but still nice dude

dex has red hair

i have red hair too, which is pretty awesome. and also horrible, sometimes, because being ginger affects so much more than the just the pigment of your hair. so anyways here are some facts about dex and his hair bc i can relate:

  • he’s so pale
    • he’s so pale
    • even when he kind of manages to get a little darker after a sunburn fades, he’s still paler than everyone else’s normal skin tone
  • he does not tan. ever.
    • yeah sure, he may work on a lobster boat all summer, but buddy, i promise you, he’s not gonna come out of it looking nice and bronze
      • (why do people write fics where he comes back from the summer with a killer tan??? no bro, he probably just looks like a lobster. it sucks)
    • his skin just slowly gets pinker until he has a terrible sunburn, and then sometimes if he’s lucky it will turn out a little tanner when it fades
    • he probably uses at least spf 50, lbr here
      • actually, nah probably higher than that if we’re being honest
      • and he has to apply it like every hour
    • ugh and oh my god, he probably gets splotchy sunburns!!!
      • SPLOTCHY SUNBURNS ARE THE WORST
      • basically you think you’ve put sunscreen everywhere and spread it evenly but NOPE
      • random blotches of your skin will just be bright red while the rest is ridiculously pale and you look like you have some sort of disease-ridden rash
      • it has probably happened on his face and it’s the saddest thing
  • he has freckles for dayssssss (especially after the summer because they come back in full force during that season)
    • freckles everywhere
    • in the most random places
    • some are on his lips and on the back of his knees and his elbows and just very odd places
    • its a never ending cycle of freckles fading while new freckles form
    • he kind of gets a tan through his freckles??? 
      • bc he has so many and as they fade they kind of blotch together and make him look tan, but when you look really close you’re just like, oh, those are just tiny dots bunched together, not the actual pigmentation of your skin
    • he has. SO MANY. freckles on his shoulders
      • if you are of the male specimen, you probably go out shirtless in the summertime, and the sun hits you really hard on your shoulders, and thus, so. many. freckles. there.
      • (this is literally the most prominent place of freckles for redhead boys. please ask my brother and all of my cousins)
  • “does the carpet match the drapes?” ;)
    • why do people ask this
    • he gets this all the time, and it’s not just from people hitting on him
      • PEOPLE JUST GENUINELY WANT TO KNOW FOR SOME REASON???
    • and it’s super awkward
    • especially when they don’t match. bc um. a lot of times they don’t. just so you know.
    • “haha, firecrotch, huh?”
      • will wouldn’t find this funny even if it were accurate
  • back to the sunburn thing, it’s nice in the winter when he doesn’t get fried!! JUST KIDDING BC BLUSHING IS A THING
    • yeah anytime he gets remotely embarrassed or flustered, his face is the color of a tomato okay
    • even if he’s not actually uncomfortable, it still happens
      • “dex, nice shirt, man.” ➝ red face
      • “dude, nice assist!”➝ red face
      • *accidentally bumps into someone* ➝ red face
    • anytime nursey says anything ever, his face is red. i promise you this. i know this to be true
  • HE NEVER WEARS RED
    • or pink or orange, for that matter
    • (but i mean he goes to samwell so the red thing is kind of hard)
    • he unintentionally gravitates towards green and blue clothing bc his mom probably accidentally instilled in him that they compliment his hair as a child
      • this is so real. this is the realest, most relatable thing
    • going to samwell was probably super weird bc he had to start buying spirit wear and stuff and when he did, he realized he didn’t own any other red clothing
  • people always make irish jokes or assume he is irish, especially around st. patricks day
    • dex has no idea if he is irish
  • people always ask if another redhead they know is related to him
    • no
  • he has heard every “ginger” joke under the sun
    • no one has ever actually bullied him for it
    • but everyone makes the same jokes
    • will basically mouths the words as people say them bc he knows them so well at this point
    • he’s not actually bothered or offended, it’s just like… dude. he’s heard this before. you’re not being original
      • it’s very boring and a little irritating
    • but if he gets annoyed or doesn’t laugh people think he is a bad sport, so!!! he laughs them off even though he’s very disinterested and wants to tell them to maybe get some new material so they can actually say something remotely humorous next time
    • and he totally knows its not a big deal at all, bc some people have to deal with racist or homophobic jokes, and this doesn’t remotely compare. it’s just… very eye-roll inducing.
  • he gets horrible bruises for the stupidest shit, and sometimes just randomly and he’s not sure where they came from, bc ya gotta love that sensitive skin!!
  • oh and back to the ginger jokes thing, someone always makes a comment about that redhead temper!!
    • which is kind of unfortunate, bc dex kind of does have some temper issues
    • those jokes do not make him less angry either
      • (dex, seriously man. just chill for a sec)

wow this got really long and i could go on forever and ever but yeah basically this is the gist of it. also i’m aware some of this can apply to lots of people but anyways hooray for redheads!!

