but you know in my head every day is river song appreciation day

“Mine” Series: Part 1: We’re Taking On the World Together

A/N: This is a three-part series based on Taylor Swift’s song, “Mine.” A summary [without giving too much away] would be: this series is about the evolvement of yours and Harry’s relationship– the excitement and the struggles, the pits and peaks. No matter how crazy life gets, your each other’s safety nets.

Message me HERE for requests, questions, and feedback… they’re always welcome and appreciated. Much love. x

It was a view you had only ever seen on television or in photographs. It was surreal. You and Harry were at the top of the highest mountain, overlooking valleys, trees, and a long, clear blue river that wrapped around. The sun was setting and the sky was all sorts of beautiful. Orange, pink, lavender colors decorated the sky. The photos you took on your phone didn’t do the view justice. All you could do was remember its beauty.

You loved it on the mountain with Harry. You were secluded and alone. There was no noise but the sounds of your breaths. It was the most peaceful, relaxed, and intimate the two of you had been in a long while.

It was definitely needed. You and Harry needed to pull away from the chaos that surrounded your lives and take a moment for yourselves. You needed to spend time with one another without any distractions or interruptions.

Life had been in full speed the past several months. You had gotten accepted into Law school. Your courses were extensive and required a lot of time to be dedicated towards working on assignments and reviewing for tests. It was a type of pressure different from undergraduate school. On top of that, you were also working as an assistant at a law firm. Harry, on the other hand, was booked every single day, going here going there, promoting his album and playing shows. He would leave for days, even weeks, at a time. You lived under the same roof but it was as if you never saw each other. On the days Harry would be home, you were either working, at school, or too busy burying your nose in textbooks studying. Other days you would stay up and wait for Harry to come home but he was already exhausted from a long, tiresome day all he could muster up was energy for a kiss then head straight to bed.

Something had to be done. You and Harry needed to put life on pause before things fell apart. Things had gotten so chaotic you began to neglect one another. So you and Harry cleared your schedule for the next three weeks, booked a flight, and been disengaged from the rest of the world since. It was the best thing the two of you had ever done.

Your three weeks were rejuvenating. It relit the spark that had been overshadowed by busy lives. It reminded you and Harry why you fell in love with each other. The three weeks brought back the feelings you had on your first date, the first time you spent the night together, the time the two of you moved in with one another… It was like falling in love all over again.

“I don’t want to go home,” you said. Your eyes were focused on the view in front of you as your head rested on Harry’s shoulder.
“Neither do I, luv,” he whispered.

You and Harry had three more days left on holiday. Three more days to appreciate the peace, the quiet, the privacy. There were no cameras or photographers. There were no screaming fans or demanding bosses. There were no business meetings or classes or assignments. Just you and Harry.

“I’m glad we did this,” you looked up at Harry, his green eyes locking with yours. He smiled, his dimples pronounced. He leaned forward and pressed his rosy lips onto yours. He laid it there for a moment, leaving no empty space between you. He pulled away slowly and whispered, “I love you, Y/N. More than you will ever know.”

“What happens when we get home? Is it going to be the same way again? Me at school and you gone?” you had a hint of sadness in the tone of your voice Harry picked up on.

“No,” he assured you. “We’ll do it better this time, luv. We’ll fix it.”

“How can you be so sure?”

He pressed his lips onto your forehead and you closed your eyes at the touch of his soft lips. Every time Harry touched you, it sent a wave of electricity and excitement through you, but also a sense of calmness and security. “Because I never wan’ t’ lose you, luv,” he answered.

“You won’t.” You nuzzled the top of your head into the crook of his neck and hugged his arm. “You won’t.”

“I know,” he responded. “There’s something I want’d to do before we went home…”

“What is it, babe?”

Harry pulled away from you  and wiped the dirt off from his bottom. He reached a hand out toward you to pull you up. “Would you look at that bird,” he pointed behind you. “It’s beau’iful.”

