but just bear with me for a sec

A War Inside My Head

ao3 | ff.net

Thanks to @tantalum-cobalt and @chimaerakitten for looking this over. I didn’t change much but the things you pointed out, so thanks for taking the time to beta! I really appreciate it!


“What if I poke him?” someone murmurs.

“If you do that, he’s going to hit you,” someone else says.

“He wouldn’t hit me. It’s Dick.” The first voice pauses. “And besides, he’d totally poke me, too.”

“No, I’d do it to you. Or Damian, or Steph. But not Dick.”

“Yes, Todd,” a new voice chimes in, though it sounds reluctant. “Grayson would most likely dote on the sight of you drooling on your pillow.”

Someone snickers. “Oh my God. Now I can’t stop picturing it.”

“Shut it if you know what’s good for you, Damian. You, too, Tim.”

The voices are invading his dreams, Dick realizes. He can’t match voices to names or faces, but they sound familiar enough that Dick figures he’s not in any danger. And honestly, Dick’s tired enough to sleep for days.

He just wishes the voices would get the memo.

Someone tuts. “Like you could take me down.”

“I will shoot you.”

“Leave him alone, Jay.”

“And what’s up with that? Since when are you on the Demon Brat’s side?”

“Since he stopped Bruce from throwing out all of my coffee.”

“What—do I even want to know?”

“I thought it might be a fruitful investment. I turned out to be correct.”

Dick forces his eyes open, and he blinks blearily up at the trio standing in the middle of the living room, just inches away from the couch Dick had collapsed on when he’d gotten back to the Manor earlier. None of them are looking at him, and while they’re all being relatively quiet, it isn’t quiet enough for Dick. He’s tired, and as much as he’d normally love for his little brothers to be in the same room and talking and not killing each other, now is kind of a bad time.

He just wants to sleep, preferably without any little brothers interrupting his first rest in over 48 hours.

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Okay. BEAR WITH ME A SEC. If you watched Sailor Moon in the 90′s just TRY and tell me this fucking song wouldn’t have fit perfectly with the show *and I just learned Stan’s responsible for a song in the show anyway, SUDDENLY IT ALL MAKES SENSE*

Say what you will about the 90′s dub, it’s still my favourite, and boy did they use some bitching songs.

Originally posted by hide

Originally posted by rnewtu

My first pride parade!!!

September 16th, 2017 (i wrote this yesterday)

FIRST OF ALL, THE PEOPEL!!! omg, the people! There was 50+ groups in the parade, with 20 to 30+ people in EACH GROUP!!!
For the first pride parade in my town you wouldnt think there would be THAT many people, but there WAS! and there were people from every lgbtq+ acronym imaginable!!!! There were trans women, trans men, genderfluide people, nonbinary people, gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, demisexual, genderqueer people! And of all ages too!! It was incredibl!!

So the parade started and we had people watching and cheering all of us on and many people watchig were all dressed up for it too!

I have never in my life felt such a profound feeling of belonging and acceptance as i did walkig down that street surounded by hundreds of other people there for the same reason as me. I spent most of my time walking covered in goosebumps.

And really, there wasnt a whole lot of people there to watch, but thats because anyone that would have watched was IN the parade!

So we got to the park and i know none of you have ever seen this park before but its freaking HUGE! Id say its about the size of 2 soccer feilds put together. I was on higher ground and i could see all of the park from where i was standig and it was PACKED! LIKE, A WALMART ON BLACK FRIDAY LEVEL PACKED! THERE WAS SO MANY PEOPLE!!!!!! We easily toped 350.
Me and indigo (my dog) were walkig around and i found mum again so i gave indigo to her for a few minuets and went and bought this cute colourfull teddy bear.

Its kinda a build-a-bear nock off and they were giving away little shirts with them so i got one and as i was walking away this person i had met at the gsa conference (back in april) came up to me and was like “you need help putting that shirt on the bear” and instantly started helping before i even had the chamce to say anyhing, and i was a little bit stuned for a sec cause ive only ever met them in person once before and i had no idea they were gonna be there and they surprised me and they were so casual like we had known eachother for a long time. After they helped me with the bear we chilled for a lil bit and sorta caught up on thigs and i was so happy to see them again! Like, absolutly incredibly happy, they are one of my most favourit people!

And from there i just sorta walked around, talked to a tone of people, patted a tone of dogs, bought a few things, and watched a little bit of the show! There were a few small drag performances and they even had people to sign the lyrics of the songs for people who cant hear.

I got to see so many people that i hadnt seen in so long, it was great!
And then we left and went to McDonald and i seen EVEN MORE people there!

This day was such a great day, i have to say that it had to be one of the best days of my life! Im definitely walking in the parade next year too!

Im just so incredibly happy right now 💖💛💚💙💜

Ill have all the pictures in a seperate post, im still waiting for my friends to send me some!

Today’s Twitter thread: Hey did I ever mention my Phantom of the Opera r76 AU?

So like, the thing is that Reaper makes a pretty obvious Phantom, right.  But Jack as an ingenue? Jack as an ingenue would be the kind of pretty young thing who survives by dumpster diving in Paris back alleys & fist fighting for cash. Probably, in the grand historic tradition of pretty, broke young actors, offering blow jobs to smitten rich dudes.

And this is where it all goes off the rails. Because Eric goes all jealous murder-spree and drives Christine away. Whereas Jack chases Gabe down, screams in his face to knock that shit off and help him practice if he wants him to succeed so bad.

Raoul’s still a thing I guess. Dunno who he’d be but Jack is trash enough to enjoy watching two hot guys fight over him. Laughs at them after for thinking it has any bearing on which one he fucks. It’s not like they asked HIM. He was just enjoying a free show.

Let’s think about the seduction scene for a sec, though. I’m here for Jack in a corset & a frilly lacy white thing that reveals his thighs. Takes Gabriel’s mask off.  Whispers, “Holy shit.  You’re so hot.”
Gabe like, “Don’t mock me, I look like a burn victim.”
Jack: “Your face is fucked up, true, but I would happily die between those thighs.”

I always found this hilarious about the musical. Does anybody care what dude’s face looks like under that mask. Look at the rest of him.
Jack: Fuck it man, just put that Red Death costume back on and we’ll roleplay our way through this.

I just love the image of ethereal, angel-voiced Jack with bull shoulders, a filthy mouth and an inclination to brawl like a drunken sailor.

Somebody really Breakfast at Tiffany’d that boy up. They put him in a corset because his copious boobs won’t fit in the costumes otherwise. Gotta rein those suckers in or he’s going to pop buttons every time he deep-breathes for a high note.

Gabe follows that beautiful voice and finds him, aglow in the light of a stray sunbeam and singing as if he’s a human nightingale.
Then Jack’s like, “What the fuck’re you supposed to be?”
Clubs him with a stand lamp.
“Keep your shitty hands off my costume, creepo, they’ll make me pay for it if it gets ripped.”
Gabriel’s dazed.
Partly by Jack and also partly because he might have a concussion.
But he focuses on what matters.  "Your voice is incredible but you need to lose that accent if you want to make it in this business.“
"What, the Ghost of Christmas Future breaks into my rooms to mug me and then criticizes my diction?  Christ, I really am in Paris.”

