but we don't know anything about anna so i do what i want

destielisgonnabecanon  asked:

hey there, i'm writing an essay about how destiel is real for a friend of mine and I was wondering what you think the most important pieces of meta that i should put in? can you recommend anything?

Hi - wow, that’s some dedication. All I did for my friends was send them some links - and, on one memorable occasion, I spent one entire 30 minutes conversation occasionally glancing at my (female&blinded by heteronormativity) friend’s lips instead of looking at her eyes, and by the end of it she was uncomfortable af and half convinced I was into her, and that’s when I presented her with a list of gifsets like -

- and basically dropped my mic and sashayed out.

(Man, I wish my hair was long enough to be flicked back.)

She changed her mind after that, by the way. And it’s really weird how most behaviours and gestures are used on screen precisely because we understand them as human things we all do on a deep level, and yet we’re suddenly unable to figure out what they mean if they’re not about a man and a woman. Uh.

(That applies to me as well, by the way. We see what we know about, not what is actually there, and that’s just inevitable - but can be unlearned, with some patience and many, many mistakes.)

Anyway, here are a bunch of things - I hope they’re useful.


Also, the entire S8, which was basically a demented Jane Eyre AU, and the entire S11, because, again, that Amara thing didn’t make sense without Destiel subtext, and finally @deanswingsbothways’ drunken rant (spoiler: contains the line “Destiel is not a story we are telling each other. Destiel is a story we are being told.” and bless).

You should also consider pimping your essay a bit, because there are a lot of posts and gifsets about how Destiel is regularly paralleled with canon couples on Supernatural, or follows the same rules as romantic relationships in movies. Here’s a bunch of them: Destiel and Sam/JessDestiel vs Dean/AnnaDestiel vs Sam/Amelia, Destiel vs David/VioletDestiel and Spuffy, Destiel and Clexa, Destiel and Phoebe/ColeDestiel vs Charlie/Gilda, Destiel vs every other couple on SupernaturalDestiel and Lucifer having funDestiel and romantic movies, Destiel and the Doctor, Destiel and Belle/Rumplestiltskin, Destiel and Tangled, Destiel and Saileen, and, of course, the beautiful and despairing trainwreck that was Repo Man.

And finally, there was that one time I went crazy and spent an entire weekend mapping every single love trope they’ve ever used around those two idiots in love, because I was just that fed up and the thing’s there, okay, and the more they say it’s not the more layers of tropes and mirrors and longing glances and narrative parallels they keep slathering on top of this thing, so, whatever and who even knows. At this point, you’re free to say it’ll never go canon because they’re homophobic or assume their audience is homophobic, and you’re free to say it’ll never go canon because of internal narrative reasons (God knows both Dean and Cas are never going to believe they’re actually good enough for each other), but to say there’s nothing there at all - that’s beyond whatever.

Anyway, my post is here, and these were the final conclusions:

As you may have guessed, this is something I’m sort of interested in - I came for the monsters and started to reblog stuff out of spite when I realized I was being treated like a crazy fangirl who sees love everywhere because women (right). If you’re looking for more sugary goodness, I tag stuff as destiel, spn meta (my own opinions), awesome meta (other people’s opinions), love tropes and parallels, and you can also have a look at some excellent meta writers who have eyes and therefore see Destiel and sometimes discuss it - people like @elizabethrobertajones​, @grey2510​, @tinkdw​, @bluestar86​, @mittensmorgul​, @floralmotif​, @k-vichan, @treefrogie84, @thevioletcaptain or @postmodernmulticoloredcloak (and I know I’m forgetting someone - that’s what sleeping four hours does to you, sorry). So, again - I know this post is a bit ‘join our cult’ (which is what you asked for, but still), but really - what I like about this fandom is that we can talk about stuff and we can disagree about stuff and still be friends, but this new idea currently spreading in the real world like wildfire - that not only you can have your own opinions (totally legit), but you can also have your own facts - nope. I hope your friend reads your essay (you’re welcome to share it, by the way) and sees that yes, there’s objectively something going on. If they still don’t, the final test is, “What if Cas were a woman? Would you see it then?” 

(And we all know the answer to that question, don’t we?)

Seriously, good luck.


EDIT - More great meta

( @destielisgonnabecanon - you’re welcome! Go win that bet! 😁)

"why don't you like frozen?"
  • what i mean: It's a film that, essentially suffers from an existential crisis throughout the entire two hours it runs. There's no world building whatsoever, leaving too many unanswered questions the audience in regards to the magic and lore of the land. It's inferred the trolls know everything there is to know about magic, but it does not explain how Elsa recieved her powers in the first place, leaving a pretty big unanswered question. Also, the decision to take a fantasy race usually isolated from magicks as the main sage magicians was an ...interesting choice, and would have worked out a bit better if the world was built up more. The plot is all over the place, with there being no clear antagonist until the final arc of the movie. Is the Duke of Weaselton supposed to be the antagonist? No, and he honestly doesn't even belong in the movie: in what way does this character move forward the plot? He doesn't, so why is he given such emphasis? Is Elsa supposed to be the antagonist? Through the film the audience is constantly being given conflicting views as to whether or not we are supposed to sympathsize with her or hate her, and we're never given our answer until the final arc of the movie, which is, ironically, when the real antagonist show his face: Hans. Since he is introduced as he antagonist in the final arc, it makes Hans' development as a villain feel rushed and unnatural. Such a sudden heel-face turn from charming benevolent prince to cold-blooded killer feels wrong, and considering there was no foreshadowing or dramatic irony leading up the reveal, it comes as a shock to even the most watchful moviegoers. Beyond the shock response, there is no reason for the audience to hate Hans, making him an ineffective villain all in all. The audience only hates him because he betrayed the trust that was willingly given in the first half of the film. Yes, he wants to usurp the throne and kill everyone off, but wouldn't that incentive be more effective if it were presented as such from the beginning of the movie? Give the viewers hints and clues that he is not what he seems, making the reveal of his plan much more suspenseful. Additionally, if it were addressed from the beginning, a large amount of the aimless plotless wandering that plagued most of the first three-quarters of the movie would be practically non-existant. In addition, the shock factor response wears off eventually; the impact of his betrayal means less and less to the audience each time they watch it. Part of the reason of the weakness and confusion in the beginning also stems from the fact that the movie is trying to juggle too many characters. Many named characters are completely unneeded and did not need to steal screentime (and by extension, valuble character development) from the main characters (Anna, Elsa, Kristoff, and I guess Hans). And the lack of character development is bad. Really bad. Anna doesn't feel like a real person, even by Disney standards. Elsa is a bit more believable, but her "development" is rushed and inferred instead of shown to the audience as it should be. Why was there such an emphasis on the parents in the beginning if they were only going to be killed off for plot fuel? And as an audience member, I did not feel any sadness for their death or for how Anna and Elsa were grieving. Having Elsa locked in her room for upmost of ten years was just...weird. There was absolutely nothing that justified it, making the isolation feel like a cheap way out for the writers to transition from childhood to adulthood. And beyond that, Arendelle is shown to be a peaceful kingdom, so it makes no sense that Anna would not be allowed to leave the castle and walk amongst the city. If magic exists in this world, why was Elsa locked away? Why was it a secret? All of these questions stem from weak worldbuilding that justifies very little of the events of the movie. There are so many unanswered questions that rise up from what happens inbetween childhood and adulthood. Is there a puppet monarch? Was magic seen as something negative or unknown? Why the trolls. Why the trolls. I'm sorry I just do not understand the trolls. The romantic subplot again ties into making the trolls feel even more forced and unneeded and the Hans reveal stale, I don't need to go into this. From a technically standpoint, the animation is subpar compared to its contempararies. Rise of the Guardians, a movie made a year before Frozen, had better ice effects. The particle effects and textures were nothing to write home about and the numerous clipping issues are clear evidence that the final product was rushed. The character design is the biggest complaint everyone has heard the most, but, Jesus Christ, oh my god it's bad. There's virtually no variation in character design. The facial structure of all the women are practically identical. Elsa, Anna, their mother, even Rapunzel all look 100% identical. Perhaps that wouldn't be such a problem if their body types were the same as well. There's no power of silouette in the film, something that is absolutely crucial to animated film, making Anna and Elsa blend together not only in the film, but in the industry itself. They do not stand out. They are blank and bland. The music is the only good thing, and that's only considering some songs. "Let it Go" and "First Time in Forever" are strong, powerhouse showtunes that actually move the plot forward, as songs in a musical should, but "Fixer-Upper" and "Love is an Open Door," while good, solid songs, do relatively nothing for the plot can could be omitted without sacrificing anything. "In Summer" is a total joke song that literally fades into nothing--I could not recall the tune if I tried, and "Do You Wanna Build a Snowman?" has a lot of potential but is, esentially, the same chorus repeated with little to no transition three times. It doesn't help that the song is also the most awkward contrived timeskip in the history of awkward contrived timeskips, again because it is never explained why Elsa is locked in her room at all. And the trolls and the--oh god. Please, all artists and writers, do NOT overlook the importance of worldbuilding. Even the dialogue is mediocre and does nothing to immerse the characters into the world around them. The resulting product is nothing but two hours of mediocrity masquerading as the best film of the decade in commercialization and ticket sales, but ultimately does nothing but leave a bad taste in the audience's mouth and will encourage Disney to continue making mediocre movies because they know they will sell and sell well.
  • what i say: because it's a bad movie
Just A Friend - J.A.

