being criticized. This night couldn’t have gotten worse could it.

“Bite me” Simon retorts. He fully intends on being every bit of the angsty teenager he is and holing himself up in his room for the night.

As he goes to pass Raphael the elder vampire put out his hand to stop him. “What happened?” His voice was surprisingly gentle. Simon hesitated for a moment before waving off the question. “It was nothing” He insists.

He tries to leave  but there’s Raphael’s hand on his arm again. This time he spins the fledgling around to look at him. “Tell me” He says and it’s not a demand. Simon doesn’t know what it is but the look Raphael is giving him, the warm concern radiating from him, is making Simon’s heart flutter in the most embarrassing ways.

“Really Raphael it’s nothing I just got into a little disagreement with some of Luke’s subordinates. Nothing major” Simon says, hoping Raphael will show mercy and let the subject drop.

“Did they hurt you?” He asks, moving forward to grip Simon’s arm. Simon nearly snorts at Raphael’s mothering but he’s  not in the mood to bicker with the elder. He’s had his fair share of people calling him things today thank you very much.

“No they didn’t hurt me we just had different views on what I am in Luke’s life. It’s not an issue so can we drop it please” Simon’s voice rises near the end and he just wants to hole up in his room and stay there forever now. Raphael digests the words and there’s a moment where Simon thinks he’s going to go on a rant about how the clan was his family now not some werewolves but he doesn’t.

“You mean a lot to the alpha” Raphael says finally. Simon swallows down the lump that rises in his throat. “You don’t know that” He chokes out. He didnt want to let this get to him. Luke loves him. He’s been like his dad since he met him. ’He’s just puts up with you for Jocelyn bloodsucker. It doesn’t mean you’re welcome here’ rings in his head and if he could throw up he’d want to.

“Significas más de lo que crees”

Simon doesn’t know what he said but for once it doesn’t sound like an insult.
____________________________________

>>you’re lucky I love you idiot<<

Though Raphael has made a pointed rule of no shadowhunters in the Hotel without his consent Simon’s not stupid enough to stop Isabelle from doing what she wants. Especially since she’s got a ‘stop me and I stop your existence’ determination to her.

“What can I do for you today oh majestic shadowhunter” Simon asks as he follows her to his room. She wanted to talk to him in private so he can only assume it’s something life threatening and he’s trying very hard not to freak out. Usually when an authority figure wants to talk to you in private it means  they’re gonna tell you  something horrible like Grandpa’s dead but considering their lives lately Simon thinks Grandpa’s more likely to rise from the dead and start killing off the locals more than anything else.

They reach his room and Isabelle’s confident posture deflates a little. She looks a little more vulnerable, almost nervous. Yup Grandpa’s back and kicking up a storm.

“Look. I don’t know how to phrase this..”

“Simon! What have I told you about Shadowhunter visitations?”

Simon would piss himself if he could pee because the little shit snuck up on him again.

“I told you to stop doing that!” Simon complains. Raphael’s nagging was not exactly a welcome presence right now. “I told you no shadowhunters unless I allow them in” He replies with a shrug. He’s got a big smirk on his face and Simon knows it’s put on for show. An intimidation tactic for Isabelle’s sake.

“I’ll send you a fax next time” Simon says as he starts ushering Raphael out the door. Raphael rolls his eyes.

“Tienes suerte que te amo idiota” And just like he came he was gone. Simon lets out a long sigh before shutting the door.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Simon asks. Izzy is looking at him weirdly and he resists the urge to squirm under her gaze.

“What?”

“I didn’t know you and Raphael were a thing” Izzy says and Simon is completely caught of guard. “Wait… what?.. We’re … I….”

“Oh c'mon ‘you’re lucky I love you’. You’re not the only ones who speak Spanish” Izzy teases.

“I don’t speak spanish!” Simon exclaims because holy shit this is new and he is very distressed. How many times has Raphael said nice things that Simon doesn’t know about? He’s been essentially dreaming about Raphael whispering sweet spanish nothings in his ear since he met the guy.

