but shit really pls like it i worked really hard on it

Church Boys Moan Louder

THIS WAS A PROMPT BUT I FUCKED UP AND ACCIDENTALLY POSTED IT EARLY SO NOW ITS GONE FOREVER IM SORRY ANON BUT I STILL WANTED TO FINISH IT SO YE the prompt was basically innocent religious dan and phil like pines after him ; ending in sex in church bathroom and yes, you are going to hell

it’s also really long oops

~

Phil was fucking screwed. Never had he wanted someone so bad as he wanted Dan Howell. That boy fucked with his head and his body and his life. And he wasn’t even TRYING.

If he was trying, he was doing a damn good job at hiding it. Dan seemed completely oblivious to Phil’s attempts to win him over. The light blush on his cheeks said otherwise, but Dan ignored it completely. Dan was the goddamn priests son, but Phil liked a challenge. And this definitely was one.

Phil took another sip of the dumb nonalcoholic punch they were serving, scowling at the plastic cup. He shouldn’t be here, at this dumb church party, he didn’t have to be. It was optional, unlike the weekly services he was required to attend due to his parents getting pissed that he had defiled the school with graffiti yet again. It wasn’t that bad, he got to see Dan at least. But the only reason he was here was for him.

“Hey,” a girl spoke, interrupting Phil’s thoughts. He turned to look at her, scanning her blonde hair and plaid school uniform. Who wears a uniform to a party? Church kids, Phil figured.

“Uh, hey,” Phil responded, sounding completely uninterested, but she didn’t take a hint.

“Fun party, huh?”

Phil raised his eyebrows at her, chuckling, pulling a flask out of his leather jacket pocket and tipping the clear liquid into the cup.

“No, not particularly.”

She seemed a bit put off by that, but bounced back quickly.

“So, do you know anyone here?” She asked, her voice light and Phil swore he heard a hint of flirtiness in her tone

Phil chuckled, his eyes glinting.

“Look, sorry honey, but if you’re trying to get in my pants you might as well give up now. I like cock, dunno if your tiny brain can wrap itself around that, but the only reason I’m here is that I want to fuck Dan Howell.” He casually picked at a black nail, flashing her a tight lipped smile. “So, if you still want to bother me after that, feel free. But I’m gay as hell. Just saying.”

The girl stared at him, her eyes wide and her jaw practically hitting the ground. Phil chuckled. He loved doing that.

She let out a small squeak, whirling on her heel and rushing off. Phil shook his head.

Phil cursed under his breath as he watched her beeline straight to Dan and his group of friends at the other side of the room. Phil couldn’t hear what she was saying, but she pointed at him less than subtly. A blush appeared immediately on Dan’s face, a hand going to cover his mouth automatically. He said something, and glanced over at Phil. Phil winked, waving. Might as well commit.

Dan blushed harder, looking away immediately and pressing his hands to his clearly heated cheeks. Phil smirked. He loved how much of an affect this had on him. He was so responsive.

Phil would just have to wait until he was alone.


~


It was about half an hour of boredom and wanting to leave later when Dan’s friends started to leave one by one, and Phil watched them almost hungrily until the only one left was the girl who had talked to him.

Phil moved along the wall a little closer, straining to hear their conversation. He couldn’t hear her but he heard Dan say “Silvia, I’m fine, I’m just gonna help clean up. I can take care of myself.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with walking home alone?”

“Of course. It’s just a few blocks over.” He offered her a soft smile, touching her shoulder, and Phil’s heart swelled. Damn it. “It’ll be fine. I’ll see you at school, alright?”

“Alright…” she agreed hesitantly, going on her toes to give him a kiss on the cheek, rushing out of the room.

And then it was only them.

Dan cleared his throat, his cheeks beginning to redden again. “So, um, do you want to help clean up, or…”

Phil recognized the opportunity he was offering, and took it. “Yeah, sure. I’d say you’ll probably need a hand.”

Phil helped Dan fold chairs, watching him the whole time while Dan avoided his eyes.

“You look nice,” Dan commented, just being polite, but Phil snorted.

“Are you kidding? I’m wearing rags compared to you. Seriously, who wears a tie to a party in a church basement?”

Dan blushed even harder, glancing down at the black tie fastened neatly around his neck.

“Me, I guess,” he muttered, laughing awkwardly.

“Was that your girlfriend?” Phil blurted.

Dan looked at him then, eyes wide. “Who, Silvia?”

Phil nodded, and Dan laughed. Like, really laughed.

“No!” He exclaimed, shaking his head. “She’s my cousin!”

Now Phil laughed too, pushing his hair back until it sat in a quiff above his forehead.

“Oh Jesus,” he muttered. “Well, thank god.”

He expected Dan to just brush off his comment like he always did, change the subject, look away, something. He didn’t.

“Why’s that?” He asked softly, pressing his lips together and searching Phil’s face. “Why are you relieved?”

Phil shrugged, tossing a plastic cup at the trash and making it. “Because if you were with anyone else, I’d be upset.”

He glanced at Dan, smirking at the way his eyes had widened and his mouth had fallen open just slightly.

“W-Why?” Dan asked again, biting his lip and turning back to the plates he was stacking.

“Because I like you.” He shrugged, casual. “I wanna make you mine, and if people are interfering, that’s a problem, isn’t it baby boy?”

A small gasp escaped Dan’s mouth at the nickname, and Phil smirked.

“Silvia… Silvia said you…” he trailed off, chewing on his lip, his eyebrows furrowed. Phil took this opportunity to step closer.

“That I want to fuck you?” Phil asked, finishing the sentence, and Dan tensed up.

“Yeah…” he muttered, practically a whisper.

“Well, it’s not a lie.” Phil glanced at him, searching his face before turning back to the chair he was folding up. “I’ve been hitting on you for the last month, you didn’t notice?”

Dan shook his head, avoiding his gaze, and they were quiet for a moment.

“You ever kissed a boy?”

“What?!” Dan spluttered, his cheeks redder than Phil had thought possible. “N-No, of course not, I… I couldn’t.”

Phil turned to look at him, frowning, turning his whole body this time so he was facing him.

“Why not?”

Dan faced him too, at a loss for words, his mouth opening and closing.

“I mean, I s-suppose I could but… I CAN’T. That… that’s…” he trailed off, and Phil stepped forward so he was only inches away. Dan froze, but didn’t move away.

He trailed a finger up Dan’s jaw slowly and Dan swallowed, shivering, watching its progress. “You never know if you like something until you try it, right?”

“Well I suppose, but…” Dan gasped as Phil grabbed his tie, wrapping it around his hand and pulling Dan closer.

“But?”

“But…” Dan looked like his mind was going fuzzy, glancing down at the tie that Phil was holding him by and back up at Phil’s eyes, and then his lips. “I’m not gay,” he practically squeaked, his voice small.

“You never know if you like something unless you try it,” Phil repeated, slowly touching Dan’s waist with the hand that wasn’t gripping his tie. Dan didn’t move an inch as Phil leaned over, pressing his lips against Dan’s.

Phil waited a second to make sure Dan wasn’t going to pull away before reaching up to touch Dan’s chin, really kissing him. He dragged his tongue along Dan’s bottom lip, asking for entrance, rather surprised when he actually opened his mouth.

He could feel Dan’s hands shaking as they moved up Phil’s chest, sliding over his shoulders and wrapping around his neck. Phil gripped his waist, pulling him as close as possible. With one hand he tangled his fingers in Dan’s hair, kissing him deeper. He tasted like awful punch and fruit gum, and Phil was sure he tasted like cigarettes, but Dan didn’t seem to mind.

Phil backed him against the wall, kissing him hotly and letting his hands roam Dan’s body. He moved his mouth to Dan’s jaw, kissing down to his neck and nipping at the pale skin. Dan whimpered, moaning softly and tangling his fingers in Phil’s hair.

“Ah-” Dan gasped, letting his head fall back against the wall. “Phil…”

Phil pulled back, pressing his forehead against Dan’s and breathing heavily.

“Is there somewhere we could go?” Phil breathed, and he promised himself if Dan said no, or didn’t get the hint, he would give up. Dan’s brown eyes blinked at him.

“Just one…”

They ended up in the boy’s bathroom, Phil roughly shoving him against the wall and kissing him possessively. Dan whined into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Phil’s neck and clinging to him desperately.

Phil grabbed Dan’s thigh, hooking his leg around his waist and Dan took the hint, hopping up and wrapping his legs around Phil’s waist. Phil went back to his neck, trailing sloppy kisses down to his collarbone.

He unbuttoned Dan’s shirt, loosening and removing his tie before kissing him again. He let Dan push off his leather jacket and tug his shirt over his head, tossing it aside.

Phil’s hands explored Dan’s chest, pinching one of his nipples, and Dan gasped.

“Phil…” he moaned, an indirect beg for more. Phil palmed at his bulge, feeling Dan grind against his hand desperately.

Phil picked him up, spinning them around and setting him down on the counter, tugging at the button of Dan’s black jeans. Once he got them off he flipped Dan over after pressing a kiss to his jaw, bending him over the counter.

“I’m guessing you’ve never done this with a guy before,” Phil muttered, smoothing his hand over the curve of Dan’s ass and squeezing roughly. Dan jumped.

“N-No…”

Phil kissed the nape of his neck, pressing himself against Dan’s body. “Are you sure you want to?”

Dan let out an almost desperate gasp, his voice breaking. “Yes, yesyesyes, god just please… p-please fuck me, Phil, want you.”

Phil grunted, slapping Dan’s thigh sharply. “Jesus, you have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.”

Phil took no time removing his jeans, tugging down Dan’s boxers as well, grinding his still clothed bulge against Dan’s ass. Dan moaned, reaching back and grabbing Phil’s hips, pulling him closer.

Phil’s boxers were off in a second as well, skin rubbing against skin. Dan pushed his ass back; he was a needy bottom and Phil fucking loved it.

Phil held two fingers to Dan’s mouth, motioning for him to open. Dan sucked on the fingers obediently, slicking them up with spit.

“This might hurt a little,” Phil muttered, rubbing Dan’s entrance with one finger. “Tell me to stop if you need to, alright?”

“Mhm,” Dan agreed, pushing his ass back again. Phil slapped it and Dan yelped, pulling forward again.

“Don’t be a needy bitch, Dan,” Phil growled, pushing the first finger into Dan slowly. Dan moaned.

“S-Sorry, sir-” he gasped.

Phil took his time stretching him; considering it was his first time he didn’t want it to hurt too bad. Dan flinched away at first but soon he was whining and grinding back on Phil’s digits. Phil moaned just at the sight, he never thought he’d have him like this.

Finally he pulled out, holding his hand up to Dan’s face again and instructing him to spit. Dan did as he said, and Phil slicked himself up with that as well as precum that was already forming on the head of his swollen cock.

“Ready?” He breathed, pressing his whole body against Dan’s and leaning over him to kiss his neck. Dan whined.

“Yes, yes sir, please, I’m ready, I need you.”

Phil hummed in approval; he loved how quickly Dan had changed from a good little church boy to a desperate slut with just a little kissing.

Phil pushed in slowly, taking his time in edging into Dan, which took an incredible amount of self control on his part. Finally he bottomed out, kneading Dan’s ass in his hands. Dan was a mess beneath him, whining and whimpering at every movement, conflicted between pushing back and pulling away.

