but it feels relevant to me right now so here


CN: sexual assault, pwr bttm


About PWR BTTM: this brought up a lot for me, but I don’t want to center my feelings in this conversation that is about more important things. Still, many of you have been asking what my general thoughts are, and I don’t think it’s fair to not respond to you, or for my silence to look like I am cosigning Ben’s actions. So here is my most important/relevant thought right now:

I want queer youth (and everyone, but particularly queer youth) to feel safe and loved and valued. To think of somebody taking advantage of spaces like that, spaces where young queer people seek respite and validation and safety, fills me with more anger and sadness than I can possibly express.

I know that when LGBTQIA+ people connect to queer art it is sometimes something bigger than just “liking a band.” I want you to know that we (me and anyone playing in my band) don’t take that lightly and will always try our best to do right by you. I want to say that you deserve nothing less from any person or artist you encounter.  And, most importantly, I want to say that whatever strength you take from art made by queer people is something that YOU found in yourself, it is not anyone else that gives it to you and to pretend otherwise is to disempower you (and you are powerful and you are good).

I want to say to people who are grieving Ben’s actions who aren’t survivors: don’t forget there is a painful hurt being felt here beyond losing a band. I want to say that I hope people can continue to hold Ben (and other people in our communities) accountable without perpetuating homophobia and transmisogyny. I want to stress that pwr bttm’s music is irrelevant to this conversation, let’s not trivialize this issue by making it about whether or not you like an album.

To end with, I want to pass on this link of Jes Skolnik talking about accountability wrt this situation moving forward and what that could look like:  https://medium.com/@modernistwitch/on-accountability-d79957d1a17d

(thank you to Jes for doing the work of writing that, and thank you to my two friends who idk if want to be named but read over this post for me before I posted it)

Love you

Going through my songs on Spotify
  • Me: I need to do a bit of a clear-up. What songs on Spotify do I really listen to anymore?
  • Me: (sees a particular song) Aha, this song doesn't appear to interest me anymore.
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Me: ...
  • Me: Wait a minute though, what if this works really well for my Cherik ship?

Not gonna lie as much as I’m loving this brief time off right now, I’m also hating it at the same time. I love being busy, keeps me occupied and makes me feel like I’m still relevant after all these years. But at the same time I love the lie ins and doing nothing. I’m basically a woman, I can’t make my mind up. So while I’m sat here debating what I should do with my weekend what is everyone else up too? Free coffee and donuts for anyone who entertains me.

Not gonna lie as much as I’m loving this brief time off right now, I’m also hating it at the same time. I love being busy, keeps me occupied and makes me feel like I’m still relevant after all these years. But at the same time I love the lie ins and doing nothing. I’m basically a woman, I can’t make my mind up. So while I’m sat here debating what I should do with the rest of my week what is everyone else up too? Free coffee and donuts for anyone who entertains me.

I went to the Regional of First Robotics Competition in Mexico City the past two days. I was the only woman in my team of 16 people. As far as I could see there was not a single all-women team. But entirely male teams were common, and the few girls attending were often referred to as the “cheerleaders”

These are a few of the various sexist comments I received in the past two days. The ones in italics were said to my face. 

  • She is the sex appeal of the team. 
  • So, which one of them [ meaning my teammates ] is your boyfriend? My gf is the Safety Captain too. 
  • Dude, ain’t them afraid she’ll mess something up? She is tinkering with the robot!
  • Can you tell one of the guys to pass you the wrench so that you can give it to me?
  • They will not gain any extra points if the girl doesn’t smile more. 
  • Journalist:  I can come back later when the person you are holding the spot for is back. 
  • Your team should really uhm… [ staring at my cleavage ] invest in more flattering outfits for the cheerleaders. 
  • “Do you think she is single?” “Yeah, but I don’t think the guys will appreciate it if we steal their chick.”
  • Is someone that actually knows about mechanics here?
  • Can you lend me a hammer? It’s the one that looks like Thor’s tool. If you can’t find it I will help you, babe. 
  • I told you only fat girls got into these contests. 
  • “They are actually letting her into the driving team?” “Maybe it is to distract the others.”
  • It’s a shame they don’t let you use skirts here, right? You must feel very unfeminine. 