You spun around and your eyes searched the sky for what you thought could be an eagle. But the sky was empty. Your eyes shifted to the tall green trees but there was no sign of life. You spun around defeated, “Harry, I don’t see—”

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It has been a week and I still cannot believe the absolute perfect genius of the official cassian andor playlist on spotify and I need to break it down for everyone who hasn’t listened to it:

  1. what do I even do with “ain’t no man” I mean: “there ain’t no man that can save me / there ain’t no man that can enslave me / ain’t no man or men that can change the shape my soul is in” and “you got to serve something, ain’t that right / I know it gets dark but there’s always a light” and “not a whole lot of time for me or you / got a whole lot of reasons to be mad, let’s not pick one”
  2. the tone of “gimme something good” is just so raw and rough and stern
  3. obviously “ophelia” kills me every time: “heaven help the fool who falls in love” like okay star wars be less subtle but also “and I don’t feel no remorse, and you can’t see past my blinders” okay
  4. “lake michigan” gives us “heaven is a switchboard that you want to fight / she would even miss you if you taught her sight” but also “sky is burning/ but at least we’re warm”
  5. the chorus to “man on the moon” is just stellar with “I’m just a man on the moon / I’m not coming down anytime soon / I’m just a man on the moon / feet off the ground, I’m floating in you”
  6. “when my time comes” is the most ridiculously cassian song there is: “I lived less like a workhorse / more like a slave / I thought that one quick moment / that was noble or brave / would be worth the most of my life” and “I wanted to pay for my successes / with all my defeats / and if heaven was all / that was promised to me / why don’t I pray for death?” and “you can stare into the abyss, but it’s starin’ right back” like can we talk about cassian’s passive death wish?
  7. the only reason to include “honey I’ve been thinking about you” is to focus on how cassian is falling in love, there’s no other reason to do this
  8. “24 frames” is a perfect mix of “cassian is falling in love with jyn” and “cassian is an unapologetic rebel”. lyrics of note include my favorite bit of “you thought god was an architect, now you know / he’s something like a pipe bomb ready to blow” , “this is how you make yourself vanish into nothing / and this is how you make yourself worthy of the love that she / gave to you / back when you didn’t own a beautiful thing” and “everything you built that’s all for show goes up in flames”
  9. and then we get “human” which is like EADU EADU EADU all over the place with “some people got the real problems / some people out of luck / some people think I can solve them / lord heavens above / I’m only human after all / I’m only human after all / don’t put the blame on me / don’t put the blame on me”
  10. we have another “cassian is thinking about jyn way more than necessary” song with “the girl” which has the softest and least expected tone for this unapologetic’s rebel’s playlist
  11. “down in the valley” includes the lyrics “I wish I was a slave to an age-old trade / like ridin’ around on railcars and workin’ long days” which is the third reference to slavery in this playlist guys I’m pretty sure cassian and his family were slaves under the empire before he joined the rebellion :(
  12. cassian is back on the angsty romance express with “alone”: “you come into the world alone / and you go out of the world alone / but in between, there’s you and me”
  13. then we’re preparing to head to scarif with “ends of the earth”:  “I’m on a river that winds on forever / follow ‘til I get where I’m goin’ / maybe I’m headin’ to die but I’m still gonna try / I guess I’m goin’ alone”
  14. “hold back the river” like okay B Y E but also “lonely water, lonely water, won’t you let us wander / let us hold each other / hold back the river, let me look in your eyes” FIGHT ME PLAYLIST DESIGNER
  15. also “man on fire” can get out of here with “I wanna see our bodies burning like the old big sun / I wanna know what we’ve been learning and learning from”
  16. “the way we move” continues to rub it in with “at the last supper honey / make sure you get something, something to eat / there we are extending into shooting stars” like at this point I’m assuming the playlist designer was just crying into their beer over the end of the movie
  17. but then “babel” slowly eases us back into mildly less upsetting territory with “I know the time has numbered my days / and I’ll go along with everything you say” and some romance because that’s where cassian’s head is these days with “I ain’t ever lived a year better spent in love”
  18. “S.O.B.” aka the most unapologetic rebel ever with repeated “son of a bitch get me a drink”s and “now for seventeen years I’ve been throwing them back / seventeen more will bury me”
  19. our playlist designer has opened another drink and is crying again with “you’re gone but you’re not forgot / you got the cash but your credit’s no good / you flipped the script and you shot the plot / and I remember I remember when your neon used to burn so bright and pink / a saturday night kinda pink” in “sedona”
  20. “spirits” is another A-list cassian andor song with “I got guns in my head and they won’t go / spirits in my head and they won’t go”
  21. cassian finding some unexpected happiness with “even the darkness has arms” where we get this gem: “even the darkness has arms / but they ain’t got you / baby, I have it, and I have you too”
  22. “california” brings the rudeness level back up to a 10 with “someday I’ll be coming home / with a cast iron soul” and “I can see the water / I can taste the sea”
  23. I bet you didn’t expect the playlist to be this long, did you? well we’re not done yet! onto “only son” which mostly makes me think cassian was an only child and then the rebellion became his family, which fits
  24. “all my days” AKA THE MOST RIDICULOUS INSANE HEART EYES SONG ON THIS LIST EVEN WORSE THAN “OPHELIA” I MEAN WHAT THE HELL BUT ALSO THANK YOU “well I have been searching all of my days”, “well I have been quietly standing in the shade / all of my days”, “well many a night I found myself with no friends standing near / all of my days” and finally “now I see clearly / it’s you I’m looking for / all of my days / soon I’ll smile / I know I’ll feel this loneliness no more / all of my days / for I look around me / and it seems you’ve found me / and it’s coming into sight” OKAY THEN BUDDY you cannot make this stuff up
  25. I’m fairly certain that “don’t carry it all” is the musical equivalent to the whole hangar speech scene: “this I swear to all, this I swear to all” and “you must bear your neighbors burden within reason / and your labors will be borne when all is done, and nobody nobody knows / let the yoke fall from our shoulders / don’t carry it all don’t carry it all” which honestly is a nice penultimate lyrics song
  26. my response to “in the aeroplane over the sea” is essentially so that happened I mean “and one day we will die / and our ashes will fly from the aeroplane over the sea / but for now we are young / let us lay in the sun / and count every beautiful thing we can see / love to be / in the arms of all I’m keeping here with me” and mostly I think our playlist designer is moving towards the acceptance stage of grief because it has a hard brightness to it
  27. AND THEN FINALLY “rogue one”, the soundtrack for when they head off to scarif, full of hope and purpose and rebellions are built on hope

