but i understand how you can't

anonymous asked:

omg give it up. The ONLY person who thinks about fucking Darren is YOU & kids who can't comprehend boundaries. The rest of us ADULTS understand how this works. We don't have any investment in who he is or isn't sleeping with. Those of us who understand boundaries let Darren live however he wants. YOU are inappropriately & childishly obsessed with where his penis goes. Celebs hire security for ppl like you. Darren is just like you-what happens outside of work is not relevant to his-or your-job.

I missed you my friend. I’m not blocking you because you always give me the best laughs. Well, if i had a d**  and the opportunity of a total consensual relationship with him i would probably give to the thing a though…also in C’s case, you know that they are two gorgeous man. But sadly for you i don’t need this kind of fantasies to support artists like them and i respect their real relationship.

Said that, you call yourself an adult but you decided to come to my ask and harassing me.

I don’t really care where his penis goes at the end of the day or during the day or whenever. I’m here on my blog, minding my own business and supporting my favorite actors. So, take my advice: go out and live your life the fullest, because i can’t care a flying f* about what you have to say. Do you wanna believe in what it’s only fake pr? Be my guest.

anonymous asked:

Pennywise didn't even kill a gay man, homophobes attacked him without being under Penny's influence and then Penny ate him. That's what he does. He eats people. It don't matter if theyre gay or not lol. What you want him to do, say "oh no this free meal is a gay dude I can't eat him bc thatd be Extra problematic :o(" I'm a gay dude and the gay penny jokes are funny who cares. I love gay villains and monsters

WHAT I WANT IS FOR IDIOTS LIKE YOU TO STOP LITERALLY TAKING THE OLDEST FUCKING HOMOPHOBIC TRICKS IN THE BOOK AND PLAY IT OFF AS CUTE HOW FUCKING HARD IS THIS TO UNDERSTAND YOU ABSOLUTE MORONS

the worst thing about adhd is when you’re staring at instructions or hearing them and everybody else is understanding them but your brain just. doesn’t get it.

and you can understand each word individually but if you try to put them together it’s like trying to read a language you don’t understand

aceofalmonds  asked:

Hello! I read (and enjoyed!) the story you posted of your grandpa and his tree disposal methods, and so was looking for the story you mentioned of your other grandpa menacing a peach tree with a baseball bat, but can't seem to find it. Halp?

That would be because I haven’t posted it yet!  Many people have requested the story mentioned in the tags “Grandpa Menaces a Peach Tree With A Baseball Bat”, So here it is, with a side of “Grandpa Menaces The Iowa Relatives With Giant Corn”

**

For the Full Context of this tale, you have to understand how my dad’s side of the family got to America in the first place.  Prior to 1917, they were all farmers of limited success that migrated from county to county, trying not to starve, until a covey of the Fitzpatricks heard that they could be shoveling shit in Grand Americay, far away from the people they owed money to, so they all fucked off to Iowa and somehow made a fortune in the real-estate business in the middle of the depression.  Despite now being comfortably middle-class, they never actually gave up farming, and having a pair of glowing green thumbs was a point of pride in the family.

So, when Grandpa moved out to California, specifically to the Salinas Valley, which is where an absurd percentage of the country’s food is grown because it’s full of probably the world’s most stupidly good soil,  Grandpa had to continue the tradition and set up a garden in the backyard, planted various crops and flowers in January because fuck you this is coastal California, I can start stuff in the middle of winter, and invited his sister Leone and her growing brood of (at the time, 5, later 9 children) out to visit.

They came out in July, to escape the Midwest humidity and Butter fetish for a time, when the corn is typically getting to be around knee-height if things are going well.  Grandpa spent a long time asking how things were back on the farm, plying them with ice tea and grandma’s lethal Angel Food cake, before politely inviting Leone and her Husband Scotty out back to see how his patch was doing, oh its not much really, just a bit of fun for me and the children-

Scotty and Leone stared at the nine-foot-tall goddamn corn which was already setting fruit because it had been going since January.  At the watermelon plant that had taken over the side-yard, and at the other oversize and thriving crops that had taken over grandpa’s yard.  There was a few moments of awed silence.

“Well fuck you Edwin.” Scotty eventually said, before Leone whopped him over the head and the rest of the visit was a pleasant diversion.

the following spring though, Grandpa received a package from Iowa, specifically a small peach tree with a note saying “With Love, Scotty.”

Leone knew better than to engage in such shenanigans, because this is irish-agrarian passive-aggressive Bullshittery at its absolute finest.  “Sure, yeah, you can do corn.  Any asshole can do corn.  TRY THIS FUSSY-ASS PEACH VARIETAL INSTEAD, YOU ASS”  is perhaps a more accurate translation.

Grandpa, not about to be intimidated by a mere tree, planted that sucker in the front yard and proceeded to pamper it- bone meal fertilizer, a brand-new irrigation system, the works.  Hell, he would go out some times and talk to the darn thing.  It flowered, and he borrowed a behive from one of the local farmers to make DARN SURE that it got pollinated, because he was going to mail peaches to Scotty for Christmas, that asshole.

The tree. Did not. fruit.

That fall, grandpa reccived a letter from Scotty, asking after a couple paragraphs of circumlocutions, how that tree he sent was doing?

Grandpa got up, made himself a martini, picked up Dad’s baseball bat, and walked out to the front yard to have a discussion with the Peach tree.  

“I’ve just received a letter.”  he explained, waving the paper at the tree. “Asking when you’re going to fruit.  Now, I think I’ve held up my responsibilities to you as your caretaker, so it’s time for you to start providing.  Do you understand?  This spring, you better start fruiting or I will personally take this bat to you and turn you to into kindling.”

He stepped close to the tree, sticking his face in the branches as though whispering into it’s hypothetical ear. “Do not test me, you little shit.”

The next week, the tree bloomed out of season, and by February, it had set an obscene amount of fruit, which grandpa gleefully turned into preserves and mailed back to Iowa.

I know people talk about Aries moons like they’re explosive and angry children, but honestly I think they’re one of the most vulnerable moon signs. I think they are truly just sensitive and have trouble dealing with that sensitivity. I think what Aries moons need is someone to protect them a little. They will absolutely NEVER accept protection if you’re obvious about it and coddle them, but I think they do need a helping hand when it comes to dealing with the rawness of their emotions.

thats-it-im-going-incognito  asked:

Hello, dear <3 Simply for scientific research, why do you think Jiminie is as graceful as a baby giraffe when he walks or stands or sits, but suddenly he's smooth like a snake when dancing (most of the time anyways)?

When I will understand why he smiles like the warmest weather

Originally posted by waejin

then looks at you and it turns into thunder

Originally posted by fyeahbangtaned

When I will understand how he gets embarrassed for the smallest things 

Originally posted by fyeahbangtaned

then manage his hip thrusting like he was part of Magic Mike

Originally posted by jiminsjiminie

When I will understand how can he be the shortest in BTS

Originally posted by coffee-joonie

then jumps the highest

Originally posted by yoonmin

When I will understand how he gets shy when someone looks at him 

Originally posted by aestheticvbts

Then stares at someone for minutes like he is willing to consume all their soul

Originally posted by moonlarents

When I will understand how much bullying he does not respond to 

Originally posted by namjoonholic

then out of the blue become the most savage of the team

Originally posted by jitonic

When I will understand how he ATTAC

Originally posted by ofhairandthighs

then PROTEC

Originally posted by jikookiejar

When I will understand some of these I will make sure to answer you by then ^^

After your first date with Damien
  • Lucien: *walks in to see Damien writing a letter with a quill and ink set* "What are you doing?"
  • Damien: "I'm writing a letter, of course. I had a great time having tea with our neighbor, so I thought I'd let him know."
  • Lucien: "...Dad, just send an email or a message on Dadbook."
  • Damien: "What? You know I can't do that, Lucien."
  • Lucien: "Dad, you work in IT. It's not like you don't know how to use the internet!"
  • Damien: "But Lucien! The aesthetic! Surely, you understand!"
  • Lucien: "I...you make a good point, Dad..."
DEH x Thing I've Heard In Improv
  • Evan Hansen: I've been standing here under this tree the whole time. You just never noticed.
  • Connor Murphy: I can't, I'm high off Elmer's White Glue™.
  • Jared Kleinman: Well that seems like you're more than "just bros".
  • Alana Beck: Boys Don't Understand the importance of presidential rule and nail polish.
  • Zoe Murphy: My brother just died. Flirt with me after the funeral. Show some respect.
  • Heidi Hansen: I can't believe you're cheating on me with another set of parents. My own son!
  • Cynthia Murphy: *loud sobbing noises* I'm not crying, I got emotions in my eyes.
  • Larry Murphy: Oh? Our kid died? How did I not notice that
8

You truly scare me. I just want to let you know that.

  • sai: I still don't understand your bond with sasuke
  • naruto: this again?
  • naruto: look, it's simple
  • naruto: basically, he's my best friend, and the first person to really accept me for myself
  • naruto: we're also rivals because I've always wanted to be his equal, but he made me feel inferior, that bastard
  • naruto: I admire his determination, skills, strength, and the hidden kindness in his heart
  • naruto: I like the way his skin glows like the moon, the way his eyes are so clear and black, I can see my own reflection if I lean in close enough
  • naruto: his lips feel like velvet and taste sour, but also a little sweet
  • naruto: like tomatoes, I guess... huh...
  • sai: and how do you know what his lips taste like?
  • naruto: oh yeah, we kissed a few times
  • naruto: it was mostly on accident
  • sai: but you say you're friends?
  • naruto: no, no, we're more than just friends
  • sai: I see... that makes more sense
  • naruto: yeah, he's like a brother to me
  • naruto: a really infuriating, good-looking older brother
  • sai: I'm confused again
  • sai: so you're not in love with him?
  • naruto: don't be ridiculous- I just told you he's like a brother to me
  • naruto: you can't be in love with your brother
  • naruto: no matter how good-looking he is
  • naruto: that's weird
  • sai: and the rest of this is normal?
  • naruto: um... yeah
  • sai: I understand now
  • naruto: you do?
  • sai: yes, if I was sasuke, I would want to kill you too
  • naruto: sai, we have to work on your people skills

anonymous asked:

Ummmm like yeah I know this is hella strange but... What do you think about Evil!Deku Au?? I know this kind of thing is absolutely not about fandom precious bun but just imagine yourself: Deku didn't meet All Might and at one moment he just tired of all this shit. Like, you know, at one day he have finally understand that you can't be hero without a quirk and he can't enroll in YA because hE JuST DOn't HAVe FreaCKING quirk but there is no such think as villain academy and he is like: 'why not??'

OH MANG;;; First off WARNING: LONG POST!

This is a rly good au, I’m a sucker for angst///;;; This makes me realize how strong a character Deku really is. Seriously, reality is a harsh world and just seeing Deku face so many rejection from so many people, even with his own mom AND All might at one point… its just so sad and man the sucker still goes forward, headstrong, I really applaud Deku for having such a strong character trait. Now, I’m honestly a bit of a sadist so let’s just say he DID meet All might, but the response was totally different….

I feel this would really develop quite well! I tried to creat3 Deku’s villian outfit;;; I rly love steampunk so you can guess where the goggles came from lol It’s more of a casual look and just covering his identity and such so yah;;; I noticed most villians’ outfits are like dat o<-<

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