So don’t you dare telling me that feminism is not relevant now that women can vote. Don’t you fucking dare telling me that fighting for women’s rights is a waste of my time and I should choose another field of work. 

caeillian  asked:

Hey! There's one thing I wanted to ask you about Misha's statement that Cas doesn't feel loved and that he's about to do a very bad decision, deal with the devil, etc. I can't quite grasp why Cas doesn't feel loved, at least by Sam and Dean - I mean with the Darkness on the run and his PTSD-like behavior, clearly everything isn't at it's best now. But just at the end of season 10 he said that both boys are like a family to him, and after he was cursed, they did everything to cure him (especially

Dean with his hands-on approach, if you know what I mean!). Okay, they had that argument at the end of 11x06, but all of that together, I don’t really see why Cas should feel so unloved in this situation right now. Or am I missing something important here? - Greetings!

Hello! And thank you for asking! I mean, thanks for asking me anything at all, because I don’t know how relevant my answer is going to be, but I’ll do my best. I like answering questions. I’m the nerd whose favorite part of school was taking tests. :D

As far as Castiel’s current mental status, and why he’s possibly feeling uncertain about his standing with the Winchesters, I think a lot of that comes back around to his PTSD. And I’m not even calling it PTSD-like. It’s PTSD.

Not that Sam and Dean don’t deal with it themselves on a constant basis, but learning to cope with this sort of trauma is relatively new for Cas. He may have suffered with it in the past, but he’d always been sent back for the sort of “reprogramming” we saw Naomi administering back in s8. His eons of awful memories were wiped away in the past. Naomi implied that he’d done many horrible things (like slaughtering the first born sons of Egypt), that he had no memory of due to his constant need for reprogramming.

Even when he was human in s9, and had suffered greatly, he was able to eventually pull himself out of his funk and get back up on his own feet (and then got some of his mojo back by stealing another angel’s grace). I think he was hoping that getting his own grace back would’ve helped that same way, but as all the angels have been telling him for more than a year now, when they look at him they don’t see an angel anymore. I think his own grace is fundamentally changed from what it was when we first met him back in s4. It’s not just the “human” part of Cas that’s grown, but the part of him that is his grace has also been changed by his experiences and emotions. And no one’s around to reprogram him anymore, which I’m glad about at any rate.

Now, he’s not only cut off from all his “family” in Heaven, he’s also feeling the crushing weight of what he’d done while under the attack dog spell, he’s been called useless by angels, told YET AGAIN that he’s not one of them, watched his only ally and friend left in Heaven die trying to help him the only way they could (rip Hannah we will miss you), and then killed three other angels to save himself. And nearly killed an innocent human woman, before then nearly killing Dean. Again.

On top of that, add the layer of guilt for lying to and essentially betraying Dean all last season while they were looking for a cure for the Mark. When he found out his actions helped release the Darkness, I can only imagine that took away 90% of the joy out of having learned that Dean was “cured.”

There were a nice couple of episodes in there where Dean and Sam actually seemed to be trying to help him recover. They tucked him into the bunker, helped him try to locate his car, involved him in hunts however indirectly (over the phone in 11.04), and introduced him to the joy of Netflix and cozy blankets.

The Winchesters have been dealing with mental and emotional trauma their whole lives. And yeah, they fit a lot of the classic signs of PTSD (nightmares, sleep disturbances, depression, self-destructive behavior, anger, emotional detachment, etc.), but that’s any given Tuesday for them. They may not be shining beacons of mental health, but they’re numb to it enough to keep on soldiering on. For Cas? This isn’t supposed to be happening to him. He’s supposed to be an angel of the Lord. He’s floundering.

While it’s great that Dean and Sam have been trying to encourage him to rest, recuperate, and heal back at the bunker, Cas has sort of taken that too far. It was cute when he was watching OITNB and The Wire, but now he’s watching infomercials and Jenny Jones reruns… and I’m scared for him. He looks like me at the depths of a bad depression. It’s not cute anymore.

