but so special

4

“Now we are at the starting line, as we debuted. We will walk together hand in hand with you. We will help everyone so that nobody is left behind. We will be Pristin, who walks together with you.”

#100DaysWithPristin

sorryfreudianslip  asked:

i would LOVE to hear your thoughts on dear evan hansen if ur up for it i have v strong feelings about it and most of it is disappointment

let’s get the two big bullet points out of the way first:

  • ben platt absolutely deserved the “best actor” tony he received; his work as evan is the one of the most raw, all-in performances I’ve ever seen in a musical. four for you, ben platt. the cast is great across the board, actually, and the accolades they raked in aren’t misplaced. 
  • dear evan hansen should have at least lost the “best new musical” and “best music” tonys to natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812. even if I thought DEH was a complete success (I don’t), its themes of adolescent alienation, mental illness, suicide, and family struggle have been covered equally well by other musicals, including bare and next to normal. the score also isn’t anything new. the songs are fine, with some edging into very good, but again, I give you next to normal. it’s not that DEH is bad, it’s that it’s not breaking any new ground, and that’s what these particular awards exist to honor. 

anyway, now that that’s taken care of. 

My issue with dear evan hansen can be summed up in one sentence: it pulled its punches. this is a story about a kid who’s so socially anxious and desperate for recognition from his peers that he inserts himself into the life of a family who just lost their son to suicide. the first act understands how inherently fucked up that is for everyone, it follows Evan as does his best to soften the blow of loss for the Murphys, and then watches as that lie helps him fall ass-backwards into everything he ever wanted. it understands that despite Evan’s feelings of isolation and his attempts at kindness, he still has a bit of a nasty streak. he doesn’t pull the plug on the ‘me and Connor were so close’ charade because everything it got him feels so good; the girl of his dreams, parents who are always there, the world seeing him as valuable and important. Connor Murphy’s suicide gives Evan the chance to reinvent himself, and reinvent he does. his motivations are twisted up and sad and ugly, and even the “best” thing he pulls off - the creation of the Connor Project - only enters his head because he’s afraid of losing the pull that his connection to Connor gives him. Evan sees himself in Connor, and siphons off people’s anguish to soothe the pain of no one having noticed his own suicide attempt. once you’ve walked your protagonist to that point, you’ve created an emotional and thematic narrative that’s far too messy to be tied off into an uplifting bow. unfortunately, that’s exactly what the show tries to do

the second act teeters on the same tightrope the first walked easily, effective at times (showcasing just how good at bullying Evan’s become when he rejects his own mother + his only friend in favor of the life the Murphys have offered him), less so at others (there’s a late-stage emphasis on pile-on culture that doesn’t go anywhere thematically). It’s not until the end that the show collapses into empty platitudes and pop psychology, knocking the teeth out of what until then has been a vicious tangle of hurt and resentment and grief. when Evan comes clean, we’re supposed to believe that all he ever wanted was to be loved, because his Dad Left, and his Mom Was Absent, and No One Noticed Him. this, despite the fact that we’ve seen Evan be desperate and oily throughout, ingratiating himself with the right words that lean on the right places, going so far as to lie to a girl about what her abusive brother thought of her so he could make a clean breast of how much he liked her. 

this doesn’t make Evan a bad character; on the contrary, that little knot of meanness and desperation is what makes him such a good one. but the show refuses to commit to what it’s created. when he finally tells the Murphys the truth, their reaction of horror and betrayal is exactly what you’d expect–and then the next (and final) two scenes are: 

  1. Evan’s mom cradling her son and telling him that she Should Have Been There More. 
  2. Zoey Murphy fucking agreeing to see Evan again in his orchard of lies

Because it’s fine, you know? It’s been a year since Evan nested into her family’s loss like a raccoon in an attic, and he did get people to kickstart an apple grove for her brother’s memory, so it’s basically like it never happened. People came together over Connor’s death despite Evan’s motives, and it helped the Murphys let go and move on and heal and oh my godddddddd am I going insane? am I the only person who thinks this is the tiredest, most knee-jerk ~closure~ bullshit they’ve ever heard? a breathtaking emotional wound can’t be handwaved away, and certainly not offstage in a cheap time lapse. ugh. if they wanted this ending, Evan should have confessed near the top of the act, and the story should have spent the next 45 minutes earning its neat, uncomplicated little cherry on top. 

