but too expensive to keep up :(

How to Become His Dream Girl, Even if You’re Not (A Spoiled GF Guide)

so recently, within the past 2 months I have successfully become a spoiled gf, this (surprisingly) was a whole lot easier than I thought it would be, but using this technique (that I kind if made up) I broke it down into some simple steps :)

STEP ONE: Pick someone you wont mind spending a considerable amount of time with

- Realize that this isn’t a sugar daddy, this man wants to have a full on relationship with you, therefore you will be spending a large amount of time with him so you WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH HIM. So just make sure that he is someone you can handle without wanting to strangle after 45 minutes.


STEP TWO: Charm the fuck out of him, then have him open up to you

- You have to make him want you, be alluring and kind. smile at him, laugh at his jokes, compliment him on shit that you might not even care about. Right now you are selling a prophecy, an introduction to a relationship. Make yourself sound as interesting as possible but leave him always wanting more, always have him talk about himself more than you talk about yourself. try to pick up on little things and get a read on his emotional status and how he chooses to react to certain situations, learn about him so you can mold yourself into his dream woman. Once he sees your “genuine” interest in him, he will start opening up to you and THIS is where you’ll really need to pay attention.


STEP THREE: Find out what intimate part of his life is missing

- THIS IS KEY LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!!! You will have to figure out what relationship related snippet is really missing. In my case my sugar boyfriend (ill call him T) was married for 10+ years and never really got what he wanted out of the marriage and was constantly lied to, but ended up staying on behalf of his 4 step kids. after getting divorced he dated a stripper who just used him for his money even though he supposedly had “genuine” feelings for her. After learning about his tragic love history I came to the conclusion that what he really needed out of a relationship was mutual affection and to feel valued. KEEP IN MIND, THIS STEP CAN TAKE A WHILE AND INCLUDES LOTS OF TRIAL AND ERROR. So after coming up with my hypothesis of the lack of value and affection, I decided to put it to the test and did 2 simple things in order to do so. first, while he was at work, I called him to see how his day was going. You would have thought I was god himself calling because he was so happy to hear from me and to hear that I was thinking about him and that I took the time out to call him and let him know that. Second, I cooked him dinner. One day while I was staying at his house I decided to surprise him with a very basic meal (frozen salmon fillets and sautéed bell peppers) and yet again, he was so happy and excited at the fact that I had done that for him. This is when I knew I was on the home stretch


STEP FOUR: Focus on the missing intimate piece, and make it your specialty

- This is what has him keep you around, doing the things that he needed but never got. don’t get me wrong, I’m not cooking this man dinner everyday, instead I switch it up and substitute certain actions. He loves affection, so when we’re sitting on the couch together ill lay my head on his lap, or hold his hand and stroke the side of his face. I’ve learned that simple shit like that makes him incredibly happy, which makes him incredibly generous.


STEP FIVE: Get Spoiled

- Now after giving him a taste of life with you in it, you need to give him a taste of how much your life costs. By now he’s showered you in nice dinners and gifts on the whim, but you’re here for the kill, you want a access to the finances and for him to get you whatever you want. For me, this was by far the easiest step out of all of them, I told him I wanted to go shopping and that I needed some stuff from Lush and Sephora (he had no idea what either of those places were) AND HERE IS WHERE YOU GET HIM. Make sure he sees how expensive it is just to be you, talk to him about your favorite products and what you need and use on the daily (hype them up in price too, like if you need foundation and you usually use L'Oréal, rave about the Gorgio Armani foundation instead) make it seem like your mere existence is expensive, by now this man wants to take care of you and wants to keep you in his life and therefore will do what it takes to keep you near and dear. Once he see’s how “hard” it is to be you, he will make it easier



At this point in my relationship with T, I am nearly moved into his house and have full usage of his ex-wife’s Lexus and his credit card, and tomorrow I get to meet his mother. Once you get on the right path of knowing what a man is missing in this life, you’ll be able to use that to your advantage and have him truly believe that you’re the woman of his dreams, even if you’re just a Faux Heaux :)

anonymous asked:

Lance,,,being insecure,,,,and the team helping,,,in subtle ways,,,in my,,,aesthetic,,,

anon,,,you get me,,,,

  • lance has no confidence in himself, thats a fact
  • but he hides it pretty well, all the jokes and bravado keep people off his tail
  • and the trick behind all that is that lance is observant.
    • like scarily so
  • so imagine when missions start to go wrong and lance does something behind everyones back that gets them back on track
  • or when they’re having team meetings, he wil mention something thats really off hand that no one really thinks about till later because omg it makes so much sense. and im talking wayyy later, to the point wehre its not relevant anymore
  • but its doesnt stop there
  • sometimes pidge will be sleeping in an odd place and lance will bring her a blanket so she doesnt get cold
    • he also saves the stuff on her laptop and turns it off or idles it for later
  • hunk will misplace something in the kitchen and lance sometimes walks in and ‘magically’ finds it for him
    • lance just knows where everything is
  • when coran is doing maintenance on the castle, lance likes to appear and give him a helping hand
  • shiro has a hard time sleeping and lance found a soothing body wash for shiro specifically that helps him calm down some, enough to sleep more than he does
    • (you cant tell me that lance doesnt know where all the cosmetic stuff is in the castle, the boy has a nose for it i swear)
  • keith is the training room gremlin and when kes been at it too much, lance will come in and basically screw up keiths groove enough to get him out of there
    • usually takes 3 or 4 challenges before keith has had enough and storms out
    • lance’s feelings arent hurt by it, he just wants keith to take care of himself ok?
  • allura can work herself to the bone too so when shes in the control room, lance likes to come by and start talking about earth
    • the similarities draw allura out of her head and start to open up to lance about altea
    • and by the end of the convo, allura is yawning and lance tells her to go to bed. works like a charm
  • and i like to think it takes a really long time for anyone to realize that lance has been keeping them together this whole time
  • like when conversations get to heated, he will make a joke at his expense and it diffuses the situation
  • or he will say just the right thing to kickstart a really great plan
    • all the while not taking any credit for it
  • like my dudes, lance cares so fucking much and no one notices, but hes completely okay with it since the team is all together and he can see his own family in them
  • he doesnt want to lose that
  • so he sticks to being the Middle Child™ and accepts being looked over as long as team voltron is together

I wonder if it would be wrong of me to try and finance enough money to be able to go back to college. See heres the thing, I originally had a full ride to University of Oregon right, I didn’t have to pay a dime, all I had to do was keep my grades up and attend classes and I’d get to attend any class I wanted to at their expense. 

