TalesFromRetail: It Doesn't Work...
I work at a local tool/hardware/lawn&garden store and I had a cranky customer come in today (like 20min before I’m writing this) who had a broken weed whacker. CG: cranky guy. Me: yours truly
CG: this doesn’t work anymore. *practically throws the weed whacked onto my counter
Me: ok I’d be happy to switch it out for you, I just have a couple questions about the broken one (standard procedure. We just fill out a slip with what’s wrong and send it to our in-house mechanic guy to be refurbished and sold at a cut rate. Nbd).
I bend down to grab a broken merchandise paper and by the time I stand back up the guy is gone. Vanished, but his broken (and dirty) weed eater is still on my counter. A little confused, but still trying to get through a line of a few people, I set his stuff aside since he’s gone and help the next customer. One of my coworkers shows up and is able to take the remaining customers as I go off looking for this guy. I find him as he is on his way from the weed eater shelf. He has another model and starts muttering something under his breath on the way to the counter. So I take his original receipt (kudos to him for having it in the first place) and start putting info into our computer to pull up his loyalty profile so we can process the return.
After that I start to fill out that repair slip from before
Me: so what happened to it?
CG: it doesn’t work.
Me: ok, what’s wrong with it?
CG: I used it for 3 hours and it stopped working! (CG getting noticeably more red in the face by the second)
Me: (trying to narrow down the problem) Ok, is there fuel in it?
CG: no. Or… yes. Maybe.
*I check, there is gas in the tank
Me: this is a 2-cycle engine. Did you mix the fuel and the oil together?
CG: no of course not! You don’t mix the oil and gas together, you moron! Where’s a manager?! I don’t need to talk to a f—tard like you. Get a manager!!!
Me: I am the floor supervisor (the MOD) and I’d love to help you out. Did you purchase the protection plan with this?
CG: *throws pamphlet at me Here. Now I want to switch it out for this one.
He produces the one he got from the shelf and I scan it. It rings up as a lower price than he bought the first one for.
CG: WHAT THE F—?! I bought it for 104.99 so they were trying to rip me off because the real price was 79.99!!! Come here and look at the sign!
*he grabs my shirt just below the collar and almost literally drags me to the display (at this point I was LIVID. You want to piss me off at work? Go ahead and lay your hands on me. I dare you.) I jerk myself free about halfway there.
He jabs a sign on the display and yells
CG: see? 79.99!!! They over charged me!
Me: (examining the sign) this is for a different product. The one you bought is here (for $104.99, coincidentally).
*CG storms back to the counter and still demands a refund.
Long story short, I try to explain to him that with the protection plan he purchased, he can get a. Ew one for free, but he just needs to call a number in the pamphlet. They then send him a new one. Simple, right? Well he demands that we do it and he basically throws a temper tantrum until we end up calling security to get him out of there.
All this because he didn’t mix the fuel with oil (40:1 ratio for 2-cycle engines in case you’re wondering) and because he didn’t want to use the service THAT HE PURCHASED.
You can’t make this crap up!