And in the end Jack’s been saving up his money and buys them two tickets to San Francisco. “I hear they just opened an opera house. Let’s get the f**k out of this hellhole. Bet they could use a decent director and script writer.”

wanna one!kid au

HENLO I PROMISED THIS AT 8PM BUT IT’S NOW 1AM THE NEXT DAY IM SORRY

before i start just a big big big big big big big big big huge ass thank you to @exojjanggg and @wendyson for helping me w/ this!!! i wouldnt have been able to write it without them lmao

disclaimer: all of them are like 4-11 years old respectively and u act as their babysitter in this !!!!


daniel

  • probably holds their poor pet cat everywhere he goes and the poor lil kitty just lets him 
  • nervously sweats when he has to choose between holding seungwoo’s hand or the cat
  • buddies up with seungwoo whenever he goes anywhere
  • DONT SEPARATE THEM PLEASE
  • IF YOU DO DANIEL WILL CRY
    • “y/n i need 2 go to the washroom !!!” 
    • “ok- wait why are u taking seungwoo with u?” 
    • “ಥ_ಥ” 
    • “oKOK YOU CAN TAKE HIM PLEASE DONT CRY”
  • the type of kid to search blindly for your hand when he’s nervous
  • also giggles when he’s nervous
  • and giggles when he’s not nervous
  • just giggles all the time
  • probably loves u more than he loves his brothers sdfvhbafsd
  • IF HE’S NOT SMILING SOMETHING IS WRONG IN THE UNIVERSE AND SOMEONE NEEDS TO D I E
  • you thought he was gonna be a kid that was really hard to please but really all u needed to do was smile and he melted into the ground
  • doesnt know what to do when people start crying so he just plops his cat in front of them
  • colours so hard he breaks the crayon
  • the first time you babysat for them, he hugged u when u had to leave and thanked u for taking care of them ಥ_ಥ
  • the smollest bunny, likes being picked up but will never admit it bc he’s a ‘big boy’ now

daehwi

  • a ball of !!!! SUNSHINE
  • the first time he met you, he jumped on you and wouldn’t let go of you
  • he’s on your back 24/7 unless it’s nap time ??
  • during snack time u just gotta feed him while he’s on your back
  • always hums a cute song from one of those kiddie shows he watches 
  • vvv well behaved !!!!! just wants to make u happy
  • if he’s not hugging you, he’s hugging jihoon or jisung or anyone really
  • every time u leave he always kisses ur cheek and says goodbye a million times im !!!! crying
  • GRABBY HANDS WHEN HE WANTS TO BE PICKED UP
  • dolphin screams when he’s scared
  • is really bad with names
    • thought your name was brownie for a solid 2 weeks bc u brought all the kids cosmic brownies on ur first day
  • has to hold your hand at all times or else
  • so now u have sidekick daehwi and sidekick daniel + sidesidekick seungwoo 
  • always has money but u never know where he gets it from
  • asks u not to tell anyone
  • you’re too scared to
  • has 0 money sense tho
  • thinks a penny is worth more than paper bills bc they ‘look cooler’
  • slips u a nickel and whispers “4 ur hardwork”
  • crabwalks everywhere

jisung

  • helps u parent the kids even tho he’s like 2 ????
  • sometimes woojin will try to fight jaehwan bc he hate his chocolate and jisung will just sit there and watch them
  • he has his juice box ready with cookies being stuffed into his face and crumbs are falling all over the floor but biNCH !!!! THIS IS S P I C Y
    • daehwi’s probably sweeping the crumbs into his lil hands and dumping it into the trash can
  • he’ll break up every fight unless it’s over some spicy drama™️
  • does a head count 4 u every time u guys go outside
  • but you don’t trust his counting so you count again anyways and he gets all pouty
  • will stop pouting for ice cream
  • ok but 99.9% of the time he’s really responsible 
  • but sometimes he snaps and just
  • slides down the stair railings and into miNHYUN’S ARMS
  • cries when things go wrong
  • competitive as fuck, eomma jisung goes down the fuckin drain as soon as a prize is mentioned
  • pretends to know karate, doesnt know karate 
    • still threatens the kids with karate when they misbehave
  • gets salty when daniel, guanlin, seungwoo, or minhyun stand beside him bc he has to be the tallest one or he’ll >:((((( scream
  • has ur number memorized so sometimes when you’re not babysitting, he’ll call u up and ask if u can take them to the park

jihoon

  • the !!! ACTUAL CUTEST BABY WITH A HEART OF GOLD
  • gives half of his snack away to jinyoung always
  • always hands juice boxes out to everyone else before he gives himself one !!! just !!!! LOVE HIM FOREVER
  • makes sure guanlin doesn’t get lost
  • doesn’t really like being the centre of attention but ends up being it anyway so his brothers have 2 protect him ??
  • like bodyguards but with cute glares and puffing of chests even tho it doesn’t do anything but make them uncomfortable and tired 
  • was rlly shy around u the first time u babysat but probably slyly flirts with u now
  • slips u a piece of his chocolate bar when youre not looking and runs away
  • if u confront him he’ll be all innocent and stuff liKE BOI
    • “jihoon are u flirting with me?”
    • “no !!! ,,, but is it working? will u marry me now?”
  • pouts until he gets what he wants and makes those “hmph!” noises dramatically while crossing his arms over his chest
  • asks you for homework help but ends up asking u for all the answers
  • during nap time he’ll fall off his bed bc he’s That™️ deep of a sleeper and doesnt even stir
  • if jisung is your backup then jihoon is your backup backup
  • if any little thing is wrong he’ll know immediately
  • it’s just those Little Kid Instincts™️
  • actually gets dressed in the dark
  • daniel pretends not to know him in public

seungwoo

  • the coolest™️ kid in school
  • too embarrassed to invite any of his lil friends over for a playdate bc the house is so crowded with 11 kids
  • know everything abt everyone 
  • blackmails them
    • “jisung can i have ur cookie?”
    • “what the heck no !!”
    • “i know u broke mom’s vase”
    • “*nervous sweating* take it”
  • if yall dont have that drinkable yogurt shit he aint gon fuck with u
  • really hardworking and is quiet most of the time until daniel bursts into the room with a foam sword and a paper hat challenging him to a ‘duel’
  • jealous aS HECK WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO HIS BEST FRIENDS
  • if anybody even looks at his brothers or u ? theyre dead give him a pair of kiddy scissors 
  • sips tea from his sippy cup and roasts his brothers with his mom’s big sunglasses
  • can u say tsundere ?
  • pouts when he can’t express his feelings
  • steals food from his brother’s plates
  • refuses to sleep unless daniel is beside him
  • probably eats raw spaghetti noodles 
  • just takes a handful of them and walks around the house eating them
  • likes watching videos w/ u bc that means he can rest his head on your shoulder :’))
  • always slides in front for group pictures and has a permanent ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) face with the occasional ͡° ͜ʖ ͡ – or even the ( ͡°⊖ ͡°)

jaehwan

  • laughs at anything and everything
  • you could trip on the carpet and he’d collapse on the floor laughing
  • no one knows if he blinks or not
  • stares into your soul
  • u thought he was dead the first time u saw him
  • an actual sunshine when he warms up to u !!!
  • threatens to never stop singing until he gets food
  • his one true love,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
  • challenges daehwi to see who can scream the highest
  • but not before daehwi supplies everyone with earplugs (again, where the actual heck does he get these things ?? no one knows)
  • jaehwan pretends everyone sucks but in reality, loves everyone
  • can u say aNothEr tsundere ??
  • looks like he wants to kill something 24/7
  • squish his cheeks 
  • whenever he’s sad, someone can just pinch his lil cheeks and he’ll start giggling
  • has one heck of a lung capacity 
    • screams so loud people in canada can hear his voice
  • if you ever wanna bake something for everyone don’t ask him for help
  • all he’ll do is throw flour around and place the blame on sungwoon 
  • would trade his brothers over for half a tangerine
  • he doesn’t even like tangerines 
  • sly as hell knows how to get what he wants 
  • THE CUTEST GRINS, HIS EYES JUST CLOSE INTO CRESCENTS AND HIS CHEEKS BECOME 100000% MORE SQUISHY HOW IS THIS KID REAL 
  • listens to all ur gossip
    • “so this girl at school bumped into me and made me drop all my books and she didn’t even apologize!”
    • “:OOOOO WHAT A MEANIE”
    • “RIGHT ????? JAEHWAN U UNDERSTAND ME SO WELL”

