Could you please write some Jackcrutchie at Disney or something? Maybe with dealing with his disability in such a crowded place?
Sorry it took so long to get to this. I’ve got one month left in this semester and it is killing me. Ugh. Anyway, to all other anons, I am getting to your stories. Please, just be a little patient. They’ll be here. Anyway, Disney. Let’s do this.
Crutchie took his place in the line to get churros. That’s all Katherine had told them to do: eat the churros at Disneyland. No rides she recommended, no shows. Just churros. Not that Crutchie would complain. It was a fabulous excuse for a cinnamon-sugary treat.
The line had queued up rather quickly and, though Crutchie wasn’t stationary for very long, the line certainly wasn’t moving faster than a crawl. Some large man in a sweat-stained gray shirt was demanding the employee give him a free churro because he had already bought the “goddamn tickets to the park and didn’t that come with a godforsaken churro?” Crutchie sighed. It would be a long day in the Happiest Place on Earth.
As he stood there and waited, soft whispers from behind him caught his attention. “No, it’s to get passes. You fake a limp or something and then they let you skip all the lines.”
“That’s stupid. Just stand in line with the rest of us.”
Crutchie bristled at the comments, but was saved from having to comment by the woman in front of him taking her churros and leaving. Forcing a smile onto his face, Crutchie greeted the worker kindly. “Can I get two churros, please?”
Behind him, Crutchie heard, “Bet he tries to get them for free, too.”
The worker must not have heard, because she simply smiled, handed him the churros, and accepted the money. Crutchie turned, glaring at the whisperers behind him. Both were teenagers, probably just barely in high school. “Just a pair of idiots,” Crutchie muttered to himself. He just needed to get back to where Jack was watching their stuff, eat the churros, and forget all of this had happened.
Just as he edged past the two teenagers, one of the boys stuck his foot out, catching the tip of Crutchie’s forearm crutch. Crutchie tried to maintain his balance with his other crutch, but the other boy kicked at that one as well. Crutchie hit the hot cement hard, the churros flattened instantly between his chest and the ground. He lay there for a moment, wincing in pain; he hadn’t been able to catch his fall quick enough and his chin had taken the brunt of the impact. There would surely be a bruise, Crutchie realized as he tenderly worked his jaw and tested its movement.
As Crutchie refocused on his surroundings, he noticed a crowd of curious onlookers had gathered around him. Someone kept asking if he was okay and Crutchie finally managed to push himself up into a sitting position. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he grunted, rubbing at his jaw. He glanced at the two snickering teenagers, who didn’t even have the decency to look away guiltily.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” some old lady was asking. Someone had produced a wheelchair and Crutchie waved it away.
“I’m fine.” He stuck to the two words because he was worried that if he kept talking, the embarrassment and pain of it all would catch up to him and he’d be unable to keep the tears at bay. He wiped the crushed churros off of his shirt, dismayed at the waste of money. They had been expensive and he had just wanted to try one. Was that too much to ask for? One churro? One for him and one for Jack?
Jack. Where was he? Crutchie glanced up and blinked in surprise at two churros in his face. “Here, you can have these,” the good Samaritan offered.
“No, I’m fine,” Crutchie bit out, standing up. He wobbled slightly as his head spun at the movement, but he would be fine. When the man kept persistently trying to press the churros into Crutchie’s hand, Crutchie muttered in irritation, “No. I’m fine. I don’t want the stupid churros.”
He just wanted Jack. Where was Jack? “Let me through,” Crutchie tried, pushing through the people. He hated crowds. Why did he ever even agree to come to Disneyland? This all sucked and Crutchie just wanted to find Jack and go home. “Let me through,” he repeated and the visitors must have noticed the fire in his eyes, because they parted, letting him pass through.
Across the walkway, seated on the bench was Jack, scrolling through his phone. Crutchie quickly crossed over and collapsed on the bench next to his boyfriend. “Hey, you got churros?” Jack asked, looking up. Crutchie merely shook his head and Jack glanced at him in confusion, noting cinnamon still clinging to his shirt, the red scrapes across his chin, and the faint glimmer of tears held back in his eyes. Much softer, Jack asked, “Hey, what’s wrong? What happened?”
“I just want to go home. This place sucks,” Crutchie muttered. “You can stay, but I think I’m going to go back to the hotel.” Crutchie shifted, as if to stand up, but Jack tugged him back down.
“No, wait. What happened back there?”
Crutchie shook his head. “It doesn’t really matter, okay? Now, can I get the hotel key card? I think I left mine in the room.”
Jack started stuffing a map into his backpack. “You wanna go, we can go.”
“No, Jack, the tickets were expensive. I don’t want you to miss out just because of my stupid leg.”
“I’m not missing anything because of your leg,” Jack pointed out. “Did someone say something?”
Crutchie sighed. “It was just these two teenagers. They were idiots. Kept saying things about me faking for passes, and… After I got the churros, they tripped me and… I’m sorry,” Crutchie finished.
“For crushing the churros.” He hesitated before adding, “For holding you back with my leg.”
“Okay, for one thing,” Jack began quickly, “I don’t care about the churros. Are you okay? Did you get hurt?”
Crutchie shrugged. “I broke the fall with my jaw. My hands were full. It still stings a little.”
Jack gently leaned forward, kissing Crutchie’s jaw. “There. Now it’ll get better soon.” Once Crutchie had smiled at that, Jack continued, “Second, I don’t want you to ever think you’re holding me back. I don’t care whether you have one leg, two legs, or three. I love you, Crutch. Not your limbs.” He waited once more for Crutchie to smile shyly, before adding, “And, third, who tripped you, because I’m going to knock some sense into them.”
“Don’t worry ‘bout it,” Crutchie waved Jack’s concern away. “I’m fine. They’re just idiots. Let ‘em go.”
“On one condition,” Jack agreed.
“Well, two conditions, I guess.”
Crutchie laughed a little. “I don’t know. Seems a little steep, to me,” he teased.
“You don’t even know what my conditions are!” Jack cried out in indignation.
“Fine, what are your conditions?”
