but my makeup came out pretty!

signs as dumb YA novel clichés

Aries: The Chosen One~ “This wasn’t how my life was supposed to go. When I turned 18, I wasn’t expecting to be thrust into the Underworld. I was gonna go to college, be a normal student and rush Sigma Phi Chiapet my sophomore year. But everything is different now. The prophecy has spoken and I’m going to go through a training montage and become really badass really quickly even though I was against being the chosen one in the first place but now I have a black belt after a month of punching bags of sand and now I’m ready to save the world. And guess what. At the end of the book…………. I save the world.”

Taurus: The “you don’t know think you’re beautiful until a boy tells you so / not like the other girls” average looking protagonist~ “Hi. My name is Tookiewisp Flowerspark. I’ve got mousy brown hair and bright brown eyes. I’m tall and thin and I don’t have boobs yet. I love to wear my worn out high top converse and skinny jeans. Maybe if I wore a dress, boys my age would notice me. But to be honest, I’m just not into girly stuff like most other girls are. You could say I’m different.”

Gemini: Crush throughout the entire novel turns out to be an asshole~ “He’d never notice a girl like me. He doesn’t even know my name!’ *sudden makeover transformation where she takes her hair out of a ponytail and takes off her glasses* Boy: ‘Wow, Winteria Snow. I never realized how pretty you were until you put on makeup and put in some contacts. Will you be my girlfriend?’”

Cancer: Instant love~ “That’s when a saw her, walking down the street. She was coming my way. Her hair blew in the wind like a majestic mane of gold. The way she walked made my heart skip a beat. I started sweating and I couldn’t stop my heart from racing. I stared at her as she walked past and I tried to say hello, but my words came out in a jumble. She gave me a weird look and walked away. It was at that moment that I knew I had fallen in love and found my soulmate. Also, by the end of this book she falls in love with me even though I basically obsessively stalk her throughout the entire novel and have no redeeming qualities.”

Leo: The Queen Bee~ “That’s Brooke Richardsworth. She’s the coolest, most popular girl in school. She’s got long, straight blonde hair and wears pink skirts, pink cardigans and pink headbands. Those are her two slightly less attractive friends, Chelsea and Paige. Brooke is also dating my crush. We used to be friends, but ever since I accidentally spilled my chocolate milk on her back in the third grade, she’s done everything she can to make my life miserable.”

Virgo: Problematic parents~ “My parents recently got divorced, so now on the weekends I hang out with my dad, and during the week I hang out with my mom. It gets pretty tiring going back and forth after a while, but every other Saturday my dad (who is also a professor at a university) takes me camping and we roast hotdogs over a campfire which really makes up for it. Recently though, he’s been hanging around a new young blonde woman named Tamara Blake. He’s been spending all of his time with her. We haven’t even gone camping since they met!”

Libra: The improbable love triangle~ “What am I going to do? I have two boys who just got into a fight at school because they both are in love with me, average annoying weird superiority complex girl. On one hand, there’s Jackson- the brooding bad boy who wears leather jackets and rides motorcycles and treats me like garbage when he’s in a grumpy mood. Then on the other hand, there’s Theodore- the quiet sensitive one who reads books and drinks tea and I always catch him watching me from behind a bookshelf in the library! This is the hardest choice I’ve ever had to make in my life. I HAVE to choose one of them. But… who?”

Scorpio: The dystopian society~ “Hi, I’m Bland McBore. In our society, the rich and the poor are divided into two groups and all the rich people are evil and live in a city where there are floating vehicles and all the buildings are white marble and/or chrome, and all the poor people live in mud huts and have to eat bugs and also everything is a weird shade of gray to represent sadness or something. I am going to start a revolution and overthrow the government with the help of my two best friends and once we start to cause trouble with our rebellion, the leader who is probably an old white guy with a pointed beard will offer us riches that we originally fought against in the beginning but don’t worry we will heroically reject them and fight for equality and won’t stop until society is no longer divided. Also people will definitely die but it will all only be people we are conveniently close to. Me and my two best friends get to live until the very end because we move the plot forward.”

Sagittarius: Protagonist just moved to a new school~ “My dad got a new job so we had to move across the country. I’m really shy and quiet and dorky so I know that my first day is going to be horrible. The teacher will make me stand up at the front of the class and then I’ll cry because I’ll be thinking about my life in my old town. Then as I sit back down at my desk, the teacher will keep on teaching instead of addressing that one of her students is visibly upset and crying. Then, the boy behind me will tap on my shoulder and introduce himself- this boy will be the guy I keep as my friend until the end of the novel where, plot twist, he ends up being my perfect match all along.”

Capricorn: The Intellectual~ “My favorite past time is to go to this tree up on a hill where my mom is buried that is also conveniently in the middle of the woods but also within a short walking distance from my house. I go there and I just think. Not of a lot of kids from school do that these days. Everyone is so obsessed with the latest gossip or the latest trend that it seems like everyone forgot how to, well, think. Sometimes I wish I was like them. I wish I could turn off my brain and mindlessly walk around without a care in the world. But I can’t because I’m different and smarter than everyone else and I also like to read and I love the smell of old books and reading and did I mention that I also love to read.”

Aquarius: Really weird “quirky” names~ “Hi, I’m Ingridagelica Applewindbalmkettlefish and this is my story. I know, I know, my name is pretty strange. My parents picked it because they said that when I was born they knew I was going to grow up and do something really great and unique and they also said that it means “not like the other girls” when spoken in Latin.” 

Pisces: The “nice guy” guy friend who turns out to be The One all along~ “I just can’t believe my crush won’t notice me! Tell me Carter, what am I doing wrong?” “Nothing, Skylightquia. If it’s worth anything, I think you’re pretty…. uh, pretty awesome, I mean.” *Skylightquia sighs and looks up at the stars from the rooftop they got onto somefuckinghow* “The stars are really beautiful, aren’t they?” *Carter looks at her meaningfully* “Yeah they are”

It’s been 400 years since... ~Naughty November~

Prompt: Hey :) It’s my birthday in three days I’m excited ahah! :D right ok, could you do a Kol smut where the reader is a badass vampire, bitten in like 1509 and is best friends with Rebekah. Kol meets her once, back in the 1600’s but they meet again at the Mikaelson ball, after the party, Kol leads her upstairs and they have rough, vampire, sex :)))))) (66)

Pairing: Kol x Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Warning: kinda long

TAGGED: @crysxtal @dunbarkiss @kirsty-lou666 @emo-chick-59-stuff@xxshewollfxx @horror-movies-and-disney@kittencutie245@thejulietfarciertlove @jwowwluv

P.S Happy early birthday ANON!


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I can’t take selfies for crap, but this filter is cute! I wish we had these trees where I live, but everything is burnt and dried lol

so let me tell you about new bae

we met at the store, she complimented me on my makeup. she so gorgeous and so thick. she kept talking to me and all i could look at was her perfect titties. i told her i could give her my number to share tips. she texted me fast as hell and it got flirty pretty quick. i wasnt expecting that since she had a young son but oh she is down for whatever.

she texted me she was bored since her son was out of town and finished her homework. i told her she could come over for girls night 😋

she came over with the cutest pajama set (no panties). we started play fighting about choosing movies and the next thing you know, she takes off her shirt and the most luscious double dd breast were in my face. i couldnt take anymore. i got naked super quick and start sucking! she pulled me to her face and i played with the wettest pussy for about 5 minutes then i needed a taste. she came in my mouth quick as hell and to repay her, i found the strap. baby, that ass was rolling, pussy juice all on my thighs and my hands full of nipples. next thing you know she slides me to the floor, flips me around and ate my ass like she was starving. i squirted all over her pretty mocha face and she slides me up to kiss it off. we take a bath where all we do is wash, lick and repeat.

we go to bed but i grab the strap for one more round baby. i may be in love.

Karma - Donatello x Reader

This idea was given to me by @tmntxreader-fics , they own the rights to these stories, and I’m so grateful to have been given the chance to write a sequel to her Raph x Reader fic!

Idea: A mashup of the 2k12 and 2k14 TMNT. The turtles have an unusually extreme growth stint during the period Y/N happens to be away.

“I think I’m gaining on you.”

“Definitely not.”

“I am! See?”

“Will you — ugh.” Donnie swatted my hand away from atop his head as I tried to compare our heights. “I’m trying to work.”

“Work shmork,” I brushed off, hoisting myself atop the desk and successfully shifting his notebook of hypotheses away from his work. “You’re just mad because you know I’ll be taller than you soon.”

“I’m not mad, I’m in the zone.” Donatello frowned, reaching toward his notes in vain. “I was in the zone, that is.”

“You really want to spend our parting minutes thinking about rates of osmosis?”

My sobering remark made him pause. He sat back in his chair, regarding me with a look of restrained sadness. “No.” He smirked, a mischievous smile I rarely caught from the genius. “You really want to spend them bragging about your height?”

“Gotta give you something to remember me by.” I kicked my legs back and forth, my bare feet brushing his knee as I did. “Today, we are in competition for the title of Vertical Challenge Winner. Eight months from now, the champion will be undebatable.”

I jabbed a thumb at my chest, throwing Donnie a sly wink and eliciting a chuckle from the terrapin.

“So, you want my memories of you to be associated with your petty height contest?”

“That’s about the most memorable thing about me, my friend.”

“Not in the least bit,” he contradicted, leaning forward and furrowing his brow in genuine concern I didn’t understand my significance in his and his brothers’ lives (which, to be honest, I still don’t understand).

“The only thoughts you’ll have of me in the next month will be of my annoying rambling and occasional taunts,” I promised him, smiling bittersweetly.

“Not true.” He leaned forward to tap my temple. “I’ll remember your bright mind.” His hand brushed my slightly raw knuckles. “And your persistence in training.” He rubbed at my right knee, the one I’d injured the night I met him in the middle of a tryst with the Foot. “And your clumsiness that is anything but unattractive.”

I blushed at that, as did he, suddenly recognizing how affectionate that last remark must have sounded. Hasty to cover it up, he grabbed hold of my foot, fingers dancing across the spot below my toes. “And I definitely won’t forget all your ticklish spots.”

“Cut that out!” I protested between giggles, writhing away from him and, in the process, tumbling off the desk in an ungraceful pile of limbs.

Donnie shot to his feet, helping me out of my stupor and onto my feet.

“You alright?” he did a once-over of me, making a hurried transition into Doctor Mode.

“Fine.” I smiled through the acute throbbing in my tailbone. “It’s these lengthy legs of mine. Who knew being the tallest would be both a blessing and a curse?”

My joke helped him revert from his analytical observations. “You’ll never let me live it down, will you? You’ll come back, and all you’ll talk about will be how I have to crane my neck to look up at you.” He rolled his eyes a bit. “A hyperbolic statement, on your part.”

“Hey, passing up the tallest turtle in the lair is a big accomplishment. I expect you to not rain on my parade when I succeed in overtaking you.” I grinned cheekily, slipping away to slide into my sandals.

Donnie’s airy laugh was cut short by his melancholy. “I just don’t see why you have to be gone for so long.”

“Eight months will go by in no time,” I assured unsteadily, willing tears not to pool in my eyes. “Besides, the longer I’m in Bolivia, the better. They need my volunteering down there.”

He stepped to me, laying a hand on my shoulder and turning me to face him. “Be safe, alright? Your clumsiness may cute- er, pleasant- but it’ll make you more of a target.”

“I know, Donatello.”

“Come back soon.” His hand dropped back to his side. “I don’t want to be without my lab assistant for too long.”

“That’s what I’ll remember you by,” I decided, grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder. “Your uncanny intelligence - and your desperate need for my help and technological expertise.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be right where you left me.” Donatello smiled, his diastema peeking from between his lips at me. “Things won’t have changed much around here.”

I strode closer, throwing my arms around the genius in an embrace. “Are you saying you’ll be the constant to my dependent variable?”

Another small chuckle. “Always, Y/N.”

I pulled back to look at him, to memorize his features for future reference. Laying a hand on his cheek gently, I whispered, “Thank God for my constant, then.”

And then I swiveled, bustling out, not bearing to say goodbye.

Goodbye meant tears.

And tears weren’t an option.

~8 months later~

The subtle glow of the christmas lights skirting the perimeter of the living room.

The sounds of pissed-off taxi drivers and dirty-mouthed pedestrians pouring through the grate overhead.

The taste of three-day-old pizza, on the brink of expiration.

The feel of cool night air on my skin, seeping in from the city streets above.

The smell of the sewer.

Yep, this is what home felt like.

I reclined on the couch, my luggage tossed haphazardly on the floor, my bare feet finally free from their sweaty socks and hiking boots.

The note at the entrance of the lair had clued me in to the fact that everyone was out on patrol. The place was abandoned, but I was too relieved to be home to consider how lonely I still felt.

I’d taken the liberty of using the shower, washing the Bolivian grime from my skin and applying my first layer of makeup in eight months. It felt nice to pretty myself up, to give in to silly American aesthetic standards. Though, when it came to wardrobe, my care for attractiveness ended. I was now dressed in comfy yoga pants and the Yankees sweatshirt I kept stored under Donnie’s bed.


I slowed the pace of my chews, my pizza slice hovering an inch from my lips. The notion that I’d be able to see him again drowned me with euphoria. Screw height challenges, I just hoped my slight increase in tallness didn’t make our reuniting hug all that awkward.

A commotion in the laboratory made me jump, and I brightened when the door swung ajar slightly. Of course! How could I have been so stupid not to check the lab?

I sprang from my spot, abandoning my pizza and sprinting to Donatello’s haven, hoping that he hadn’t kicked the habit of refusing missions to tinker and ponder. At least the absence of his brothers meant I could recollect myself without taunting once I broke down at the sight of my friend.

The lab was dark, apart from a single computer screen, lit and opened to a Chrome window on clearing Adobe scratch disks. Good, he was here. He was hiding.

I felt a telltale tingle run down my spine, the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end, alerting me to another’s presence.

“You didn’t say goodbye.”

I whirled to face the source of the voice, still shrouded in shadows. My friend seemed to be obscured by an enormous pile of tech.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, stepping forward, “I couldn’t stand the idea of falling apart in front of you.”

“I just would’ve liked to see your face.” His face was deeper, though the nerdy lilt wasn’t lost in the deep tones. “You left so quick I barely got a look at you.”

“Well, I’m here now,” I murmured ashamedly, “Come out. Let me hug you.”

I was expecting a smaller figure to step out. Instead, the entire supposed mountain of supplies moved, rose, and with a start, I realized that pile wasn’t a pile at all. I stepped back in shock, causing the figure to screech to a halt.

“About my being the constant to your dependent variable,” he started unsteadily, his voice wavering.

“Yeah?” I croaked, bracing myself against the desk.

“Your constant may have been altered just a bit.”

With that, he stepped into a light. I tilted my head back to gaze up at his face, more defined and towering above me now. He donned a new pair of glasses, taped and placed on the bridge of his beak. His shoulders had broadened, and his shell had increased in diameter. He must’ve been working out, judging from his swollen biceps and rock-hard abs only barely hidden behind his plastron, riddled with a few more scratches and ruts. Tech on his carapace was held in place by suspenders, strapped to a new pair of cargo shorts.

And his size. God, his size. He must be a good seven feet tall by now.

Donnie fiddled with the gadget strapped to his wrist, unwilling to meet my gaze. “Things have changed considerably, since you left.”

I step forward slowly, reaching up to graze his cheek with my fingers, offering a small smile when he started and glanced up. “I don’t think so. Look!” I tapped at the various pieces of machinery, gesturing to his head. “Still as brilliant as the day I left.”

“And you,” he chuckled shyly, reaching forward to stroke my arm, realizing the physical contact was a bit too personal for his liking and jerking away. “You look great.”

I grinned, leaning close and hugging him, rejoicing when his heart did a familiar flip flop at my touch. “About that Vertical Challenge?”

“Yeah,” he managed, wrapping his arms gingerly about me. In that moment, I felt more vulnerable and protected than ever.

“You definitely won.”

[NEWS] BLACKPINK Reveals Which Member Has The Messiest Room

On June 26, BLACKPINK guested on SBS Power FM’s “Lee Guk Joo’s Young Street” and talked about various topics including makeup and the member with the messiest room.

Rosé brought up her love for getting her nails done, saying, “My hands aren’t the prettiest, but I feel great after getting my nails cleaned up and choosing a pretty [design].”

Then the topic of BLACKPINK’s ever improving beauty came up, and Jisoo stated, “After we get our makeup done at the salon, I think, ‘Hmm, yes, this is BLACKPINK,‘” while Lisa added, “My hair is naturally curly, so I look like a lion when I wake up. Once I straighten my hair, I feel more at ease.”