But here’s the thing, I started to get really sick, both physically and mentally, and there were several really close deaths in my family at the same time, so I just couldn’t attend class because I was too sick, I was too psychotic [literally, I’m schizophrenic they didn’t know at the time so I wasn’t getting treatment], and was grieving the loss of some close family members, so I couldn’t make the attendance record, so my scholarship was taken away, but that isn’t the problem.

The problem is I owe University of Oregon itself $12,891.65 for not showing up to classes.

And the problem with this is, until I pay this off I can never go back to any college ever again, because FAFSA will not give you a loan unless you send all of your transcripts to the university you want to attend, and University of Oregon has frozen my transcripts.

I attempted to apply to a nearby university here, they accepted me, but said they couldn’t register me for classes or get me funding via federal aid until I sent my University of Oregon transcripts, they said this was the case with any university I would ever attempt to apply to. 

I worked so hard to be so near graduation, and all those courses that had already been paid for are frozen because of one term where I got too sick to function. 

It’s my dream to study physics and mathematics at school, I’m really interested in these fields, and I’m devastated that I’ll never be able to go to university ever again, because of this. I just wanted to go to school and learn about things I’m interested in, and now I never can again.

… would it be appropriate to try and raise money over the course of years via this blog to try and go back to university one day in the future, or is that selfish of me? I honestly don’t know, there’s just so many other people who need money to survive, and I just want money to go back to school, so I don’t know.

Like I don’t care how long it takes to raise it … I just ….. want to go back to school eventually, and every month they add 87 dollars to the total.

I’m disabled and on SSI so I can’t ever pay this back by myself, it is literally impossible. Is it selfish of me to make a youcaring for this and advertise it on this blog? Again I don’t care how long it takes I just want to go back to school sometime in my life?

Hey guys, Emerson here. I know I don’t post much anymore, but this is something that means a lot to me.

Anyways, my budgie Pond is sick. We don’t know with what, we’re still waiting on the test results. We suspect that it’s chlamydia. I wanted to keep her at the vet for today and into tomorrow, but we had to go against vet’s orders and take her home because of the vet bills for keeping her there (totalling to $1100 between yesterday and today, but we cut it down to $700). We had to take her out of the oxygen tank, and her breathing is shallow and rapid. She’s not doing well out of the tank. My dad argued that she’s a $20 bird and that the expenses were far too much for a parakeet. I know you guys would understand the frustration this kind of statement brings about. I mean, if it was our dog who’s sick, he would do anything for him. I even offered up my whole savings to keep her there, but he wouldn’t allow it. So I’m stuck begging on the internet for help. The goal is to raise enough to cover current costs so we can break even and put her back in a hospital setting, specifically under intensive treatment and in an oxygenated tank.

If you donate, you can message me afterwards and I’ll try and make you some art. I’m decent at pet portraits and drawings. I really appreciate anything that comes our way, anything helps. Thank you for your time.

The link is here: gofundme.com/ponds-medical-expenses

Team USA if NHLers can’t play in the Olympics: a proposal

(totally inspired by @nataliespooner ‘s hilariously awesome Canada roster)

Forwards:

  • the neighbor’s golden retriever who stole 8 hamburgers from your 4th of July barbecue
  • some excellent player from Minnesota whose name everyone promptly forgets
  • Carrie Underwood
  • that guy in your english lit class who read Kerouac’s On The Road and is literally physically incapable of shutting up about the death of American masculinity and who watches the blackhawks just often enough to be insufferable about his knowledge
  • Amanda Kessel sporting a fake beard
  • Jason Momoa, shirtless but protected by the power of his own beauty
  • the smell of a Taco Bell at 4am
  • the blandest white man on this season of The Bachelorette (the competition will be stiff)
  • a customer service person who clearly doesn’t want to be smiling at you but is doing so anyhow
  • a dump truck full of sand sprinkled over the entire roster for “grit”
  • someone dressed head-to-toe (snapback-to-slide-sandals) in underarmour athletic wear
  • twitter user soloucity aka Tony X.
  • every child in this year’s Kraft Hockeyville USA
  • the vengeful but impotent spirit of USA Hockey


Defense:

  • Snoop Dogg, mic’d up and swearing
  • an alligator in a Florida Panthers jersey
  • the slightly too good-looking American dude who’s gonna play Brent Burns in the Hollywood movie about John Scott
  • an unexpectedly mild-mannered Texas longhorn steer
  • a gallon of sweet tea laced with arsenic
  • someone totally bewildered by the idea that Canada has its own Thanksgiving
  • a battered VHS tape of 2004′s Miracle 
  • the entire Las Vegas Golden Knights roster as of April 4, 2017


Goalies:

  • the personification of Ben Bishop’s sadness about being traded
  • 15 starbucks frappuccinos arranged in a pyramid
  • a very expensive wall that actually does a really terrible job keeping stuff out


The puck will be a Chicago deep-dish pizza.

anonymous asked:

I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?

HI darling,

I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:

Home

Money

Health

Emergency

Job

Travel

Better You

Apartments/Houses/Moving

Education

Finances

Job Hunting

Life Skills

Miscellaneous

Relationships

Travel & Vehicles


Other Blog Features

Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later

Adult Cheat Sheet:

Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:

Reasons to move out of home

You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:

  • wishing to live independently
  • location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university
  • conflict with your parents
  • being asked to leave by your parents.

Issues to consider when moving out of home

It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:

  • Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
  • Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
  • Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.

Your parents may be worried

Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:

  • They may worry that you are not ready.
  • They may be sad because they will miss you.
  • They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
  • They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.

Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.

Tips for a successful move

Tips include:

  • Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
  • Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.
  • Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
  • Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
  • Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.

If your family home does not provide support

Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.

If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.

If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.

Where to get help

  • Your doctor
  • Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
  • Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
  • Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
  • Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277
  • Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50
  • Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577

Things to remember

  • Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.
  • Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations. 

(source)

Keep me updated? xx

imagine being hoseok’s maid.

