Hey there :) How does Magnus feel about being intimate again after his and Alec's rough patch? What is that night in the hotel like? I imagine he would also have a difficult time adjusting.
For the most part, Magnus is able to reintroduce intimacy in the relationship without much trouble, because he’s so damn grateful that it’s a possibility again. Basically, once they start communicating again, Magnus is 100% ready to go, and to put in the work to fix what needs to be fixed.
Because for him, the most difficult part of the rough patch was that he had no idea what was going on with Alec. He and Alec have two completely different experiences during that time, because their perspectives are both so narrow. So during that time, while Alec describes how he doesn’t know which one of them started pulling away first, or when things started getting difficult, Magnus knows exactly what happened. From his perspective, Alec gradually started brushing off Magnus’s attempts at intimacy, then any sort of touch, and then any attempt at real conversation. There are so many times during the rough patch where Magnus asks Alec how he’s doing, and how his day was, and he *means* it, but Alec thinks it’s insincere. Their wires are completely crossed at that point, and they’re basically experiencing two different relationships entirely. Alec feels like they’re growing apart, and that it’s felt by them equally. And Magnus feels like Alec is closing him off and pulling away and eventually rejecting him entirely, and he has no idea why.
And that’s the hardest thing for him. Magnus *hates* not knowing things, and not understanding things. So not knowing why Alec is acting that way (and watching Alec seemingly brush off any attempt Magnus makes to try to help him) is basically unbearable for him. So when the rough patch ends, it means Magnus finally understands what’s been happening. And that means that the real *problem* for him is fixed, and all the other things they still need to work on are relatively minor. They’re talking again, and they’re being honest about what’s been happening, so as far as Magnus is concerned, they’re going to be fine. He’s more than ready to feel like they’re a couple again.
That being said, he’s *incredibly* aware of the fact that intimacy is more complicated for Alec during this time. He understands that Alec needs some time to feel like they’ve gotten distance from the rough patch, and to feel fully comfortable being intimate again. But as long as they’re still being open, and talking about these things, Magnus doesn’t think it’s a problem. He’s more than willing to take some extra time, and to go back to asking Alec too many questions before initiating anything (like he did at the beginning of their relationship). For him, the biggest obstacle has been passed, and he’s so ready to start working toward something better.
As far as the night in the hotel goes, Alec is more worried that it feels like they *have* to have sex (since they have the chance, and it’s a fancy hotel, and there are all sorts of implications to them getting a room for the night), so he makes it clear that he’s not trying to push anything, and that nothing he does or says or wears is meant to pressure Magnus into anything. And for his part, Magnus is fine one way or the other (he’s still dealing with some physical after-effects of his half of the rough patch’s low point), and wants to respect Alec’s boundaries. When they do eventually have sex that night, it’s gradual, and easy, and they both feel as comfortable with it as they did the first time.
do you mind making some more lance hcs?? I've read all of the other ones like 3 times.
anon that’s a lot of headcanons to be reading lmao.. i don’t shut up about my Blue Boy. This is half headcanon/half character analysis lmao.
WHOM UP FOR SOME LANGST.
Lance has a boatload of insecurities, but I don’t think he has depression. (Time to project) What happens is that his ADHD causes him to hyperfocus on his mistakes to the point that he gets trapped in his Hell Brain, stuck in this bad cycle where he constantly berates himself and inflates his personal fears. But he’s normally able to manage because he has a huge support network- his bigass family.
There are definitely little kids in Lance’s family, and being around kids who love you is so nice?? Whenever Lance starts feeling weighed down, he plays with his baby siblings/cousins/neighbors and lets their enthusiasm feed his until everyone is bouncing off the walls and being ushered outside. I’ve probably said this before, but Lance was Born to be an uncle.
Anyway, Lance is used to being surrounded by people he has a deep connection with who truly care about him and love him. So at the Garrison, when he was far away from his family, he struggled a little bit but ultimately supplemented his human contact quota by befriending pretty much everyone. If he knows that people like him, then he can like himself.
Which is why in space he’s kind of… deflating. Because he’s surrounded by people who have rebuffed him before, and it’s hard not to internalize that, ya feel?? Like:
Pidge refused to do anything with Hunk & Lance when they were all at the Garrison, which is fair bc she was in Deep Cover, but Lance obvi didn’t know this so he was honestly kind of hurt?
All his attempts at friendship and bonding were coldly shut down the moment they left his mouth. Lance spent many a sleepless nights wondering what was wrong with him, what aspect of his personality made Pidge hate him on sight.
It… sucks to know that no matter what you do, someone will remain distant, especially if you’re used to making friends. Lance is a fixer, but how can you fix something if you only know part of the problem?
