but they felt right in the way they sounded idk

There’s a place between seeing and dreaming, a boundary in reality where longing and wanting swim inside eyes.
And it’s a trick of the light, a slowed heart that projects things on a lazy gaze.
You come like the sun at the end of may, fleeting but warm and trying,
trying so intensely hard to just shine. Your edges are blurred despite how solid you seem, I’ve never met someone so real, and maybe it’s the tint of sunglasses or maybe just because you’re made of nothing but softness.
The thing is, you’re too good for a life like this, I know you’ll end up tearing me apart.
I’ve always been drawn to self destruction,
this might be the most fatal yet.
It goes like this,
you appear within me even when you’re not there beside me, appear with a smile that has my heart pounding out a beat to the soundtrack of your laugh that sets the wind on fire.
There’s something wrong about being addicted to a pair of eyes.
I’m not supposed to be able to see a past I should remember but don’t, I’m not supposed to see a soul dancing in colours, I’m not supposed to see home.
And when I’ve conjured you up again in the darkness from words sent on a lit screen, you ask me questions I can’t answer.

What would sirens sing to you?

There’s only one answer.

A composition made of your eyes and your smile, the bridge of a requiem played by strings set on laughter. The sunlight filtering through frozen parts of things kept locked away.
The way your voice sounds when you say my name.

Cuddling with Winwin
  • adfg my first request for a memebr of the china line
  • i’m so excited for doing this, i love this baby so muchhh
  • he’s just so adorable and innocent and he’s so clueless all the time
  • is imposible not to love him am i right or what
  • shoutout to anon for requesting this!!!
  • also, give this cutie lots of love dO YOU HEAR ME
  • tbh, i don’t see sicheng being a clingy person
  • maybe sometimes he would do cute things for you like playing with your hair or back hugging you maybe
  • but normally, you’re always the one who starts the skinship
  • and when you do it’s not even something crazy 
  • is just simple little things like honding his pinky
  • or maybe give him a little kiss in his cheek
  • but even innocents things like that gets him SO flustered
  • but, going to the story, you guys were alone in the dorms that day and the rest of the members wouldn’t comeback until some hours
  • and since the moment were taeyong said that he was doing nothing but thinking about cuddling you
  • there are times when the only thing he has in his mind is wanting to hold you and kiss you and repeting you for hours how much he loves you
  • bUT HE’S TOO SHY TO DO SO
  • he just can’t do it and he feels so upset and disappointed in himself
  • don’t get him wrong, though
  • he’s so deeply in love with you, he would do ANYTHING for you
  • the problem is just that he doesn’t know how to show it to you
  • but you noticed that every time he feels like this the way he acts is really different so it’s easy to tell
  • he gets really silent and tries to avoid your gaze at all costs and he keeps playing with his fingers
  • he just really wants to cuddle but the words won’t go out of his throat and it killing him
  • so you have to do the first move before he explodes of something lmao
  • “sicheng? since we have the dorms for ourselves what if we watch this movie that i just found in netflix, uh?”
  • “ah, s-sure thing baobei”
  • also he’s scared of having awkward moments with you while cuddling
  • this sounds a bit weird?? but like
  • he just would never be able to forgive himself if he makes his own partner feel uncomfortable while doing something that both of you are supose to enjoy
  • and of course you noticed this
  • so, when you cuddle, you do it while watching a movie or before sleep
  • and in that way y’all avoid any awkward moments because you’ll be busy watching the movie or really sleepy
  • and he’s so grateful towards you for being so compressive, you have no idea
  • and while cuddling it’s always the spoon, always, it’s the most convenient one for y’all
  • for you because you’re always the little spoon, so you get him to backhug you and sometime to recive some kisses
  • and also is convenient for him bc you can’t see his blushy face and smiley face
  • so there you were
  • sicheng’s arms were around your waist, with his hand under your t-shirt, exploring your skin, his touches were making you feel more and more sleepy
  • and do you remember that i told you about cuddling before sleeping?
  • that’s the moment when he opens up the most to you
  • when he heared you yawing he smiled and putted you closer to his body
  • he even dare to leave a few kisses in your jawline and neck, making your heart race
  • “i-i really love you, y/n, really”
  • “i love you too, sicheng”
  • he would never get tired of hearing that words coming from you
  • you were able to make him feel so weak with simplest things
  • while you are sleeping he always gets really sincere with his feelings
  • asking to an sleepy you to forgive him for things he can’t control
  • “i’m so sorry for being like this, baobei, you deserve so much better, and i promise you that i’m trying my best, y/n”
  • my heart is broken why is this suddenly so angsty
  • little he didn’t know that you weren’t asleep yet
  • hehehe >:)
  • “i know you are, baby and i really appreciate it”
  • you turned around to see his face but even before you could even blink he was already kissing you
  • his soft lips felt like heaven and he never stopped touching you in that dedicated way that always drove you crazy
  • you snuggled up in his chest, the sound of his heart calming you
  • “sleep with me a little, baby”
  • you could tell that he was smiling without even looking at him
  • “sure, baobei, the movie you choosed was so boring that i was going to fell asleep anyways”
  • “ugh, shut up sicheng, you know that i choosed it randomly”
  • he giggled at how adorable you looked while being angry
  • “you’re an angel, right? you’re just too good to be real”
  • ok, so i’m gonna finish it here bc idk if this is what y’all expected??
  • like wHY IS THIS SO SAD AND SERIOUS, THIS SHOULD BE FLUFFY AND CUTE
  • but, anyways, i hope yall enjoyed it anyways lmao <3

