but i've reached the point where i just don't care anymore

there’s been a lot of debate in this fandom about whether or not mature rated fics are appropriate or not, and i’ve been mostly quiet on it but i finally have reached a breaking point on the matter and felt i needed to get this out.

there’s a lot of grey lines as far as fic writing and circumstance in a fandom like gmw. for me personally, i don’t mind fics where they curse. i don’t really mind make-out scenes when they’re written at an older point. a certain amount of physical intimacy is fine, especially when it’s written tastefully and thoughtfully. that makes sense to me. i don’t mind it. i understand it.

what i have severe issue with is the sudden rise of explicitly sexual content being written in this fandom. i know it’s always been around and i know it’s in every fandom, but in a fandom like this it makes my skin crawl and i’ve finally reached a point where i can’t just sit around and tolerate it.

i want to be very clear about what i mean by explicitly sexual content. i don’t mean implied sexual situations. i don’t mean depictions of the characters making out. for me to be waving a pitchfork about that would be hypocritical – there were some lowkey make-out scenes in gotor, and as long as scenes like that are handled thoughtfully and with care (which i think and hope i accomplished in my case), i’m perfectly fine with that. i’m not talking about that. that’s not the issue here.

i’m referring to fics in which the entire premise is about sex, also known as “pwp” = porn without plot. that’s my issue here. that’s what i’m discussing here. that’s the distinction that i want to be very clear about.  i’m referring to the explicitly graphic fics that have been cropping up, that’s essentially porn with gmw characters names slapped onto it.

there’s absolutely no reason for there to be smut in the gmw fandom. there are tons of fandoms, tons of shows, where the characters are at an age appropriate place, the actors who portray the characters are not minors, where smut has a place and the consumption of it makes sense. i don’t have an issue with smut, i understand it’s place in fandom. but not this one.

“but we aged the characters up!!” doesn’t matter. i understand aging them up in some contexts to confront some other more adult issues (look at gotor), but doing it explicitly so you can put these minors in explicit sexual situations isn’t right. because the actors are still young (most are still minors), and regardless of whether they’re aged up, that’s the faces that people will be visualizing when they read this content.

rowan herself has already had to face gross sexualization, and has been vocal about her discomfort with it. people were counting down the days until peyton was 18 and “legal,” mostly by older members of the fandom. these are the role models of a younger audience and not our toys to sexualize and grovel over. and when we, the older members of the fandom, perpetuate that thinking and share that mindset with our younger followers, we’re only adding to the problem. there are plenty of adult actors for you to put in these fantasies. take it somewhere else.

the argument i’ve seen made CONSTANTLY is “if you don’t like it, don’t read it.” and i’m sorry, but no. that’s not okay. that’s not how this works. because this is a fandom of predominantly minors, and we all know what it’s like to be new in a fandom. for a lot of younger followers, this may very well be their first fandom. you’re looking for a sense of community. you don’t know how to filter through fics. you read what’s going around and you take what you can get.

i can remember being in the pjo fandom when i was young, and looking for fic and being uncomfortable with how sexual some fics were. it took me a while to realize that i didn’t have to read them, because i was young and trying to read what the majority was reading. yes, everyone is responsible for what they choose to read, but the younger members of fandom are still learning. they’re still figuring out what they’re comfortable with. and a fandom like gmw, meant for younger audiences, should be a safe place to figure that out. 

particularly as an older member of this fandom, we have a responsibility to make our blogs a safe space for the younger members of this fandom. the fact that i’ve received more than one ask, often on anonymous, expressing discomfort about the way their favorite characters are being sexualized in this fandom is disheartening and what really motivates me to speak up. because this isn’t about my personal experience – i’ve been on the internet for years now and have scrolled past enough pwp to last a lifetime. this is about my young followers who are genuinely uncomfortable with how relationships of their beloved characters – particularly ones who have been shown to have a relationship that is about MORE than physical intimacy – are being shown in a fandom where they’re supposed to feel safe.

as a writer, i’m all for people writing what they want to write and sharing the stories they want to see. but this is where i draw the line. this is not a matter of “don’t like, don’t read.” this is matter of respecting the young audience that this show was intended for. because this show was made for them, this fandom was made for them, and we don’t get to come in with our older life experience and suddenly make the rules about what’s appropriate and what isn’t.

Not Ready

Marinette is pregnant.  It was an accident, a late night at a club where she got drunk and went home with someone, but it’s still there.  She’s pregnant.  At least according to the seventeen pregnancy tests she took.  Alya’s away, and Hawkmoth seems to be on vacation, so she’s not able to talk to anyone until after she’s been to the doctor to confirm it.

She’s pregnant.

So she goes to patrol that night, the first patrol with Chat since she took the tests, and cries on him for a while.  She’s not getting an abortion–she’s pro-choice, but can’t do it herself–and she still has to talk to the father.

But Chat’s there.  He comforts her, says he’ll be there for her whether the father is or not.  He lets her cry on his shoulder for hours, and patrol never actually gets done.  They decide to meet up tomorrow night, even though it’s not a patrol night, so they can talk after Marinette talks to the father.

Which doesn’t go well.  Actually, that’s an understatement.  The father is furious at her for being pregnant, wants her to get an abortion, and wants nothing to do with the baby if she has it.

So Marinette leaves in tears, and skips her classes that afternoon and goes immediately to their patrol spot to just sit and cry for hours, waiting for Chat.

Chat left an hour early for patrol, barely having allowed himself to wait that long, and finds Ladybug already on the roof.  She tells him about how it went with the father and starts crying all over again.

“I’ll be it’s father.”

“What?”

“A baby needs a father.  Mine was never around, and I know that’s messed me up.  So I can be this baby’s father.  I mean, if you want.”

“I…I’d like that.”

So they sit there for hours until Ladybug’s tears subside, holding onto each other.  When they decide it’s time to leave, Ladybug suggests they reveal their identities because “I am not going to the doctor as Ladybug, and I am not having Chat Noir take me there.”

So they reveal themselves, and are freaking happy that they are Adrien and Marinette, because that makes introducing themselves to their friends much easier.

The next morning, Adrien is sleep deprived and freaking out because he spent all night on the internet looking up everything about babies and pregnancy and “should I propose, Plagg?  Do you think she’ll expect me to?  What do babies eat?  Oh god, what if there’s more than one baby?”

(he’s also spent an insane amount of money on baby clothes and stuffed animals)

So when Nino calls to ask why he’s late for lunch, you really can’t blame him for blurting out:

“I’m not ready to be a father!”

“…what?”

“I’m not ready, Nino!  What if I’m as terrible a father as mine?  What if I kill it?  What if it hates me?  What if–”

“Adrien?”

“What?”

“A father?”

“Yes!  I’m not ready!”

“…who did you get pregnant?”

(you also can’t blame him for hanging up and not going to lunch after all because Marinette didn’t want to tell anyone yet and he almost blew it with the first person he talked to)

They tell their friends a few weeks later, saying that Adrien and Marinette got drunk and hooked up one night, and no they’re not together but they’re both going to be in this baby’s life.

Alya and Nino are thrilled and decide that they are going to be godparents and Alya announces it on the Ladyblog (Marinette and Adrien laugh later about how relevant a post that really was).

The pregnancy goes well.  Adrien does not, in fact, propose, though he does discuss it with Marinette, who decides that maybe in the future, but only if they actually have a relationship together.  They get an apartment together, and Marinette has to hide Adrien’s credit cards because he’s a stress shopper and “we really don’t need six cribs.  You need to send some of them back.”