woojin

  • scared the fuck out of u the first time u heard him speak
  • u asked for his name and in the deepest voice u’ve ever heard a kid possess, he says “hi im woojin!”
  • squishy cheek squad member #2
  • tries to be cool™️ and tough™️ but looks like a baby who has just come out of the womb
  • when u guys watch ‘scary’ movies, he tries to ‘protect’ u by covering your eyes when the movie starts 
    • ends up getting scared himself and having 2 hold back those tears >:(((( so he can be >:(((( A MAN 4 U
  • gets whatever he wants by bustin out those puppy eyes
    • like !!! who allowed his eyes 2 be so cute nd shiny ????? sue him
  • slaps a hand over jaehwan’s mouth when he starts to sing 
  • looks like he’s tired all the time but could jump someone if u asked
  • the definition of extra
  • sprawls across the floor dramatically only to ask “yo have u seen my teddy bear”
  • one time he got scolded by his teacher for scaring a classmate but really it was just because his aura is just like that and u best believe u roasted that teacher the next day 
  • when y’all walk in public and he sees a doggo he starts vibrating and poking u without taking his eyes off the dog 
    • “y/n-”
    • “give me a sec woojin i have to help sungwoon”
    • “y/n-”
    • “woojin just-”
    • “Y/N THERE’S A DOGGO”
  • eats angrily like the food hurt his family or smth 
  • drinks angrily too 
  • can probably down a caprisun in 0.001 seconds 
  • pretends not to like the kitty but you’ve caught him cuddling it and he begged u not to tell
  • says well known sayings wrong but no one wants to correct him
  • says the most ridiculous things with the straightest face
    • “y/n if i eat this old cracker do u think i’ll get superpowers”
    • “y/n daniel said that if i run really fast into the wall i’ll get superspeed do u think i should try it”

guanlin

  • THE SHYEST BABY
  • instead of holding onto your hand he’ll hold onto your shirt and let u drag him everywhere 
  • bites his nails when he’s nervous
  • so like all the time
  • istg this boi probably thinks aliens are out to get him
  • before nap time u always have to reassure him that no, aliens indeed are not going to abduct him in his sleep
  • if yall run out of banana milk be sure to catch urselves at guanlin’s funeral bc he’ll cry so hard he turns into a prune
  • THE ACTUAL SWEETEST BABY
  • for school he had an assignment where he had to draw a picture of someone he admired and one day he plopped down in front of u and was like “y/n can i draw u for school !!” and uR HEART JUST COLLAPSED
  • smol laughs that make his brothers go “!!! OH MY GOD HE’S A L I V E”
  • gives u all the spiciest™️ tea
    • “hey y/n,,,, did u hear,,,,,,,,,,,”
    • “hear what?”
    • “jisung broke mom’s vase but :|||| u didnt hear it from me,,,,,,,,”
  • snitches get stitches but not guanlin bc no one ever suspects guanlin
  • has 2 help his bros reach tol shelves for the good™️ candy
  • gets to sit in big bro jinyoung’s lap even tho like,,,,,,, jinyoung cant see anything except guanlin’s back
  • he’s the only kid out of everyone that thinks logically but is so easily persuaded because he’s smol and looks up to his big bros a lot :(((
    • “GUANLIN LET’S JUMP OFF THE COUCH AND FLY”
    • “jihoon, i dont think that’s possible-”
    • “SUPERMAN CAN FLY WHY CAN’T WE”
    • “,,,,,,,,,,,,,, OK LET’S DO IT”
  • he probably has a crush on u let’s be real
    • fights jihoon 4 ur love but very subtly 
    • probably picked u a flower for valentine’s day 
  • confused most of the time
    • doesnt know what’s going on but gummy smiles nervously
  • he has a closet full of hats with those plastic propellers on top u know what i’m talking abt

minhyun

  • asks u to listen to him sing oH MY GOSH
  • when you guys go the park he always asks u to make a flower crown for him out of flowers he’s picked
  • one time he made a paper crown 4 u and was all like: “bc ur such a princess and princesses deserve crowns”
  • fights jisung for the mom position
  • acts like he hates when u hug him but secretly screams inside and explodes
  • complains when sungwoon holds his hand but never lets him go
  • loves helping u in the kitchen when u make them snacks !!!! does anything he can with his tiny lil hands 2 help !!!!!
  • most likely just grabs as many ingredients as he can and brings them to u
  • KEEPS BANDAIDS IN HIS POCKETS AT ALL TIMES JUST IN CASE ANYONE NEEDS ONE
  • enforces the ‘buddy system’ more than u do tbh
  • loves pokemon more than he loves his brothers 
    • hisses at u if u disrupt his pokemon catching session 
  • makes signs for his brothers when they have competitions or smth and screams the loudest 4 them
  • gets roasted often 
  • goes into (。・_・。) mode when left alone
  • please don’t leave him alone
  • actually the clingiest being alive, has to hold your hand until he falls asleep or else he’ll die
  • nags his bros to clean up 4 themselves and gets roasted >:(((
  • one time u took the kids to an amusement park (big mistake btw) and minhyun had to get a pic with every mascot and hug the life out of them 
  • just wants 2 have a good day and not be attacked™️ by his family
  • remembers everything u tell him which is a gift and a curse
    • he buys ur favourite snacks when he’s at the grocery store with his parents :’))
    • but he also remembers the time u promised to take them out to eat after u forgot him at the park
    • never forgets never forgives

jinyoung

  • has a biting issue 
    • bites people when he’s nervous 
    • or just for fun
    • one time u caught him biting jihoon and jihoon just looked u dead in the eye and said “this is normal”
  • really shy, pls praise him
  • just tell him he’s a smart boi or that his singing voice is nice and he’ll be happy for the next year
  • LOOKS UP 2 U A LOT BC U ALWAYS HELP HIM WITH HOMEWORK
  • unsure abt everything don’t ask him what ice cream flavour he wants, just get him what jihoon gets
  • always trails behind jihoon like a lil puppy
  • almost trips over their cat 28 times a day
  • questions if he really exists and if anything matters and makes u go “woah dude ur like 2”
  • nibbles on his food instead of properly eating it
  • he’s like the kids in horror movies that stare off behind you like something’s about to attack u
    • but really he just stared at the wall behind you for so long his vision blurred and he thought that was cool smh
  • convinces u to give him extra food during snack time just by smiling at u
  • is the referee for daniel vs seungwoo battles, has a whistle and everything 
    • jinyoung: *blows whistle*
    • ogniel: ??? what’s up yo
    • jinyoung: daniel wouldnt share his ice cream with me the other day so seungwoo automatically wins good job hyung (✿◠‿◠)
  • people think he’s really nice but in reality he’s too shy to say no akshakjs
  • classmate: can i have ur milk
    • jinyoung: *nervously sweats* uh,,,,
    • woojin: NO U CANNOT HAVE HIS MILK LEAVE HIM ALONE
  • everybody is apart of the protect jinyoung club™