I’d put this under a cut but I really wanted you all to see how long the playlist was. I also wanted everyone to appreciate the genius of it, listen to it asap, and have some lyrics on hand for any more of those amazing photosets and gifsets people are making

eta: I missed two in the original post because this playlist is so kriffing long

The Troubadour

Requested by Anon

Summary: The reader is a traveling musician who has come to Camelot to make some money.

Warnings: alcohol consumption

A/N: I used to work at a renaissance festival, and, oh my goodness, the musicians have definitely been one of my favorite parts of the job! They’re all such sweet people and the love that they have for their instruments is unreal. Excuse any musical mistakes I make–this is coming from someone with the musical talents of patio furniture (and not even good patio furniture, I’m talking about vintage wicker patio furniture that your grandma keeps around because it was a popular style in the 60s. That patio furniture).

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Apples and Oranges

Bucky x Reader

Summary – This drabble is based off of Pink Floyd’s  Apples and Oranges  for Jays Food Songs Challenge. Bucky is living in Bucharest and visits the market every day to buy his plums.  One day he notices you there as well.

Warnings – Angst

Word Count – 540

Notes –When I saw the lyrics were about a girl buying fruit, I just had to write about Bucky and his plums!!!  I hope you enjoy!!  As always, feedback is appreciated!

**Special tag: @i-dont-know-how-to-write 


Originally posted by heartfulloffandoms

Got a flip-top pack of cigarettes in her pocket
Feeling good at the top
Shopping in sharp shoes
Walking in the sunshine town feeling very cool
But the butchers and the bakers in the supermarket stores
Getting everything she wants from the supermarket stores
Apples and oranges
Apples and oranges

Bucky had been in Bucharest for a few weeks now, but he still wasn’t comfortable letting down his guard.  He tried to vary his routine in order to stay under the radar.  He just couldn’t stay away from the little outdoor market, though. They had the best plums and the owner of the booth was always very kind to him.  

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fairynarrytale-deactivated20170  asked:

"We're neighbours and we've never met, but I hear you singing Disney songs in the shower every morning and I may have accidentally shouted a request" (Narry) 💗💗

sorry I took forever to actually write this but I doubt you’re surprised by that

Harry gets in from his morning jog at just before seven in the morning. He feels accomplished, not only from his run but also because he’s fairly certain he’s worked out the best route to take—one that doesn’t have him coming across too many other early-morning joggers and gives him an excellent scenic tour of the outskirts of the university campus. He’s rather excited about the autumn, thinks of all the trees he runs underneath that will have their leaves turning glowing reds and oranges and yellows in just a few weeks.

He stops by his dorm room to grab a towel and switch out his running shoes for his shower flip flops before he approaches the bathroom. All of the young men on the floor have a space in the shower room for their various soaps and washcloths in a grid of yellow squares just across from the sinks. Harry has his things in the top row, second column from the right, in a purple shower basket that he picks up and takes with him to the middle shower. Their floor is fairly small, so they only have three showers in the men’s bathroom. The middle one has the best water pressure, so Harry takes advantage of his peers’ lazier sleeping habits and claims said superior shower.

