but i will always love the last part

i just want you to know that i’m not the easiest person to love. I have a massive part of me that is missing or broken from the last guy and i’m not gonna lie, it’s gonna take a long time to fix those up, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to try. I have to be honest to myself and to you and say that a part of me will always love my first love. A part of me is always going to want him, a part of me is always going to be sad and still have hope but every other piece, i want to be consumed by you. My first love has taught me so many lessons. So maybe i’m not going to fall as hard, maybe i’m not going to give in to an “i love you” as easily as i used too, maybe i’m going to have a bit of trouble learning how to trust again but i want to do that. The best part about a second love is it teaches you how to recover from the first, it shows you love when you thought all was gone to waste. I’m going to be difficult at times, I need attention, constantly. I love to be complimented and sometimes i need a reminder that i’m the only one, i love kisses and cuddles and sometimes i’m going to get mad, for no absolute reason except for the pure fact i want to see you get all frustrated and cute. I believe that all relationships have arguments and i am not afraid to have them, sometimes i’ll get sad whether there’s reasons or not and sometimes i need space, other times i need as much as love as you can give. Right now, I have more barriers than i ever have before but i’m okay enough to want to see where this goes. I’m not easy, but believe me, i’m worth it.

“She’s always so cheery with her endless questions you’d have no idea she’s so sad inside. She wears that mask well.”

She said, write for me….
Write anything
Write about when you pray for me.
How you ask God to help me make it through each day,
That every waking moment I become stronger in faith,
That this storm is almost over,
And this pain I feel won’t last always.

Write about my hurt and how it makes you feel.
How you would do anything
to give me a moment of serenity
and peace.
Be that breath of fresh air,
and that sense of tranquility while I sleep.

Write about how much you love me
That you accept me for all that I am, and not just the good parts.
And on the days when I have no strength left, you will battle my demons for me.
Tell me my flaws are the most beautiful pieces of me,
And when I break, you will take your time putting me back together.

Write about how powerful you think I am.
And how much you admire my resilience.
Tell me that the strength I posses is a testament to those who struggle with the same obstacles I’m forced to fight against.
Tell me I’m going to win…that I’ve already won.

—  jadore06

Steven Universe Valentine’s Day Cards Part 2!

Unlike last year’s cards, I decided to make cards for the newer gems we’ve met over the year rather than fusions since we had only met two new fusions and I really wanted to make more!

As always, these are free to use for you to send to the one’s you love! 💕

27 Dresses (Part 10)

Steve x Reader, Bucky x Reader AU

Summary – You are the epitome of “always a bridesmaid, never a bride.”  You think you know what love is, but sometimes you can’t see what’s right in front of you.  

Warnings – None

Word Count – 2,717

Notes –   I had a different plan in mind when I started writing this part, but somehow that’s not what ended up on the page.  I like where it went though.  Now I’m going to have to change up a few things to make this work out the way I want, but it’ll be worth it!  As always, please feel free to leave me comments or asks to let me know what you thought!

*Special thank you to the lovely ladies at the Avengers Trash Tower for allowing me to use them as my “brides!” Anika @avengerofyourheart, I saved you for last!!  I hope you enjoy your wedding and your groom!

*Special tag: @stories-from-stark-tower

Part 1  

Series Masterlist


Originally posted by vanillaa-ice


“You don’t have to yell at me, (Y/N),” she shot back at you.  “Dad gave me the dress, I can do whatever I want to with it.”

“That’s what you do, isn’t it?” you retorted.  “You take whatever is given to you and use it however you see fit without any regard for someone else’s feelings.”

“You’re overreacting,” your sister chastised you. “It’s just an ugly dress, you’ll get over it.”

“It was one of the only things we had left of Mom’s and you destroyed it!” you snapped as you clutched the box of scraps and stormed out of the shop.

You fumed the entire way home in the cab.  You were so sick and tired of Nat ruining everything you’d ever loved.  Maybe it was time you ruined something for her.


