but this was the most adorable thing i've seen in my life ok

The types and what I think of them based on what I've seen from my friends(and probably a little insulting)

~as an INTJ

INTP
- quiet
- can make a bitch face that makes you cry
- probably thinks u stupid
- says that MBTI is shit
- fashionista
- has an ENFP friend(“ENFP no!”)
- savage
- that friend who has ultra weird ideas when drunk
- probably most adorable smile on earth
- smart
- most of the time just rising eyebrows and blinking

ENTJ
- bossy af
- prima ballerina
- she is beauty she is grace
- she will punch you in da face
- always in warm socks
- also an actress
- knows how to build things
- basically good at everything
- will shout at you if you do something wrong
- probably slept with almost all male friends

ENTP
- a n n o y i n g AF
- never shuts up
- meme queen
- so loud
- not funny jokes
- make up queen
- at least smart
- thinks she’s better than you(and maybe she is)
- if you take a sip from her mug u die
- has an ENFP slave
- kinda selfish
- another fashionista
- if she laughs the whole room laughs with her
- soooo much self confidence wow

INFP
- THAT SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE
- garbage lord
- writer buddy
- has ton of OC’s AND GAY SHIPS
- cannot into decisions
- junky food
- understands(really)
- don’t like loud people
- constant lala land
- savage without even noticing
- 4w5
- has 8 minute long video of herself eating french fries on her phone
- impressive self control
- cute laugh
- cute
- the best person to rant with

ENFP
- can’t stay in one place for a minute
- suddenly disappears in a middle of a party
- daydreaming a lot
- cheerful
- likes to drink A LOT
- too many friends
- nice for everyone ugh
- that laugh which sounds like a puppy riding a pink bicycle in a tuxedo
- can bring ENTP back to earth

ENFJ
- mom friend
- has too many friends HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE
- gonna steal your friends without even noticing
- likes fancy drinks and kitschy things
- obsessed with doggos
- sudden outbursts of anger
- hypochondriac
- really anxious when driving
- doesn’t understand a concept of a personal space

ISTJ
- another bitch face
- can rise one eyebrow HOW U DO DIS?????
- doesn’t understand memes
- smart
- lack of self confidence
- secretly hates u
- wears comfy clothes but looks so good
- has a lot of savings but hardly ever uses them
- they knows better ok? don’t even try to tell them that they are wrong
- don’t particularly like pets
- perfect teeth
- so so so smart once again
- sometimes are rather calm but sometimes… don’t ask

ESTJ
- that kid who asks too many questions during your presentation
- constant bitch face
- hot
- stingy
- falls asleep during parties
- a rant person
- bossy
- hard working
- teachers like her

ESFJ
- will help you EVEN WHEN YOU HAVENT ASKED FOR HELP
- has a lot of friends
- drinks a lot
- hard-working
- daddy’s little princess/mama’s boy
- assertive
- smoking a lot
- tells everyone what to do

ISTP
- white Kanye West
- would kill u if u did something with his shoes
- likes weird electronic genres of music I can’t even name
- on 9gag all the time
- knows all memes
- League of Legends pro player
- can make funny faces
- looks like he was angry
- black humor(especially likes jokes about Jews)
- awkward silence gains a whole new meaning

ESFP
- the whitest person I know
- “what do u meat it was sexist?? it was funny!!!!”
- only wears yellow pants
- likes PE teacher probably a little too much
- can’t find a girlfriend
- will massage your feet if u don’t watch them properly
- has stupid ideas
- likes basically every person
- drinks wine at parties even though he says that true man should drink only vodka
- don’t know when someone is mean to him

ESTP
- loud
- hey lets go to the another city and get drunk!!! because why not
- class clown
- talks about her life too much like seriously
- and also about various secretions of her body
- probably gonna end up in jail
- smart and stupid at the same time
- lazy
- has problems with concentration
- talkative
- has problems with self-esteem which she covers acting out like a douche

Don’t take this personally lol

spiritedopal  asked:

Hey I think I've got a request :3 sfw. So it'd be an AU, I don't know what type. Bill and Dipper probably wouldn't know each other yet (or just never talked to each other) and at some point they find themselves alone in a room (*shrugs*) and Bill goes to Dipper like, "hey, have you seen the man of my life? He's in this room right now" (insert wink) and Dip would be like "but we're the only ones here" or something before actually understanding what he meant. Aaand the rest is up to you^^

Ok sorry it took so long. So it’s a collage AU I guess? anyway I hope you like it.

-Requests are still open-

Words: 970

The party was loud and crazy with tons of people and Pyronica and Kryptos had successfully smuggled several crates of various kinds of beer in despite the college’s no alcohol rule. In other words, this was Bill’s kind of party. 

He walked around saying hey to people. Suddenly he bumped into someone. It was a girl with completely rainbow hair and a rhinestone encrusted cut off shirt that claimed unicorns were jerks. She looked more like she should be at a rave not a collage party.

“Sorry girl, didn’t see ya.”
She looked at him.
“It’s cool. You’re Bill right?”
“I guess all pretty girls have heard of me then.”

Bill winked at her for the sole purpose of being flirty. He wasn’t really interested in this glittery human rainbow. The girl giggled and punched him in the arm. The intent had been playful but she hit hard and Bill knew there would be a bruise in that spot later.