sungwoon

  • easily excited 
  • show him something new and watch him screech
  • gets jealous easily and gets all >:/// 
  • sharing ?? what’s that sorry not in sungwoon’s vocabulary 
  • one time he mumbled “it’s high noon” in his sleep and u highkey considered quitting the job
  • cries the hardest when an animal dies in a movie 
  • has a sad face as his resting face so ur always concerned 
    • “sungwoon are u ok ??”
    • “ya i’m just thinking abt what we’re having for dinner tonight :))”
    • “,,,,,,,,”
  • sings his words 
    • says it’s for ‘vocal practice’
  • eats anything u give to him
  • fell in love with u on your first day when u gave them all brownies
  • demands 2 be carried so now u have to worry abt daehwi AND sungwoon falling off ur back/out of ur arms
  • eats everything with a fork
  • like he probably eats pizza with a fork
  • has a fidget spinner, u can’t look him in the eye when he has it with him
  • can always be found with his face smushed up against someone’s shoulder
  • wears bucket hats 
  • i’m just putting that out there 
  • whenever u babysit you either never see him at all or he’s always in your sight
  • hides in the same exact place every time y'all play hide and seek and he wonders how he’s always caught first 
  • u can always tell when he’s tired when he walks into a wall bc his eyes were half-closed

wanna one (as a whole)

  • their parents told them they were really musically gifted and that they all liked singing and rapping and stuff like that so u expected them to always be doing so
  • but no
  • all they do is scream and do girl group dance moves around the house
  • daehwi and jisung have fights over who does the moves better
    • “hyung they don’t dance like that!”
    • “yes they do!”
    • “no ur ugly!”
    • “UR UGLY”
  • daily dance offs to fight for who gets what 
    • “I WANT THE MILK U GOT IT LAST TIME”
    • “DANCE BATTLE ME RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW U- U- JERK !!”
    • “:OOOOO”
  • guanlin just sits down next to u with banana milk and watches the entire fiesta unfold
  • when yall go to the playground u best believe theyre all gonna ask u to push them on the swings
  • except jihoon and jinyoung who attempt to fucking climb the tallest slide from the side bars
  • u run out of money immediately when the ice cream truck comes
  • they all buy the most expensive things but u cant resist them bc theyre just so cute
  • the younger ones always ask u to read them bedtime stories im :’))
  • all of them try to play with your hair at the same time and i dont know abt u but i dont think having 11 kids trying to braid ur hair is a good idea??
  • THEYRE ALL SO SHADY WITH EACH OTHER
  • when it’s ur birthday they INSIST that they bake smth for u
    • which ends in all the eggs being broken and the cat covered in cake batter 
    • but it’s the effort that counts :’)))
    • in the end they settle for banana milk and a cookie that they had to ask guanlin to get bc it was on the top shelf
  • all these kids are art hoes
    • asks if they can stay at the park a lil longer so they can see the sunset dsfvhsbjh
  • uncalled forehead/wrist flicking that end in battles to the death 
  • constant sibling rivalry BUT in the end, they all love each other to death and will always have each other’s backs ಥ⌣ಥ

anonymous asked:

Just had a weird spur of the moment headcanon. But bear with me for a sec... AU, where RFA is in highschool with MC, and MC is with Jumin, and one day MC is sick and doesn't show up, so Jumin sneaks into MC's room to bring her stuff and fluff ensues.

Haha, that sounds super cute! Depending on how close they were (I’m assuming they were super tight in the au you were suggesting) I don’t think it’s unlikely. (I accidentally read this wrong the first time and wrote them as good friends that fall in love??? I’m sorry I can’t read to save my life sometimes??? *facepalm* I hope you enjoy this anyway) Maybe it would go something like this? (Also I’m making them all the same age because I’m a lazy):


MC was feeling abysmal as she closed the door to her bedroom, cradling a tissue box in her arms as she returned to bed. Looking to her phone, she noticed class was over in the time she had inadvertently passed out on the couch downstairs. She opened the messenger to ask Jumin for the homework– as they shared most of their classes being honor students–when her window slid open of its own accord to reveal a familiar head of dark hair. Her hand flew up to cover her mouth as she laughed at his unceremonious entrance, unrepentant as each limb and a bag followed.

“Oh my God, Jumin, you did not.” She managed in between giggles.

His deadpan expression softened into a sheepish yet devilish smirk. “You have your ways of avoiding your mother, I have mine. Please excuse the intrusion.”

She waved him off, unperturbed. They’d been climbing in each others houses for years now, they were hardly strangers. “You could have just emailed everything to me, you didn’t have to come all this way. I don’t want to get you sick too.” MC insisted with a sniffle. More than that, she didn’t want him to get in trouble with his father over something so trivial.

“Where’s the fun in that? I’ll be fine.” He grinned, removing a neat folder from his bag with everything she needed to catch up, she was sure. “For you.”

“Thank you,” She placed the small stack of papers on her nightstand. “How long did you have to fight Zen to be the one to bring it to me?” MC asked dryly.

She was delighted to hear Jumin laugh, holding up his hands from their original position crossed over his chest. She loved it when it was just the two of them. He always seemed so comfortable, so liberated compared to his usual withdrawn reticence. “You got me, I had to beat him at rock paper scissors before he relented. Which makes no sense considering we live a block away from each other. In terms of efficiency, I was the most viable option.”

MC smiled. Jihyun was right, he was ever the scientist. But she thought the practicality was adorable, and it made him a lot more honest than most. It was refreshing that she never had to wonder what he was thinking since he was always open about it.

“Wait just a second, you must be thirsty after running here and climbing that tree. Let me get some water,” She exited before he could protest and returned with two water bottles, one to keep her hydrated and the other to make sure he was drinking properly too. Though she doubted he had problems with his health considering how he regimented just about everything.

“Thanks.” His voice was quiet, low. The sound of it never failed to soothe her, even now as her head throbbed slightly from oversleeping.

There was a comfortable silence for a while, their gazes wandering, most often to each other. A light blush often colored their cheeks whenever either was caught staring, accidentally or not, and Jumin’s hand came up to rub the nape of his neck. 

MC was curious at the sight of the gesture. He only did that when he was nervous. “Is something wrong, Jumin?“ Was his stepmother acting up again? “You know you can always stay here if you’re not comfortable at home.” She said softly, her hand reaching out to cover his in the hopes of comforting him. She had wanted to talk some sense into his parents for a long time, but she knew they would only take out whatever she said on him the moment she was gone. She hated how powerless she was to stop it. Anything she could do to help, he had but to ask.

He shook his head. “No it’s not that, but thank you, MC.” His words were suffused with a warm gratitude that was somewhat shy. “It’s…actually…” His gaze moved to the floor, lips pursed until he managed to force the words out. “Would you have preferred it if Zen was the one to come instead of me?” She could see the faintest of blushes coloring the tips of his ears.

“Much as I would appreciate whoever came to deliver the things I need, I think I’d have to say no.” She hedged. His head shot up immediately to stare at her in surprise as her hands fiddled with the sheets, pulling at a stray thread on one of the corners as she her face flamed.

A slow smile she didn’t see overtook his face, more radiant than any he’d worn all his life. “Truly?” He asked. 

She nodded, mortified and unable to look at him and down-spiraling as usual. God he was going to think she was one of those crazy kids at school desperate to get his attention for all the wrong reasons, nice going you idiot. As if he doesn’t have enough girls hitting on him on a daily basis! Way to ruin everything, all he wanted was a real friend and you had to take it too far, stop being selfish and–

Her thoughts were halted in their tracks when she felt the velvet brush of lips and the lightest pressure on her forehead, her eyes widening and her cheeks darkening even further. All she could do was blink and stare at his crisp white collar, mouth slightly agape as he took a step back. He was blushing a bit too, despite his indulgent smile.