Sometimes I’m just like?????????? My mouth just lies there agape, because I’m honestly so fascinated with ‘This Love,’ and all of the little production details that make me think that I’m slightly going insane, because no one else notices them. BUT IT’S GENUINELY THE MOST LOVELY, HEARTBREAKING SONG ON ‘1989.’ IT JUST GIVES ME CHILLS. Like, as the song goes on, and the production changes (as a person does after a relationship), you begin to have this underlying feeling in you. You sense the beat picking up which naturally makes you think happy thoughts, but then you have Taylor just echoing her ballads of a love lost, yet it’s coming back when she least expected it. If you took the production and related it back to a real world perspective, it’d be as if her life was getting brighter all around her but there was a missing piece. Something kept pulling her back away from the shoreline into danger, almost like the clockwork of tides (heh, I know she uses this metaphor). Maybe I’m just thinking way too much into it. It’s been over a year, since it’s release and I overthink lyrics way too often, but lately productions of songs, especially on ‘1989,’ have portrayed the feeling of the album way differently then what I initially felt listening to it. Idk…..but yeah…

hi hehe can you write an angst scenario whereby youre in a relationship with bobby but you found out that he used you to make good lyrics based on your experience with him and you felt sad and had a huge arguement with him ? thank youuuuuu ! ^-^

You take a seat not so far from the shop’s entrance. Your boyfriend planned a short date with you at the coffee shop where you two first met. It was just a simple ‘hello’ that led to a hundreds of happy but sometimes sad days. You smile with excitement at your cup of hot chocolate, waiting for your boyfriend that was late, just like usually.

“Isn’t that Bobby’s girlfriend?” You hear a whisper coming from a few tables away.

You glance around the room, searching for the owner of the voice. There wasn’t a lot of people, probably eight or nine. Some were sitting alone while others were with their friends or their date.

“It is! It is! Ah, how can she look so nice yet be so mean to our Jiwonnie?” A girl mumbled as she glared at you.

Some fans always tell a bunch of nonsense, you didn’t know what they were talking about. Even if you tried to ignore it, your ears would only listen to their conversation.

“She’s so lucky to be with him… I’m so jealous, let’s be honest, I would never yell at him, he’s too cute for that.”

“Right? She’s such a rude wench, why aren’t they breaking up yet? Unless they’re already over? Is that why she’s here? She’s probably meeting another dude, she’s so disrespectful. I wonder if she really slapped him, she was probably on drugs or she’s always crazy." 

Holding yourself together, you remain calm, trying to not interrupt their discussion that you shouldn’t be eavesdropping. Keeping your eyes on the smoke that would come out of the cup, you felt your body shake, your eyes watering themselves with your incoming tears.

You never actually got insulted that way. Talking on your back and hearing it wasn’t a way to know how people hated you, you preferred reading his fans talk shit on you on the Internet more than hearing them in real life since you can’t log out. You wanted to leave the café but either way, their voices would still run through your mind.

"Eh? Is my girlfriend crying?” You hear your boyfriend asks.

You look up. “Oh! When did you get here?" 

"A few seconds ago. Why are you crying?”

 You let out a faint giggle. “It’s nothing, just the smoke of my hot chocolate made me cry.”

You didn’t get a date properly, not with the amount of people gathering around you two as some of them sent him sweet smiles while they gave you death glares. You wanted to rush home and cry in your room but then again, you wanted to throw yourself in his arms but you knew that some people in the audience would get angry at you. 

You finally got back to your dorm that you shared with a friend. After all, you were still in college, not like you could afford an apartment or anything for you two to live together. He walked in the dorm with you, taking his boots off before walking around. 

“Why are you feeling so down today?” Your boyfriend wonders, walking towards you to give you a hug. 

“Can you explain to me what you tell the media about us?” You felt your tears coming back.

“I’ve barely been in any interviews lately, I’m not part of any show either. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

You didn’t feel like talking about anything anymore with him. He would probably lie to you about it or he said something about your relationship. Opening your laptop and going on the Internet, you look up his name and yours, trying to find out what those girls were talking about earlier.

[Song Analysis]
omg guys I listened to Bobby’s song and idk if it’s just me but is he referring to his relationship with ________? lemme tell you why

the way you scream as your tears roll down
the pain i caused you when i wasn’t around
those hurtful words i knew i couldn’t erase
i’m telling you you’re the only one that exists

express yourself in a different way
i can’t listen to you all day

the sound of the slap that landed on my face
that day i just wanted to hold you in my embrace
but it felt like it wasn’t the right place

you make my heart beat faster
it feels like you’re my master
i can’t refuse what you say
because if i do you won’t stay

is she like hitting him or smthing?? _________ is probably really rude bobby would never tell bad things about her like this! she can’t even be happy with what she has wth -.- i hate her so much

You remembered the day you slapped him. It was a big and hard day for you, you had three projects and an exam due for the next day and stress was running around you, you felt yourself get angry and tense up. It was the first time you weren’t grateful to see your boyfriend come to your dorm. 

You were sad when he wasn’t with you and that day, you were reading a story about relationships and you started to deepen yourself in it, thinking he was cheating on you and whatnot. It was stupid argument after all, yet he made a song about it and now everyone sees you a different way.

“________…”

You silently cried as you tried to wipe your tears away, not wanting him to see you in that state. You hurried up and pulled out a bunch of tissues before being able to face him. When you turned around to look at him, he stared at you confusedly.

“Why are you crying?" 

"It’s nothing…” You lied as your lips shaked at your smile.

He moves his eyes to your screen, reading the words that were shown on it. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You begin, trying to stay calm.

“_________─”

“I apologized after, I know it took me two days to apologize, but I did it. You still wrote a song about it? I know apologizing isn’t enough but…. doing this? To humiliate me? To make me feel guilty? What did you try to make me feel? What kind of revenge did you want?" 

"No, __________, this isn’t it, my point is─”

“To make me feel weak? You want to be my master? Fine, do it. Order me around. Slap me in the face if you want to. I don’t remember when I was being so strict towards you to tell you to do things like I was your master but go on, use me. Use me like you did with your lyrics, use me like I used you.”

“Oh my god, __________, let me speak!” He shouts, making you tremble as tears ran faster.“I’m sorry, okay? For making a song based on how we live our life together like this. I know saying 'sorry’ isn’t enough but… It was two months ago, can’t we forget about this?”

“Are you crazy? Forget about this? When the whole world thinks that I treat you like a slave everyday, seeing me as a bad image, as a bad person, you think I can forget about this? If everyone forgets about this then I can too. But everyone knows and remembers this, no matter what.”

“What can I do to make it up to you?” He sighs, frustrated.

“What you can do? I’ll tell you what you can do. Break up. Let’s break up. Let’s cut ties, let’s end everything here." 

He wasn’t just angry but sadness was added to his current feelings. He never wanted to hear you say anything like that to him and you did, he knew it was a huge mistake.

"Do you still love me?” He asks with a shaky voice.

“A relationship needs to have two person that loves each other. I should be the one asking you that question." 

I want to scream
until my lungs ache for air
like they did when you left me
I want to feel something again
because sitting here, not feeling anything at all,
is like I’m engulfed in smoke that leaves me feeling numb
I want to scream
until I can’t remember what it feels like to feel nothing at all
I want pain to replace this emptiness
because at least the pain will remind me of you
because right now I can’t even recall what it felt like to have you wrapped in my arms, or the way your voice sounds when you are anxious
but oh my god anything has to be better than this
—  I feel so lost: Carol Shlyakhova(strong-but-breakable)
Not Ready to Make Nice Chpt.1- Cameron Dallas Imagine

Okay guys, this is the first Chapter, I hope you enjoy it. I need some serious feedback on this one, because Idk if its good enough to continue! Love you all!