Originally posted by hobilu

  • good luck cleaning up all that sunshine dust.
  • hoseok is Old Money and has never worked a day in his life.
  • instead he’s very invested in charities and in the arts and never gets tired of attending balls and events of all sorts.
  • he also hosts a score of his own, so he has a large staff to help him around the house.
  • did i say house? i meant mANSIONS. plural.
  • the most social of all the socialites.
  • it’s no secret that jung hoseok lights up a room and his social affairs are always free of drama and scandal because he’s everyone’s unproblematic fave.
  • such a lovely employer too, he treats everyone fairly and often stops to have a short chat with his domestic helpers, i.e you.
  • everyone always wishing him a good morning/afternoon/evening/night when they pass him, because he’s very polite and often does the same.
  • and he remembers everyone’s birthdays and gives them all a decent bonus for the holidays he’s such a saint.
  • but he also makes The Absolute Worst puns all the fucking time and you’re all obligated to laugh with him rip
  • “you didn’t sweep that room with just a glance, did you?”
  • “haha no, sir.”
  • “another one fights the dust, i see.”
  • “haha yes, sir.”
  • “don’t make mária do the hoovering, she’s slovak.”
  • “haha okay, sir”
  • and if these genuinely crack you up then congratulations you’re already his favourite.
  • if not then you’re kinda really very cute anyway so he doesn’t mind.
  • and maybe one day he has an event to attend and you arrive late with his newly pressed tuxedo and he’s like ????? where were you
  • “sorry i’m late, sir. i over-swept.”
  • and hoseok fucking loses his shit.
  • good job you cleaned the floor earlier that day because he is fucking rolling on it.
  • now you’re definitely his favourite.
  • then he gives you a very straight face and asks “can you tie a bowtie?”
  • and you’re like “no ??????” because of course not how even
  • and he’s like “great! i’ll teach you!”
  • because he can do it just fine, he knows the technique, but he always messes it up on himself and it ends up looking sad and floppy.
  • so you spend about twenty minutes tying hoseok’s bowtie and cracking jokes until you master it, so that you can help him out in the future.
  • and because he really really really likes making you smile.
  • from then on he lets you practice regularly and you get very good at it and he’s like “ah, the student has defeated the master”
  • so you go “thank you, master.”
  • and oH BOY GOES RED AF
  • i mean it shouldn’t be a big deal you call him “sir” all day long but
  • young boys are addressed as “master” by the staff and he gets nostalgic and yet it’s oddly erotic and he’s so flustered help the poor man ????
  • nah you’re probably flustered too.
  • rip the both of you.
  • things are awkward after that.
  • he doesn’t want to make things awkward because he’s your employer and he doesn’t want to like accidentally harass you or anything.
  • but you know how he’s like really invested in the arts ???
  • and he attends every ballet production in the country at least three times.
  • and donates so much money to theatres and operas and dance institutes especially, so they make him a guest of honour at every opening.
  • and he was supposed to attend the season opening at the ballet with someone (there was no one lol) but they cancelled and now he has a plus one but no one to take with him.
  • and he knows you have a birthday coming up (in two months lol) and he’ll pay for the attire if you don’t have anything to wear but he would be honoured of possibly maybe you would want to be his date ???????
  • and of course you acCEPT ARE YOU MAD THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE
  • and rip jung hoseok ??? because  you look amazing in evening wear and will you ever let the poor boy live???? how is he supposed to take his eyes off you long enough to catch the performance omg ????
  • and on the way there in the limo you tie his bowtie and he tells you all about the production you’re seeing and the choreographer which he knows personally and the primary dancer park jimin who he also knows personally and
  • and honestly he’s so passionate and over the moon with joy and it’s a delight to listen to him talk about the thing he loves so much you fall in love with him like ten times on that one limo ride bless.
  • and after the show you’re like wow best date ever ????
  • and you admit to him it’s gonna be weird going back to work for him after all of this because he’s treated you like royalty and tomorrow you’re going back to folding his socks.
  • and he’s like “i mean, not,,,,,,,, necessarily?”
  • “what do you mean?”
  • “you could just,,,,,,, marry me?”
  • and hAHA of coURSE he’s jOKING hahhhha a hah ah
  • but seriously no pressure or anything but he really likes you and would like to keep seeing you,,,,,,, in evening wear.
  • and if you want to keep working for him that’s cool too, but if you don’t then you don’t have to and if you wanna quit and sue him that’s fine he’ll settle out of court and give you a large severance package and he’ll write you the best references and
  • and you just gotta kiss him to shut him up.
  • and then you make out in the back of the limo.
  • imagine hoseok taking you to all the fancy events and showing you off.
  • showering you with gifts and pampering you, it’s A Lot ok.
  • and he’s the loveliest person on earth but he will punch anyone who dares suggest he’s “slumming it” with you no fucking way m8
  • and be warned if you’re attending a ball he’s gonna make you dance all fucking night but it’s okay because he’s a terrific dancer lucky u.
  • and if you want to travel he’ll take you anywhere you wanna go from lavish tropical resorts to the most remote mountain villages.
  • he just loves making you happy :’)
  • anyway, nsfw under the cut.

Keep reading

Slippery When Wet

Reid x Reader

“You had sex in the Museum of Modern Art ? Oh my gawd..” Penelope’s hands were clasped over her mouth and she was almost shaking with laughter.

You all were. What had started off as a nice meal cooked by JJ, had quickly escalated into a full on girls night in. You were all strewn about her living room, wine bottles in various places. You were lying on her couch, your feet placed in Emily’s lap and you were all discussing the various strange places you’d had sex.

You were tipsy, pleasantly on your way to being hammered and you were having a brilliant night in with your female colleagues. Garcia was sat in the arm chair with her legs slung up over the side and JJ was sprawled out on her floor, her head propped up on her arms and a half empty bottle of wine next to her. She’d taken to swigging directly from the bottle as she’d smashed her second wine glass an hour ago and you’d all berated her for wasting alcohol. You knew where your priorities were.

“Yep! I used to date one of the security guards when I was eighteen. He snuck us in after hours,” Emily told you, her face pink with laughter.

“God…” JJ said. “The most adventurous place me and Will do it is in the shower, he loves it in there.”

You giggled, “Spence loves it when we fuck in the shower too, although I’m always scared we’ll slip over.”

The three girls stopped laughing and all turned to look at you incredulously.

“Spence?” Emily asked.

Your eyes widened as you realised what you’d said.

“OUR Spencer?!?” JJ rearranged herself into an upright position, crossing her legs and leaning forward.

Oh fuck.

“Y/N? Really? You and Reid?”

“Errrrm.”

JJ crawled across the floor and pulled out her handbag which was stashed at the side of her couch. Taking out her purse, she handed fifty dollars to Emily.

“Penelope, I believe you owe me fifty too?” Prentiss told Garcia.

“In a minute. I still…. Really?” She was leaning forward in her seat.

“You can’t say anything to the guys. Please. We’re not ready for people to know yet.”

“OH MY GOSH, IT’S TRUE!!” Garcia squealed and you caught JJ rolling her eyes and making the motion of covering her ears.

You took a big gulp of wine and nodded, readying yourself for the questions.

“When?” Penny demanded to know. “No no no wait.. I bet it was at Morgan’s party? Am I right, am I right?”

You shook your head. “We were together by then.”

“THAT WAS THREE MONTHS AGO, Y/N.”

Emily and JJ just looked amused, watching the exchange between you two. You gave them all a sheepish look.