“You flirt. Sorry, I’m taken but if you want to hit on someone my brother is hiding in one of the back rooms and he’s single. You’re cute and he’s gay as fuck so you might have a chance.”

She winked at Bill.
“Good luck.”

Keep reading

The signs from a Cancer Point of view (use 🌞 + 🌜):
  • (My posts are backwards on purpose)
  • Pisces: Oh my lord, you can be so silly. I love how infectious your giggle is. You can think of things in ways I would have never even thought; you're almost too creative for your own good. I know sometimes you're not so good at art, like most posts predict, but the way you speak is beautiful, like your words were perfectly arranged to form a mosaic of variegated interpretations. You let everyone's experiences influence you to the point where you take them on as your own, and that's ok. I know that just helps you stay close to the ones you love, as if living in their memories with them strengthens your connection with them.
  • Aquarius: You can be distant, but care with every pulse of your heart. Sometimes that's what confuses me. There's a reason for everything to you. You want to know cause and effect, but I'm worried for the day when you realise that not everything has an explanation; at least not one easily confined by mere words. You're not devoid of emotion. You're just much better at deciding when and how to deal with them. How do you do that? How do you know how to reach out for help without burdening everyone?
  • Capricorn: We are opposites. You work so hard to be happy, that sometimes I think you hardly stop to enjoy even the small things that have a magical air to them; like the plush towels against your skin, or the pattern of the sky that will only freeze for a few seconds more. To you, it's all about pushing forward and getting things done, and I love your motivation, but don't you realise how stressed out you get yourself? You can be cold, but that's only because sometimes you don't want to stop to feel...you know what will happen if you do.
  • Sagittarius: I am amazed at how much patience I have with you. You're so carefree, and I don't believe I have ever seen you stressed. Sometimes I get frustrated with how you treat others, but I know you don't mean to hurt people on purpose. I love how you want to be a free thinker, you don't let others cloud your thoughts or decisions, unless you really love them, then in that case you trust their opinions. Not everyone can or could ever earn your trust. You have clarity when most others are stressed because you've detached yourself from them so successfully. I'm glad that you of all people could take the weight that you do, though I'm not pleased that you have to in the first place. You handle beatings with grace, and you hold your ground firmly.
  • Scorpio: You're the most passionate person I know. When you talk about what you love or hate, I can see the propellers churn in your eyes. You love to love and hate to hate. I know it's hard to let people in, but I'm thankful you chose me of all people. I'm sorry I can't always be there when you sob in your bed late at night, but you always hold off when you're ready. That's ok too. I know you don't like to be pushed. Sometimes you let others passions overtake your own and you get so confused and tired that it's hard to face anyone. You want to love so badly, but you're always doubting yourself. Your thoughts can be overwhelming and it seems lonely in crowds, even around your own family, but even you need to trust more than one person.
  • Libra: You of all people know what to do and say all the time. I enjoy just sitting back and watching you talk and interact with people; you get that everyone is different, and you treat them according to how they are. If only people had that same respect towards you. I love how you can diffuse conflict as if you're stroking the nuzzle of a wild horse. You listen and think before you speak. You thrive on the subject of philosophy because you think, and it does, makes you a better person. You love everyone and you value friendships and relationships. You don't know who the right partner is, but I know when you find them, they will make you feel like the only person in the world, just like you do with everybody else.
  • Virgo: There's a lot to worry about. You are the one that I wish I was the most like. You live in the moment, without leaving the past or planning for the future. You're aware of the things larger than life, and you respect them, but you understand how all the little things contribute to the infinite tapestry. I wish I could notice and appreciate as you do. I know you focus too much on the tangible, and I understand that it's easy to get lost in the world of perfection and imperfections, to ignore the thoughts and feelings of others. Most people think you are cold, but I think there's more to it than that. Maybe you just know what to do with your feelings, and they're under your control, and yours alone. You're calm and always seem to be at ease. In no way should that be a crime, after all, many could learn a thing or two from you.
  • Leo: I find a lot of admiration towards how confident you are. Your presence alone is awe-inspiring. Everything you do--the way you walk, how you speak, your gestures, everything--looks so effortless but well thought out. Watching you is like enjoying a movie where every movement is perfect. I love the way you make me feel like we've know each other for years. I am at ease and comfortable by your very presence. One might expect your voice to be loud and authoritative, but it's soothing and suggestive more than anything. You want to make everyone feel like your friend, and I know it has no malevolent purposes, but it's for your own conscious because you can't bear a single person disliking you.