Mid-way through conditioning his hair, Harry hears the tell-tale sound of someone else entering the room. The other student is humming, that much Harry can hear, but not loud enough to truly carry over the sound of the water beating down on Harry’s head and shoulders. He goes for the shower nearest the door, which is the second best in terms of effectively getting someone wet and rinsing away soap. Harry, of course, goes along with his shower without sparing any more thought to the other.

That was the plan, anyway. But he couldn’t exactly ignore the singing.

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Who’s That Vans Girl?: @lizmariah

Hailing from the Philippines, we have blogger/stylist Liz Mariah and her epic fashion sense. We stumbled upon this down-to-earth girl one day while scrolling through the #VansGirls feed, and immediately fell head-over-heels with her simple, mono-chrome color scheme and her love for wearing Sk8-Hi’s every day of the week. We took some time to get to know the girl behind the black and white.

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MMFD Fic: "No Alarms and No Surprises" - Chapter 1

Finn never told her he loves her outside the chippy, and the Friends Zone closed in on them with the slam of a prison door. Now it’s four years later and things are changing whether he likes it or not.

Chapter 1

There were many moments in which he could have told her along the way. He’d let them all go. Wasted. He could have told her at the very beginning, when she broke his heart in the cupboard, or at his nan’s funeral, when she found him crying behind the trees and held his hand, or after she stood up in front of an entire wedding party and told them all the truth about herself, but he had been struck by how brave and lovely she was, plus the fact that she had basically looked straight at Archie and confessed that she’s been fantasizing about him… so Finn did nothing. And The Friends Zone closed in on them with the slam of a prison door.


It would have been perfect to tell her on her last night before going to Uni, when they spent the entire evening walking around town, talking and being sentimental, trying to prepare themselves to be apart from each other for the first time in three years. They were standing on the bridge, looking down the River Welland rushing by, Rae leaned over to look further down, and her hair seemed to be taking flight. Finn’s fingers reached, of their own accord, to touch the ends of it, but then she turned to him and he shoved his hand inside his pocket instead. Her eyes were shining with unshed tears.

“Shit,” he said. “I was gonna cry.”

Rae shook her head and wiped her eyes. “Well, you can’t, you know the deal. Only one of us is allowed to fall apart at any given moment.”

“Yeah, tha’s the deal.” It only took a small gesture of invitation from him to have her tuck herself into his side in a hug. “Wha’ you crying for, silly girl?”

“Just can’t believe I’m finally out of here, and already I want to be back.”

“Just wait, you’ll get to London and you’ll forget all about us little people.” He always said these things jokingly, but inside he was terrified that it’ll go exactly like that. She’ll go and be brilliant in a place where they appreciate brilliant people like her, and he’ll be just a boy she knew once, who isn’t all that brilliant, who doesn’t really do anything much or knows where he’s going.

“Hey, so, I got this for ya.” She said, pulling something from her coat pocket and dangling it in front of him.

“What’s this? We didn’t say we’re doing presents.”

Rae shrugged, still attached to his side, then nudged him teasingly. “Guess I’m a better friend than you, ey?”

Reluctantly, he let go of her so he could unwrap the crappy wrapper and silly bow. Inside he found a pack of a dozen cheap plastic cigarette lighters with naked ladies drawn on them. He barked a laugh. “You nutter!”

“That way when you lose them every fucking where, you’ll always have a spare.”

He looked up at her, his eyes were probably a little shiny. “I liked it better when you were the one always finding them for me.”

Rae’s eyes left his, she looked down. “Well… now we need a plan B.”

He looked at the naked ladies again, then hugged her to him hard. “Thanks, Rae. I’ll take care of them as if they were my babies.”

“Yeah… you’ll lose them all within two months.” She joked, and he protested, and they both laughed even though it wasn’t that funny. The whole moment felt unstable and desperate. Then Rae sighed, “Finn…?”, and her voice shuddered on that one syllable. Finn didn’t know why, but his heart, already beating fast, began to really pound then.


But she didn’t continue, and she moved out of his embrace and grabbed the banister with both hands, turning her face from him.


“What if I told ya…” Her voice died down, then she took a deep breath and tried again. “What if I– what would you say if I told ya…”

Finn wasn’t even breathing. He just stood there like a complete knob until she finally turned, her face flushed, and she shook her head and laughed a little. “If I told you I plan on calling you in all hours of the day and night, whenever the mood strikes me. Like, if I’m in a swanky London club and it’s 3AM and they’re playing our song, I’m calling you and I don’t even care.”