“The time we went on that outward bounds team building thing? I remember you two lagging behind on the trails. Did something happen then. Wait… You two got back to camp a good thirty minutes after the rest of us. It was then wasn’t it… Oh I can see it now; you trip and Spencer reaches for you to stop your fall. You end up in a pile on the floor and stare into each others…. ”

“Pen, no. We were already together then too. Although something definitely happened in those woods.”

JJ interrupted her just before she was about to launch into another convoluted guess. “When exactly did it happen?”

“Erm…. You remember that case where I was really ill and Spencer ended up escorting me home and spent the weekend looking after me.”

“Hahahaha,” Emily laughed. “So you played a little bit of Doctor Reid and patient then.”

“Weeell not exactly. I was too ill. But that’s when we discovered that we both liked each other.”

“Girl, we could have told you that.” JJ sipped from her wine bottle, grinning at you.

“So wow… That was… ” Garcia thought back in her head, “Seven months ago.”

“Yep.”

“What’s he like, you know, as a boyfriend?” JJ asked.

“Perfect.”

All three awwwwed in unison. You weren’t lying either, Spencer really was the best partner you’d had.

“Does anyone at work know?” Garcia wanted to know.

“Only Hotch. And that was because we felt he ought to. He’s fine with it as long as it doesn’t effect our work. Which so far, it hasn’t.”

There was a moments pause before Emily cleared her throat.

“I’m just gonna ask what those two are thinking. What’s he like in the sack?”

“I can’t tell you that!!”

“Yes you can.” They urged, almost as if they were a practiced chorus.

“No, I can’t!”

“You’ve gotta give us something here.” Garcia begged.

“Look, all I’ll say is that he’s definitely picked up a thing or two from all the things he’s read, and that he makes me extremely happy.”

Another trio of awwws.

“I never really imagined Spencer to be a shower sex kinda guy though,” Emily piped up.

“Oh he definitely is. I swear, the amount of times one of us has nearly slipped over.”

…Monday Morning…

The girls had promised not to say anything and you were trying to find the right time to tell Reid that you’d let it slip. You’d decided that when you were ready, you’d tell everyone together.

You were sitting across from each other around the circular table in the meeting room with Hotch, Derek and Rossi, waiting for the other three.

Strolling in with smirks on their faces, they handed Reid a wrapped package.

You looked at them curiously.

“A present? What did I do to deserve this?” He asked them excitedly, ripping it open at their urging.

“An anti slip shower mat? I don’t get it?” He looked at them confused.

You were going to kill them. All three of them, together.

“Y/N was telling us the other night how you sometimes have problems staying upright in the shower,” Emily told him as the other two tried to keep a straight face.

“Y/N?”

“I’m sorry…… I’m so sorry!!”

He started to chuckle as did the other men. Standing up, he quickly walked around the table and pulled you out of your chair, wrapping his arms around you.

“I kinda let it slip too, last weekend when we were at Rossi’s.”

“Thank God!” Derek exclaimed loudly. “I thought we were gonna have to pretend we didn’t know forever. You have no idea how hard this last week has been for me, wanting to make jokes at your twos expense. Although… The shower mat. I don’t get it?”

Penelope whispered something into his ear and he grinned, nodding approvingly.

“Slippery when wet, eh.”

5

mount olympus: the young olympian goddesses

The Olympian vice. In defiance of that philosopher who as true Englishman tried to give any thinking person’s laughter a bad reputation, I would actually go as far as to rank philosophers according to the level of their laughter - right up to the ones who are capable of golden laughter. And assuming that gods, too, are able to philosophize, as various of my conclusions force me to believe, then I do not doubt when they do so, they know how to laugh in a new and superhuman fashion - and at the expense of everything serious! Gods like to jeer: it seems that even at religious observances they cannot keep from laughing.

(gods)

Don’t Hide Your Laughter

Prinxiety - [Prince (Fanciful Side) x Anxiety]

Summary: Anxiety has a habit of covering his mouth whenever he laughs. [WARNING THIS IS A TICKLE FIC]

I love feedback! Critique is greatly appreciated! OKAY I KNOOOOW I SAID A TS FIC WITHOUT PRINXIETY WAS COMING NEXT BUT C’MON THIS IDEA IS KINDA ADORABLE. HOPE Y’ALL ENJOY! And I’m sorry if it doesn’t compare to the other one… I feel like I now have standards I’m being held to… KEEP LOW EXPECTATIONS OF ME PLEASE!

THANK YOU BUDDY FOR HELPING EDIT THIS!!! GO THANK @stargazingbear​ for this too because it probs woulda sucked without her help. Also she helped me edit this at like 11 at night cause she’s awesome. 

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A DARKER SHADE OF MAGIC / A GATHERING OF SHADOWS by v. e. schwab sentence meme.

  • ❛  I’d rather die on an adventure than live standing still.  ❜
  • ❛  After all, you can kill people, but you cannot kill magic. Not truly.  ❜
  • ❛  Impossible. What a useless word, in a world with magic.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone thinks I have a death wish, you know? But I don’t want to die – dying is easy. No, I want to live, but getting close to death is the only way to feel alive. And once you do, it makes you realize that everything you were actually doing before wasn’t actually living. It was just making do. Call me crazy, but I think we do the best living when the stakes are high.  ❜
  • ❛  You have two faces. One you wear for the world at large, and the one you wear for those you love.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone’s immortal until they’re not.  ❜
  • ❛  It is as it is. It cannot be undone. So please, be grateful, and be done with it.  ❜
  • ❛  The thing about freedom? It doesn’t come naturally. Almost no one has it handed to them. I’m free because I fought for it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know you can do this. I know you can hear me. Stay with me. Listen to my voice.  ❜
  • ❛  Maybe you just got a taste of what it really means to be alive. You almost died. So now you know what it feels like to live. To fear for that life. To fight for it. And once you know, well, there’s no going back.  ❜
  • ❛  You made a mistake. Everybody makes them. Even me. I’ve made many. It’s only fair that you made one.  ❜
  • ❛  I did only what I had to do. If I could have given my life for yours, I would have.  ❜
  • ❛  A kiss for luck. Not that I need it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know. I know what and who you are. What will you do? Kill me?  ❜
  • ❛  Why am I the only one in this fucking world to be held accountable for my actions?  ❜
  • ❛  Aren’t you afraid of dying?  ❜
  • ❛  I’m sorry. For whatever happened to you. For whoever hurt you so deeply that you see things like friends and fondness as weapons instead of shields.  ❜
  • ❛  You know so little of war. Battles may be fought from the outside in, but wars are won from the inside out.  ❜
  • ❛  Between the two of us, we’ll tear the whole world down.  ❜
  • ❛  I am going to cut that smile off your face.  ❜
  • ❛  It hurts. More than dying ever did. There are days when I feel like I deserve this.  ❜
  • ❛  Death doesn’t scare me. Not nearly as much as the idea of wasting a perfectly good life in fear of it.  ❜
  • ❛ You’re always so eager to slash and stab, why couldn’t you have stabbed him.  ❜
  • ❛  Which is it, huh? You’re angry at me, or worried about me, or happy to see me? Because I can’t keep up.  ❜
  • ❛  Wouldn’t it be amazing, if we got away with it?  ❜

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Fellow Dogblrs,

I have an idea for a fun project that I would love for others to participate in: The Dogblr Flower Hunters Project. The idea is simple: walk your dog(s), keep your eyes open for flowers and take photos! Tag your photos with #dogblr flower hunters.