“Before you self-destruct,” He began, knowing all too well how she overthought things sometimes. Her brows would knit and her face would scrunch up in quiet horror in the most endearing way, though he always halted her before she could go too far with it and come to the wrong conclusion. “I like you too,” He revealed, his voice no louder than a murmur.

“O-oh.” Was all she could manage to say. Holy crap holy crap holy crap this was not a drill, Jumin liked her plain ass back. At this rate, she was going to need a hospital for an entirely different reason. She had liked him for a long time, but never wanted to make him uncomfortable with the expectation of something more considering the kinds of experiences he’d had with women all his life.

“But the most important thing right now is your health,” He continued, wrapping a spare blanket from the closet around her shoulders. “We can address this more as soon as you’ve rested. In the meantime, don’t hesitate to call on me if you need anything.” His voice was as stern as it was sincere, largely because MC was stubborn to a troublesome degree about asking for help. He didn’t want her to hesitate, even if all she wanted was to talk. “Feel better, MC.” Shooting her another one of his delightful small smiles, he climbed back out and down the tree, heading home to tell his father about another impromptu student council meeting no doubt.

Her hands came up to cover her face, trying to hold in the shrill scream climbing up her throat. He had to be the cutest combination of awkward and charming she’d ever seen. Hoping it wasn’t a fever dream and giddy for tomorrow, she got to work on the day’s assignments so that she could go to bed early.

She pulled the blanket he had retrieved for her closer in the hopes that she would warm more quickly, which made her notice it was her favorite one: the gray one. The one she had draped over his shoulders when he’d appeared one night, eyes wide and terrified; desperate to be as far away from what she assumed to be his home. It had been raining heavily and she hadn’t known him all that well yet, but he had seemed trustworthy enough at school. So she pulled him inside without a second thought despite the lack of explanation. She then led him to the living room and asked him to wait in the quietest voice she could manage, only moving when she saw him nod imperceptibly. She didn’t ask him any questions, just prepared Earl Grey tea–thank God Jihyun had gushed about him to her– and chose the blanket because it had matched his striking eyes. The ones that had seemed so dull and clouded when she first met him, like the mist that guards a heavily fortified fortress. After pouring the tea and setting up the couch for him to stay the night, she remembered asking him if he wanted a book or a movie or something to help him fall asleep, to which he replied that she pick her favorite movie. The next two hours was spent watching Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. She’d hoped the music and the intricate artwork would help him grow drowsy, but it was clear he was wide awake throughout even though he was still as a statue. She would have been worried if it hadn’t been for the sound of his even breathing filling the silence. He’d seemed remarkably poised and implacable at school, like nothing could ever faze or deter him. So what on Earth had the power to make him withdraw into himself to this degree? 

When the movie was over she turned off the lights and found the newest book she’d intended to read, pulling up a chair deliberately in between him and the front door. Soon after that, his eyes closed and the next time she looked up he was sound asleep. Her jaw set at the sight, remembering the strange but strong scent of perfume that clung to his chest when she’d wrapped the blanket around him. If anybody came looking for him–no matter who it was– she was going straight to the police. That morning, they left the house and she accompanied him to retrieve his things before they left for school as if nothing had ever happened.

To this day, she thanked her rarely lucky stars that her own family had been gone for the weekend and she had been able to let him stay somewhere safe for the night.

After the incident she noticed little changes in his demeanor each day; a pencil appearing on her desk before she could ask for one, a question she’d written while taking notes answered in an elegant script on her page when she returned to class from the restroom, notes brought to her house when she was ill just like today. His attempts at conversation were still tentative, but much more apparent than before, and she always responded with her full attention. It didn’t take long for their conversations to run deeper than they ever would have imagined, engrossed to the point where entire hours would pass without their knowledge. Soon they were inseparable; she couldn’t remember being so close to somebody all her life.

She buried her face in the blanket, the memory from two years ago bittersweet. Her heart would always break at the thought of what he might have lost that night, but she always hoped he would remember it for the same reasons that she did. The start of a wonderful friendship and the slow emergence of a lifelong love.


I’m sorry I kind of got carried away with this AU idea, but I hope you like it anyway??? Thank you for enabling my endless thirst somebody please protect this boy he is all I think about. 

I was just thinking vaguely about Doctor Who and I realized that I would be the Most Tiresome companion because I? am obsessed with historical fashion.  So it would be like, “C’mon Blythe, it’s fine, I’m just wearing this!”  “Oh well it’s all very well and good, you’re a man, but people are going to notice a woman in a mini skirt!  Now shut up and help me get this dress on so I can go out there and interrogate William Shakespeare about how old Hamlet was supposed to be.  And why there’s a bear in The Winter’s Tale.  And what’s up with that one dude in Twelfth Night.  Do you think it would be weird if I asked him to autograph my Complete Works?  I brought it with me, just in case.  Oh shit this shift’s neckline is totally wrong for this time period, turn around for a sec while I take it off.  What do you think of the themes of time and aging in his sonnets?”

i’ve been thinking about what alt genocide route papyrus fight where he fights you instead of sans would ACTUALLY be like after spending a lot of time scrolling through @papyrus-knows and i’ve had some ideas bear with me here for a sec.

as always, even after killing basically everyone in the underground including sans, it wouldn’t be easy for papyrus to change his views on mercy and sparing anyone and believing they can change. however, he would realize that just sparing you from the beginning won’t work. instead, he’d attack you until he brought you down to 1HP then do the same thing as pacifist and neutral routes: lock you up, though not in his shed since you’d get out of that.

papyrus WAS going easy on you in the pacifist and neutral routes; he attacks specifically to get you to a low hp and then capture you, (which is a sharp contrast to how every other monster excepting toriel actively tries to kill you). in a genocide fight, going easy wouldn’t be an option, but he still wouldn’t be trying to kill you. you get a small glimpse of his ability to be a little harder on you with the “normal attack” right after his attempt to use his special attack (an attack that, btw, we never see. it’s probably a really cool attack tbh)

i like the idea that he’d always give you the option to spare him throughout the fight, but never lowers his defense so as to let you one hit kill him. in an action similar to but different from sans’ “spare” the bone wall would go up but would bring you down to one and then you’d wake up captured.

there is proof that papyrus can possibly increase his defense considering that the lower his hp gets in a normal fight the higher his defense gets, so in a theoretical genocide fight his defense would be insanely high from the outset because papyrus knows you’re dangerous. all your attacks only deal one, and he has a high hp in the first place so the genocide fight would be similarly annoyingly difficult to the sans fight.

possibly, a genocide route pap fight could include a new battle dynamic: constantly changing physics meant to surprise you into attacks. unlike sans who only changes the direction gravity goes to push you into bones, papyrus puts you through whole sections where the controls are sideways or upside-down, or sections where the controls are backwards (my least favorite thing in games!)

there is also some evidence papyrus is not aware of the resets but remembers things from past timelines that he experiences in nightmares. so in a gen pap fight things you’ve gotten used to are just slightly off from usual that can trip you up.

in the act section you can taunt him with sans’ death (this brings down his defense a little for that turn, but this only works a couple times) or tell him he’s an idiot for his world view (he’s heard this many times, and this doesn’t shake him at all). his check is different then normal gen route. instead of “forgettable” it states “the easiest enemy. even now he won’t kill you. idiot.” the atk and def read the same, but the def stat is wrong and his atk is changeable according to how pap chooses it to be so CHECK tells you basically nothing. he has amazing control over how much damage he does.

he also HAS gaster blasters, they’re a different shape as sans’ but basically the same, but he doesn’t use them until later into the fight, and seems nervous to use them if you’re low on health (presumably he has less control over the damage they do)

galacticsodaartz  asked:

Who is Damian?? I'm sorry I don't know him and seen him in a few places X'D confused

He’s the Bear’s perky mailman! Just a very minor character on the show
Damian was a name me and my friend gave him when we characterized him together

Here’s my tag for him! I have posts explaining some more in there + content with him in it (canon and otherwise)

I See Wings Pt. 1

@oswinsoufflegirlie request: What about a supernatural fic where humans can only see an angels wings if they are that angels soulmate? Hope this fits! Sorry for the long wait, but I wanted to take some time on this one. I’m splitting it into two parts so I don’t make it too long.

