but i know the feelings and god she's acting like such a shit

the main difference between male and female

Aries: a female aries is lovely and charming, she has a spark to her that makes her determined to accomplish what she sets her mind to. She’s extremely erotic and open about her sexuality.

a male aries is very serious at first glance, almost shy but once they feel comfortable around you they get all weird with their drugs and anime fetiches

Taurus: a female taurus is down to earth, she appears to be quiet and softspoken but omg this girl has the craziest things going through her brain, and she will always to be hungry, is not always expressive about emotions but she gives the best gifts and hugs.

A male taurus is always really fucking strange, he’s super quirky, a gamer, addicted to game of thrones and always uses cartoon references. Funny sense of humour (borderline offensive) says love isn’t his thing, is the first one to fall.

Gemini: a gemini male almost always seems to be super attractive, either bc he’s the cute nerdy type, or the popular hot guy. really smart, likes to laugh a lot. Can be a real douche 

a female gemini is adorable and always in the mood to goof around, so freaking versatile, if she feels betrayed will spill out all ur secrets and call u out on everything bitch watch out

Cancer: cancer boys are huge babies, they are party guys, it’s all about fun and games until someone mentions ‘’love’’ and they will sit u down and ramble about what their perfect girl would be like. is always waiting on the ‘’one’’, has high af expectations but likes the simplest and most boring girls.

cancer girls are moms, they always hug you, but omg these women are so jealous with their friends, it’s like you can’t even co-exist in a room with their bestie bc they will give u the stinky eye, i can’t

Leo: leo girls are the funniest ever, end of story. they’re divas and vulgar ass men at the same time. Fashion on fleek, always looks high but it’s just their face. belongs in the 70′s.

male leos are friends with everyone, most popular guy ever, nice, likes to act all mean but it’s all playful. has a hard time settling down, deep down always wants more in a girl

Virgo: virgo women are fierce, they are softies on the inside although they always look anxious  on the outside, stressed 24/7, loves sex so much low-key addicted to it, organized but a big ass mess

virgo guys are intelectual but stubborn mofos, say a lot of dad jokes, god complex, act like they don’t know shit about trends but really loves buying clothes and dressing nice.

Libra: libra boys are guys who look like angels, so friendly and innocent, BUT BAM BITCH they hit you with their sass, they are flirty af but SO FUCKING OPINIONATED, will flat out say ‘’i don’t like girls who ____’’, expects for you to chase after them, they are actually explosive and get moody easily, really dirty jokes

libra girls are airheads, so nice and giggle all the damn time (it’s cute srry if i sound mad), they always laugh at what ur saying even if it’s dumb and not funny at all. always has a young face, most likely not very open about sexuality, modest, easily corrupted, ——–if u have a scorpio moon u are the devil regina george— :)

Scorpio: scorpio guys are psycho, 60% are sociopaths i swear, they never laugh but when they do it’s loud and crazy and no one knows why the fuck. always walk like they’re in a hurry, STARES, is a child 4ever

scorpio women are extreme, she will not shut up for hours and the next day will not speak at all. is sexual but probably a virgin, knows everyones secrets, jealous with friends, jealous with stranger guys, jealous with mom, jealous with pet, jealous with self. stalks crush and writes poems about him but will never admit it

Sagittarius: sag guys are soooooo cheesy romantic, i swear they’re the fourth water sign, literally so many emotions, likes art, falls in love so easily it’s ridiculous, IS ALWAYS FRIENDZONED OMg hilarious but with partner, lasts 4ever

Sag girls are the ones who friendzone, will forget ur name in a second, flakey, says she’s down to go out with friends and guess what, bish fell asleep.loves to gossip with u, will always wanna hook u up with her friends or find out details about ur crush. does the dirty work for everyone

Capricorn:  cap girls are outspoken, bitchy but if she likes you she will defend u till death (she’s still gonna be a bitch to u but a softer one), confident AF, always looks ready to go to a club, boys everywhere like girl where’d u get these bruhs from. everywhere you go, guys will flock them, will make u feel like a potato bc she’s so perfect. has a hard time making decisions and letting go

cap male is competitive, ambitious, smells gooooood, style on fleek, the funniest guy ever, dark humour, smart with money, is probably gonna be a CEO, mommy’s boy, loves whiskey idk, eats SO MUCH like more than anyone, is a puppy on the inside, fuckboy but diehard romantic deep down.