-flowers can be in your own yard or in your neighborhood, at parks and trails, etc– but please be respectful and don’t allow your dog to trespass or trample your neighbors’ flowers in order to get photos!

-the focus of your photos can be mainly your dog, or mainly the flowers. It’s up to you. If you can’t get your dog in every photo that’s fine too. Try to have at least one photo with your dog in each photoset to keep it Dogblr related.

-all dogs, all flowers, and all quality photos are great! I love seeing beautiful professional-quality photos but I also don’t want people to be discouraged from participating because they (like me) only have a smartphone or an old camera and not an expensive setup.

-Don’t get hung up on the quality of the shot. Get as creative as you want, process and edit if you like, or just snap a quick pic. It’s not a competition, it’s just for fun and community.

-For extra fun, if you know what the flowers are, identify them in your post. If you see someone else’s post and want to identify their flowers, go for it! Be comfortable with others reblogging your photos and adding comments.

I like the idea of seeing what’s blooming in everyone else’s neighborhood, and I love the idea of other dog walkers exploring new areas and staying out longer with their dogs just to scope out new flowers, not to mention taking the time to appreciate their surroundings. Please join the project!

First Date with the chocobros (+Ravus)

Noctis:

  • netflix and chill date
  • literally
  • he will put up Justice Monsters Five on the huge tv and lounge with you on the couch, which thankfully transforms into a bed to accommodate all the snacks and limbs
  • evening nap turns into night nap
  • super chill date with no pressure
  • he laughs more when he thinks nobody is looking!
  • sleeps on your leg by accident 
  • or is it?

Prompto:

  • Zoo date!
  • gush about cute animals and take lots of selfies with the Anak babies!
  • he’ll blush while holding your hand and by the end of the day will have progressed to putting his arm over your shoulder
  • giggling most of the conversation
  • he’ll buy you a cactuar plush from the souvenir corner
  • you want to kiss him by the end of it but he’s too flustered and runs away!
  • messages you later that night that he had the best time of his life ♥
  • and sends you all the pretty photos he took of the animals and food
  • but keeps some of them a secret because he’s too embarrassed to admit that you looked cute in the ones where you weren’t looking

Ignis:

  • Home cooked dinner date
  • he will set the lights and scents to match the evening and pick you up from whatever transportation stop you choose to use with flowers in hand
  • will detour with you to the store to buy ingredients, allowing you complete freedom to choose what you want to eat
  • pours expensive drinks for you both to sip on while chatting over the cooking preparations
  • he will flash a sweet smile when you ask to help him but will decline your generous offer because ‘royalty don’t do chores’.
  • he let’s you wipe the fog off his glasses though, and let’s you put them back on his face yourself
  • (⁎❝᷀ົ ˙̫ ❝᷀ົ⁎)
  • his hair is so soft!!!
  • his voice lulls you into a different kind of drunk after the delicious meal and you wonder if he’s used the funny mushrooms
  • he didn’t, of course, but you’re entranced nonetheless and he smells so good
  • in the morning you’re glad you bought a spare toothbrush when you were buying ingredients  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Gladio:

  • Amusement park date!
  • He will impress you with his punching bag record! he will make that mallet ring the bell! he will absolutely NOT scream on that scary ride!
  • okay maybe a little screaming
  • but only because he doesn’t want you to scream alone !(•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑
  • will win you that giant moogle plush and carry it around proudly for the rest of the trip
  • finishes your sandwich and shares his dessert with you
  • holds your hand when you least expect it and appear nonchalant about it, but you can tell he’s affected by it because he won’t stop brushing his hair back with the other hand
  • buys matching keychains so you can always remember him whenever your keys jingle
  • it’s not like you can forget after that sweet kiss at the park gates!

Ravus

  • The former prince of Tenebrae will do everything by the book: flowers, a comfortable ride, a VIP reservation for a musical, followed by a fantastic dinner in an expensive hotel
  • he will literally follow the book Lunafreya gave him about dating
  • he has no idea what he’s supposed to do most of the time if it’s not in the book
  • stiffens and goes completely silent when you try to hold his hand
  • the evening was nice but it almost feels scripted
  • so you get him to drink one two shots more than is deemed appropriate for a man of his stature
  • suddenly he’s ranting about “that fucking minister Besithia”
  • also admitting that he once attempted to sell an expensive heirloom that belonged to someone else’s dad
  • he falls asleep on your shoulder throughout the ride home, asking you about “a thing” that he must do but can’t recall the details of
  • you decide you like Ravus more than Prince Ravus
  • Lunafreya uses his phone to send you a picture of him sleeping in a pile of her dogs
  • it’s now your screen background and you regret nothing
docs.google.com
Convention Spending Tracker
Sheet1 Table, Badge, Flight, Hotel, Printing, Misc., Misc., Total Expense, Amount Made, Total, Profit,

I posted this to Twitter earlier this week and it kind of blew up, but I want to post it here too. Just a little something I use to help myself keep track of spending during convention season, made into a rainbow because why not make more things rainbow?

Whether you’re tabling or just attending for fun, conventions can get expensive - especially when you include travel costs! I’ve used this sheet for about three years now, and helps me make decisions for future conventions. Sometimes it turns out I did better at a con than I thought I did! Or maybe I didn’t do so great compared to last year and need to think about coming back again. Oh, and everything listed are purchases that you get e-mail reminders about, so if you can’t remember the cost of a table or flight, it’s probably somewhere in your e-mail. I try to fill mine out as I buy flights and order prints, but sometimes I’m digging up old e-mails after the con is over.

Some things worth considering that are not on this sheet: food costs, gas if you drive to cons, baggage fees, and shipping if you ship your supplies in advance. Please feel free to download and edit this sheet as you see fit for your own needs! I hope it helps. And let me know if you have any questions, I’m happy to answer them!

EDIT: HOLY SMOKES, lenalibrarian on Twitter took my convention spending tracker and made it 100x better!!

–> SMART CONVENTION SPENDING TRACKER <– (original link edited too!)