“His arm swing is the same every time. He just changes his grip, and it breaks differently. Is this.. the next level of his moving fastball?”

Diamond no Ace S2 - 22

Patater Week (Feb 6) Get Together

you know how i said i wasn’t doing this

apparently i am a liar.

(all the week’s fics will go onto ao3)

They literally slam into each other at a roller rink.

It’s a You Can Play benefit thing for kids. Kent’s too busy watching to make sure he doesn’t run over one of the mini-tots that he completely misses the giant headed in his direction. And you would think, wouldn’t you, that a guy whose career involved balancing on knives on ice would take a check on skates as well as he did in an ice rink, but nope. Kent hits Alexei Mashkov head-on and sends them both into a pile on the ground.

The icing on the cake is Kent’s arm clotheslining a six-year-old on the way down.

So now he and Tater are both sitting on the side of the roller skating rink, holding matching cold packs to their faces while a small child stuffs tissues up his nose to stop the bleeding.

“I’mb gonna tell everybody at school that Kent Parsob hit by face!” the kid tells Kent happily, oblivious to his dad’s efforts to keep him from talking and thereby snorting blood everywhere.

Kent gives him a weak thumbs up. At his side, Alexei makes a noise that might actually be a giggle.

“You so cute with kids,” Alexei says.

Damn language barriers, Kent thinks. “You mean I’m good with kids. And I’m not that great. They just like me because I’m ridiculous.”

“You are very ridiculous,” Alexie agrees. “But I’m choose right word, ‘cute.’ You are cute being with kids.”

Kent thinks the head-on collision must have knocked something loose in both their heads. He twists sideways and gapes, the effect of which is probably lost due to the ice pack covering half his face. “I’m sorry. What did you just say?”

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Curiosity

Summary: Phil can’t help wondering what Dan likes so much about bottoming…

Word Count: 1.4k

Genre: honestly genre do u think this is

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yoongi; birthday.

»  Rated PG-13 for massive fluff and brief mature situations.
»  579 words.

The busy rush of the day is slowing down and you steal a moment for yourself at home, putting aside everything on your growing to-do list to flop onto your bed and dial Yoongi’s number. You hum to yourself as it rings, smiling to yourself as the call goes through.

“Hey.” His voice is rough with sleep and you immediately feel guilty, clutching your phone a little tighter. 

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anonymous asked:

So, I love how curvy your art is... like how soft it looks and the smooth lines and I think I drool when I see it. It's so pure and beautiful and I feel like it's half of my personal aesthetic to look so soft... (except that I'm 6' and muscular) A boy can dream though...

thanks so much dude!!! and you can still look nice and soft if you are 6′ and muscular!! everyone looks good in that aesthetic imho. put on a fluffy pastel sweater and hold a mug of tea and you’re on your way (✿ ◕‿◕) ᓄ☕

Compliments and Complements

Originally posted by cute-guysxx

Requests: (by anons)  Could you do a Sebastian imagine where he starts liking the shy, awkward, geeky reader (even though she’s a girl) and it really confuses him and one day he just kisses her and maybe she’ll tell him she likes him too?I love your blog! and Could you write a Sebastian imagine where he falls in love with the awkward, clumsy,shy, geeky reader and it really confuses him cause she’s a girl? And maybe he ends up confessing and they kiss or something? You’re writing is amazing!

Notes: So I realized these two requests were really similar, so I just combined them in one. Also, the entire story is told from Sebastian’s POV, a) because it’s fun, and b) I thought it’d be easier to write him falling in love that way. And the title is just a pun because he always compliments her, and a complement is like half of a whole, or things that go well together.

Y/H- your height

H/L- hair length

H/T- hair texture

H/C- hair color

E/C- eye color

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Apologies for being so absent today! I planned on getting lots of stuff done today but then my big brother called after three weeks of being off working in Perth and we chatted for three hours… I’m off on a grocery run now with mummy but I’ll be back this evening working on match-ups and possibly some short drabbles 💜

So here’s a Skyrim/Naruto crossover starring Tobirama as the Dragonborn. You’re welcome.

Tobirama stays silent as the carriage trundles along down the hill towards Helgen – towards their executioner, undoubtedly, for where else would they send the man beside him but to the block? – and though he doesn’t feel the panic he probably ought to, he does feel a certain sense of dissatisfaction under the numbness and ice in his stomach.