Aquarius: aquarius guys always look cool, bad boy, they look like they dont care (spoiler alert: they don’t) has like 219 ex girlfriends and another hundred friends with benefits, smart ass, feels superior to everyone, thinks he’s so deep, he probably is but can never show it so no one believes him.

 aqua girls are always popular, the quirky one, the one who likes things ‘’no one else likes’’, a huge hipster, simple but attractive, has so many guys who wanna be with her and she acts like she doesn’t even notice. has so many guy friends (theyallwannabangher but ok) probably artsy, has good taste in music

Pisces: pisces men walk so fucking fast, probably because of their fucking long ass legs, has a serious face almost like he’s analizing the situation but in reality they’re thinking about memes (has amazing memes), never follows his heart, has strong feelings but rarely ever acts on them. is in love with someone they dont know, always has that little shine in their eyes

pisces girls are always the cute girl, the baby, the good one. deep down these girls will say dirty shit and has that evil side that always wants to come out and play, easily makes friends, is a disney princess and loves warm things. 

Stuff My Mom Has Told Me During Hamilton (Act 1)
  • Hamilton: "Why do they start out with the end? Spoilers!"
  • Aaron Burr, Sir: "How is telling someone you stalked and punched them a sure way to make friends?"
  • "Mom..."
  • "Who's the random French dude?"
  • "Lafayette."
  • "Where did he come from?"
  • "France, mom."
  • "Is this man having sex with horses?"
  • My Shot: "Didn't that guy sing this on Jimmy? The lyrics were different..."
  • The Story of Tonight: "I would not have told you about nights like that..."
  • The Schuyler Sisters: "That poor Peggy...she sounds adorable."
  • Farmer Refuted: "I have no clue what's being said..."
  • You'll Be Back: "Does this apply to what's going on now?"
  • Right Hand Man: "BURR JUST GOT REJECTED!"
  • A Winter's Ball: "With the ladies? Didn't you say he liked John?"
  • Helpless: "Girl this is gonna end bad for you..."
  • Satisfied: "How do you forget your name then - BAM! - now you remember?"
  • TSOT (Reprise): "They're cute when they're drunk."
  • Wait For It: "Wait - is everyone having an affair? You said Alex does right?"
  • "Mom just listen..."
  • "What does this have to do about Georgia?"
  • Stay Alive: "Did they eat horses asses?!"
  • Ten Duel Commandments: "How is General Lee here? Why do they hate him?"
  • "That's Charles Lee...you're thinking of Robert E. Lee."
  • "Oh."
  • Meet Me Inside: "Alexander you gonna get grounded!"
  • That Would Be Enough: "A little Hamilton sounds like a bad idea..."
  • Guns and Ships: "Damn he's fast."
  • History Has Its Eyes on You: "That's some deep shit..."
  • Battle of Yorktown: "I LIKE THIS ONE!"
  • "Mom please - "
  • "THEY WON!"
  • "I know they did mom."
  • What Comes Next: "Wait did he - oh my God. 'Awesome. Wow.' That's how I feel when your father talks about sports."
  • Dear Theodosia: "That's an awful name..."
  • "Mom!"
  • John Laurens Interlude (i had to): "Wait...what?"
  • Non-Stop: "How do you go from something so sad to this?! What the hell?!"
things you should know about kaz brekker
  • his real name is kaz rietveld but he changed it to brekker when he saw this on a piece of machinery because he thought it sounds badass
  • he broke his leg but instead of letting it heal properly he was like “ah whatever” and then he got himself a cane with which he could probably smash skulls of his enemies
  • at 14 he had a crush on a girl named imogen but he would punch anyone who would dare to say that kaz brekker ever had Feelings™
  • he also had a brother, jordie, but he died
  • so kaz spent god knows how long plotting the Perfect Revenge and it was so good that the man who conned his brother didn’t even know what hit him, pekka was done did dead (not actually but y’know)
  • encourages rumors that he may be an actual demon (i mean im sure matthias wanted to exorcise the demjin at one point tbh)
  • probably started the rumor by disguising himself as someone else and telling people scary (and obviously made up) stories about THE kaz brekker because he’s Extra
  • he dresses in suits because he’s totally Not a thief, he’s a Businessman
  • he hates skin to skin contact which is why he always wears gloves
  • but he doesn’t mind taking them off around inej (or taking his shirt off and cleaning himself in front of her if we’re at this point)
  • he’s really good at maths (he probably threatened some poor soul into tutoring him but in a way that no one would know he actually needed tutoring because he’s THE kaz brekker and he was born smart)
  • practices magic so he can cheat even more
  • the boy would single-handedly break into fort knox
  • he would do literally anything for 30 million kruge (selling his soul included [he probably already did that tho])
  • i’m pretty sure kaz thinks he doesn’t need oxygen as long as he has the money
  • owns like 89 fancy hats
  • treats jesper like his brother and calls him “jes” because jesper’s father did that
  • says he only keeps wylan as a bait but at one point he adopts him even if he doesn’t know this
  • probably writes poems about inej’s laugh
  • goes batshit crazy after inej is injured, tortures and throws a guy who hurt her to the sea but then doesn’t speak to inej for 2 days
  • and when he finally does it’s to discuss money, Romantic™
  • man he loves inej so much but he suppresses the hell out of this
  • he’s obsessed with crows; he has a crow tattoo, he feeds crows, he knows everything about them, he probably talks to them like they’re his kids
  • he’s Not Bothered™ but then he says shit like “i’d crawl to you” or “she was lovely and brave and better than anything he deserved”
  • he’s a big softie for inej
  • honestly he acts like he doesn’t care but he would probably die for inej, nina and jesper
  • but also he’s an asshole and a control freak and he doesn’t even deny that
  • jesper probably shouts “you put cute in execute” whenever kaz kills someone
  • he never smiles
  • and he certainly Did Not Smile when he saw inej, wylan and jesper coming to his rescue in a freaking tank
  • (he did)