It was two days before you heard from Nat again.  You could tell that Steve knew what was going on from the way he acted around you. That was the worst part of this whole deal.  You and Steve had a great working relationship before all of this, regardless of the way he felt about you, or rather the way he didn’t feel about you.  Nat had come in and totally disrupted everything, and now you and Steve could barely have a conversation, even about work related topics.

She had decided to show up again with baked goods.  You had to hand it to her, she knew all of your weaknesses, especially when it came to your sweet tooth.  This time, it wasn’t just one slice of cheesecake, but an entire cheesecake. She knew she had screwed up big, and that it was going to be hard to earn your forgiveness this time.

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One of my favorite parts of Chopped is the walk of shame chefs have to do after they get chopped. It’s bad enough they were just eliminated from the competition, but now they have to walk alone down a hallway with a camera at the end of it while the audience watches them to struggle not to cry–not always successfully–and an optimistic voice over plays. Like, they’re already losers, but they have to suffer one last humiliation for the audience’s benefit before they can leave. It’s kind of evil, and I love it. The absolute worst is when it’s a worthy chef who shouldn’t have been chopped in the first place.

Wrong Loves My Company Finale

A/N: THIS IS 7000 WORDS LONG, WTH! Hi babes, I know this took far too long but it’s here now. I was actually crying earlier thinking about how this is the ending, the final chapter, the last part. Thus far this is my favorite fic I have written. I wanted to thank @writing-obrien for helping me soooo much with this series. She’s always there when I need to bounce around ideas or get motivated or just talk. She is my best friend and I love her and this series would be nothing without her. I also wanted to thank everyone that has read this and loved it! I’m so grateful for you ! I think that all I have to say so thank you so much, I love you so much okay? bye !

Warning: Uhhhhh it wouldn’t be an ending without some smut right? There’s also so alcohol use so yeah.

Word Count: 7867

Parts 1-6: [Here]

Originally posted by daily-obrien

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in honour of reaching 1.1k followers (which how?), i present — part two of this au & a fic from this verse, below the cut. thank you all so much for following me, i truly love every single one of you and it means so much that you like what i do here enough to follow me. enjoy <3 (there might be more coming as thanks too so keep your eyes open for that)

au: mama i’m in love with a criminal & this type of love isn’t rational  / part one.

she disappears from his life like smoke — pulls a job and disappears into the night. all he can do is add it to the list of times she’s chosen this life over him; the amount of times he’s come second, despite promising her everything he could possibly give her.

but mike knows without a doubt, it’s never the last time ginny will be in his life. she always comes back… unable to stay away from him; like magnets pulled together. this time; she brings her ex-boyfriend along for the ride, claiming he’s out to kill her for a job gone wrong six months ago… and mike? mike’s left with the question — help the love of his life or arrest her like he’s been ordered to do?

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On Love

My very first Viktuuri drabble yay!! Pure fluff to soothe my soul and hopefully yours ^^ Enjoy! (I tried to incorporate both Russian(thank you Soul!) and Japanese here because I find it’s an integral part of their relationship, feel free to correct me on any of it though it was pretty minor) Edit: thank you to homewriters and to Lili on Ao3 for the Russian correction!

“Yuu-ri!” Viktor called from the attic, pushing his way through the boxes, “Are you sure they’re up here?”

“That’s where you put them last year,” Yuuri called from the kitchen, before stuttering iie, iie, iie at Makkachin, because his Japanese always slipped out when scolding the poodle. Viktor giggled, picturing his darling Katsudon trying to keep the cookie dough away from their oversized dog.

Viktor definitely remembered putting the Christmas lights up in the attic at the beginning of January last year, but they’d accumulated so many boxes, and they were all just so brown, Viktor didn’t really know where to start.

He sighed, kneeling down against the first box he saw. He’d need to organize these better one day. Maybe after it stopped being so cold.