“Wow and I thought my gay problems were complicated” Izzy  says as she gives Simon a friendly pat on the shoulder. Simon shoots her a glare before her words register.

“Wait you have a gay problem?”

Isabelle actually looks a little sheepish. “Yeah it’s kinda why I came here”

“Why would you co—- holy shit it’s Clary isn’t it?”

They were in for a long night.
__________________________________

After an uncomfortable conversation where Simon taught Isabelle about the ins and outs of Romancing Clary Frey he finally allowed himself to freak out properly. That is until he had a great idea.
_________________________________

This was a terrible idea. Simon can’t believe he’s doing this. Raphael’s going to laugh in his face when he hands him this. Simon will have to leave the clan in shame. He’ll only get to see Stan on weekends. Someone stop him before…

“Hey Raphael” too late.

“Fledgling what do you want?” Raphael asks. He’s looking over some paper work and Simon wants to crawl in a hole and die (again) but he makes himself walk forward.

“This is for you” Simon murmurs, holding out an envelope with a shaking hand. Raphael barely looks up as he takes it. 

“That all?” He asks. Simon tries not to let his disappointment at being mostly ignored show.

“That’s all” and then he runs.
_________________________________

He hides up in his room for the day curled up in a ball of anxiety and anticipation. He gave Raphael 16 lines of compliments translated into Spanish by Isabelle. 16 lines that told Raphael everything Simon felt for him and it still didn’t feel like enough. At any moment Raphael could be reading it. At any moment he could make or break this thing that they have.

He likes what they have. He likes it a lot.
________________________________

Simon wakes up to someone jabbing him in the side. He shoots up and nearly bashes his head against his assailant. “I’m up!” Simon yells out of habit. His mom was fond of pulling the covers away to wake him up. Jabbing made cover theft almost favorable.

“Did you mean it?”

It takes Simon a minute to realize he’s staring at a crazed looking Raphael Santiago.

“What?” Is all Simon can manage. He’s a little disorientated at the moment and Raphael’s rumpled hair wasn’t making it any better. It looks like he’s been running his hands through it. All soft and out of place. Simon wonders what it would feel like between his fingers…

“Did you mean what you said in the letter?” He asks again, a little slower so Simon can process it.

Simon takes in his words before they finally click. “Every word” He affirms without hesitation. He doesn’t get a chance to appreciate the look of pure elevation on Raphael’s face as the leader bridges the gap between them.

Raphael kisses him until he feels like he’s drowning. And really what a way to die?
_______________________________

“Que vale la pena los atardeceres que he perdido”

“what does that mean?”

“you’re worth the sunsets that I lost”

Your Name Is Dave Strider

Your name is Dave Strider, and you are NOT in love with him. You aren’t even gay for that matter. You’ve been stuck on this meteor for six months, and for lack of anything else, spend your days with a troll named Karkat Vantas.

“HEY STRIDER, ARE WE GONNA FINISH THIS OR ARE YOU JUST GOING TO SIT THERE WITH THAT STUPID LOOK ON YOUR FACE ALL DAY?”

In fact, there he is now. You look at him, shaking your head slightly to bring yourself out of your thoughts.

“Yeah man let’s get to it,” you reply, “This town isn’t gonna build itself.”

You kneel down near the troll, picking up one of the cans near you. The two of you had been working on an expansion of Can Town for the Mayor, and though the project had started out as more a way of staving off boredom than anything else, you had to admit it had turned out pretty nice. You quickly fell into the rhythm that had become so familiar to you over the past few months, and when you took a step back a little while later to check your work, you couldn’t help but feel a certain sense of pride. Your pride is interrupted by a sudden stream of swears, accompanied by the sound of crashing metal. You whip your head to the sound, fighting back a small smile. Karkat was sitting not far away, brows drawn together in a pile of cans where the new bank was supposed to go. This had become a common occurrence, and with your days work done, you walked over to the angry troll.

As you approached, Karkat drew a breath, seemingly to give you a long-winded “Fuck off”. As he did so, his eyes fell on the pile around him, and appeared to resign himself to your assistance. He shifted slightly as to give you room, and you both began forming foundation of the building. With the rhythmic clanking of the process resumed, you glance over at Karkat, who was focused intently on the job at hand. His brows were knitted together in concentration, rather than his usual anger, and the tip of his tongue had slightly protruded from his mouth. In this state he almost looked…

God damn he’s cute.