He played that moment in his head over and over, for months after that. How he froze, half way between amazingly relieved and excruciatingly disappointed, knowing full well that she’d bottled it and didn’t say what was really on her mind, that he only had to prod a little bit, to ask her one time, and she’d tell him the thing she didn’t say. He remembers vividly letting the moment go. Remembers how she looked on that bridge, with the wind lifting her hair and waving it about. His eyes focused on her smiling lips, he took a step closer with a surge of intention he couldn’t name… and the thoughts came rushing - this is stupid, she’s leaving in the morning, what was the point. He kissed her cheek, and spent the following three weeks trying not to throw himself off that bridge.


And there were a million other, less perfect but totally legitimate moments that had gone past since the 20p all those years ago, where he could have turned to his best mate, the person closest to him in the world, and tell her what’s really on his mind.

She was the one whose opinion mattered the most, the person he told all his secrets to. He could tell her anything. But he couldn’t tell her this. Once they’d become mates, he couldn’t see his way out. They went on like that, day after day, year after year, until what they had was this relationship, this… best–mate–dom, where he was spending all his energy keeping her from knowing. And after a while it just becomes what they do, what they are. She has Chloe and Archie and he has Chop, but it’s nothing like what they are to each other. They pride themselves on telling each other everything – every small insignificant thing and every big painful secret. Almost.

He always tells her about the girls he’s dating, looking in her eyes, looking to see if it bothers her to hear. He knew Rae thought he was good looking, she said it more than enough times (albeit while taking the piss, or in an off-hand kind of way, like – ‘course that girl will go for ya, how could she resist the fittest lad in all of Lincolnshire and the surrounding districts?), but that was just what mates do, and fuck that.

So he goes into detail about his dates, what they did, what made this one special. And Rae rolls her eyes and says – yeah, yeah, they’re all special. When she meets them, if it ever goes that far, she’s the kindest, nicest person to them, and he watches her befriending the girls when deep down he’s hoping she’ll throw a wobbler. From time to time comes along a girl that Rae thinks is a twat, or kinda dumb, or likes the wrong music, and then she’s snobbish and bitchy to her, and him and her have an argument about it, and secretly he loves that, he imagines that she’s sick with jealousy, can’t sleep and can’t think of him with any other girl but her.

Sometimes he fancies that she really does feel that way about him, but she’s just as good an actress as he is and covers her true feelings. When he shares his sex life with her, she reacts the way he would, if she ever told him anything about her sex life. Which she doesn’t. They can talk about her insecurities and how she feels like no one will ever love her, and he can reassure her that it’s bullshit and she’s beautiful, and they can talk about how she doesn’t believe him. And when he tells her she’s attractive she says – all evidence to the contrary – and they can go back and forth about that for hours, but they never talk about any real experiences she’s having.

He knows she goes on dates, very sparsely, like, once in a blue moon, and nothing much happens when she does. And he’s sad for her because she’s sad, but he’s glad for himself because he’s a petty little fucker.

He doesn’t get why on earth she would not have dates. Doesn’t know if it’s because no one is asking her, or because she turns them down for some reason. With all their mutual soul searching, they never go into that. Finn knows that Rae is considered “a big girl”, and she has a way about her, kinda loud and boisterous, and some guys don’t like that. So he kinda gets it but he doesn’t get it, ‘cause, yeah, she’s big, some people might call her fat (they just better not do it within his earshot), but can’t they see that she’s also, just… incredible? He thinks she’s gorgeous. The funniest, most interesting, fucking sexiest person he knows. Sometimes he doesn’t know how he got so lucky as to have her in his life, but sometimes he feels like fucking Job, cursed with this relationship, this fucking friendship with a girl that is perfect for him in every way, except that he’s a coward and he never told her, and she hates herself so she doesn’t even notice.


And he can’t say anything now, it’s too late, it’s way past late. It’s been more than three years and she’s told him very intimate details about herself and all her little fears, and he’s so proud that he’s the one she tells, he’s the keeper of all her shit. All her insecurities about herself and how she hates her body, the way she used to hurt herself when she was younger – she’s doing so much better, and he’s a part of what changed for her. All that hurt was before she’d met him, he reminds himself some nights when she’s in a bad way and he can’t sleep with worry over her. He has to believe that their friendship made a difference, that having him and the rest of the gang in her life, constantly telling her in different ways how much she’s wanted and important – made her stronger, less sad, less likely to hurt herself if shit goes bad. She can come talk to him in the middle of the fucking night if she needs, and she knows that, and he has to believe that makes a difference. What makes that possible is trust, they have trust.