Summary: Having a best friend in high school is the best thing anyone could wish for, but your best friend moves away before graduation. Even though you kept contact with each other, there’s still somethings you have to say to each other. 

Requested by @simplywdw-fp

You and Jack sat in his bed, you were looking through Instagram on your phone and Jack was singing, practicing for his new YouTube video.

You laid down content, slowly falling asleep to the sound of your best friend signing. 

Jack stopped signing, looking over to you. He smiled to himself when he saw your eyes close, thinking you were asleep. 

“Why’d you stop?” You whined like a child, rubbing your eyes. 

“Thought you were asleep, didn’t want to wake you.” He mumbled, walking over to lay down next to you. 

“I was falling asleep to the sound of your voice.” You explained, laying your head on his chest as he wrapped his hands around your waist. 

“You staying over tonight?” He whispered in your ear, covering you with a blanket. 

You hummed as an answer, hugging him tighter than you were. Jack began singing softly, stroking your hair as you fell asleep. 

Give me love like her
‘Cause lately I’ve been waking up alone
Paint splattered teardrops on my shirt

You smiled to yourself, happy to be able to call him your best friend. 

Told you I’d let them go
And that I’ll fight my corner
Maybe tonight I’ll call ya

Suddenly, you felt your smile fall. But I want to be able to call him more than my best friend. 

After my blood turns into alcohol
No, I just wanna hold ya

I want to call him my boyfriend. That was your last thought before you fell asleep, and you didn’t hear what Jack said right after. 

“I just want you to love me, the way I love you.” He whispered as he kissed your forehead. 


“What!” You yelled out, tears gathering in your eyes.

“I’m moving to L.A! I’m going to to start a band!” Jack exclaimed excitedly, becoming in patient and running towards you. He picked you up and spun you around. 

“That’s great Jack!” You couldn’t help the giggles that left your lips when he put you down. You stared into his eyes, the reality of the situation setting in. 

You felt a small tear fall, running down your face before you could stop it. 

“What’s wrong?” Jack raised his hand and gently swiped the tear away with his thumb. 

“Nothing.” You mumbled, looking at the floor as you felt more tears coming. 

“Hey.” He lifted your head up, his hands on the side of your face. “I know something’s wrong, you can tell me.” 

“It’s just… I’m so proud of you, I am. And I know you’re going to go far with this band of yours, but..” You started to look at the floor again. 

“But what?” 

“But what about us? I’m going to stay here and graduate by myself, without my best friend.” You whimpered, the thought of being without your best friends on such an important day scaring you. 

“I’ll still be your best friend.” You looked up at him, smiling sadly. “And I’ll be here for graduation, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” You leaned into his hand, reaching yours to stroke it. 

“You promise?” 

“Promise.” 


And he kept his promise, texting and calling you every chance you got. You thought the distance would make your feelings for Jack fade, but they just made them stronger. 

You: Hey :(

Jack: Hey! What’s with the face? 

You: I miss you </3 

Jack: lol 

You: It’s not funny >:( 
You: Do you not miss me? D’: 

Jack: Of course I miss you
Jack: But what’s with the faces? 
Jack: Just use emojis lol

You: No. D:< 
You: I like them :P

Jack: Okay… 

You: Tell me you miss me! >:( 

Jack: I already did?

You: With the face :(

Jack: …
Jack: No. 

You: Then don’t bother coming tomorrow, I don’t want you here >:( :P 

Jack: FINE!
Jack: I miss you…

You: …?

Jack: :( 

You: :D

Jack: I have to go :( 
Jack: I’ll see you tomorrow?
Jack: Hello?

You: Oh!
You: Sorry, I was texting someone else

Jack: r0od 

You: >.< Sorry

Jack: Who was it?

You:Just some guy from school

Jack: I have to go. 

You: Okay! 
You: I can’t wait to see you tomorrow! 
You: Goodbye, Jack <3 
You: Jack???

Jack: Bye. 

You stared at your phone in confusion, not knowing what made him so moody all of a sudden. You shrugged your shoulders, planning on asking him about it when you saw him the next day. 

*After the ceremony* 

You tried your hardest to find Jack before and during the ceremony, but you couldn’t find him anywhere. You even texted him during the ceremony, receiving no response from him, but you knew he read them. 

“Sweetie! Congratulations!” You parents pulled you in for a hug, squeezing you hard. 

“Thanks mom have you seen Jack?” You asked nervous that he missed your graduation. 

“I think I did, actually. Over there by the restrooms.” You glance towards the restrooms, seeing Jack stand there with a group of people. 

“Jack!” You smiled widely, rushing over to see your best friend. Jack slowly turned, making eye contact with you. 

“(Y/N)! Congrats, I knew you could do it!” He hugged you, holding you tight for almost a minute. 

“You came.” You mumbled, holding onto him as if your life depended on it. 

“Of course I came, I told you.” He let go of the hug, holding you at arms length. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

“I just, you left kinda moody yesterday and you weren’t responding to my text.” You looked down, finding the ground very interesting. “I thought you were mad at me.” 

Jack let go of you. “I could never be mad at you.” He removed your cap, patting your head and messing up your hair.

Before you could respond, a girl walked up to Jack. “Jack!” She squealed and hugged him. 

“Hey, Anna! How are you.” Anna. This girl has had the biggest crush on Jack since she laid eyes on him. She hated your guts, and you’d never admit it but you hated hers. 

“Fine, how about you?” She flirted with him, twirling her hair and every other cliche thing in the book. 

You stood there, feeling like a third wheel. After a while you grew annoyed, walking away to find someone else.

“(Y/N)! Hey, we did it!” Andrew, your friend, picked you up from behind and spun you around. 

“Put me down Andy!” You squealed, giggling like a child when he finally set you down.

“(Y/N)?” Jack came up to you, his eyes looked at you in confusion. 

“Oh, Jack! I want you to meet someone.” You grinned at him, pulling Andrew next to you. 

Jack didn’t show it, but his heart broke. I’m too late, she found someone. 

Maybe if you didn’t move away, that would be you. Jack scolded himself, but smiled towards you. 

“This is Andrew, Andy for short. He’s my -” 

“Boyfriend.” Jack extended his hand, going to shake it. Andy looked at you confused, politely taking Jacks hand. 

“No, he’s just a friend. A really close friend, but that’s it.” You explained confused, glancing at Andy. 

“Besides,” Andrew spoke up, smirking at you. ”She likes someone else.” Your eyes widen, silently begging him not to say anything. 

“And after meeting you, I can see wh- OW!” Andy raised his hands up in defense, moving away from you. 

“I’m going to kill you, I swea-” Before you could finish your threat, Andy ran away. 

“So…” Jack stared at you, emotionless.

You stood still, not wanting to move and have him tell you he didn’t feel the same. 

“I like you, a lot. Hell, I love you.” You confessed, closing your eyes. 

“Oh, thank god.” You felt someone’s lips on yours. Smiling to yourself, you kissed back. 

Thank god indeed.


I hope this is the happy ending you wanted! It just felt like a good place to end it. 

Also, I might not post another imagine until Thursday night! I have a class in the afternoon and it’s my last week, so I’m going to be very busy! I should be working right now but I like writing so much more :/ 

And I just might change my name to just jonahjunkie tell what you think about that (like should i change it or not)

prettyboydean  asked:

HELLO I WOULD LIKE TO REQUEST ONE (1) FIC PLEASE, IT GOES LIKE THIS: Your window was open and you live across from me so I saw and heard you in your underwear, singing and dancing ridiculously and I really wanna get to know you cause you’re pretty hot and I might have a crush on you. - with Destiel obvs 💙

I hope you like Moana, I’m a huge fan of Disney-enthusiast!dean okay… this turned out pretty random and weird I maybe need more sleep


When finals are close, Castiel likes to spend his free weekends in his room, studying. There’s nothing else he does except for the necessary things like groceries and dinner, and trying to get Gabriel out of his room. He uses all the silence he can get to concentrate, and his family lets him.

He is in one of his study sessions, books and notes spread out all over his desk when a sudden sound makes him jump up. At first, he thinks it’s Gabriel listening to music again, but he soon realizes that can’t be. First of all, it’s coming from outside Castiel’s window and not from the hallway. Secondly, Gabriel doesn’t listen to Disney songs.

Castiel puts his pen down. It doesn’t make sense, but he’s sure it’s a song from that movie his little sister Anna likes to watch. That new one, Moana.

He pushes himself away from his desk and gets over to his window.

Across from him is Dean Winchester’s room- Castiel can’t say he doesn’t know. He’s been trying to sneak a glimpse of the guy for as long as he can remember. Now his curtains are wide open and so is his window. Castiel looks again and almost dives away when Dean suddenly appears, but he doesn’t see Cas. He’s dancing through his room, arms widely spread and jumping onto his bed and down to the floor, singing along to the lyrics Castiel only vaguely knows.

The worst (or best) part is that he’s only wearing boxers.