Ladybug disappears around sometime around the third month, Chat Noir fighting akumas on his own and bringing her the butterflies after for purification.  Chat Noir assures the public that Ladybug is safe and sound, and that she’s only disappeared because there will be a new little bug in a few months, and, no, he will not comment on whether or not this bug is also a kitten.

(Alya freaks out because “Marinette, your baby will be the same age as Ladybugs!  They’ll go to school together!”)

Adrien freaks out at every ultrasound, crying and squeezing Marinette’s hand.  He buys her whatever food she’s craving, and sometimes Chat Noir will be found begging at the door of a closing shop because “Ladybug needs pickles and chocolate fudge can you please stay open just another minute?” and because these stores will usually let Chat Noir in but not Adrien.

(Chat Noir also can’t go more than half a block without people giving him baby supplies.  Sometimes he has to refuse because “Ladybug would not be happy if I came home with a seventh crib.”)

(This leads to the rumours that Ladybug and Chat Noir are having sextuplets, which Marinette finds hilarious.)

(Adrien is just relieved that these rumours aren’t true because one baby is stressful enough and it hasn’t even come yet.)

It’s around five months when Chat Noir almost dies in an akuma attack.  Marinette watches on TV and begs Tikki to let her transform to help, but it would be too dangerous for the baby, so all she can do is watch and cry.  Chat stumbles in the window a while later, barely conscious and bleeding all over the floor.  Ladybug cleanses the akuma and it heals Chat, and they both release their transformations as Marinette throws herself at him, crying.

“I almost lost you.  You have to be more careful, Chat.  I can’t lose you.”

Neither of them notice, at first, that she kisses him.  It seems natural.  He almost died.  She was upset.  So of course she’d kiss him.

Of course, they do notice, and both make things awkward for a few hours before they decide that maybe they should try this for real.

The baby comes a few days early, and Adrien was at a shoot on the other side of Paris when he got the call from Nino.  It would take hours to get there, hours he doesn’t have because Marinette is in labour and he isn’t there and he is seriously stressing out.

So he ducks into an alley and transforms and races across the rooftops.

When he reaches the hospital, the nurses and patients in the waiting give him weird looks but he ignores them because he has to find Marinette.

He barges into Marinette’s room with a “Marinette!  I’m here!” and doesn’t know why everyone turns to stare.

Mr. and Mrs. Dupain-Cheng glance between their daughter and the man who barged in, squinting and trying to put the pieces together.

The nurse who had been checking on a machine drops her clipboard.

Nino narrows his eyes and closes the book he had been trying to distract himself with, rising in a defensive stance.

Alya takes a picture.

And Marinette?  Marinette bursts into hysterical laughter.

“You’re an idiot.”

“What?  I got here as fast as I could.  The shoot was on the other side of town.  I–”

“Adrien.  You’re in costume.”

He looks down at himself and groans because he knew he forgot something when he jumped off the roof.  He releases the transformation and goes to the bed, deciding to pretend like it never happened and asking Marinette how she’s doing.

“That means you’re Ladybug,” Alya says, not going along with Adrien’s plan to ignore his mistake.  “Right?  Because Chat Noir hasn’t said that Ladybug’s baby is his, but he also hasn’t been subtle about the baby being his.”

“Can we talk about this later?” Marinette groans out as a contraction hits.  “Preferably when I don’t have a baby trying to rip its way out of me.”

“Fine,” Alya agrees.  “As long as I get an exclusive about Chat Noir and Ladybug’s baby.”

Hugo Michel Dupain-Cheng-Agreste came into the world a few hours later, by which point all of Paris knew Ladybug and Chat Noir’s identities (becuase Chat Noir running through a hospital screaming for Marinette Dupain-Cheng was not very subtle, and it was common knowledge that Marinette was having a baby with supermodel Adrien Agreste, so Chat Noir’s own identity wasn’t a stretch) and the section of the hospital has to be cornered off to keep out the cameras and the fans.

Gabriel Agreste comes to see them later in the day, to visit his grandson.  He takes his son aside before he leaves, apologizing for being such a horrible father.

“I’ll be better to him, if you’ll let me be in his life.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

But Gabriel doesn’t answer, instead handing a small brown box to his son.

“I am so sorry.  I can’t do this anymore, not when it means hurting my family.  I hope you can forgive me, and that you’ll listen to my explanation one day, but I understand if you won’t.  You don’t have to worry about this anymore.”

And with that, Gabriel was gone, leaving Adrien alone and confused in the hallway of the hospital.  He looked down at the box again, it was so familiar but he couldn’t figure out why.  Slowly, he opened it.  Inside sat a purple butterfly broach.

It’s a few months later before Ladybug and Chat Noir make an appearance again, chasing each other across the rooftops and laughing, stopping in alcoves to kiss.

The papers the next morning feature this:  Ladybug with her arms around Chat’s neck, beaming as he kisses her cheek.  A green sling around Chat’s body, one of his arms holding it to his chest, the other around Ladybug’s waist.  And a baby, tucked in the sling, a little head with cat ears sticking out.

All of Paris turned up a year later to the long awaited wedding between Adrien Agreste and Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

REMINDER THAT THIS IS A FIC NOW

anonymous asked:

Might have a job away from customer service!!! it'd be only for the summer, but I am so excited, I'm ready to do anything other than serve food to snobby tourists all summer <3 only issue is that I'd be coming back in september... without a job at all. i've reached the point where I'm just too done with customers though, I don't even care anymore

anonymous asked:

Hey so I've recently started thinking I might have bpd based on some of the symptoms but I was wondering what fp and splitting were because I've seen those terms used a lot but I don't really know what they are

Hey anon! That’s a great question. There are a lot of terms associated with BPD that people probably never heard before they were diagnosed. The important thing to remember, though, is that just because this type of symptom exists in BPD, does not necessarily mean you will experience it.

Most of these things are very negative and undesirable ways to think or feel. I’ve seen this a little bit lately in the online BPD community, where one particular term or symptom will be almost glorified, and everyone starts talking about that one thing and how they feel that in their lives. I’m not saying they’re all not really feeling those things, but a lot of time we can create situations subconsciously if we innerly feel like it should be happening somehow.

These are not healthy patterns in behavior/thought, and we can save ourselves a lot of pain and difficulty if we actively try to defend AGAINST these symptoms. 

But I do understand how it is super helpful and validating to have a name or word for something, and being able to talk about it with others who have experienced it. That’s totally okay. For that reason, here are some common terms associated with BPD that might be a little confusing. Let me know if you think I should add any more to this list? Thanks! :)

Favorite Person (FP): A “Favorite Person” is a person that people with BPD tend to latch onto or glorify for sporadic lengths of time. We tend to just want all their attention, time, and focus. It’s not something we do on purpose, necessarily…we just become dependent on that person’s particular brand of attention as a way to simple cope with our emotions. An FP doesn’t even necessarily have to be romantic—it can be anyone that we somehow found solace or comfort in any given moment.

Imprinting: Imprinting kind of goes along with the “favorite person” idea, except I’ve only ever heard it referred to in a romantic context. It’s the sudden moment when you become dependent on the person, and pretty much all of your time, focus, energy, and devotion goes to that person. It’s seen as more of an involuntary situation. FP and Imprinting are NOT medical terms…more just relatable feelings within the BPD community.