So he can’t very well turn around and tell her that there was something else going on all these years, can he. That every time she’d climbed into his bed to cry on his shoulder, half of him was with her, while the other half was busy trying to conceal her effect on him. Forever aware that he can’t change things, Finn’s just watching his life unfold next to hers, completely miserable and completely happy at the same time. The moments come, and he lets them go.


the last train ride

I thought I wouldn’t have time to write another post for this blog till I got home, but today while riding my last train in Switzerland I was struck with the need to write a journal entry. At first I thought I would just keep it for myself, but then I decided that I’d show you all a glimpse into the thoughts of an exchange student shortly before the death of the life she knew in her host country. Here’s what I wrote on the last train ride, uncensored and unedited. 

“Gleis 15, bitte vorsicht. Der Zug fährt ab.”

I don’t have a camera anymore (the reason for which will be shortly revealed), so I sadly cannot visually record my last journey by train through this incredible country. In the hopes to preserve this moment, I’ll capture it in the only way I can- with words.

White walls. Grey and blue striped carpet. Navy seats and a tray table that reminds me too much of the one in the airplane that i’ll be getting on in just over 12 hours. 

The 5 o’clock sun streaming in through a giant window to my right is shining through my water bottle and creating a crystalline design on the back of the seat in front of me. The water sloshes, making me thing of the vast ocean that I will be hovering over for an unorthodox amount of time.

I see the tracks of steel dance by through the corner of my eye, signifying that I’m facing backwards and it makes me realize that this is me being rewinded, rolled back, pulled away from Switzerland and towards America, where money is dirty and the water tastes bad and trains don’t exist and neither will any of the people of places or things I saw this year and why does everything in this life have to be a metaphor for something???

We’re in a tunnel. The darkness outside the glass makes me question myself. Did I use this year to the best of my abilities? Could I have done better? Do I have regrets? What have I achieved? Did this year even happen or was it all a dream?

Then the tunnel ends and my eyes meet the light, the blue sky, the vibrant green leaves, the tall, strong trees, the crystal clear waters, and I know. I know I did enough and more. I know I saw what I could and tried as hard as I could and took every opportunity and lived in Switzerland, and no, I don’t mean the typical-21st-century-brainless-bob kinda living, where you go to school every day from seven till two and come home to eat and watch tv and sleep and repeat the whole damn thing until you don’t even know who you are anymore. I mean real living, where you survive off of the excitement of adventure on the horizon, where you see things you never thought you would and do things you never thought you could and squueeeezzeee the juice out of every single day and drink it for breakfast the next morning, fueling your next wild adventure. 

I came. I learned. I conquered. I thrived. and I’m so sorry that that sounded too much like one of those poorly-written rap songs overplayed on every single radio station that keep popping up when you’re just looking for some good real music to jam out to.

With every ray of sun that shines across this paper, I’m reminded of the smile of one of the thousands of people whose paths crossed mine sometime this year and who changed my life forever. With every passing village, I’m reminded of all of the adventures I had scattered throughout the cobblestone streets and wide-open fields and magical mountains and moonlit nights this country gave to me.

A baby starts crying and I’m reminded of the sadness I felt during those low points. Those moments when I longed for the home an ocean away, for the family and friends waiting for my return back home, for the experiences I missed out on- for homecoming and prom and spirit week and graduation and seeing my high school classmates off as we all choose a college and a future. 

But then I hear someone yap into a cell phone in Spanish, and I know that without this year I would have never had friends who grew up hearing the same melody every minute back home in Colombia or Spain or Ecuador or Mexico or friends whose tongues first learned to spit Chinese or Portuguese or Japanese or friends who have made the hard moments easier or friends who have become my family.

I hear the bounce of swissified high german across the aisle and know that without this year I never would have even thought to learn such a funny and complicated language, that I never would have discovered that those who speak it are some of the most loving and responsible and thoughtful and punctual and caring people this world can offer, that I never would have experienced the rich culture behind the cows, the chocolate, the knives, the cheese, the mountains, the edelweiss, the yodel-aye-hee-hoo, the stereotypes which are actually kind of accurate but don’t even begin to describe what a beautiful place this country really is. 

I look out of the window one more time and see the mountains that have stood by me throughout this whole year, that have mesmerized me and have kept me on my feet both literally and metaphorically and have reminded me to be brave, strong, and as sharp as the pointed peak of the Matterhorn. 

I know that without this year, I never would have grown. Never would have succeeded. Never would have dreamed. Never would have appreciated.

Because you can’t grown without making mistakes, and Switzerland taught me plenty about how to make those.

Because you can’t succeed if you never have failures, and Switzerland has seen a little too many of mine. 

Because you can’t reach for what you don’t know you want, and Switzerland has taught me to desire to learn and travel and live and enjoy what this life has to offer. 