Phil reached up, tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair, giving it a soft tug and driving a whimper out of Dan’s pretty mouth.

He began to thrust, pulling almost all the way out and pushing back in slowly, Dan gasping every time he did so. Phil snapped his hips roughly without warning, thrusting hard, and Dan cried out.

“Fuck!” He practically shrieked, a loud feminine moan falling from his mouth.

“You’re a loud little slut, aren’t you?” Phil panted, groaning as he thrust roughly again. Dan let out a high pitched whine.

“Fuckfuckfuck p-please, fuck, harder…”

Phil obliged, driving his cock deeper into the whimpering boy, skin slapping on skin echoing through the room. Phil tugged on Dan’s hair again, watching his face through the mirror, and fuck he could cum just from that.

Dan’s lips were swollen, his cheeks red and flushed, his hair messy and his eyes glazed over with need. Phil groaned, snapping his hips.

Phil knew he had hit Dan’s prostate when he screamed, a loud “FUCK, PHIL” bouncing off the walls. Phil smirked, angling his thrusts to hit that spot.

“This is a sin, you know,” Phil growled, reaching up to cover Dan’s mouth with his hand as he fucked into him harder. “Such a filthy fucking sinner for me, princess, ruined on my cock.”

Dan’s desperate muffled moans against his hand were pushing him to the edge, that and his tight heat encasing Phil’s cock. Phil smirked.

“Such a pretty fucking sinner too, isn’t that right? All for me. Your tight ass is all mine, yeah?”

Dan didn’t answer, continuous moaning falling from his mouth, muffled by Phil’s hand. He just nodded frantically, his moans sounding close to sobs.

Dan came after a few more thrusts all over his stomach, white streaking the counter under him and he whimpered, now sensitive to Phil’s cock pounding into his prostate every thrust.

Phil pulled out, quickly tugging Dan to his knees in front of him, guiding his cock to his lips. Dan took it obediently, lowering himself on Phil’s length. Phil groaned, tangling his fingers in Dan’s hair and fucking his throat as gently as he could. Dan gagged, digging his fingernails into Phil’s hips, and that was all it took. Phil came down his throat, keeping his cock still until he was sure Dan had swallowed all of it.

He helped Dan to his feet, holding him steady because it was clear he was close to falling over.

Dan just stared at him, stunned, watching as Phil casually got dressed. After he was clothed he cleaned Dan’s stomach and the counter with a paper towel, tossing it in the trash.

He grinned, kissing Dan’s cheek and backing towards the door, winking.

“See you next Sunday, Danny.”

fic: No Strings

title: no strings.

genre: smut/humour

word count: 3000

description: Phil really misses sex and it turns out that Dan really misses sex, too. So…they just decide to have sex together. No strings. FWB minus the usual dramatic storyline that follows. Hilarity and #bants ensues.

“Just sex?” Phil repeats, “No strings?”

“Yes,” Dan nods, “that’s generally what no strings means,”

“Literally just sex?”

“Fucking hell. Look, Phil, I can spell it out for you or you can put your dick in my ass - it’s totally your choice. Have sex and be satisfied or wank alone to a Muse song again. What’s it gonna be?”

a/n: this is obviously smut but it’s actually funny too i promise, and it’s not like super graphic smut where you’ll cringe or whatever it’s…well, you’ll see. just read it and trust me.

Keep reading

hey i wanna talk about erik klose

  • “i feel like he could hold me up forever” erik isn’t just emotional support he’s a soccer player and he is s t r o n g
    • he got them Midfielder Thighs™
  • he fuckin loves soccer movies ok 
    • nicky, already grinning, in response to erik’s parents asking how his day was: alles ist gut
    • erik, sliding into the room in his socks and running into a wall: soLANGE DU WILD BIST!!!!!
    • used Bend It Like Beckham and She’s The Man to practice his english
    • he definitely has a poster of jess bhamra in his room, she’s his hero
  • he is SUPER tall
    • (he’s actually taller than matt when his hair isn’t spiked)
  • him and nicky are low key competitive as fuck and they run together when nicky starts training for exy
  • nicky quickly learns that trying to outlast a midfielder on a run just. doesn’t work. they do the most running on the team and typically go whole games without getting subbed out.
    • 3 miles in nicky is wheezing and dying and erik is laughing like the absolute traitor he is
  • but!! it wasn’t all sunshine at first i mean come on,, this is the foxes
    • when nicky first got to the Klose’s he was reserved, quiet. 
    • erik was taking a year off to travel with friends during the first 6 months nicky was there
    • when both parents agreed nicky could stay for the summer for some extra classes so he could graduate on time (by american standards), he finally met erik
    • tall, athletic, kind erik, erik who came home with all kinds of candy from all kinds of countries to give to a boy he never met all to make a pun about what a “sweet deal” it was to have someone new in the house, he felt his heart race when nicky smiled at him for his ridiculous efforts
    • that’s the first time the klose’s saw a real smile come from nicky
  • erik convinced nicky to go to church after a while
    • it was hard at first, especially when nicky noticed erik was getting some weird looks from some of the older people in the congregation
    • when nicky asked why, erik told him about how when he came out his grandmother stopped speaking to him, and how some parents didn’t want to let erik come over to see his friends
    • but then erik told him how his parents told anyone who wasn’t okay with their son that they weren’t worth having around, that they loved erik and they wouldn’t allow anyone to try and make him feel bad for being himself
    • and how his cousins snuck out and took him to his first pride parade in hamburg
    • surrounded by people who actually care, nicky started to hope again
  • nicky starts to smile more and erik…he’s so smitten. his new mission in life is to make nicky smile
  • erik’s humor is usually really awful puns and dad jokes, but he also is really good at keeping a straight face while saying absolutely ridiculous things, leading people to question whether he’s really serious or not and nicky fighting super hard not to bust out laughing (because he’s the only one who can tell he’s joking)
  • nicky prides himself on being pretty fashionable so he’s not entirely sure how the hell he lets erik get away with wearing those awful toe shoes. the. the individual toe ones.
    • you know the ones
  • the first time they kiss, erik was climbing a tree and fell out, because all his grace stops the minute he steps off the field
    • it was a forehead kiss because, well, erik’s face was bleeding, but yea
    • they’re a bit of a mess, but they’re cute, ya know?
  • nicky and erik are the type of couple to go to the grocery store at 2am because they really want to make mac n cheese and accidentally end up buying 4 pounds of candy instead while serenading each other to the weird 90s music the store is playing
  • erik loves aldi’s and wants to live there. everything is so cheap, nicky. they have my favorite cheese, nicky. nicky. where are you going. nicky i live here don’t leave we haven’t bought any bread yet-
  • he owns crocs. he just. he does. he bought orange ones when nicky joined the foxes and fuckin little white fox paw insert thingies because he’s a supportive boyfriend, dammit
  • he draws smiley faces on everything. notes to nicky, his notes at school, on his meeting notes at work, and his favorite place: on nicky. 
  • he’s one of those people who can’t tan for shit, he just burns then freckles. nicky is constantly nagging him to wear sunscreen. he always forgets and sends nicky pictures of his bright red shoulders only to get pages of texts ranting about sunscreen and melanoma
  • he’s got scars everywhere but theyre all from like. the dumbest stuff. there’s a big one on his knee from sneezing while on a run and subsequently tripping on the sidewalk and wiping out. several are from falling out of trees. he broke his nose falling out of the shower because he freaked out when he saw a spider. again, all his grace is on the soccer field. everywhere else he’s a hazard.
  • he’s really, really clumsy. he loves fiercely because that’s how his parents taught him. he knows he’s lucky to have a family that stuck by him, he knows it’s the least they can do, but so many gay kids have shitty parents. kids like nicky. and erik may be gangly and clumsy. he may be competitive and he may not always understand how nicky feels because he hasn’t experienced what nicky has. but he has fallen out of more trees than anybody he knows, and falling in love with nicky is an ache he’s never been able to ice away, and would never want to anyway.

anonymous asked:

Hi! You seem to enjoy cute asks, how about RFA/V/Saeran sharing bed with MC for the firstest time? First is always special; will they be super nervous and self-conscious? Spend a sleepless night afraid their love might stop breathing? (happened to me once!) Or just immediately relax and cuddle all night? Hog the blanket? Or would there be instant passion? But definitely MC won't take "i'll sleep on the couch" for an answer!

A/N: This is so cute i do enjoy cute thANK YOU (mainly because I can’t do angst i kinda just…. *slowly slides the angst inboxes to 626*) ~Admin 404

cRYING I LOVE THINKING ABOUT SLEEPING WITH V THANK U NONNIE ~ Admin 626

*YOOSUNG:
-EXCITED AS ALL HELL HE’S NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE YES MC COME HERE
-He’d be pretty self-conscious about moving or snoring or something
-WHAT IF HE DROOLS ON MC OMG N O
-He’s so scared and tries to stay awake
-But that doesn’t work out, he falls asleep pretty quickly
-BLANKET HOG
-He likes to roll himself up into a blanket burrito and subconsciously forgets that you’re in bed with him
-It’s like fighting to the death to get into that blanket burrito just so you don’t freeze
-He’s used to cuddling a smaller stuffed animal, so he isn’t used to the fact that you’re a normal sized person
-You end up being the big spoon but that’s okay because he’s such a cutie omg

*JUMIN:
-Cool Calm Collected™
-Until it acTUALLY CAME TO IT *Internal screaming*
-He holds you close and absolutely loves the feel of you there
-You’re like a little heater and just WOW laying with you is way different than laying with Elizabeth
-But he just cannot sleep? No matter how hard he tries?
-He’s tried counting sheep, focusing on his breathing, focusing on YOUR breathing, but nothing worked out
-Gave up and accepted that he wasn’t going to sleep that night, he’ll have to drink a lot more coffee in the morning than usual
-It’s just what he’s used to, so it’s really hard to get comfortable enough to sleep
-He couldn’t help but admire how cute you looked when you were asleep, he couldn’t look away (though sometimes he forced himself too because wow jumin that’s a lil creepy stop that)
-Never once let you go though. If it seemed like you were waking up in the middle of the night, he’d hold you closer and internally freak out. He wanted you to have a perfect night’s sleep! Waking up would ruin that! HIS DARLING MC NEEDS TO SLEEP EVEN IF HE CAN’T

*SAEYOUNG:
-Immediately falls asleep
-He has no problems sharing a bed
-He snores a little bit but it’s sooooo cute omg
-Rolls over and cuddles you as close as you can get to his chest
-Nuzzles his face against the top of your head and he’s just aDORABLE
- honestly he’s just glad he didn’t have any nightmares this time
-But he’s SUCH A BED HOG
-You wake up because??? Your ass hit the floor
-AND HE DIDN’T WAKE UP. HOW DID THE LOUD ASS THUNK NOT WAKE HIM UP????
-You throw yourself across him just so you can lay down and attempt to sleep and he just doesn’t move. He gets a good night’s sleep but you’re left strung across him, uncovered, annoyed