As for the member who has the messiest room, BLACKPINK chose Lisa, who defended herself by explaining that she was too busy to clean up her room. Rosé revealed, “Lisa has lots of makeup products. She has her eyeshadows out everywhere.”

Can you relate with Lisa?

© Soompi

Vampire-(Derek Hale)

Originally posted by i-alwayslikedstrangecharacters

Prompt no. 3- ‘Look! I’m dressed up as you!”

Pairing: Derek Hale x Reader

Word Count: 412

Warnings: swearing

Summary: Derek is not too impressed when his mate dresses up as him for Halloween

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city of stars - peter parker x reader

fandom: the avengers/spider-man

word count: 1865

character pairing: tom holland’s spider-man x reader 

warnings: uhhh i don’t think any. they drink champagne LOL i guess that’s underage drinking (don’t do it kids) 

prompt (request): ok can i request a Classic bed sharing fic with peter you’re the only author i trust to write it

notes: this was requested a while ago lol and i jus finished it. it’s kinda messy and all over the place but i had fun writing it ! so that’s cool. enjoy xoxo. 

The Classic™: The hotel only has a king sized bed, I guess we’re sharing.


You didn’t know what Tony was thinking when he decided to pair you and Peter up for this mission.

It was a simple one, really, but it was also in Paris, France, and the quinjet had malfunctioned somewhere around Brussels, so you and Peter were forced to book a hotel. Luckily for you, you had Tony’s emergency credit card in your back pocket. It was easy to say you were going to get back at him for pairing you up with the guy you’ve had a ridiculous crush on for the past two years or so. He knew exactly what he was doing.

“Hey, I’m gonna go book a room,” Peter yawned, and you nodded, understanding his fatigue. You handed him Tony’s card, and made to go sit down on one of the comfortable plush chairs in the lobby. “I’ll be back.”

You were exhausted; it had been a ridiculously long night spent on your feet, in the most uncomfortable shoes known to man. Whoever said pain was beauty was right, you thought as you stared longingly at the strappy black heels you wore.

The two of you had to go undercover at a ball hosted by the president of France, making sure no ex-HYDRA (S.H.I.E.L.D, whatever) agents had anything planned for the special event. Someone had tipped you all off about an attack there, and Natasha insisted that someone attend the ball and keep watch. Boring enough, nothing violent happened, but you and Peter had danced the whole night and your heart was thundering in your chest.

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Just something I had in mind. I tried writing this 10000 times but kept deleting it cus I thought it was crap. So please tell me what you think. 

The reader moves back to Riverdale after being gone for 10 years. 

Originally posted by dailycwriverdale

After having left Riverdale 10 years ago I thought I would never return. To my surprise, my parents entered my room the tell me that I was wrong. We were finally going to move back. I was overcome with joy. I was finally gonna see Betty, Archie, Kevin and Jughead again. I missed them so much.

When I left I had been on good terms with all of them except Jughead. He was angry that I was leaving. His little hands curled up into fists and he even refused to hug me goodbye for a solid 20 minutes until my mom said we had to go. He opened his arms and held me close and whispered in my ear “I’ll always love you” before handing me a gold necklace with a tiny heart on it.

“What’s this,” I asked completely surprised.

“My mommy said I should give it to someone special and that’s you,” he said and kissed my cheek before running away.

A small smile appeared on my face when I thought back to the times I spend with all of them. I just couldn’t wait to get back.

I stepped into my old room and all the memories started flowing back. Sitting with Betty and trying to do makeup. I looked out of the window and memories of running around the garden with Archie came to me. I missed my friends so much. We had completely lost touch after I moved.

Since I was starting school pretty soon I thought I would just wait until then to see them. I couldn’t go now since it had become quite dark. I decided to call it a night but remembered how much I missed Pop’s burgers. I would have waited but trust me you can’t wait when it comes to Pops.

As I walked down the streets of Riverdale I got, even more, memories. The usual road to Pop’s had this secret turn Jughead and I only knew about. It was way quicker and way more efficient. I entered Pop’s and saw the one and only Pop. It didn’t seem like he noticed me.

“Can I get a burger and a strawberry milkshake?” I asked him. It seemed like he realized who I was by the sound of my voice.

“Y/N?” Pop said disbelieve in his voice. I nodded my head a smile appearing on my face. He pulled his arms around me and hugged me tightly. “You’re so grown up,” he said.

“Yeah being away for 10 years does that to you” I laughed.

“Well your food will be ready soon but please stay for at least 15 more minutes,” he said. I looked at him confused which made him continue. “Trust me you’ll be happy” he smiled.

I decided to believe me and sat down in the booth Jughead, Betty, Kevin, Archie and I used to sit in. I pulled out my phone and started looking through my usual social media. Pop came with my food a little while later and gave me a warm smile. I was already here so I just started eating here instead of waiting until I got home.

“You’re in my booth” a voice came. I looked up and was met with the same blue eyes I had missed so much. My heart was about to explode. Jughead Jones the third was standing in front of me for the first time in 10 years.

“Sorry, although this used to be mine too” I laughed. To my surprise, Jughead didn’t seem like he recognized me. I laughed at his confused expression.

“Who the hell are you,” he said getting a little mad. I didn’t blame him I look completely different. I traded the pink skirt and ballerinas in for some combat boots and an oversized army jacket. The bow that used to be in my hair was long gone and now I was very over the top with my makeup.

“Your worst nightmare,” I said as a joke before pulling the necklace out from under my shirt. The gold heart had always been with me. Since the day Juggie gave it to me I never took it off.