Keep reading

Breaking... Ch.24

Masterlist

Part 21 Part 22 Part 23

A/N: …

Wordcount: 4946

Warnings:

Tags…: @iamnotthrowingawaymyshit @renae-writes @deltablue202 @literally-melonkitty @meunicorn @favouritefighting-frenchman @demi-godamit @gum-and-chips @sweaterkitty-fluff@pinkyiger7 @littlemissshortcakes@msageofenlightenment @unprofessional-inhumanbeing @fandom-panda-221@hummusandchips @spoopy-piineapple @ashwolfcub@myself-and-the-madman @sweet-fate @superwholockbooknerd526 @frozengal2013 @itsmikayblr @sarmar29 @arya-durin-77 @phantastic-fandoms@hoshihime98 @shinigamired @martapetrovic @robotic-space @iamnotthrowingawaymyshit2 (lol) @asprinkleofmermaids @pinkyiger7​ (I’m tagging you twice my friend!) @satellitesuga @rose-coloured-nihilism @okie-dokie-artichokeme @alyssumax@pandartist @marquiis-de-la-baguette@abi-sans05

Broken

Just as you had suspected, this was all Lafayette’s idea. Honestly, you should’ve expected that with how cryptic he was being before. He said that Alex and Philip can be very similar sometimes, he knew some shit like this would work of Alex and that meant it would probably work on Philip as well. Eliza was the second to know about and she let Alex in on it after Philip asked to bring Theodosia. Angie said she just had a feeling something was going on so she joined in. The weird part was that Jefferson wasn’t part of the plan at all. According to Laf, Thomas just wanted to piss off Hamilton, to say it worked would be an understatement.

“That magenta obsessed lunatic! He has the nerve to try and accuse you and then do something so vile? He would be wise to apologize to you for putting you through something so traumatic! That man better not ask me about you or I swear there will be hell to pay.” You told him that that wouldn’t happen but you were wrong. It totally did. You had to hear Alex rant for at least three hours about how disrespectful it is to ask a man about someone who was basically his daughter. Dadexander is back at it again, I see! You knew that this was all just an excuse to make Alex upset but you were honestly touched that he was so protective of you. Angie was probably the most excited.

“I am so happy for you! We already discussed that I am already the bridesmaid, my speech has already been written! Would you like to hear it?” You told her to slow her roll, but she always seemed to know something you didn’t. She was seventeen now and you were always amazed by how incredible she was. She was only a year younger than you were when you first came here, you felt very old all of a sudden just thinking about it. Ever since that night after the ball, you and Philip were inseparable. Eliza helped you learn how to dance properly; Philip was your partner. Alex asked you to help him write papers for him, Philip would sit beside you and make sure you didn’t try and write too fast. There was a moment when you had to bring tea to his room really late at night because he refused to sleep. No matter how many times he insisted that you go to bed, you refused.

“Sunshine, it isn’t fair for me to go to sleep and leave you awake and miserable. Either we both go to sleep and be happy or we both stay up and be cranky. The choice is yours!”

“Ugh! Why do you have to use your beautiful mind against me? Aren’t you supposed to love me or something?”

“I do love you, and that’s precisely why I have to stop you before you pass out and stain your pretty little face with ink.” You pouted.

“Are you trying to say I wouldn’t be pretty if I had ink on my face?” He teased.

“I like your freckles not to be covered in ink so yes. But don’t change the subject, you need to sleep.” He got up from his chair and wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder.

“But I really have to finish this!” He groaned, you felt his hair scratch at your cheek and you giggled.

“No, you really need to sleep, love!” He nuzzled his face into your neck.

“If I go to sleep I can’t see your radiance. What’s a man to do?”

“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,

And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.” You quoted. “As long as your mind holds my image, your eyes will not need me.” That was enough to convince him to go to sleep, you kissed him goodnight and left. You always felt like you were floating after he kissed you, it was like a force of energy would wave over you.

            Lafayette left a couple weeks later, you told him to keep in touch with you. You were glad to have made a new friend out of all that nonsense. Eliza had been slowly taking you off maid duties. She told you that it wasn’t intentional but you got the feeling it was. She would insist that you wear your casual dress more and more. Today was one of those days, however Philip invited you to go into town with him and Angie decided to tag along because she wanted to look for new petticoats. You’d never been out in public with Philip before so you were a bit nervous. Luckily that didn’t last long because as soon as the carriage pulled into the town and you got out with Philip on your arm, that feeling of anxiety melted away. There was a mix of indoor and outdoor shops, the sounds flowed around you. It was chilly outside but you didn’t mind, it was comfortable enough for you. For some you thought of the memory with your last night with Anna. How hot and sticky it was, how close to summer it was, how happy the two of you were. Onism. Philip pulled away from you.

“Would you mind going with Angie for a little bit? I have to go talk to a make an errand really quick.”

“An errand? Alright, I don’t mind. Just be back soon because I don’t want to leave you without a ride back.” You joked, he gave you a peck on the cheek and quickly left you with Angie. She giggled and wriggled her eyebrows.

“You two are simply adorable!” She squealed. “I wish you two would just get married already! I hate this waiting game!” You rolled your eyes.

“I’m sure you do Angie, I’m sure you do.”

“How much longer do you think he’s going to wait?”

“I-I don’t know! I haven’t exactly thought about it! Although, that’s not to say I wouldn’t be opposed to it…” You felt your face heat up, an interesting contrast to the cool air. You and Angie stopped in front of a table displaying various glass pieces. You felt an icy chill roll up your spine, the presence was back. What the hell? It’s happened outside before…

Seven. Three. Seven. Three. Seven.

Why are you doing this?

Help. Don’t run.

Don’t run? What does that mean? You felt something touch your arm, you flinched.

“Hey, TT! Are you alright? You spaced out there!” Angie said with concern. You shivered and shook away the ominous feeling painted against your back.

“Yes, I’m alright, just cold.” You chuckled. The two of you continued to look at the different shops for a while and it gave you time to think. Mrs. Y/N Hamilton… Angie was right, that does sound nice. We don’t have to rush anything; we don’t have to get married any time soon.  I just wonder when, will it be a mutual decision, will it be spur of the moment, will it be carefully planned out? Ugh, I feel ridiculous. What am I, a soccer mom? Well, soccer isn’t really a thing here yet, I guess. Your thoughts were interrupted by Angie.

“Oh would you look at that, Philip finally decided to come back and join us!” Your mood instantly perked up as you searched the crowd. Philip was moving past everyone but he didn’t seem happy. To be more precise, he looked completely pissed. He approached the two of you and huffed an uneasy breath.

“Come on, we’re leaving.” What?

“But I haven’t found my petticoats yet!” Angie whined.

“We need to leave! We can come back tomorrow.” He sounded like he was in a rush.

“Philip, what’s going on? Are you okay?” You tried to ask.

“I’ll tell you when we get home, I promise. But we really need to go.” You and Angie followed him to the coach, his leg was bouncing the entire way to the estate. You tried to calm him down a to calm him down but he wasn’t acting like himself. He seemed distraught and antsy. When the carriage pulled into the yard he practically jumped out. As the three of you made it into the house, you asked him what was wrong again. This time he said that he had to talk with Alex first. You suggested that you make tea and that you’d join them, he agreed.

“Don’t say anything too important without me!” You tried to lighten his mood, he leaned forward and kissed your forehead before walking down the hall. You went into the kitchen and quickly prepared the tea, Eliza would kill you if she saw that you were working in your nice dress. You set the cups on a tray with everything else and made your way over to the study. You were about to knock on the door when you heard a passing conversation.

“Where is this happening?” Alex asked. Where’s what happening?

“Across the river in Jersey, everything is legal in New Jersey.” Philip explained. Has he ever been to Jersey?! Nothing is legal there!

“Alright, so this is what you’re going to do. Stand there like a man until Eacker is front of you. When the time comes, fire your weapon in the air. This will put an end to the whole affair.” What…

“But what if he decides to shoot? Then I’m a goner!”

“No, he’ll follow suit if he’s truly a man of honor. To take someone’s life, that is something you can’t shake. Philip, your mother can’t take another heartbreak.” Your hands were shaking, the tray quaking.

“Father…”

“Promise me, you don’t want this young man’s blood on your conscious!”

“Okay, I promise…”

“Come back home when you’re done, take my guns. Be smart, make me proud son.” The tray fell from your hands; glass, tea, cream and sugar spilled across the floor. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

“No!” You yelled as you busted through the door. Alex and Philip jumped in surprise, but Philip was immediately concerned. “You are not going!” You felt tears rolling down your cheeks and stepped over the broken tea set.

“Hey, hey, hey now! Calm down love.” Philip tried to soothe you.

“No! I’m not going to calm down! You are not going to that duel!” Philip laid his hands on your shoulders comfortingly.

“I have to, he disparaged my father’s legacy in front of a crowd. I can’t have that! And he tried to-” He tried to justify. Ellipsism. Your shoulders shook the opposite reason, you interrupted him.

“And I can’t lose you…not again, Philip… please just stay alive for me… Is that too much to ask?” You hiccupped. I just got him back, he is not leaving me again! Philip pulled you into his arms, you buried your face into his chest. “Please don’t go… I love you… The sun has to come out tomorrow….” You clutched onto him, you hated feeling weak but at this point you didn’t care. If showing yourself in a ‘weak’ state was enough to make him stay than you held no qualms. You didn’t care what happened, what would change because of this. You just knew that you needed him to stay.

“Okay, Okay, it’s going to be okay Star! Please stop crying…” You shook your head. Alex stood up from his seat and made his way over to the two of you.

“Titania, I assure you, everything will be alright. You must try and calm down, we don’t want you to have another fit.”