And then he goes to try to help Sam and Dean when they call for him in 11.06, when just reaching for the doorknob out of the bunker gives him such a severe flashback that he’s paralyzed with fear and self-doubt. The only thing that gets him moving is a lead on Metatron’s whereabouts. Metatron being one of the only possible beings that can help him, both with the Darkness and the angels’ problems in Heaven.

What Metatron tells him, essentially, feeds right back in to all of his doubts. He’s not welcome in Heaven anymore. He’s only with the Winchesters as long as he’s useful to them. They’ll kick him to the curb again just as soon as he fails them, like he always fails. Sure he puts on a front for Metatron, claiming that his words don’t have any power over him, but in that weird way Metraton seems to have, we know his words hit right at the heart of Castiel’s doubts and fears. And then he leaves Metatron “in traction,” so he obviously beat him to within an inch of his life. Yikes.

So even if Sam, and especially Dean, are showing as much care for him as they know how to in the midst of an all-hands-on-deck crisis situation, there’s still a lot of unresolved tension going back to before Dean was cured of the Mark (oh my heart do I even need to mention what?), everything that Cas has been through this season, and the fact that he now seems to have been sidelined to sifting through ancient libraries looking for lore on the Darkness.

For reasons obvious to us, Dean’s not going to want to let Cas get within ten miles of Amara after watching her dissolve three angels without blinking. Dean’s also suffering his own dissociative issues about the effect Amara seems to have on him, as well as his apparent inability to hurt her (at least she doesn’t seem to be able to hurt him, either, which yay, I guess?).

Cas was not consulted about following up on Sam’s visions about having a chat with Lucifer. I think he’s going to be incredibly disappointed in both Sam and Dean about that. Not only wasn’t he consulted, but he was very conspicuously not even MENTIONED in the episode, despite the fact we know he’s one of the few beings on the planet who’s ever even SEEN the cage in person, and might’ve been able to find something out about Sam’s visions without putting Sam directly at risk. Who knows? But I feel his complete absence in the episode was deliberate. It’s going to be important when he meets up with Dean again.

While I was hoping all of this would come to a head and Dean and Cas would get a five minute break to hash out their crap, this is Supernatural, so I imagine they’ll only have enough time to do a basic, “You okay?” “Yeah, fine.” kind of exchange that they’ve been settling for in the last little while. I think Dean’s going to catch Cas up on the situation with Amara, and then the potential situation with Sam.

According to the plot synopsis that just came out for 11.10, Sam’s going to be busy trying to avoid paying a “steep price” for Lucifer’s aid, while Dean and Cas are trying to figure out if that laser beam from Heaven could’ve killed Amara. Being that this is a synopsis, I’m assuming that’ll cover about half of the first segment of the episode.

So, yes, Dean and Cas will be working together, which means that, yes, Cas knows Dean trusts and cares for him. BUT! With Sam trapped in the cage with Lucifer AGAIN, I think Dean’s gonna flip out. Again. and Cas is gonna do the sad nod lip pout and volunteer to throw himself on the pyre in order to save Sam. AGAIN. Even if that’s not what Dean would want (I’ll say it again: the doofuses REALLY need to talk to each other). Cas is at such a low point, and he KNOWS how much Sam means to Dean.

I don’t think he feels entirely unloved, but depression lies, and he is clearly and unequivocally depressed right now. He needs Dean to spell it out for him, that yes, he’d do practically anything to save Sam, but he’d also do practically anything to save Cas. And Dean’s proved it to US several times already this season (how much of his argument with Sam in 11.01 was about getting out of that hospital because they needed to save Cas? How many other times has Dean gone to extraordinary lengths to make sure Cas was safe?) He just needs to prove it to CAS.

Sadly, I think Cas’s actions over the next couple of episodes might very well give Dean that chance.

On the up side, that’s probably give us another opportunity for these idjits to actually talk to each other honestly, and hopefully just freaking kiss already dammit.