He pulled the box closer to himself, flipping open the side. No lights. Paper? What did they have paper for? Oh, not paper. Posters. Yuuri’s old trophies.

Viktor smiled. That was nostalgic. Some of his own were mixed in too.

He reached for another box, hoping to find more.

Nothing but his old costumes. The one Yuuri had worn for his Eros performance. Viktor held it up, admiring the sparkle from the black piece, wondering if he could convince Yuuri to wear it again. He’d gained a bit of weight since then (so had Viktor) but they were both still in relatively good shape, skating together on weekends and off days. The costume would be a little tight, but somehow that only excited the Russian further. A happy pink rose to his cheeks, the way it did after a few sips of vodka.

With childlike giddiness, he reached for the next box, popping it open and pulling out more posters. He pushed those aside, grabbing for the sets of trophies. Cute ones. Little ones. From so long ago that they had to be when Yuuri first started skating as a child. And he squealed in quiet glee at the sight of a few pictures, Yuuri probably around twelve or thirteen, cheeks red with cold and smile swelling with pride, holding up the medal around his neck.

Too cute.

“Viktoru!” Because Yuuri always added a ‘ru’ to the end of his name, “Did you find them?”

“Ah, almost!” Viktor quickly shoved the trophies back in the box, as if he’d been caught doing something bad. He grabbed for the pile of posters, which of course managed to all spill out of his hands, spreading out across the attic floor.

And Viktor stopped for a moment. Really looked at them.

All of them. Every single one, was of him. On the bottom corner of each poster, in handwriting that seemed to get sloppier as the Viktor in the posters got older, were dates. Or, at least, Viktor was almost sure they were dates. He knew that much kanji at least. But not enough to be overly confident about it. Especially when there were a few other things scribbled along the sides.

And then, between one of the many posters, was a picture of Yuuri, about seven or eight, and a poodle that was just about as big as he was.

He stared at it for a long time, seeing the happiness in his young lover’s eyes, squinting from smiling so hard, the poodle’s tail obviously wagging from the blur in the photo. Yuuri’s arms were wrapped around the dog in nothing but pure excitement.

Viktor continued to smile as he flipped the picture over, finding neat, even handwriting that didn’t match the ones on the posters.


And Viktor knew at least that much. Recognized his husband’s name, alongside his own. Knew that it was actually the poodle’s name, not his, but it almost felt like it was, like some strange wish that had been set on that day, fate placing the two names side by side. Maybe that’s why Viktor began to tear up. Or maybe it was out of frustration, because he couldn’t read what followed, didn’t recognize enough characters to.

These Japanese and their kanji.

Viktor wiped his face, putting it all away carefully, considered bringing down the posters to wave in his husband’s face, if only to see the blush that would follow.

Have you loved me for this long?

But that would be a ridiculous question. So he decided against it. Put the posters back. Kept the picture. Found the christmas lights easily after that, because they were in the box he’d labeled рождество last year, along with all the other decorations. He knew he’d done a bit of organizing.

“Did you find them?” Yuuri said, still stirring the dough with a wooden spoon, like an old-timey housewife, despite the fact that they owned the latest state-of-the-art mixer.

“Yup!” Viktor beamed, holding up the box, setting it down on the counter. Yuuri smiled in response, muttering some sort of sweet nothing to Makkachin in Japanese. It was too low, or too fast, or maybe both, for Viktor to catch.

“Lyubimiy,” he said, capturing Yuuri from behind, mindful of the bowl Yuuri still held. “Look what I found.” He held up the picture in front of their faces, Viktor pressing his cheek against his lover’s so that they could both see.


“You named your dog Viktor?” He grinned, “Was it after me?”

His husband set the bowl down and took the photo, admiring it with smiling eyes. “You were my inspiration for skating, back then.”

“Mmmm, only back then?” The Russian puffed his cheeks, “What about when I became your coach?”