“I won’t go after them if you let me go get us some churros because Katherine will kill us if we don’t have any. And, if we go ride Space Mountain first.”
Crutchie studied Jack for a moment. “I don’t know… Those are pretty hard to agree to… Space Mountain?”
“Fine, what do you suggest?”
“Make it Tower of Terror and I’m yours.”
Jack frowned. “That’s in the other park,” he complained.
“Oh, shut up. We have those park-hopper passes.”
Jack relented, kissing Crutchie. “Only for you. Now come on, we’re running out of daylight!”
“It’s 9 in the morning!”
“Yeah, and this kid,” Jack said, gesturing to himself, “ain’t getting any younger!”
I’ve been rewatching my favorite shows from childhood and generally regressing back to 15, so I drew my favorite undead high school freshman. I believe this show is largely responsible for my love of pairing dark colors with glaring neons.
I tried to make his ghost form look less like a palette swap, and give
him that green glowing blood look… also made his hazmat suit actually
look sorta like hazmat suit, because skin-tight superhero outfits are
boring and I like drawing clothing folds.
What has always struck me about Danny Phantom is the potential of its bizarrely dark (if given more than two seconds of thought) premise, which is unfortunately covered in a sticky mire of Butch Hartman’s writing and baffling non-understanding of high school social politics. It’s one of those kids’ shows that really lends itself to more mature reimaginings; I wish there there was more than one fanfic about it I like, and one fanfic I can bring myself to like when I am prepared to become nauseous with genuine dread and revulsion.
Hey! Someone on Twitter posted a few pictures of "black hermione" and said it's some of her favorite hermione fanart! Some of them were drawings from you... And JK retweeted it!!
HOLY COW. I AM SPEECHLESS.
I cannot believe this. I am SO HAPPY. I am so happy that J.K. Rowling has given her blessing to how we view Hermione. I am so happy that she will be black in the Cursed Child. I am overwhelmed with good feelings.
Also she likes my art. The woman who single-handedly shaped my childhood likes my art. Excuse me.
Wherein Social Media Manager Justin Gottlieb discusses confronting title bias and seeing THE PRINCESS BRIDE (’87) for the first time
Hello! My name is Justin Gottlieb! and I made an inconceivable mistake! I passed on watching THE PRINCESS BRIDE (’87) for years simply because of its name.
I heard great things about it since childhood, but all I could picture was THE PRINCESS DIARIES (’01) and I had already hit my quota of Princess films. I really didn’t know much about the film outside of its title and never took the time to learn more about it. Just as Fred Savage’s character questions his grandfather about reading him a kissing book, the title of the film kept me from watching it. Little did I know there would be “fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, and miracles”. I immediately regretted my decision to pass on the film after recently watching it. There were so many missed opportunities to throw out a classic quote, and too many missed conversations because I hadn’t seen the film. One of my favorite quotes is when Fezzik and Inigo are rhyming on the ship as they sail away. I apologies to all my friends, family, and co-workers, but whenever someone says, “I mean it”, I will most definitely drop the line “anybody want a peanut”?
My favorite scene from THE PRINCESS BRIDE (outside of anything with Billy Crystal) is the sword fight between Mandy Patinkin’s Inigo Montoya, and Cary Elwes’ Westley. It’s that playful fighting between the characters that brought back childhood memories of battling my older sibling. I wasn’t sure who to root for when watching the scene because I liked both characters, but I knew there had to be a winner and a loser. I imagine my parents felt the same way watching my brother and I compete in school and sports.
Ignoring the film simply because of its title really was an inconceivable mistake. I should have done my homework and read about the film prior to passing judgement. They say don’t judge a book by its cover, well don’t judge a film by its title. If you haven’t seen it, now is your chance to check it out and relive all those memorable quotes with fellow moviegoers. TCM Big Screen Classics from TCM and Fathom Events are bringing it back to theaters on 10/15 and 10/18 for its 30th anniversary. You can check out tickets here: http://myt.cm/PrincessBride.
My 15-month-old son might be a little too young to go to the movies, but I can’t wait to watch it with him one day. In the meantime, I’ve realized it’s time to hire a babysitter and head to the theater with my wife to celebrate my 30th anniversary of being born. I hope to see you there!
Why would you get a permanent tattoo to a fandom you may eventually fall out of?
FANDOM?? XD this fandom sucks, no way in hell did I get this tattoo for the fandom
besides that: its aesthetically pleasing to me! Movies and shows are what makes me who I am. especially being an artist and ESPECIALLY being an animator. I still plan on getting something how to train your dragon related! (I’m just waiting for the last movie to decide what) Httyd is the reason I’m where I am today because it made me decide to become an animator.
I’m going to get the ouroboros tattoo from fullmetal alchemist in the sleeve I want to do for my leg. then howls moving castle as well.
voltron got me through a lot of hard times this past year, it was made by a studio that made my favorite childhood cartoon, its produced by dreamworks who made the animation that made me want to become an animator, and why not?? not all tattoos have to be original art or even mean something for that matter!
Not to mention, after my 21 years of living, once I like a show this much, it never leaves me. My tattoo is a basic little black symbol that I love. I can fall out of a shitty fandom but I will never stop loving an amazing show like this
All your characters are incredibly unique and diverse, which is something I really admire in your writing. How do you keep from accidentally repeating a character? And how do you create them? Thank you, and it's so cool to see my favorite childhood author on tumblr! (My dad extends the same exclamations of fangirling in the background, and a thanks for creating so many good female heroes and just heroes in general.) (And White Tiger was great!!)
Well, I often start with a picture. I sometimes worry about secondary and minor characters getting repetitious. But the major ones, I can always go back and look and check against the newer characters and see if I’m repeating myself. The problem is, after a certain number of books, they do start to wrap together. Fortunately that’s what I have editors for!
I start with a picture, and actor, an artist, someone I know. Once I have the right name (it has to be the right name), I know who they are. That’s not very helpful, I know. That’s why basing them on a real person whose movie or video or personal visits I can go back to helps.
Request: Could you possibly do a fic where it’s like 15 years later and everyone has forgotten each other and it. And reader has a successful career as a actress/comedian and Richie who is a radio host is her biggest critic and maybe at one of her comedy shows she mentions smth about her childhood and like Richie remembers it and goes to talk to her. No romance just a platonic friendship that was forgotten but is now rekindled
Author’s note: It took me way too long to find a gif for this lol. Im so sorry this took forever! I had a lot of trouble getting this to be as good as I wanted and I kept scrapping what I wrote and restarting but I hope you enjoy this! (Also, Im sorry its on the shorter side!)
Today was the day, my latest interview would be released. It was probably one of the best interview I’ve done in awhile. This time they asked different questions, I always got the same few questions and it gets receptive after awhile but it was a nice change. The fans went nuts, especially when I shared my favorite childhood memory. I have to admit it, its a great story. In fact, it almost sounds like it came from a movie.
“Y/N, you have a call from Richie Tozier.” My assistant informed.
“Who?” I questioned.
“He’s that radio host that always has it out for you.” She answered.
“If he doesn’t like me then why is he calling?”
“He says it’s about that story you shared, the childhood memory one. It’s important apparently.”
“Alright.” I sighed.
She gave me the phone and left me to have privacy while I took this call. I wondered why he was calling, he’s been criticizing me for years, what makes some story from my childhood so important?
“Hello?” I answered, annoyed.
“Y/N?” He asked.
“This is Richie, from Derry.” He answered.
There was something strangely familiar about his voice. Richie? Why was that name so familiar?
“I saw your interview, about your favorite childhood memory.” He said. “Do you remember the time we stole those medical supplies for that kid?”
“Oh my god.” I muttered, realizing the obvious. “Trashmouth!” I grinned.
“God, I haven’t heard that in years.” He chuckled.
“We have to get lunch and catch up soon.”
“Richie! It’s so nice to see you!” I grinned, hugging him.
It was like time traveling, I mean he hadn’t changed much. Once a trashmouth, always a trashmouth. He still wore big glass, although they aren’t as thick as they used to be. He graduated from those awful hawaiian shirts to solid button ups. His curly hair was less unruly.
“It’s been too long Y/N.” Richie said sitting down across from me.
“I know.” I nodded. “But tell me, how is everything going?”
“It’s well, its going I guess.” Richie said sheepishly. “Not as well as well as its going for you.”
“Everything happens for a reason. It will all work out don’t stress out about it.”
“I’m glad we reunited again after all these years, and to think we were just miles apart.” He smiled. “We’ll have to get the rest of the losers together.”
22 Horror Movies for Snow Days *all available on Netflix right freakin' now!*
This photo from American Mary is just here for the thumbnail.
A promising surgical student drops out of school after a traumatic event and gets caught up in a black market for extreme body modification. Expect wit and gore but not jump scares. This is one of my personal favorites. Watch the trailer here.
2) The Taking of Deborah Logan
Do you like occult films but feel like you’ve seen everything the subgenre has to offer? Try The Taking of Deborah Logan. The film follows a group of students making a thesis documentary about Alzheimer’s. Naturally, things take a dark turn and we find that nothing is as it seems. This made my Best of 2014 list. Watch the trailer here.
3) The Damned
How do you destroy an entity that can’t be destroyed? Watch the trailer here.
If you’re more into laughs and camp, you might like Stitches. In this slasher horror-comedy, a crude, sloppy clown comes back from the dead to exact revenge on the people who killed him during a freak accident at a children’s party. Watch the trailer here.
5) Cabin in the Woods
A group of friends goes on vacation to a cabin in the woods… AGAIN. Same old slasher movie you’ve seen a million times before? Uh, not quite. Find out who’s behind the scenes making this trip a complete nightmare. Nothing is what it seems at this cabin… and nothing is a coincidence. Another one of my personal favorites- a movie specifically for horror fans who like to poke fun at horror archetypes. Watch the trailer here.
A masked killer stalks and kills the high schoolers of a small town. A group of friends realizes that in order to survive they must follow the rules of typical horror movies. It might sound generic, but it’s very self-aware and witty. If there is ever a chance for me to recommend Scream, I will. This is one of my favorites of all time (yeah, seriously!) Watch the trailer here.
A young woman seeks to exonerate her brother after he is released from a mental rehabilitation center, where he had been kept since childhood for allegedly murdering his father. What does she attempt to prove? That a mirror was responsible for the strange events and murders that took place in the homes of its owners, including their own. It’s really great but be warned the it has a non-linear narrative film structure, meaning scenes jump back and forth between present day and flashbacks. This made my Best of 2014 list. Watch the trailer here.
8) You’re Next
Another film that takes the slasher genre and turns it on its head. A well-to-do family comes together for a weekend to celebrate the mother’s and father’s anniversary. What’s supposed to be a fun celebration turns into a nightmare when the family realizes they are being hunted down. Find out why when you check out this unique, surprisingly funny, gory slasher. This made my Best of 2013 list with a tie for first place. Watch the trailer here.
9) The House of the Devil
A babysitter realizes her clients have a strange, dark secret. This is a slow-paced film with a 70s or 80s look. Not everyone will be into that, but it’s really good if you make it through the slow parts. Watch the trailer here.
A young woman contracts an STD… or so she thinks. Watch the trailer here.
11) The Innkeepers
During a hotel’s final days of being open, two employees seek to reveal its haunted past. Along the way, they experience some strange, creepy events. This film is made by Ti West, the same person who made The House of the Devil. It’s also slow-paced, but it’s good if you make it through the slow parts. This movie is pretty funny, so it makes the slow parts more bearable. Watch the trailer here.
12) All the Boys Love Mandy Lane
A group of high school friends invites the nerd-turned-hottie to a weekend getaway at a summer house. Of course, things go wrong and people end up dead but nothing is as it seems. Watch the trailer here.
13) Witching and Bitching
A group of thieves are trapped in a town full of witches by a coven. This film is hilarious, witty, and tons of fun. It’s in Spanish, but don’t let subtitles scare you away from great movies! This movie made my Best of 2014 list. Watch the trailer here.
Women seeking a more youthful look turn to a rather unsavory remedy to do the trick. This movie is foreign, so there will be subtitles. It will creep you out and it will gross you out. Watch the trailer here.
15) We Are What We Are
This slow-paced, gothic-style film follows a family preparing for a secret ritual. The last 5 minutes are worth the build-up. Watch the trailer here.
If you’re looking for a more cerebral type of movie, give Proxy a try. Essentially, the film follows three parents who have lost children. It’s gory, unique, and definitely keeps you guessing. You’ll think you have it all figured out, but you’ll probably be wrong. This made my Best of 2014 list. Watch the trailer here.
17) The Snowtown Murders
Based on a true story, a teenager falls in with his mother’s new boyfriend and his group of neighborhood watchmen who use murder and torture as a means of protecting their neighborhood. It’s pretty graphic and violent, so it won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, but Snowtown really is worth the watch. Watch the trailer here.
After The Village and The Happening, did you lose all faith in M. Night Shyamalan? Sit down and watch Devil, a murder mystery that takes place almost completely in a stuck elevator. It’s creepy and fast-paced. Watch the trailer here.
19) Alyce Kills
Alyce accidentally (“accidentally?”) kills her friend and subsequently delves into a world of sex, drugs, and murder. It’s cerebral, it’s badass. Watch the trailer here.
20) Kill List
A former hitman takes on a new job with a promise of a big payoff. It seems like a normal job at first, but things get darker and darker. It builds up suspense, so there aren’t really many jump scares. Watch the trailer here.
21) The Conspiracy
Friends making a documentary about conspiracy theories decide to infiltrate the ritualistic gathering of a secret society. Watch the trailer here.
22) The Haunting
This haunted house-themed remake is only on this list because it’s the first horror movie I ever saw in a theater and because I didn’t want to end the list at 21. I have a soft spot in my heart for it. Watch the trailer here.
Although Newsflesh (as Mira Grant) and Sparrow Hill Road were the first things of yours I read, the Toby books are my home and my heart, from Toby's negative-fuck-zone attitude to Tybalt's court to my heartbreaking love of The Luidaeg. This series is my favorite series of all time (topping my childhood love of Harry Potter) and I am SO.INCREDIBLY.HAPPY that it's been nominated for a Hugo! Thank you for this world and thank you for being you and I really hope it wins!!!
Thank you so much. I just…
I am still stunned, to be honest. Urban fantasy doesn’t tend to get much attention come award time, and while I don’t expect to bring home the inaugural Best Series rocket (Bujold is almost certainly going to do that), being nominated genuinely feels like a win.
Requested: Nope. Just a personal imagine I’ve been wanting to write :)
Warnings: None. You are safe, I have cookies.
NOTE: This goes out to the WOC and diversity-chickadees who love them some Peter Pan/ Robbie Kay! And thank you to all the people who reached out to my notice and gave me some very helpful information to make this whole thing possible, you guys are beautiful! Now, if some of this sounds ignorant, I apologize, I made it the best way I could, and hope you guys enjoy it no less! Sorry this took literally FOREVER, I’ve kinda been a little under the weather for a while :P
Being Light skin/Dark skin
Due to the lack of sunscreen, you wouldn’t spend that much time in the sun, using the explanation “I attract more sun than you, honey.”
Peter didn’t care about the pigment of your skin, there was a wide variety of lost boys that were tanned or caramel or even chocolate. Being the only colored girl though is what made the situation (in your opinion) much more challenging.
Him touching your natural hair, picking out twigs or leaves that made their way into it.
“It’s so soft…and fluffy. Like a…”
“If you say a dog, imma punch you in the face.”
From back home, you would teach Peter about hip-hop and R&B, showing him a few moves that he found kinda…interesting.
“The bloody hell is ‘The Whip’?”
“So I just raise my arm in the air, and sway side to side?”
Him sneezing into his arm, and you replying with “DAB!”
Peter looking at you with a raised eyebrow, completely confused
Him wanting an afro one day.
“Uh, yeah no. You would look ridiculous.”
“Why you got to hate on all dis, shawty?”
“…please don’t ever say that again.”
Him listening to Fetty Wap ONCE.
“Baby, won’t you come in my direction?”
“It’s freaking ‘Way’, Peter! He said ‘Way’!”
Him non-stop touching your large/small ass.
After constant tries to get him to stop, you start to like it.
“Y/n, I must say your lower half is quite amazing. It’s so squishy!”
Frightening the lost boys when you would turn full black woman.
“WHO THE HELL TOOK MY DAMN FOOD?!”
“WHY ARE YOU IN MY TENT?!”
“WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT GOING INTO THE WOODS BY YOURSELF? YOU GOT HURT, AND THAT’S WHAT YO ASS GET!”
Turning Peter on when you would be really loud, seeing the power you held against the lost boys.
Him always making you mad on purpose just to get a reaction out of you. That reaction turning into angry/rough sex.
“You just love pushing my buttons, don’t you?”
“It keeps me going, love.”
Having doubts about Peter dating you because of the color difference.
Him reminding you that he will love you constantly, no matter what you look like.
“You’re skin color means nothing, love. I don’t care if you’re a primary color. All that matters is your love for me, and mine for you.”
Him thinking that you would make some BEAUTIFUL mixed children. And you would.
“Love, they would have your skin and my eyes! And possibly your hair, and smile! Can’t you just imagine?”
You thinking that it was a cute idea to have kids with him someday, thinking about the little bugger or buggers having his beautiful green eyes, and your gorgeous hair.
Having children with him, and them being the wonderful mix you both were happy to have.
One of them having your deep(light) brown eyes, will the other having his forest green eyes, both having black(brown) and curly hair.
“Can you believe we made them? The mixture of colors is amazing! Look at their shade of brown, they’re absolutely stunning! We did a great job.”
You once coming out of the water, and your hair being more poofy, and Peter and his lost boys teasing you about it.
“Oh my God, she can store an army in that hair!”
“She looks like a black sheep!”
The teasing sometimes going too far to where you would stop talking to them altogether, or them having to catch these hands, or take they L and get to steppin.
“Say it to my muhf*cking face!”
“Call me a sheep one more time, I dare you, you little f*ck!”
“Bald-ass, having-ass, ashy-ass looking son of a donkey head-ass-!”
“YOU CAN KISS MY BLACK ASS!”
Peter having a field day with your sharp tongue, loving the snappy comebacks, and sass that radiated off you.
You not having any of Peter’s shit when he want to start a fight you know he’s gonna loose.
“Who the hell you think you talking to like that? You better rethink your life choices and put some respek on my name, and calm it!”
“You gon learn today, Mr.Tight-Pants, you got the wrong one.”
The lost boys loving when you two would fight, loving how animated and straight up petty you were.
“OH, so you got a problem? Well, I had a problem about three days ago, when you decided to lock me in those damn cages, just for dancing too ‘sexually’, like dafuq?? Excuse me, did I miss that meeting on who the f*ck you think you are? You not my mama, not my daddy-”
“Oh so now suddenly I’m not ‘daddy’? That’s not what you said last night, sweetheart.”
That goddamn smirk winning almost every argument, melting you from the inside, having your knees weak.
You loving the fact he doesn’t care about color, he cares about you. Taking care of you, protecting you, being his ride or die for life, because he ain’t ever gon get rid of you.
“You my one and only, you know that right?”
Him loving to have such a vivacious woman in his life, not making a single day of his life boring.
“And you are mine.”
Cooking your favorite dishes from childhood for Peter.
Him actually liking them, loving how its spiciness burns the inside of his mouth.
“What is this delightful tingle in my mouth?!”
“That would be the jalapeno peppers, mi amor.”
Him smirking at the nickname. ALL. THE. TIME.
Making the lost boys keep their tents tidy, hating messes with a passion.
“Make sure every dirt spot is clean!”
“There is dirt all around us, for Christ’s sake, Y/n!”
The lost boys being terrified of you whenever you were angry, but Peter absolutely adoring when you got mad.
Teaching Peter curse words in your language.
“Es una bruja cuando tiene hambre.”
“WHAT did you just call me???”
The lost boys never wanting to get anywhere near you when you’re mad, you throwing everything in sight, and cursing at anything around you in your language.
Not taking lip from either Peter or the lost boys, shutting down any attitude that’s given.
“EXCUSE me. Who do you think you’re talking to like that?”
Going out with the lost boys when they go hunting, getting the most caught.
“Well, my little warrior has brought home the most bacon. Muy bueno.”
“And my chief has been practicing his Spanish. Muy MUY bueno.”
Him getting chills every time you would speak in your language, begging you to keep speaking it, even during sex.
“Holy shit, say that again.”
Peter replacing the drums for the bonfire with maracas.
“Was this really necessary? The drums were fine…”
Not all that confident in yourself, thinking you weren’t good enough for Peter.
Him caressing your face, making you look into his eyes.
“Yo siempre te querré.”
You and Peter showing PDA ALL. THE. TIME.
Literally taking his breath away on how passionate the kiss turns, leaving him breathless and in a daze when you would pull away.
When Wendy came, you would be all over him, showing the flirty girl who Peter will ALWAYS come back to, no matter what.
“I’m gonna say this once and only once, understand? Don’t touch him, don’t look at him unless he asks you to, don’t you even so much as think about my man, comprende?”
Peter teasing you whenever you would get possessive or jealous over him.
“Whoa, down chica. No need to go all loca on our new guest. You know I love my enchilada more than my white bread.”
Letting Peter treat you like a flower, but also with respect and loyalty.
“Love, be careful, let me-”
“I can handle myself, niño perdido.”
During bonfires, you would show off your moves, impressing both the lost boys and Peter.
“There’s no bloody way you can move your waist like that! It’s like you don’t have a spine!”
“These hips don’t lie, baby.”
Peter being a jealous little shit when the lost boys would constantly want to know more about you and your culture, him not liking them stealing your attention.
“Why don’t you go back to flirting with your boyfriends?!”
“Okay, you’re gonna loose that attitude. I don’t want lost boys, I want a man. I am going to stay loyal to you because I love you. Don’t you ever forget that. You can’t get rid of me that easily.”
You being the one to break up fights between lost boys, shutting down the problem real quick.
Earning the lost boys respect, and them protecting you whenever Peter wasn’t around.
Basically being the mama bear, and if anyone hurt either one of your cubs was bound to be pounced on and mauled to death.
“Y/n, how do you say taco in spanish?”
“HOly shit, are you serious? Pshh your language is so child’s play.”
“Why won’t you come in the water with us, Y/n?”
“I can’t undress in front of you. It’s just…against how I was raised.”
You confusing Peter on why you would ALWAYS wear long sleeves, or anything for that matter that covered your skin from anyone.
“Love, don’t you get hot?”
“Stop calling me that. I’m fine, you all wear loads of clothing in this weather anyway. Don’t worry about me.”
Knowing very well that Peter was evil, but still held great respect for him and his decisions.
“I could care less whose heart you rip out. As long as you respect me, I will respect you.”
Him wanting to understand your headscarf, your clothing, EVERYTHING about you.
You explaining that you can’t show your most private parts or any parts of the body below your neck unless he is family or the same gender.
*Raises eyebrow* “Well at this point, you cover so much to where I am almost positive we are the same sex, love.”
Some of the lost boys teasing you about the clothes you wear, making fun of your headscarf.
You never wanting to fight with any of them…
Until one of them threw a rock at you…that’s when you beat the living shit out of anyone in close range.
Peter having to lock you in the cages for punishment, but being secretly surprised and proud to see you get violent.
“Well, well, well. Looks like little miss respect finally cracked. You really did a number on my lost boys-”
“They had it coming to them. Back in history to today, my people were never a violent race. We never fought when we are verbally assaulted, but if we are physically harmed we have every right to fight back.”
Him smirking, as he saw the dark look in your eyes. “Once I let you out, be prepared to have the most respect on this island, sweetheart.”
Most of the lost boys flirting with you, but you never flirted back.
Peter never seeing it that way, heightening his jealousy, making him angry at you.
“Why must you flirt with everything in sight? Do you like toying with my emotions?”
“I barely even have anything to offer them, I’m covered from head to toe. The fact that you think I’m asking for the attention, or ‘playing with your emotions’ sounds like a personal issue. An issue I don’t have the patience for. Now leave my tent, I have to change.”
“Anything you have is nothing I haven’t seen before, just change in front of me!”
“Exactly, you have seen before, but you won’t see mine. You wanna know what’s underneath these clothes, you’re gonna have to put a ring on this finger.”
Your relationship with Peter being very complicated, you and him never seeing eye to eye, always at each other’s throats.
Him loving how strong and independent you are, but it being very difficult for him to get close to you and see the woman underneath all of that clothing.
“Why won’t you just show me?”
“Why won’t you just drop it?”
“Do you not trust my judgement? Are you afraid I might not like what I see, is that it?”
“Why does it always have to be about you? Maybe I just want to have something for myself until I find the right person who loves me for me and not my body! I wear this not only for my religion, but for MY judgment. To see who really loves a woman for who she is, and not for her body! Why do you care so much what’s underneath these clothes? Would it make a difference on how you feel about me, what-?!”
Him kissing you strongly to shut you up, you being surprised but slowly kissing him back.
Once he pulled away, he would stare deeply into your eyes, taking in every detail of your face. Not like he hasn’t memorized it already.
“I’ve already fallen in love with this face, and your fiery personality. I just…I want to see more…I need to see more. My imagination can only go for so long until I snap, love. I will even be satisfied with seeing you without this bloody headscarf.”
With him confessing his love for you,you being relieved that you could finally share the same feelings with him. Nodding your head that he could take your scarf off.
“Peter…if you do want to be with me…you’ll have to ask for my parents permission…”
Him being shocked, and confused. “Y-You’re parents don’t even know that I exist, let alone will they let you be with a demon.”
“Well then..at least the permission of someone I’m closest to.”
“And who might that be?”
“…You, dummy. But,” you put the headscarf back on. “I cannot be rogue of my clothing, until we are married.”
“Oh, come on, can’t you break religion and be free? This is Neverland, you can do whatever you want.”
“And I want to stick with my beliefs, and wait until marriage. If you care about me, you would wait for me.”
Him weighing his options, then sighing.
“I want to hear you say it. Say that you love me…”
“…I love you, Peter Pan.”
Him agreeing with your beliefs, then vanishing without another word. Leaving you to stand by yourself, and go over what just happened. You guess you had a boyfriend now.
Both of your eyebrow game being ON POINT
You celebrating two holidays with the lost boys:
Eid al-Fitr and
“What even are these holidays?” Was the most question asked by the lost boys.
Eid al-Fitr is a small celebration between friends and family. You guys. And
Eid al-Adha is a HUGE celebration which is celebrated at the end of Ramadan. Ramadan we will start first, which is where we get up real early, eat, and then go the rest of the day until sundown with no food, or water.”
“Love, we live in the woods. That’s basically how we live most of the time.”
You mostly spending time doing your daily five prayers.
“Y/n, must you do this everyday?”
“Instead of criticizing, join me for once.”
"A demon praying? Yeah, that’s a great idea.”
You coming out on top, being the fierce queen Peter had always wanted, if anyone were to give you lip, he would be there to put them in their place for you.
“Respect your mother. You have a problem, then why waste your heart on that kind of nonsense? I will gladly take care of it for you.”
“‘Respect your mother. Heaven is under her feet’. That’s a direct quote from our prophet. In other words, what he said.”
Later on in the couple of years you’ve been on the island, Peter finally swallowed his pride and asked you to marry him. To be his queen forever.
And after you were married, as promised, Peter’s imagination could finally come to an end.
“That was not even CLOSE to what I was expecting you to look like underneath all those clothes, love.”
You slowly becoming insecure, glaring daggers at him as you raise up from his bed.
“Sorry to disappoint you…” you go to get out of his bed, but he stops you, pulling you down to where you were practically laying on top of him.
“Disappoint me? Y/n you made the wait so much more worth it by making me work for it. Nothing is more sweeter until you’ve actually waited and made an effort to make it happen. I am honored to be the only man to ever see you this way.”
You being surprised with his response, but smiling at him lovingly, him returning the smile.
“Well good. Because you’re going to be seeing it a lot more often.”
“Oh, sweetheart…I am counting on it.”
Being Indian/Native American
You feeling like the elder of the group, if Peter or Felix wasn’t around, and treating the lost boys like your own children.
“Now, look up, and you see that star? That’s the North Star. Whenever you are lost, you won’t need a compass. Just follow that star to find your way home.”
“Love, that’s completely nonsense. We have compasses, we don’t need silly stars.”
Showing the lost boys that ‘silly stars’ are just as useful as compasses, when you take them on spirit walks, journeying far into the woods, then safely making your way back without any trouble.
Peter not believing it, but is impressed that you didn’t lose anybody, and still made it back safely.
“Luck seems to be on your side, love.”
“The only luck I need are the trees and the stars.”
Being able to outsmart Peter, actually knowing the island better than he ever could, and that ending up with him being furious.
Him locking you up in the cages until you know your place, but keeping your composure the entire time, not giving in to his childish game.
“Y/n, it’s been three days since you’ve eaten or drank anything! Just stop being so stubborn, so I can let you out! I don’t like seeing my lost girl like this.”
“The island is more angry with you, than I am.”
“ARH! Stop with ‘the island is saying this’ and ‘the island says that’!”
Him being confused with the little accessories you wear some times (or all the time)
“What is this red dot on your forehead.” *licks his thumb, about to wipe it off*
“No! It is my bindi, you cannot wipe it off!”
You blushing a little, forgetting that you forgot to acknowledge him about him or ask his permission.
“It…it signifies that I am..married..”
“MARRIED? To who?! When were you ever going to tell me? What’s the bloody bastard’s name? I swear I will rip his heart out and he will watch me crush it, right after I-”
You start laughing at his rant, confusing him even more and making him angrier.
“Oh you think this is funny, do you?”
“YOU’RE funny. I am married to you, Peter.”
His eyes widening, then he chuckles himself, slowly hugging you to his side
“I don’t recall me ever asking you to, love.”
“You have to? I thought anything on this island belonged to Peter Pan. So if that was the case, why not marry myself to you and make it official?”
You bringing the music, and exotic food to the camp, making all the lost boys either cheer with joy, or groan from eating too much and facing the consequences.
“Come on, you guys, it’s not that spicy.”
“WHAT DID YOU PUT IN THIS? STRAIGHT HELL FIRE?!”
“I for one thinks this is quite delicious, my love.” *kiss to your forehead*
“Leave it to the demon to not think it’s too hot.”
Teaching them the art of Bollywood.
Being able to keep up with Peter, matching him in his wit and mind games, actually beating him a couple of times.
“Peter Pan never fails-”
“Except against me, of course!”
Him rolling his eyes every time you would add that in.
Being confident in yourself, but whenever Wendy was around and kept staring at you, you would start to feel uncomfortably small.
“What is that red mark on your forehead?” *she goes to touch it*
*You smacking her hand away* It’s none of your business, the only thing you need to know about it is that it notifies that Peter belongs to me.”
“I don’t see the same on his forehead.”
“BUT YOU’RE ABOUT TO SEE POCAHONTAS IN A MINUTE!”
Peter making sure that you felt loved 24/7, that no matter what, you would always be his #1 Bollywood dancer, or his Eternal Blossom.
“What is a king without his queen?”
“A sad, lonely man with a failed kingdom?”
Him looking at you with a raised eyebrow, but the shaking his head.
Both of your eyebrow game being STRONG.
“Mine are better, love.”
“You wish, I was born with perfect eyebrows. Yours took time to look like perfection, instead of caterpillars on your face.”
Peter introducing you to Tiger Lily, both of you hitting it off the minute you realized you were the same.
“My sister, I knew that some day Pan would trade that forsaken Wendy for a real woman. Welcome home.”
Spending a lot of time with Peter and the lost boys.
Literally making it your everyday mission to be around them, no matter the situation.
“Good morning, Peter, do you need me for anything?”
“Hey, Slightly, let me help you with that!”
“Aw, you got a cut on your knee? Allow me to use this ancient secret, my mother once taught me.” *pulls out a bandaid*
You sharing new holidays with the boys, having lots of food, and decorations aimed for your traditions, and FOOD.
“Happy Chinese New Year!”
“It’s March Equinox!”
“Love, how many of these holidays are we celebrating???”
Sharing lots of foods from your home.
“So all this is basically raw fish, animals, and noodles?”
“Yeah, great way to dumb it down…”
You kinda wanting to go home, due to your strong love and loyalty to your family, and feeling ashamed that you just disappeared without a goodbye.
“Peter…I’d like to go home and see my family…please.”
Him with eyebrows raised high to the sky, confused beyond belief.
“You can’t leave. This is your home, we are your family now.”
You not going with that response, and keep on trying to persuade him, only making him angrier.
That anger leading into a huge argument, which leads to rage (or tears) and storming away from him without another word.
Peter feeling awful that he yelled at you and you were just worried about your family. He went looking for you, and found you sleeping by a tree, traces of tears upon your pale(or non-pale) face.
Making up later on after he took you back to his tent, him not being able to stay mad at your adorable face (visa versa)
“You’re just too…what’s that word you used earlier?”
“No the other one, the cuter sounding one. The one where it sounds like you sneezed.”
“Yeah that one! You’re just too baka.”
Being like a mother to the lost boys, them being your many many children you love looking after.
Whenever Peter wasn’t around, they would go to you, unless they came to Felix first.
Felix, even though he was much older than you, saw you as a big sister or a role model, on the account of how loving you are one second, and then inhumanly strict on the next.
“Jacob! Feet off the table!” *smacks with a stick*
5 seconds after he put his feet down…
“Kamsa-hamnida, dasom!” *cute smile*
Peter loving how motherly you are, almost making him wonder how you would mother your own son or daughter
Knowing he wants to have a child with you, but the idea not really sitting with you in the right way.
“I just don’t think we’re ready, Peter. A baby is a big responsibly, and you’re just not in the right position for one. Neither am I.”
“Y/n, what do you mean? Of course I’m in the right position, what does that even mean? Do you just not want to have a baby with me? Is that it?”
Instead of that thought making him mad, it actually makes him really upset.
You immediately rushing over to him, hugging him tightly.
“Peter no, of course not. I do want to have a child with you, some day, but…for right now, I like taking care of boys who won’t ever grow up. And picture that being a new born. You wanna stay changing diapers forever?”
Even though Peter is the leader, you make him participate in the chores the lost boys have to do.
“Peter, you can help wash the laundry, since you’re not doing anything.”
Him scoffing “This is my island, I don’t have to-”
“DISHONOR! DISHONOR ON YOUR WHOLE FAMILY!”
“DISHONOR ON YOU!”
“DISHONOR ON YOUR COW!”
“ALRIGHT! I’ll do the stupid laundry..”
You actually being the dominant one, and him having a love/hate feeling on that.
“I’m gonna make a man out of you, Peter Pan.”
“I’m going to take you to a whole new world!”
“ENOUGH with the puns, or I swear to God-”
“CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE TONIGHT?!”
“Anime? Manga-what are these words you are saying to me? Why is this book backwards?? Why the bloody hell is their… EVERYTHING so big!”
“Look at the bloody boobs on these girls! What kind of book is this???”
You and him having weird conversations, involving where you come from, and what your life was like, and sometimes it leads to your flaws.
“Who is this ‘Godzilla’?”
“What is this ‘Karate Kid’? Is it a type of snack?”
“Why are your boobs so tiny? You are just a load of tiny aren’t you? You know Wendy-”
“I’M gonna stop you right there, you jackass! Sorry my breasts aren’t at the size of your liking, maybe you should start looking at my eyes once in a while! But I’ll be damned if you start comparing me to that blonde, bubbled-headed,
Peter taking every ounce of your foreign curse words, with an amused smirk, actually writing some of them down.
Him having to kiss you deeply to stop your ranting, leaving you a blushing mess.
“…You gotta warn me when you’re going to do that…”
“Aw, but where’s the fun in that? You’re bloody adorable when you’re embarrassed.”