“I won’t go, just please don’t make yourself sick!”  You calmed down a little bit after hearing him say that. He pulled you away and gave you his handkerchief, he tried to help you wipe away your tears with his hands. “Come on now, where’s my sparkle at?” He smiled. You couldn’t stop yourself from cracking a grin. He always knows what to do to make me smile… He told you to grab your Midsummer Night’s Dream book and come back so that you could read a little bit together. You did so and the two of you spent most of the day picking out different parts of the play that stood out to you. You all had dinner together and as the sun set, everyone began to retire for the evening. Now you stood in front of the door to your room, holding Philip’s hand.

“Remember, you promised Angie another trip into town, I’m going to hold you to that!”

“I will, I will! I’m a man of my word after all!” The huge grin on his face changed to a nervous smile. “Um, after breakfast tomorrow, would you mind meeting me in the garden? There’s… something that I…need to ask you. It’s pretty important so…” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

“Of course! I uh, I mean sure, that sounds fine. I’ll see you there.” You tried desperately to keep your cool. He looked down at you with soft eyes and caressed your cheek.

“I love you so, so, so much. I love you more than anything else. You are my fallen star and I would do anything for you, you know that right?” He asked, very seriously.

“Of course I do, Philip. I couldn’t forget that even if I wanted to. You’re the only sunshine that matters to me…” He leaned forward and gently pressed his lips into yours. Yours seemed to fit perfectly with his and the feeling of being stopped in time never changed. He pulled away slightly and you slowly opened your eyes.

“Good… it’s just nice to hear that every once in a while.” He grinned. You are such a cheeseball!

“Well, I’m will to tell you that any time!” You chuckled.

“You’re adorable… I’ll see you in morning, my starlight. I hope you have sweet dreams.” He gave your hand one last squeeze before letting go and making his way down the hall and out of your sights. You went inside your room and closed the door behind you. You ran over to your bed, slammed your head into the pillow and legit screamed. You rolled over and tried to stop smiling, you couldn’t. Philip Hamilton has a very important question to ask me. And he has to ask it in the place where we gave each other our nicknames and shared our first kiss… I WONDER WHAT IT COULD BE! I feel like the only person who could be happier than me about this is Angie! You suddenly felt exhausted. I am emotionally drained… You tried to get up so that you could change your clothes but your body wouldn’t move. What the fuck…? You were paralyzed, your eyes began to shut. Your sight was filled with blackness, there was nothing. You couldn’t breathe, you couldn’t move, you couldn’t see, all you could do was hear.

Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run. Don’t run.

Those words echoed in your mind, over and over and over again. Your eyes shot open but it was dark, you were able to roll out of bed and managed to light the candle on your desk. How long have I been asleep? You looked around and noticed something strange. There was folded up piece of paper laying on the floor. You picked it up and saw ‘My Star’ written on the front. What’s this? You opened it up and began to read its contents.

My dearest Starlight,

                           I write this letter to you with a heavy heart. I could not keep my word to you. As the eldest son, it is my responsibility to shoulder the legacy of my father. Mr. Eacker has sullied the name of not only my family but of you as well. My honor prevents me from backing down against this man’s words, I shall meet him at dawn. If you are reading this, it means that I have not survived the duel. I pray that these letters never meet your beautiful eyes, so that I may see them when the morning comes. I shall not let a tear stray from my eye, I must be strong, if not more myself than for you. Please, take care of my family. They will need you if I am gone. Do not, for a single moment believe that this could be in anyway your fault. My death will be on my hands, no one else’s. It is odd, in the time I need to use my talent in writing the most, I cannot find my words. How does one say goodbye to the person they barely got a chance to be with? My love, it is impossible. What am I to say to you? This letter will have to be short, or else it will be one hundred pages long. I will wait for you, as the world changes and grows so will you. I’ll wait as long as it takes to see your face again. I will bleed and fight for you. If you do read this, do not become stuck on me. Move on, be happy, live your life to the absolute fullest because my love for you will never die, even if I myself do. I will watch over you from the heavens, you shall never be alone. My love, my star, my everything, take your time. I shall see you, one day, on the other side.

With love, P. Ham, your sunshine

            You let the page fall from your hands and flutter to the floor. Dawn… It’s not dawn yet! You ran out of the room, through the hall, into the main room and out the door. You were frantic, you didn’t think about anything you were doing, just moving. Philip, don’t you dare do this to me! You rushed over to the stables and hurriedly led one of the horses out. Sorry to meet you like this old friend… No time for saddles today! You hoisted yourself over and onto the horses back, clutching onto her mane. Sorry if this hurts old girl. You gave her a little kick to the side and she took off, you held on tight to make sure you wouldn’t fall over. You rode into town and saw a few people waking up to prepare for the day, how could everything be so calm? You remembered the path down to the Hudson from the time you and Eliza decided to go for a stroll there. You looked around and saw the sky changing from its deep blue, it was slowly lightening and various other colors peeked from the horizon. The sun’s not up yet, I still have time! You made it to the edge of the river and hopped off the horse. There was a man on a small boat pulling into the dock.

“Excuse me sir! Did you just let a group of men across?” You asked him, completely out of breath. He looked at you incredulously.

“Yes, ma’am. They just rode in not too long ago.”

“Can you take me across? Please!” You begged.

“I can, but aren’t you worried about your horse?” He asked, you ran over to boat and jumped in, it shook under the pressure.

“There’s no time for that! Please!” You reinforced. As he began to paddle the boat across you asked him. “Where did they go?”

“Near Weehawken, ma’am. Crazy fools are looking for a fight, plain as day.” This was the first time you had a chance to process what was happening. I’m coming Philip, don’t do anything crazy! You were starting to feel the weight of guilt. He just had to do this! Why couldn’t I stop him? Was it not enough? Will he never be satisfied? The boat hit the other side and your hurried off, giving the man a pressed thank you. The ground was muddy from the river but the further out you went, the drier it became. The lines in the sky were becoming more and more orange. Tears burnt your eyes as you felt your legs get weaker. I can’t stop! Keep going, damn it! You heard something faint in the distance.

“One!”

The number of years after I realized I loved you. You forced yourself to keep going.

“Two!”

The number of baby’s breath you gave me on our night in the garden. You thought you could see them.

“Three!”

The number of times I had to betray you. You stumbled a bit but kept running.

“Four!”

The years that we’ve been together. You could see him, he raised his gun in the air.

“Five!”

The amount of flowers that were in my hair when you first kissed me and told me you loved me. You saw them marching away from each other, you changed your direction slightly. Left

“Six!”

The number of Hamilton children who love me. You were only a few feet away from him, he saw you.  Your body shot against his.

“Seven!”

Right now. Bang.

            There was a moment, a single moment where everything felt alright. Time had no control over you. History has its eyes on you, and yet you controlled it at the same time. You hugged Philip’s side as the two of you fell. That moment however, was only a moment. And that’s all it took. You felt a shot of pain come from the right side of your forehead. It was excruciating. You landed on the ground, Philip underneath you. Your head banged against his ribcage, something wet rolled down your face and seeped into your right eye. Blood. You felt yourself be moved and Philip was hovering over you. His eyes were filled a mix of terror and denial.

“S-s-star…? Y-you…you’re…” His breathing was heavy and erratic.

“I…made a pretty big entrance…huh?” You tried to laugh but the pain was too much.

“Doctor! Don’t just stand there, help her!” He yelled out, his eyes were glistening. Another man appeared your side and he examined you for a moment.

“This is very serious; we need to get her out her right now! Is there anywhere we can take her that’s close by?” He asked.

“My aunt’s house, it’s just at the edge of city! Ride in the carriage with me and fix her, please!” You sound so overcome…I don’t like that. Philip lifted you up into his arms and ran, your eyes fluttered open and shut. Before you knew it, you were in a carriage, Philip carefully shaking your shoulders. “Don’t fall asleep, my love. How can I see your radiance when you’re asleep? Keep your eyes open for me, don’t stop looking at me. Don’t look at the doctor, just pay attention to me, okay?” You felt something touch the side of your head. Then the musket in your head, the one embedded in your skull, was ripped out. You screamed, you never thought a person could experience something so agonizing. Philip squeezed your hand tightly to try and get your attention. “Shh, I know, I know! I know it hurts, love. But it’s going to be okay! Save your strength, you’ll stay alive!” You reached your trembling hand up and caressed his cheek. A few tears hit the edge of your palm.

“You’re right… So, d-don’t cry, sunny. I’m going to be… just fine…” You felt a cloth hit the gaping hole in your head you winced. The carriage stopped and before you knew it, you were being carried inside a large house. A familiar female voice was asking Philip questions; of which he didn’t know how to answer.

“Go inform Alexander and my sister!” You heard someone run out and shut the door. “Bring her in here, Philip!” He held you close as he rushed into a different room, the only thing you could notice about it were the large windows. The sun was rising, the light filling the room. You were laid onto some sort of sofa, but Philip didn’t leave your side or let go of your hand.

“The doctor is going to clean your wound now; it’s probably going to hurt like hell. But you can handle it! I know you can!” The cloth was peeled off your blood clotted skin, something wet was poured onto your injury. It burned. You bit your lip to stifle another screech. Philip kissed your knuckle. “See? I knew you could handle it!”

“Hey…Philly?”

“Yes, my star?”

“I know I’m going to be fine and all…but it would really help me feel better if we talked for a little bit.”

“Of course, what would you like to discuss?”

“You said that… you wanted to ask me something in the garden… What was it?” You asked breathlessly.

