I think the uncomfortable part is you being a camren shipper and always being negative about Lauren I have rarely seen u saying or having a positive opinion on Lauren ever , even when she does good things donate,charity,activism,a good performance u never comment so its more like u only take Lauren as an accessory to ur ship and I feel that ur obviously biased and it's perfectly ok to have all our faves , bt just change the theme of ur blog bcuz its unfair
Okay I know you’ve send me at least 3 asks because in each of them you used the words “biased” and “u” - I thought about giving you a grouped answer but since they address different things then I’m gonna answer each of them.
First off, I never lied about feeling conflicted about Lauren lately, it’s been about a month that I’ve felt that way, pretty much since the whole “wet dreams” incident. I’ve said before that it would feel very hypocritical of me to reblog things about Lauren when I’m not feeling like doing it.
That being said, I’ve been really trying to understand why I’m feeling this way and part of that process has been to talk about it. I’ve talked about it with the people of my chat and I talked about it last night with anons because I think we’re all trying to figure why we’re feeling this way.
I’m talking about it because I love Lauren, I wouldn’t bother trying to understand if I didn’t love her. I could just drop her and say I don’t like her anymore and that’s that, but it truly bothers me because I’ve been investing myself in this ship and those amazing ladies for over a year now and I truly care about them and respect them.
I don’t really see what you mean by me using Lauren as an accessory to the ship - to me Camren is it’s own thing, to me it’s separate from Camila and Lauren as individuals, Camren is like a third person because it’s not only about Lauren and Camila, it’s also about the fandom, the inside jokes, the theories, the community and what this ship represents.
I guess it is kinda rare for me to address a subject like the one I’ve been addressing last night because the truth is I always try to keep a positive vibe on my blog, which I think is why some of you guys like it - but you also have to understand that even if this blog is popular I’m also just a regular fan who simply happen to be struggling with one half of her favorite ship right now. I guess it’s been eating at me for a while, whether it’s about Lauren or Ot4, I’ve been having a really hard time being positive about it which is very complicated for me because I am a very positive person at heart and in my everyday life, so I really don’t like being that way and I’m just trying to understand why I am.
I understand how it can seem unfair to you, but right now I’m in that process and to change the theme of my blog would be like saying I’m giving up on this ship and Lauren, which is something I really don’t want to do.
I don’t think you realize how much time I invest into this blog, minimum 2 hours a day, yesterday it was 4 hours - because I always try to give you guys honest and constructed answers, and also I had the not so brilliant idea when starting the blog to use gifs for all of my answers 😂 I’ve been thinking and breathing Camren and 5H everyday for more than a year now and sometimes it’s quite exhausting to always try to get my message across and really make you understand that none of my opinions come from a place of hate, when more than half of you just don’t take the time to read my answers. It’s really easy for anons to just drop by and say how they feel because there’s no consequences, but when I answer it’s me answering. And no matter how much nuance I put in my answers some of you guys always end up seeing things in black and white. My feelings about the girls are much more complicated that just a like/hate matter. Just because I don’t like their behavior sometimes doesn’t mean I don’t love them, just like loving them doesn’t mean I have to like everything they do.
I get that I’ve been on the negative side with Lauren when I could have been focused on the positive but right now I can’t for some reason. I’m probably gonna stop talking about that subject today, cause I’m already tired of it. But I’d like to say one more time that none of my answers come from a place of hate and neither are the asks that I answer, at least I don’t think so, because I’ve received hate asks about Lauren and trust me you can feel the difference.
I guess I’m done with this ask, I hope you can now understand why I won’t change my blog name or stop sharing my opinion even if unfortunately it’s not a positive one because I feel like honesty is a good policy and even a negative opinion, as long as it’s shared with respect, is a valid opinion.
But if you can’t get on board with that sweets then you still have the very simple possibility of just unfollowing me.
I gotta ask, what's it like to read something like that, where some awesome fanfic writer takes some quest you wrote and writes this gorgeous piece based on it? Does it ever intimidate you when designing stuff thinking about people's possible reactions?
It’s humbling. I work very hard to do what I do to the best of my ability, but I know for a fact that there are other members of this community who care just as much about this game. There are even folks who know more about it than I do. I’m just the lucky one.
What I feel, when I see something like that gorgeous piece of fiction, is evidence that I am home. Home among writers and creatives and fanatics for this whimsical universe which can alternately make you laugh, cry, and murder Nightborne by the droves.
I’m so glad I was able to read it, and that it exists, and that we are all here in this same space to talk about it. I hope I can continue to deliver these experiences in the future.
honestly can we PLEASE stop adding “i see you not reblogging this” and the like to sj posts
like i get the impulse bc Yes, a lot of the time people will willfully ignore posts that make them a little uncomfy about their privilege but. id actually rather uhhhh not have these discussions be based around guilt tripping and other behaviors that lead to allies reblogging posts less for their content and more as a performative way of showing “check me out! IM not ignoring this!!”
one of my favorite moments in baby driver is when they play baby’s ‘was he slow’ mixtape and everyone goes from being ready to murder baby to being really, really embarrassed for him. bats looks like he can’t even comprehend what he’s hearing. buddy looks personally betrayed that he thought baby was cool when he was actually just a lame nerd this whole time. kevin spacey can barely look at him, and when he does, his expression screams ‘i can’t believe i ever called you my crime-son. i did not raise you to be this way.’
meanwhile darling’s just over in the corner like ‘THIS IS MY JAAAAAAM’