Splitting: Splitting is a common pattern of thinking/conceptualizing in people with BPD. We tend to think of things as ALL good, or ALL bad. It doesn’t have to be about good/bad, it can be about anything. We can even love a person and hate them, too. We can feel wholly accepted and fully rejected. It’s really just about extreme opposites of emotion, and thinking it has to be one or the other, nothing in between. The terms “devalued” and “idealized” are often heard in context of splitting, meaning we tend to idealize people that we are close to by putting them on an extremely high pedestal and constantly looking up to them; and then we can devalue them, or consider them “worthless” to us, when we portray them to make a mistake. It’s a very unhealthy, subconscious coping mechanism our brains use to try to avoid intense anxiety or pain.

 See A Note on Black and White Thinking

Dissociation: Dissociation is a state where you feel disconnected somehow from your mind/consciousness. It can vary a lot in different people, from simply zoning out to having multiple personalities (Dissociate Identity Disorder). It’s a coping mechanism that our brain uses to kind of just “turn off” your thinking for a little bit, because it knows you can’t handle the intensity of your emotions/pain. Sometimes you don’t remember things from the periods you were dissociated, and a lot of people report feeling “hazy” or “blurry” about events or things that happened when they were dissociated. Dissociation can last for a couple minutes, hours, or even days. 

Depersonalization: Depersonalization is a specific type of dissociation, when you feel somehow disconnected from your body, like you’re watching yourself from somewhere outside of yourself. It can feel very surreal, almost dream-like, and is very disturbing to most people who experience it. It’s a more physical manifestation of dissociation, which can be very hard to describe. Physical, as in…you physically don’t feel connected to your body or the place where your body is at.

Apathy: Apathy is a general “I don’t care” feeling. We tend to kind of become emotionally unavailable, not really feeling anything. Some people describe it as feeling “numb.” This happens a lot when we feel like we’ve reached the end of our rope…”there’s no point in caring or trying anymore, because it just hurts when you do.” For me, it usually feels like there’s almost a block on my emotions. Like, there’s something blocking them in the back of my mind so they can’t get through. I don’t know if that’s typical for people with BPD, but that’s one way I personally experience apathy. 

Baiting: Baiting is a form of manipulative behavior, in which you purposely act a certain way in order to elicit the emotional response you want from someone. It’s definitely not healthy or interpersonally effective. When we’re in a highly emotional state, we tend to think of self-preservation, especially if we’re fighting with someone. So we unconsciously use unfair methods to try to simple save ourselves from the impending emotional intensity.

Mimicking/Mirroring: Mirroring is common in people who don’t have a firm sense of identity, which is a very typical BPD symptom. Mirroring/Mimicking happens when we see things we like in someone else, or other people in general, and we try to make ourselves be/look that way, too. It’s a desperate way to try to figure out who we really are underneath all of our pain and symptom, even thought it’s not typically anything we would do/look like.

Magical Thinking: It is possible for someone with BPD to be so emotionally/mentally overwhelmed that they start showing psychotic symptoms, such as paranoia, delusions, and hallucinations. Magical Thinking is a slightly more mild version of those psychotic symptoms. Magical Thinking is when we look at two completely unrelated things, and somehow draw unreal connections between them. For example, “I cut myself, and it rained. Cutting myself makes it rain!” Magical Thinking can also manifest itself in the form of idealization/devaluing. We create unreal or imaginary expectations for people close to us, or ideas in general (ex, “Ideal Love”).

Detachment: Detachment happens when we shut ourselves off from something completely. It could be from a family member, friend, certain situation, feeling, etc. The “Detached Protector Pitfall” is a very common BPD situation…when we detach from our own needs, and try to completely please somebody else. We stop caring about our own needs in order to fulfill those of someone else (typically our “FP,” but not in every case).

Maladaptive Daydreaming: This is another form of dissociation, in which we involuntarily become caught up in fantasies/daydreams. It is a coping mechanism our brain uses to try to save us from feeling the pain of our real emotional state. Maladaptive daydreaming can be very frightening, especially when you realize that you’re not really in control of where your brain is going at that point. It thinks about whatever it needs to think about in order to feel better.