*SAERAN:
-He really didn’t want to because he’s very uncomfortable
-But he’ll give it a shot, just for you
-Absolutely no sleep at all (poor bby ;A;)
-What if you stopped breathing? What if something happened in your sleep? WhaT IF
- pls calm down saeran and just sleep
-He does like holding you though, won’t admit it, but he does
-When you put his head to your chest, hoLY SHIT
-He’s calmed down by the sound of your heartbeat cutie cutie
-Always makes sure you’re covered, comfortable, not too hot, not too cold
-Likes to drag his fingertips up and down your spine but if you make any sort of movement he practically throws himself away from you because he’s embarrassed

*ZEN
- hE’S SO HAPPY
- but also really nervous???
- what if the beast comes out wHAT WILL HE DO
- he obviously wouldn’t do anything but still
- but all the nervousness goes away once he sees how sleepy you are
- oMFG YOU’RE ADORABLE IN UR PAJAMAS
- totally not staring at ur legs
- and you find out Zen is a HUGE snuggler
- you should have known this???
- like he’s so affectionate when he’s awake, it just makes sense for him to treat u like a teddy???
- you’re dying cause he’s like a furnace and u jUST WANNA SLEEP but you can’t wake him up he’s so adorable
- since this your first time ever, of course he’s gonna be extra dramatic
- when he wakes up, he’s gonna stare at u cause ur gorgeous even with all the drool
- he showers you in kisses omg
- he just spends the morning spoiling you cause you’re his princess <3
 
*JAEHEE
- the first time you guys share the bed it’s totally an accident???
- usually after you two do the diddly do, you end up going home because you don’t have enough stuff at jaehee’s to stay over
- but over time all of your stuff magically started to collect at her place
- hell, the closet is is 75% yours
- so one night after the frick frack, you’re just chilling in bed with her, she’s drawing imaginary designs on you
- and you’re both so exhausted from work that you just fall asleep
- when you wake up in the morning, you find her snuggled up to her pillow and you burst out giggling
- you quiet yourself down though because you don’t wanna wake her up yet <3
- since she finally has a day off, you wanna let her sleep in and yOU’RE GONNA TREAT HER LIKE A PRINCESS TODAY
- you finally get up and make breakfast for two <3
 
*V
- you and V take naps together all the time
- it’s like a hobby for u two
- so you thought sharing the bed the first time together wouldn’t be a big deal
- except you find yourself freaking out???
- he’s gonna see you when you wake up in the morning and you’ll look so ugly omg
- so you do everything you can to make sure you wont look to bad in the morning
- you use expensive perfume, you wear silk pajamas, you moisturize the heck out of your skin
- and when V walks in, you feel so ridiculous omg
- he’s just wearing normal pajamas, his hair is messy
- he knows he’s gonna look like a hot mess when he wakes up, he aint about to try
- when he sees you, his eyes widen cause damn u lookin fine, but he laughs because he knows exactly how ridiculous your thoughts must have been for u to do this
- so he just hugs you and you both go to bed and snuggle the heck out of each other <3
- you totally don’t set an alarm to wake up before him
- he also didn’t do the same exact thing

beaureqard  asked:

pls disragard these questions if you arent feeling like explaining anthropology that is probably not within your specific field, but i have questions and somehow youre the most accessible source for answers about ancient-ass humans. so: why are humans so much hardier than other animals? like if you break a horse's bone that horse is kaput, but people bounce back from shit like missing limbs. how are we so cool? also, how prevalent (and when) was pursuit predation? also, thanks! have a nice day

OH no worries, this is something I teach every year and it’s REALLY COOL. There’s footnotes and works cited below the jump if you want them, and I can point you at some other work if this is something you’re interested in reading about.

Humans are ridiculously resilient. The reason for this has a lot to do with the tradeoffs we made for endurance rather than speed. Human walking is really energy efficient (it’s really just controlled falling) compared to a horse’s galloping, and we have pretty well-muscled legs. Our plantigrade feet mean that there’s not as much energy when we spring off compared to an animal that runs on their toes, but at the same time, we spend a lot less energy moving around. 

Our muscles and leg anatomy have a lot to do with it, too. Let’s look at a horse’s leg compared to a human’s.

Horses in particular have a hard time with broken legs because they have a LOT of mass resting on on those legs. Horses’ legs are basically built to go fast- their leg bones are actually quite light, and below the ankle there’s… well, basically nothing. Just tendon and skin- there’s no big muscles to stabilize or cushion the bone. This means that there’s less weight to drag around so the horse can escape a predator more quickly, but it comes with a major tradeoff- if a horse breaks their lower leg, it tends to shatter. In the wild, this is going to make the horse extremely easy to pick off. But like I said up there, humans- unlike horses- don’t run on our toes. Our ankle bones are chunky and strong, and our lower legs are cushioned with muscle and fat. 

But our healing ability goes beyond just basic anatomy! Our group dynamics also play into this, too. If a horse breaks a leg, what can the other horses do about it? The injured horse still has its biological needs to fulfill; it has to eat, drink, and evade predators. It has to keep moving- it can’t lie down for a few weeks and let the leg heal. But that’s not true of humans and our closest relatives! I’ll use Neanderthals for this example because I like them a lot, but the same goes for early modern humans, too. 

Let’s say that some Neanderthals are out on the hunt, and Thog gets knocked against a tree trunk by a mammoth and she breaks her leg. Because Thog’s a member of a social species, it’s not the end of the world for her or her group. The rest of her crew can keep hunting and Thog can limp back home, where her grandfather looks after her and her younger sister brings her water. She’s able to rest and keep weight off the broken leg, which means that so long as she keeps whatever wounds there might be relatively clean, sepsis is less likely. Group living means that you don’t have to be self-sufficient; no hominin is an island. Part of why we’re so successful is that our ability to care for each other ensures better group survival. If your reproductive-age individuals are also providers, group care means that you’re less likely to lose them

We know from looking at Neanderthal skeletons that they were injured frequently and were able to shake it off and survive; even elderly individuals with severe arthritis are often found in group contexts, suggesting they weren’t left behind. And we are talking serious injuries here- not just broken legs, but head and neck trauma, too. There’s a famous paper* that says that most Neanderthal injuries came from close contact hunting (due to them being mostly head and neck injuries rather than lower body injuries), but more up-to-date research notes that actually, Neanderthals could- and did- get hurt pretty much everywhere**. 

As to when pursuit predation came into effect, the best guess we have is “probably sometime around two million years ago, practiced by Homo erectus/ergaster.” One way we can tell this is by diet. Mandibles are very quick to adapt to dietary pressures, so by comparing mandibles to things with known diets, we’re able to tell what’s going on. Add that to dental wear and morphology studies and chemical analysis of subfossils’*** teeth and we can get a pretty good picture of who’s eating what. What we see with the H. erectus/ergaster complex of species is that they’re eating a wide variety of very tough foods; their jaws and molars suggest that they were eating root vegetables, tough meat, tubers, bone marrow, honey- really, anything they could find. We also know that they were eating a fairly high calorie diet compared to their predecessors; this was necessary for brain development- and we know that these calories came from meat. As average brain mass increases, so does evidence of meat-eating. Brain development is expensive- you have to put a lot of nutrients into it- nutrients that are really hard to get from plants alone. One way to feed the family is by hunting- though realistically this didn’t happen all that regularly. Rather, it’s more likely that hunting supplemented gathering, as it does with many forager groups today; hunting takes a lot of energy and can be dangerous.

Archaeology also points to the “around two million years ago” date based on stone tool deposits and fossil prey species. One good example of this is Kanjera in Kenya; it’s a site by Lake Victoria that has good evidence for persistence hunting. There’s quite a lot of gazelle and antelope skeletons that aside from stone tool marks, don’t have a lot of damage. It looks like these were brought to the site for butchering- and they would have had to be hunted because hyenas, lions, and other predators and scavengers will actually eat those bones. Gazelles are a lot faster than humans, and the hominins of the time didn’t really do projectiles; rather, it’s more likely they ran the gazelles down until they were exhausted, then dragged them back to this lakeside camp site to process and eat. It’s likely that this strategy helped fuel the migration of Homo into Asia; once you’re able to hunt big game, your movement is less restricted by the availability of small animals, scavenged meat, and seasonal plants; you can follow herd animals and just chase one whenever you need to eat. However, the exact role that hunting and scavenging played in the development of the Homo genus is something that archaeologists and physical anthropologists do not agree on- when you’re trying to figure out what a species eats and how they got their food, you gotta realize that this can vary heavily by what’s available, what predators are in the area, your own group’s composition, and myriad other factors that can affect food acquisition. 

One thing we do know for sure: Persistence hunting works. Our species is super good at it, even today. If you’d like to see some persistence hunting in action, it’s actually still used by San groups in Africa.

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imagine haikyuu characters in the pokemon universe for a sec

like holy shit this thought just came to me

YOUR RIVAL
Game rivals would be Hinata/Kageyama, doing the whole dual rivalry like what happened with Cheren and Bianca in B/W. Sometimes, one might act like a psuedo-rival and give the main player stuff
(ie. Hinata: “Hey, [f/n]! Uh, I wanted to thank you for helpin’ me out there… so… here! Have this!” [Obtained a max revive]” or alt.
Kageyama: “Are you an idiot?! Going into the forest with your Pokemon in that shape will only have you heading to the Pokecenter! Here, I’ll heal them up.”)

both are super proud of each other’s progress low-key and they both high-key really wanna beat ushijima.

THE PROFESSOR
Coach Ukai, because there’s always been something between the mom of the game and the professor i know it he inherited the title after his old man, the genius professor, retired.

Professor Assistants
Shimizu Kiyoko and Yachi Hitoka. Shimizu’s about to go out and become a proper trainer, so she gets Yachi to fill in her spot while she’s gone.

THE EIGHT GYM LEADERS (in order!)

Tanaka - the fighting type gym leader. wANTS TO SHOW YOU ALL HOW TO RESPECT A REAL GYM LEADER, DAMMIT. when you’re beat he’s just like “wow not bad i didn’t expect that from you but pssht don’t get cocky” (also knows you’re good and have potential and thinks you may become champion). PERSONALLY LEADS YOU TO THE NEXT CITY, all just so he can see noya-san, the returning gym leader.

Nishinoya - the FIRE TYPE GYM LEADER BECAUSE LOOK RYUU!! FIRE!!! HAHAHAHAH. these two definitely make the strongest start to a video game. like, ever. very loud, and energetic. 

Tsukishima - the poison-type gym leader, actually? i dunno i just can’t see him trying too hard, so he’s only the third. still, he has lots of potential (that half of the elite 4, kuroo and bokuto respectively, recognize–which leads to constant pestering from their part), and despite only being the third gym leader, if unprepared, his poison affects are devastating to newcomers. 

Asahi - the game’s lovely high-strung steel type, with nerves that DO NOT MATCH. gets super nervous before a match, and although he does very well and is very strong and gets more motivated as the match goes on (and holy crap if this guy had a legendary pokemon it’d be regigigas or something because of the slow start ability RESONATING from this guy). visited often by nishinoya, who often complains about asahi’s nervous demeanor.
also want one point where they have to fight the enemy team of the game and they buddy up and defeat them because hey who doesn’t want a sprinkle of asanoya in their life

Iwaizumi - the rock type gym leader. sorry, it didn’t even take me long to decide on this. His last name literally comes with the word rock in the first character pls. Combined with his steadfast personality, it works perfectly. When you beat him he just asks for you to kick shittykawa’s ass. Even tells you his pokemon type and starts telling you his pokemon and their dreadful moves until he’s cut off by some random plot device.

Akaashi - i honestly can’t help but say he’d be the ghost-type gym leader. he doesn’t put his gym in a freaking cemetery or have ghosts wander around, but he’s actually rather nice about it all and takes pity on the ghosts because seriously have you read some of their pokedex entries yeesh. his signature pokemon would be a drifblim, because of the dual flying/ghost nature. it’s his favourite, and it’s bokuto’s favourite, too. loved by many, and goes out of his way to help out even the most dramatic pokemon. maybe you’d meet him if there were a rogue ghost in the city, causing damage, and akaashi walks up and helps it calm down (almost the same way he does with bokuto)

Sugawara - i really wanted to make sugawara the nurse, but in the end i feel like he’d be a really strong grass-type gym leader. the healing thing still came to me though, so i’d see it as a strong type with annoying healing abilities. right when you’re about to defeat his pokemon, he hits you up with ingrain or synthesis and saves by a sliver, making the battle that much harder.
another thought was that at the end of the game he’s actually offered to become an elite 4 but so is kageyama. he’s been a gym leader for a long time, but steps down so kageyama can have it.

Kenma - surprisingly, (or maybe unsurprisingly) the psychic-type gym leader. as the final gym leader before the elite 4, he’s really strong and definitely has a good grasp on all the types of moves there are (stats, inflicting damage, reducing, as well as extra effects) and even accounts for the type weaknesses. often hangs out with kuroo and grows to be friends with your rival hinata. although kuroo never lets him explicitly state that he’s the dark type elite 4, it’s implied. refuses to become an elite 4 personally, because it’s already too much effort being a gym leader. 

THE ELITE FOUR

Daichi - the grounded leader is now the ground-type elite 4! has really strong and nice pokemon. hangs with suga. i don’t know why, but i’d imagine that they garden, since he’s the ground-type elite 4 and suga’s the grass-type gym leader. at the very least, his area has flowers growing somewhere in homage to their friendship.
idea was that he steps down from being an elite 4 to go focus on other things and become stronger, allowing suga to become one. read suga’s section for more.

Kuroo - dark-type elite four! debated on fire vs dark for a loooong time, but couldn’t help but see dark as the strongest feature. plus they’re badass, so kuroo would def brag about that to bokuto. First seen talking to Kenma at his gym, saying that he should hurry up and become an Elite 4 member already, since he already knows he’s qualified enough.

Oikawa - water-type elite 4. probably the most well-rounded elite 4 in terms of stats, with pokemon that can heal and attack strong and defend well and everything. wants to become champion (beat ushiwaka), but realizes he has to get stronger before doing that. really playful. his identity is not kept secret at ALL the entire game, as he has his own radio channel about him with water pokemon (looking cute while using cute pokemon to gain fans) and iwaizumi namedrops him earlier on during his battle.
(lowkey inspired by ao3 superpower haikyuu fanfic, “baby, i can give you wings” by Metis_Ink, which is wonderful and can be read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2185851)

Bokuto - THE FLYING-TYPE ELITE 4. I don’t know why but i can’t imagine him taking the battle completely seriously and just doing some dumbass strategy that proves to be super broken. Something like Drayden from BW2, with some stupid dialogue like “AAARGH JUST WAIT FOR THE FINAL ATTACK!!! IT’LL BE AWESOME!” while doing 2-3 stat-raising moves or charging moves and then one broken ability that does a shit ton of damage. Kinda like the papyrus we never got in undertale. Alternately, a one-hit K.O. move. Gets super depressed when defeated, and can be seen after at a cafe with Akaashi, complaining.

THE CHAMPION
This would undoubtedly be the prodigy we all know and love, Ushijima Wakatoshi. Trained since a kid, and worked really hard. A good champion, and definitely worthy of the title. 

OTHER APPEARANCES
Takeda-sensei - the ‘mom’ of the game. Not an actual Pokemon trainer, but wishes the best for the main character when they go off, making sure they’re well-prepared and researching enough to send them off with a smile. (also dropping by with occasional “hey, hope you’re doing okay!”s) while you’re on your journey.

Lev - while you’re with kenma’s gym (with a visiting kuroo), there’s a little unskippable side-quest where Lev begs kenma to teach him how to catch pokemon, much to kenma’s annoyance. kuroo eventually defeats all his pokemon (doing something like beating a level 6 pidgey with a level 60 hydreigon, or trolling him by pulling out a lvl 60 zoroark that’s disguised as a small grass-type), but teaches lev good lessons in the process.
is also trying to be taught by Yaku, an actual experienced ace trainer who just can’t help but be annoyed at Lev. 

Yamaguchi - some guy at the beginning of the game who shows you how to use pokemon and stuff. he’s either a normal-type trainer or a fairy-type trainer, or at least has an affinity with those two.

more au ideas no one asked for
  • “you’re super short and i’m sorry but it’s really really cute whenever you try to reach that book on the top shelf here lemme help you- oh no don’t be embarrassed, your face is all red and you’re even more adorable now i am going to die” au
  • “i’m a biker and one day i was biking in your neighborhood while you just happened to be outside watering the plants and since you’re so goddamn cute i accidentally steered into a pole and now you’re giving me first aid (holy shit you’re even cuter up close)” au
    • “you’re biking through my neighborhood and you ran into a pole so now i’m really concerned and patching you up, oh my gosh you’re really hot even though you have a bloody nose” au
  • “i’m at a karaoke bar and i’m sober enough to realize that your voice singing my absolute favorite song is the most beautiful thing i’ve ever heard, and you caught me staring and winked at me oh shit” au
  • “you fell asleep on my shoulder on the plane ride and i would ask you to move but you look so comfy and adorable when you sleep. also you smell really good and the feeling of your breath on my skin is somewhat relaxing, maybe we can go out to lunch in this shitty airport when you wake up?” au
  • “you’re so perfect and i’m in love with you but i’ve never actually met you and you keep avoiding meeting up, so i called nev and max to help me figure out whether or not you’re catfishing me” au
    • “whoa it turns out you were actually just super shy and you’re even cuter in person pls kiss me in front of all these cameras” au to followup with that
  • “i’m a quiktrip worker and whenever I work a night shift, you always arrive and buy like 3 cans of redbull and you look exhausted, do you need some help? are you okay?” au
  • “you invited me to your brother’s/sister’s wedding as a plus one bc we’re hella best friends but we end up making out at the afterparty and now everyone thinks we’re fucking so uh,, u wanna go out for a drink sometime? try this whole couple thing out?” au
  • “my sister tried to set me up with her friend but little does she know that i am hella gay and i end up falling in love with her smoking hot brother, and whenever i hang at her place we always tell my sister that it’s for a date when really she’s now just trying to set me up with her brother” au
    • (this can be tweaked in any way to fit your otp :p)
  • “i’m one of those talk show stars that walks up to random people on the streets and asks them really obscure questions, and you’re really cute and camera shy and i’m sorry but it’s adorable how you stutter when you’re nervous, uh, perhaps when there aren’t so many cameras surrounding me i can buy you a drink?” au
    • “you just came up to me on the street and asked where the weirdest place i had sex was and i’m assuming it’s for one of those talk show things, but i’m really nervous because you’re really really hot in that suit holy shit” au
  • “will you stop flirting with me you just got seriously injured and i’m the EMT trying to tend to your wounds in the ambulance, i don’t give a fuck that i look cute when i’m concerned, you’re lucky you’re not dead you dipshit” au
  • “my mom/sister/dad/brother/best friend doesn’t know we’re dating but one day he/she/they walked in on us making out and started cheering oh my god this is so embarrassing i’m so sorry” au
  • “you have fire powers and i have ice powers and one day you save my ass and even though we’re supposed to be rivals, you’re actually really really cute and warm can i just stay in your arms forever bc i am perpetually cold” au
    • “you have ice powers and i have fire powers and i save your sorry ass from getting hurt/killed, okay i know we’re supposed to be rivals according to every legend ever but you’re adorable and wow you’re really cold, would you like me to warm you up?” au
  • “i’m so sorry i’ve been stowing away on your ship but i’m lonely and tired and starving with nowhere to go so please take pity on my poor soul bc you’re the sweetest pirate i have ever met and since we’re in the middle of the ocean now there’s no way you’re taking me back to land anytime soon” au
    • “i would be furious at you for stowing away on my ship if it weren’t for the fact that you look really sick and sad can i help you” au
  • “dude why did that siren take on my image to try and seduce you, is there something you wanna tell me” au
  • “I’m an elf with really bad aim so while hunting i accidentally shot you in the shoulder with an arrow i’m so sorry can i make it up to you in any way? oh shit you’re a wizard, please don’t turn me into a frog i’ll do anything you want me to” au
  • “we’re coworkers and all the other employees ship us so just for fun we all go out clubbing/to a bar but little do we know its actually a plot they set up to get us to realize our supposed love for each other. wait you’re actually a really good dancer and your laugh is so endearing and, holy shit, maybe our colleagues were right” au
  • “i catch you at the bus terminal shivering your ass off because it’s 30 degrees and for some godforsaken reason you’re wearing a short sleeve t shirt, so out of pity i lend you my hoodie and you look so surprised it’s the cutest thing i’ve ever seen, setting aside the fact that you’re a goddamn idiot, do you want to get sick?” au
    • (cont.) “you look so sad and cold that i just tell you to keep my hoodie b/c you obviously need it more than i do. a week later i see you at a coffee shop/book store/etc. and you’re wearing my hoodie which you look so fucking tiny and cute in, and you just saw me and you look super embarrassed; you offer me it back but i tell you it suits you more and we end up talking and i buy you a drink” au
  • “we’re partners in cupcake wars and i never realized how cute you look with frosting on your face until now but no distractions, we have to fucking pummel these other teams because we are the best goddamn cupcake company in the universe WE CAN DO THIS” au
  • “i’m swimming laps in a lake alone at night and i thought no one else was here but i just swam right into you and uh?? you’re not wearing a shirt and you’re hot as hell pl ease take me right here” au
  • “i took you to my family’s lakehouse and we went jetskiing which you were so adorably excited about b/c you’ve never been, and when we drove around on the water at ungodly speeds u held onto me b/c there was nothing else to hold onto” au
  • “my friends dared me to buy 20 condoms but i didn’t realize that the cute cashier would be working tonight so i avoided eye contact as i piled them onto the counter and please stop laughing so hard, oh my god it’s for a dare okay i’ve never had sex in my life and once you stopped laughing, i swear i fell in love with that sparkle in your eye as you grinned wildly at me and asked me out for a drink” au
  • “i accidentally called the wrong skype number and it turns out the person i called was you and you’re in a different time zone, so it’s 3am where you are and you just woke up and look fucking pissed but you’re cute so… let’s do this again when you’re not asleep. i’m more than willing to stay up into the dead of night to talk to you” au
  • “i’m a radio host who indirectly mentions you and flirts with you on my show but you’re so goddamn clueless, please just notice me i’m so desperate for you it’s kind of sad (see: welcome to night vale)” au
Shit, it’s father’s day ! - Bruce Wayne x Reader

So, I’m not close from my father. Like, not at all. We’re mostly strangers. So I completely forgot that it was Father’s day today…I actually realized it was that specific day thanks to Hugh Jackman and his instagram account where he posted a picture of his dad and him…ANYWAY, I wrote something for Batman, I feel like I HAVE TO write something for Batdaddy to yo. LITERALLY WROTE IT IN TWENTY MINUTES THOUGH, cause I got things to do today but felt inspired. So here it is, hope you’ll like it : 

Sorry for spamming you with two “stories” in the span of like an hour but I felt super inspired and boom. My masterlist blog by the way : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com)

_________________________________________________

-Bruce. Bruce. Bruce ?!