“My plan was to…ask for your hand in marriage. I was going to the ring in the patch of baby’s breath that grows every spring…” He chuckled sadly.

“That…sounds perfect… I feel like the wedding will be beautiful… Angie already declared herself Maid of Honor…” Your breathing was starting to become shallow. “Can you tell me… what happens after that?”

“We’ll get a place in the city, because I know you love the energy there. We’ll start rallies to abolish slavery, our generation will be the one to do it. But we won’t stop there, we won’t stop until everyone is free, all women, immigrants and those like my sister in the likes. It’ll be hard but we’ll always come out on top. Because nothing in this world is stronger than us…” He smiled wistfully. His smile is so perfect…

“I’m glad that… at least one of us had a plan…”

“Has!” He corrected, you nodded.

“Right, silly me. Has.” He took a moment to look at you, he fell apart in front of your eyes.

“This is all my fault! I should have listened to you! If I had, then you’d… then you’d be… I’m so sorry!” You him by the cravat and pulled him in close with all the strength you had in your body. You kissed his cheek, wishing you could do and say more.

“This isn’t your fault, if any one should be sorry it’s me. I’m sorry for not always being there for you, even if I wanted to. I’m so sorry for every time I’ve ever lied to you. I’m sorry for not loving you for as long as I wanted to. Philip, I’m sorry but I couldn’t let you die before me. I did this and I don’t regret it. I’m not sorry for doing this.” You said with a dark tone, he sighed.

“I…don’t know what I’m going to do without you…”

“Live.” His eyes widened. “You’re going to do all those things you said you’d do with me. Even if I’m not there with you. You’re going to live and grow and be happy! This isn’t some Shakespearian tale, we aren’t Romeo and Juliet or Pyramus and Thisbe. Our love didn’t come from some love at first sight encounter. We were friends, we cared about each other, we got mad at one another but that’s what made it real! We grew together and you’re going to keep growing without me. Because you know that’s what I’d want…” It was getting harder to talk but you refused to give up your chance. The doctor took another look at your head, he couldn’t seem to find a way to fix it. You could read his face and you were satisfied with that. You heard footsteps getting louder and louder, a door busted open.

“Come in Mr. Hamilton.” The doctor instructed. You saw faces appear by your side. Alex, Eliza, Angie, AJ, Jamie, Johnny, Willy and Lizzy. Your family was here.

“Philip…what happened?” Alex asked with fear.

“I did exactly as you said Pop…I held my head up high… But even before we got to ten…she was pushing me aside…” Alex looked over at the doctor and he was given the same look you were.

“Is she going to survive this? Who did this? Alexander do you know?” Eliza’s voice was going by a mile a minute. All of this sounded familiar. Your eyesight was fazing in an out, like a camera trying to keep itself in focus.

“I want to say…so many things…But I don’t think I have the strength to… In my room, under my pillow, you’ll find some things that will tell you what I can’t…”

“TT…you’re greatest big sister I could ever hope to have…” Angie sniffled.

“Eliza…” You whispered.

“Yes, dear?”

“Do you remember… how you counted on my first day with you…and the round that we made the warmup?” She nodded. “Could you…and all the children…sing that for me? I think…it would help me feel a little calmer…”

“Of course, dear! Anything for one of my girls!” Her voice cracked. She looked at all the children, they were in tears but were being very brave. I’m so proud of them… You looked at Philip, asking for him to sing for you.

“Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq…” Eliza and all the younger children started, Philip remembered what to do.

“Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf…” He sang to you softly.

“Good…” Your eyes felt heavy.

“Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq…” So tired….

“Un…” You stopped him.

“I love you…” Was the last thing you were able to say.

anonymous asked:

My memory is really fuzzy on past SPN eps, what exactly is the "sacred oath"? I personally don't see Cas ever caring about sex like dean does but other angels on the show sure were frisky lol.

Hey! So I wrote a post about it here and I have answered a couple of questions about it all in my tag “sacred oath breaking”. But the basics are that in 12x10 when Castiel reads out Akobel’s crimes he lists “laying with a human” as breaking their sacred oath. 

So we explored how if that were true, it would affect previous canon. You say the other angels were frisky, but actually you are literally referring to Gabriel and Balthazar only. Gabriel, who hated heaven so much he ran away to join the pagan gods. It isn’t too difficult to imagine that one of the many reasons Gabriel left were the ridiculous rules that the angels put in play when it came to humans. Balthazar actually supports the theory because of this conversation:

CASTIEL: What… is all this? What are you doing?

BALTHAZAR: Whatever I want. This morning I had a ménage à – what’s French for 12?

BALTHAZAR: You’re the one who made it possible. The footsteps I’m following – they’re yours. What you did, stopping the big plan, the prize fight? You did more than rebel. You tore up the whole script and burned the pages for all of us. [ Laughs. ] It’s a new era. No rules, no destiny. Just utter and complete freedom.

CASTIEL: And this is what you do with it?

BALTHAZAR: Hey, screw it, right? I mean, dad’s not coming back. You might as well blow coke and jump on the bed. You proved to me we could do anything, so I’m trying everything. What difference does it make?

This actually heavily implies that there WERE rules against sleeping with humans and after Cas rebelled Balthazar decided that he was gonna follow in Cas’s footsteps. But he had to fake his own death to do it, just like Gabriel. Which also supports the theory that if you do have sex with a human, you better hope the other angels think you are dead because otherwise they will come and kill you.

No other angels have been canonically shown having an interest in sex except for Anna, who explicitly stated that sex with humans was one of the reasons she chose to fall. Which is a huge fucking deal really. 

So sex is something that is forbidden for angels. Castiel hasn’t ever shown an interest in sex really, except when he was human when he probably felt the rules didn’t apply to him anymore. Castiel hasn’t shown interest in casual sex but he has been intrigued at least by the idea of sex with Meg, and took an interest in the Pizza man pornography. 

Its just my headcanon, but the way I see it, after the horrific thing that happened to him as a human, I reckon he associates casual sex with anyone he doesn’t trust as dangerous and distances himself from it. His complete lack of response to Dean’s teasing about the waitress in 12x12 is certainly evidence of his lack of interest in casual sex. Though I don’t think he would be opposed to the idea were it with someone he loved. The issue of course is the sacred oath, which even after all this time, is something that Castiel at least appears to want to uphold. Though I really don’t know why since all the other angels already think he’s boning Dean and want to punish him for it. 

The Stranger in the Bed - 1st Interlude
  • Fandom: Frozen
  • Pairing: Kristanna
  • Prompt: Kristoff Weekend, Ice (…ish)
  • Words: 2006
  • Rating: M
  • To: @upthenorthmountain and @ominouscloudsofarendelle who responded to ‘I have a weird fic idea’ with ‘tell me about it’ and then ‘you should write the thing’ <3
  • Warnings: Angst, post-partum depression, sex repulsion, explicit sexual content

Soft, yielding heat—enthusiastic hands pulling him closer—a laughing whisper in his ear that merged into other sounds of pleasure, warm breath sighing against his neck, and he was so close to feeling complete, so close—

“Anna—”

Kristoff woke in a snarl of blankets, mind foggy and body aching, and reached out for his wife. A distant cry made his hand stop short. Anna lay with her back to him, the quilt pulled up to the high neck of her nightgown. Her shoulders were stiff, and he knew she was awake, but she didn’t stir. There was no real need, after all. There were innumerable nursemaids to see to the baby. He pulled his hand back silently and scrubbed the heel of it over his face.

There was the grit of sleep in the corners of his eyes, sandy roughness along his jaw, but it was his stomach that felt as though it was full of stone, full of a cold, dull ache. And then there was another part of him that ached, but it was a persistent throbbing that refused to forget the heat of his vivid dreams. He sighed harshly and flung the covers back.

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Yall mind if I rant: The Sequel Nobody Wanted

The newest comic got me to question my stance on Korra/sami yet again (the dashes here exist to keep it out of the tags, just in case that’s still a problem). The short version of this is that my stance really hasn’t changed. (Also, just a headsup, I haven’t read my old anti k/s post in a long time, but it’s probably full of logical fallacies and the lot, so…what I’m getting at here is please don’t judge me based on what I’ve written in the past). 

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anonymous asked:

Do you think Cas will get a happy ending? I used to be Cas' ending would be a choosing to be human thing but now I don't know. Not just the whole Billie thing but also Cas was involved in killing a child. There a certain things you just dont came back from and certain things show's won't have their main heroes do even in a fantasy setting -the protag can kill but he wont cheat, rape, or harm a child usually for example. :(

I didn’t feel like the episode was trying to tell us, Cas killed a kid and now he’s terrible, but instead, Cas feels responsible for the death of the kid, and he feels terrible, which really changes this from my perspective.

Dean killed a kid and it’s not routinely dragged out by the show to prove he shouldn’t be happy. I’m sure it’s tormenting him but narratively, that all disappeared when he got the Mark off into a sort of blob of generic terrible things he did under the Mark guilt, which wasn’t really that well explored either. At this point I’m sure they’re all writing it off as under mind control as a technicality, and not focusing on it like that.*

Sam drank the blood of a screaming nurse, killing her (a valued member of society with kind of a moral event horizon similar to killing children when it comes to listing innocents) - off screen, but it was Sam’s over-the-edge act that demonised HIS soul for all of 10 minutes at the end of season 4, and he only needed a season to repent for it all and stop Lucifer, and again, Cindy is pretty much never mentioned again. 