  • Cancer: I could tell you how seething your own mind is, but I'm sure you already know that. You can be so optimistic that you become blind to the worse in human nature. You have fallen victim to many schemes of manipulation, and each time you've beaten yourself up for it. It's ok to yell and scream and cuss. In fact, it's normal to let yourself explode. Nothing could ever right the wrongs that you can never seem to forget. I'm sure that even though they haven't made it up to, or apologised, that they still love you. Not everyone is like you where they can hold onto their emotions and keep it from lapping over the edge. People say things they don't mean, and they make mistakes. It's ok to not be able to forget, you just have to find a way to love again despite their wrong doings.
  • Gemini: When I am with you, I am never bored. There's always something to talk about, and you're willing to look at every side of a story because you love to be fascinated. You are so animated when you speak, as if you're trying to replay and exert the experience to everyone so that they can experience it as you once did. I love your acceptance of art in all its forms but most of all, I appreciate your desire for knowledge. You may not be the smartest, but you are the one to show me how to think.
  • Taurus: I see a lot of posts categorising you as being a glutton for food. Truth is, you love to enjoy things you like, and by no means is that bad. Some people talk about what they like and you feel their radiance through their words, but with you, you don't have to say anything. I feel your content seeping into my veins and I too become enveloped in this world of yours where the finer things of life are adored. I value your opinion because you learn to know and feel every inch of something before you can decide to love or hate it. You have to know for sure because once you make a decision, by God you stick to it. I love how you're supporting and refreshing for anyone who needs it. You've made some good calls, and also so bad ones, but you've learned from both and you can separate truth and fiction like nothing I've seen before.
  • Aries: You are the epitome of fire. I know it's easy to think of everything at once, and it gets extremely overwhelming. I think you tend to overlook other people's feelings for the small minute things that really don't matter. Your opinions and desires matter, just understand that you can't make anyone agree with you. You have a silver tongue, and it's hard to resist your logic, because despite how wrong you may be, you take record time in thinking up of an argument and at the same time shred your adversary to pieces. Some say it's water that wears you down slow and painfully, but I have witnessed the hot flash of your flames burn and dissipate. You get caught up in the moment. It's no biggie. I respect that you have confidence, I love that. You are into fast paced things, and I don't think I've ever seen you relax without falling asleep. You really amaze me at how adept you are at working under so much pressure. You've been through a lot, heaven knows, but we both know you've become a better person because of it. Your optimism is what pushed me through my own experiences, and I am most grateful for you especially.
Heavenly Commentary: Deathly Hallows Pt1
  • Sirius: I can't believe he broke the mirror.
  • James: Didn't really need it, did he?
  • Sirius: Still. I liked that mirror.
  • ***
  • Lily: That's a nice little tribute.
  • Albus: Yes. Elphias always was a generous man. Although Rita Skeeters is far more thrilling.
  • James: Harry thinks otherwise.
  • Albus: He will learn the truth. That no one is without regret. Rita Skeeter was surprisingly quick.
  • Cedric: Even dead we can't get rid of her.
  • ***
  • James: I never thought I'd see Harry trying so hard to save these people. After everything they’ve done to him.
  • Lily: Our son is better than us both.
  • ***
  • James: That was downright emotional for Dudley.
  • Albus: I imagine that he is beginning to see through the veil of his youth. One’s parents are not always correct.
  • ***
  • James: The guard is all here.
  • Lily: Obviously. Oh yeah. How was Moony’s wedding?
  • Sirius: Simple. You know him. Not an extravagant bone in his body.
  • James: I'm betting Tonks got an extravagant bon-OW!
  • Lily: Shut up!
  • ***
  • Cedric: Seven Harry Potters fly out of a house. What does Voldemort do?
  • Albus: He will assume they will give the real Harry to Alastor. As he is the strongest wizard present. He is unable to understand that strength is not the factor here.
  • Sirius: I don't understand. Who is taking Harry?
  • Albus: Hagrid of course. There is no one there who loves Harry quite like Hagrid.
  • ***
  • James: Even dead you're right.
  • Albus: It appears not all habits die hard.
  • ***
  • Lily: I have a bad feeling. Nothing is ever this easy.
  • James: Oh shit. No!
  • Hedwig: Hoot hoot.
  • Cedric: Trust me. I know.
  • ***
  • James: I thought he was going to die.
  • Lily: How did Harry do that? He didn't look in any shape to defend himself.
  • Albus: I have my theories. But imagine the suspense if I choose not to share them.
  • Sirius: I never said this when we were alive but, you're a dick.
  • Alastor: I said that constantly.
  • Albus: Old friend! It's terrible to see you here. Welcome to the party.
  • Alastor: Where are we?
  • Albus: The next great adventure. Your appearance is rather disconcerting with two normal eyes.
  • ***
  • Lily: Poor George.
  • James: Everyone is going crazy. They've been betrayed.
  • Sirius: And of course Snape cursed his ear off. Part of the plan Albus?
  • Albus: Let's find out.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Grieve later fools. Fight the war now.
  • Cedric: Constant vigilance?
  • Alastor: Exactly.
  • ***
  • James: Remus says Harry is like me and yet he makes it sound like an insult.
  • Lily: Because it was. Something is broken inside of him.
  • ***
  • Sirius: They've done all this?
  • James: They're children going to war. What do you expect?
  • ***
  • Lily: That had the feeling of a kiss goodbye.
  • Alastor: Smart girl.
  • ***
  • James: Happy birthday harry.
  • Lily: He's all grown up now.