Yuuri hesitated for a moment, giving a half, lopsided smile to the picture before setting it down on the counter, next to the bowl of dough. “When you were my coach, you stopped being my inspiration.” He cocked his head, so that their noses touched, blue eyes meeting brown. “You became my reason.”

It was now Viktor’s turn to hesitate, his eyes going wide, but then softening around the edges as they fluttered closed, placing a kiss on his husband’s cheek.

“You shouldn’t say things like that,” he warned, “I might just fall in love with you all over again.”

Yuuri smiled, turning his neck just a little bit more, so that this time, Viktor could kiss him on the lips. With bright eyes that shined behind his glasses, Yuuri gave a small giggle of a sound, the tops of his slightly chubby cheeks tinting with warmth, as he leaned in for another kiss. 

“Is that a promise?

And Viktor couldn’t help but smile, inhaling deeply and pushing his hair back, holding up his hands to catch Yuuri’s cheeks. “Mm,” he said, giving him another peck, “Promise.” 


*rises from the void with an unearthly scream*



I also ship Dazai and Atsushi a hella lot. I am in constant shipping hell with these two.

I was going through tumblr and there was this otp meme where one of the questions was “who wraps the other up in a duvet just to annoy them and who struggles to get out of it?”

Dazai. It will always be Dazai who does this Atsushi. Multiple times.

God, I love these two dorks.

I have one last part of this comic I’m still working on but I’ll post it later. Sorry @lunaxxre, I’ll be done with the last page soon. Hopefully.

I hope you guys like thissssss

*slinks back into the void*

Update: I made the last page~!

A Way to You Again: Part 5

Pairings: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: Angst

Word Count:  1119

Catch Up Here

Summary: Bucky and Y/N have been fairly successful at keeping their relationship hidden from the rest of the Avengers. That is… until Nat walks into the kitchen one night and finds Bucky kissing Y/N. While Y/N is relieved that their relationship is out in the open it soon becomes more complicated than she could have ever imagined.

Author’s Notes: Thanks to the lovely @melconnor2007 for the request. The last scene killed me. I always love hearing from you guys <3.

Sorry it’s out late – my nap turned into a mini hibernation.

Tags are at the bottom. Please let me know if you would like to be tagged/removed.

Originally posted by stupidteletubbie

Originally posted by scarlxtmaximoff

I felt like a hypocrite. As much as I had dreaded someone from the Avengers knocking on my door – I was finding myself wishing for it. I wanted Bucky to fight for me – I wanted him to prove me wrong. I needed him to. Days went by in a blur as I debated with myself on what I should do. Maybe he was still on his mission? Maybe Tony had told him to let me be? I couldn’t find an adequate excuse for it.

“Are you sure he won’t just show up at your door?” Nicole asked one morning – arching her eyebrows in curiosity.

“I’ve only ever talked to him about the cottage once… and it was just in passing,” I shrugged miserably.

“Well maybe he’s trying to get ahold of you? Have you checked your phone?” she asked casually.

“No – it’s been off since I got here,” I added miserably.

“Well maybe you should…”

“NO,” I snapped at her. As much as I wanted him to fabricate from thin air – I also really didn’t want to know why he hadn’t told me. I had made up my mind that I wouldn’t like his reasoning, and that was that.

I walked into the living room rubbing my eyes wearily. I had somehow managed to doze off as I snuggled in the oversized bed reading my dad’s beaten copy of Kurt Vonnegut’s “Slaughterhouse-Five.” I stretched my arms as I peered around the room – spotting Nicole on the couch in front of the fireplace. “Hey,” I muttered quietly. Her head immediately snapped in my direction as she quickly hid her hands. “What are you? OH NO. I told you no!” I roared as I went to snatch the phone from her hands. “Now they’ll know where I’m at! Dammit Nicole!” After a brief struggle I victoriously grabbed the phone from her hands and crossed my arms – huffing angrily.