*Note: not interested in starting the debate about how culpable Dean is for the stuff under the Mark (or I guess Sam under demon blood and Ruby’s manipulations); just commenting on the way the show presented it. It’s probably under the same bracket as Sam trying to murder Bobby in 6x11. Everyone can feel guilty and horrible but for the sake of core characterisation it wasn’t their fault enough to drag them under with it, and in 3 episodes time they seem mostly back to normal :P


Anyway. Both of these actions were objectively worse and more terrible and actively detrimental to Sam and Dean’s moral fibre and our perceptions of them than anything they showed with Cas. I’m not just defending Cas because, idk, I like him more than Sam and Dean; I don’t hate either of them for these things (and if I like Cas more it’s unrelated :P) 

This episode was very careful to establish a villain who would evilly want to kill a child because he’s just plain awful (Ishim) and to contrast Cas to him repeatedly as a dark mirror to Cas’s character, AND use his actions of lying to them to make them enact orders that were emphatically described as part of the angel’s moral code, to trick the rest of the angels into being complicit in this murder. 

Even when Cas thought it was a nephilim and not a human child, this was his immediate reaction to the nephilim being killed - a being that he thought was an abomination and that should be destroyed by all the laws he upheld:

He flinches at the sound of a young girl screaming, despite all of that, there’s a part of him even then that’s not entirely okay with it - that same part of him that’s always been terrible at following orders and of feeling sympathetic or protective of the innocent and defenceless, which is his core goodness that makes him such a great character. 

This scene also directly implies that Cas murdered who knows how many babies:

NAOMI
Not always, angel. There was that day, back in Egypt, not so long ago, where we slew every first-born infant whose door wasn’t splashed with lamb’s blood. And that was just PR.

CASTIEL
Well, I wasn’t there.

NAOMI
Oh, you were there. You just don’t remember it.

And the implication was that he resisted and rebelled there, and maybe even was controlled to do it just like Naomi forcing Cas to attack Dean in the crypt, as by that point it was established she could control his actions completely and use him to kill whoever she wanted (except Dean that one time - but the “first borns” thing is interesting to me anyway for the comparison). 

All of this is meant to horrify us but I don’t think it’s meant to show Cas has broken morality - instead it highlights that he has GOOD morality because of how he reacts to these evil actions and situations, and the fact both times it’s less that he’s made evil choices but that he never had a choice. He may not have had “true” free will until 4x22 when he finally chooses to rebel against heaven and no longer heed their orders, and to decide for himself what is right or not. Obviously killing Lily’s kid came way before that, so we have to weigh how Cas’s character evolved over season 4, the way it was shown Heaven manipulated out dissent and rebellion (Anna tells us rebellious angels will be killed) and gives us the sort of emotional backstory on what Cas would have been up against 100 years ago, following orders and believing completely in Heaven because what other choice did he have? The fact his orders in this case were a lie isn’t even a part of this line of thought - if it HAD been a nephilim, this is how Cas reacted and felt, and what he was up against convincing him he had to do it while he was basically in a state where he was unable to pretty much THINK dissent or more than vague uncertain doubts he didn’t give voice to until 4x07 (100 years later :P). Throw in their absolute and unquestionable law that nephilim are evil and must be killed, and of course the Cas we saw there is following these orders and could have seemed even pleased or satisfied that the child was killed, but EVEN SO, he flinched.

BUT looking at the wider picture, even that they were lied to on top of that somewhat diminished responsibility, I’d agree blood is still on their hands because they helped, but their actual intent to murder is completely diminished by Ishim’s actions because they didn’t know it was an innocent human child and obviously would not have gone along with it if they knew. As the only angel who survived to find out what Ishim had really done, Cas isn’t just in a place to question his orders and assumptions about it being fine to murder Nephilim on principle, but to feel betrayed, manipulated and coerced into the murder of Lily’s kid - obviously this is on a personal level away from how Cas actually talks to Lily about what happened. All he can do THERE is express how sorry he is and to admit her right to be avenged if she wants to, because of course whatever he FEELS about it, his past actions still helped lead to her child’s murder. 

This episode definitely gave a lot of room to ethically exonerate Cas of everything except what will be his conflict with the current nephilim plot - the duty/obligation/moral code from Heaven which dictates that they must be destroyed. And even that, he has to admit he’s now gained enough insight that even seeing it as a separate thing from what happened with Lily’s kid (since she wasn’t a nephilim, the ethical lesson about murder being bad technically doesn’t apply to actual nephilim) he WOULD feel some hesitation now, so the episode has even begun to shake his faith in that, even setting aside that tiny hint that our Cas has always been in there somewhere even when following these orders seemingly blindly. He was the angel who doubted.

I mean, there’s still a long and dodgy road to go about wtf the show will do with Lucifer’s baby, but this is a good sign that they’re edging away from killing it on principle, and it’s Cas’s principle that’s dictating that. So he hasn’t actually reached the same crossroads as Sam and Dean did when they murdered innocents, and he’s already had a strong lesson in questioning his assumptions, and what to do about nephilim. I think unless he decides to do it anyway, at this point your fears about him being unredeemable aren’t a problem yet at all.

At the moment I don’t feel Cas is in any moral danger in this way compared to Sam and Dean’s various bad moral slides, because he started in the uncompromising place, in 12x08 and flashback!Cas whose lines were pretty much all enforcing the idea from Heaven that nephilim are bad and need to be killed and so on, and now by the end of 12x10 this has been at least chipped at a little so far. I have some hope now that Cas will make the right choice, by whatever standards the show works on (this whole thing is really ethically messed up when it comes to the Lucifer baby stuff so idk how much that will relate to what fans think the right choice will be and people with different opinions in general will react differently to what they do, I guess.) But at least by the show’s apparent rules for the characters and whether they’re being presented as good, bad, redeemable, in danger of moral lapse, they’re apparently trying to show us Cas changing and learning and hoping to find another way to deal with it than the old, absolute rule of Heaven he was trying to enforce. Which is all a positive sign that he WON’T go down a bad road and kill the kid and end up in this place where it affects him in the long run…

I hope :P 

I don’t know if Cas will get a happy ending or not because they’re really messing around filling time on a show they know at the moment they can write as if it will never end, but Cas has clear goals set out for happiness and belonging and a sense of home, as well as obstacles to stop him getting there, settling in, and then being in a place where he’s achieved all his goals before the end, and then obviously has to have terrible stuff happen to him to take it away again because that’s not how things work in stories >.> So these delays on Cas getting what he wants are good because obviously they want to hold something back for him to aim at.

But I definitely don’t think Cas has been damaged beyond the point of ethical redemption or deservedness of a happy ending.


I DID in my watching notes, when Ishim was talking about tearing out Lily’s heart because she broke his, and went for her daughter, immediately link it to when by Cas’s POV on being heartbroken by his family turning on him and refusing to help/believe in him/trust him in 6x20, he then goes off and breaks Sam’s wall to slow up Dean from stopping him. Obviously that’s a really exaggerated bad example I just made with a lot of character slander to compare what Cas was doing to what Ishim did. BUT it was his one big, truly “unforgivable” action in the narrative. 

Dean acts as the shows moral compass, and often/mostly has the final say on ethical issues like this, determining who is good and bad (and if he’s wrong, it’s on his shoulders to deal with that - 7x03 was the last episode I watched this week working through the show with my mum, and of course the next episode after that is the judgement one where Dean’s heart is weighed, and blah blah off track here but Dean’s moral judgement is really important on the show). DEAN FORGIVES CAS for hurting Sam. It’s an almost miraculous recovery because to Dean hurting Sam is just… the absolute worst thing you can do. Dean is otherwise the sort of person who would advocate shooting their own grandfather for betrayal, but after Cas does it and inflicts the worst damage on Sam we’ve seen anyone go through in the whole show… He lets Cas back in and accepts his attempts to redeem himself. Cas’s season 7 redemption is one of the most important stories on the show for him or Dean or even Sam when it comes to personal relationships… I like to just randomly watch Cas’s season 7 episodes and bawl at the screen :P 

Anyway, Cas went right over the moral event horizon in 6x22, but he was brought back already, years ago, and like Sam jumping into the cage to atone for season 4, has been morally recovered, in a way, for a very long time. He still feels some guilt for it but the narrative (which blurs with Dean’s opinion :P) has forgiven him. Sam and Dean are initially horrified by Cas’s story in the middle of the episode, but don’t reject him and the final conversation is positive, with them discussing that change and hoping for a change with their next decisions.


(still not sure what’s up with Dean and the Mark and all that, but as I said… rug sweeping :P But yeah, Dean is the character always talking about how they go down swinging and doesn’t see a happy end, and I do think he doesn’t think he deserves one, just that exploring any of the reasons why has all been suppressed by him, so it’s not being dealt with >.> He’s probably got a list of reasons dating back to when he was four years old. Whether HE gets the happy ending is something they’ve been poking at for years, and when that starts getting properly addressed, we’ll know the show is nearly over :P)

thatgirlyeaa  asked:

Hi! I was wondering if you had any tips on where to start with witchcraft? My friend and I want to start a book of shadows but we don't know what else.. xx-anna

Hi Anna!

My first tip is to browse the tumblr tags (#witchcraft #grimoire #book of shadows #witchblr #tumblr witch, etc). It’s a great way to get inspired by what other people are doing for their practice.