And yeah, he really does believe that Sam and Dean are like family to him, but he’s also given up armies for them, made deals with Crowley for them, taken on the souls of Purgatory for them, fallen from Heaven for them, etc. etc. etc. In the state of mind he’s in right now, It’s not a stretch to think he’d be willing to throw himself on yet another grenade for them, no matter how loved he feels. He might understand that they care for him, but I don’t think he realizes how much his loss would wreck the both of them. Especially Dean.

I hope he’s about to find out. And that everyone doesn’t suffer too much in the mean time. :/

So, thank you for asking me a question! As much as it hurts to think about Cas in this state, there is a tiny silver lining around this whole cloud of Darkness. I hope this actually addressed your question in some way. I think I may have rambled just a bit. Sorry it took so long to answer, and greetings to you, too! :)

XSEED Localization General Blog #1

Hey, guys,

This is Brittany again, Localization Producer at XSEED and lead editor for The Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel II and Trails in the Sky the 3rd. While it’s been a while since we’ve done a blog related to Trails, I’d actually like to save that kind of talk for another day and veer into a more personal direction with both the series and my place in the company as a whole. Get ready for some super deep real talk, friends.

A few months back, I was talking with someone who is currently around the same age as I was when I started with XSEED. He was saying how working in games was a dream job, but he was far, far away from anything related to the games industry, didn’t really know how to make his way in because he felt he had nothing special to offer, had never lived on his own, didn’t have any “real” goals with college…pretty much what anyone at 21 would say. I wasn’t much different.

My start in games was completely by chance. I grew up playing video games and loved them, but I was from a small town in the middle of nowhere with zero connections to anything related to games. I never liked school, but I loved working, and even if I didn’t have any particular goals in life, I figured I’d just stay in the small town I never liked and settle for government work and an easy, stable paycheck. Then, right before my 22nd birthday, I got completely plastered at a friend’s house, and in my drunk ramblings to my mother as she drove me home (don’t drink and drive, legally-able-to-drink kiddos), I told her I was going to leave home for the first time and move about 3,000 miles to live on an acquaintance’s floor for a few months while I started a new life in California. I didn’t know what I wanted out of life, but I knew it wasn’t what I currently had, so I figured it was about time I go searching. A couple months later, I did exactly that.

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Let’s talk local cultus, liminal spaces, and gateways to the underworld. 

The above photos are of Darwin Falls, in the California side of Death Valley. Springs, lakes, caves, naturally occurring wells, and the like have been written about as gateways to the underworld before; so it’s not super surprising to me that I got a lot of Haides and Persephone feels in this place.

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alright here’s my problems with the finale:
  • it did not wrap up 5 years of questions. it answered some questions, but it’s not enough to end a 5 year story like that.
  • sara, a character just now dropped in with NO motives, was used as a cop out so they didn’t have to use any other characters that are actually relevant
  • blonde hair, yellow tops and confusion was used as a completely ridiculous cop out
  • bethany, a character we have never met, plays a huge part in the story
  • cece dating her brother, REALLY?
  • while cece’s backstory was somewhat explained, there’s a lot of holes and ridiculous parts of it
  • charles still doesn’t feel relevant to the story and is so clearly unplanned. it doesn’t feel right that the whole backstory to the show was planned last minute. i feel cheated.
  • nothing feels complete and they expect me to accept a one minute hugging scene as the end of a 5 year story.
  • the time jump is completely unnecessary. they should have spent more time finishing the 5 year story than jumping ahead to something else.
  • it was shit writing and wasn’t at all fair to people that have been here since 2010 expecting something that would actually make sense. 

Jem Carstairs character aesthetic

“Every heart has it’s own melody. You know mine.” 


Takagi Manpei and Shinpei, twin voice actors who voice Yuuto and Yuugo respectively, were interviewed on the 8/2 episode of Animemashite. You can watch it on Youtube right here, starting from the 3:33 mark! Catch it quick, it’ll only be available until 15/2.

During their segment, they talked about their experience so far as voice actors. I’ve tried my best to transcribe what they said down below. I kinda omitted some of the hosts’ questions (sorry (・・;)) and a few inconsequential bits but kept all the fun and relevant stuff! 

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