  • James: But he's still our boy.
  • ***
  • Sirius: You left them stuff?
  • Albus: But of course. A few trinkets I hope will be of use. Oh Rufus. If only you put this energy into helping me.
  • ***
  • James: The Snitch he swallowed. Damn it but that's genius.
  • Albus: Thank you.
  • Lily: “I open at the close”?
  • Albus: I have always appreciated a healthy use of theatricality.
  • ***
  • Lily: Of course Luna would recognise him. I really do adore that girl.
  • ***
  • James: Do you remember our wedding?
  • Lily: I'll never forget it.
  • James: I wish we could have had something like this. Not the rushed one we had.
  • Lily: It was perfect and I'll never think otherwise.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah fate. It is always nice to know when one is on the right path.
  • Sirius: ...ok?
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh...Albus is this tr-
  • Alastor: Enough.
  • Cedric: But Prof-
  • Alastor: Enough! There are bigger problems right now.
  • James: The Ministry has fallen.
  • Cedric: Then it's over.
  • Albus: No Mr Diggory. Now it begins.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Excellent Miss Granger. She's prepared.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Why are they being so nice?
  • Sirius: It’s not actually mercy if they can't actually kill them.
  • ***
  • Albus: Charming, Alastor. But those would not stop Severus. Given his innocence they wouldn't need to.
  • Alastor: What?
  • Cedric: I'll fill you in.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • James: Oh man, do you remember that picture?
  • Sirius: Last day of our first year. We were children.
  • James: But not for very long
  • ***
  • Lily: I remember that letter. What happened to the rest of it?
  • James: Probably Snape. Greasy bastard.
  • Albus: ...
  • Sirius: Just because he's on a secret mission to save the world doesn't mean he can't be a bastard.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Regulus, oh God. You did...why didn't you tell me?
  • James: Like Hermione said. He was trying to protect you
  • Albus: Did you find your younger brother Mr Black?
  • Sirius: No.
  • Albus: Wherever he is, I honour him. I would never have been able to drink that potion alone.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh Remus...no.
  • James: Why would he...
  • Lily: Har- oh no.
  • Sirius: Moony...
  • James: You did good Harry. You did the right thing.
  • ***
  • James: No. No!
  • Lily: NO! FUCK THAT BITCH! NOT AGAIN!
  • James: FINISH HER! END HER LIFE!
  • ***
  • Alastor: Fools! Do they think these kids are going to school?
  • Sirius: They don't think. Wow, Kreacher looks...happy.
  • Cedric: I guess that's what happens when you're treated with common decency.
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you think they're ready?
  • Alastor: As ready as they'll ever be.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Don't ask a teenage boy what he was doing in the bathroom, Hermione. You may not like the answer.
  • Lily: I swear I will hit you.
  • ***
  • Albus: Let the games begin.
  • ***
  • Lily: Those are muggle bodies. I think I'm going to be sick.
  • ***
  • James: That's why he was so eager to get to work. His wife is on trial.
  • Lily: It’s not a trial. It's a sentencing.
  • ***
  • Lily: Holy shit. It's her!
  • Cedric: Why can't they just take the locket and run?
  • James: Because they don't know if she still has it. And stealth is still needed.
  • Albus: Also because that man is the Minister himself.
  • ***
  • Alastor: I think I preferred it when Crouch Jnr had it.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Mr Weasley is terrifying.
  • James: I think Harry agrees.
  • ***
  • Lily: Well so much for stealth!
  • James: Don't look at me like that! He's your son too!
  • Sirius: They might actually make it out.
  • Lily: Crap! Yaxley has them! He's seen Grimmauld Place!
  • Cedric: So where are we now?
  • ***
  • Lily: Ron must be really afraid if he's stopped saying “Voldemort”.
  • Albus: Perhaps not the most foolish of precautions.
  • ***
  • Alastor: You know why he's after Gregorovitch, don't you Albus.
  • Albus: I do. I'm curious to see if it will work.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Not a Christian but I appreciate the effort Potter.
  • ***
  • James: Ron isn't holding up too well.
  • Alastor: Some people aren't cut out for field work.
  • ***
  • Lily: The sword...?
  • Albus: Indeed.
  • James: So where is it?
  • Albus: Therein lies the question.
  • ***
  • Lily: He left...
  • James: I can't believe it. He's gone...
  • ***
  • Cedric: That's it then. He can't find them. He's really gone.
  • Albus: Perhaps.
  • ***
  • James: He doesn't care about the sword. He wants to go home.
  • Lily: Back to where it all started.
  • ***
  • James: Welcome home Lily.
  • Lily: I never thought th- they built us a statue?
  • James: Damn right they did.
  • Sirius: Where’s my statue? Bastards.
  • James: Why would they build you one idiot? You helped kill us. Remember?
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought Dumbledore would be here to see his family’s graves. But I'm guessing he's actually with them now so never mind.
  • ***
  • Lily: He's crying...
  • James: So are we...
  • ***
  • James: Do you think they would've gone to all this trouble if Voldemort hadn’t been defeated?
  • Lily: Of course not. We'd have been just three more victims.
  • ***
  • James: Something isn't right. Bathilda was the sharpest woman I've ever met.
  • Lily: And now she looks...dead.
  • Albus: That would be because she is indeed deceased.
  • Sirius: How could you know that?
  • Albus: I just came from visiting her.
  • Cedric: Then who is that?
  • Alastor: What, not who. And that is Bait.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Holy fucking shit!
  • James: Run Harry!
  • Lily: Hermione! That was close. What's wrong with him?
  • Albus: I believe he is trapped inside the memories of Voldemort. The memories associated with the last time he stood there.
  • Lily: Oh...
  • ***
  • James: Grindelwald?!?
  • ***
  • Lily: Do you have anything to say?
  • Albus: Keep watching.
  • ***
  • James: Is that a...
  • Lily: Snape. That's his patronus.
  • Cedric: How do you know?
  • Lily: Because that's mine.
  • ***
  • Lily: Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off. Take the Horcrux off.
  • James: Dammit Harry.
  • Cedric: This can't end well.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I take that back!
  • Sirius: About damn time Ron!
  • ***
  • Lily: Family.
  • ***
  • James: This is genuinely hilarious.
  • Cedric: Hermione is a badass.
  • Lily: So cute. They're all back together.
  • ***
  • Albus: Ah boys. I wish I was there to help. But alas I am not.
  • ***
  • Alastor: More breadcrumbs Albus? If you trust Severus so much why didn't you just give him a letter to send to them?
  • Albus: Old friend, in this matter, the journey is far more important than the goal itself.
  • ***
  • James: The Deathly Hallows?
  • Lily: What are they?
  • Sirius: A children's story.
  • Albus: I think you'll find, Mr Black, that most children's stories are based on truth.
  • ***
  • Alastor: They should never have come here!
  • Cedric: They took his daughter! He had no choice.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Albus...are the Hallows real?
  • Albus: They are.
  • Sirius: How do you know? How can you be sure?
  • Albus: Because I've held them all.
  • ***
  • Lily: I really hope you haven't just split them apart again.
  • Albus: They are behaving as I expected them to.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh it’s good to hear them again.
  • Sirius: Keep the faith.
  • James: NO! Ah Harry don't use the name.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Stay calm. Stick to your story.
  • Cedric: Too late. They've been found out.
  • James: They're taking him to Voldemort.
  • Lily: I think Harry is with him already.
  • ***
  • Albus: Poor Draco. I tried to help him.
  • Sirius: No you did the bare minimum. If you really tried to help him then we wouldn't be watching this.
  • Albus: I do believe you're right. But necessity demanded.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. They're going to torture her.
  • ***
  • James: The mirror?
  • Sirius: What use is that going to be?
  • ***
  • Sirius: Pettigrew! You treacherous bastard!
  • James: Wait! What? No!
  • Lily: ...he's dead. What just happened.
  • Albus: Love. Mercy. Forgiveness. Things such as these can forge terribly great magic. Harry spared Pettigrews life and created a debt. Peter's hand, a construct of pure magic, just repaid it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: He's not here.
  • James: I don't think he wanted to meet the two people he betrayed and the one he blackmailed.
  • Sirius: He's gotten smarter. But I think I'll hunt him down.
  • ***
  • Albus: Oh my...
  • Lily: He's coming! You have to go!
  • James: Woah that was close! DOBBY! Excellent timing!
  • Cedric: Shell Cottage. Nice na- oh no. Don't...
  • Dobby: Master Dumbledore sir. What has happened?
  • James: Dobby. We are Harry Potters parents. We've been watching you help our son for five years. You've been so noble. So brave.
  • Lily: We want you to know, we love you so much Dobby. And you will always be with friends here.
  • Dobby: Kind Miss has Harry Potters eyes.
  • ***
  • Dobby: Such kind words from Sirs and Misses. And Harry Potter is sad.
  • Lily: Of course he is sad. He loved you more than we do. He is your friend.
  • ***
  • James: I don't understand what's going on.
  • Lily: Me neither.
  • Alastor: Then why don't you both shut up and listen to your son explain it all?
  • ***
  • Albus: Harry. You amazing young man. I'm proud of you my boy.
  • James: You had the Elder Wand? You took it from Grindelwald?
  • Albus: I did.
  • Lily: And why not give it to Harry?
  • Albus: You must pay closer attention Mrs Potter.
  • ***
  • Cedric: So we're planning again. But this time to break into Gringotts.
  • James: Should be fun. Did Godric really steal the sword?
  • Albus: It’s quite possible. No human account would ever admit to it. And who's to say the goblin history isn't biased either.
  • Lily: You were a teacher right?
  • ***
  • James: You're back. Moony has a son.
  • Sirius: Well I’ll be dammed. Good for you mate.
  • Lily: He looks so happy.
  • ***
  • Alastor: Weasley. As subtle as ever.
  • Cedric: Hermione is the only one who appreciates subtlety. The other two prefer a wand to the face.
  • ***
  • Albus: Once more unto the breach
  • ***
  • James: I recognise his voice.
  • Lily: Travers is the one who almost killed me. And then you dropped your wand and beat him half to death.
  • Sirius: Potter, your laziness is biting your son in the arse. “Half to death” finish the job!
  • ***
  • Lily: He just used the Imperius Curse...
  • James: It was necessary.
  • Alastor: Be grateful he's managed to avoid killing anyone. What was your bodycount?
  • Lily: More than zero.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit! This is the ministry all over again.
  • James: Onwards. Get the Horcrux.
  • ***
  • Lily: They’ve got i- GODDAMMIT GRIPHOOK!
  • Alastor: They should have never trusted the goblin!
  • James: They had no choice! Time to go son!
  • Lily: WHY DOES HE ALWAYS INSIST ON FLYING!
  • JAMES: WHY ARE YOU HITTING ME??
  • Lily: BECAUSE IT'S YOUR FAULT!
  • ***
  • Cedric: They did it. They got the cup.
  • Sirius: Lost the sword.
  • Albus: They did well. But now Tom Riddle will know what they are hunting.
  • James: He already knows. Now what?
  • Lily: To Hogwarts.
  • Dobby: Once again Harry Potter frees a poor and hurt creature. He is truly great.
  • Albus: You are correct Dobby. He really is.
  • ***
  • James: They're in trouble!
  • Sirius: They need to-
  • Albus: Brother.
  • ***
  • Lily: Your brother isn't being helpful.
  • Albus: He's worrying more about their safety than their success. He's a better man than I ever was.
  • ***
  • James: Oh...
  • Lily: Albus...oh Albus I'm so sorry.
  • Albus: I should introduce you to my family. They would like you. But that may have to wait. I believe we are about to go home.
  • ***
  • Alastor: The war came to Hogwarts.
  • Albus: And here it will end. Never tickle a sleeping dragon.
  • ***
  • James: Use them Harry. You need the help
  • ***
  • Sirius: Why would you step out from the cloak?
  • James: He can handle Alecto.
  • Lily: So can Luna.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh good. He's used Cruciatus.
  • James: Let's just hope he doesn't need to use the last one.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Oh great. This dick.
  • James: Oh man! Look at Minnie go! Kick his ass!
  • Lily: They're on the same side!
  • Sirius: So?
  • ***
  • Sirius: I wish I was there. One last battle.
  • James: Me too Padfoot.
  • Sirius: Although...maybe not at this very moment.
  • Lily: This is so awkward. Jeez Fleur, really?
  • ***
  • Lily: Aww they made up.
  • Alastor: Just in time to die.
  • James: Death did not make you any cheerier did it?
  • ***
  • Cedric: See I’m impressed by the visual. But the fact that it’s always Slytherin versus the other three, seems to highlight a major problem in this school.
  • Albus: I agree Mr Diggory. A simple idea that has such permanent consequences.
  • ***
  • James: In the middle of a battle and he forgets what he's doing.
  • Lily: Has your attention span.
  • James: Why is it that every bad thing comes from me?
  • ***
  • Albus: The Grey Lady. Harry you marvelous young man.
  • Dobby: Ghost Miss Ravenclaw has always been kind to me.
  • Albus: Ah of course! Before he met with me. In case I escorted him out.
  • James: But where did he hide it?
  • Albus: I do not know. But I believe Harry does.
  • ***
  • Lily: Even now he is loyal to you.
  • ***
  • Cedric: Chamber of Secrets? Hell of a romantic date Ron.
  • Albus: Aaahh of course. These children are magnificent.
  • ***
  • Lily: It’s about damn time!
  • James: They're really going at it.
  • Alastor: Timing. Idiots.
  • ***
  • James: Sirius is following Tonks. Cedric and Alastor have gone to see other people.
  • Lily: I guess it's just us then.
  • Albus: Fitting in a way.
  • Dobby: Yes sir.
  • Hedwig: Hoot.
  • ***
  • Lily: These three again?
  • James: When are old school enemies not welcome?
  • ***
  • James: He just tried to kill Hermione...
  • Lily: Were we like this?
  • James: Probably.
  • ***
  • James: Fucking fiendfyre! You crazy bastard!
  • ***
  • Lily: We would never have tried to save them.
  • James: Speak for yourself. I saved Snape remember.
  • Lily: Oh shut up. They destroyed another Horcrux
  • ***
  • James: Oh no...
  • Lily: Hello Fred.
  • Fred: Blimey. You're the Potters! Professor Dumbledore! Oh hell!
  • James: Yes Fred you are dead. But if it makes you feel better, you can call me Prongs.
  • Fred: But my pare- YOU'RE JOKING!
  • Sirius: No he's not. I'm Padfoot. And this is Moony, who literally can’t duel to save his life.
  • Remus: I’d say it's good to see you Fred bu...James? Lily?
  • James: It’s good to see you old friend.
  • ***
  • Remus: It’s been years.
  • Lily: For you. Where’s Tonks?
  • Remus: Dolohov killed her after he did me. When Padfoot collected us she went to see Teddy.
  • ***
  • James: Let's go end this.
  • ***
  • Fred: This is chaos.
  • Alastor: This is war!
  • Fred: Mad Eye! You’re al- oh yeah I'm dead.
  • Sirius: You get used to it.
  • ***
  • Sirius: Dammit Hagrid!
  • Remus: Wonderful. Giants.
  • ***
  • James: Focus Harry. You can do this.
  • Lily: Luna! Bless your soul.
  • ***
  • Remus: I'm not sure how I feel about Voldemort using this place.
  • ***
  • Lily: Oh God. Snape, run!
  • James: Too late.
  • Remus: What is he doing?
  • Albus: That's a memory.
  • Severus: Albus? Where are w- Lily??
  • Sirius: You sonofa-
  • James: Motherf-
  • Lily: QUIET! No one says a word until we see that memory.
  • Albus: If I may-
  • Lily: Not a word! You have both played with my sons life as if he were a piece in a game! No one has the right to talk until we see that memory!
  • ***
  • Lily: You bullied my son. And his friends. You went out of your way to torture and torment them. But you also risked your life for my son, every day for the last three years.I do not forgive you, but you can stay. For now.
  • Sirius: Wait what?
  • James: You heard her. But I swear, you pine after my wife even once and I'll punch you in the face.
  • Severus: I won't be here long. I want to see how it ends. After that, I will leave.
  • ***
  • Severus: It’s good to see you Lily.
  • Fred: He says after we just watched a montage based on sixteen years of his love for her.
  • Remus: Fred, shut up.
  • ***
  • Cedric: I thought you'd be more disturbed about Harry having to die.
  • Lily: I...
  • James: Don't think for a second that we aren’t being destroyed inside. But there is no choice. Our son has t-...
  • Lily: To defeat Voldemort, our son has to die. And we'll be here to greet him.
  • ***
  • James: He told Neville. About the snake.
  • Lily: Oh. It's Ginny.
  • ***
  • Sirius: The Snitch?
  • Albus: Excellent Harry. I imagine you four should get ready.
  • James: Ready for what?
  • ***
  • Cedric: The Stone! Harry was right!
  • Fred: What the hell is that thing?
  • Albus: Old and powerful magic.
  • ***
  • Lily: He dropped it!
  • James: Harry NO!
  • Lily: Wh-what just happened? Why did Voldemort fall?
  • Albus: EXCELLENT! HAHAHA! IT WORKED!
  • Severus: What did you do this time you mad old man?
  • Albus: My greatest work! My masterpiece! Engineered from beyond the grave!
  • Lily: Stop patting yourself on the back Dumbledore and tell me what happened to my son!!
  • Albus: Lily! James! Harry is alive! Now, let’s see if this works.
  • James: What? What are you muttering? What-WHERE DID HE GO?
  • ***(Due to Tumblr limits, the rest is under part 2)

anonymous asked:

Hi, ok, you are a treasure? Like, I've done nothing for weeks now but roll around your fic recs like a fat cat? And I am totally determined to read every single thing you rec even if it takes me years! I was wondering if you have some hurt!Draco/Harry having to take care of him recs? Preferably post war, but doesn't have to be, just lots of hurt/comfort? Please and THANK YOU, I ADORE YOU!

Hey anon! Thank you, I’m so glad you’re enjoying the recs!! This was a fascinating one, largely cause it made me realize I have way more fics where they help each other or they’re both messes or where Draco helps Harry than where Harry helps Draco. But that’s all relative - I still have quite a few good ones for you! These are all fics where Draco is hurt in some way (physical illness, mental illness, trauma, injury, imprisonment) and Harry takes care of him in some way. Given the nature of the thing, def recommend reading tags and warnings. Hope you enjoy! And as always, remember to leave kudos and comments for the authors!

Hurt!Draco Hurt/Comfort Recs

As Souls From Bodies Steal by femmequixotic - NC-17, 41.5k - Hope may be found in the oddest of places, even in the bleakness of winter.

Beggars Would Ride by eidheann_writes - NC-17, 37.5k - Harry finds his comfortable life taking a turn he never expected when he becomes the father of Draco Malfoy’s child

Let’s Pretend the War is Over by pir8fancier- PG-13, 8k - The war is over and Draco is alone, fighting demons of a different nature.

Midnights at the Manor by emansil_12 - R, 14k - Draco’s current life is not at all what he would have expected it to be. His mother’s illness and his father’s own devastating problem, filled Draco’s days with worry and anxiety. It was Harry Potter’s presence at the manor during the midnight hours that made all the difference.

No Quiet Find by distempered/blithelybonny - NC-17, 10k -War makes a man tired…some more than most. Draco needs rest.

On One’s Knees by pir8fancier - R, 34k - he war is over and to the victors go the spoils. Five years after the final battle at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy has been paroled from Azkaban and works nights as a janitor at The Daily Prophet. Harry Potter, recently married to

One Thousand Bars by lumosed_quill - NC-17, 19k - And I will hold on hope / And I won’t let you choke / On the noose around your neck / And I’ll find strength in pain / And I will change my ways / I’ll know my name as it’s called again

Purple Secret by Vaysh - NC-17, 11k - “Did I care that he was a vampire? Not in the least. I was curious; I had never slept with a vampire before. All those fabled sensual pleasures – the thrill of the bite, the erotic sucking of the neck (and I imagined, other body parts) – I was going to experience them. It helped that I have a thing for blood. It helped that Jonathan has a delicious arse.”

Shine, Even in Darkness by raitala - NC-17, 41k - Harry hasn’t seen Draco for over fifteen years, but now he’s showing up everywhere and Harry is sort of weirdly attracted to him, but that can’t be right?

Sleeping Dragon by Omi_Ohmy - NC-17, 20.5k - When Draco loses his memory, Harry struggles to recognise the man he loves. As they get to know each other again, can Harry overcome his sense of loss? And will Draco ever remember that he loves Harry?

Touched by writcraft - R, 7.5k - On the insistence of his parents, Draco begins to see a therapist to discuss his difficulties with physical intimacy. When he changes his appointment time, Draco discovers he’s not the only one seeking assistance as a result of events which occurred during the war and he finds comfort in the most unexpected of places.

Vale Sanare by RurouniHimi - R, 23.5k - Draco’s world gains a new component, just when he thought he’d sorted everything out.

Darcy/Steve Elementary Teacher AU.

“Miss Lewis! Miss Lewis! You won’t believe what Mr. Rogers drew today!”

Darcy couldn’t help but chuckle as she peered into the ajar door to pick up her first grade class from the art room. Her students always came back to her class with the brightest of smiles on their faces, all due to one Steve Rogers- art teacher extraordinaire who was adored by kids and adults alike.

At the sound of Sadie’s exclamation, Mr. Rogers, Steve, snaps his head up from helping Billy draw a flower and gives Darcy a bright smile that makes her stomach flip. “Oh hey, Darcy!”

Clapping his hands, Steve announces to the kids that class is over, and is met with a flurry of children who excitedly show him their finished artwork. Darcy’s stomach flips again over the sight of him complimenting her students, and knowing the type of person Steve is, actually meaning every word he says.

“Hey, Steve! They didn’t give you too much trouble today, did they?” Darcy asks as she moves further into the room.

“Your kids? Never. Although there was a moment when…” He trails off with a wink in her direction, and is met with mock gasps of indignation. “Mr. Rogers, we were good today! Tell her!” He laughs and tells him to start cleaning up their stations so they can go back to class.

She starts to makes her way around the room, helping to gather art supplies and place them back in their proper places, and can’t keep herself from glancing over as he reaches to put bottles of paint away on the top shelf.

If Darcy was being honest with herself, or at least two glasses of wine in, she would admit that in addition to being a good man he’s also the sexiest one that she’s ever seen. But she is stone cold sober, and is not dwelling on those thoughts in the middle of a school day. Absolutely not. She’s not thinking about how he has a body of an Adonis, how the light blue button down shirt that brings out his impossibly blue eyes stretches across the most ridiculous torso she’s ever seen. (Thank god he volunteered to help chaperone the trip to the community swimming pool last year, because shirtless Steve Rogers was a thing of pure beauty.)

But she digresses. She’s kept herself from acting on this crush up until now, and she’s not going to ruin their friendship.

She can’t. She won’t.

Positive opinions of the signs / Based off people I know
  • Aries: You're so lovable wtf I've never actually seen you mad but every Aries I've met is hilarious
  • Taurus: Literally every time any Taurus talks I get so happy they're so cute and FUNNY LITERALLY THE FUNNIEST FRIEND I HAVE IS A TAURUS and y'all just get me ok
  • Gemini: I have a crush on this Gemini and she's literally the stereotypical Gemini but also you guys always make me laugh and you get me as well just in different ways. Really smart though and you use your intelligence to make people laugh
  • Cancer: really open minded also super protective I love that about you I never have to fight my own battles but sometimes I wish you would let me because you tend to take the heat for me and then you end up sad :( but I think it makes you happy when everyone around you is happy so I love u okay
  • Leo: My ex is a Leo and we don't get along she's very opinionated but also very protective and I like that. I like how cuddly and cute she is.
  • Virgo: My mom and best friend is a Virgo and honestly you guys are intelligent and hardworking and I can always make you laugh I love life stop worrying so much and thank you for being great listeners ok
  • Libra: my ex is a libra and I miss her she was a great friend and literally the most adorable person I've ever met oh my god she stood up for me once and it was so cute she didn't even know how to drag ppl she tried tho
  • Scorpio: BFF is Scorpio she's really weird in a good way and not as sexual as ppl always assume. She's always willing to do anything and she'll pay for you if need be
  • Sagittarius: EX IS ALSO A SAG I have lots of exes lol but she's so!!!! adaptable!!!!! If she sees you use a phrase she'll start using it around you as well and she can just adapt to any type of person and be their best friend I love it!!!'n (it makes me really jealous)ILOVE IT SO MUCH!!!'
  • Capricorn: listen I don't like the majority of u but I have good things to say okay first I hate this about you but I also wish I had that quality but u can drag someone so fucking EASILY like u wanna fight ok let's go also ur not as goody goody as everyone seems to think you would fight someone in 2 seconds for no reason and u have a huge ego man stay u
  • Aquarius: my sister is an Aquarius and I'm Aqua Dom and we get along so well we're like bffs but she's obsessed with leggings and she's so hardworking she never had a good parent figure around but she's done everything by herself so well and she's so successful So I applaud her also she's not afraid to do anything honestly
  • Pisces: no Pisces I've met has been your stereotypical adorable Pisces like yes they are adorable but not so much "awww look at that lost puppy it's so cute" but more like "aww look at that cute little kitten" that will grow into a cat and attack u if u piss it off okay but I wish I was friends with this Pisces girl but she's been INFECTED BY THE TWOFACED GEMINI BITCH I HATE so I can't trust her sad.
10

Sam’s top 7 10 anime of 2014! (2013 post here)

                  Comments in the captions :)

  • Noragami
  • Tokyo ESP
  • Barakamon
  • Haikyuu!!
  • Bakumatsu Rock
  • Kill La Kill 
  • Parasyte - The maxim 
  • Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun
  • Fate/stay night; Unlimited blade works
  • Aldnoah Zero

Runners up;
Tokyo Ghoul (its like shinji ate kaworu and became the ultimate animu weeb zombie, i went on to read a bunch of the manga but stopped because what the actual fuck kaneki-kun) 
Buddy Complex (because they were clearly banging eachother to gain superpowers in their mecha bro-bot brainlink thing ok)
Love stage (which was ok up til creepy sexual assault then no ty. gross.)
Mekakucity Actors (idk what was really going on but it was cool all the same).  
Doten Ni Warau (adorable nii-san anime with delicious protag costume designs)

Danny Castellano is My Whole Damn World

Wait, no, that wasn’t the name of the episode was it…?

Hmm. Well, it might as well have been because…look if I need to explain why then you clearly haven’t watched it. So go watch it, flail about a bit, die from squealing too much, resurrect yourself, drink some water (you’re probably dehydrated from all the drooling over Messina hng) and then read this. Ok? Alright then.

Also, most of this is either me swooning over Danny/Chris or flailing over Dandy sooooo….be warned!

Oh and about half way through I started calling everyone assholes so there’s that too. I think I still have too many feels or something. I can’t cope.

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