5SOS Preference #15: Restless Nights (His POV)
  • Calum Hood: "He's still fighting?" I ask my wife as I lean against the nurseries door post. (Y/N) nods her head as she rocks back and forth on the rocking chair with Ryder on her chest. She rubs our six month olds back soothingly as he moans sleepily into her neck, trying his best not to fall asleep. We both been trying to put him to sleep for about two hours now. After he would fall asleep, us two would have our time alone but guess not. I sigh and walk towards them. "Want me to call mom?" I whisper as I take a seat on the foot rest of the rocking chair. "I don't know." (Y/N) says, her voice cracking. "He's not running a temp. I don't know what's going on." She places a kiss on Ryder's cheek and I notice that this is stressing her out. "We'll figure it out baby." I say after I place a hand on her knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze. (Y/N) looks at me with teary eyes. "Let me take him." I reach my hands out and she places him in my arms. "You're a fighter, little man." I say with a chuckle after getting him situated in my arms. Ryder looks up at me with sleepy and teary eyes. "Go to sleep, Ry. You're not gonna miss out on anything. Just close your eyes." I begin to rock him slowly, his eyes start to blink heavily but he still doesn't budge. "Sing, Cal." (Y/N) whispers and I can't believe I didn't think of that earlier. I nod my head and then begin to sing quietly a slower version of "Amnesia", earning an eye roll from my wife. She's probably over the song by now. Ryder watches me with heavy eyes and a miracle happens. His eyes close fully. I look up at (Y/N) as I continue to sing and she sighs in relief. She signals me to keep going and I do. I stare at our little, handsome prince as he snores quietly. After awhile, I stop, just waiting for him to wake up. But he doesn't. I get up slowly and walk towards his crib while (Y/N) follows. We each give him a gentle kiss on the forehead before I lay him down. "Thank you, Lord." (Y/N) praises after she covers Ryder up with a blanket. I smile and wrap my arms around her waist. "I believe it's our time to relax now, Mrs. Hood." I whisper before pressing my lips against hers.
  • Ashton Irwin: "Mommy!" I hear Austin scream for (Y/N) for the fifteenth time tonight. My bride sighs a little before getting out of bed again to go see our two year old. "There are monsters again!" Austin cries, clearly frightened. I get up and sit on the edge of the bed, rubbing my eyes. It's gonna be a long night. "Baby there's no such thing. You're okay. Everything's alright." I hear (Y/N) say, trying to soothe him. I look over to the clock next to me. 12:13 a.m. He's been going at this for an hour after he woke up from a nightmare. I breathe in before getting out of bed to go see them. "Shhh baby. Daddy's trying to sleep. He's got a big day tomorrow." I hear (Y/N)'s muffled voice through Austin's bedroom door. My heart drops when I hear his crying as well. "What's going on?" I ask as I open his door. They both sit on his bed, covered in a big blanket. (Y/N) leans her aching back against the wall, her growing stomach hides under the blanket, as Austin leans into her, crying into her side with her arm around him. "Daddy!" He cries once he sees me. I smile a little at my exhausted, little bug. I walk towards the bed and crawl onto it, joining them. "Daddy there's monsters." Austin says as (Y/N) rubs his arm. "Really?" I gasp and he nods. My wife shakes her head at me. She obviously doesn't want me to pretend that they are real. "Where?" Then Austin points under his bed. I nod my head before getting on all fours to check under his bed. "I don't see anything bud." I say. "Are you sure?" My son asks with concern eyes and I nod. "There's nothing. Don't you worry. You got me and your mommy. We'll protect you. And soon, you'll have to protect your baby sister or brother too." I say with a smile. Austin smiles widely and looks up at (Y/N) and she smiles down at him as well. "I can't wait." He says with a yawn. (Y/N) kisses his curly head. "I'm glad, kiddo." She whispers against his head. "Get some rest champ." I say as I get up. "You're going to see-" I stop once I turn around to see Austin sound asleep against his pillow. (Y/N) gets out of the bed slowly. "Well done baby." She whispers, giving me a kiss after closing Austin's door.
  • Michael Clifford: "Relax, baby girl. Just close your eyes. Daddy's got you. Shh." I coo as I rub my almost two year olds back. I rock back and forth slowly on the rocking chair while Aubrey holds my neck for dear life as she cries. "Mama! M-Mama!" She sobs into my neck. "She'll be back, Aubs. Mama will be here very soon. Just go to sleep, baby, I got you." I whisper. (Y/N)'s out for the night with the girls. She was hesitant to leave me with the kids but I insisted she should go, saying that the four of us would be just fine. She deserves it. She's been busy with work and taking care of her three boys and little girl. She deserves to be out for awhile. "I want mama now!" Aubrey screams, making me jolt a little. "Aubrey, what did I tell you about screaming?" I warn, thinking about her brothers sleeping peacefully in their room next to hers. She cries more, her tears soaking into my t-shirt. I pat her back gently while humming a nursery rhyme. Aubrey cries "mama" over and over again shakily and I feel like I've been sucking at being a parent. "Hey, hey, hey." I hear my wife whisper loudly. I relax and sigh in relief when I see her at the door. My hero. "Mama!" Aubrey squeaks out while getting off of me and running to (Y/N). She crouches down and opens her arms for Aubrey. "You should be sleeping little one." She says while kissing Aubrey's cheek after they embrace each other. "Why'd you go m-mama?" She sobs into (Y/N)'s neck. "Shhhh Aubs, you'll wake Zach and Nick." (Y/N) whispers while picking our little princess up. She walks over, giving me a smile and then mouthing a "hi" to me. I give her a small smile before getting up so she can sit down. She sits down and begins to rock back and forth. "Shhh baby. I'm here. A princess like you deserves her beauty rest." (Y/N) whispers to Aubrey. "L-like Princess Aurora?" Aubrey asks, referring to the princess from Sleeping Beauty. (Y/N) smiles. "Like Princess Aurora." She whispers. Once Aubrey quiets down, I walk out of the room to see the boys, making sure to close the door behind me so Aubrey can fall asleep without the light from the hall bugging her. After awhile, I watch (Y/N) walk down the stairs. I get up from the couch before she pecks my lips. "I'm a terrible dad, aren't I?" I mumble against her lips. "You mean awesome, right?" She asks with a smirk before I kiss her.
  • Luke Hemmings: "Luke, leave her be. She has to learn." I hear my wife mumble sleepily as I get out of our bed. "You know I can't do that." I whisper back gently while walking towards the door. Once I heard my little Ella's muffled cries coming from the baby monitor, I had to fight the urge not to get up and help her right then and there. After a good thirty minutes of her crying, I couldn't take it anymore. I walk down hallway to head towards Ella's nursery. "Daddy's right here, pumpkin." I say as I walk through her door. I frown a little at my almost one year old through the cribs rails. She sits on her bum with wet tears running down her red face. "D-daddy." Ella cries in relief before standing up and reaching for me. "What's wrong, huh?" I ask sadly while picking her up. I kiss forehead before she wraps her little arms around my neck. She tries to find her breath. "Breathe sweetheart. You're okay." I start to run my hand up and down her back slowly, trying to calm her down. I check to feel if she needs a diaper change but find out that she doesn't. She rests her head on my shoulder and cries more. "Someone's a little sleepy bug I see." I state with a smile before sitting down on the rocking chair. "No." Ella mumbles her new favorite word into my neck. I chuckle and begin to rock gently. She holds on tight to me, never letting go of me. "Daddy's not going anywhere, Ella. I'm right here." I coo. After a few minutes of doing rocking back and forth and rubbing her back, she quiets down and then cries again, trying to stay awake. "Don't fight it El." I whisper quietly. And then, just as I command, she quits fighting. Small snores escape her mouth. I keep rocking in case she wakes up again but she doesn't. I get up gently and walk over to her crib. I lay Ella down slowly as possible, very careful not to wake her up. "Sweet dreams pumpkin." I whisper after placing the blanket on her. I tense when I see her squirm a little but then she relaxes. I sigh and smile down at her. I turn towards the door and jump a little when (Y/N) leaning against the door post. She gives me a small smile as she reaches her hand out for me. "Come back to bed, Mr. Hemmings." She whispers as I place my hand on hers, then she pulls me back towards our room. I close Ella's door gently behind me, completely hypnotized by my wife's actions.

“Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These”
Summary: There is pain in dying, to be sure, but there is a different sort of pain in being the one left behind. Yona copes with her father’s death and the nightmares that follow.

In her dream, she is standing in her old bedroom, staring out the window as the sun disappears below the horizon, the sky stained crimson and gold.

She takes a step and the floor turns to glass under her feet, rippling out and up the walls, across the furniture, until the room is full of diamond, glinting bloody red in the dying light. And then blood really is dripping down from the ceiling, drop by drop.

One drop lands on her cheek and runs down her face like a tear.

The room smells like copper and death.

There is something in front of her. A body. Her father? She crouches down and reaches out to turn him over, but a shadow falls over them.

“I think,” Soo-Won’s voice says, above her, “you’re poisonous, Yona. Everything you love is warped, ruined.”

“That’s not true,” she whispers, hesitating, her hand trembling above her father’s shoulder. “It wasn’t my fault. I didn’t know-”

“No, you didn’t. You weren’t fast enough. What makes you think you’re fast enough now? What if next time, it’s one of your dragons stuck on the point of my blade?”

When he speaks again, it’s barely audible, his breath hot on the back of Yona’s neck.

“What if next time, it’s Hak?”

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3

Happy holidays @laegolass , I’m your secret santa!! ovo @secretsantawatch

I went with Pharmercy and a mix of the civilian au (in this case, undercover at a coffeeshop bc I love cliches), and the soulmate au!! This is the ‘everything is in greyscale until you touch your soulmate’ au

I really hope you enjoy it!!