It now calculates your costs and total profits AUTOMATICALLY!! Which is super useful for someone who’s terrible with numbers like me. I just finished importing all my 2017 convention spending so far, and this smart sheet caught a few mistakes already. I’ll be using this sheet for years to come, thank you lenalibrarian!!

anonymous asked:

Could I request a used to be very poor/unwealthy mc trying to get used to living with jumin like she's still trying to be frugal I just think it would be really cute (I used to be really poor so this would be extra nice for me)

okay so hear me out jumin is my favorite bean out of all the beans in the mysme can and I think about stuff like this ALL the time, so I really hope you like what I’ve written for you!

- Admin Cat Mom.

  • ???? uhm???
  • this sweet man is offering you the world on a silver platter.
  • you could have literally anything you ask for, just say the word and he’ll arrange twenty different options for you to choose from.
  • yet there you are, having last night’s dinner leftovers for lunch.
  • you have this little habit of storing food in tupperware containers, that’s all there is in the fridge now thanks to you.
  • that… can’t be healthy… jesus christ.
  • honey, the chef has a perfectly good lunch already set up and ready for you to eat.
  • could it be that you didn’t like today’s menu?
  • is it the chef’s cooking? he can hire a better one if that’s the issue here.
  • jumin nO don’t fire the poor man.
  • whenever you’re out shopping together, you always seem way too wary of price tags and end up choosing the cheapest stuff regardless of whether you like it or not.
  • and he always insists you don’t?? need?? to spare any expenses??
  • and so these little incidents keep happening and he grows more and more concerned.
  • and it soon becomes a problem to someone who’s been raised in a wealthy family where struggling to meet bills has never been a thing.
  • besides, jumin han’s way of showing love is through gifts.
  • which while excessive and a bit ridiculous in his case, it’s still a valid way of showing love, especially because he pours his heart out into every gift he gets you.
  • and actually, the first time he tries pampering you with expensive gifts, things get awkward and you seem so overwhelmed.
  • truth is you feel undeserving of his gestures because there’s no way in hell you could give him something equally good in exchange.
  • when you both finally realize it’s affecting your relationship, you decide to sit down and have a heartfelt talk.
  • safe to say he doesn’t give a damn about your past nor your income as what matters now is the present and the future you’re trying to build together.
  • there’s no need to feel insecure or ashamed if you do.
  • you have financial stability now, you don’t need to worry about bills or debts, and your only priorities should be taking care of yourself, doing what you’re passionate about without any restrictions, and stay faithful to your core values because that’s why he fell in love with you.
  • among several other reasons.
  • and come on, according to what he’s heard and read, a couple should have each other’s back and take care of one another: for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
  • yes this man actually recites the marriage vows as he’s holding your hands and looking at you like the sun shines out of your behind.
  • let’s not forget as well that he’s making huge efforts to tame his inner demons and ease his need of controlling your every move and decision.
  • so how about you try relaxing a little?
  • no more tupperwares, please.
  • and just know that he’ll treasure anything you get for him.
  • it does not matter if it’s not pricey, as long as it holds your heart, it’ll be more than enough.
  • bonus: he’s probably gotten inspired by your money saving skills and your strange ideas, so he’s started many projects just for you.
  • like he now wants to make everything fancy yet convenient and cheap for commoners, and he’s constantly asking you for advice.
  • jaehee tried to talk him out of it at first but… oh well, at least that’s better than his cat projects smh.

Hey there! Easter is almost upon us, and you know what that means…bunnies! 

Let’s take a moment to discuss some bunny related facts that will hopefully help deter you from purchasing a rabbit for this holiday. 

1.) Domesticated rabbits live from 8-15 years. The Average rabbit lives around 10-12. 

2.) The baby bunnies you see in pet stores are usually around 2 months old, so they will be super cute and fluffy and affectionate! Which is exactly what pet stores WANT you to think you will be getting. BUT, this is a trap! Baby Bunny will hit puberty between 5-7 months of age, and will become a cranky, territorial, sexually frustrated TEENAGER.

3.) Teenage bunnies, particularly males, will spray urine on EVERYTHING, including you, your floor, your walls, your bed, and other bunnies. I don’t mean just a little tinkle, I mean literally the wall near your bunny’s housing will be literally coated in a crust of urine. It’s nasty, sticky, and it SMELLS.

4.) Unless you spay/neuter (which usually costs around 150-300 dollars) your bunny will continue to urinate on everything. females will rip their fur out and build nests and are much more likely to develop uterine cancer if they are not spayed.

5.) Rabbits love to rip carpet, chew on furniture, chew on baseboards, pee and poop on the floor(even if they are litter box trained, they will still scatter droppings as a way of saying “this is mine!”)

6.) Baby Bunny will triple or even quadruple in size. The average bunny is around 5 pounds, but some get even heavier than that. Dwarf breeds will average around 1.5 to 3 pounds.

7.) Rabbits are VERY social and get VERY sad and angry and depressed when kept alone in a tiny cage. Bunny should have a LARGE enclosure (NOT A PET STORE CAGE) and should have at least one friend. How would you like to live alone in a closet for your entire life? you would not!

8.) Rabbits require a daily diet of pellet (with NO added cereals, nuts, or candies) unlimited hay (all day every day, yep, it’s expensive) and a daily salad (green leafy vegetables EVERY SINGLE DAY)

9.) Think you can just leave bunny locked in a cage all day when you get bored of him? WRONG! Bunny gets bored, so he spends ALL NIGHT angrily biting and shaking the bars, digging and clawing at the floor, throwing his bowl around and biting his water bottle. He will keep you up all night long and drive you insane! (this also means is house is WAY too small and he needs more toys and room to play!)

10.) Rabbits get sick, they need to see the vet! Rabbit vets are expensive and hard to find. can you afford a rabbit vet? 

11.) Are you prepared to clean his litter box and feed him every single day? Can you spare 3-4 hours to sit and supervise him while he has his REQUIRED out-of-cage time? No? Then you should not own a rabbit.


RABBITS ARE NOT FOR EASTER. 

A RABBIT IS A HIGH MAINTENANCE, 10-12 YEAR COMMITMENT, WHICH WILL REQUIRE DAILY EXERCISE, A SPECIALIZED DIET, AND REGULAR VET VISITS. ARE YOU PREPARED?

silk | chapter one

Originally posted by bangtanboysbutterfly

chapter song | masterpost | next chapter

ceo au - jimin x reader - angst | smut

word count : 3.4k

warnings : very slight non-con

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Genuine

Bit on the ‘what if’ side of things, but I think we would all want a girl like this for Harry, in one way or another. (On a side note this is my all time favorite gif of him) 

Let me know what you thought, here, loves! I am accepting requests :-)

Originally posted by 1dcaradelevingne-blog


Harry had a habit of keeping you close.