You freeze in surprise of your own thoughts. Did you really just think that? Why would you? I mean you’re just two bros who hang out for lack of anything else to do. It’s not like you’re even into guys.

He’s so perfect.

What? No he’s just a friend the friendliest of friends and you are BY NO MEANS attracted to your friend even if he is… You are pulled from your small internal crisis by shouted words.

“WELL ARE YOU JUST GONNA STAND THERE WITH THAT CAN ALL DAY OR ARE YOU GOING TO USE IT?”

You turn to him, quickly recovering your cool-kid composure.

“Hey man, you can’t rush perfection,” you say, making a big show of inspecting the area where the can was to be placed.

“AND WHY THE EVERLOVING FUCK IS YOUR FACE SO RED?”

Shit.

“It gets pretty hot in here when you’re wearing this plush ass cape around dude.”

“THEN WHY DON’T YOU JUST TAKE IT OFF? OR CAN YOUR INCOMPETENT HUMAN BRAIN NOT HANDLE THAT SOLUTION?”

For you? Gladly.

Your blush deepens at the thought, and you attempt, poorly, to cover it by throwing up your hood and whipping your cape dramatically to your face, as though you were a classic vampire.

“This cape holds great symbolism my gray friend.” You turn around, throwing it over your shoulder as you do. “I can’t just take it off for no reason, you gotta take pride in this shit.”

“YOU’VE SAID A LOT OF STUPID THINGS DAVE, BUT I THINK THAT TAKES THE CAKE.” Karkat rolls his eyes and focuses his attention back to the nearly-finished bank, saying a little softer,

“WELL ARE YOU GOING TO HELP OR WHAT?”

You kneel down and work as quickly as you can without knocking over the building, hoping that the sooner you finish the sooner you can get away from him, to be alone with your traitorous thoughts.


It had been a month since the Can Town incident, and you had been systematically avoiding Karkat ever since. It had been difficult at first, as he had tried to contact you incessantly for nearly a week after he figured out that you were trying to keep away from him. Even the few times he had managed to talk to you, you had kept it brief, cold even. You felt bad, but what could you do when every time you were around him your mind betrayed you? When every time you thought of him, your heart beat a little faster, and your stomach felt it was twisting itself in knots. Rose had tried to talk to you when she got wind of the situation, finally tearing herself away from her books and Kanaya. You had told her a little bit, but had quickly absconded when she had suggested that you had romantic feelings for the troll. You spent most of your days in some remote part of the meteor or another now, not really speaking to anybody out of shame and awkwardness.

Rose was right you know.

You wanted to argue, but you had given up. You knew in some part of you, that it was true. You didn’t want to admit it, but there was nothing you could do. You couldn’t tell anybody. Hell, you didn’t even want to tell yourself.

Even if I did tell him, what would happen?

What if he didn’t feel the same way?

What if he hated me for it?

What if he told all the others?

What WOULD he tell all the others?

What if they all turned against me for it?

In the back of your mind, you knew the last part was ridiculous. But to your paranoia fueled thoughts, it seemed to make sense. You picked up a stray rock from the floor of one of the seemingly endless hallways you had inhabited for the past weeks, throwing it has hard as you could into the blackness. The rock quickly bounced out of sight, although you had no way of telling whether it went very far, as it was abysmally dark in the hall. You had even discarded your ever-present shades as to hopefully see a little better, as there was nobody around to hide from. You lean your back against one of the walls and slowly slide down, propping your elbows on your knees and burying your face in them. You’ve grown accustomed to this sort of self-pity, and hated yourself all the more for it. You stayed like that for you don’t know how long, whether it was minutes, hours, even days. For a Knight of Time you sure can’t keep track of it very well. You had a short, bitter laugh at that. Then, rage overtook your cynical enjoyment and you grabbed handfuls of your hair, pulling at it as though it were the awful feelings you were trying so hard to run away from. You banged the back of your head against the wall, letting your hands drop between your knees, and muttered to yourself,

“What is wrong with me?”