+ bonus fic under the cut

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Preference #76: Reaction to you in a bikini
  • REQUESTED
  • Michael: "(Y/N), just please hurry up we want to get down to the beach before it gets too packed!" You heard your best friend yell from outside of the bathroom. You sighed as you grabbed a shirt and shorts to throw on over top of your bikini and opened the door. Michael's eyes were on his phone, but as soon as he heard the door open he immediately looked up, ready to leave and get into the car where the others were waiting. He stopped for a second then looked at you in complete shock. His eyes widened then traveled down to your now exposed body. You quickly put the shirt on and shorts, too, to avoid anymore of the staring. "I look fat don't I?" You suddenly asked, sliding on the shorts with a frown on your face. He quickly shook his head and just stared at you. "I - um - wow." He blinked a few times then you began to walk out of the house, Michael following behind you. "(Y/N), you have a ridiculously hot body. Why do you hide it?" You turned around shocked at what he said and got into the car without saying anything to him. The rest of the car ride you just felt Michael's stares at you and it made you feel confident.
  • Ashton: You had absolutely no idea why you agreed going out to the beach with the guys knowing you would be the only girl and they would be doing things you weren't completely into. You watched as they all jumped off the dock and huddled together talking, occasionally looking over at you. You just shrugged it off and continued to read the story you needed to read for English class. A few minutes later all of the boys were surrounding you, water dripping off their bodies. "(Y/N), put the book down and come in the water." Calum pleaded, reaching for your book. You pulled it away and looked at them all through your sunglasses. "You guys forced me to come, remember that." They all looked at each other then smiled at you and you became worried. The next second all of them had their wet bodies on you, getting you wet when you weren't planning on it. "What the hell?! You got my clothes wet!" "It'll dry. Especially because of how hot it is out here." Luke pointed out. You sighed and stood up, taking off your now wet shirt and shorts. You went to sit back down but all of their eyes were on you. Ashton awkwardly coughed and you stared up at them. "Jesus Christ." Ashton mumbled under his breath causing you to furrow your eyebrows. "What?" "Your body is just, Jesus Christ." You shook your head at your friends and got up, placing the book down and walking towards the water, them all eagerly following behind you.
  • Calum: "I will kiss you if you don't get in this pool right now." Calum shouted to you as he leaned against the side of it. You looked at him and laughed. "You're my best friend, I wouldn't care." You saw him lean his head on the side of the pool and then heard a groan. "(Y/N)!" He whined. You rolled your eyes at his behaviour and was about to go back into the house, but then you felt bad. You turned around and saw him pouting at you. "Okay, fine." You sighed as you took off your flip flops, then pulled down your shorts so they were at your ankles. You stepped out of them and grabbed the bottom of your shirt. You could feel Calum's eyes on you, but you didn't think much of it. Once the shirt was off you looked over at Calum who was staring at you. He licked his lips once then turned away from you. "I've been friends with you for a really long time and never have I seen you in a bikini and holy shit, (Y/N)!" Your cheeks flushed but you tried to ignore it and just got into the pool with him. His eyes never left you and he was glance down at your body every so often, but it didn't make you uncomfortable one bit, instead it made you feel nice that it had that effect on him.
  • Luke: "Luke, I need your opinion on which bathin suit to wear!" You called out to Luke who was sitting on your bed scrolling down his phone. "It honestly doesn't matter you'll look fine in either one of them." He sighed, continued to stare at his phone. You ignored him and grabbed the two bikinis and ran into the bathroom, quickly changing into the one. You liked it because it fit perfectly, but it was a little revealing in the upper area, not to mention the bottoms were barely covering your bum. You weren't necessarily used to being that exposed, but it was just a pool it shouldn't matter anyway. You opened the door and walked into the room standing close to Luke who was paying no attention to you what so ever. You cleared your throat very loudly and he looked up clearly not impressed until his eyes landed on you. They went extremely wide and he dropped his phone. It made a loud thud when it came in contact with the floor, but he didn't even bother to pick it up, all of his attention was now on you. "Holy shit." "Is it too revealing? I always thought my boobs were too out there, you know?" You looked down at your chest and tried pulling the top more to cover them, but it didn't do much. His eyes were glued to your body and he shifted on the bed, gulping. "No, no that is perfect, just wow, holy shit, (Y/N) you're hot." You furrowed your eyebrows. "Was I not hot before?" "No! I mean, yes you were, but I don't even know what to say besides holy shit." He took a deep breath and stood up, still looking at your body. "I have to go do something I'll be right back." He awkwardly coughed and made his way out of your bedroom, leaving you standing there laughing at his actions.
  • A/N: Hope this is good! I am a bit rusty, so here you go :)
First Kiss
  • Ashton: Another party thrown at your house. Another night of your brother dragging you into everything even though all you want to do was leave and find somewhere away from your house where you could read in peace. Not tonight. Never in fact. You are pulled out of your book by your brother calling your name. You look up and see the bottle in the center of the circle pointing at you. "I'm not even playing," you tell your brother. It wasn't a lie. You are sitting on the very edge of the whole party, curled up with a book in your lap and your headphones on, trying to drown everything out. "Rules are rules, sis. And you're at this party. Into the closet you go," he tells you. You start to protest, but he's so much larger than you and just drags you to the closet, shoving you inside. You don't even know who you're in here with. This game was some hellish mixture of Spin-the-Bottle and Seven Minutes in Heaven, just what you needed. You feel a hand reach out to you, settling on your arm. You jump at the sudden contact. "Hey, hey, relax. We don't have to do anything if you don't want to. I'm Ashton, by the way," the guy says. Your breath catches in your throat. Your brother had shoved you in here because he knew you had a massive crush on Ash. You stutter out your name and he chuckles. "Figures. Your brother knows I think you're pretty," he tells you. "You think I'm what?" Your voice cracks at the end. "Pretty. I think you're pretty and different. You've always got a book in your hands and your cute little glasses on and you're never actually part of our parties. You just, you fascinate me and I never thought you'd ever speak to anyone, let alone me, and I'm rambling now, so I'll stop." You don't know how to respond to his confession. "Ashton?" you ask, deciding on a response. "Yeah?" he responds. You reach out for him, finding his neck in the dark, pulling him close to your body. He understands and his lips find yours in the dark, your first of many, many, many kisses.
  • Calum: Your head is on his lap as a stupid movie plays in the background. Your best friend is finally back from months on tour and you both are too busy catching up to watch a movie. "So, any new guys I need to beat up?" he asks casually. "Or are you still into that guy you said wouldn't give you the time of day?" You laugh and sigh before saying, "Still into that guy." Calum rolls his eyes and tells you, "Either man up and tell him or let it go. He's definitely too thick. You're great. He'll definitely go for you." You bite your lip, thinking if you should actually take his advice. After all, Calum is the guy you are hung up on. If that's what he'd want, you figure you should do just that. You sit up, facing him on the couch. "Cal, I love you," you say simply. "Love you too," he chuckles. "Do you want to restart the movie? I mean, neither one of us were really watching it." You let out a frustrated groan before saying, "No, Calum, I'm in love with you. You're the guy I'm hung up on." His eyes goes wide as they move to look at you. He swallows hard and whispers, "You're not serious." Your breaths start to become shaky because you're sure you just ruined over ten years of friendship in two sentences. "I'm serious," you say. Without hesitation, his lips crash against yours. You gasp in surprise, giving him an opportunity to slide his tongue between your lips. He pushes you back on the couch as his tongue moves expertly against yours. He's now hovering over you on the couch as your hands run up and down his chest. "I've wanted you to say that for over a year," he whispers against your throat where his lips now rest. You laugh, running one of your hands through his hair. You gasp in surprise when you feel his teeth dig into your skin. "Calum," you breathe out. "You're mine now," he whispers in your ear. "I'm making sure everyone else knows that."
  • Luke: You laugh at Luke attempting to sing in falsetto to the song playing on the radio. He laughs when he hears you laugh. You can't wipe the smile off your face when your laughter dies down. This has been the best first date of your life. A drive-in movie with a beautiful, funny, talent boy who knew to bring Sour Patch Kids and liked cuddling. Dates didn't get much better than that. You, despite your mother always telling you to never, ever, ever kiss on the first date, hope he will kiss you when he drops you off. You know you're falling for this boy, dangerously fast, but you're not going to stop yourself and you're pretty sure he isn't stopping either. When he pulls up to your house, he surprisingly gets out before you and opens your door for you. He walks you to your front step, still making you laugh with his bad jokes. "I had a great time tonight," you tell him as you reach your front porch. "Really? Good, because so did I," Luke tells you. "Can I see you again tomorrow?" You laugh at his eagerness. "Tomorrow? Aren't we rushing things?" He hesitates before he starts rambling, "Do you not want to see me tomorrow? I mean, that's okay if you don't, but I want to see you tomorrow. Hell, I don't want to stop seeing you tonight. You're just really pretty and funny and smart and so damn amazing and I'm not good enough for you, but I just don't care anymore. I really want to kiss you too, but I know I shouldn't since it's only our first date-" You cut him off by grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pulling him down to your level, your lips connecting with his for the first time. He doesn't hesitate to pull your closer, his hands on your hips. You part when you hear the front door open. Your dad is standing there with a disapproving look. You knew he wouldn't like Luke: skinny jeans, lip piercing, in a band. He was your father's nightmare, but he was your dream that was quickly becoming a reality. "Call me?" you tell him. "Oh, definitely," he smiles at you. He nods and waves awkwardly to your father before retreating to his car, your lips still tingling where they met his.
  • Michael: You are sitting next to Michael, Wii remote in your hands and another in his. "Let's make a bet," he tells you. "You win, I have to do something you want me to do. I win, you have to do something I want you to do." You frown and say, "My clothes are staying on, Clifford." He laughs and says, "I promise. It won't be like that." You sigh and give in, making the deal. It's absolutely no surprise when he completely destroys you in Mario Kart. You're terrible at it anyway, let alone playing Michael, who is pretty much the master of Mario Kart. When he wins, you turn to him and say, "What am I doing, Michael? What terrible thing do I have to eat or tweet?" He sighs as he takes the remote from your hands and sets it on the table with his. "I'm not going to make you doing anything. I'm going to ask," he says. "May I kiss you right now?" Your eyes go wide in shock. "You're actually asking?" you choke out. Michael nods softly and says, "I don't know, okay? I'm bad at this romantic stuff. You just, you mean a lot to me and I don't want to screw this up at all." You can't stop the smile forming across your face as you lean in closer to him before pressing your lips to his, shocking him with how forward you're being. He immediately takes over control of the kiss, but doesn't take it too far. When he pulls away, you pout softly. "What?" he asks you, a chuckle in his voice as he speaks. "Why did you stop?" you reply. "Because I'm an idiot," he sighs before kissing you again. This time he deepens the kiss, making you tangle your fingers in his crazy hair as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into his body. "My girlfriend," he mumbles when you finally pull away. "That wasn't a question, but I say yes anyway," you laugh, making him laugh with you.
Dawn is Coming, Open Your Eyes