Alarmed by the emptiness next to you in bed, you sit up. It’s not like your husband to leave your shared bed without telling you, without a kiss or hell, without making love to you. 

It’s not like him indeed, as he didn’t really leave the bed. He’s sitting on the edge of it, looking out the window of your bedroom. Worries fill your voice when you ask, a bit unsure : 

-Bruce…My heart, are you alright honey ? 

Bruce grumbles back an answer you don’t hear, and you crawl to him. Your tempted to hug him from behind, wrap your arms around his torso, your legs around his waist, your head resting on his back (he’s too tall for you to reach anything else but the middle of his back with your head)…But you feel like something is off. 

It’s pretty obvious really. The way he groaned at you. The fact he isn’t in bed anymore. The way his back is hunched and…just the fact he’s not in your arms right now. He doesn’t even look at you when you approach him, so you decide to drop the hug from behind, and sit next to him. 

He still doesn’t look at you, and you panic a little. It’s so unlike him…

-Bruce ? Please, say something…Did I do something wrong ? 

He quickly raises his head and his eyes lock with yours. Is it…is it sadness you can see in his deep blue orbs ? 

-No, no you didn’t do anything. It’s quite the opposite really. It’s just…It’s just that it’s…The day and…I’m being stupid and childish. Sorry. 

He’s about to stand up and go to the bathroom, but you suddenly understand and hold him back. This time, you hug him from behind, because you know he needs it. There isn’t a problem with you. Oh nope. 

It’s father’s day, almost 4 pm, and no trace of your boys. When it was mother’s day, they woke you up early with a magnificent breakfast, and took you out all day…

As you wrap your arms and legs around him, he sighs sadly (and makes you hurt drop, seeing him sad always break you a little, and you just have to do something about it) and the grip he has on your thigh is a bit stronger than his usual soft one. 

Yes. He needs you. 

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ALRIGHT Y’ALL BUCKLE UP BECAUSE, THANKS TO THIS POST ABOUT LANCE, I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST PARALLEL OF ALL TIME

The post ends with the line “it takes a lot of courage to stand up to your friend and your hero like that.”

AND YA’LL

Y

A

L

L

Keith and Lance are Harry and Neville

(more under the cut because this is long as fuck)

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Dating Bobby would include

Originally posted by ygboys-ot11

  • a lot of pet names like every pet name ever invented would be said to you one way or another 
  • babygirl, love, sweetheart, babe, baby, just everything that made your heart all tingly
  • would speak english to you constantly, i mean who wouldn’t love bobby speaking english
  • those friendship-kind-of-feel-skinship
  • the constant arm around your shoulders
  • and puts it around your head and putting you into a headlock
  • but then he chuckled when you’re not giving any restraint to his headlock bc he does this all the time
  • then he would put his head on top of yours and smell your hair 
  • he loveeesssss smelling your hair 
  • and would do it whenever he could i swear to god he would just smile whenever he smells it 
  • and whenever he’s sleeping over at your place he would borrow your shampoo
  • even buying the same one as yours and bring it on tour 
  • bc he said that it reminds him of you
  • wears those musky really masculine body wash and aftershave 
  • and he smells delishus
  • gives you all of his hoodies bc it smells like him 
  • and you’ll give it back to him when it’s starting to lose his smell
  • and he will take the hoodies back on tour because it smells like you
  • ok hold up. sorry but ok this is too intense for me
  • always holding your hand anywhere because he always walks faster than you and he would make you catch up to him
  • and a few pulling and tugging your arms just wait he’ll want to walk everywhere with you 
  • from night markets, malls, walking you to school, parks, everywhere just he’s very active okay 
  • he’s active, in bed 
  • OH NIGHT MARKETS GOSH OR ANY PLACE THAT HAS FOOD STALLS NEXT TO EACH OTHER
  • all the food all the games?!! i mean its such a perfect date for bobby tbh
  • he would buy all this foods for you
  • and shoving them in your mouth first before devouring everything into his 
  • and would buy every single thing he sees bc he loves to eat and so does you
  • like both of you would just eat 24/7 
  • i feel like he would love his girl to eat just as well as he is 
  • so dont you order that fancy salad off the menu bc he just wont and cant have it 
  • and he would play those games and try to win the ridiculous prizes for you 
  • with his child like competitive side lets just imagine
  • and since u guys played all the time and bob is sooooo good at playing games (look at all the vapp guys hes  a downright ace) he would win a lot for you until your rooms will be FILLED with all the stuffs bobby won for you 
  • usually he will win you the really huge dolls, and when you play to win for him it will just be those really small trinkets (bc u suck) that bobby would keep in his room on top of his dresser 
  • and then eat again 
  • and again
  • always carrying tissues everywhere bc that boy cant eat properly to save his life 
  • and he would be whining when you wiped it off with a tissue and not with ur mouth!!!!!!!!!!! OMG
  • he would be so clingy and needy all the time tbh he would be so cute god help me 
  • mornings with bobby would go both ways
  • its either
  • lazy lazy mornings 
  • “babygirl staaayyyy in beeedddd”
  • “babe i want to sleep some more”
  • with that raspy voice?!@&?!
  • and pulls your body back straight to bed 
  • or 
  • he would be such an early bird waking up in the morning and cooking breakfast or eating leftover
  • reheating them in the microwave and not letting it hit 0 secs bcs the sound will wake you up in your sleep
  • he’ll let u sleep but would wake you up when he’s done eating because he’s bored
  • ordering americanos and drinking lots of coffee in general
  • just having strolls around the park with coffee in your hand and his hand in the other
  • ramen date nights!!!!
  • where both of u would just pig out and let ur face be swollen the next day
  • usually occurs when he has concerts and day offs the next after
  • no drama whatsoever in this relationship bc u both r chill af and ure both really secure with ur relationship
  • “well did you get jealous?”
  • “well, no, bcs i got you”
  • OH OH OH 
  • and since he’s really bad at taking care of himself esp his voice due to all the stress and those screaming and rap performances 
  • you would have to FORCE him to drink herbal hot green tea and thats when he hates loves u the most
  • “babe, sirheo” “babe no why it’s too hot” “ah babe too hot!!” “ah why did you make it that hot” “put a lot of honey in" 
  • but would secretly loves it when you’re so intent on making him feel better since he’s always working hard 
  • like bringing food whenever he wants u to and massaging him!!!
  • he would love massages from you and would do the same for u if youre tired 
  • flexes his abs 24/7 
  • and his arms like gOSh i get it ure hot i get it but YOU WOULD LOVE IT 
  • nuzzling into his arms and shoulders 
  • sharing every single thing you own 
  • eVERY LITTLE THING shirts pants god even toothbrushes 
  • whats yours is his whats his is yours
  • like its not even a debate anymore its rlly intense both of u just really really gives your all in this relationship, LITERALLY
  • at first u would be really hesitant to depend so much on him and shares everything
  • but then he would really look into your eyes and drills it into your head that
  • "a lot of things are yours, babe." 
  • and u know that he means it, like his heart is yours, his firsts are yours, he is yours
  • sharing clothes 
  • just imagine his really big oversized shirts worn by you
  • when you go public:
  • both of u would just go everywhere together and being the social butterfly he is, he would run into tons of people and would just proudly introduces you to everyone
  • writes all of his lyrics based on you
  • the sex would be so fucking good 
  • like i mean come on look at him 
  • will be so passionate every single time its just like a switch 
  • but will be pretty vanilla imo
  • will try to make both of you feel good 
  • only calling him "bobby” when you’re mad at him 
  • OR WHEN URE IN BED IT TURNS HIM ON SO MUCH 
  • and when ure mad he will be turned on too bc thats what u call him in bed 
  • so every argument will be solved with sex whats wrong with that
  • its mostly just disagreement or when you’re both frustrated with each other bc ure both very stubborn 
  • frustrations there is just a lot of frustration
  • but he’s your ride or die
  • he will be SO PROTECTIVE and so a BIASED  towards you
  • will defend u till the ends of the earth in front of anyone
  • but thats what he loves most about you, that you’re stubborn
  • and thats what u love most about him the fact that he’s very passionate in everything that he do and he has a strong and clear vision of all his philosophy and choices 
  • so its always fun to see you bicker about the different opinions between the both of you
  • calls him jiwon, babe, baby, bb, bobba, bubba
  • “bobba” how cute :(((
  • a lot of midnight strolls and a lot of eating junk foods 
  • watch tv series together in his bed in his arms with ur legs tangled over each other and nose kisses and eye smiles and just everything cute and fluffy is in bob when he wants to be- ass grabbing in public 
  • “yah! babe!” and he would laugh at your reaction 
  • so you would spank him back 
  • and both of u would have a good laugh
  • matching tattoos, somewhere hidden with only the two of you who knows 
  • carpool karaokes 
  • rap battles
  • and if you’re not korean and you can’t even keep up with half the shit he spits
  • he would freestyle for you in full english so you could rap his songs
  • and probably would write you tons of lazy raps in english and record them 
  • and gives it to you for ur anniversary or birthday
  • plays guitar hero xbox
  • going to church togetherrrr!!!!!  
  • whenever he has the time to
  • bc i feel he would want someone with the same beliefs as him, but would love u nonetheless if ure not
  • sends memes and snapchat funny faces when he’s away on tour
  • can be really romantic if he wants to be, but you’re the kind of girl who loves fun relationship more than the romantic one
  • if you’re not from korea, he would love to travel to your country and learn about the culture
  • i feel like he will be so open to the possibility of dating an international fan
  • “babe, whats this” “uwa whats that” “babe what did u just say” “babe, teach me how to say i love you" 
  • and he would just know what to say i love you and i’m hungry 
  • afterall he would just be so amazing okay
  • if he ended up not to be with one of us please please i beg u with all the kindness in my heart pls pls take care of him
  • because he fucking deserves it 
  • he has one of the best hearts i know out there 
  • and u would not regret dating him bc he’s just really2 good with u and he understands u 
  • and will accept every single flaw within you with such love and compassion
  • and you would do the same thing for him and thats why your relationship will last 
  • bc the both of u really respects each other 
  • and rlly accepts one of the other so it’s easy to forgive one or two things that u guys might have done 
  • ok 
  • im done- let me live- 
  • he’s just the best ok

Originally posted by ygboys-ot11

mean

Originally posted by ikon-global

look 

Originally posted by jiwonsqueen

at this

Originally posted by endlessikon

magical nonsense

Originally posted by hanbi-i

haha yea right im doomed. 

star-anise  asked:

Can you pls write one of the SMH doing fiber arts?

Why yes I can! Have some Frog bonding.


“I’m sure they’ll let me back into Annie’s by now,” Nursey insisted to Chowder as he knocked on Dex’s door. “The sign incident was ages ago.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m sure,” Chowder said vaguely, distracted as he was by a text from Cait.

“It’s open,” Dex called.

Nursey opened the door and stuck his head into Dex’s room. “Hey, bro, you wanna go with me and C to…” He trailed off as he actually registered what he was seeing. “What are you doing?”

Dex was seated cross-legged on his bed, some kind of cloth in one hand and a threaded needle in the other, an open box filled with a rainbow of other threads next to him. He looked down at his lap and then back at Nursey like he was a moron. “Cross-stitch? What does it look like?”

Nursey came the rest of the way into the room so he could get a better look. “I wouldn’t know, man, my sister did ballet and my mom doesn’t do crafty shit.”

Chowder looked up from his phone and followed Nursey in, bouncing over to Dex’s side cheerfully. “How cool! What is it?”

“Uh, a fractal.”

“You can make fractals out of thread?!”

Dex cracked a smile. “Yeah, sure.” He handed the fabric on the hoopy thing over to Chowder, who ran a finger over the surface as he studied it intently.

Nursey pulled out Dex’s desk chair and sat down on it backwards, resting his chin on his folded arms. “Why do you do it?”

Dex shot him a suspicious glance. “Because it’s soothing and methodical and more portable than Legos.”

Keep reading

❝ i can shake everything off as i write; my sorrows disappear and my courage is reborn, ❞  - Anne Frank

time for some recommendation time because i have bookmarked some of my favourites during my hiatus to keep me rejuvenated and quenched and wanna share them with ya’ll♡

i really really love and admire these authors and their incredibly divine writings that just pulled my heartstrings and drowned me in my own ocean of tears. you should have a look and when i mean ‘should’ i mean you MUST because they are insanely good (in my opinion). i’m sure there are way more brilliant writers and stories to discover but then again, there are a billion stars in the night sky and we have all the time in the world to pick one and admire it.

▼please and i mean PLEASE don’t throw any hate, shade or give annoying rude requests of updates to writers who put in effort to rekindle the passion for reading and craft our fantasies and imaginations▲

fic rec update: 16 May

❀❀❀❀❀

@minthusiast
six degrees of separation (yoongi scenario)
he didn’t (multi-member series)
❝ you guys don’t frickin know how much i love her fics and if you can handle cliffhangers then you will enjoy her masterpieces but if you don’t - well prepare some tissues❞

@jungkxook
arranged love (jungkook series)
hiraeth (jungkook series)
❝ art. alyssa is art. that’s all i can say because she is a fucking masterpiece❞

@annyeongs
to earth (yoongi scenario)
listen (taehyung scenario)
punchline (jungkook scenario)
❝ mia’s writing is like getting a glimpse of what heaven seems like because her stories are just exceptionally beautifully written❞

@taesthetes
cerise (yoongi scenario)
mischance (jungkook scenario)
accismus (taehyung series)
oodal (namjoon scenario)
❝ as you can tell, i’m a mega fan of cat’s writings. like no joke. pls read her stories and love her and bless her for such amazing stories like pls she is a sweet gift from heaven i swear❞

@dreamscript
pressure (jimin scenario)
❝ her comical scenarios and plots makes me smile like there is no tomorrow so maybe her amazing writing will do something to you too…its probably black magic…❞

@vixx17andbtsimagines
bts college!au
❝ okay she makes me feel so frickin fluffy with her drabbles like i can just EXPLODE with floor. she is crazy and her imagines are so relatable i just had to put her in my recommendation list❞

@an-exotic-writer
the taste of love (yoongi scenario)
obliviously obviously obvious (jungkook scenario)
❝ if i could, i would just give you her entire masterlist because i swear, missy’s writings can cure every broken soul. she makes me feel like such a disloyal hoe just because her writings for every member are frickin insanely good❞

@heungtanbts
noise (jimin scenario)
❝ main culprit for making me cry over angst because of this scenario. she is really good guys pls go check her out if you wanna good cry❞

@queenjunghoseok
cinderella (hoseok series)
enchanted (jimin series)
❝ jen is one of the first few writers that got me hooked and stimulated my passion for writing. i’ve talked to her before and she is a genuinely nice person. pls give her love for her incredible writing❞

@jjungkooked
better than words (taehyung scenario)
the little things (jungkook scenario)
untimely confessions (seokjin scenario)
❝ kristen’s stories are masterpieces and i’m not kidding you like they are so genuine and deep - deeper and the ocean - and that says a LOT❞

@exoticarmy127
prince charming - love is easy - after all (jungkook series)
laws of motions and attractions (taehyung series)
limited edition (jungkook scenario)
❝ if you guys want a taste of extreme fluff and angst, go to kaye’s because her writings *sigh* i don’t even know anymore. she is just one of the most talented writers i have ever known in my entire existence❞

@your-miss-right
caller number 9 (yoongi series)
salted caramel (hoseok series)
warning labels (hoseok scenario)
felicity (seokjin scenario)
❝ *screaming because thalia is fucking amazing and i love her writings so much* you have no idea how much i admire her writing. its so new and fresh and just something i want to experience and have it screened in a cinema ya know. oh yeah and her edits makes me question my own artistic talent❞

@pjimns
the insanity called love (taehyung scenario)
❝ issy just slays it. she SLAYS it. if she played me she will slay ya'll❞

@yoongsigh
basically her entire text masterlist
❝ cheesy af and lucy’s texts makes me want to puke butterflies and cry rainfalls. partner in crime but likely to be the one to have to save my ass from the cops because i daydream too much in the midst of schemes❞

@inktae
first light (jungkook scenario)
the swirling way of stars (jungkook scenario)
blue orchids (jungkook scenario)
❝ ya’ll…you have no idea how much i love mari and her stories. she makes magic with her words and fantasies come to life with her imagination that is just beyond the universe❞

@sxgah
between the lines (jungkook scenario)
❝ i spent months trying to find this amazing blog who has the amazing fic that reminds me of jodi picoult’s Between The Lines. and trust me, its so beautiful i love it soo much it gets mE SO FLUFFY. kim’s stories are beyond amazing and i’m just nOPE NOT TODAY GURL❞

@gukvory
the devil skates on thin ice (yoongi series)
❝ you all have no fucking clue how amazing ivory is. iv’e been through her past personas and she still strikes me with her flamboyant vocab and outstanding storylines❞

@taechubs
paper hearts (jungkook series)
❝ ERIN NEEDS TO BE STOPPED I REPEAT SHE NEEDS TO BE STOPPED that’s all ❞

@bngtn-blues
iniquitous (jungkook scenario)
❝ idk about you but tina is underrated and i waNT PEOPLE TO LOVE HER WORKS thank you pls. she is new so she doesn’t have that many fics but i’m so excited for new ones because she is just MMHHMMM❞

@jimlingss
rent-a-boyfriend (taehyung scenario)
❝ yo this fic had me and my friends sQUEALING during biology class like i’m so in love with this fic where can i find a boyfriend????? like taehyung???? this fic is enough to stir the butterflies in you ;) ❞

@donewithjeon
petrichor (yoongi scenario)
❝ so so so s o SOOO good and so reALLL and genuine like it gives me raw feelings and i just SIGHHH

@wastednotions
snapstreak (jungkook series)
❝ basically aus + kalice = some crazy cliche fluff shit. though in real life she is an actual ass she is actually really soft for jungkook so thats the only thing i respect of her

❀❀❀❀❀

there is waaaaaaaaaaay more i assure and i’m pretty sure you guys know waaaaaay more. these are my fav scenarios and authors who have truly inspired me:) pls give them all the respect and love they deserve for their hard work. some of them are on hiatus or either really busy but all we can do is give them support and patience♡ will update the fic soon:))
-Q

What Your Fave BNHA Character Says About You:

I got quite some asks a while ago about “What does my fave say about me???” and I wanna answer all of them and also no new chapter which is crushing:

Class 1-A: Alphabetized

Aoyama Yuuga: you have horrible self-esteem issues and cover it up by attracting attention to yourself because you want the attention but have absolutely no idea what to do with it once you have it

Ashido Mina: a loud passionate person with a fondness for dress-up (everyday wear or costumes, it doesn’t matter) and people are shocked to find out your level of nerdiness because like… “you don’t look like a nerd…”

Bakugou Katsuki: a spitfire on the inside and sometimes on the outside. You spicy af and people tell you to tone it down. Was a genius in middle school but then found out about everyone else catching up. Has a SUPER fear of failure.

Hagakure Tooru: A cute little flower who blends into the background but never fear, all that gossip is here! People forget you a lot, but you’re used to it. Gotta keep that positive attitude!!!!

Iida Tenya: People tell you you’re weird a lot and they also tell you you’re annoying but you’re just trying to help. Smart af when it comes to what you know, but pretty clueless otherwise.

Jirou Kyouka: You have that one piece of clothing you love dearly and have owned for years and people are shocked to see you whenever you’re not wearing it. Actual music hoe. *takes out one earbud* whut

Kaminari Denki: Admit it you’re an irl troll face but deep down you’re actually the rarest of pepes. Just wants to be loved by friends but you also want a date to prom so jokingly-for-real ask people out on dates. It hasn’t really worked.

Kirishima Eijirou: You love The Gays™ or are irl gay yourself. You’re an actual cinnamon roll but you’re hella burnt on the inside so you’ve got a spine of steel. You love your friends and aren’t afraid to say it. HUGS FOR EVERYONE

Kouda Kouji: You little animal lover you~ <3 ! Shy and sweet, people tell you that you don’t talk much but you’re just anxious. Will talk about your passions until you pass out but if it’s in front of strangers then NO THANKS

Midoriya Izuku: Actual cinnamon roll just trying your best, you’re smart with what you’re passionate about but that also makes you a giant nerd. You have that one weird little quirk that nobody understands so you hide it a lot. 

Mineta Minoru: You’re goofy and the squad clown but also naive af. Might not be noticeable on the outside but UR A SINNER HARRY. You read way too much fanfiction because actual porn feels weird/ is too much

Ojiro Mashirao: You like to stick to the background but you also want people to notice when you’ve achieved something so you’re stuck in this cycle of “I want this to look good but also original but not too weird but also cool but also…”

Satou Rikkidou: Your resting bitch face almost has yourself fooled but there’s nothing that can comfort you like food and your best bro can. Is really good at cooking. Part of the “Support Everyone But Forgets Yourself” Squad.

Sero Hanta: You come off as harmless but deep down you’re a disgusting memer waiting for the perfect moment to pun and meme. Your health is important, look at this article you printed off just for your friends’ cringe

Shouji Mezou: You’re quiet at first but hella observant so you can tell the moment to open up and let people see how harmless you are on the inside. Gentle soul who only want the best for others. Will kill/die to protect others.

Todoroki Shouto: You’ve been deeply hurt by someone you looked up to and you know you’re still messed up. You’re trying to grow away from the pain but it’s hard. A little wrapped up in your head, you want to love others again.

Tokoyami Fumikage: You know every word to “Welcome to the Black Parade”. You like really cool, dark and edgy things so your inner emo is Strong™. People tell you that you need to cool your chill and warm up. flip them the bird.

Tsuyu Asui: IRL perfect friend, you are the mom friend/ big sis friend of the group who makes sure everyone stays together and doesn’t do stupid shit. At least, doesn’t do stupid shit without you. Pokèmon was a lifestyle, once.

Uraraka Ochako: Looks innocent on the outside but will punch a guy if they step over that very clear line. Friends and family are to be protected at all costs. You’re so cheap, people laugh but in reality you’re scared to spend money. 

Yaoyorozu Momo: Smart af and pretty too, you’re so used to things coming easily to you that you panic as soon as something seems hard. In group projects you’re the one that does 95% of the work. You’re (kinda) ok with this.

Alright, I covered Class 1-A first, but if your fave isn’t on this list, or you wanna look up your other faves, I left it all under the cut!

BONUS:

All Might/ Toshinori Yagi: Actual cinnamon roll trying their best to be a good guardian and lead those who are lost. Is the actual biggest dork around. Tries to be cool but simply… isn’t. We love you anyways. Pls take care of yourself too.

Eraserhead/ Aizawa Shouta: you’re extra salty in need of a nap and still care about everyone around you but still like to fuck with them to show you care. Is a cat person and feels like you can only get along with other cat people.

Keep reading

Oh My My My - X

OH MY MY MY MASTER LIST


SUMMARY: A love story from start to finish.

WARNINGS: language and a little angst

AUTHOR’S NOTE: please don’t hate me part 2 & ½ lmao i promise that after this chapter everything will be like before lol

Enjoy!


Months went by and you couldn’t shake off that night at Tony’s party. You probably shouldn’t have slapped Bucky across the face but he also deserved it. It’s not like you went around and asked him if he even like Dot. He would go crazy if you even asked him.

“(Y/N),” Peter called.

“Huh? What?”

“I asked what toppings you want on the pizza.”

“Oh uh, pepperoni.”

Peter gave you a strange look before continuing the pizza order on the phone. He hung up a couple of seconds later and plopped down on the couch beside you.

Keep reading

friends to lovers!au ❁ svt jun

Masterlist

Guidelines

Request: can i request friends to lovers with jun? thank you

I wasn’t sure if you wanted this as a scenario or an au so I did an au instead! If this isn’t what you wanted, I can rewrite it for you as a scenario (jun loses his chill somewhere in this au omg) (:

Originally posted by zeropathy


  • your mother introduced you to jun while his mother introduced him to you at the age of ten
  • both of you weren’t comfortable with each other at first, it was kind of really awkward
  • neither of you spoke to each other, but jun played the piano for you a lot so he could practice and you wouldn’t be bored being alone
  • the first time you guys had a real conversation was when you both were twelve
  • INCREDIBLE i know, how could u not yet have an actual conversation with someone you’ve known for two years
  • well
  • u both managed to do just that
  • ALSO you know what being 12 years old means
  • UR MOTHER SIGNED U UP FOR CLUBS
  • a judo club, really. you had no idea what the hell was going on and you just saw a tall man’s naked cHEST oh my god what the fukc can he please put his uniform on PROPERLU
  • junhui’s mother signed him up for wushu
  • which kind of sucks cause like
  • less time hanging out with ur best buddy
  • but it’s okay in the end because now you can use judo for self defense and jun can probably kick someone’s ass
  • going to school together was also really fun
  • you two both rode bikes to school and back
  • the kids in your class thought you two were dating but ?? no ?? have u ever heard of cooties??, gross
  • plus you two are only twelve the kids can chill
  • fast forward to when u two are fourteen years old (rebellious stage as some ppl call it)
  • jun joined the same clubs you did at school even though sometimes those clubs sometimes clashed with his piano and wushu lessons
  • “jun are you sure you want to join informational technology with me?”
  • “UHM yes. i want to learn about computers too, leave me be.”
  • “i’m taking care of the library for volunteer hours. don’t you have piano lessons today?”
  • “there’s a recital tonight. i’d rather hang out with you than play jazz music for gross adults.”
  • jun’s mother came into the library right after that
  • she got pissed when she heard what he said LOL HE’S SCREWED
  • once jun hit puberty he got HELla sassy
  • even u couldnt handle it
  • when you were practicing your judo with jun he got obnoxious and kept talkin g bULLSHIT
  • so u performed an uchi mata on him
  • he was on the floor for seven minutes
  • “keep ur mouth shut little boy”
  • “…u hit me in the balls … . ..”
  • you threw an icepack at him after a few minutes
  • “talk shit. get hit.”
  • his voice changed, wasn’t rlly a surprise to both of u since it wasn’t noticeable at first but it became gradually lower as the weeks flew by
  • he got tall
  • REALLY TALL
  • ur both sixteen now and fukc what thef uck jun can u please shrink a little
  • (depending on reader size, difference isn’t much OR IS VERY MUCH)
  • jun quit piano. he was a bit too advanced for his teachers and he got bored; they didn’t give him difficult enough shit to play
  • he still practiced wushu, but didn’t go to those lessons anymore either
  • he did get a job though, good for hi m
  • he took work days on tuesday, wednesday, and saturday so you two still had plenty of time to hang out!!
  • jun was always around you whether you were taking care of the library, putting together a desktop computer in I.T. or practicing your judo
  • you both were stuck together like glue
  • your parents thought you two looked good together
  • . .. u two weren’t sure of ur feelings??
  • MOR ELIKE
  • YOU’RE OBLIVIOSU TO JUN BEING REALLY OBVIOUS THAT HE LIKES U
  • like he even tries hard to look good for you even if it’s just you two casually hanging out
  • he styles his hair, picks out the best outfit that you would like and puts on a subtle amount of cologne
  • dude he’s liked you ever since you two became teenagers
  • but since you two are nearly adults, he’s trying to make it really obvious that he’s attracted to you
  • because he knows how you are when a boy likes you
  • you don’t have any idea
  • you just think they’re being nice and you end up being friends with them instead of becoming someone’s girlfriend
  • he liked that about u though
  • cause ur cute and practically innocent to crushes and dating
  • so one day, jun decided to give you a bouquet of flowers
  • “aw, thank you! my mom would love these!”
  • “yA these flowers are for you not you R MOTHER”
  • he grabbed the flowers from you and grumpily stomped inside your house to put them in a vase before going back to where  you stood
  • “i like you, okay? have you really not noticed a thing all these years?”
  • “ ,, . no? ?”
  • jun: internally screaming
  • keeps his cool
  • a RE YOU KIDING ME
  • nevermind
  • “CALM DOWN i like u too gosh ur so annoyin g honestly”
  • “!!?!??as a friend right u like me as a fRIENd you obLIVious sHTI”
  • you didn’t answer him right away and you gave him half an hour to calm down
  • UR MOTHER FOUND U TWO MAKIG OUT ON THE COUCH AN HOUR LATER
  • so thats something
  • your mothers are dramatic
  • they both threw a party once they discovered u two were together
  • (so tht is also something)
  • now you two are inseperable
  • your friends seem to always find jun stuck to your side or your back
  • he loves giving you backhugs you’re so comfy
  • when you’re working on something in your bedroom like a project for an extracurricular class, he’s either pressed against your side or you’re on his lap
  • he loves burying his face in the crook of your neck
  • he rlly likes sleeping next to you too because you make him feel warm
  • his kisses are either short and sweet or ,,, dirty
  • jun finds it cute that whenever he goes in for a kiss, you always shyly lean away from him
  • it’s not intentionaL but it happens
  • his arms are almost always around your waist
  • u can’t push him away u just can’t
  • the honeymoon phase weighs heavy on him
  • but as you two get older he gets less affectionate but is still as loving
  • he wouldn’t be as into PDA anymore, he really likes to touch you and kiss you when you’re in private
  • you both are a really dorky couple
  • juN loves you so much
  • he pats your head more often than not
  • doesn’t mind carrying u
  • he thinks ur tiny even though you probably aren’t
  • takes u out on dates that are fun, but relaxing
  • mostly just takes you out to a casual restaurant or a library cafe
  • he loves u and will take care of u pls treat him with love and kindness

Originally posted by animequeenn13

A Guide To VAV

VAV – Very Awesome Voice

Soooo since there were some people who did like my idea of making a guide like this I thought ‘cool let’s do it!‘
I hope this can help people finde out about them and maybe motivate some of you do give them a listen and some love!

Ok so first some general facts;

They had their debut in 2015 (still noobs) with 6 members and are under AQ Entertainment, which is now A-Team Entertainment. I’d like to point out here, that this company provides ENGLISH SUBTITLES for us (!!!!) which is pretty damn awesome.The group underwent (is that a word) a couple of lineup changes which I will explain further when I come to the members individually.
A Fun fact: they sometimes have exceptionally loud MALE fanchants which is hilarious to me.

Fanclub: Vampz (debut concept was vampires. Yeeeh.)

We’ll get to the number one most important part now

THE MEMBERS (in order of age)

1.       St. Van – The Leader

Originally posted by 1vav

  • Real Name: Lee Geumhyuk
  • 91 liner
  • Main vocal (POWER vocal) / Leader
  • A father
  • Probably speaks better Chinese than Jacob
  • Loves Jacob; votes Jacob by default
  • tries hard and gets dragged for it by the younger members
  • it was revealed that he likes to watch girl group dances (he said it’s because he needs to learn them to be able to show something at fanmeetings and such. Yeah sure bro me too.)
  • has that hella loud HAHAHA kinda laugh
  • roommates with Baron
  • embarrassed. Generally.
  • Completely demolished ACE birthday cake with the help of ZeHan once
  • Likes cars
  • Has sleeve-like tattoo on his shoulder/upper arm

2.       Baron

Originally posted by yerikim

  • Real Name: Choi Chunghyeob
  • 92 liner
  • Vocal
  • Fake Maknae 0.1 // he’s very cute
  • Known for serenading a male fan with ‘I need a boy’
  • Super pretty // sweet voice // good dancer // funny –> Real idol material right here
  • Apparently has ‘apple hips’ which are ‘popular’ among the members. Whatever that may mean…
  • Likes photography and making films
  • Plays games first thing in the morning
  • Talkative
  • A sunshine // scammed the company into giving him an extra allowance of 1000won in a game and spend it to buy fruit for the members
  • there’s a 26 second long video of him brushing his teeth on A-Teams official youtube channel

3.       ACE

Originally posted by iloveziont

  • Real Name: Jang Wooyoung
  • 92 liner
  • Vocal
  • A Mom // currently raising Ayno and Jacob
  • Probably dating Ziu atm
  • asks members for reactions when he does things
  • Practices phonation /articulation in his sleep (super noisy, even people in nearby rooms can hear him)
  • Talks a lot
  • Wears sunglasses in the pool aka. will fight you in the pool while wearing sunglasses (swag is better than actually seeing your surroundings)
  • ‘I look thinner with my clothes on’ kinda person // he’s ripped
  • Really likes sport and working out
  • The groups elected MC
  • He always seems to know what he’s doing
  • Covered Winners ‘Fool’ and it’s amazing his vocals are super beautiful

4.       Ayno

Originally posted by 1vav

  • Real Name: Noh Yoonho
  •  96 liner
  • rapper
  • Participated in the survival show No.Mercy in which Monsta X was formed, but got eliminated in the final rounds
  • Joined the group as a new member early this year
  • Voted to be the cutest by VAV
  • Fake Maknae 0.2
  • Part time grill master (Roasts his members)
  • *Looks at the camera like he is on the office*
  • Skilled dancer
  • Writes his own rap
  • First reaction after seeing Jacob cry was to lie himself horizontal on his lap as a form of comfort or idk that’s the kinda friend he is
  • in charge of meme