Summary: You ask Castiel about soulmates and discover some interesting news.

Setting: Motel room, season 6-7ish (?)

Age: Whatever you feel like works pretty much. I did it around 16-19

Warnings: None

Tags: @the-third-winchester-warrior @winchesters-favorite-girl @fantasticburninglakes @oswinsoufflegirlie @ally-miller16 @haleyhay96

You walk down the dusty street away from the roadside motel, hands in your jean pockets, reflecting on all Castiel had told you. The moon beams down as you’re left alone with your thoughts. Stars glitter gently on the dark sky. The case you and your brothers were working had dealt with some crazed teenage witches. You shudder at remembering; you could taste tuna in your mouth from when they turned you into a cat. Those girls had been obsessed with finding their ‘soulmate’. But, when finding your soulmate turns into a near cannibalistic adventure of doom, it’s time to stop…two angels, three victims, four mutilated cow corpses, a close shave with a guillotine, and a desperate prayer to Cas later, the situation had gotten under control. Sam and Dean thought the whole soulmate thing was a whole truckload of crap, but something inside you had doubts. You think back to about ten minutes ago…
“Cas?” Sam and Dean were grabbing food and supplies, so it was now or never.
“Yes, Y/N?”
You bite your lip, hesitant to ask. “Do you know if…I mean, are there really-”
“Soulmates?” Cas finishes. He tilts his head while looking at you. “That is what you’re asking about, right?”
You nod. “I kinda don’t want Sam and Dean to know I did. They don’t exactly buy into this stuff, so can they…not know I asked?”
“You fear your adopted brothers will think of you differently.”
Your mouth twitches into a petite smile while you roll your eyes. “Stupid, I know, but I want to find out…I can’t believe I’m even saying this. Do soulmates exist?”
Cas takes a seat on a motel room bed. “Yes.”
You sit across on the adjacent bed. “Really? It wasn’t just some witchy bs those girls were doing?”
“I…am not sure how to respond to that, but yes. Soulmates are real. How you can tell, however, is not a thing of mystical arts. There are clear signs whether or not someone is your soulmate.”
“Okay. So, tell me.” You place your elbows on your knees. “I’m listening.”
Cas knits his eyebrows together in concern. “Is there a specific reason you’re concerned with soulmates? The knowledge behind discovering soulmates can be dangerous, as you witnessed earlier today.”
“It’s not like I’m planning on going crazy like those freaky girls. That’s just messed up.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“Neither did you,” you rebuttal.
Cas stares at you. “You Winchesters. Such a stubborn bunch of humans.” He sighs. “Tell me why you’re interested and I’ll tell you about soulmates.”
You blush a little. “My mom, when I was little, she told me about the Greek myth. How people were originally created together and then Zeus split them in two and now people wander the Earth for their other half.” You continue a tad embarrassed. “It was my favorite bedtime story as a child. I wanted to believe…someone was my other half.”
“You are not alone, Y/N,” Cas comforts. “I’m not entirely sure on the truth to that myth. Greek myths are different than other lore , but the idea is correct, more or less.” Cas stands up. “A soulmates usually find each other through the actions of a Cupid. Whether that bond is between two humans depends on the situation.”
“Wait, back up,” you interject. “Soulmates don’t need to be the same species?”
“No, they do not. Humans with werewolves, vampires, shifters, even angels can be soulmates. There are obvious signs for the creature based-”
“Just, let me stop you for a sec. Does that mean you have a soulmate?”
Cas looks uncomfortable. “Perhaps. I do not know what mark they would bear to signify they are mine, but I suppose it is possible.” The angel paused before continuing. “Humans with angels is one of the more rare combinations.”
“Okay. How does one tell?”
“A human’s soul will sometimes radiate a frequency Angels can detect. Other times, souls will look different. In your terms, it would be best described as color.”
“So I could have like a pink or a green soul?”
“No. A soul looking like that would have a completely different problem,” Cas states matter-of-factly.
“Oh.”
He doesn’t seem to pick up on your minor disappointment. “I have seen a soul described as radiating infrared or ultraviolet.” He leans over like he was sharing a secret. “The different colors can mean different things.”
“Uh-huh…”
“But the most significant indicator of a soulmate comes from the perspective of a human.” Castiel’s eyes began to shine.
You feel a burst of fear pierce your heart. “Cas?”
“It’s all right, Y/N.” His voice radiates through the room. Ringing echoed off the walls. You watch as light filled the space and a dark outline you had seen before appeared.
Angel wings.
You shield your eyes from the brightness. “Okay Cas! You can turn it off now!”
The angel heeds your wish. The room returns to normal. “I gave you consent to see my wings, manifesting them in a form visible to the human eye.” Cas walks over to you. He takes your hands and lifts you from your sitting position on the bedspread. “If a human had an angel for their soulmate, the angel needs not to change their wings for the human to see.”
You take a deep breath, amazed. “Soulmates see wings.”
“Constantly.”
You’re shocked from this new knowledge. “Wow.”
Cas smiles at you. “Yes. It truly is amazing knowledge.”
To be honest, it was a little much for your brain. “I-I…I need a minute to process this.” You grab your coat, a hamster feeling it’s going to pop out of your chest. “When Sam and Dean get back, tell them I’ve gone for a walk. You run out the door before Cas could protest.
That brings you back to where we started. Nightfall on the dirty road leading away from the safe motel and you, strolling along the side, wrapped up in the thought of this new knowledge.
“Soulmates. Real soulmates,” you think to yourself. You’re so excited. “They’re real. And angels can be soulmates.” You stare up at the twinkling stars. You can’t contain the smile on your face. It bursts with a brilliance matching the moon. “Well, there you go Mom. Real soulmates. You and Dad weren’t just a fairytale after all.”
You hear a familier flutter behind you. You turn around with a sigh. “I just needed a minute to myself Cas.” You stop, immediately reaching for your knife. The angel behind you is not Castiel. You have enough time to register one thing about your attacker before you black out.
I see wings…

I’m pretty close to 300 followers. Thanks so much, yall! I kinda feel like oversharing so bear with me for a sec. I’m on the trans spectrum (f2m of some sort). I came out as bi when I was just 12 years old, twelve years ago. I have conquered the opiate carfentanil. I’ve been writing for 15 years, playing/reading music for 12 years, and writing sheet music for 10 years.

I don’t know what my dx is as of now, but last time I was checked out, I was told I’ve got BPD AND Bipolar 2 (its as fucked as you imagine), C-PTSD, and an anxiety disorder that’s a bit beyond GAD. I also have tonic-clonic seizures.

Anyway, the point of this is to say, if you’re ever feeling super awful, PLEASE MESSAGE ME. I’ve been through a lot and I empathize with a lot of real shit. I’m here for you.