‘Hey! Princess! Where the hell do you think you’re going?’

She’s a single step beyond the battered remnants of the wall, her lips parting against the sweet void of silence when he finds her.

A single step… From Finn. From Raven. From a hundred needy eyes.

A single step from impromptu scalpel blades, and muffled screams.

Blood to the elbows.

Love that isn’t hers…

And of course it’s him who sees her. Of course he’d have something to say.

'I’m taking a walk.’ She doesn’t turn to him as she says it. Just finishes the zip on her backpack and swings it over her shoulder.

'Are you insane?’ Leaves hiss furiously as he moves, no doubt striding towards her back, no doubt reaching harshly for her shoulder, right about-

He swings her around.

'After what just happened to Octavia? You’re seriously going out there - at dusk - alone?’

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DISCONNECTED PREFERENCE

Luke: 

I admit I’m a bit of a victim in the worldwide system too
But I’ve found my sweet escape when I’m alone with you

At school Luke was who everyone looked up to, who everyone wanted to be friends with. Who everyone wanted to be. He was basically the hottest guy in your school. Football player, a little bit of a bad boy, in a band; thank kind of stuff. He was a typical teenager. Everyone you knew had a crush on Luke (you had a pretty huge crush on him too, but you never liked to admit it).

You had always thought Luke wasn’t quite a distant person. Whenever he was with his friends he never seemed comfortable. But since everyone else believed he was you decided to too.

One day, your whole view on Luke Hemmings, the not-quite-perfect-teen, changed. You were in your last lesson of the day, English. Instead of sitting in his usual seat Luke sat on the other side of the room from you but one row in front. You dismissed this because you thought he was purely trying to get attention. Half way through the lesson you noticed someone staring at you, you glanced over in their direction, it was Luke. You tired to forget about him staring at you but it was impossible, you knew your cheeks were burning. So the only thing you could think of to stop him from staring was to stare straight back at him. You gave him a sharp stare as he just laughed and flashed a smile, revealing his dimples. Instantly, ashamed that your plan didn’t work, you looked down. Another 5 minutes later, Luke had stopped staring and was writing. In 2 minutes the piece he was writing was handed to you by the person next to you. Pretending not to care, you opened this letter as you read:

hey, i noticed you staring, maybe you’d like to stare at my face some other time, like after school. maybe we can get to know each other…

luke xx

A smile crept onto your face as you shook your head slowly, still staring at Luke’s scrawly hand writing. You scribbled down a quick okay then, see you after class… on the paper, folded it and handed it back to your neighbor.

You couldn’t wait till after class. You kept looking at the clock in hope that it would be the end of the lesson. Then finally, the bell rung out over the school, you glanced over at Luke who had a huge smile on his face. You waited till your teacher dismissed you to walk over to Luke. You didn’t want to seem too eager. but before you could even blink Luke was out of the classroom, this confused you. You felt a sinking feeling inside of you as the sad realization of the whole ‘Luke thing’ being a joke. You left school with your head held low. It was when you reached the gates when you saw Luke again, beaming, leaning on his crappy car. He walked up to you and kissed your forehead. You were, again, confused. What the hell was he playing at?

'Hi,’ he smiled looking down at you

'Hey,’ you half-smiled

'So-um-(Y/N) I was thinking if we could go back to my place for a bit and just-er-chill?’ he seemed so nervous. it was strange how someone so confident with everyone else could be so nervous in a certain persons presence you thought.

'Yeah sure,’ you giggled. He lead you into his car.

The two of you arrived at his place and his parents weren’t in, thank god! You followed him into his room as he told you to sit anywhere. He disappeared downstairs and and reappeared within 3 minutes with a tub of ice cream, cookies and a selection of films. Wow this was a different Luke to what you’d seen all these years at school. The cool, calm boy now seemed all precious and nervous. 

'I was thinking we could just watch a few films, chat and eat until you have to go…’ he looked at the floor then up to you.

'Yeah that sounds great Luke,’ you beamed. Luke and you sat/lay enjoying each others company for hours/ It had been quiet for a good 20 minutes when Luke said

'You know you really are something. I always see you at school, I think you’re gorgeous and amazing…’ he barely whispered looking at you. You turned your whole body to face him as you cupped his face in your hand and kissed him hard, passionately. In the end you both pulled away, speechless and giggling. Before kissing him again he said something that shocked you

’(Y/N), when I’m with you time stops, it feels like everything is beautiful and I never want my time with you to end. You know I only act like a bit of a dick at school to fit in. But when I’m around you, I feel I don’t need to pretend.’

Calum:

 

You are my getaway
You are my favorite place

Touring with Calum had been hard, incredibly hard. The two of you had never got time together any more. Even though it was better then being away from each other all the time it was still hard. He was either on stage, locked away in a security room before their concert, meeting fans, or too tired. It was chaos but he was dealing with it. You weren’t. You missed the old Calum. The old easy-going Calum.

It was another day of touring and meeting fans, but it was the last day of touring and meeting fans. The boys and you were happy, everyone could tell. Even though they loved touring sometimes it got too much for them at times. The tiredness would always defeat them, sometimes Michael fell asleep whilst eating breakfast. When the last show was over you could not contain your happiness. Cal got off stage, a massive grin on his face and filed his arms open to embrace you. Giggling the pair of you went to spend your last night in the tour bus before you left for home.

Two days later you and Calum were in Australia, lying in your shared bed staring at the ceiling.