“Ten missed calls, one  voicemail, and twenty text messages,” she stated as a fact.

“Huh?” I asked confused.

“Those are all from this Bucky guy. It seems like he might care,” she shrugged casually. I rolled my eyes annoyed and stomped back into the bedroom determined to hide there for the rest of the night.

As I curled up in the bed I couldn’t help, but feel like the phone I held in my hand felt like a lead weight. Should I go ahead and look? There was no way that Tony hadn’t locked onto where I was within fifteen minutes. Bucky, Tony, or Steve would be here in a matter of hours – so there was no point in holding out any longer… I needed to go ahead and face whatever he had to say so I could prepare myself. I reluctantly lifted the phone to my face – it was best to get the voicemail out of the way first. I clicked on the message before putting the phone on speaker and listened.

Bucky’s voice permeated the quiet of the room. My heart sank as I listened.

“Y/N… Tony said that you left a few days ago but wouldn’t tell him where you were going… I… I know something happened between you and Nat. Please call… please let me explain. I don’t… I don’t want to lose you over this. I… I’m sorry,” his voice was so incredibly sad that I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep myself from crying. When he paused at the end of the message my heart had done a backflip. I had never realized how much I wanted to hear him say that he loved me – but my hopes fell as flat as his voice as the recording ended.

I flipped through the the text messages quickly.

-Hey! I’m coming home – can’t wait to see your beautiful face.

-Steve just talked to Tony and he said you left???

-Is everything okay?

-I tried to call but it went straight to voicemail. Y/N please call me.

-Y/N, it’s not what you think. Please call me doll. Please come home. I miss you. I need to explain.

-I know I fucked it all up but please let me explain.

They kept going – each one a different variation of the one before it. I felt sick. It had been easier to accept everything when I had cut myself off from him. I sighed heavily. The truth was so glaringly obvious – I had never really accepted what had happened – just prolonged the inevitable. As I was flipping through the rest of the texts Bucky’s picture illuminated the screen. I froze in absolute panic – he was calling and I had accidentally just hit “answer.”

I stared at the phone – completely frozen in fear.

“Y/N,” Bucky’s voice said softly from the other end. I remained silent. I didn’t know what to do or what to say. It was as if I had suddenly turned into a statue. Bucky took my silence as a sign that I was going to listen and suddenly it was as if a flood gate had opened from his end of the conversation. “Doll, I am so sorry. I don’t know what all happened, but I know this is my fault. I swear I was going to tell you… I was going to explain everything, but I was just so afraid. So afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing and losing you… because you make me so happy. I haven’t… well I haven’t been this happy in a long time,” he paused for a moment waiting for my response. I sat in silence still unable to articulate the hundreds of conversations I had played out in my mind between us the last few days. “Doll…. Please. Please say something,” he pleaded – the edge of desperation cutting into his words.

All of my faculties seemed to have been taken over by some unknown part of myself that was unwilling to be hurt the way I had been hurt before. “There’s nothing left to say, Bucky…. Goodbye,” I said quietly before ending the call. I didn’t even know the words that were spilling out of my mouth until it was too late. I sat dumbfounded at myself as I stared at the phone in my hand. Why would I say that? What had I just done? Tears welled in my eyes as I realized that I could have very well ended everything then – he was trying and I had shut him down.

I jumped slightly as the door opened and Nicole came into the room. She looked at me apologetically as she held up two wine glasses and a bottle.

“I thought maybe we could use this tonight?”

I nodded sadly as tears streamed down my face.


