but it sure pays off at the end

punkrocknerdfighter  asked:

rickon's story is a shaggydog story? can you explain more how his story fits into that framework?

A shaggy dog story, for the unfamiliar, is a kind of joke wherein the (deeply meta) humor derives from the lack of punchline. They’re typically meandering and long-winded, creating suspense not with the content of the story itself but the sense of a Chekov’s gun waiting to fire: this has to pay off! The joke is that it doesn’t. The story just ends, usually with an anticlimax or non sequitur, and the laughter comes from the realization of how long the storyteller had you on the hook. 

And that sure sounds like Rickon and Shaggydog to me! IMO it’s some of the least subtle foreshadowing in the series, if you go in knowing what a shaggy dog story is. 

A little Klance date

I was looking for some casual clothes to put the paladins in and accidentally found myself in the sweater section of an online store and I may have taken about 15 screenshots of references, so I guess you could say this is the start of a series or something??

Lovelies

I am off to meditation, the recent events with the anonymous harassment has me at the end of my patience. I’m sure you can understand.

I want you all to know how undeserving you are of such treatment. The words sprayed at you by unknown mouths are only meant to try and make you doubt yourself. They attack who you are because they do not know how to accept themselves. Pay no mind to them, block them, report them, and move on. Never try to feed their flame.

Until I return

Sleep With Nightmares of Me

~Darkiplier

Savior - Kol X OC

Hi, hello, bonjour :)

Summary: Kol is bored and is looking for a meal, but it doesn’t turn out the way he thought it would.

Author’s Note: So, this isn’t fun. I don’t know why I wrote this, it’s kinda pointless lol, I was just bored in class this afternoon and this happened. I’ve never wrote something like this before but I’m still posting it, maybe you’ll like it.

Words: 1202

Warnings: Blood and violence.

Please, note that I am French so there might be some mistakes here and there.

Originally posted by showandwrite

It was a hot and noisy night in New-Orleans and Kol Mikaelson couldn’t have been more annoyed. His siblings were off doing God knows what with God knows who, though he was pretty sure Elijah was with his niece and her mother. He wandered in the street of his brother’s city without paying much attention to where he was going and ended up in what could only be the least crowded bar of the city.

Keep reading

My childhood was constant misery and repression so I never relate to these posts where its like “my life has sucked since childhood ended :(” like fuck off sure I have to stress over paying bills but like, I grew up poor so I remember that stress back then too but as a child there was nothing I could do about it. Being in control of your own life is scary but you know what’s worse? Having your abusive parents control it. Like, I know I am hardly alone with these experiences, I’m not acting like I’m superior to others here just venting bc christ, where was this happy and safe childhood y'all had and why was I not invited??

uh oh!

Guess what?! I got my computer back!

I ended up moving to a different room. I think I got sick again in my original room was because I didn’t clean the dust thoroughly and the mold was still there. After moving to a new room my dad helped cleaned the old room. So the room is in livable condition now! We plan to rent it out because we need the extra money to pay off for all the fixing. Either way I am so happy to be back.

I am not completely done moving yet but at least I will slowly but surely resume on all the overdue commissions! They have been sitting on the sidelines for waaaaayyyyy too long!

Also I finally recover completely after being sick for so long! Thank you california sun for coming back~


Lucid

Happy request,

I have to request in 2 asks lol Happy imagine where your a bigger girl not so confident but you had been seeing happy in secret chibs is the only one  who knows you arent sure he wants people to know chibs encourages you to surprise him at the club, you show up surprise him he plays it off like your just a friend blows you off. Chibs lectures him and he begs your forgiveness you end up together

Beautiful

I was looking at my reflection on the mirror, Happy was taking a shower on the room next to me. I touched with the tips of my fingers my tummy and my thighs, paying attention to every detail, every insecurity. I felt disgust turning my stomach but I could see the love marks Happy left through my skin starting to turn purple and I asked myself why, why would he chose me not once or twice but several nights a week for how long? Six months. Things were taking a serious turn in my heart, it was not a last night stand since about two months ago when he started staying the night, then taking a shower in the morning and now even a cup of coffee while both of us talked about our days, our favorite movies and expectations.

I heard the water close and I ran to get a shirt to cover my body with, when the door was opening I was already sliding on some sweats, god forbid he seeing my legs in the light of the day, he came out only wearing a towel covering his lower region and I blushed a little at the view.

“Mornin’” he said in a hushed voice and I looked at him with a smile “Sleep well?”

“Yeah, Hap” I said before getting up, I opened one of the drawers and took a clean shirt for him. He raised his eyebrows at me “You let me borrow your shirts sometimes, I wash them and keep them in the drawer” I said and he smiled at me before embracing me for a short second “I’ll make some coffee, alright?”

I met Happy through Chibs, we became good friends a while ago one time when my old car broke down and from that moment we became pretty close, he was my confident and helped me work on my self-esteem and self-worth even when times were looking blue more than anything, he took me to one of the club’s parties one night and that was the moment all began. Sitting on a sofa next to two crow eaters sat the man I would fell in love with no more than three months later, he had that bad to the bone aura that attracted me since the minute we looked at each other in the eye. Chibs introduced me to Happy on the couch that night and Jax and Tig who were standing next to the bar, immediately the dark haired one started flirting and making me laugh the whole night but it only developed into a silly friendship unlike the look in Happy’s face through the whole time. Not even a week later I was in bed next to Happy.

“Hey Lass” said the Scottish man on the other line of the phone “Happy invited you to the party tonight?” he said and I just sighed

“He didn’t. This whole thing is a secret.” I said on the phone, 10 minutes ago Happy had left in his roaring motorcycle he parked on the back of my place “I don’t know if I can keep playing this game anymore”

“Lass…you should come”

“Why? He’s definitely embarrassed of the fatass he’s fucking with. If I was like one of the CaraCara girls I might would be able to come” I said while tears ran down my cheeks

“Lass, don’t think that way” he said sighing “You’re fucking beautiful, girl and you should never forget that. Go put on some nice clothes and come tonight, 7:30 make sure he knows what he’s missing out”

I put on my best jeans, a nice shirt and a leather jacket on top. My high heels clicked against the pavement in from of the TM, the music roaring in my ears, the smell of alcohol heavy in the air and lots lots of people and motorcycles. I approached the entrance unsure if it was a good decision but before I could leave back to my car, Filip was dragging me inside, putting a drink on my hand and putting his hand around my waist. I saw Happy seating on the same couch I met him the first time, Bobby next to him while some crow eater danced on the latest lap. Happy had a blonde chick hanging around him but he flipped her off at least two times since the first time I saw him, Chibs dragged me there Bobby putting a hand up as a hello and Happy immediately meeting my gaze.

“Look, who’s here brother” said Chibs pushing me forward, the blonde chick looking at me up and down but Happy didn’t say a thing. I just stood there quietly looking at Chibs and he put his arm around my shoulders while we drank, a few Nomads approached us no long after.

“Hey, I’m Marcus” said one and I introduced myself “So YN what brings you here?” he said and Chibs nudged Happy.

“A friend of the club” said the Tacoma Killer looking at Marcus making the last one nod. I felt my heart breaking at that moment but I just looked down putting the sour beer against my lips, I waited a considerable time before heading outside without it seeming obvious.

I heard someone come outside no long after “Chibs, I’m not in the mood” I said

“I’m not Chibs” Marcus was standing there next to me, he motioned us to sit on one of the picnic tables and I followed him.

Happy POV

“Man that was a total asshole move” said Chibs in a whisper next to me, I looked at him with a serious look and he just called me out to move. When we got outside there she was talking to Marcus, the beautiful smile in her face for him. “You’re missing out in someone so beautiful and kind brother” said Chibs but I couldn’t take my eyes of the sight in front of me, she looking at him, paying complete attention to what he said. “You’re gonna lose her” he said and in that moment something clicked on me with a few long steps I was next to them, Marcus looked up to me expecting a reason for my outburst, she had a clueless look in her face.

“Something you need brother?” said Marcus but I couldn’t keep my eyes off YN

“Your hands off my old lady” I said and Marcus looked at me with wide eyes before stepping up and leaving us alone.

“I’m not your old lady” she said with a cold tone and I felt a lump inside my throat. “You are embarrassed of me, how can I be your old lady?”

“No baby, I’m….I’m an idiot baby girl” I said trying to approach her but she took her hand away from me.

“I’m going home, Happy” she said, No No No I couldn’t loser her not this way, never.

“I love you” I said and I saw her breath heavily “I love you so much, I was scared. I didn’t want this club, the shit surrounding it to destroy what we have” I said taking her hand in between mine and kissing it softly “I adore you, you are the most beautiful girl in the world. I want to make sure you never forget that” I said before putting her even closer to me and kissing her softly “I love you, I love you. I’m sorry I ever made you feel like you were not enough, YN. You are even more than what a man like me deserves, love.” I said

“I love you too Happy” she said hugging me, I felt her tears wetting my shirt but I just held her closer to me.  

“Will you be my old lady?” I said and she nodded slowly

“No more hiding?” she said and I kissed her deeply

“No more hiding”

This request touched my heart because I’m a heavier girl myself and I have dealt with self-esteem problems since I was a little girl, I hope someday someone loves me for who I am and I know all of you beauties are going to find someone who loves you and adores every single inch of yourselves, never take any less from anyone because you deserve only the best.

Buffyversary

Well. Holy crap. 20 years of Buffy. 20. YEARS.

Let me talk to you about what Buffy means to me.

I’m a “first wave” millennial. I was born in 1985. My formative years were spent on the internet before that was a normal thing to do. It was the great unknown.

I didn’t get into Buffy at the start. When it started airing on BBC2, I didn’t pay much attention. I watched one episode (I think The Witch) after some urging by a friend. I’d always been into the supernatural. I played VTM (predominantly online, in Yahoo chat - “The Vampyres Tavern”, under the “Romance” chat rooms). I read predominantly fantasy. I think it was mostly my friends that ended up influencing me to start watching just as season 2 kicked off.

By the end of that season, I was hooked.

I’m not sure what it was the spoke to me. The fighting? Yes, i love people kicking ass. The language? Buffyisms stay with me until this day. The characters?  None of them were what you’d expect. They played against stereotype. It was awesome.

I remember being aggressively pissed off that my boyfriend at the time booked this wonderful valentines date… because it was the day Once More With Feeling first aired. Luckily for him, he also recorded it for me.

I was a totally Bangel shipper, but i never heard the term “bangel” until about 5 years after the show ended. It was just “Buffy/Angel”. It was a miraculous love.

I had a bit of a ritual. Friday nights. All lights in the living room off. Me, a bottle of pepsi, and a box of jaffa cakes. I demanded silence. I got SO MAD when my parents or brothers interrupted. That was MY TIME. Dork.

I will never forget when I realised spoilers were bad for me. I devoured Buffy spoilers, but for some reason didn’t do the same for Angel. Then “The Trial” aired. At the end of that episode, Drusilla makes a shock return, siring Darla. I was jumping up and down. I was PSYCHED. And then I realised that if i’d know that was coming, i’d have not experienced the same feeling. I swore off spoilers from that day, and never returned.

Buffy was also my first Internet Fandom. I’d been around nerdy spaces on the net for years by this point - at 14 i was a chat room/forum vet, already moderating a bunch - but all about role playing. I tried to get into The Bronze forum a few times. I never really felt welcome. It seemed mostly americans, so spoileriffic. Somehow i found this Buffy fansite, “Anywhere But Here”, and on that board i found my people. It was a good mix of people from the UK and America. It was pretty queer centric, being run by a straight woman and a gay man, and i found my confidence to talk openly with those people about being bisexual before i was ready to talk to my real life peers. I had 3 amazing friends, all females from the UK, and we formed “The Wiccan Watchers”. Yeah, we were a bit of a clique, but i dont think in a nasty way. We just liked having our own special thing. We wrote fanfic together. I met my first “internet strangers” in a trip to Devon, where all of us teenage girls finally got to meet.

My mum had to phone the other girls mum before she let me go. So embarrassing.

I’ll always remember drinking tequila with nectarines instead of lemon, because thats what we had, and it was yummy.

I’ll also always remember beeing deeply suspicious that the BTVS writers were lurking on ABH. Particularly after things we wrote started appearing in the show. I screamed at my TV when Giles and Willow discussed the wiccan coven in Devon.

We had awards ceremonies for board members. I hosted. I wrote a song for one. It was based on the Sarah Michelle Gellar/ Jack Black 2002 MTV movie awards intro.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Okcp0AVsPD0

We were the coolest.

We all went off to university, me last of all, in 2003 (i was the baby). We grew away from ABH. A few people moved on to become Browncoats, myself included. I got care packages from my Buffy friends. I sent care packages to my Buffy friends. They were more than “internet friends”.

Buffy was still airing. Angel was still airing. But not for long.

Being a cusp millennial - let me tell you about my internet. At home, i had broadband. In my halls of residence, i had dial up. That you had to pay for, on TOP of the charge you had to pay to use your phone line to begin with - oh yes, i paid for my landline phone like with a pre-paid card. Now, i cant even imagine it. Luckily, being a nerd and having nerdy roommates, i found a dealer. A guy from the computer studies class who would download eps of Buffy and Angel on the lab broadband and burn them off for me. Excellent. I still had my backup though… Box sets. 6 seasons of BTVS on VHS. 4 season of Angel. That was about… 57 VHS tapes. They were my security blanket. They went with me wherever i went. Absolute NIGHTMARE for my parents who had to ferry me up and down the country during breaks.

Thank god for DVD’s. Then Digital Downloads. SO MUCH EASIER.

My Buffy friends also set my dating criteria. I’d had a couple of bad ones. They told me i wasn’t allowed to date anyone until they met specific criteria, including loving StrongBad from Homestar Runner, and of course, Buffy.

That night i had a “one night stand” with the hot goth nerd i’d been sporadically flirting with. We joked around about strongbad. The next day we spent the whole day in bed watching Buffy, until i kicked him out without even a phone number to go on.

13 years later, we have a mortgage. He’s still a hot nerd. We still make each other cry laughing, and still lie around watching cult TV. Funny how life works out.

My Buffy Friends have done well by me.

While my life drew me away from internet fandom, Buffy was ever a presence in my life. Once i was on MTV as a selected group of Whedon nerds. The producer tried to give us “kooky” facts like “I’ve watched Buffy 5 times!”. 5 times? Laughable. 50 maybe. We all sort of cut in and gave true facts - mine being that i was writing my dissertation on intertextuality in the works of Joss Whedon. She gave us the startled blink that only non nerdy people can when faced with SHEER GEEK and was like “… oh, Okay. Wow they are better than what we came up with.”

That is the one time i met Joss. I got a hug. I’m terrible at meeting people i admire. Its just an impossibly huge task to be faced with someone who changed your life but doesn’t even know you. I always say something fucking stupid. This time, i just got a hug. It was good.

I try not to regret anything, but there is one thing in my life i do regret. At the Serenity premiere in London, i had a ticket for the after party. My partner was with me. We had to catch a train. I couldn’t justify abandoning him and going. Luckily… one of my Buffy Friends was there. One of my original ABHers. I gave him my ticket.

He danced with Joss. I am full of raging jealousy. I’m also full of joy that if i couldn’t go, another life long Buffy friend could.

I haven’t even mentioned Anya yet. Oh, how i love Anya. Anya was the first TV character i ever encountered that i felt was speaking my language. I mean, she’s an ex vengeance demon, so i’m not sure what it says about me…

But… seriously. Video below. My everlasting spirit animal.

It gives me ridiculous nerdy joy that my nieces both have an accidental Anya link… 1) Born on the 4th July, 2) Called… Anya.

I like to think that Buffy made me who i am today. And who i am is a kick ass woman.

We can all live by the wisdom of the Buffyverse, and it will make the world a better place.

“Bottom line is, even if you see ‘em coming, you’re not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can’t help that. It’s what you do afterwards that counts. That’s when you find out who you are.” - Whistler in “Becoming (Part 1)” - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

i just can’t

after the last two months of my gym “buddy” being unable to decide what she wants to do, I’ve made a decision. I’m not sure how I’m going to end it yet, but I’m taking my offer off the table. 

See- when I joined the gym I went for the higher priced plan so that she could come with me (they allow you 1 free guest each day if you pay more). I did this so that she could go with me (I didn’t tell her that, so that she wouldn’t feel bad). I told her that whenever she wanted to go, I was game. I thought I needed a gym buddy to get shit done, but honestly I think she’s holding us both back. Everyday is exhausting. It’s gotten so bad and a huge red flag just popped up. 

She’s racist. And she doesn’t try to keep it a secret. She says such mean things. About everyone. From throwing a lot of hate at people in better shape, to being loud and clearly racist. She says she’s proud to be a racist. WTF. This person has been my “best friend” for at least a couple years. How did I not see this before? Was I so lonely that I just looked past it? 

Being alone can’t be worse than that. 

3

people are still talking to me about my throam tickets, so here they are! i’ve updated them a little bit, and changed the dates (:

the follower’s date is obviously the first show of the jackie tour, where he and brendon met. the diamonds and pearls date is the one at the end of vol 2, where brendon and shane are kicked off the tour. 

if you pay extra special attention you’ll notice some little codes in the numbers of the ticket.

and if you print these babies out and put em on your wall or in your notebooks make sure to tag me in a picture of them! i’m proud of these guys, and i wanna see what you guys do with them (: enjoy!

Life is expensive so I’ve been thinking about opening full body commissions to help pay for my bad coffee habits/ stuff and things. I’ve never really opened commissions before so I guess i’m not sure if my style is something people would want or not so- i’m trying to practice my lineart skills! 

So here is some lineart practice of .. well it started off as Lucy and ended up as Wendy so i’m not really sure…  BUT feel free to color if either way if you have some time! 

I hope you guys had a good Monday!  

I am having a truly awful design experience right now.

I’m designing sound and my friend is designing lighting for a very small off-off-Broadway production. We knew from the beginning that it would not pay very well, but we both are recent grads and are looking for any and all NYC design credits.

The first sign of trouble came with a lack of organization. After a month of asking for a schedule and knowing only that opening was the end of January, I took a board op position for December and the first two and a half weeks of January just so I could pay my bills. I made sure that the production was done a full week before opening because I reasoned that a small company would tech, dress, and preview in a week. Many off-Broadway shows have even shorter tech schedules than that so this seemed completely reasonable. 

Wrong. They finally sent the schedule out and demanded that each of us block off a full ten days for tech, including six dress rehearsals and a preview. This meant that it overlapped with the show I was running. They were very frustrated when I told them this.

Along with sending out the schedule, they sent out artist agreements. Since my friend and I are completely candid with each other about contracts and payment, we discovered that he was offered a full 33% more than I was. I was hopeful that this was because they value lighting over sound, instead of because of our genders. Both are bad when it’s such a small scale production. The amount of money was also obscenely low and far less than we had both imagined.

We attempted to negotiate and they took it very personally. They tried to sell experience and publicity as payment and we were both upset by this. This is a small theatre and I doubt we will get any real press or attention from this. I eventually got them to agree to pay me what the lighting designer was originally offered.

Next were equipment bids. In design meetings, we had discussed wanting speakers all over the stage and house to create a completely immersive environment. When I received their inventory list, I discovered that they had almost no equipment. I created a bid list with the cheapest, bare minimum things I needed and sent it.

 They obviously were not prepared for that. It totaled about $700, which is reasonable for what they wanted from this design. They tried to negotiate me down to almost none of the equipment but I told them I would walk if my design wasn’t represented with proper equipment. I’m all for small shows with small budgets, but the design I had created was exactly what they asked of me and really couldn’t be done adequately with two old speakers. They finally agreed.

By far the biggest problem has been the lack of communication. The LD and I will send very professional emails asking for information and we will either not receive a response or receive one a week later. This is not acceptable. We cannot do our work if we don’t know information. We go into tech this weekend and a Stage Manager was just brought in LAST NIGHT. Hopefully this will get better, but I anticipate this show not opening on time.

Wish me luck friends.

stuff you REALLY need in your new apartment!!

I keep seeing that HUGE ASS post about all the ‘essentials’ for your new apartment and I call 100% bullshit on it. You don’t need all that crap. You’re on a budget. Either  a student or just graduated or its your first job and you just moved out from your parents’ house and now you’re on your own with barely any money after paying off the rent.

I’m a student in the UK. I moved into a new place literally 2 weeks ago. I know my shit about essentials right now. So here’s a list of stuff you REALLY need! Also where you can find it cheap b/c lets face it you won’t go buying at Marks&Spencer (UK peeps will get me, not sure about the rest of the world. Its basically a high end grocery shop but it also has like homeware n stuff.

Btw since I’m in the UK, I’ll mention specific cheap UK shops as that’s what I know. Americans you can go to Walmart or other cheap discount stores or thrift stores for some items!! Which you probably already know.

Still, there’s a lot of this you can buy gradually and not all at once so it won’t make you feel like you’re going for broke within seconds.

SO ANYWAY

  • bedsheets. chances are, your mum might have like 30 spares stashed in her cupboard so if your new place has a bed that is the same size as a bed at home, you go ask your momma. if not, Primark and Wilkos has cheap ones AND they have cute designs too if youre into that
  • towels (have spares of each one you need!)
  • blanket of some sort. you can get some cheap nice one or bring your fave from home - it’s perfect for a binge watch session on the sofa or as a superhero cape
  • cutlery set. Wilko’s has a set of 16 for like £2 so get on that shit. Ofc you might only need it for 1 person so feel free to do that
  • dinner set. for one or for 4 depending on if you’re planning to have people over
  • Tupperware. for home made lunches and leftovers
  • mugs and glasses. you dont need a lot, but you might also not want to wash the only one you have every second
  • pots and pans
  • set of sharp knives. i got a nice one off amazon for £10
  • cutting board
  • wooden spoon, spatula, grater, can opener, ladle, whisk, kitchen scissors, strainer - all those little things that are super useful
  • baking tray - those oven bake chips have to go somewhere
  • kettle
  • toaster
  • microwave (chances are, it will come provided with your place if you’re in student accommodation in the UK. or you can use the oven)
  • kitchen foil and cling film
  • resealable food bags - its cheaper to buy e.g. meat in bulk and then freeze it in 1 meal portions. bags are helpful with this
  • kitchen roll
  • oven glove (safety first!!!)
  • tea towels, toilet paper
  • scourers, cloths for cleaning
  • mop and dustpan/brush 
  • clothes hangers - if your places comes with a wardrobe, i can guarantee you there’s like 2 there and that’s it
  • cleaning products: washing up liquid, bin bags, kitchen/oven cleaner, bathroom cleaner, white vinegar (this is optional! good for cleaning glass/mirrors, kettles (yes those need cleaning too) and refrigerators), window/glass cleaner (or white vinegar - its cheaper!), toilet bleach, laundry detergent, furniture polish
  • bathroom stuff: a small bin, tooth brush cup, toilet brush, shower rug
  • small mirror
  • some candles + lighter if the electricity dies on you
  • list of emergency contact numbers in an accessible place: so repairman, your landlord, your parents, close friends, police/ambulance/fire department (when you panic you forget the simplest things sometimes), gas and electric company, same with water. if you’re in the uk, the local council
  • waste bin
  • food: my suggestion for basics is a few  pasta sauces, large bag of pasta (like 5kg) or rice, bread, butter/spread, milk/milk alternative, eggs, vegetable oil, salt, pepper something for your sandwiches and a few ramens for when you really don’t feel like cooking. tea and coffee too, but that’s personal preference. things like chips, chicken nuggets, frozen mixed vegetables can be found cheap and are easy to make so keep those if you like them. fresh fruit and vegetables are a saviours, but they can be pricey. tap water is ‘free’ (you pay for the water so technically not but its cheaper than bottled) and if you don’t like the taste pick up a filter jug when you can.

I hope this helps someone!! I’m sure I forgot /something/ but this is the bare bones of it. 

It’s almost five months. It will be at the end of the month. But I never took a before selfie in sports clothing. I’m not sure I could actually GET into any of my workout gear then. But here we are this morning for comparison. My tummy today looks bloated as I’m still getting over the bout of gastroenteritis I just had. But it looks better huh. The work is paying off. Looking forward to the official five months progress now 💪🏻👌🏻✌🏻️👊🏻👍🏻🎉

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anonymous asked:

Have you played Sakamoto, Soma & Hachiro's route? If yes, what are your thoughts about them?

I have actually, all the way through, but it’s been a while. If it says anything I’ve started an itabag with the badges I have for all three since I’ve taken to collecting stuff of theirs along with Hijikata XD

Not sure quite what to say, at this point with the localization only about two months away I don’t want to give away more than I already have, but they are good routes. Honestly, I’m not sure how to decide which one I enjoyed more. 

Putting in a cut, as always, for spoilers…

Keep reading

My experience of trying to make new friends and exercise are surprisingly similar. They’re both hard, require surprising amounts of mental energy, and before both I always have the powerful urge to say fuck it, I’m just gonna stay inside by myself and watch dumb TV all afternoon. But if you work consistently and repeatedly at both, they begin to pay off after a while, and, hopefully, lead to a lot more long-term happiness.

I’m never sure whether I like big groups or small ones more. One-on-one hangouts have a risk of awkward lulls in conversation (which is also true of online dating–actually, there are a lot of similarities between trying to make friends and trying to date, except in the second case people rarely do it in large groups anymore), but in big group chats I find it easy to end up on the outside of everything while it just sort of passes me by. This is a *lot* worse if the language of the room isn’t one you speak very well. But I’m getting better at forcing myself to make relevant contributions to the conversation, though I dunno if I’m an *interesting* conversationalist exactly.

One-on-one there’s also more room to talk about each others’ arcane interests and go off on tangents about your personal history, and both of those are things I really enjoy. I also think one symptom of my inherent shyness is overthinking the grammar of conversation, turn-taking and that sort of thing, which is inhibiting in large groups where I don’t know most of the people well.

I used to describe myself as an introvert, but that’s not true, really; while I do need a certain amount of alone time, I really like people, and meeting new people, I just sometimes have to force myself to participate. One of the skills I hope to master in my adulthood is being relaxed and engaging in social situations, and while I’m still terrible at both, I’m definitely getting better.

Open rp

Jess let out a quiet groan, burying her face into her pillow. Gods above these spells were causing her no end of trouble and well…she wasn’t quite sure how to help herself out. Apart from the obvious answer, she just had a feeling that wouldn’t enough. Not this time. She sat up, nibbling on her lower lip. Planning to do a risky thing but it might just pay off…maybe. She grabbed her phone, snapped a picture of what she was wearing and made up a number off the top of her head before texting that number and sending the picture to them

{Picture attachment}

{Text: Hi there stranger. Hope i’m not interrupting anything}

If your entire business relies on your server, be sure to pay your Network Engineer.

A summer’s afternoon I found myself in the rafters of a warehouse meticulously spacing out zip ties at 3’ each (92cm) running CAT5e cables capped off with shielded RJ45 ends. I am a man who is very particular about his wiring and this day was no different. By this time I was about 6 days into the job and my big bundle of 48 cables was almost done. The veins of my network were spread throughout the building and everything was beautifully measured off and bundled together in a trunk of cables held together by velcro binders and color coded zip ties.

All in all I had spent over $3000 worth of time in this project and well over $5000 worth of equipment. The day came to collect payment. The payroll person wasn’t there so I dropped off the bill on her desk. 1 day passes. 2. Almost a week before I call them and ask them about it and they give me the run around.

I did it as professionally as possible. I emailed, I called, I left messages and nothing. The bill was sitting at $3500. I thanked my providence to have had them pay for the equipment before I installed everything.

3 weeks flew by and they stopped answering my calls specifically and my emails. It was time.

I sent them an email telling them that at the 30 day mark, as per our agreement of non-payment the bill would have a late fee of 25% and I would shut down their server.

Early on the 30th day, I logged into their server and changed the passwords and set it to shut down. I had a BIOs password so there was no way they were going to have someone else come and reset the server, they’d lose everything. All of their data from the last 5 years was locked onto that server and I waited.

At 8:00am the next day I got a frantic call from the owner telling me something was wrong. I asked him to check his email and he told me that he read it but that they needed the server back on. They were “losing so much money.”

So I went over and walked inside and was greeted with disingenuous smiles and fake hellos. The owner talked to me about pleasantries and started leading me to the server. I asked him if he was serious and that I wasn’t doing anything until I got paid for the job + the late fee. That’s when everything kind of went to hell. The owner got really upset and started trying to string together something coherent and eventually just got up in an angry huff and proceeded to have the payroll person type me up a check.

I took the check and left directly to their bank to cash it after telling them I’d be back in an hour or so. I took the money and banked it at my bank. Once I got back I forgave them for trying to guess passwords of the BIOS and logged back into the server and started everything running. I billed them for my time and got payment before I left.

I never heard from them again.

I’m sick and pissed off.

I came down with a cold Monday and have felt like shit all week. If I had insurance I would have gone to the doctors by now, because I’m pretty sure I have an ear infection. Now just because I don’t have insurance doesn’t mean I can’t go to the emergency room. By law if I show up at the emergency center they have to treat me… I will end up with a bill I can’t pay, but hey I still have “access” to healthcare though.

But because I don’t want anymore medical bills I can’t pay, I’m not going to go that route unless I absolutely have to. And while I wait for my body to fight off the infection, I’m going to sit here and reminisce about Italy.

Now I know it’s not perfect over there, but when one of the girls accidentally ingested some pine nuts not knowing she was allergic, our tour guide brought her not to a hospital, but one of the many pharmacies that could be found all over Florence. She was treated (by an actual doctor) and we were all on our way with an hour, with no cost.

I think of that and fume. The US is one of the richest countries in the world, yet we still don’t guarantee affordable healthcare for all of our citizens. The ACA (aka Obamacare) isn’t perfect, but at least it’s a small step in the right direction, yet as I type Congress is trying to replace it with a pile of garbage that would only make things worse. Sure the only plan under the ACA that I can afford is garbage that is not worth spending money on, that doesn’t mean I want the law repealed.

Make it better. Make it actually affordable to all. Hell, give us a damn public option. I know it’s a pipe dream, but something has to change.

I always joke about running away to Canada and my husband will tell me about all the Canadians he knew who were not happy with their healthcare or the one’s wife who had to be on a waiting list for cancer treatment. I don’t care if there is a wait, at least there you know that if you get sick you won’t end up destitute. If I lived in Canada I could go to the doctor and get my damn ear looked at without worrying over the bill.

If I came down with cancer I could not see a specialist without first paying money up front in the US. A doctor’s office isn’t like an emergency room. They don’t have to see you if you don’t have the money. I found that out when I was having a miscarriage years ago and instead of going to the emergency room went to an OBGYN. Before we even sat down in the waiting room the receptionist loudly, and rudely, demanded payment. Then the doctor talked me out of a D&C because it would cost me thousands of dollars upfront, due to my lack of insurance.

The whole ordeal was humiliating and I could have gotten very ill if I hadn’t passed the miscarried fetus on my own. When I finally got insurance and saw a new OBGYN she told me I was very lucky, and could not believe the other doctor made no mention of the ricks of not having a D&C. Would that have happened in Canada? Probably not.

I know the USA isn’t the worst country to live in and others have it far worse than us…. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t fight to improve our nation. Just like we should not give up on healthcare just because no other country has figured out the “perfect” option. Just because government healthcare isn’t perfect in other countries, doesn’t mean we should dismiss government mandated healthcare out of hand. Even the imperfect system of Canada, Germany, or Italy has to be better than what we have now… it has to be.