but really tho i am so lonely im on here by myself


So I had a weird idea one day in a McDonalds so i decided to write all of it down (im going to draw content for it later on 👌👌🔥🔥)

Heads up if you’re uncomfortable with cisswap AUs because this AU is definitely one
(and unnecessary cursing im sorry i have no filter)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

i saw ur post about chris evans and pls tell me u have one about aidan turner as well

listen my buddy, my pal, I have a lot of feelings about this question ok. aidan turner is like fcking international man of mystery fucking master of disguise, I don’t even know who I’m looking at half the time. he has so many looks??? I’ve never seen anything like it

lets start with this pretentious looking bastard. he looks like someone who takes you to an art gallery on the first date but not like a fun art gallery, this one is like some fundraiser he had to go to and needed a date so he didn’t look like a loser so he asks you to go with him and you agree cause damn ok you would hit that but when you’re there he has no idea what he’s talking about and he’s bullshitting about impressionism and shit talking the wine that they picked and how it doesn’t go with the cheese and you’re like ommgggg what have i done, but you sleep with him anyways and tell your friends about how he was a total douche but you keep his number saved as “pretentious art hoe” and you always agree to be his date 

then there’s this guy who looks like he took one psych class and now sits around trying to diagnose all of his friends. he drinks too much coffee and hangs out at mom and pop coffee shops cause he can’t give his money to starbucks and you’re fine with that except he also keeps asking you to look over his final papers and you realize that he doesn’t do any of his work himself but other than that he’s a good guy and listens to a lot of music and you’re down with that

look at this shit here tho, he looks like a guy who rides motorcycles and cancels half of your dates and when you go over to his house theres empty take out containers on the counter and on the coffee table and someone elses underwear on the floor and a guitar on the couch and you just keep telling yourself that it’s fine, everything is fine because jesus fucking christ no one should be allowed to look like this so you just suck up the shittyness and tell yourself that you do not have any feelings for him but sometimes at night he sings to you and you realize that this whole thing was a mistake but you’re along for the ride anyways because he’s also a good cook but he just keeps too many fucking secrets from you 

and then there’s this guy. total casual, he’s your bros bro, the broiest. he calls everyone bruv but would be ready to punch someone in an instant. he really only wears plain tshirts and he just looks like he would not put up with your shit and you are down for that 

and then he looks like a fucking owner of some fishing business in a small town off the coast of ireland but he never really goes out on the sea himself but his business is really successful and he really just hangs out in his house dressed up all nice and sometimes goes down to the pub and the whole town knows who he is but he stays really lowkey and everyone just talks about how lonely he looks like he lost someone at sea once and maybe he’s just waiting for her to come back

and then sometimes he looks like the second coming of jesus and he’s the guy you would sleep with and not tell anyone because of how fucking greasy he is and you end up calling him the greasy j and you say you don’t like how dirty he is but you secretly love it because he’s just a kind gentle soul deep down and always gives to charity and keeps adopting animals from the shelter 

sometimes he looks more like a supermodel than an actor. he looks like he just got done doing a stint in like the bahamas, his skin is v tan and his hair is lighter and super curly. like if you saw him walking down the street you would be like I am in the presence of someone important. it looks like he has a good modeling career tho, like he jetsets off to milan and paris a lot and he doesn’t really talk to anyone because deep down inside he’s like a tortured artist and no one really understands him but like you would totally be down for understanding him if you catch my first 

???????? wolverine???????????????? wtf is this sons of anarchy bullshit??????

struggling art student aesthetic but he’s traveling the world

and sometimes he’s the smolest little irish sweet potato who trips over red carpet ropes, smiles too much, and laughs nervously and I just do not get it it all 

Teen Wolf Insanity.
  • Lydia: Let me just figure out this entire code to the dead pool using my intelligence and banshee powers that I inherited after I survived a bite from a alpha werewolf and then realized I was supernatural as I was being strangled yet I still survived that too. I have a genius IQ and managed to basically figure out everything code/death related ever while battling mental illness and coping with the fact that I am a woman who can predict death while STILL managing to keep a perfect GPA.
  • Idiots: But lol you were mean to stiles in season one and you wear to much makeup #Lolimatrueteenwolffan
  • Allison: Let me just me a flawless queen who slays everyone yet still manages to keep a near perfect GPA while coping with the fact that my parents are hunters while being a badass archer while COPING WITH THE BRUTAL DEATH OF MY MOTHER AND AUNT and then MYSELF dying to save my friends.
  • Dicknobs: But lol you are to assertive and you fashion sense kinddddda sucks ass.
  • Kira: Let me just be flawless and be really smart and coping with high school issues while I simultaneously find out that my mom is 900 years old and that I myself am a ancient Japanese myth WHILE ALSO being a badass with a katana and also be actually amazingly supportive of my bf.
  • Trolls: You Asian tho. And like you're only here cause Allison like died. #allisonsasianreplacement
  • Malia: Let me just cope with the death of my whole family and let me just cope with the fact that I am adopted and that my father is CRAZY and my mother is a assassin while integrating back into society after NINE YEARS as a coyote and have to deal with ALGEBRA while still managing to not be put down a grade.
  • Actual Morons: But lol um you so dumb tho, go back to the forest you have no purpose. #Coyotebitch
  • Hayden: Let me just work illegally at a gay bar to pay off my hospital bills so my sister who earns average wage dosent have to.
  • Dickheads: why she so angry? Is she a lesbian or something? #Feministssmell
  • Bradeen: Let me just be a actual assassin yet still has a heart who can literally shoot a gun while riding a motorcycle and can survive a CLAW TO THE NECK.
  • Slugs: we can't trust you. AND FUCK OFF. #Derekismine
  • Scott: Let me just show my emotions and express myself while simultaneously trying to keep my whole pack alive while also watching people die including one my best friends while also opening my mind up to a ACTUAL DEMON yet still managing to be a kickass leader.
  • Certified Willywagers: PUUUUUSSSSSSY. YOU PROBS SUCK DIIIIIICK. #scottisafaggot
  • Theo: Let me just be a lying little shit as I brake this man's hand while I work for the main villains and then I rip a innocent guys neck out then let me just blackmail stiles then let me just be evil and disloyal and try to get in Malias pants cause IM SO HOT, LOVE MEEEEEEE.
  • Gender and race stereotypes still apply to a racially and female friendly show like teen wolf? People, five words.
  • Lydia is a genius, Malia is powerful, Kira is a badass, Bradden is beautifully deadly, Allison is heroic, Scott has feelings, Derek has a big heart, Isacc is lonely, Stiles is sad.
  • Anyway. Have a nice day. : 3
  • in one of those rare moods where i feel distinctly and inescapably good about every single thing in my life 
  • made this garland of pop-poms to hang above my fireplace before remembering that i don’t have a fireplace. still very much into it.
  • i think i’ve grown another two inches this summer and im suddenly too tall for 100% of my dresses
  • i get payed tomorrow!! and im gonna treat myself to a beautiful lamp from anthropologie which sounds silly but is absolutely not silly at all. 
  • filling etsy orders and listening to folk music and drinking coffee and occasionally stretching 
  • i work tonight from 5 to close which is only a 4 hour shift and actually i love those little tiny shifts where i get the chance to like make a couple of sales and drink some coffee and do my thing with closing the register and all, and im home by 10pm !
  • still dog sitting / house sitting which i’ve discovered that i love bc it’s money just for hanging with dogs and sleeping in a giant empty house which is somehow very comforting and nice
  • im so excited about my future! idk i just have this unshakable feeling like maybe it’s gonna be tuf and maybe i’ll be broke/lonely/in-over-my-head for a long time, but i feel like it’ll all be one big adventure 
  • when i get in these good moods i also have a sudden surge of passion for books like it’s so giant i can’t explain it i almost love books so much that i can feel it as an acute physical pain? like my stomach kind of hurts and i almost start to cry, which i know sounds melodramatic but wow i was born to read books and talk about books ! wow ! 
  • im really proud of myself more than anything bc for a while there in high school it looked like i wasn’t gonna be OK but here i am! im doing so much better than anyone would have expected and im working so much harder than i would’ve thought i could and i’m taking action and moving swiftly in the direction i wanna move in and im  putting it all together and even tho sometimes i feel very OVERWHELMED and STRESSED and DEVASTATED i always manage alright! i always hear that life just goes downhill from the minute you’re born and life is nothing but suffering etc. but i dont think that’s true for everyone i think we have a responsibility to put out good energy and to trust in the universe, like to trust that the universe makes no mistakes and that most bad things are good in the long-term-big-picture. this kind of blind optimism tends to be annoying a suffocating to most people but im not sorry. 
  • i hope everyone else is in a good mood too i love you!!! 

anonymous asked:

Hello! I'm sorry for bothering, but firstly I would like to thank you for your amazing work - I just love it to the bones! And secondly, I'm really interested in your Superman AU - what is exactly going on? Will there be any more information about what is going on? Thank you very much!!

You are so nice anon… ( ´༎ຶㅂ༎ຶ`)

Keep reading

hi so i hope u enjoy the banner i made it myself – how many ppl put their face on their banner???? more than i can think of probably.

anyway i hit 30k yesterday and that’s absolutely crazy!! like when i started my blog almost 3 years ago i never even imagined i’d get to 100 followers and now i have more followers than people in the town i grew up in (it’s literally double wowowow) so that’s truly amazing tbh

oh yeah i’m just gonna thank some cool youtubers even though theyre not gonna see it but w/e it’s the thought that counts

obviously @danisnotonfire​ and @amazingphil are here first because without them idk what i’d do tbh which sounds terrible but when my grandma passed away i was super sad and depressed bc i was so close to her and then i started watching their videos and they made me smile like for real for the first time in months and now my life is dedicated to these two nerds and i couldn’t be happier about it i love them a lot and they’ll always have a special place in my heart and that was cheesy sorry

@benjpierce thank u so much for being so creative and making me smile and your videos are honestly hilarious and original and ur like one of my favorites and u just keep bein u, u lil flop. (also the highlight of my year was when u dragged me about my tater tots tbh)

@doddleoddle thank you for making me smile. when i am sad i find myself listening to absolutely smitten bc it always cheers me up no matter what because u always look so happy in it and it seems like ur smile never leaves in that video and u sound so happy and it’s my go to video when i’m sad tbh and youre so talented and beautiful and youre the reason i started learning ukulele and yeah i love u lots


i have met so many great people on here and i guess now is this time to recognize them!! thank you for following me & i love you so much :’)

under the cut imma write cute lil messages for everyone !! if you’re not on here it’s either bc i couldn’t think of anything to write for you or i forgot you but there are sO many ppl on here also keep in mind i love everyone so uh yeah check out my blogroll if you’re looking for hella cool blogs to follow

italics = irl friends

Keep reading

when you get catfished
  • Dude: ur so beautiful queen
  • Bae: aww sweet :)
  • Dude: i'm being serious, you're the greatest thing to every happen to me and i love you so much
  • Bae: haha same :)
  • Dude: you've changed my life for the better. you've made me the happiest man on earth. i want to live my life with you forever, queen
  • Bae: nice :)
  • Sister: *rudely bursts into room* Are you still talking with that catfish?
  • Dude: She's not a catfish!
  • Sister: Her facebook photo is a stock photo. It has a Getty Images watermark on it.
  • Dude: Has it ever occurred to you that perhaps she put the watermark on her own photo so nobody would steal it from her to catfish other people?
  • Sister: That's... just... what?
  • Dude: You're jealous because you don't have anyone who loves you like my bae does.
  • Sister: I'm not jealous of you. You're miserable. You don't have a job. Your room looks and smells like shit. You haven't been outside in like two months. Hate to break it to you little brother, but you're a fucking mess.
  • Dude: I may be a mess, but at least I'm not as horrible a sister as you are!
  • Sister: ...You're not my sister.
  • Dude: Good, I'm glad. *slams bedroom door shut*
  • Sister: *under her breath* He's so damn hopeless.
  • *sister's cellphone vibrates*
  • Bae: *via text* u should back off :)
  • Sister: Who is this and how did you get my number?
  • Bae: u shouldnt mess with things u dont understand im more powerful than u can ever comprehend :)
  • Sister: LOL? Excuse me? Are you trying to be threatening in a text message? You don't scare me, whoever you are. I've dealt with worse from stalkers.
  • Bae: im no stalker u bitch no one wants to stalk u because ur pussy is ugly and has gross meat flaps on it i am all encompassing and all powerful u r just a cockroach and u should stop obsessing over wat ur brother does becauses its kind of creepy and sad also i fucked ur boyfriend and ur dad both of whom complimented me on my pert genitalia :)
  • Sister: You're completely deranged.
  • Bae: deranged or not its true that i am an almighty being with worshipers across dimensions they love me because i represent the whole i am an amalgamation of all that is great and all that is awful and i am also them and i have great tits and a firm ass and over 1 million followers on insta who recognize me as the full cycle :)
  • Sister: Yup, completely deranged. BLOCKED. *heads back to her room, lies in her bed, and yawns* I can't believe my brother, honestly. Getting involved with a such a completely maniac. I hope he gets it through his head that he's being manipulated sooner or later. I actually feel bad for the pathetic guy.
  • Sister: *dozes off* My dream world is so comfortable. No brother. Not catfish. Just me and a realm of infinite possibilities.
  • Bae: actually im here :)
  • Sister: Fuck, why am I dreaming of you.
  • Bae: i told u im all encompassing im everything even your dreams im even u to some extent :)
  • Sister: Your weird god complex is boring.
  • Bae: tru tru im no god tho if i was a god id be spreading myself thin... u kno most people arent aware of me until someone else they kno meets me and then i become them and theyre all me and im all them :)
  • Sister: I have no clue what you're talking about.
  • Bae: hmmm i guess what im tryna say is that theres no getting rid of me now we should date :)
  • Sister: I don't want to date you.
  • Bae: lets be siblings im ur brother now :)
  • Sister: I don't want to be siblings with the person who just asked me out. That's weird.
  • Bae: okay then im u now :)
  • Sister: No, you're not!
  • Bae: too late :)))))
  • Sister: Nope!
  • Bae: no nopes matter ive already overtaken your entire social circle bye bitch :)
  • Sister: Overtaken my social circle?
  • Sister: What did she mean by that?
  • Sister: I feel so lonely now.
  • Sister: I really wish
  • Sister: I had some clue
  • Sister: Of what is happening
  • Sister: Because I feel so distant now
  • *for months and months it propagates itself as the sister until who the sister was no longer matters*
  • Dude: *texting his sister, teary eyed* you were right! im fucking miserable!
  • Sister: :?
  • Dude: my gf, she broke up with me she said things got weird and then her account just disappeared so i cant even talk to her anymore and i feel like garbage and i just want to die
  • Sister: sounds lame :/
  • Dude: i think you were right about everything you said about her all those months ago! i think she was just using me for something but i don't know what.
  • Sister: mmm :/
  • Dude: i don't know what to do anymore, you're all that i have left, but I can barely leave my room without feeling like an idiot.
  • Sister: sucks :/
  • Dude: do you think that maybe we can talk later about stuff idk i just need to speak to someone face to face and i cant face mom and dad they don't even care.
  • Sister: idk im busy u know work and school and stuff :/
  • Dude: oh okay, but like text me when you're free i'm sorry i've been so distant and like a complete dickhead all year.
  • Sister: no problem hope u feel better :/
  • *his sister's room had been unoccupied for all those months*
  • *she had been left in a world of dreams as her reality was now much like the faultless smile of a stock image model*