Because you can’t appreciate what you’ve never lived without, and while Switzerland has been the best rollercoaster I’ve had the pleasure of riding, my time away from America has made me so damn thankful for its friendly people and big streets and massive cities and tiny towns and cactus and oceans and forests and variety and its constant motion and its never-ending optimism. It’s made me realize how lucky I am- to have the family, friends, community, and life that I did, that I will have again in the mere blink of an eye. 

I know that without this year I could have never compared to the strong, powerful, sure, and hopeful mountains I’m staring at right now. 

But now I can. 

Switzerland has prepared me for the world. It has sent me through hell and ice and heaven and paradise, and now I’m ready to face my future with a smile on my face and wide-open arms.

“Geschätzte fahrgäste, wir treffen uns kurz pünktlich in Basel SBB ein.” 

I step out of the train and ride the escalator to the top level of the train station that has seen me at 6 in the morning on the way to a hike and at lunchtime as I met up with some exchange students to show them around the city that stole my heart and at midnight alongside my swiss friends as we tore up the town. 

A sea of people flows through the halls, sending little rivers of bobbing heads off towards each platform, sending people off on their way to their destinations.

I hope they know they’re so damn lucky- to be here, in such a unique city, in such an awe-inspiring country, experiencing such a beautiful life. I hope they enjoy the ride.

My train ride is over, and so is my time. My life in Switzerland is about to come to a close, just like the automated doors on the SBB trains.

Switzerland, thank you for being such a wonderful teacher, parent, lover, and friend. What I’ve taken from you has been etched into my heart and soul and can never be removed. Du wirsch immer e teil vo mir bliebe. 

America, I’ll see you soon. I’ve changed a lot, but don’t worry- I’ll never get rid of my stars and stripes. Xx

peppermint-tchaikovsky-deactiva  asked:

Hi, I love your blog! Would you please write a modern AU fic where Achilles and Patroclus get engaged. Thank you!

Patroclus gripped the small box in his pocket as anxiety and anticipation shook his hands.  It would be fine.  He kept reminding himself that Achilles loved him just as much as Patroclus loved him, no matter how unlikely it seemed.  Achilles was the sun personified, his light reaching every edge of the world, and he loved the background shadow that was Patroclus.  In this world of impossible things, Achilles loved Patroclus.

They were camping, had decided to isolate themselves for a long weekend and hike through the mountains. Halfway through the first day, Achilles had found a spot so perfect that he refused to set up camp anywhere else. It was a cave, its walls sparkled with pink crystals and Patroclus couldn’t imagine finding a better place to do it.  If, for some unknown reason, Achilles wanted to marry him then Patroclus would want to remember the proposal as perfect and this cave was just that.

“You’ve been quiet.” Achilles said.  “Have you changed your mind?  Do you wish to head home?”

“No.”  Patroclus said quickly, shaking his head.  He took a moment to breathe in the fresh air and appreciate the way Achilles’ golden hair reflected off of the rose quartz of the cave. “I am just happy.”

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March 17th, 2014 - The Rocky Road to Dublin


March 17th, 2014 – The Rocky Road to Dublin

America was glad that England was visiting him. Really, he truly was. But the Englishman had a knack for picking crummy dates to visit. On paper March seemed positively ideal. But March 17? America may as well have stepped on a landmine. America loved St. Patrick’s Day, just as he loved all holidays, but this was a holiday best left alone when England was around.

Too bad that was just not how America rolled.

“You know you might feel better if you got out of this bar?” said America. He had finally caught up to England after the other had rushed through the afternoon’s activities. “The whole point of a bar crawl after a good workout is to go to more than one bar you know.”

“Yes,” said England. “But at least this bar is tasteful enough to not be spewing an unnecessary amount of green today. And whoever came up with drinking beer after exercise being a good thing?”

“Hey! I would have been just as happy going home and drinking chocolate milk but I thought you would want to hit the bar instead after you apparently ‘stewed in silent agony’ during the entire Shamrock Run.”

A shudder went through England at the reminder and he slammed his head down on the bar top.

“I hate everything,” said England. His voice was muffled by the wood but still crisp enough for America to catch every word.

“No you don’t,” said America. Clearly he wasn’t going to resolve this problem quickly so he pulled up a stool next to England’s and sat down.

“Yes, I do,” said England.

“You should be thankful that we’re not in New London, Wisconsin or something – although they’re calling it New Dublin for the day. Or in Chicago where they dye the whole river green!” said America.

England was unresponsive towards America’s condolences.