5.       Jacob

Originally posted by fy-underratedgroups

  • Real Name: Zhang Peng
  • 96 liner
  • Sub-Rapper / sub-vocal
  • Chinese
  • Super introverted // worries his members cause they want to share his hard times but they feel like they can’t. What a family T-T
  • Manly manTM
  • Had a complete mental breakdown once with ugly sobbing and all after receiving a video letter from VAV
  • Voted himself visual of the group
  • Nickname ‘Cob’
  • Doesn’t talk ever
  • understands props half of what is said, but is always nodding along
  • Idk but I think he’s rich he always wears expensive looking clothes
  • In charge of abs and keeping a straight face at all times // has super cute smile actually
  • ‘I stream ‘Venus’ as soon as I get up in the morning’
  • Accidentally made out with ZeHan at pops in seoul

6.       Lou

Originally posted by armurx

  • Real Name: Kim Hosung
  • 96 liner
  • rapper
  • New member
  • Very confident
  • Super deep voice
  • Not having any of anyone’s shit (pls let ur members live)
  • Maybe a bit mean
  • Pretends to be manly
  • Wants to try acting (he is in fact an acting major)
  • Finds  lot of Joy in making fun of Ziu
  • Gets lots of affection in return that he absolutely really DOESN’T WANT
  • His most precious possession is the refrigerator
  • According to him his closest celebrity friend is James Bond
  • ‘which place would you like to visit where you have never been?’ ‘my house’

7.       Ziu

Originally posted by jang-peng

  • Real Name: Park Heejun
  • 97 liner
  • Vocal // I love his vocals byE
  • New member / joined together with Ayno and Lou
  • No homo? Yes homo. (no video goes by without him trying to kiss at least ONE of his members)
  • King of being fake touched and overreaction
  • Always gets exposed
  • Raids the dorm refrigerator at around 5/6AM
  • Eats while being asleep
  • Suffers a lot from the maknae position
  • Currently dating ACE probably
  • In fact roommates with ACE
  • Ended up being my bias somehow
  • a cheerful fella

_______________________________________

Former Members // Hiatus 

I will keep this short since the post is already long AS FUCK and while these members DO appear in many of their past videos, ‘advertising’ them here wouldn’t do much good since you’re not going to see them with the group from now on

Xiao

ZeHan

  • Lee Seungmin
  • Vocal
  • 94 liner
  • Left to pursue a career as an actor
  • Was my bias why must u do dis to me

GyeoUl

  • Jung Un
  • Vocal
  • 95 liner
  • Left to pursue a career as producer

____________________________________

That was it so far, but I will put their MVs under a cut!

I also decided to put pictures of the former members under there too, since it would be good to be able to recognize them in the video, but I could only find really big pictures and I don’t want to make the post too big >.>

They also have a kind of reality show which is called What’S Up? VAV and it’s very fun so I defintely recomment watching it!! Here is a season 2 playlist

Thanks for making it until here and Please stan VAV

Originally posted by babywoon

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anonymous asked:

Ohhh your hc are adorable! If you have time, can I request the RFA being with an mc who has dazzling lucky smile and everytime she smiles something good happens? Like, the next hour Zen gets a cool role, Yoosung passed an exam, 707 ate a salad and enjoyed it, etc lol. Pls take your time :3

Thank you, anon! I’ll do my best!
*This is a very cute request!!*

I’ve been in a huge Vanderwood-loving mood so I added him I ‘ m s o r r y


Yoosung:

  • You are the cutest, stop he’s gonna die
  • Your smile is already his favorite thing to see
  • But is also carries some sort of magical power with it???
  • Are you an LOLOL hero in disguise??
  • If he’s sitting in class and he sneaks on his phone, he usually asks you to text him a picture of you smiling
  • “I’ve sent you three already!”
  • “Just in case!!”
  • Before every LOLOL match, he needs to see you smile!!

Zen:

  • He’s convinced you’re hiding some sort of crystal ball that he doesn’t know about
  • Or that maybe your parents were magical oracles that passed their magic onto you?
  • He thinks you’re an actual angel sent to bless him with love and good luck???
  • “Zen don’t overwork yours-” “Hey! I heal like a monster and you’ve got that gorgeous lucky grin?? I’ll be fine, jagiya ~” 
  • Yeah and then when he comes home with his arm in a cast, he doesn’t get to see that smile because YOU TOLD HIM.
  • *Unless he pouts and guilt-trips you into letting him*
  • *then….maybe*

Jaehee:

  • When you guys first met, she was really reallllyy skeptical
  • A magic/lucky smile? Eh..Coincidences 
  • But those coincidences seem to be happening a lot
  • She never really starts to believe it
  • However
  • Every now and then, she’ll ask to see you smile and if you’re like “….it’s lucky isn’t it?”
  • and immediately denies and proceeds to tell you that it’s…just…because…you know- can you just please smile 
  • Usually, on top of seeing your smile, she takes a night to pray and hope that she doesn’t have to watch Elizabeth the next day
  • “It’s no use..”
  • The next day rolls around and oh my god it worked?????

Jumin:

  • In the chatroom, before you guys got together, he thought it was ridiculous
    707: Jumin!!! Trust in the lucky smile!!!
    Jumin Han: I don’t believe in such nonsense.
  • Not yet you don’t, Jumin
  • Once you’re actually living with him though, he starts to see what everyone’s talking about
  • What you’re talking about
  • so one day he just pops up in the chatroom like
  • Jumin Han: I am starting to sense a pattern here.
  • *Zen likes to say it’s all BALONEY but only because he’s jealous that Jumin gets all the luck and he gets none?? Why does Jumin deserve it more than he does??* 

Seven:

  • “MY HONEY IS A WIZARD!”
  • “Let me see that beautiful face, honey!!! Those shiny teeth! Maybe I won’t get so much work, today~”
  • Saeyoung…..uses so much flattery just to see it
  • Sometimes you wonder if it’s actually about the luck instead of just wanting to see your grin
  • “Wait, so if you smirk, then does something magically naughty happen?”
  • Magically naughty.
  • Magically.
  • Naughty.
  • He sort of has a point but at the same time you wanna smack him over the head with a thick roll of newspaper because oh my god he’s ridiculous??

Vanderwood: 

  • “Hey, did you know I have a lucky smile?”
  • “That’s..not possible-”
  • But then you grin at him
  • and holy shit the heaven gates have opened????
  • He has to double check himself, his cheeks all red from blushing, turn away, proceed to occupy his attention with something else because if he keeps looking at you then he might just pass out
  • “I-It doesn’t matter how nice it is. Anything like that is merely a coincidence..N-Now go do something and stop bothering me!! Go..k-keep yourself busy..”
  • You’re not offended because whenever you do something like this, he gets sheepish quicker than you could recite his full name and it is so cute and so obvious no matter how hard he tries to hide it

anonymous asked:

the wedding question again but with dirkjake 👀

EVERYONE IS GRINNING LIKE MANIACS. Except Dirk who mostly looks like he is going to die. But in a good way. Mostly. Finally this domino falls. It has been such a long goddamn time coming. They get married on the island b/c of course they do. Jane won’t stop fiddling around with their suits, which btw, it is way too hot for. Jake is wearing one of those horrible suit outfits with shorts instead of pants. Jane is despairing to herself over this as she futzes with Jake’s boutonniere. Roxy is doing the same with Dirk except she’s enabling his terrible decisions b/c it’s fucking hilarious and it’s his wedding anyhow who cares wear what you want nahhhhhhh u look great ur very handsome *pats ur cheek* 

Jane takes one look at dirk trying to get away with wearing his shades at his wedding and just Looks at him. The Danger Look. John tries to argue in defense of the shades because god damn it it’s hilarious but Jane is not putting up with that for even half of one second sorry

Dave is determined to just be cool and wing everything flawlessly but whoops he works on a playlist for months and bolts up in the middle of the night in the days before the event like WHAT IF I FORGET– (he doesn’t forget anything and does great) (but no one misses the way his voice wavers a bit during his heavily irony laden best man speech)

Meanwhile Karkat is Jake’s best man and everyone expects his speech to be just as ironic as Dave’s with all the emotion carefully encased in six layers of denial but instead it’s just really nice and sweet and everyone is shocked and Jake is like holy shit you really do like me and immediately upon finishing the speech karkat rips it into little pieces and eats it, we will never speak of this again and by the way your shorts look STUPID like your STUPID FACE

Jake asks Jade to officiate it and she does so enthusiastically with the power vested in her as a literal god and also technically the captain of a giant golden ship. Rose and Kanaya arrive in absolutely fuckin’ bangin gowns and Kanaya is preening like yes finally I consider myself an Expert on this ceremonial endeavor and then she takes one look at the grooms and what theyre wearing and is like WHAT IS THIS. ROSE. HAVE THE RULES CHANGED. PLEASE TELL ME THE RULES HAVE NOT CHANGED THIS IS TERRIBLE ON MULTIPLE LEVELS. Rose is attempting to soothe her distress while simultaneously work in as many eyebrow waggles @ dirk as humanly possible. she is so smug. dirk is dying

Callie has discovered flower girls were/are a thing in some ceremonies and has volunteered herself, dirk and jake are like uhhhhhhhh obviously we arent gonna disappoint CALLIE do what you want and so Callie just covers the entire area in like flower petals, confetti, small hard candies and some small hard candy wrappers shhhhh she got too excited everyone pretends not to notice those. Terezi stands in back, arms crossed, eyes narrowed, she is outwardly Disgusted at how soft everyone has gotten. everyone is getting married. unbelievable. how many of these must I endure

Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Bride [J-Hope]

Pairing: Hoseok x Reader
Genre: Fluffity fluffity fluff it’s all fluff and also bad humor
Word Count: 3320
Description: Who knew blind dates could go so RIGHT?

Author’s Note: wahey somehow all my latest fics have been hobi fics…coincidence? i think not. ANYWAYS it’s my faves birthday and i just love him so much so i avoided all my work and everything to write this i mean iw ould have avoided work anyways but whaTERVER THE POINT IS THAT I LOVE HIMA LOT A LOT A LOT i hope he has the nicest day and he knows that he is amazing and beautiful on the inside and the out and that he eats a lot of cake and gets a lot of compliments and presents..he is just so lovely..i love him sosososo much…,,,, now pls..enjoy my bad humor fic

“It’s not like I’m the bride,” you mutter, wedging your phone between your ear and your shoulder as you pick at a knot in your hair, making a face to yourself in the mirror as you feel how rough and matted your hair is. Your head is killing you, and all you want is to go back to bed, but apparently cake tasting is more important that you feeling like absolute death, and “Jesus, [Name], you knew we were going to choose a cake today, so I don’t give two shits about your stupid hangover and how you brought it on your own incompetent-at-drinking ass, but you are coming unless you want me to scream in your ear” so you’d just need to pop an aspirin (or, like, six) before you left.

“I know you’re not the bride, but I am, and I want all my bridesmaids to have a date.” You sigh, and Jiyeon tuts on the other end of the call. “Also you put yourself down with a plus one, and we’ve already set all the tables,” she whines.

You drop the length of knotted hair, and grab your hair in handfuls instead, shoving it into a messy, drooping knot, and picking up your toothbrush. “That was before my horrible, dreadful, bad breakup with my shitty, cheating, asshat of a boyfriend you, my dear, dear friend, promised to never mention, remember?

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