Always, but most especially when it came to being out in public. The fans, well, it was no surprise that despite their dedication they were a bit much at times. Not just with their words, but their actions too. He wanted to protect you from it, because as much as he loved his fans, he loved you more.

He kept you tucked tightly to his side whenever he could, whether it was you two grabbing some food or simply leaving for a quick stroll, he didn’t like you being too far away. It was this fear that had kept him from admitting his feelings to you and from taking the jump from really good friends to significant others. His life was crazy, and he didn’t want that to affect you. Even when you two had been the best of friends, he had kept you hidden from the public eye. You were his, and his alone, private, a hidden treasure of sorts and he wasn’t quite ready to share you with anyone else, let alone the world.

Even today, he’s gripping your hand a bit too tightly as you struggle to keep up with his long strides. Admittedly, it’s a bit crazier than usual. It’s one of the boys’ biggest concerts on this tour, which is exactly why Harry had insisted on flying you out for it. It’s not that you hadn’t seen the boys perform before, you had. You’d been backstage at the X factor and with Harry every step of the way since then. However, you had never been to a show in the U.S., and Harry knew better than to listen to your protests of the plane ticket being too expensive. “Doesn’t matter, love. Want yeh here.”

It really came as no surprise then,  that the fans are lined up outside the hotel in a gregorious multitude, and that the roped polls and army of men dressed in black and appointed to your protection  looked significantly tiny in comparison.  The concert isn’t until tomorrow, the boys getting a much needed day of rest before. Or, they had planned.

You can’t help but look around in awe at all the commotion. Despite the lack of red carpet under your feet, you feel like you are indeed walking one. The fans are screaming left and right, startling bright signs waving around carelessly in exchange for even a second of the boys’ attention. There’s crying too, a lot in fact. You can hear it from all different directions as breathless pleas and sobs echo back and forth around you. The other boys were already inside the hotel lobby, behind the glass doors and away from the quiet roar of the crowd. They had opted to make Harry and you sit in the very back seats that the car offered, something about not wanting to lose lunch being their reason. Harry’s still stringing you along, mindful that you’re taking it all in but hurrying to get the pair of you inside as one of the bodyguards on his right is talking to him about god knows what.  His head is low as he listens intently to what the man is saying. When Harry’s career had first taken off, he would come home every once in 

awhile and be ecstatic about the fans, telling you stories about how heartfelt they were. It was so endearing to watch him, his green eyes alight as he recalled to you the moments that stood out to him in the sea of press releases and talk shows and signings. As time went on, though, it wasn’t that his stories diminished but rather the light in his eyes did. He still had lots to tell you, but you knew Harry well enough to know something was wrong under the surface. 

“Already tired of the fame, Styles?” You had teased him with a  quirk of your eyebrow. 

His head had snapped up from his phone at that, eyebrows furrowed and forehead creased. “No. Never. Yeh know that, love. S’just…” He mumbled, trailing off as he closed his eyes and ran a hand down his face. 

You had frowned at that, leaning across the booth and grabbing his wrist in your fingers. 

“Harry, what is it?” You ask, dragging his hand away from his face. He sighs, opening the tired eyes you had been avoiding to acknowledge since he came back. 

“They’re lovely, the fans. I would never question that, yeh know? We wouldn’t be anything without em. I- we, owe them so much.” He rambles, eyes narrowed as he tries to find the right words. 

“Harry.” You whisper softly, releasing his wrist to intertwine your fingers with his. “Look at me.” You demand after a quick beat. 

He does, blinking at you. 

You shake your head at him gently, “You don’t have to convince me love, I know exactly who you are. S’me you’re talking too, remember?”

His shoulders had sag a bit at that and after a little more coaxing he had admitted to you that it was exhausting at times, but there isn’t a thing he would change.

“Harry, you’re entitled to be tired. You handle it so well, you know that don’t you? All those interviewers looking to get a rise out of you.. You’re wonderful, Harry, and I’m glad I’m not the only who knows that.” You had responded with a squeeze of his hand.

He had flashed you a grateful smile in response.

“Although, I can say it was easier when thousands of girls weren’t pining for you, love.” You tease with a smirk, earning a loud chortle of laughter from him and a shake of his head, brown curls flopping around.

“S’only one girl I fancy, really.” He responds, lifting his hand to his mouth.

And you’re just about to enter the hotel, a mere few steps from the stairs when you spot the neon sign. It’s hard not to see it, really, but the words scrawled onto it is what causes you to come to a  stumbling stop. Harry comes to a stop too when he has to tug on your hand, your grip loosening from his. He’s instantly alert, ignoring the babbling man next to him as he lifts his head and turns over his shoulder to look at you. You’re turned away from him, staring somewhere off into the crowd and he wants to grab your attention, lean forward and grab your hand once again but he knows you’d only stop if it was important.

You don’t wait to offer him even a look of explanation as your step away from him, backtracking a few feet. The bodyguards and security members they have stationed behind you two and babbling away into their walkie talkies, spreading the news of the sudden stop. You’re stepping dangerously closer to the poll, the fans all screaming at you but you seem unphased. “Harry, she can’t just-” One of the bodyguards begins to lecture, and Harry knows he should say something. He takes a step forward to call after you, the guards around him mimicking his moves and keeping a tight box around him. But that’s when he notices the sign the girl you’re headed for is holding. He feels his heart pang a bit, every time he reads one of those signs he feels so.. Powerless. Him, big star Harry Styles who feels as if he’s the most menial man in the world were confronted with those ferocious words. Through twitter dm’s and instagram comments, to the posters he’d seen and the things he’d heard about fans, young girls thinking such disheartening things. He felt most frustrated with this, out of everything that came along with his career. 

You’re stepping closer to the fan whose eyes are wide as she lowers the sign and her mouth takes a widening ‘o’ shape. The guard closest to you grabs your elbow a bit possessively, causing Harry to frown. You turn, looking down at your elbow and up at the guard and although he can only see the side of your face Harry knows you’re giving the burlish man the sweetest of smiles. He’s talking to you in an urgent voice but you shake your head at him, extending the arm he isn’t holding onto to pat his forearm gently. Harry smiles a bit, the tension between his eyebrows unfolding. He recognizes the action all too well, it’s the one you give him when he’s worried or stressed or simply frustrated. A simple pat to the cheek and a kiss to his forehead with a placating, “Relax, love. You’ll be just fine.” The bodyguard, fond of Harry, turns to give him a questioning look and Harry nods at him. He releases your elbow, and you unaware of the exchange step closer to the fan.

You smile at her, black letters painted across her flushed cheeks, 1D taut against her freckled skin. You lean forward and offer your hand, and she carelessly drops the sign to the floor to hold on it. 