He’s seventeen, barely a man, caught up in a civil war he wanted no part in and had been doing well avoiding up until now. Outside of running away from home in search of something he couldn’t quite name, his life had been nothing extraordinary. The world would not mourn his death. There was no one to grieve him, because he had cut his ties to his former life two years ago and hadn’t let anyone in since.

There is… regret, sinking in alongside tired resignation. That he is to die without anyone knowing, without having done anything anyone would remember him for.

But, especially, he regrets that he’s dying for no good reason. Caught in an ambush, trying to pass through Dark Water Crossing, just unlucky enough to be lumped in with Stormcloaks and a horse thief; this is the culmination of his life. Cut down by the Empire because he was in the wrong place at precisely the wrong time and the soldiers that put them all in ropes couldn’t be reasoned with.

He watches with dull eyes as the horse thief tries desperately to get someone, anyone to listen. No one does, because no one cares – to General Tullius and his ilk, what are a few petty criminals tossed in with rewarding targets like Ulfric Stormcloak?

He thinks he should be angry. In tears maybe, begging like the horse thief is. All he feels is a disconnected sort of sympathy – that Lokir will die here, forever known as “the horse thief” to even his fellow prisoners.

And Tobirama will die, nameless, unknown, and far from home, without anyone who might have cared any the wiser.

The horse thief makes a break for it. Tobirama knows he will die either way, and watches dispassionately as the man is shot down by stone-faced archers.

(Later, he will regret. Because Lokir might have lived, if he had just stayed in line.)

“You there!” the soldier with the list calls. He seems startled when Tobirama meets his eyes, though whether it’s because of his unnerving colouring or his unexpected youth, Tobirama can’t say. “Who are you?”

Tobirama hasn’t gone by his proper name in… well, since he left home. But, here and now, he thinks he’d be thankful if someone knew it. “Senju Tobirama, of Cyrodil,” he replies, voice rough and low from disuse. He’s always been quiet, but more than anything he hates speaking around or to people.

“Captain, what do we do? He’s not on the list,” says the soldier, and he looks concerned now. A good man, then, with an uncommonly soft heart for someone in his position. How novel.

The woman in armour speaks. “He goes to the block.”

It’s sort of funny to him, how crushed the good soldier looks at those words. The man takes a fortifying breath, and says, “By your orders, Captain.” He looks to Tobirama with sad eyes and he wonders if the soldier’s heart is as heavy in his chest as his is. “I’m sorry,” the man says with such heartfelt remorse that Tobirama actually believes it. “We’ll make sure your remains are returned to Cyrodil.”

Tobirama’s chest aches at the very thought, and he says quietly, “Don’t bother.”

The soldier stares at him for a moment, and then nods slowly. “As you wish. Follow the Captain, Senju.” Before he turns away, Tobirama favours the man with a small half-smile, and a near silent, “Thank you.”

Tobirama moves to stand with the other prisoners. Tullius postures and carries on about things everyone is already well aware of, in that way that Tobirama has found is common to all high-ranking people. Self-righteous, perhaps, or simply full of himself – it’s all the same, and he isn’t paying much attention to it to begin with.

He has no interest in fools who talk too much.

A Priestess is beginning to recite last rights when a Stormcloak soldier impatiently stalks forward with a “For the love of Talos, shut up!”, either brave or stupid and quite possibly both. It reminds him of his brother and Tobirama shuts the thought out before it has the chance to hurt him.

Tobirama has seen an execution a grand total of once, and thought the experience disquieting. Now, next to be called to the block, it’s disheartening. How many other innocent people have fallen to the executioner’s axe, guilty of nothing more than poor luck? Likely not as many as he is imagining, and too many to be comfortable.

“Next, the Breton!”

There’s a fine tremor in his hands that he hides by clenching them into fists, his nails biting into the flesh of his palms. He walks as calmly as he can, back straight as he can make it. His last moments will be lived with all the dignity he can cobble together, regardless of the ragged tunic he’s wearing or his bare feet.

He… doesn’t want to die.

He bites his lip, refusing to let tears form. He kneels before the block, side-eyeing the axe that will take his life with something that might be despair; he can’t quite feel it, not really.

He’s only seventeen.

And then, suddenly, there is a dragon.

anonymous asked:

Hayley why the fuck is Bruna friends with that Karamel.... like honestly u guys can run your mouths about fighting against the racism and sexism, and act like you take no prisoners, but you still follow a Karamel shipper just because they act nice? Wtf dude (im talking about darlingdanvers btw) You guys are giving me whiplash one second its "kill all karamels and mon el stans" the other its "no but she's cool, we like the same music and are friends" ?

we’ve never said to ‘kill all karamels and mon-el stans’. that karamel bruna is ‘friends’ with is a literal child y'all know i hate that toxic abusive relationship, but there’s nothing wrong with trying to positively influence actual kids down the right path.