@bless-my-demons @lillian-paige @pleasefixthepain @nikkitia7 @kittthekat @ailynalonso15 @themistsofmyavalon @coffeeismylife28 @melconnor2007 @harleyqueen7 @sebbys-girl @marvel-lucy @lbouvet @totallygroovyllama @stickthinbarbie @avengers-bucky-fanfic @buckybarnesbestbabe @irepeldirt @glitterintheairblog @mizzzpink @barnesandnoble13 @themercurialmadhatter @bringmetheemobands @theloveablesociopath @selfdestructivefangirl @bellenuit45 @moncun @smkunz613 @ephemeral-high @the-craziestone @zxcorra @awinterloveuniverse @thefandomplace @hellomissmabel @imamoose @dont-let-me-go-again @barnes-and-noble-girl @hollycornish @amrita31199 @ifoundlove-x0vanessa0x @skeletoresinthebasement @iron-winter @mikaelarhead @shliic @queenllamamama13 @jasmins3 @caitsymichelle13 @winterboobaer @mytasterpeculiar @bexboo616 @sgt-jbb-107 @sapphire1727 @seargantbcky @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @fiercemonaco @marvelouslyloki @kendallefire @lilasiannerd @alyssaj23 @harleenquim @masha-meow01 @simplyashley95 @beautifulbri26 @buckyappreciationsociety

Remember that time I made an Ereri fic like no other? It is a Titan Eren x Godzilla fic, and it’s called Weapons of Mass Dickstruction.

The fic’s summary is “His hands say murder, but his eyes say love”.

The fic is 13 words long, and the entire fic says: 

Nope. This is too fucked up, even for me. Sorry, can’t do it. 

That’s all fine and dandy…but the best part are the comments. I still get them from time to time, and they always make me laugh so. fucking. hard.

The last one kills me every time. 

I had one that was deleted once that said “Yep, Thomas. This is the low you hit. It’s a Wednesday. A Wednesday morning. And this is what you decided to read. You deserve everything this fic has to offer.”

Thoughts on RebelCaptain

So I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about Rogue One (hasn’t everyone?!?!?), specifically why the ending is so satisfying despite the heartbreak. I fully agree with everyone that is saying how Jyn and Cassian’s hug on the beach is beautiful and perfect because it represents the loss of potential while also still demonstrating the importance of always having hope. But I think it’s more than that. I think part of what makes that moment so satisfying to watch is that, ultimately, isn’t that how we all want to go? Knowing that we may not be remembered for long, but also knowing that you’ve done something great and meaningful with your life. And in our last moments we are not alone, but rather in the company of someone we love and who loves us in return. I wanted so badly for them to have more time together, but they did get to spend the rest of their lives together and in love, knowing that what they accomplished mattered. We didn’t get to hear the question “Are you with me.” and the answer “All the way.” We got to see it.

Originally posted by blackcanarydinah

All I Want for Christmas (Part 5/5)

Bucky x Reader AU

Summary – You’ve put your career ahead of everything else in life. Then you meet a guy that makes you want to believe in love again, but he’s not interested in you.  What happens when Fate decides you deserve a second chance?  

Warnings – Lots of Christmas fluff!

Word Count – 3,297

Notes –   Today is Christmas Eve!  I hope you guys have enjoyed the story so far.  This is the last part, do you think she’s finally going to get it right? Let’s hope so!  As always, please feel free to leave me comments or asks to let me know what you thought!

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5


Christmas Fic Masterlist

Originally posted by christmas-winter



I don’t want a lot for Christmas
This is all I’m asking for
I just wanna see my baby
Standing right outside my door

I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is you

All I want for Christmas is you, baby

When the alarm went off, you decided that today was going to be the day. Somehow you were going to get it right.  You sang along with the end of the song as you made your bed.


You grabbed your phone and shot Tony a quick text, telling him that you were taking the day off, as you made your way to the bathroom.

“That’s perfect!” Tony replied after a few minutes. “I’m at a ski resort with Pepper. She came back!  Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas to both of you!”

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even though ouat has a lot of problems and makes me pretty angry sometimes i still love it and i always get this tightness in my chest when i think of it ending. this show has been such a big part of my life for the last 6 years and it helped me go through so much. i’m not ready to let it go.