“You didn’t bat an eyelash at my green eggs and ham this morning,” America continued. “I didn’t even have time to decorate this year.” Still with no response from England America forged on, “At least we got through the run alright.”

That last comment certainly set England off. He was now half standing out of his chair, snarl on his face, eyes smiting America into the ground.

“Alfred, there were shamrocks everywhere – everyone was – IS – proudly proclaiming their utter dislike of me, of England.”

America brought up his hands in mock surrender. He got it. He did. But it was just a holiday. Not his fault. There were lots of crazy holidays for lots of crazy things and original meanings usually got lost in the mix quite quickly.

“Nobody goes by that stuff anymore – especially here,” said America.

“But I remember that time and it’s not a nice thing to remember,” England shot back. Still, he had deflated a bit and had returned to staring into the remainder of his surprisingly good beer.

“Then just look at me – a green monstrosity of mismatch colors and not a shamrock in sight.”

“And you’re just going to ignore the orange here and there in your outfit?” said England. “Catholics and Protestants working together for a fashion disaster? What will be next?”

“Again, no one even knows that anymore – and better yet they really don’t care. Nearly everyone wearing green today probably isn’t even Catholic! It doesn’t matter. It’s just a fun holiday to celebrate more of my immigrants. Anyone can celebrate, not just those of Irish heritage. I’m a collage Arthur – a hodgepodge, a melting pot, a fruit salad or whatever they’re calling it these days!”

England just sighed. He finished the last little bit of his drink and gave America another quick up and down look before ignoring everything but the wood grain of the bar top.

Not one to lose his chance and have England order another drink, America worked quickly to further steer the conversation out of the danger zone.

“Now if we’re not going to the pub a few blocks down that has some really great microbrews then we can head over to my place where I’ve got some corned beef and cabbage cooking in the crock pot!”

“More Irish stuff,” said England. “Goody.”

“Hey now, I let you bypass the Lucky Charms this morning – ”

“We’re ignoring that the leprechauns are not very nice,” England cut in but America barreled on anyway.

“ – and to be honest the corned beef part of the whole thing is quintessentially me! Even you know that it should be Irish bacon or whatever but that was just too darn expensive back in the day so some of my other immigrants told my Irish immigrants that corned beef was the way to go! The rest is history.”

America drew England into a half armed hug as he discreetly threw his credit card at the bartender.

“Think of it this way,” said America. “Be like what Rafiki said 'put your behind in your past and learn from it.’ No…wait, I messed that quote up.”

America stalled for a bit before quickly shifting tracks and continuing on with a new thought, “We should have a Disney movie marathon tonight! Start with The Lion King and 101 Dalmatians and Marry Poppins and Peter Pan and Sword in the Stone and Robin Hood and if we’re not having sex by The Great Mouse Detective I’ve done something wrong!”

England’s shoulders were slightly shaking from trying to hold in laughter at the end of America’s little England-appreciation-via-Disney-movie speech. He moved in closer to America and together they stood up but not before England turned on an extra bit of smolder and said, “I suppose that could be agreeable given the circumstances.”

They got home in record time.


Author’s Note:

Happy St. Patrick’s Day everyone! Actually, it’s a pretty angsty holiday when you throw all the history together but in America – heck, it all boils down to wearing too much mismatched green, drinking too much beer, partying way too hard, and the usual tomfoolery associated with such activities…no history involved whatsoever and you really don’t even have to be Irish. I’d like to point out that New England, Wisconsin does actually change their name on this day and Chicago has been dying the Chicago River green for more than 40 years now. Also, America would never get a Disney quote wrong…he purposely flubbed it to propose the marathon of feel good Disney movies that are blatantly all set in England or based on important English works (note that Lion King is largely influenced by Shakespeare’s Hamlet). The title “Rocky Road to Dublin” is an actual song about an Irish man traveling from Ireland to England and some unfortunate mishaps along the way occur. For those that are wondering, there have been some studies showing that drinking beer after a workout is “better” for you than water but not as good as drinking chocolate milk. Go figure. Lastly, you may have picked up pretty quickly on my personal headcanon that each country in the British Isles has their own personification. I’ve been in the Hetalia fandom for quite a while and originally the character known as Arthur Kirkland before he had a human name used to be referred to as just “England” in the various media that managed to get to the U.S.A. It took a long while for Hima-papa to come down to clarify some stuff and tell us to use “Britain” as the nation name (which most of us ignore anyway unless you are only familiar with the Dubs). I have some very fond memories of the fallout over the name change. It was strange times but it is also a pretty good indicator of who’s been kicking around in the fandom for a while. Sorry for the confusion and my weirdness.