“I was hoping you could answer that for me.”

You jump at the sudden voice, and for a moment wonder if the constant isolation as finally made you crack. This fear is dispelled though, when a familiar figure walks out of the darkness.

“Karkat,” you say, your mouth going dry, “what are you doing here?”

He shakes his head and sighs in exasperation.

“I don’t know Dave, what reason could I possibly have for hunting you down?”

His voice is quieter than normal, and if you wouldn’t see him standing right in front of you, you wouldn’t have recognized him. However, he makes up for the volume in the anger he laces his voice in, and if you didn’t know better, you’d say there was a hint of… sadness? When you don’t respond, Karkat continues,

“Let’s cut to the chase Dave. You’ve been avoiding me, and you know what? I want to know why.”

He steps closer to you, squaring his shoulders. He’s angry, and not the normal angry he always is. Karkat, your former friend, is absolutely livid. You slowly stand up, pulling your shades from a stray pocket in your cape. At least with those, you can face him with some dignity left. As you move them towards your face, the troll makes a sound that almost resembles a growl, and you freeze.

“GOD DAMN IT DAVE,” Karkat seems to explode, “I HUNTED YOU DOWN THROUGH WHO KNOWS HOW MANY MILES OF METEOR AND NOW YOU AREN’T EVEN GOING TO LOOK ME IN THE EYE?”

You shrug slightly, and resign yourself to your fate.

Well, I tried.

You square your shoulders, looking Karkat straight in the eye, preparing yourself for the verbal beating of a lifetime. Karkat wastes no time delivering it to you.

“YOU JUST ONE DAY LEAVE AND EXPECT ME TO JUST ACCEPT IT? YOU EXPECT ME TO JUST LEAVE YOU ALONE? IT WAS ONE THING WHEN YOU SUDDENLY DECIDED I WASN’T WORTHY TO BREATHE THE SAME AIR AS YOU AND REFUSED TO SPEAK TO ME WITH MORE THAN THREE WORD SENTENCES BUT NOW YOU JUST RUN OFF? WHAT THE FUCK STRIDER? NOW I WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS SO FUCKING BAD ABOUT ME THAT YOU FIGURED THAT THIS DARK HALLWAY WAS SO MUCH FUCKING BETTER THAN MY GODDAMN COMPANY. WHAT DID I DO THAT WAS SO TERRIBLE THAT YOU SPEND YOUR TIME SO FAR REMOVED FROM EVERYBODY ELSE THAT NOT EVEN GAMZEE KNEW WHERE YOU WERE? WHAT WAS SOOOO BAD…”

Karkat was going red in the face, waving his arms with the passion and anger that he spoke his words. He continued his rant, but you stopped listening. Not because you didn’t care, but because he had it all wrong.

What did I do?

Did I ruin everything?

Is this really what he thinks?

Oh God

I ruined everything before it even began.

What have I done?

He’s got it all wrong.

I don’t hate him.

I could never hate him.

I…

“Karkat,” you say, so softly you can barely hear yourself.

“AND THEN ALL YOU DO IS…”

He doesn’t hear you, just continues his tirade.

“Karkat,” you say a little louder.

“AND NOW I FIND OUT THAT YOU…”

“KARKAT!” You finally shout.

He stops, surprised at the interruption. You take the moment to walk quickly over to him, and he braces himself as if you were going to fight. Just as he was drawing breath to say, or rather, shout, something else, you grab his face in both of your hands, and kiss him. You feel him tense up in surprise, and suddenly you feel hands on your chest, forcefully pushing you away. You stagger slightly, tripping over your own feet, as the realization of what you just did hits you.

What have I done?

You see his face contorting in confusion.

I’ve ruined everything.

Your face reddens in embarrassment and shame. Tears prick your eyes, and you wish you had your shades to hide behind.

He hates me now.

The confusion on the trolls face turns to anger.

Nonononono this can’t be real this can’t be happening.

He starts striding towards you, and you step backwards, trying once again to run away from what you’ve done.