“Y/n” he whispered before pulling me up for a big hug. His arms snaked themselves around my waist. I put my arms around his neck.

“Hey, Juggie” The nickname was one I had given him when we were younger. “You’re back?” He said hope laced in his voice. I nodded my head quickly. It was amazing being back and even better to be in Jugheads arms. We both sat down in ‘his’ booth and started talking.

“You know I really missed you right,” he said after awhile of talking. We had had about 4 milkshakes each and I ate my burger while Jughead kept stealing my fries.

“I missed you too. Thought about you every day though. The necklace reminded me” I smiled. Every day when I came home from school I would think about where Jughead, Kevin, Archie, and Betty were and what they were doing.

“You really always wore it,” Jughead asked like he didn’t believe me. I mean I understand why the same piece of jewelry every day for 10 years is a long time.

“Every single day Juggie. People at my school would always ask me why I wore it so much” I laughed.

“What’d you tell them,” he said with a small smile.

“It was a present from an old friend I wanted to have in my life forever,” I said a blush rising to my cheeks.

“Really. Forever.” He said in disbelieve. I nodded my head slowly. I saw how Jugheads eyes widened while laughing at his reaction.

“Jug you were my best friend. That was the best friendship I ever had. I missed you a lot and the necklace kinda made it better” I said.

“Well, then I have a confession” he started. “That necklace is actually worth a lot more than you would think. When my grandfather moved out from his parent’s house he only had a little money but he put all of it. And I mean all of it into that necklace for my grandmother. Then my grandmother gave it to my father to give to mom and then my mom told me to give it to someone special” he finished a shy smile on his lips.

“Wait what” the necklace was worth something. I had never known. But why didn’t he tell me when he gave it to me. Or after. And what if I didn’t come back.

“I knew that we were meant to meet up again.” he said

“Deep for a six-year-old” we both laughed.

Flash forward.

Riverdale’s sweethearts Y/N and Jughead had now been dating for 2 years. From when they were kids everybody knew they were destined to be together. The lonely boy who only wore black finally found his princess. And from the day they had their first kiss, Jughead knew they would spend their lives together. And she knew he would always be there for her.

The prince and princess of Riverdale

speakingintothevoid  asked:

Hey, in your recent Poison-Ivy-wraps-Batman-in-kudzu fic you mention that Harley died, and in Sweet you mention that she was "dunked" by the Joker. Did Joker kill Harley at some point? (Also curious if it's related to Harley's red-rimmed irises)

i don’t know who started the whole ‘joker dunked harley in the same chemical bath that jokerized him’ thing, but i stole it and added in some ‘technically this was murder it just didn’t stick’ - it bleached her skin/hair/eyes, interfered with her ability to feel pain (so she’s capable of terrifying feats of strength that basically tear her body apart because she can’t feel that that’s what she’s doing), and interacted weirdly with her schizophrenia (got rid of her tics, reduced her focus and impulse control, worsened her visual hallucinations and susceptibility to delusions) (it also changed how she responds to her meds which is why it’s so much harder for her to stay medicated)

i added the eyes thing because it seemed like something capable of bleaching joker and harley to look like perma-clowns would have other visual effects beyond the usual joker’s-green-hair. also i thought it would be kinda cool and creepy.

(my theory is that the original joker chemical bath idea came about because figuring out what would and would not completely ruin someone’s makeup is a pain in the dick and saying ‘no they actually just look like that’ solves the problem pretty neatly, and once you’re doing more with harley she runs into the same problem/solution)

Tell Her - part 2 (Eliza x Reader)

Warnings: alcohol mention/a drunk Eliza, some sexy times;;))

Words: 1884


“He cheated on me.”

At those words, you ushered her inside, and you caught a whiff of alcohol. You became increasingly concerned; Eliza never drank. Ever.

“Tell me what happened.” You guided her over to the couch and turned the TV off, focusing all your attention on her.

She wiped at her eyes, further smudging her makeup. “Alex. He was making out with Maria Reynolds. Apparently Thomas saw them, and he seemed pretty smug when he was telling me. And then I confronted Alex, because I didn’t really believe Thomas. They’re always messing with each other. But then he got all pale and flustered, so…” Her eyes met mine, and she just looked so broken. “I guess it’s true. So I stole his car and went back to my house, but I didn’t want to deal with my sisters so I came here.”

A smile almost popped on your lips at the thought of Eliza hijacking Alex’s car, but you restrained yourself, knowing she was hurting. Instead, you laced your fingers with hers comfortingly, and she squeezed your hand. “I’m so sorry. You deserve better.” She laid her head on your shoulder. “Tomorrow, I’ll beat his ass.”

A soft laugh escaped her lips. Another matter was pressing against your mind. “Eliza, have you been drinking?”

The sad look returned to her face, and you wanted to do nothing more than kiss her in that moment. “Yeah. It just hurt so much, I thought it would help. I didn’t drive though, so you’re not harboring a criminal or anything.”

You looked at her, astonished. “You walked all the way here?”

“You know, it’s really not that far from my house, Y/N. You’re just incredibly lazy.” A smile formed on her lips, and her eyes slipped closed.

“Are you alright? I mean, of course you’re not, but can I get you anything or…” You trailed off once you saw that her eyes were open again, staring intently into yours. “What?” you asked softly.

Her gaze dropped to your lips, then met your eyes again, and your breath hitched. “Eliza?”

Her hand slowly cupped your face, and you were very aware of her face coming closer and closer to yours. At the last second, you closed your eyes, just before your lips touched. Your hand went to tangle in her hair as your lips moved against hers.

You tried to convey to her just how long you’d been waiting for this through your kisses, as they grew more and more heated. Her other hand went to your waist and goosebumps formed at her touch. Her hands were soft, and she inched her way up your side until she just barely grazed the side of your breast.

You gasped, and reality struck you hard. You pulled away quickly, immensely regretful. “I’m so sorry, Eliza. We can’t. You have no idea how much I want to do this, but we can’t. You’re drunk, and you’re hurt. It wouldn’t be right.”

She nodded and looked down. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

You shook your head and took her hand. “Don’t be.”


The sun streamed through the curtains, waking you from your sleep. You were disoriented, wondering how you had gotten onto the couch. Then you remembered last night, how Eliza came over, how you kissed her, and how you let her sleep in your bed upstairs. It all seemed a little surreal, like it didn’t actually happen.

You shook your head and went to grab a glass of water and some ibuprofen. You padded up the stairs and knocked softly on your bedroom door. When there was no answer, you slowly opened the door, not wanting to wake her. But she wasn’t in bed. “Eliza?”

Then you saw that your bathroom light was on, and when you stepped in you were met with the sight of Eliza in nothing but a towel. Her hair was clipped up and she had washed off the smudged makeup, and her wide eyes stared into yours.

“I took a shower.” The words came out in a rush.

“I can see that.”

“I hope you don’t mind.” You shook your head hurriedly. All you could focus on right now was the fact that she was standing in your bathroom, nearly naked.

You then remembered why you had come upstairs, and outstretched your hands. “I brought you some ibuprofen. For your hangover.”

She gladly accepted the water and headache-relievers. As she downed the pills and glass of water, you stood around awkwardly, unsure of what to say, if anything.

As soon as she finished, you said, “Look, about last night, you can just forget about it. You were drunk and hurting so I won’t feel bad or anything if you say it meant nothing, because obviously it would have meant nothing so-”

She cut you off by grabbing your face and pressing her lips to yours softly. Your hands moved to her waist. She pulled back slowly. “It didn’t mean nothing to me. Did it mean nothing to you?”

You shook your head and tipped your head forward so that your lips met again. They moved across one another as Eliza gently pushed you back against the counter.

She pulled back briefly while still pressing light kisses all along your jaw and neck. “If it meant something to you, then why’d you stop?”

Slightly out of breath, you replied, “I didn’t want to take advantage of you. You were quite drunk and you’d just found out that your boyfriend had cheated on you- oh!”

Your voice had suddenly become loud in realization and Eliza pulled back and looked into your eyes, startled. You furrowed your eyebrows. “What about Alex? You two just broke up and I don’t know if you want to take some time before you, I don’t know…”

You glanced away, and she brought her hand to your jaw to turn your eyes towards hers again. “Y/N,” she said softly, “I have never been more sure in my life than I am right now.”

As you looked into her eyes, you could tell she was being serious, and a huge grin spread across your face. “Well in that case…” Your eyes slipped shut and your hand went behind her neck, pulling her closer.

Every time your lips touched, it felt as if a million fireworks were going off at once. You never wanted that feeling to end. Your one hand played with the hair at the nape of her neck and your other hand went to the small of her back.

She broke off of your lips again and trailed down your jaw to nip at your collarbone. When she touched the sensitive skin of your neck, you gasped, which only seemed to push her further.

Eliza’s fingers ran across the exposed skin on your stomach, sending chills all throughout your body. She began to play with the hem of your thin crop top, and she looked up to you, seeking assurance. When you nodded, she slipped the fabric over your head, revealing your chest.

You restrained from covering up your chest with your arms. Eliza must have sensed your self-consciousness, because she took your hands in hers and pressed a light kiss to your lips.

“You’re beautiful,” she whispered, and you felt a warmth spread throughout your body.

Her mouth moved down your neck, nipping and sucking at your skin. She took one of your breasts in her mouth, swirling her tongue around your nipple. Your hands grabbed at the edge of the counter, bracing yourself at the sudden contact.

Your breathing became shallow as she worked her way across your skin, touching every inch of exposed skin with her hands and mouth. You moved your hands across her shoulders subconsciously, taking in the feeling of her bare, slightly wet shoulders.

As Eliza made her way down your torso, you stroked her hair, urging her on. Her fingertips dipped below the waistband of your pants, and she slowly began to drag them down your legs. You groaned in frustration and hurriedly kicked them off the rest of the way.

Eliza laughed softly and pushed you so that you were sitting on the counter. “Someone’s eager.”

A bashful smile grew on your face. “Sorry. It’s just, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.”

Her fingertips trailed down your arms and her lips pressed softly on yours. “Me too.”

“Really?” you said in surprise.

“Of course! You’re the most beautiful person I know, and you’re hilarious, and kind…” As she spoke, she let her hands rake down your sides and she bent lower. Her hot breath caused goosebumps to flare up across your exposed skin.

She began to place open-mouthed kisses all along your hips and inner thighs. Her mouth moved closer and closer to your center, until she finally placed a kiss on your core through your underwear. At that new contact, you took a shuddering breath and nearly moaned out loud.

You looked down at the beautiful sight before you; Eliza on her knees, nipping at your sensitive flesh and slowly pulling your panties down.

“You look so good like this, Eliza,” you said breathily.

She had dragged your last article of clothing down your legs and discarded it on the floor, next to the rest of your clothes. “Oh yeah?” Her eyebrow quirked upwards. “How so?”

You shivered, the countertop cold against your naked body. “Well, you’re already the most beautiful person to begin with, so that helps. Like, drop-dead gorgeous.” She giggled as you began to ramble.

“And then you’re here, and doing all these things and you’re so hot and you make me feel so hot and-” You gasped suddenly, as Eliza had just licked a long stripe up your slit.

Her tongue began to dance over you, licking and sucking and all you could do was lay back across the counter. Your breathing became shallow. Distantly, you could hear yourself mumbling incoherent nonsense, unable to form sentences.

You grabbed her hair as she sucked on your clit. Waves of pleasure resonated throughout your body, and desperate moans escaped your mouth.

“Eliza…” you breathed, as she clutched your thigh.

She continued to eat you out, and you felt yourself get closer and closer to the edge. You tried to hang on, but you knew you wouldn’t last much longer.

“Cum for me, Y/N,” Eliza whispered against your hot skin. As soon as those words slipped from her mouth, you fell off the edge and your orgasm washed over you.

“Eliza! Yes!” you loudly exclaimed, followed by several moans.

You sat up and brought Eliza’s mouth to yours, and you could taste yourself on her lips. Somewhere along the lines, Eliza’s towel had fallen off and she stood stark naked in front of you. Taking advantage of her lack of clothing, you reached around and grabbed her ass, and you felt her smirk against your lips.

You slid off the counter and slowly began to guide Eliza out of the bathroom and toward your bed. When her legs hit the edge of the bed, you pushed her against it and she fell back with a squeal. You climbed over her and continued kissing her.

As your lips began to travel south, you whispered, “Your turn.”

Poor Little Rich Girl-Part 16

Your father Lucifer is the Alpha of your pack and he rules your town with an iron fist.  He is forcing you to marry the son and heir of a rival pack.  It is 3 weeks before your wedding when you find out Sam Winchester is back.   Sam was your first love at 17, and when your father found out, he forced his family to leave town.  You haven’t spoken to him since.  What will happen when you see him again?

Characters: Alpha! Sam Winchester, Beta! Dean Winchester, Beta! Castiel Novak, Omega! Mary Winchester, Reader, Alpha! (Nick) Lucifer, Beta! Michael, Beta! Gabriel, Beta! Stephanie (OC), Alpha Eric (OC) Beta! Kerry (OC) Omega! Tess (OC) Alpha! Malcolm (OC)

Master List

Introduction (all parts are linked)

Text messages are listed in Bold

Dean and Steph headed back to their place to pack their bags while we headed back to Sam’s.  “You’re very quiet,”  Sam observed.  “Something on your mind?”

“I’m having a little trouble wrapping my brain around all of this,”  I admitted.  “A few hours ago we were eloping.  Now your Mom is dead and we’re having a shotgun wedding tomorrow for my “protection.” Uncle Gabe died to get me out of that house, Sam.  It seems like going back is an insult to his memory.”

  “Trusting your father goes against every instinct I have, Y/N.  But I will do whatever I have to to protect my Omega.  Even if it means making a deal with the devil himself.”

“This isn’t the way I envisioned starting our life together,” I whispered sadly, trying not to cry.  All this loss is suddenly too much to bear.  Uncle Gabe. Tess. Mary. So many lives destroyed because of Eric and his crazy sister.

When we pulled into the driveway, Sam reached over and caressed my cheek gently.  “I thought I’d lost you, Omega.” He whispered.  I shivered at his touch.

“I will always come back to you if I am able, Sam.   I suggest we hurry this little project along.  My father isn’t a very patient man.  He’ll be sending his men to come get us before long.”

We were packed and back in the car in under an hour.  “Time to head back to lockdown,” I grumbled.

Neither of us noticed the woman hidden in the shadows across the street watching us, her clothes still stained with Mary’s blood.

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My Girl

Summary: A solid Namjoon fluff. The simplest things drive him crazy and make him love you even more.


Word Count: 1646

 Song: My Girl - Dylan Scott


Originally posted by trash-for-bangtan


She looks so pretty with no makeup on

“Namjoon I have to get ready! I can’t go out looking like this!” She circled her face with her hand as she gave me a glare.

“Babe, you look beautiful as ever.” I turned towards her on the couch and she gave me a sigh. “We’re only going grocery shopping, who are trying to impress?”

“Ugh, my god Namjoon.” Rolling her eyes, she came out of the bathroom doorway and put her hands on the top of the couch and looked at me. “Well I guess we can go then.” I gave her a smile and got up from my spot. She grabbed the list of items we needed for tonight’s dinner, and shoved it into her purse. I stood by the door, and just watched her. She was stunning, she was beautiful. She doesn’t need foundation, or eyeshadow or eyeliner, she doesn’t need anything.

She’s perfect the way she is.

 You should hear her talking to her mama on the phone

 Her phone vibrated as we were watching TV, and when she picked it up and saw that it was her mom, her face lit up and she answered it happily.


She sat by my side throughout the whole conversation. I loved listening to Y/N talk on the phone with her mom. She treats her mom with respect, loves her mom to death, and is always assisting her whenever she needs the help. Loving a girl that loves her mom like that is easy to do.

She always tells me that she wants to be at least half the woman her mom is someday, but what she doesn’t know is that she already is.

 I love it when she raps to an Eminem song

That’s my girl

“I don’t think you can do it!” I told her as we were in the car driving to BigHit so I could finish some work up in the studio. She would be my company for the night and I didn’t mind.

“Oh yeah! I think I can!” She found the song that she was looking for and the beat flowed through the both of us. “You can’t sing your part though!” I laughed at her as she pointed at me.

“More power to you then!”

I watched her as she rapped my part in Cypher 4. The way she was so concentrated, and smiling through the whole thing. She hit every word, every note, and danced the whole time.

It wasn’t hard for me to not sing, because watching her sing my part, is everything I wanted.

 Man, her eyes really drive me crazy

 “I know you’re staring at me, I can feel your gaze.” I turned around in my chair, and saw her on the couch with a huge grin on her face, and her arm trying to cover it up.

“I’m not staring at all Namjoon.” She rolled her eyes, and I got up to sit next to her. Taking a little break from work hasn’t hurt anyone.

“Y/N I can feel your gaze drill holes in the back of my head!” I stared her down and she couldn’t stop laughing. “What are you laughing at you mad woman!” After her laughing attack, she put both hands on my cheeks and just looked at me. I looked in her Y/E/C eyes, and it’s just one more thing that drives me crazy. They truly are beautiful.

And before you know it, her lips are attached to mine.

 You should see her smile when she holds a baby

“Knock knock!” Y/N opens the door to the hospital room to reveal her sister and husband with a little one of them in the crib next to them. I set the flowers and balloons on the table, as Y/N made her way to the crib.

“Can I hold her?” Her sister shook her head yes, and with a smile on Y/N’s face, she picked the newborn baby up and cradled it in her arms. “Quick Joonie, get a picture!” I pulled out my phone, and even though she wasn’t looking at the phone, I captured the moment of Y/N looking down at her newborn niece, and smiling. Her smile lit up the whole room, she was a proud aunt.

 I can honestly say that she saved me

My girl

 As I lie awake at night next to Y/N, I think of the times before I met her. My life was never bad, it was always great. I always said that after my ex-girlfriend left me before my debut, that I would live the bachelor life for awhile, and maybe never marry, and never settle down. I had the guys, they were enough. We were always on the road, performing, and always with our fans.

But, you never realize how good you have it, until someone comes along and proves to you that you have it even better with them in your life.

And that’s what Y/N did to me.

 Yeah, that’s my girl in the passenger seat

Windows down, dancing around, causing a scene

 “THIS IS MY JAM!” She turns up the volume to her new favorite song in the car, as we head to run errands. She rolls the window down, and hollers out the lyrics so loud, that I’m pretty sure the whole city can hear her. She starts dancing in her seat, and I look downward and shake my head. Yup, that’s my girlfriend, and I get to claim her.

We pull up to a stoplight, and as another car pulls up next to us, she sings to them and starts dancing. I let my guard down and start having a laughing fit. The other car rolled up their windows, and she starts laughing with me.

“I don’t think they liked your live performance Y/N.”

“More for you then.” She winked at me and I nodded my head, as I set my hand on her thigh and she kissed my cheek.

 That’s my girl, sipping Crown and Sprite

In a ball cap turned back, ooh, she got me like

Yeah, baby girl, you gone and done it again

 “Joon!” I heard her yell from the kitchen as the boys and I were in the living room watching TV. With a few days off, this was the place to hang out I guess.

“Yes?” I came into the kitchen with her holding plates and silverware. I saw the amount of food she cooked for all of us.

“Can you grab the cups, and that thing of noodles and bring it to the dining room, pretty please?” She leaned up and kissed me, before she headed towards the table. I picked up what she needed and took it to the dining room where she had the whole table set, with food and drinks.

She was wearing a three-quarters sleeve baseball tee with ripped jeans and her hair in a messy braid with a black baseball cap turned backwards. Something so simple, can drive me so crazy.

She took a sip of something from a glass, and set it back down on the table.

“What are you drinking?” I put my hands on her hips and she put hers around my neck.

“Well for your information mister, it is crown and sprite, not your favorite. Beer is in the fridge.” She patted my shoulder and was getting ready to yell for the boys before I pulled her in for kiss.

 Making all the guys wishin’ you were with them

But I bet they don’t see what I see when I see my girl

Oh, my girl

“Wow, Joon she’s amazing.” Jin told me as she was clearing the table of our dinner and rinsing them off as she was putting them in the dishwasher. We were all looking at her work, while we sat around the table sipping away on our beers.

“You say that like I don’t already know that she’s amazing Jin.” He turns red in the face, and does a nervous laugh.

“I’m just saying, I think anyone would be content on being with someone like Y/N.” He took a sip of his drink and I nod my head.

“Yeah, hyung. She’s the best.” Jungkook keeps looking at her.

“Kook, she’s too old for you, so stop your staring.” The guys laugh, and now it’s Jungkook’s turn to go bright red.

“I know she’s great, she’s the full package, she’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of and more guys.” They all nodded. “And hands off, she’s mine dammit.” After the bright faces, it turned into laughs as she joined us at the table again.

 Every night when she goes to bed

She hits her knees and bows her head

Thanks the Lord for another day

I just thank Him for my girl

 As we crawl into bed, she lays her head onto my chest, and my arm around her. I let out a sigh and kiss her temple. Her eyes flutter and they finally close, and the room falls silence.

I thank God everyday for letting her path cross mine. For letting her be in the exact spot as I was that day. For letting my clumsiness get the best of me as I tripped and knocked her phone out of her hand. I thank God for the endless support she gives me, even though I can be gone for a long time as I travel. She still surprises me when she shows up randomly at some concert or fanmeet. Y/N still makes my heart pound a thousand times in my chest, and she still manages to give me butterflies in my stomach.

I thank God, because I found the love of my life.

Not a Walk in the Park

Written by: @booksrockmyface

Rating: T

Prompt 6: Hi! I’d love to see the toast babies as bratty teenagers. Thanks :) [submitted by Anonymous]

Summary: Lily is getting ready for a date. Her brothers have quite a bit to say on the subject. Katniss and Peeta try desperately to keep the peace (and a secret).

Author’s note: Title comes from the Paramore song Still Into You. Many thanks to my bestie @thesaltywinteradult for betaing.

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