'God I’ve missed this,’ Calum whispered

'Same, the past month has been so hard on the both of us,’

'I feel sorry for you babe, never seeing me,the reason you came on tour with me was to be with me, you hardly saw me!’ you knew he was getting angry and upset but you didn’t know why exactly.

'Calm down Cal, it’s okay. we’ve got each other now and that’s all that matters. My moments with you on tour meant a lot to me. Even though they were short lived, I enjoyed every second of them.’ You turned on your side, facing him, hoping Calum would do the same.

'I suppose…’ he turned over to face you, ’(Y/N) I just love you so much and I never want to lose any more time then I have to with you. In the middle of all this madness you and the boys. You mainly,’ he smiled 'are the only stable things in my life at the moment. When I see you or when I’m with you everything seems 10 times more beautiful then it already it. The madness stops and all I can think about is you.’ You planted a quick kiss on his cheek and laughed and said a quick 'I love you, Calum Hood,’ before being enveloped into Calum’s chest, his arms wrapped around you. And the two of you fell asleep, in a tangled mess of arms and legs.

Michael:

Turn off the radio
Those late night TV shows

You and Michael were caught up in your own lives at the moment, you never saw each other a lot anymore. You used to see each other every day, if it was at his house, your house, the mall, the park, anywhere. Michael and you had been best friends for over 7 years and you had been through everything together. You never saw each other as much anymore because as soon as his band hit the jackpot he was only home around 30% of the time and you were busy with college so when he was home you never had time or no one told you. You were happy for him though, ever since the day you met him you knew what he wanted in life and you knew that he would get there. Life, for you without Michael was boring. You never wanted to call him in case of the time zones or maybe it seemed like you were being clingy. You had almost got to the point where you didn’t care if it seemed clingy anymore, you needed to talk to your best friend. But there was always this horrifying thought in the back of your head that he would have forgotten about you.

You were sitting in your dorm, studying, when your phone started to ring. You immediately pounced on it. It was Michael, you let it ring once more before you answered it.

'Hello?’ a deep rasp called from the other line

'Michael?’ you answered

'Yes?’ he laughed

'Oh my god it’s you!’ you laughed. You were giddy with excitement and happiness.

’(Y/N), I’m so glad to hear your voice. I can’t remember how long it’s been since we last talked…’

'It’s been a while Clifford,’ you retorted with a sharp edge to your voice

'I know, it has been a while. I’m so sorry (Y/N),’ he sounded apologetic 'But I’m going to make it up to you this week!’

'Wait-What? Michael? What do you- oh my god I get it now!’ you laughed

'We got there eventually… Yeah so anyway this week, starts from now. Be at my place in 15 minutes.’ Before you could reply the line went dead. You got changed so quick and practically jogged to Michael’s house. You checked the time when you got to his door 11:05 pm. 'Quite late,’ you mumbled but you didn’t care; and of course to Michael the night was still young. You rang the bell and within an instant the door swung open to reveal a smiley Michael Clifford. He pulled you into a massive bear hug as you both laughed and smiled uncontrollably.

The night was spent watching films and catching up with each others life.

'I missed this and you,’ you said as The Breakfast Club came to an end.

'So have I (Y/N), so have I…’ he repeated

'We should do this more often you know,’ you blurted out 'watching films and ignoring everything else that happens in the world.’ you whispered

'Tuning out of everything else and just enjoying being with one another,’ he replied

'I couldn’t have put it better myself,’ you smiled as you looked up at him to reveal that he was wearing a smile on his face too.

Ashton:

And just be here with me

You were called into the Principles office, your stomach churning because you had no idea what could be wrong. You knocked three times on the door and the principle opened the door, looking grim. He told you to take a seat nervously wringing your sweat drenched hands. 

'Right (Y/N), I’ve got someone who needs to pick you up. Your mother has been taken into hospital after an attack. We, as a school are not aware of her medical position but you need to go. Your aunt is here to take you.’ You felt as if you had been punched in the gut. Still, you got up and walked shakily out of the school towards your aunt’s familiar car. The car journey was awkward, and to be honest you were relieved to get out the car.

In the hospital your aunt gathered most information. You weren’t allowed to know much but you knew her condition could be critical. In an hour or so you were allowed to see her. She was asleep or passed out, you didn’t know but seeing her just ate away your insides. You sat and held her hand, talking to her as if she was awake. The nurse came in 20 minutes later to usher you out, you planted a quick kiss on your moms cheek and left, just about holding back the tears.

As you wearily walked back to the waiting room you saw Ashton, your boyfriend of 6 months. He had obviously left school early to see you. In his hand he held a small bouquet of flowers, as soon as he saw you he rushed to his feet and hugged you. The oxygen was knocked out of your lungs as he squeezed you. You sat down and he sat next to you.

’(Y/N),’ he grabbed your hand 'Are you okay? Is your mom okay?’ he wrapped an arm round you protectively and kissed your hair.

'I don’t know, I don’t know anything…’ you sobbed as Ashton held you tighter

'Do you want anything?’ he whispered

'Just stay with me Ash, stay with me and don’t leave me.’ You looked up at him wiping away your tears

'Sure, anything for you (Y/N),’ he said calmly 'Everything is going to be okay. whatever happens you have me. I’ll always be here.’

okay so i hope you liked it, it took a while to write so yeah request and everything. ALSO idk should i do a part two???? send me a yes or a no please i just want to know (p.s sorry the ashton one was a bit sensitive i hope i didnt offend anyone i just ran out of ideas towards the end sorry) but yeah ily 