“I’m sorr…” you start to say, desperately, but you’re stopped by a Karkat’s harsh voice ordering you to shut up. He grabs the front of your shirt, pulling you to him and leaving you no chance to run. You tense, waiting for the punch the you’re sure will follow.

But it doesn’t.

Instead, you feel soft lips against yours, angry but sweet. They pull away, leaving you shocked. Karkat bangs his head softly into your chest, and you hear him mutter softly,

“God damn it Dave.”

His hand drops from your shirt, and he leans against you. Tentatively, you say

“So does that mean you…?”

You feel a faint increase and decrease of pressure on your chest, consistent with a small nod. You breathe a heavy sigh of relief, and wrap your arms around the troll, resting your head on top of his. A small smile touches your lips and you feel what seems to be a crushing amount of weight lifted from your shoulders.

Your name is Dave Strider, and you love him.

The Love Doctor

It’s difficult for Hiccup to sneak up on things. He can’t exactly tiptoe after all, and the long corridor leading to the modest apartment he shares with his friend Lance has a hardwood floor that magnifies the hollow step of his artificial foot. He startles suddenly as the door across the hall flies open just as he reaches his doorknob. A wrinkled old face with the complexion of curdled milk scowls at him from inside the doorway.

“Oh, hey there Mr. Meadows,” Hiccup says, with an amicable wave. “How are you doing today?”

The old man harrumphs disdainfully and slams the door. “A pleasure as always Mildew,” Hiccup mutters under his breath, wrinkling his nose in distaste as he fumbles for his key and quietly slides it into the lock.

Despite the early hour, Lance is waiting for him inside the apartment, standing by the kitchen sink wearing nothing but a wrinkled pair of grey boxer shorts, There’s a large mixing bowl overflowing with cereal balanced in his left hand and he’s holding an oversized wooden mixing spoon in the other.

Keep reading

I’m a crossdresser

I’m hesitant to call myself a writer because I don’t do it often, and I haven’t actually been published in years. Part of the problem is that I approach personal interests the same way my old border collie approached his. (WOW! TUG TOY! FUN! SQUIRREL!? SQUIRREL!) When I write or exercise or, yes, crossdress, it briefly becomes an obsession, then I throw it on the back burner and move onto something else. While I don’t go around telling people I’m a writer, I won’t hesitate to consider myself a crossdresser.

I’m realizing that crossdressing is an activity as well as an identity. I’m not the best at it, and I sure as hell don’t want to do it everyday, but it’s not going anywhere. When you tell someone you’re a writer or fisher or software developer, you have to back it up with something. Crossdressers are just people who wear different clothes. Whether you “pass” or how frequently you do it isn’t important. The truth is, the hairy dude sitting in his bedroom wearing a dress and the pretty, dolled-up college kid hitting the club are both crossdressers. The only hurdle is indulging your urge that first time. Once you’re in, you’re in.

nymphadorathetemplar  asked:

Klance College & Soulmate AUs (1st words they say to you are on your wrist in their handwriting) might be fun if one of em, proly Kieth, has shitty handwriting & other is basically guessing at what the words are. Keith is working as an ad Santa for some shop when Lance comes across him on snack run for a x-mas party. Sorry if this is too much I just thought you might have fun with this idea, feel free to use as much or little of this idea as you want I just really want a Klance SoulmateAU

This ended up being longer than a drabble, but it was super fun to write and love that idea for a soulmate AU. So much can be done with that >). Enjoy!


“What the absolute fuck?”

The words just appeared on Lance’s wrist one morning at the beginning of the semester, and he’d been staring at them for months now. 

He had always dreamed of this moment, of the day he would see the words written on his wrist, the mark of a soulmate. Their words in their handwriting, the first thing they ever said to him, embedded in his skin deeper than any tattoo. He’d spent so much of his imagination mulling over what the words would look like, what they would say, ever since he was about seven when he learned of such things.

But as the years became a decade and there were still no words on his wrist, Lance felt a growing sense of panic. If he had gone this long without meeting his soulmate, then where were they? How could he possibly find them?