I guess at the end of the day I’m annoyed at this show. it starts as something interesting and difficult and very very human. it ends as something that’s had all the poison milked. 

anonymous asked:

Drabble: number 4, " ...let's roll the dice " RafaelxReader, maybe discussing having a baby together, they're married and worried about how it will work out with their jobs and such? Also, congrats on 900 ❤️

*wobbly bottom lip* oooooooomg awe… and thank you so much!!

Originally posted by rundalek


“I saw Noah yesterday,” despite how innocuous it sounded- having his eyes glued to you and awaiting a reaction certainly made it feel more important than it seemed.

Now didn’t quite seem the time for small talk: with you trying to shove documents into a briefcase while simultaneously grabbing bites of breakfast. “Oh did you?” Interestingly enough, he nodded eagerly your way upon acknowledgment. “I bet he’s getting big, it’s been awhile since they’ve been over.”

He pursed his lips in thought, then dropped his gaze to the coffee cup in front of him. “He used to be so small, you know? I remember when he was just a newborn-”

Memory lane for someone else’s toddler? You didn’t really have time for this this morning, but it seemed to mean something to him- “I’m surprised you recall his infancy so fondly, you were scared of the baby.”

Rafael’s jaw fell; “I was not!”

“You refused to hold him,” it was rude to talk while managing a mouthful, but the opportunity was too good to miss even if you were biting onto toast to keep it from falling. “You were terrified of him, you thought you’d break him.”

His brows furrowed together, trying to recall the memory in his mind’s eye. “Well they’re just so… precious, you know… so small, so pure.” 

The way he spoke of babies- it actually caused you to pause. Had he ever really mentioned little children before? You couldn’t think of a time he had, but now it seemed to be the only topic on his mind. “I suppose, when they’re not in the way.”

His face- when he turned to catch your stare again, he looked as if you had somehow pained him. “In the way? I think children are brilliant, why would they be in the way?”

“Since when did you find brilliance in tiny, dependent people?”

“The thought of adoring a child is ludicrous to you?”

This conversation had taken a serious turn you certainly hadn’t anticipated. A quick look at the clock- you really didn’t have time for this right now. “I… I didn’t say that,” what were you even defending, and why did he suddenly care what you thought about children? “I just-”

While you fumbled over an apology you didn’t think was warranted, Rafael stood from his chair. Quickly, he slammed shut the folder he’d been so busy with and stormed past you, not even bothering with a goodbye or his typical kiss for your cheek.

Left alone, and rather bewildered, you suddenly found time: to sit, to stare across at where he had been sitting, to breathe and consider the odd conversation…

Near his barely-touched breakfast was a calendar, with red circles surrounding a date you had already known to be anticipating: His birthday. Another year older, another year wiser… and apparently, another tick for his biological clock.

… Was your dear husband seriously considering fatherhood?


Instead of heading towards the door, as you knew you should be, you wandered through the corridors of your little condo until you finally found him- sitting, in his office chair, trying his best to look distracted with a pretentious novel.

“Rafael;” patience was prevalent in your words, and you hoped your hands laying atop his shoulders could convey the compassion in your heart. “Rafael- why are you suddenly so concerned with children?”

Your stoic man, able to maintain the chaos of a courtroom, slumped back into the cushions. “I… I honestly don’t know,” he lay his head to the side, until his cheek could rest against your knuckles- you lift your thumb to graze his face. “I suppose seeing everyone around me with their kids, watching them get older… while I get older.”

At least this bridge was getting crossed. “Darling, you’ve never said you wanted to have children.”

“I didn’t know I did,” he reached up, curled fingers around your wrist so he could gently tug you around the chair. “To be honest, mi amor, I didn’t know a lot of things until I found you-” laughter, more like nervous chuckling, but you’d take any happiness you could. “I never wanted to be in love, it was all so messy… I certainly didn’t want to get married-”

“Really?” You perched on the arm of his chair, leaned back just enough so you could shoot him a hopeful smirk. “But you fell into husband-hood so well, it’s like you’re a natural.”

“It was easy,” lazily, he drew little circles over your pencil skirt with his fingertips, “I still remember, the moment I first saw you, I wanted it all. You were like a light switch, took all the dark drearies that I lived in and made it bright, showed me the way.”

You combed his hair back, carded through the strands with a careful hand. “All I’ve ever wanted for you was happiness, Rafael.”

“I know,” he nodded, finally found the bravado to look you in the eye, “and all I’ve wanted was to give you everything. To live, to love, to grow with you.”

To grow. He hadn’t quite mentioned that mantra before.

A baby. Of course, there was an extra bedroom in the home, full of light- it’d make a darling nursery. Your man, patient and forever kind- he’d really make a wonderful father. What if, instead of stilettos and the squeak of leather shoes, there were little toes padding over your hardwood floors? That Lucy girl, the Lieutenant’s babysitter- what if she had room to take on another charge sometimes? What if, of an evening, instead of having your noses in case citations and depositions; you two read stories to a teeny tiny bundle of joy?

“Mi amor?” His voice tore you from the rambling list of hypotheticals you had somehow found yourself so preoccupied with. “I probably shouldn’t have said anything, it’s a silly thought,” while you blinked past the haze of switching gears, your precious husband took your hand up in his, pressed a kiss to your skin. “We’re too busy, it would be too much, I must just be being silly-”

To be honest, you had never considered children. Yet for some reason, right in this moment, knowing he had an affinity for the idea, and picturing the domestic paradise that could come with itsy-bitsy spider songs and eency-weency hands… well, the leap of faith didn’t seem so deleterious anymore.

“Rafael,” you rocked off from the chair, shifted so you could crouch before him instead. Taking advantage of his hold on you, you lifted his hand, so you could nuzzle your cheek against his palm. “My love, maybe… maybe a baby would be quite darling… do you think it’d have your eyes?”

Between the two of you, always, there was all the love the world could ever offer- more than either of you ever thought existed. It gave new reason to your soul, new strength in your bones… if the two of you were already so perfect and resplendent; imagine the new life you could bring into the world, together?

Rafael’s lip trembled, he bit back tears the best he could and leaned forward, so he could leave a kiss on both of your blushing cheeks. “The gene pool’s a gamble, mi amor, there’s no telling precisely how beautiful our baby could be…” longingly, desperately, he gathered up both of your hands in his, brought the bundle of fists to rest over his rampantly beating heart. “Mi Corazón, if by any miracle you’d want to bless us with a miracle… let’s roll the dice…”

These kisses were meant for this exact moment: your lips found his, and he tangled his fingers in your hair while cradling your face. Hundreds of times, you two have kissed, yet this precious peck shared at this very moment- it felt like the most glorious affection you’d ever received.

“I’d love that, Rafael… you’ll be the most brilliant Papi there ever was…”

His tears escaped, fell against your cheeks as well as his; and the smile you had been searching for finally reappeared; “Te amo, mi amor… I love you so.”

I’m just going to say that it’s chasing him because he’s probably done what 90% of the Pokémon fandom has done before and called that Klink ugly.

I know that he hasn’t called a Pokémon ugly since the whole true beauty thing with Mimi… but really, Klink should be an exception.

itislove  asked:

please tell us more about your trans shop!

ok so we sell binders and all sorts of prosthetic peens and packing underwear (and similar things for trans women), plus lil badges and flags and tshirts and stuff. plus partnerships with online trans clothing brands. and we have a binder recycling scheme too.
and there’s a chill area where if u just wanna hang out with other trans people you can, or if you feel like you need a chat with someone who Understands and can try offer some advice.
and we also have advice on how to go about transition and trans social groups in the area and all other resources people might need.
and every now and then we do meetups with famous trans people or trans youtubers and it’s such a safe space !!!

5

With Howard being gone, there’s a limit to any kind of changes we were gonna make. But actually for the film, there were a number of places where we found outtake lyrics that Howard had done that were wonderful.

It was such a thrill to discover a new Howard Ashman lyric for Beauty and the Beast.