Ok, so, i have a lot of problems with the “sixpenceee heals” shit and im gunna try and write it all down. this is gunna be a long post so heads up.
1) its called sixpenceee heals. This gives the impression that she is going to fix EVERYTHING. She is not going to just help you, but she is going to fix all of your problems too. That is a horrible mindset. People already have an expectation that she would never be able to live up to. If that post really happened to take off, she would cause a lot of harm to a very large amount of people.
The ‘heals’ also gave me the impression that was trying to heal past damage done to those with a mental illness. Like she wanted to make it ok that she was exploiting mentally ill people, only this time we pay her to do it
2) the number of people she said she was going to help. She said 10 auto 15 (originally I stated 15 to 30, and now I have been corrected). She fully expects to be able to take on all of these peoples life problems and give them detailed answers. She has no grasp on the emotional energy that can be needed to help people who are in as low as a place as she was aiming for. She has no idea what she was undertaking. My own therapist, WHO IS TRAINED TO DO THAT EXACT THING, has told me that there are days where she did not have the emotional energy needed to help people. that was that woman’s JOB. how are we supposed to expect a collage student to be able to do the same thing?
3) she was doing it out of compassion and empathy. Then she turns around and charges $30 for it. This is exploitive. there is no way around it. You do not care about those people’s problems because you care, you care about them because you are getting money.
4) the thing that pisses me off the most has to be that if i didn’t know any better, i would have done it. I used to be a HUGE fan of hers. I didnt know any better. I LOVED her blog. At the time, i was literally preparing to try and off myself. If this came out then, i would have payed her. I would have expected her to ‘heal’ me, and me to get better. She would have gotten people like that, i know there are more people like that out there. That pisses me off the most.
Now for her apology.
She calls herself naive and i’m glad she does. But that is about the only thing that she actually does that i agree with.
The rest of her apology is as follows:
“I know it won’t make up for what came across as exploitive and greedy, but what matters to me is that those that need help can come and seek it.
If you have more resources I can add to this list let me know!”
She does not actually apologise, she apologises for how she came across. That is not an apology. that is throwing the blame for this whole situation on people like me who were trying to stop others from being exploited by her.
A bit before this was ‘resources’ that can be found through a quick google search. This shows that she did not actually do any in depth resource for ‘resources’. The ones she listed are helpful sure, but they are all the same thing being repeated. An actual mental health professional, or anyone with a background in mental health issues, would have added links to coping mechanisms, possibly dbt exercises, and distractions. That told me how little she actually knew.
Finally was the fact that she reblogged and posted a couple passive aggressive things on what is going on. She doesn’t care about who she hurt, or who she could have possibly hurt. She just apologised to save face. She doesn’t mean it, and yet she feels that we owe her our forgiveness.
Overall, this whole situation was horribly shitty. The best thing now would probably be for @sixpenceee to step back from their blog and ACTUALLY reflect on the criticism that she has received over the years.
If i missed anything, or you wanna add your own thoughts on the situation feel free.
It always sucks when you aren’t sure if you were manipulated or not and you like… constantly doubt yourself and you ask several people just to be sure and they all go “yes you absolutely were” and you’re just like “Oh”.
Realizing that you weren’t just overreacting just leaves you feeling so. Empty.
So uh,,, is there a taboo in ferengi society about wearing earrings, what with the ears being something of an erogenous zone? I’m racking my brain trying to think of any canon source but the only one i can think of is Ishka, and she is way too cool for social norms so that doesn’t help
Motive for this question: wanna draw quark in fancy outfit w/ earrings but i want to go in armed with the knowledge of whether or not im drawing him with the ferengi equivalent of a nipple piercing
The SKAM fandom, throughout the hiatus, waiting for season 4: we know we’re probably asking too much and we don’t wanna push it on isak because he has to take all the time he needs but can he please be confident enough to hold hands with Even at school?
when he tells u he was a circus tiger named matthew in his past life and he was mistreated by clowns and he died in a cage at 14 years old and at first u thought he was kidding but then u realise he genuinely believes it moodboard
i see the word manipulation get thrown around a lot in the bpd community and while thats understandable i just wanted to give you all a small reminder
things that ARE manipulation are things like
never accepting responsibility for hurting others
guilt tripping others to get what you want
harassing others for not agreeing with you
intentionally diminishing other’s problems/difficulties by comparing them to your own
using other’s insecurities against them
things that are NOT manipulation include
expressing negative emotions to someone when you are hurt or distressed
not expressing emotions for the fear of bothering others
disagreeing with others and explaining your side of things
expressing your needs to those close to you
not socializing due to lack of energy or spoons
unhealthy behaviors (such as bottling things up, ignoring your problems, etc) definitely make situations harder and are things that need to be worked on asap, but unhealthy behaviors are not automatically manipulative just because someone has bpd
throwing around the wrong words can be extremely counter productive in this community, especially when there is already so much stigma and misunderstanding surrounding this disorder (not to mention that carelessly calling people manipulative and/or abusive for small things can end up devaluing what abuse and manipulation really mean)
TL;DR: do your research and get to know the actual meaning of strong words before using them
- words like ‘manipulation’ or ‘abuse’ are not for you to take lightly and use against people you just disagree or have a problem with