That was, admittedly, half the reason why Lance left home for college. If his soulmate wasn’t anywhere in all the Los Angeles area, then he needed to expand his horizons. So he enrolled at a university in Nevada with an excellent astronomy program, packed his bags, kissed his parents goodbye, and it was off to find his soulmate.

Welp, at nineteen, he finally found them. According to the words on his wrist.

And it was nothing like what Lance had imagined. There was no magical meeting, no deep exchange of words, no spark of soul recognition. Someone said something to him, probably something insignificant because Lance couldn’t remember it at all, and bam. He suddenly found himself doubling over in pain in the men’s restroom in the student lounge. 

That… actually didn’t help anything at all.

Because the words were written by someone who hadn’t bothered working on their handwriting since they were in the first grade, apparently. Lance couldn’t remember who had said what to him because he couldn’t fucking read the damn mark at all! What kind of fucking chicken scratch was this? Did this person not know their handwriting was eventually going to be marked on the skin of someone else? Couldn’t they have at least tried to make it legible out of basic courtesy? Lance had seen so many soul marks from elegant to bubbly on the wrists of others, and the bitterness grew darker.


Did Santa just seriously cut in front of him?

Lance had been buying some snacks for the dorm Christmas bash at the gas station, and some asshole in a red suit with fluffy white trimming just slipped in line like Lance hadn’t standing there at all. Short ass Santa, too. “Well, ho ho ho to you, too, jolly red fuck,” Lance snapped. “I was standing here first.” He was in no mood to even be the slightest bit polite.

“Sorry, dude, I’m just – “

Santa cut off as he turned around, and their eyes met. Santa wasn’t wearing his beard, his face plain as daylight, and holy shit, it was Keith, one of his classmates from… biology lab? History 102? Lance couldn’t really remember. He never spoke to Keith like at all. But he knew Keith’s name. Everyone did. The pretty boy of campus. At least five girls in every one of Lance’s classes gushed about him during lecture. Ugh, Lance hated this guy. Hated how popular he was without even trying.

Keith’s eyes narrowed. “Who are you?”

God.

“The name’s Lance. We have an English composition class together. Maybe. The fuck are you doin’ here and what are you wearin’?”

“None of your – “

Suddenly, Keith doubled over yelping in pain and gripping his wrist with one hand. Other people crowded around them, wondering what was going on. Lance knew what was happening. He just knew.

He had never spoken to Keith before. 

Until now.

“Fuck,” Keith gasped through heavy breaths. His Santa hat had fallen off his head, and his skin was slick with sweat. “Oh, fuck. Ow.”  

This. Wasn’t. Happening.

When Keith finally managed to push past the pain to stare at Lance, they could not look away for a long, long moment. Two souls finally recognizing the other.

The time marks took to respond to souls meeting differed depending on the person and the situation. Soulmarks usually appeared immediately if two people were speaking directly to each other. Your soulmate speaking to you in passing, on the other hand, had a bit more of a delay.

“Let me see your wrist,” Keith demanded, and snatched it before Lance could respond because, damn, that shit’s a little personal. He tore the sleeve of Lance’s coat back, and his eyes went impossibly wide. “Fuck.”

Lance looked back down at his wrist, and now that their souls had recognized each other, he actually could read that gross chicken scratch.

Thanks for using all the toilet paper, asshole.

“Seriously?” Lance screeched. “Of all the things you could first say to me! Even a boring ‘hi’ would be better!”

“Oh, like yours is a keeper!” Keith hissed back, holding up his wrist, raw from the recent marking. And there, in Lance’s pristine handwriting, read the words: 

Well, ho ho ho to you, too, jolly red fuck.

The crowd around them began to clap and cheer. Two soulmates meeting was always a momentous occasion. Even if this was hardly the romantic norm.

“So, you, uh, wanna grab coffee sometime or somethin’,” Lance asked, feeling his face grow red.

Keith’s face turned just as red, if not brighter, and he pulled his Santa hat back over his head. “O-only if you’re paying.”

[Send me a VLD ship/prompt and I’ll write a little holiday drabble! :D]