It’s amazing what people will do and say when they’re fucked up on chems. F!Survivor/Hancock.

She was already three hits down and four glasses in before she finally managed to mutter something around her drooping cigar. Hancock was even further in the haze, his world muffled until it barely existed around him. They slumped against each other, sinking into the rotting couch, taking in the sounds of the night no sober person could ever hear. His coat was thrown somewhere, another soft pile of black in the dark, and she was down to her shorts and a shirt likely stolen from Danse. It was way too big and way too clean to be hers.

“Hey, John. Johnny.” She suddenly chuckled, nudging him with an elbow. He grunted in reply. “What, uh…what do you call a cow with no legs?”

Keep reading

I know everyone and their mother seems to be screaming about this show right now - so for those of you who don’t watch it, I’m sorry, just bear with me a sec. I’ll try to keep things vague for those of you avoiding spoilers.

But you know the one thing about Yuri on Ice that gets me? 

How normalized everything is. 

For example, that moment in Episode 7 where Viktor very openly expresses his affection for Yuuri in front of an international audience? I was honestly expecting shit to hit the fan in Episode 8, at least to some degree. Here is a male celebrity (a Russian male celebrity, for that matter) at the peak of his career and with a large fan base… some of whom blame Yuuri for taking him away from them in order to coach. I was sort of dreading the backlash that they might face as a result or at the very least the judgmental glances they may get from assholes who don’t approve. The figure skating community alone is known to be pretty damn hostile toward even the mere suggestion of homosexuality.

Except they didn’t. The story just continued.

And now in Episode 10… that moment in the restaurant where the congratulatory announcement was made after a misunderstanding? No one questioned it. No one second-guessed it. A whole restaurant of strangers clapped for two people they presumably did not know but could clearly see sitting at the table and no one batted an eye at the fact that they were applauding for two men. 

While there is definitely a need in fiction to explore the struggle, the backlash, the hatred and homophobia that same-sex couples face… when I think about it, that narrative has dominated almost every piece of LGBTQ fiction I’ve personally encountered, to the point where I feel like it can overshadow the relationship at the center of it all.

But in this show, it doesn’t. You just get to enjoy them for who they are and how they care about one another and celebrate each step they take along the way.

And that is so fucking refreshing.

What it is like to suffer from Anorexia or Bulimia


My brain is sick, its poorly, its hurting and its weeping. My brain makes my body stop and unable to pick up a fork, my body will tremble when it hears the words “sandwich, spaghetti, pizza or burger.” My brain is being bullied. But I cant tell a teacher that so and so is bullying me in the playground,  as it is not a person who controls me and sends me the hate messages. Its a disease. “your too big, your not going to succeed, lose the weight.” My brain is sick, my brain sends out messages for me to run 15 kilometres, then swim for hours then cycle 10 miles, all these activities my brain tells me to do consecutively. My brain is sick. It tells me that if I was thinner, I would be prettier, happier, popular, successful. My brain is sick. It makes me not trust people, it makes me not hug people incase they can feel the fat around my stomach that I am so insecure about. It makes me paralysed when I see there is one extra Rice Krispie on my plate. My sickness has two sides. My brain tells me to eat cake, ice cream, pizza, bread, spaghetti, custard creams all in one sitting. My brain tells me it’s ok to eat. Its more then ok to eat, food is fantastic, its my frenzy, my drug. My brain turns me into a polar bear attacking its prey, or a lion hunting it’s kill, however for me the prey is the chocolates on the top shelf of the cupboard and the predator is me. But then I freeze, the only thing that I can hear is the ticking of the clock, no voices, complete silence. The silence lasts about 15 secs until the tsunami of voices begin. “What did you just do, you’ve made a big mistake, your thighs are growing right now, stop them,  stop them, look how big your stomach is getting.” My hands begin to shake, my stomach bloats, the feeling of fullness gets larger and larger. Until I end up stopping and staring at the water at the bottom of the toilet bowl with my fingers down my throat. The water is no longer clear, its filled with blood which drips from my throat and vomit that is dripping down fingers. My brain is sick. My brain tells my feet to step on the scale and the bullies start sending me hate messages again. The cycle repeats. My brain is sick. My organs are sick. My bones are told they are at high risk of osteoporosis. My doctors say its time to start fighting for your life and hand me an orange. I have not eaten or drank water in 5 days. I am informed my chances are slim and that this illness could kill me. My body sits in a wheelchair whilst people tell me “mental illness’s are for attention.” I get taken in ambulances almost fortnightly now, but its ok because my illness tells me “I deserve it” “I am the best eating disorder patient because I am the sickest.” My brain is sick. It makes me get my rights taken away from me and moves me to a hospital 2 and a half hours from everyone I know.

I gain 10 kilos. My body is healed. My brain is sick. It tells me I have an obesity problem, it tells me I will suffer from diabetes, high cholesterol. It tells me I am weak I am sick, I will be healthy if I lose 20 kilos, because then I won’t have the obesity problem anymore and I won’t be in a 1:3 range of the obesity epidemic England has. My doctors tell me I’ve worked so hard and I am finally at a healthy weight, they congratulate me. I don’t understand. My weight has gone up I am not healthy anymore. Tears drip down my face. I am sick. The voices are louder. “YOU ARE NOT GAINING ANYMORE, LOSE NOW YOU FAT COW, STOP GAINING. YOUR DISGUSTING, NOBODY LIKES YOU.” My nurses tell me, “its ok to cry.” that it is ok to relapse however it is never ok to give up, that the fact I’ve hit a healthy weight “is an achievement.” However my head tells me the extreme opposite. My brain is sick. I do not know what is rational. I am strapped in and on a roller-coaster that has the record number of loop de loops. My eating disorder is not a physical illness its a mental illness. My brain is sick. I’m on home leave and I see my family and friends. They see I’ve gained weight and they ask when will I be out of hospital and that I have done so well now that I have recovered from anorexia and bulimia. Why is it assumed that because my body has recovered my brain has? My brain is sicker then ever. I have not managed solid food in 2 weeks, relying on liquid calories because my brain will not send communication signals for my hands to pick up a fork, however I am a healthy weight so I am recovered right? This is not the case. MY BRAIN IS SICK. I do like food, I love pizza, french fries, burgers. I don’t eat lettuce leaves at every meal. I may have anorexia and bulimia but I do like food, in fact I love food. I wish I could eat food. My brain is sick.

Around once a month, I wake up. I see the real girl who stares back at me in the mirror. I do not see the fatness i’ve seen the previous night. I see the girl who loves sport, who’s passionate about her education, who is intelligent and cares about others. I see the girl who is fighting against anorexia and bulimia. I see the girl who’s trying so hard to overcome the disease. My brain is sick, however I am not giving up the fight for health and happiness.

I’m just gonna be really salty for a sec so bear with me

I’m honestly really pissed by how kiznaiver treated Yuta Tsuguhito. I’m genuinely really pissed at the missed potential and how he really only exists just to interact with Maki and bring her out of her shell (by constantly flirting with her, which she rejects, but eventually they Have to get together because the dude has a crush right!!!)