“Hi, love. What’s your name?” You ask over the roaring girls around you, everyone spreading the word that Harry Styles’ girlfriend is speaking to fans. 

“C-caroline.” She stutters, eyes wide and voice trembling not nearly as much as her hand is in yours. 

“That’s a lovely name, I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you.” You respond with a smile. 

“I know who you are! I mean- I..” She stutters, ashamed of her sudden outburst. 

You smile at, flushing yourself. “I saw your sign, Caroline.”

  Her eyes go wide and her face drops to stare at said sign, laying on the ground with the word side facing up. Harry, you saved my life. 

She glances up at you, eyes swimming a bit. Caroline clears her throat, blinking at you, “Can I tell you?” She gestures to the sign with her foot.

You nod at once, and she begins to spill as much of her story as she can, tripping over the details and gasping with deep breaths to share enough in the short time you two have together. You nod along when you can, encouraging her with your eyes. The girls, around you and maybe a bit farther away too have fallen quiet as well.

When she’s done, you smile at her. “Oh, love. I’m sorry to hear that.” She smiles at you and even without the cameras on you, you would’ve considered your words just as carefully.

You clear your throat a bit and you address not just Caroline but all the girls around you, You shake your head at her, bringing your other hand up to sandwich hers between yours. “Being a teenager is a  proper pain in the arse, isn’t it?” You ask, addressing the girls around you two that leaning on their toes to get a better angle with their smart phones and listen to your words.

They laugh in response to your inquiry, nodding. You grin at them, taking in all of their wide eyed faces and expectant stares.

“I hope-” You stop at that, biting your lower lip and shaking your head before you start again, “I want you all to know it gets better, yeah? I know it seems like it won’t ever end or get better, but I promise you it does. And you’ve got to keep your pretty heads up. Focusing on the good things, it’ll help loves. Good people, good books, I mean you’ve already got good music to keep you company.” You add with a smile.

The girls nod all together and you feel your heart swell a bit when Caroline finally flashes her smile at you.

“You’ve got a beautiful smile, Caroline. Should wear it more often.” You offer as a parting sentence, before you pull your hands away from hers and wave at the group before turning back.

“Wait! Could- do you mind signing this?” Caroline cries, sign outstretched towards you. 

Your eyebrows furrow together, “Me?” 

“Yes, you’re awesome!” She screams, causing you to laugh. 

“I haven’t got a pen..” You mutter slightly, glancing over your shoulder at the bodyguard who gives you a pressing look. 

“I’ve got one, pet.” A warm voice says as a hand slips around your lower back. You turn and see Harry beaming at you with a pen in his hand. 

“Thanks, love.” You respond as you sign it for Caroline before she asks for Harry’s, who obliges, and after that the fans pick up the ir screaming again hand outstretched and waiting to grab at your boyfriend. 

“Let’s go yeah, unless yeh want to stop for anymore detours.” He mumbles into your ear before pressing his lips to your temple.

 “No, no, let’s go.” You nod and let him lead you towards the stairs, waving at the girls one last time.

The glass doors shut behind your and the other boys have taken a seat in the waiting area, standing up with a dramatic sigh when you two finally enter. You shoot them a quick look before Harry is towering in front of you with his hands locked tightly around your waist.  

You glance up at him hesitantly, expecting a scoff with a wild “what were yeh thinkin’ love?” but instead a met with a warm smile. Harry’s smile. His dimples are popping and his eyes are shining and you know it’s not from the reflection of the florescent lights in the hotel lobby. 

“What’re you smiling about?” You ask, leaning up to poke his dimple.

 He chuckles, turning his face to press a swift kiss to your finger. “Jus’.. happy, sweetheart.” He mumbles, leaning forward and impatiently kissing your forehead. 

You hum, gripping the fabric of his jacket and pulling yourself closer to him. The cameras outside are probably having a field day with what had just happened and Harry’s sudden burst of affection. “She was lovely, wasn’t she? Caroline.” You clarify, glancing back out the glass doors at the still boisterous fans. 

“She was.” He agrees, one hand reaching up to tilt your chin back in his direction.

You humph at him, “Needy, aren’t you?”

His response is a grunt and pressing his thumb deeper into your chin, before he grabs it and brings you forward in a scorching kiss.

When he finally pulls away, forehead resting against yours and puff puffs of breath warm against your cheek, he speaks, “Thank yeh for that, love. Yeh didn’t have to.. That was sweet of yeh. That girl’s gonna remember that for a long time.” He mutters, kissing your cheek.

It was the exact genuity that had attracted him to you in the first place. How simply it came to you to make someone else’s day better without a second thought. 

You smile at him, eyes narrowed in confusion, “All I did was talk to her, give her a listening ear. Anyhow, she adores you  and I reckon if we could leave her a little piece of you, she’d have something to cheer her up a bit. At least for a while, you know help keep her grounded. ”  

Harry shakes his head at you, ringed fingers brushing across your cheek, “Yeh did so much more than that, angel.  Don’t think those girls are gonna be thinking about me at all. The difference yeh just made…“ He trails off before clearing his throat and restarting, “Love yeh. Yeh know that, right?”He gripes suddenly, forehead bumping against yours to punctuate his words. 

You give him a genuine smile, laughing slightly as you tilt your head up to brush your nose against his lightly, “Love you, Harry.” 

Advice for anyone who wants to get into birding!
  • You don’t have to travel far or go to super remote places to see good birds. That’s one of the great things about them! Birds are very accessible (too accessible) wildlife. You can see cool species doing cool things at your local park, wooded lot, retention pond, or landfill.
  • Don’t feel like you have to shell out for super expensive binoculars/scopes/cameras/etc, especially when you’re just starting out. 
  • NEVER make eye contact with a wild bird
  • Your local Audubon chapter or other bird club can be a great resource for learning local hotspots, and building up your ID skills. These clubs are usually happy (desperate) for new blood
  • Wear body armor no less than 4 inches thick. Kevlar highly recommended
  • A good field guide is a must have. Even experienced birders keep one on hand for reference. There are also great bird ID apps. I use Merlin myself
  • If a bird’s shadow passes over you, you must burn all your clothes and purify your body immediately.
  • I always recommend visiting bodies of water for novice birders. First, they’re great places to see wildlife in general. But mostly it’s that wading birds and waterfowl are big, easier to ID, conspicuous, usually stationary, and the nearby water is convenient for emergency purification rituals.
  • Yes, they are watching you too.
  • Remember, birds are wildlife and can easily become stressed out. Please give them their space, especially in the spring and summer breeding season.
  • Birds do not have teeth. If you see one grinning at you do not trust it, it is a trick!