No matter how much you and Peter annoy each other 24/7, you two can’t deny that you love each other unconditionally.
Teasing and trolling Peter when you would speak in your other language, because he’d have no idea what you were saying.
“我那麼愛你，彼得Wǒ nàme ài nǐ, bǐdé.”
“What did you say?”
“私はあなたのように、多くのピーターを愛しWatashi wa anata no yō ni, ōku no pītā o aishi.”
Finally a few of the lost boys who you’ve taught, or knew how to speak your language finally informs him on what you’ve been saying to him.
“She says she loves you.”
“THAT’S IT? She’s been doing this for weeks, and THAT’S all she’s been saying??”
AD Podcasts, Christopher Moore, and Turn-of-the-Century Impressionism
So this week I’m re-reading one of my all-time favorite books. It’s called Sacré Bleu: A Comedy d’Art, by Christopher Moore.
Moore is a writer of comedic speculative fiction, combining fantastical elements from a variety of cultural sources with the sometimes over-ordinary events of daily life. He’s one of my all-time favorite writers; particular gems include Sacré Bleu; Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal; Fluke (or, I Know Why The Winged Whale Sings); Fool; and A Dirty Job (and its recent sequel Secondhand Souls). I’m not sure if Moore has a Tumblr presence, but he’s on Twitter @TheAuthorGuy.
Sacré Bleu is a story that mostly centers on Lucien, a (fictional) baker in the Parisian district of Montmartre, where congregated the great artists of the Impressionist era during the late 1800s. Lucien was taught by Renoir, coddled by Pissarro, sneered at by Degas, condescended to by Monet, and mourned the death of Vincent Van Gogh right alongside Dr. Gachet and Henri Toulouse-Lautrec.
It’s also about a timeless muse whose skin exudes magical memory-altering blue pigment harvested by a Neanderthal. But that’s not really why I’m writing.
What’s struck me on this second read is how plausible it is to me that all of these great artists knew each other, drank together, suffered together, and orbited each other throughout their lives. Because of course they did! They were all living in France, their paintings hung in the same galleries, and they drank in the same bars! But more importantly, they were the only other people crazy enough to believe with all their beings that their art would sustain them. (ok yes, some of them came from money, so they needn’t have worried–– just stick with me here, the point is coming.)
Back in the spring, I was invited to a group forming online which now includes most of the people who make your favorite fiction podcasts: Wolf 359. Wooden Overcoats. Archive 81. Kakos Industries. The Cleansed. We’re Alive. Our Fair City. Small Town Horror. The NoSleep Podcast. The Truth. The Black Tapes & Tanis. Within the Wires. ars Paradoxica and the Bright Sessions, of course. And that’s just some of the more well-known examples. I could go on for a huge wall of text listing all the shows who contribute. (To all of my podfriends I did not list, I love you all as well, and please feel free to tag yourselves!)
Not only do we discuss the ins and outs of writing, production, recording, gear, publishing, marketing, and social media – did you think #AudioDramaSunday happened by accident? – but we also have an incredibly lively Random/Off-Topic section where we talk about video games, food, TV shows, events, school, work, illness, life stresses, and general shenanigans. We’ve become a huge group of friends. I’ve honestly never seen a more supportive, welcoming, and friendly group of people, especially one so large and whose member list is constantly expanding. I feel so, so lucky and grateful to be included in this wonderful weird audio drama podcast family.
We support each other because we are the only other people crazy enough to believe, with all of our beings, that our art will sustain us.
Some time ago I was thinking about what a pokemon region would be like if it drew heavily from my home, and I thought, instantly, of my grandfather, recently deceased, as a water-type gym leader.
I learned to swim, as a baby, in the Au Sable river in Oscoda county. He had a cabin right on the banks of the river, and it was a long running tradition for the entire family to drive north for one weekend every summer, assemble all manner of inner tubes and rafts, and float a sometimes-leisurely, sometimes hilariously eventful two-hour long trip down the chilly but beautiful river, get out at his cabin, and have a huge barbecue in the front yard. Its such a huge, integral part of my childhood, that when i think of my grandpa, I will always remember him in faded swim trunks and soggy sneakers.
the pokemon is a snickerel, based on the northern pike, a favorite fish of my family. They’re bony eating, but still a good dinner. (the northern pike is not strictly the same as a pickerel, but theyre of the same family and uuuuuh im bad at puns)
I’ve called him Oscar, which was not my grandpa’s name, but the name he called a large rock in the river slightly upstream from the cabin that he used to tie rafts to.
chill and icy rain were out of season for May in New York. As I stepped outside
from the Broadhurst Theatre, the blustery weather took my breath away. The
chill had me rubbing my hands over the thin cardigan which covered my arms.
Despite the cold, a small crowd had begun to form at the stage door. Each and
every night the sidewalk outside the theatre was overtaken by fans of the
Company, and rightfully so. The new hit musical Anastasia had won over the hearts of America’s youth as they fondly
remembered a favorite childhood movie.
performance was spectacular. Though some bits of the musical were different
from the last performance I had seen on opening night, I still found myself
slipping away from New York and its crowded streets to 1920s St. Petersburg,
Russia. The last struggling patrons emerged from inside and several young
teenage girls squeezed as close to the stage door barrier as they could. I knew
just how blown away and thankful the Company was to have such incredible
support and feedback, especially for a brand-new musical. Shivering, I moved
past the excited patrons to the stage door manager.
hello roby ✌🏻, i was wondering if pokémon were real, i know WOW 😳😱, but if they were actually here, what pokes would u have on your real life team!? 🖤
oh gosh i don’t know, i have so many favorites so i’ll just list some that would be cool to have: charizard (I’m fucking basic but i love dragons), arcanine (good big boy), gengar (we’d be matching if i wore my horn hoodie…), typhlosion (long boy), togetic, mightyena (childhood fave), lugia (SINCE ITS FROM MY FAVORITE GAME), torchic (warm friend), absol (got that emo look), froslass, luxray, garchomp (again, i love dragons), lucario, zorua (also again, I’m basic), and deino