            Cameron rolled over you and you felt a bubble of laughter rumble from his chest and touch your cheek, “Y/NNNNN,”

            You ignored the way butterflies pricked your stomach at the sound of his heavy voice dragging out your name, you were mad at him and it was going to stay that way. You turned around and dug your face into a pillow, he didn’t deserve your attention right now, he was laughing at you which made you feel stupid.

            “Baby,” He whispered, his breath hitting the back of your neck. “Don’t be mad, baby,”

            Don’t be mad? Go fuck yourself, Dallas. You thought, but before it could leave your lips, you felt Cameron shift his weight above you. His hands stretched out beside your head, his hips moving slightly against your bum, his knees separating yours.

            Cameron moved the hair, that covered your face, and brushed his lips against your cheek. “You can ignore me all you want, Y/N, but you can’t do it forever, baby.” He whispered before giving your cheek a kiss and continuing his way down the back of your neck.

            You felt your body tense up as his cold fingers brought your t-shirt up slightly so he could kiss your spine, he knew exactly how to get the anger to slip away. His big hands traveled over the black cloth, of yoga shorts, that covered your ass. “I’ve always loved this ass,” Cameron said huskily behind you, when his thoughts got dirty it meant that his voice got deeper and his eyes darkened with lust. One of your favorite things about him.

            He gave your ass a squeeze and was just about to pull your shorts, and thong down, when your phone buzzed next to the bed on your dresser. You heard the sound of him undoing his zipper, while he kissed the dimple right above your ass, “Don’t even think about getting it,”

            Despite the growing feeling of horiness, that was going against the wanting to know who the text was from, it didn’t overpower it. You sighed and reached for your phone and grabbed it, Cameron huffed as he laid his body on top of yours, his erection pressing against your butt cheeks. “It could be important,” You whispered, blinking away the haziness that came with nearly having sex with Cameron.

            “I can’t believe you’re going to look at that right as I was about to get it on with you,” Cameron mumbled into your shoulder as you grabbed your phone and went to the tweet that was sent to you.

            “Keep in mind, you did just tell me that I looked fat in my shorts,” You reminded him.

            “What?” Cameron yelped. “I told you that your legs looked thick, but you turned away before I could tell you that your thick legs are one of the sexiest things about you.”

            “Hmmm.” You mumbled, not answering him as you glanced at the message from yet another fan of Cameron’s. Sometimes they told you how cute you and Cameron were, some said how you didn’t deserve him, but this one told you that she gives your relationship a month and to go die. You stared at the screen, not knowing what to say. You could handle hate, but not when they put dying and your relationship with Cameron together.

            Cameron read the text over your shoulder and tensed behind you. He kissed your shoulder sweetly before saying, “Don’t listen to them, baby, I love you to the moon and back.”

            You didn’t say anything back to him, and he took that as a bad sign. He took your phone from your fingers and shut it off, placing it back on the stand before pulling you to him and making you face him. “You are the best thing that ever happened to me, baby. You need to believe that,”

            When you moved your eyes down he moved your chin back up, his eyes were soft and loving, and every bit concerned. “Tell me you love me,”

            “I love you,” You mumbled on a sigh.

            “No, tell me you love me,”

            You knew exactly what he wanted you to say, but your sad thoughts were holding you back from saying it. He kissed your nose and your heart warmed as the gesture. You smiled slightly and felt the words flow from your lips before you could even stop them, “I love you to infinity and beyond.”

that’s just gonna be a rant about my harry potter life

this year i’ve started reading harry potter, i’ve always been a part in other fandoms but nothing i’ve expirienced was quiet like that. I can’t even explain what it means to me, i just love it so much but i feel like i’m left alone cause i came so late. all of my friends read it when they were little and kinda past this stage in their life but honestly i don’t think it’s a phase. anyway, most of them are okay with me fangirling and stuff but i feel they don’t understand how much i’d wish them to feel the same and kinde guide me into the fandom idk.. 

also they’re all sure in 100% that sirius and remus was never a thing and that they were straight and i really ship wolfstar so i have no one to actually talk to and it’s not even like they’re don’t see it but they’re okay with that they’re kinda anti and idk it makes me feel super lonely..

in some way i’m happy i read it right now when i’m 16 years old and i could understand it better but i feel almost even more left out than i felt before i even read it. please tell me i don’t sound totally crazy. 

also i’m really scared to read the cursed child because i’m scared of life after i 100% finish harry potter, and most of you already expirienced years of it but i havn’t and i really don’t know what i would do


please feel free to contect me if you want to talk about hp or wolfstar or anything actually