Keith straight up forgot who Lance was. And you know that Lance had really built-up their relationship in his mind. Even if it’s because Lance claims they ‘hated’ each other, it’s clear that Lance considered Keith special in that he was a goal to beat/overcome, and he clearly assumed Keith viewed him the same way. So when they reunited and Keith didn’t recognize him… Ouch.
It hurts to realize that you’ve put way more into a relationship than someone else, but it especially sucks if they never even noticed you in the first place.
Also, lots of resentment issues thanks to the Garrison constantly comparing Lance to Keith. Bastards.
Shiro is Lance’s hero, but Shiro is such… a jackass to Lance gsdhkjgd I’m so mad about how Shiro has been treating Lance as the show progresses.
Shiro kind of… assumes that they’re equals, which normally is fine, but Shiro physically pushes/shoves Lance around, ignores his opinions, and tells him to knock it off whenever Lance acts like himself.
And between close friends, that behavior can be ‘acceptable’, but again: Lance looks up to Shiro. So this treatment.. I can only see Lance negatively internalizing it. How good of a teammate can you be if your hero only ever treats you as a joke?
And Allura… it’s clear she’s really not interested in Lance’s flirting. Which would be fine, but it’s kind of been their entire relationship so far (mainly because of Bad Writing), so when Allura rejects Lance’s bad pick-up line she kind of rejects any connection at all, including friendship.
Like, you can argue that this is Lance’s fault for constantly hitting on her, but Allura’s natural response to Lance is either Carefully Maintained Neutrality or clear exasperation.
That’s not exactly… a warm welcome, so I could see Lance slowly just starting to avoid her. Because it SUCKS to enter someone’s line of view and immediately see their smile drop a fraction. It sucks to know that someone immediately has their guard up the moment you try to talk to them. It sucks to feel like you’ve sabotaged any chances before you even knew you had them. It sucks to realize that you, and your personality, made someone feel this way, and that you are the problem. From there, you learn it’s better to just… stay away, and stay quiet.
TLDR Lance is really only comfortable comfortable around Hunk and Coran. And the Space Mice, provided they don’t rat him out to Allura.
Lance internalizes a lot of stuff lmao. He reacts by overcompensating; when he feels hurt or out of his depth, he amps up his ego, he goes all out with the flirting, he uses bravado to cover up any cracks in his armor.
(If you keep making them laugh, then they’re too busy to laugh at you.)
Lance is his own worst enemy. If someone yells at him and calls him a failure, he can get righteously angry and ignore what they said or crack a joke to ease the tension. He can deflect. It’s when he’s alone, when he has time to think, that he begins to place more pressure on himself.
You know how people can become paralyzed by their perfectionism? They’re so worried about getting the end product perfect that they can’t even start the process. That’s Lance, to some extent.
He prunes his own self/image. If he can’t get something right, he cuts it out of his personality. He doesn’t cling to it. He gets rid of anything he thinks makes him a failure, anything that shows that he’s useless. All those branches, traits, imperfections- they’re snipped away. And what he’s left with, he clings to. This is his absolute. This is his foundation. These are the tenants he builds himself up from. He’s the ladies man. He’s the sharpshooter. He’s the funny one. This is what makes Lance McClain worthwhile.
So when that foundation gets rocked… it’s bad. And normally, he can spring back, because he has his support network. But right now he’s billions of light years away from home, stuck with a team that only seems to like him 70% of the time.
I have a headcanon I'd like to share with you if that's ok!!! Hanzo likes various plants, especially succulents. So he has a bunch in a window garden, that he spends a lot of time taking care of. When he's alone it's a fair bet you can find him singing soft lullabies, songs of luck and growth, and things in Japanese he'd always meant to tell Genji, but since he couldn't he sings them to his plant babies while he's taking care of them.
Anonymous said to thetiniestcicada:
Since he never got to do that for Genji when he was little, he wants to at least help something grow and be wonderful in life.. And when Mcree accidentally happens upon Hanzo one day singing to his succulents and smiling softly to himself as he remembers the good times he did have with Genji when they were young, it reaffirms every reason in his head of why he loves this man. And he knows in that moment this is the man he wants to marry and spend the rest of his life with.
Anonymous said to thetiniestcicada:
Also, you are a beautiful wonderful human being and you are the first I have ever shared a headcanon with. And I want you to know that’s how much you and your blog mean to me. Ty bug bb, you are the bestest.
Hey anon, this headcanon is absolutely beautiful?? Thank you so very much for sharing it, I’ve been thinking about this all day long and couldn’t help but doodle something for it because I loved it so very much :’))