Preference- Your Child Runs Away
  • A/N: Zayn's is different from all the others and I'm not even sorry
  • Louis: Four times Louis had told your son James not to play football in the house, and yet the mischievous six year old was still kicking around the ball. He had nearly just knocked over one of Louis' Brit awards, and that was the last straw. "That's it! You're grounded, no football for a week," Louis says, taking the football and holding it out of James' reach. "Go to your room." James' eyes get wide; he has never been grounded before. "Dad, that's not fair! That's mine!" "James, I told you four times to stop playing in the house, and you still did. You live in my house, you live by my rules." Your son stomped off to his room, only to come out a few minutes later with his small backpack slung on his shoulders. "Dad, I'm running away," he declares, a determined expression on his face. Louis looks at him skeptically, remembering when he did this same thing when he was six, and decided to do the same thing his mum did to him. "Really, James? Why?" "I can tell that you hate me now. I'll leave so I won't bother you anymore." Louis sighs, a serious expression on his face. "I don't hate you, buddy, but you are six years old. I can't stop you if you really want to leave." James mouth falls open in surprise as he sees his dad reach into his pocket and pull out a few pounds. "Here's some money for the tube, and for a pay phone so you can call us when you get somewhere." The little boy is still speechless as Louis walks him to the front door. "I'll miss you, James. Maybe you can visit on Christmas or something," Louis says when they reach the porch, bending down to give James a hug. "Dad, you're letting me just leave?" James asks incredulously, and Louis nods. "You're six now, James, you're old enough to make your own decisions. If you don't want to live by my rules then I guess you'll just have to find somewhere else to live." James starts walking down the front walkway, taking slow, unsure steps. When he gets to the street, he glances back at his father, watching as Louis gives him one last wave and turns to go back inside. "Dad, wait!" He cries, running back up to him and jumping into Louis' waiting arms. "Dad, I'm really sorry I played football in the house. Please don't make me leave." Louis picks his son up, holding him tight to his chest. "I won't, James. I could never let you just leave. You're my partner against mum and your sister. If you left, I'd be all alone." The two go back inside, deciding to forget all about James' punishment.
  • Niall: "Shit." Niall cursed to himself when he opened up your six year old daughter Emily's room to find it empty and the window wide open. He had sent her to her room ten minutes ago after he found her eating a bowl of ice cream before dinner, even though she had been told multiple times not to. Niall had been having a rough day, having just got back from a small tour in America and being jet lagged, so when he discovered his daughter disobeying him, he let his temper get the best of him and scolded her rather loudly, causing the small girl to burst into tears and run into her room. Niall had calmed down a bit before going to Emily's room to talk to her, only to find her missing. His heart pounded in fear as he ran outside, frantically calling her name as he ran down the block. He reaches the end of the block and halfway through the next before he hears the familiar whimpers of his little girl. "Emmy," He says, his heartbeat slowing down when he sees her sitting against a tree, clutching her Hello Kitty book bag to her chest. She looks up at her father's voice, quickly running into his open arms, her tears creating a wet spot on his shirt. "'M sorry, daddy, I was gonna come back, promise, but I got lost and couldn't see home anymore," she mumbles, and Niall gently rubs her back, picking up her book bag as he starts to walk back to his house. "It's alright, Princess, I'm here. Daddy's got you," he whispers to her, "Don't you ever do that again, Emmy. I was so scared." Emily bring her head up to look at him, their identical eyes locking. "I'm sorry, daddy. I love you." Niall chuckles lightly, kissing her cheek as he responds. "I love you, too, Princess. Daddy's sorry for yellin' at ya earlier."
  • Zayn: You had passed away from cancer about a year earlier, leaving Zayn and fifteen year old Ally alone, and lately, the two have been distant and rude with each other, not quite knowing how to cope with their feelings without you there. So, when Zayn comes home from the studio one day to find the house empty and quiet, he doesn't think much of it, as Ally was often out with her friends or boyfriend, Hayden. However, when it got to be the next morning, and he still had not heard a word from his daughter, he began to panic, calling her cell multiple times only to get sent straight to voicemail. By lunch, he had gotten the police involved, filing a missing persons report, and he felt awful. This is his fault, if he had been closer to Ally and actually spent time with her then this wouldn't have happened. For the millionth time, he wished that you were here, because he was honest to God terrified and needed your comfort right now. Finally, at 10:08 PM, he got a call from an unknown number and picked up on the first ring. "Hello?" "...Daddy?" Relief courses through Zayn's veins at his daughters voice, although he is still slightly angry. "Ally, where the hell are you? I've the police looking--" he suddenly stops at the sound of Ally sobbing, and his anger quickly vanishes. "Ally, what's wrong? Where are you?" "Dad, I'm at some gas station next to the Super 8 motel a few towns over, you know? H-Hayden wanted me to run away with him because he told me it would help me deal with mum being gone and I said yes, because I'm tired of feeling like this, and you never comfort me anymore or anything, I felt like Hayden was the only one who cares about me." Zayn starts to interrupt, but Ally just continues. "B-but he doesn't, daddy, he brought me to this motel and tried to--tried to do stuff I didn't want to do, and when I refused, he got mad and hit me, and that's when I came here. I wanna come home, dad, I'm scared." Zayn's heart broke as he stood up and grabbed his keys, keeping his phone to his ear as he slips on his jacket. "It's alright, love, I'm on my way to get you right now. Does Hayden know you're there?" "I-I don't know, I don't think so, but he seemed pretty mad when I left, I'm scared he's gonna hurt me again, dad." Zayn's already in his car at this point, on his way to daughter. "Just stay on the phone with me, alright, Ally? I'll be there as soon as I can." His daughter hiccups on the other end, and Zayn continues talking to calm her down. "And for the record, I love you so so much Ally. I am so proud of everything you have done. I know I've been shit at showing it lately, but it's true, and I promise we'll fix our relationship. How about tomorrow, you and I go and see mum, yeah?"
  • Liam: "Dad, dad hurry up, it's almost starting!" Four year old Andrew said, tugging on Liam's pant leg. Liam doesn't look down at his son, too focused on his two month old daughter fussing in his arms. "Just a minute, Andy. Let me get your sister to sleep and then I'll be out to watch cartoons with you." Andy's face falls; Saturdays are usually Andy-Liam time, but ever since the baby came, he's had to learn to share you and Liam, an he wasn't used to it. "But Dad, Superman's already on TV!" This happens for ten more minutes before Liam finally gets frustrated with everything going on and snaps at the little boy. "I said in a minute, Andy! If you can't stay quiet until your sister gets to sleep then you won't be watching cartoons at all!" Andy's brown eyes fill with tears as he rushes out of the room, and Liam finally gets the baby to sleep a few minutes later. However, when he quietly closes her door and goes out to the living room, Andy is nowhere in sight-- and the front door is wide open. Liam's heart pounds as he rushes outside, contemplating what to do, not wanting to leave a tiny baby home alone, but still wanting to find his son. His eyes scan down the block, eventually spotting the small boy running down the sidewalk, towards the busy intersection. Liam sprints to catch up to him, shouting, "Andrew Joseph Payne! Do not take another step!" Andy freezes, his brown eyes widening. He's never been yelled at by his dad before. When Liam reaches him, he kneels to his level, a stern and angry expression on his face. "What were you thinking?! You know you're not supposed to leave the house without me or mummy, especially to cross the intersection!" Andy's bottom lip trembles , tears spilling down his cheeks. "D-daddy, you don't love me anymore. You forget about me all the time and you only love sissy now." Liam sighs, his expression softening as he brings the small boy into his arms. "Andy, you know that is not true at all. Sissy is just a little baby, she needs mine and mummy's help more than you right now. I love you so much, buddy." Andy wipes his eyes as Liam stands and begins making his way back home. "How much, daddy?" He asks, looking up at Liam hopefully. Liam laughs, moving Andy so he is sitting on his shoulders, just like he likes. "I love you to infinity and beyond, Andy."
  • Harry: The minute Harry steps through the front door after work, his fourteen year old daughter Paige rushes up to him, a frantic look on her face. "Dad, dad, I can't find Darcy anywhere, she's gone, I'm sorry-" An image of his four year old daughter Darcy pops up in his mind, worry creeping into his veins, but he knows he has to stay calm. "What do you mean, she's gone? What happened?" "Um, she was mad that I wouldn't play her princess game with her because I was right in the middle of putting Charlie down for his nap, and when I came out of his room, she was gone, I looked everywhere, even under all of the beds and in the cupboards." Harry sighs, closing his eyes as he rubs his temples, wondering why this had to happen on the one day Harry got home before you. "Alright, you stay here with Charlie and I'll go look outside," he tells Paige, and she nods, chewing her lip nervously. Harry turns around and exits the house, his mind working in overdrive. He tries to think of where he would go if he was an angry four year old, and it takes only a few minutes for Harry to figure out exactly where his daughter is. He makes his way over to the small, hidden fort he had built for Darcy a couple weeks and kneels down so he can knock lightly on the door. "Darc? You in there? It's daddy." A small sniffle is heard from inside before he door is swung open, a small body quickly flinging itself into Harry's arms. "Hiya, daddy!" Harry chuckles, kissing the top of her head before pulling back to look in her eyes. "Darc, you really scared Paige. She couldn't find you anywhere, she was very worried. Why didn't you tell her you were going to play out here?" Her tiny eyebrows furrow, a pout forming on her lips. "She told me not to bug her anymore or she'd tell Santa I was naughty." Harry laughed again, picking Darcy up as he stands and begins making his way back to the house. "Don't worry, Darc, Santa knows you were very good this year. Now, lets go apologize to your sister."
  • Preference Request are always welcome!(: