but pronouns are hard

2017 needs to be the year that cis people stop complaining about how hard a trans person’s transition is for them. it’s not always easy to remember a new name or to adjust to using different pronouns, but i can guarantee that if you think the transition is hard, it’s a hell of a lot harder for the person actually transitioning, and i want to see more cis people being mindful of that instead of making the situation about themselves and their own feelings 

Red flags to look 4 if ur a trans person dating a cis

• telling everybody your name but ur partner asking “I can still call u [dead name] right???”
• when taking about dysphoria and surgery and they say “don’t get x removed, I don’t wanna lose the boy/girl I fell in love with”
• talks shit on nb genders
• has a fetish for only afab/amab ppl and defends it when u say it’s gross
• respects every other trans persons prounous and name except yours
• “it’s just so hard to use x pronouns and ur name:((((”

BOOK REC (Sci-Fi with PoC and wlw)

Why you should read The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers:

  • IT HAS A HUGE EMPHASIS ON FOUND FAMILY and also on moving forward and how you sometimes need different people at different stages of your life
  • The alien cultures, man, they are like nothing I’ve ever seen before on this scale. It’s not just surface stuff, it’s down to the belief systems and social interactions and how they view things like motherhood and violence and even board games! Also, FEMALE ALIENS WITHOUT BREASTS WHO ARE CONSIDERED VERY ATTRACTIVE TO HUMANS CAN I GET A HELL YEAH
  • Gender and sexuality are definitely way more fluid, one of the crew members is a species that changes gender across their lifetime (plus there is a crew member that goes by they pronouns, though not exactly in a nb way, it’s hard to explain)
  • Imagine Firefly, except in a universe full of aliens like Guardians of the Galaxy, and the crew aren’t criminals (for the most part) and are just generally a bit nicer. And by nicer I mean, as someone else more eloquent than me said about this book “they’re not all good people, but most of them are trying to be”. They care about each other despite all the cultural differences that sometimes have them screaming
  • most of the humans on the crew are not white
  • TWO FEMALE MEMBERS OF THE CREW BECOME A COUPLE I’m not gonna say which because it totally took me by surprise and that was an incredible thing cos I already adored this book and then it gave me the one thing it was missing that I hadn’t dared hope for 
  • polyamory is discussed frequently and is a base part of one of the alien cultures and it’s very normalised and respected
  • seriously everyone does their hardest to be respectful of each other’s culture and all the differences and even though sometimes they fail or really struggle they really TRY and that’s what makes it so great
  • the book is genuinely hilarious (“What do your crazy speciests do?” “Live on gated farms and have private orgies.” “How is that any different than what the rest of you do?” “We don’t have gates and anybody can come to our orgies.”)
  • there’s plot but it’s very character driven in a way that works really well
  • Kizzy - my favourite character who is just a joy (imagine Kaylee Frye if she was Chinese, hyped up on extreme amounts of caffeine, and totally eccentric)
  • REALLY AMAZING PLATONIC MALE/FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
  • like seriously every damn relationship in this book is so incredible and important and well done
  • I’ve never done a book rec on here before and the fact that I feel the need to do this should in itself say something about how amazing it is

In summary: 

  • SPACE GIRLFRIENDS NEED I SAY MORE
  • amazing and compelling alien cultures
  • a crew/found family that are so beautiful in their differences and how they do their best to respect and accommodate them
  • it’s really fucking funny
  • “Ninety percent of all problems are caused by people being assholes.” “What causes the other ten percent?” “Natural disasters.”

Growing up in a tight knit family of four brothers, Chris felt lots of love but also felt a wall where emotions and uncomfortable topics were avoided. Unfortunately, being non-binary almost inevitably brings deep conversations and explanations. While explaining that his preferred pronouns are he/him/his can be hard for some to grasp, he is eternally patient. His identity is still a new concept to many people, but Chris firmly believes that one day, people will understand that expressing identity is just being your authentic self. Chris’s willingness to speak out and engage in critical conversations doesn’t stop there. He also takes the time to educate others on the damage tobacco can cause to nearly every part of the body—he knows firsthand the importance of speaking up to help others understand.

9

What Cis People Say To Trans People Vs. What We Hear

By Meredith Talusan and Rory Midhani

TRANSlator 3000: Amazing technology translates cissexist BS!

“Oh you’re trans but you look so good!”
“Trans people are ugly.”

“I’ve never met a trans person before.”
“I assume I can identify any trans person.”

“I would date a trans person.”
“Trans people are usually undateable so I deserve a prize.” 

“You look just like a real woman.”
“Trans women aren’t really women.”

“I’m glad you’re being honest with me about being trans.”
“Trans people who don’t tell me they’re trans are deceivers and liars.”

“I loooooove trans people!”
“I fetishize trans people.”

“It’s so hard to switch pronouns.”
“Trans people are an inconvenience to me.”

“I don’t have a problem with trans people.”
“I have a problem with trans people.” 

i’ve decided whenever i see english written in a terrible ancient greek font i am going to say “it’s all grssk to me!” and laugh. this will be my legacy. this will begin to make up for every classics student who has had their friends, family, and strangers chortling “It’s all greek to me!” as they try to do their homework. this is my tribute to your strength.

shoutout to nonbinary people whose native language is heavily gendered!

to the ones who speak a language which doesn’t have any gender neutral pronouns at all!

to the ones in whose language there technically are some gender neutral pronouns but they’re hard to use because the language is heavily gendered and you need to create new forms of other words to use them, or because they mean something like “it” and you’re uncomfortable with them

to nonbinary people in whose language adjectives or verbs are gendered!

to nonbinary people who can’t talk about themselves in their language without having to misgender themselves or create new words (and sometimes also grammar rules!)

shoutout to nonbinary people who speak heavily gendered languages, it’s hard, I know, but I love you and I see you and you’re so strong

a shoutout to those friends who supported us 100%

a shoutout to the friend who switched to the correct pronouns right away without complaining about how hard it is to switch

a shoutout to the friend who helped us pick a new name

a shoutout to the friend who got excited with us as we reached a new milestone

a shoutout to the friend who corrected people who misgendered us

a shoutout to the friend who let us have our binders and other things delivered to their place when our parents wouldn’t allow that

a shoutout to the friend who researched and asked us question so they could understand better

a shoutout to the friend who kept validating us

a shoutout to the friend who was always there to listen

a shoutout to the friend who stood up for our rights

a shoutout to the friend who understood

a shoutout to the friend who supported us 100%

alright but hustle cat  is such a good game

also tag urself im recess

The first one fucks you up, you know?

You spend weeks trying to convince yourself
that it is okay to feel: it’s okay to want him,
it’s okay to hold his hand, it’s okay
to love this love that boils out of you
like you’re on fire and he’s the burner.
It’s okay to let him touch you,
to feel more than just yourself,
to unclench your fists and loosen
the noose fear holds around your neck,
to lose your stiffness.

It’s like once you get the hang of it,
once your palms stop sweating
in his presence, once you believe him
when he tells you there is nobody else,
when his shoulder blades feel like craters
and you are sinking into the depression,
that’s when he leaves.
And suddenly, it’s only you again
and you beg but he won’t come back
and you feel so fucking stupid
for having feelings, for letting him in,
for ruining everything.

Now you are so full of the love you
tried to give him but he wouldn’t take.
It’s like there’s a hole in his heart
that devours every ounce of your love
and leaves you with only sadness.
You just want to hug him, to tell him
you’re sorry, to spend one more night
with his dreams on your pillowcase,
but instead you spend two weeks in bed
just to watch him kiss someone else
when you get out of it and
you wish there was a way to die
without terminating your existence.

You come with a disclaimer now:
You are obsessive, crazy, your love
is too loud to be reckoned with.
When he tells you that you are
the problem, you believe him;
after all, he saw your fire
and chose to run away from it.
The fault lines in your palms have
never seemed so big and even though
you are the one with the broken heart,
you are also the one who
can’t stop the apologies from
running down your chin.

The first one fucks you up, you know?
But you’re not fucked up; he is.

—  You shouldn’t have to beg people to take your love. They should want it. You have so much to give.

yyyyYYYYYY'ALLLLL I had a freaking intensive dream about Rad Likes Robots and I kinda wanna cry???? ;;;;w;;;;

[[It’s a long ‘un this time too j f c;;;;]]

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Can i req. Headcanon for how our OW men would react to their s/o calling them 'daddy'? Lmao thanks maybe?? It's alright if no 💖

(( I personally am not too big on the Daddy kink but I find this amusing lol. <3 ))

Reaper:

-” What the fuck??”

-Confused at first, but actually likes it.

-”Call me Papi, it sounds better.”


Lucio:

-”Babe…? Did you mean to do that?”

-Had no idea you are into that kind of thing, but doesn’t mind.

-You’ll get no kinkshaming from Lucio. In fact he embraces it wholeheartedly.


76:

-” How many times do I have to tell everyone that ‘I’m not your father’? Now you are doing this shit too??” Doesn’t realize what context it’s in at first.

-Once he finds out… Oh shit, that’s pretty hot. He’ll be your daddy, agent.

-Also loves it if you call him Commander. Major praise and roleplaying kink here.


Roadhog:

-”….” At a loss for words, surely you didn’t just do that?

-You truly were full of surprises, weren’t you?

-” Keep calling me that, and I’ll make you squeal. “ In a good way, of course!


Junkrat:

-” …. I am not ready to be a dad! Shit, I gotta go tell Roadi-…. Oh. OH.”

-Big ass smirk, who knew his sheila was so kinky?

-A bit bad at the whole thing first but really gets into it and does his best.


McCree:

-”Didn’t expect this from you. Won’t hear no complaints from me, though.” Pretty smug about it.

-”Let Daddy have a good look at your pretty face, darlin.” Rolls with the whole thing, best Daddy tbh.

-Never bring him home to your parents, is the kind to respond to his new role even when you’re around your actual father. Awkwardness ensures.


Genji:

-Doesn’t bat an eye or miss a beat. “What’s wrong, baby-girl/boy/preferred pronouns?”

-It’s so hard catching him off guard with kinks. He’s really been around and actually has a bit of Daddy kink himself.

-”What? Are you surprised?”


Hanzo:

- “ I… need a moment.” Bright red, congratulations Hanzo machine broke.

-Takes him a while to warm up to the idea.

-But if if made you happy and horny then he had no problem adjusting.


Zenyatta:

-Is literally the most confused out of everyone. Goes to Genji for help and advice.

-”They do know I’m not their father, right?” Poor Zen, but he soon gets the whole gist of it from Genji.

-”You’ve been so wonderful for Daddy today. I think you deserve a reward.” Trying his best for you.


Doomfist:

-Before you can finish your sentence you’re on your knees.

-”Say that again.”  What a fun way to find a new kink.

-” Beg for Daddy, little one.” A common line from him.


Reinhardt:

-Chuckles wholeheartedly. “ I’m your boyfriend. Are you feeling homesick?” Too innocent for his own good.

-It’s embarrassing but you had to explain the whole thing to him.

-” Do you think I would make a good Daddy, liebe?” Is willing to try it!