Other great resources are Youtubers who are into witchcraft and spirituality. My favorite Youtuber on this subject is TheLuneInnate. She does distance reiki healing videos, and she talks a lot about crystals and astrology and stuff in a really beginner-friendly way. I’m sure there are more out there but she is my fave because I just love her personality. :)

I also recommend getting a book on some witchy subject you’re interested in. If you love crystals, start with a crystal book; if you’re intrigued by astrology, go for that; if you’re fascinated by Wicca and more structured Pagan religions, check out some books about those practices. I’ve heard Wiccapedia is a lovely book that a lot of tumblr witches own, but I haven’t had the chance to read it myself yet. 

If you come across anything on tumblr or youtube or in a book or on a website, and you think “I want to try that!” then that’s a good place to start. Witchcraft (at least the way I see it) can be whatever you want it to be. It can be simply loving crystals and keeping them everywhere. It can be having a favorite plant that you talk to. It can be feeling a connection to your cat that might be your familiar. It can be simply loving to read about witchcraft. Everyone’s practice is totally different, so it’s great to browse and read up on anything that catches your eye, and go from there!

Best of luck to you and your friend <3 

(AU where Regina is still Snow’s stepmother and their relationship has always been terrible and then Leopold dies when Emma’s 3 and leaves her his fortune, everything to go to her when she comes of age, and Regina is livid and that’s when it gets really bad, first just snide remarks and so Snow and David stop going to visit (it’d only ever been out of some sense of obligation, she’s still family after all) but then it’s revealed that, should anything happen to Emma, the money would pass to Regina, and that’s when the random hang ups start, that’s when Snow and David move the first time, and there’s never anything to lead back to Regina, nothing but strange things like phone calls at 2 in the morning and getting home and swearing there hadn’t been a pen on the counter there, that they hadn’t left the windows open, little things that don’t amount to anything but Snow knows her stepmother and so they go, never staying one place long - 

And as Emma gets older it gets worse - strange men trying to get Emma from school but she never goes and the teachers have been warned about things like this - the house getting broken into - strange cars driving by or staying parked outside - 

And so the moves continue. 

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I don't do the whole love and... love: A look into Dean and Cas' sexualities and how they define love

When i think about Dean and Cas and why these two haven’t yet gotten together, it seems to me that they both have such complicated psyches and pasts that they probably don’t even recognize the feeling of being in love. And even if they do, their self-esteem issues certainly wouldn’t allow them to believe another person was in love with them. 

This long meta takes a look at their various relationships in an attempt to understand both their sexual and romantic preferences and why those may be warring against each other. 

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don’t let me be gone

AN: I was listening to the song Goner by Twenty One Pilots and then this fic came out of me. So I guess you can say it’s inspired by that song. (listen to it, it’s a great song) (listen to twenty one pilots in general because they’re perfection)

Summary: Broken boy meets perfect boy. 

Warning: Mention of abuse and homophobia. Language. 

Word count: 2857

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Dan x Reader - Request: I Don't Want To Lose You

REQUEST / PROMPT :
Hey can you do an imagine thing where Dan and y/n are fighting one night (idk about cleaning or something) and she leaves but forgets her phone and its middle of winter in london and she gets lost and dan gets worried cause he cant reach her and he goes out and finds her sitting on a bench shivering
(requester wanted name to be private)

Dan x Reader
I Don’t Want To Lose You

Y/N’s POV
The past few days have been weird, Dan’s been acting really far away mentally and is really quiet. Not only that, he’s acting like he doesn’t to be around me anymore. We’ve been friends for around one year and just started dating 5 months ago, but as of now there was no explanation to why he was like this. We’ve never had any big fight or argument, but now I’m afraid this will be it. Dan hadn’t even been mean or aggressive, not even passive, but his guarded nature was seriously confusing me. While his current behavior may have been a little rude, I know it wasn’t intentional. But seriously what was bringing it on? We haven’t had any disagreements, nothing had happened, and I don’t think I’ve done anything. So what was it?
I was sitting on the couch and Dan was on the Mac Desktop sitting at the table. He was quiet but it didn’t seem like anything was wrong, so I decided to ask if he wanted to go to dinner with some friends, as we got an invite earlier today.

“Dan?” I asked and he took off his headphones to turn to me.
“Uh yeah?” Dan spoke neutrally, although he sounded a bit down.
“Do you want to go to dinner with Jack, Anna and you know, our other friends some time?” I spoke, trying to sound peppy at the end.
But Dan wasn’t haven’t it and instead just shrugged.
“I don’t know.” He mumbled.
“Alright well do you wanna do anything this week?” I said but Dan just remained silent and went straight back to the desktop screen.
“Dan are you mad at me?” I asked calmly.
“What? No why would you think that?” Dan said quietly, but his demeanor was suddenly getting defensive.
“I don’t maybe because you’ve been ignoring for the past week.” I spat out but apparently Dan had wanted to retort. He shouldn’t be the one getting defensive.
“I’ve just been busy alright?” Dan said groaning. Okay this was it, now I really need to know why he’s being such a prick.
“Okay fine, but that doesn’t make up for how you’ve barely spoken to me– and acted so distant—-do you even want me here?” I said with my voice slightly shouting.
“Oi, okay of course I want you here. But I have a lot of work to do, and stop assuming things. It’s like your putting words in my mouth.” Dan sassily said back.
“Well, there’s no words to put in your mouth… Since you barely speak to me.”
I said bitterly.
“Whatever.” Dan said as if he was annoyed. Like he should be the annoyed one.
“Dan honestly why are you acting like this?” My voice was breaking now but Dan didn’t even notice, probably didn’t even noticed my runny eyes. No response.
“You know what, I’m going to get some fresh air.” I said running out instantly grabbing my coat and bag and rushing outside.

I didn’t even stop to check before I reached the shops just around the flat and sat down on a bench. My eyes wearing already tearing up, my mouth quivering and mind questioning everything. I turned to my bag to open and grab my phone to ring a friend, but my phone was nowhere in my bag. Shoot. I freaking left my phone in the flat. It’s 10PM in London, winter is nearly in full swing and here I am looking like a mess, with my mascara running and no phone. It’s too early to go back and Dan should think about what he’s done, so I guess I’ll sit out here like a mess for a little while longer.

Dan’s POV
After procrastinating the inevitable fact that y/n was nowhere to be heard from, and now hasn’t come back for at least 20 minutes. I’m freaking worried. When she left I didn’t even bother to look at her, I was too busy being a twat. But I could’ve sworn her voice broke slightly before she ran out. Why did I do this? It’s winter and now y/n is all alone in the middle of Islington, thanks to me pushing her away. I texted her earlier to know avail, and it’s 15 minutes now. Okay Dan, it’s fine maybe she’s just not answering text. Call her. I do and pace around the flat worriedly, wait what’s that noise? It’s a vibration ringtone, except it’s buzzing from y/n’s phone. I look the table in the hallway, y/n forgot her phone. My girlfriend’s gone and left her phone, how am I meant to reach her? Is she alright? What have I’ve done? I instantly put on some jeans, grab my winter coat and head out into the brisk cold winter wind of London. I have two thoughts in my mind pushing pass all the other unimportant and annoying ones. Where the hell is my girlfriend and is she okay? Bloody hell, I hope she’s alright. I rush down the back of our street calling out her name.

“y/n!” I shout multiple times waking up and down the street. “y/n! Where are you?” I say, but my only response is a dog bark. Okay maybe she headed to Starbucks, no they’re closed now. Wait a minute, everything’s closed now. y/n is alone and everything is closed. Where would she go, where could she go? I walk to the front of our street turning left to where all the shops, restaurants and pubs are. I see a couple of men, a group of friends, a couple, and a waitress getting off from her shift. But no y/n. I walk around more worriedly calling out her name, and then see a tree with a bench with someone sitting on it. y/n. Oh my god it’s y/n, she’s okay. I instantly run over to her and accidentally startle her.

"Dan! What the he–“ y/n shouts as she turns around to see my tall figure. Great job Dan. She’s scared at first, but once she realized it was me she just looks tired and annoyed. I don’t blame her really.
“Sorry.” I said empathically looking at her under the streetlight. Her hair is messy, and her eyes are red, it looks like she’s just been crying. I made her cry. I hurt her.
“What are you doing here?” y/n’s voice shakes brokenly, while her frail body scoots around shivering. She must be freezing.
“y/n…” I say sadly, ashamed in myself.
“What do you want Dan?” She says distantly. Even in the combo of bad moon and street lighting, y/n manages to look beautiful.
“I’m sorry. I know I’ve been acting so weird these past couple of days. This whole week basically. It’s just– I’ve been so paranoid.” I say while y/n looks up at me still shaking from cold, Dan give her your bloody jacket.
“Here, you’re freezing. Wear mine.” y/n motions a decline, but accepts it once I drape it over her cold body. I sit myself down beside her on the chilly bench. A few moments of silence passes by before y/n speaks up.