But like….Yuta had no real friends, hides his insecurities and (arguable) eating disorder behind a fake personality that he uses to get the attention and acceptance he wants. He had no idea what actual friendships/relationships were like bc he never experienced them and he’s satisfied with what he had at the beginning and desperately tries to cling onto his image bc that’s all that matters to him. Because that’s what he thinks would make him happy. He likes Maki bc she’s pretty, and only ever makes the effort to talk to her over the course of the show. Despite him becoming more open and nice as the show went on, it only ever came around bc of Maki and like, yes it’s nice that he does genuinely care about her and grew to like her less because of her looks and more because of who she is as a person, but it doesn’t make sense to me? The show pushed the fact that Yuta was friends with the other characters which would have a lot more bearing if he actually spent more time with them and the show SHOWED that. I don’t think I remember seeing a single scene where he interacted alone with any character that isn’t Maki. I felt like the show treated Yuta less as a character and more Maki’s pretty knight in shining armour who gets over everything he went through, all his insecurities and issues just bc the girl he likes stopped rejecting him. A) it pushes the idea that if a guy keeps pursuing a girl even if she says no, he’ll still win her over eventually, and b) that all your problems, mental illnesses and trauma is immediately solved and righted by romantic love. It doesn’t sit right with me at all.
Not to mention the cast (Maki especially) has made fun of him so many times and never really treated his issues seriously, while everyone else (bar Hisomu, which is a whole other, bitter, topic) had their issues and grievances respected for the most part. Not a single one of them has ever apologized to him. Not Maki for constantly making fun of him, for attempting to sexually assault him (but seriously, would she ever lmao, with her gross comment about how she wants to ‘fatten him up’ LIKE WHAT THE FUCK). Not Tenga for punching him and making fun of him for being a douchey pretty boy even though it’s obvious he isn’t as they get to know each other more.
Just, fuck. I’m so mad @ this show for treating my fave kiznaiver character (besides Mutsumi and Kazunao) like shit. I’m just so bitter and he deserves so much better than this

Better Safe Than Sorry

Pairing/Characters: 2009!phan

Genre: Angst, kinda, Fluff, kinda, Comfort, kinda. DRABBLE.

Word Count: 673 (yikes short I know)

Warnings: Implied family issues

Description: Sometimes Dan’s parents argue. A lot. Phil wishes he could do something to help.

“Dan?”

He could faintly hear Phil’s voice coming from the headphones that had slipped off of his head in his rush to turn and look towards the bedroom door. It was still closed, but tonight it was so loud that it might as well not even been there.

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the light was just a lie

Bear with me here: we’re not getting a true deus ex machina.

I loved loved loved Robbie and Rob’s interpretation of God this episode, but it did strike me as odd how they kept flipping from ‘oh my god he’s hilarious and cute and precious’ to ‘wait a sec he’s dangerous and dark’, only to have such a quick turnaround where Chuck decides to save everyone and reveal himself to Sam and Dean. Now, this could just be because we only have 3 episodes left after this, and it was necessary to push the plot along, but I have more faith in both Robs than that. Robbie Thompson is very good at using foreshadowing, at putting what appear to be innocuous details, particularly in dialogue, that turn out to be super important later. Both the writing and Rob’s acting made it very clear to me that something is up here.

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Neighbors - Curtis Brothers (Part 2/Request)

Part 1

A paperback novel splayed out to your side, you peacefully sleep nestled in the grain of the porch. The warmth of the summer too tempting to resist closing your eyes. Dreams of ocean waves and sparkling sand saturate your vision. The seagulls flying overhead, cawing lightly, begin to sound like Soda. Wake up. The waves tickle your feet with their icy fingertips. Wake up! You think there’s something weird about the seagulls, you’re confused as the water reaches for your waist. (Y/N)! The waves strain to your neck, almost engulfing you; you’re hysterical as you try to escape. “(Y/n)!” Your eyes fly open to see Soda standing over you.

“Wake up, (y/n). We’ve got things to do.”

“What?” You jolt upright, breathing heavily, “What happened?” Looking around frantically you see Ponyboy standing at the fence, the red highlights in his hair gleaming in the late afternoon sun.

“Nothing. But if you don’t hurry up we’re going to miss the movie. I’m sure everyone’s already there by now.”

You groggily search around you trying to get your bearings, wiping the little bit of drool off your cheek. “Yeah, okay. Just a sec.” Soda steps off the porch towards the gate, holding it open as they wait for you.

You stretch as you stand, shaking off the dream, “Wanna take the bikes?”

“Pony, can you ride on the handlebars?” He nods at Soda, “Want me to grab ‘em?”

“I got it,” bouncing off the steps you head for the back of the house, a minute later you’re wheeling two shiny red Schwinn bikes out. Soda takes one from you, settling into the seat as Ponyboy adjusts himself on the handlebars. He looks over his shoulder to you, “Ready?”

You’re already mounted, “Let’s hit it.”

Dirt flies as your tires gain traction, spraying pebbles everywhere. The wind blows coolly in your face, the light of the day slowly fading in front of you. The rays blinding as they slip through gaps in the leaves.

The boys are already waiting outside the theater as Soda said with the exception of Darry, to your disappointment. You and Soda skid to a halt, letting Ponyboy jump off before setting your bikes near the entrance.

Two-Bit’s already drunk, shouting obscenities before you ever take your seats. Dally and Steve gladly join in, making dirty comments at the girls in the front rows. You dip into the last seat beside Ponyboy, the remaining aisle seat left empty.

The curtain pulls away to reveal the huge screen, the viewers shushing one another as the movie reel flips on.

Ponyboy leans into you, whispering, “Your boyfriend’s here.”

Confused, you open your mouth to question him, but a hand sliding across the back of your chair silences you. You turn to see Darry taking up the aisle seat, arm leisurely spread behind your chair and legs kicked out in front of him.

“Hey,” his smells like heaven so close to you, “sorry I’m late.”

You can only manage a tight nod, rendered speechless and body stiffening.

“What’s the matter, (y/n)?” Ponyboy nudges you, smirking.

Shut your mouth, you threaten through the slits of your eyes.

“Just don’t miss the movie.”

“What?” Your whisper a harsh bullet in the air.

“You know,” he puckers his lips making kissy faces. His painful grunt begins the movie.

You’re unable to really focus on what’s happening on screen with Darry so close to you. He smells so damn good and the heat off his arm makes the goosebumps on your neck surface. The hour and a half seems to disappear; you’re surprised when the lights come back on.

The gang shuffles out, Two-Bit slightly more sober. You stand outside the theater discussing plans.

“Want a ride home, Soda?” Darry’s tight black shirt making his muscles pop and you blush.

“Nah, the rest of us are heading over to a party. Buck’s throwing it at his place, right Dal?”

Dally’s lighting a cigarette, “He says he’s getting a couple kegs.”

“My kindof party,” Two-Bit’s words still somewhat slurred.

“How much more drunk can you get, Two-Bit?”

“Kid,” Two-Bit addresses Ponyboy’s dig, “you ain’t seen nothin’.”

“Whatever, man,” Ponyboy rolls his eyes. “Johnny, you coming with us?”

Dally wraps his arm around Johnny’s neck, “No way, he’s coming with us.” Johnny gasps his goodbyes as Dally drags him off.

Steve slaps Ponyboy on the back, “See ya’, doofuses!”

“A three syllable word, I’m impressed.” Steve shots him a death glare, but struts away with the group.

Ponyboy turns back to you, rubbing his side, “Why did you have to punch me like that, by the way?”

“You deserved it,” you replied simply.

As the two of you take to your bikes he whines, “Why? Because you’re in love with Darry?”

You give a panicked look at the fading group, “Hush!”

Ponyboy grins slyly, “(Y/n) and Darry sittin’ in a tree.”

“Shut up!” You scream over you shoulder, taking off down the road.

“K-I-S”

“No!” You pedal furiously away, Ponyboy struggling in the distance to catch up, as the sun fades to dusk behind you.

Part 3