but thank gods for rocket launchers

FAKE AH CREW AU IDEA

–submitted by theload

Ryan and The Vagabond are two different people, and twin brothers.

Ryan is just a normal guy trying to make his way in the city. He’s a tech nerd and completely unassuming. He’s about as threatening as a lost kitten.

His brother, known throughout the city as The Vagabond and The Mad Mercenary, couldn’t be anymore different than his brother. He’s Ramsey’s attack dog and enjoys fires, explosions, and torture. He’s also fiercely protective of his twin, which is why no one knows Ryan exists.


This is an amazing idea, oh my god.

Now I just want the Vagabond to be out of of town on a job or something, and the Fake AH Crew come across Lost Kitten Ryan (as he will forever be referred to in my mind, thank you very much) and they’re all just ‘oh man, you’re back early!  That’s awesome, get in dude we’re heisting.’

And since the FAHC aren’t the sort to lose time talking things out, Ryan gets whisked away on their latest job, more than a little freaked out because he’s suddenly surrounded by men and women in masks with guns, and they are most certainly not obeying basic traffic laws, not one of them is wearing a seatbelt, and oh god is that a rocket launcher?

They reach the target and they all pile out and next thing Ryan knows he’s standing in front of a flaming building wearing a mask and holding a rocket launcher (and goddamn those things are heavier than they look), and this guy in a suit is asking him if he’d like to ‘do the honours’, and this curly haired guy in glasses is pouting at him like he’d just stolen his last cookie.

Ryan just looks at them, then at the building, and then at the very deadly weapon that he’s pretty sure he should have a permit of some sort just to be allowed to breathe on, and promptly freaks the fuck out.

“Who the fuck are you?  What the fuck is going on?  Is this a kidnapping?  Did I just get kidnapped?  And would somebody please take this stupid thing from me before I drop it and blow myself the fuck up?”

The rest of the crew stare at him for a second before Mother Hen Mode activates, because jesus, did he get some sort of head injury or something?  He really has no idea who we are, what the fuck?  And now they have to figure out how to deal with a freaked out and scared Ryan, which quite honestly they didn’t even know was possible.