“Paranoid about what?” Her voice asks quietly.
“Well many things really. Life. Oh yes, another existential episode with Dan.” I say trying to lighten the mood, but y/n just sighs bittersweetly. Way to go Dan, just go on and continue to explain yourself.
“Once I was thinking about that, I was thinking about you and how it’d affect you and our relationship. I began to get so worried and caught up in my mess of a brain. So, I thought I’d distant myself so you wouldn’t get hurt.” I say sighing and now sitting considerably closer to her.
All y/n could mutter was a why and I was quick to answer hopeful to make up for my empty replies this whole week.
“I was scared that you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore. I don’t even know why you like me in the first place, you can surely do better I’m such a mess.” I confessed to y/n truthfully, while her face remained grim and she gulped.
“Why would you think that?” y/n put her cold hands to the sides of my face, staring at me intently.
“Self crippling doubt.” I muttered looking down, it was true.
“Dan…” y/n said sadly, probably pitying me.
“I know I’ve been treating you awful lately, pushing you away, being distant, it’s just I’m not good enough for you. I’m so sorry y/n.” I told her sincerely.
“Dan, I love you for you. Don’t think you’re not good enough, because that’s not true.”
y/n said sweet as she was.
“Yes it is, you’re wonderful and amazing. You put up with me.” I said slightly chuckling.
“It’s alright, you just need to tell me these things. Bottling them up doesn’t do any good, but at least you’re not rude about it. Just distant.” y/n flashed a small giggle back laughing at my dumbness, at least she can laugh about it. “You dork.” She muttered. I just nodded nervously scratching my head trying to fix my fringe.
“But seriously stop it.” y/n said pointing her index finger act me serious and strict.
“I know I’m so stupid. I truly am sorry y/n.” I apologized, she needed to understand how truly bad I felt.
“It’s okay Dan, I forgive you.” y/n whispered back in my ear.
I instantly pulled her in a tight hug, and ran my fingers on her smooth skin and through her pretty hair. She was so soft and she felt so nice. I missed her so much.
“I don’t ever want to loose you. I can’t loose you like I just did.” I said choking on my words before y/n cut me off with a kiss.
“Don’t worry you won’t.” My lips touched hers once again. Finally.

Nohrian Festival: Leo’s Special Illustration + Convo

As requested!

Soooo… Did you know that Leo is fond of tomatoes? He’s fond of tomatoes. Like, REALLY fond of them.

They don’t state exactly what his costume is supposed to be. It looks like a slightly simpler and different color version of the “vampire” costume that Anna provides for Subaki, so Leo’s too is probably supposed to be a vampire costume. Although, to me it looks more like a typical young early/mid 19th century young man’s formal suit. …Which is precisely what Dracula and other movie vampires wear, isn’t it. Heh. 

(I’ve seen other sites say that Subaki’s suit is a prince costume, but Anna refers to it as belonging to “a sucker of blood,” and that sounds like a vampire to me. Of course, it could be a vampire prince, or a really bloodthirsty prince… Wait, why am I talking so much about Subaki here?! This is about Leo! And tomatoes!)

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anonymous asked:

I saw that you've met gerard before. Is he a nice person? I don't want to pry or anything I'm just curious if he's as sweet as he seems.

HE IS! he’s the nicest, most generous person ive ever met. hes so kind and appreciative and genuine. actually i have a long-ass post (an ask i answered before when someone asked me what he’s like in person) so i hope you dont mind that i copy and paste what i wrote

oh my, okay this could probably be a 10k word essay but lets not im trying to keep it under 5k lol but he’s always been super sweet when i met him. and obviously this is based on my own experience but since i had the pleasure to photograph 3 of his signings, i also saw how hes with other people. and what i always appreciate the most about him is that hes really attentive and he always seems interested in what you say. when theres time, he will always make an effort to have a proper conversation with you, its not like hes just making smalltalk for the sake of it. i noticed that he is really perceptive. and im aware that can intimidate people. it used to intimidate me. but i got over it and i felt like the second i got over it and legit stopped thinking so much about what i say to him and just talked to him, it was so much better and i could tell that he noticed how i let my guard down and that he appreciated that? i cant really describe it. like, the last time i saw him, i was having really bad anxiety (not bc of him) and i stayed away from him on purpose bc i could tell he was feeling a bit anxious too. but somehow we ended up outside and i said hi, we hugged, had a conversation. and i mentioned feeling so anxious and that i was basically able to breathe for the first time that evening and he was like ‘yeah me too i totally get it’ and i felt like he made such an effort to distract me from my anxiety. but at the same time he was distracting himself from his anxiety too? like he kept asking me all these questions and whenever i mentioned something i was clearly excited about he was like super smiley. and honestly, i felt SO calm. and from the times ive met him hes always made me feel super calm and like i could talk to him about everything and anything. idk if thats just me bc im sure he makes other people feel nervous lmao but yeah i think at least some ppl will agree. he just always makes you feel like he enjoys the conversation as much as you do. hes super interesting, hes fun to be around, his laugh is the most infectious lol hes always polite, hes even nice to people who have been shitty to him. if Lindsey is around he will always look for her in the crowd, if shes close he will always have his arm around her or hold her hand. but at the same time he will not ignore you just because shes around (same with Lindsey btw) he goes out of his way to do things for other people but he doesnt go around being like ‘oh my look at me, look at what a good person i am’ actually if he does something nice for you he will make it look like it just ‘happened’ and then after months you will find out that Gerard Way made sure it happened. . so id say hes very humble and down to earth. like at one signing i photographed the staff advised me not to take ‘posed’ photos of Gerard with fans bc it would take longer. but then one fan asked me to take one. and i asked Gerard if it was okay and he was like ‘of course!!’ and gave me this reassuring wink. so obviously then everyone else wanted posted photos too and i felt like i shouldnt be doing it and i was worried that it would bother him but he kept telling me ‘its okay, dont worry, we’re just gonna do this’ *reassuring wink* and then after a while whenever i was off somewhere photographing someone else, i would hear Gerard be like ‘Anna? can you take a photo please? :D :D :D’ and at the end of the day when i had to leave everyone was like ‘nooo who’s gonna take photos now’ even tho the staff said it wasnt allowed but bc Gerard did it anyway, they were like ‘okay cool’. like….i could give you dozens of examples of times when he was just the best dude ever. but that would take so long and im not sure ppl want to hear me ramble on and on. anyway…basically he doesnt see himself as ‘a big deal’ like so many artists/musicians. he always remembers a fan he met before, sometimes he even remembers people from twitter and honestly its the best thing ever to see him recognize a fan and see the fan get excited about it. also, people dont even know how much he sacrificed for other people, especially while MCR was still a thing. like, he always put other people’s needs first and not his own. and i think ultimately he shouldnt have done that bc it made him unhappy but he did it anyway and i think thats really noble. hes just so normal. when i see him i honestly forget thats THE Gerard Way. i mean i know thats probably due to my experiences with him and not everyone feels like that but yknow…just from my perspective.

and yeah i know it sounds like im up his ass or whatever i dont care. people can tell me im full of shit all they want. all i can say is, if he wasnt a genuinely nice person i wouldnt be his fan, and i sure wouldnt bother telling you about how lovely he is. bc i have met several of my idols in the past and somehow i was always disappointed but with Gerard it was like ‘yes hes genuinely a nice person and hes not fake at all, hes not arrogant at all, i feel appreciated as a fan and a person’ from the very first time i met him. so i hope if you havent met him yet you will meet him soon bc its honestly such a special experience to be around a person like that <3

im also gonna add that since i wrote this post, i saw him again (in November at NC Comicon) and again, he was SO lovely. the second he saw me enter the room he waved at me with a big smile on his face, then he took some extra time to talk to me. i gave him and Tommy Lee Edwards the artbook we made for him (if you dont know what the artbook is you can go to http://gerardwayartbook.tumblr.com and look at it) and yeah he was just so excited and grateful and so was i, obviously. the whole weekend he was so lovely to everybody, and i know he always works with the organizers of the events he does to make sure the fans can have the best possible experience. he really makes an effort. and every artist, musician, music industry professional, comic book professional, comic book retailers, other photographers, his close friends etc etc i meet just says such positive things about him too and always mention what a kind, humble person he is. and that makes me even more happy 

SORRY FOR THE LONG POST but yknow i love to talk about Gerard lol

Frozen pissed me off and I'm going to explain some of why, and my take on how the film could have been improved +pictures!

Okay so I was sort of off-put by the art design in the advertising since it’s so… blah, but I realized I needed to try to put that aside and come to terms with the fact that Disney doesn’t make really art-designy movies anymore and it’s unfair of me to hate on it for that. So I decided to go check it out, after hearing it was good.

Um.

Good things! The entire first act is excellent. Poignant, effective, and interesting. The songs were decent, though most kind of forgettable and one the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life, but whatever. They did what they needed and I felt they were appropriate. The humor succeeded more often than not. The snowman was unnecessary, but… I didn’t mind him. These are the normal sort of Disney gripes that happen all the time when one has a film like this and wants more out of it. Okay, whatever. You can’t expect anything else from Disney.

Nah, that’s not what I hated so much.

Spoiler-free version: the film talks a lot about true love but never established its characters, plot, or importance, so the whole thing is a lot of uphill wandering to a climax that does nothing because there are no emotions in the movie, no rising and falling action, nothing. This movie is like a sugar cookie, lots of sparkle on top and nothing inside but over-sweetness and lies. 

Spoilers under the cut, and my version:

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That's Why

It’s Valentine’s Day, I wanted to give writing Kristanna a shot, and that’s about it. It’s hastily written, and it’s more of a drabble than anything, but I figured I’d try it out, as sort of a test run for future fics.

Rating: K

Pairings: Kristanna

Summary: Kristoff is Kristoff, and that’s why Anna loves him.

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