episode one :: Yuuri Katsuki is the most beautiful disaster that Victor has ever met in his entire life, and Victor has built his empire on beautiful disasters.



Victor isn’t sure he knows what he’s doing anymore by the time casting rolls around for season 22 of The Bachelor.  Okay, he knows what he’s doing, but it’s all autopilot.  He’s got a dossier of Chip Vanderbones and Tad Hardbeefs to look at, but is almost resigned enough to just give into Lilia and Yakov’s suggestion to cast Georgi Popovich, notorious histrionic Bachelorette season 10 runner-up, as this season’s lead out of sheer notgivingafuckness.  At this point Victor isn’t even sure whether he really wants to be in this game at all anymore, but what the hell else he would do besides sleep for a thousand years if he retired before thirty?  

And then Phichit Chulanont comes into his office to distract him during a conference call with Yakov to tell him a story about his friend who just crashed and burned at the Figure Skating Grand Prix Finals, and everything click click clicks into place: redemption narrative.  Twenty young men are going for the gold, but only one can win the heart of Yuuri Katsuki– he can hear the promos, see the character arcs unfold, and the narratives rush through him like they’ve always lived inside him and it feels–exciting.  

“Phichit,” Victor says suddenly, interrupting Phichit and grabbing him from across his desk.  “We have to get him.  He’s our next bachelor.”

“Oh my God,” Phichit replies, eyes widening, and then again, “Oh my God.

“Do you think you could get him?” Victor asks.  He’s seeing figure skating dates, thematic destination shoots in Chile and Finland and Iceland, “The Bachelor: Love on Ice” title screen flashing over two champagne glasses on the lip of an outdoor hot tub.  

“Do I think I can get him,” Phichit repeats dismissively, looking the closest to offended that Victor has ever seen him.  “What do you think you hired me for, Nikiforov.”

Keep reading

i found this post in my drafts and have ZERO memory of writing it (thank u alcohol) so im gonna put it in my queue lol
  • ok but imagine 
  • Bitty comes out to his parents but he doesn’t tell them about Jack, thinks it’s for the best, maybe to ease his parents into things or maybe to keep the pool of People Who Know as small as possible 
  • and like yeah Ransom and Holster are super oblivious but Suzanne Bittle is not, not when it comes to her son, because she is a certified Nosy Southern Mother and she can see he’s been acting differently, happier but quieter, always on his phone and blushing when she asks about boys
  • and he talks about the team a LOT 
  • Jack’s one of his best friends and he’s just started his NHL career, so of course Bitty’s never gonna shut up about Jack
  • (Same goes for Shitty and law school. And eventually Ransom and med school. Dicky is proud of his friends and wants everyone to know. He gets that trait from Suzanne, she understands)
  • but he keeps talking about this one Boy, how sweet he is and how his smile is like a sack of puppies and how bitty’s always making this boy do things with him like baking and getting froyo and going shopping and Suzanne is like. Yes. This must be Dicky’s secret boyfriend. 
  •  the next family weekend or whatever, Suzanne demands to meet this Chowder boy who’s stolen Bitty’s heart
  • Bitty is both confused and mortified

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I'm very sick. Can I have some sick paladin headcanons pretty please?

hunk:

  • he’ll give everyone the play by play of how he’s feeling as the illness progresses
    • no concept of tmi
    • “okay so i just went to the bathroom and there are some things going on in my intestines right now that-” “oh my god hunk shut up”
  • gets really freaked out at first because “what if this is a weird alien virus that makes my lungs explode or something!”
    • but don’t worry! coran comforts him with Science!
    • sorta!
    • “there is a 75% chance your body will be able to combat the disease no problem!” “what about the other 25%” “you could die quite horribly! haha!”
  • catch him in the kitchen with a 102 fever trying to make himself soup
    • listen. he loves his friends. but. he has very high standards for caretaking and none of them come close to meeting them

pidge:

  • gets pretty visibly sick so everyone knows when she’s sick without her having to say anything
  • interact with humans? haha no thanks
    • hates being around people when she’s sick because everything they do pisses her off lmao
    • she’d rather just hole herself up in her room with her laptop
    • don’t talk to her until it’s over
  • at any given moment you go to check on her she’s probably laying face down on her bed and groaning miserably
    • even on the lowest screen brightness her laptop is still giving her a headache
    • betrayed by the one she loves most :’’’(

lance:

  • he’ll tell everyone when he’s sick. like. he’ll announce it
  • he’s… dramatic
    • “i’m sorry princess i can’t train today i sneezed earlier and am probably dying”
    • if he coughs once he’s like “this is it. this is where it all ends”
  • [draping himself on couch] “everyone take care of me i’m dying”
  • you know it’s serious when he shuts up
    • when he’s really sick he sorta just lies down and does nothing
    • but he’s not like pidge, he wants people around
    • so he’ll go to the bridge and sit and listen to everyone doing stuff and just doze there (and get the couch all germy ew lance-)

keith:

  • won’t tell anyone he’s sick but everyone can tell
    • always vastly underestimates how bad it is, so he never feels the need to mention it
    • it’s just a cold shiro?? yes i can walk in a straight line here i’ll prove-
    • keith, in an on-fire house: “this is fine”
  • galra have higher body temperatures than humans which scares the shit out of everyone the first time keith runs a fever
  • no concept of what a sick person is supposed to act like
    • unless it’s really bad he’ll just try to go about his daily routine
    • but everyone keeps running into him and sending him back to his room >:/
  • he actually likes the peace and quiet that comes with being sick though, so it’s not all bad

shiro:

  • he’ll tell everyone he’s sick because Communication is Important Guys
    • but he sort of? doesn’t act sick??
    • so it’s confusing for everyone around him
    • “hey just a heads up i have a fever today” [kicks ass in training, strategizes with allura, forms voltron to save a planet]
  • basically he plays it off well
    • so he tends to get worse because he’s not taking medicine or resting
  • tied with keith for Most Likely to Collapse From A Fever Due to Stubbornness 
  • actually one of the worst patients out of the paladins
    • he goes a little stir crazy, doesn’t really like sitting still and letting other people handle things
    • “shiro go to sleep we can survive one day without you oh my god-”
⇁ nudes, not flowers | 01

Originally posted by bangtannoonas

pairing⇀Hoseok x reader x Jungkook

genre⇀smut || fuckboi!au

warnings⇀public sex, slight voyeurism/exhibitionism, dirty talk, dom!junghope, demeaning names during sex if you aren’t into that, jealousy

word count⇀5.5k

You’re not supposed to fall for Jung Hoseok and his repertoire of awful pick-up lines—but you do. The problem is: he’s afraid of commitment, and bolts at the idea of settling down. After that, you decide to stay far away from fuckboys, but his friend decides to test your new found resolutions.

or : Jungkook wants to see how far he can push Hoseok until he snaps 

⇁  01 | 02

Keep reading

Batfamily NSFW headcanons

Well, here it is. Because of the nature of the questions, IT IS NSFW, so if you’re uncomfortable with that, do not read, I have PLENTY of other work that aren’t NSFW at all that you can check ;-) (right here, my masterlist blog : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com). Anyway, I’m not great at writing headcanons so thought I practice a bit…hope you’ll still like it :

_________________________________________________

The Goodies-

Bruce Wayne

  • What turns them on?

✶When you touch him inappropriately in public. Especially at charities, galas and other balls. It drives him crazy the way you do it so sneakily so that no one but him notice. It’s a sure way to convince him to go home earlier. 
✶Seeing you putting someone in their place with your wits and sarcasms after they’ve been rude to you…Oh he lives for this, and will have trouble to concentrate on anything else but wanting you. 
✶Your smile. Your laugh. The way you light up his dark World.
✶That man has a thing with lifting your skirt slowly, and putting your panties aside. He couldn’t even tell you why, he just loves it. And obviously, it instantly turns him on when you let him.
✶Knowing that the emotions he feels for you can outlast the orgasm you both had. Oh yes. Knowing he’s loved, and can let go with you. 

  • What turns them off?

There is very few things that turns him off when he’s with you, if not nothing (like literally, even when you’re being annoying, or when he’s being an ass, or if you just woke up and are disheveled and not really attractive…he’d still want you), as everything you do is just…Wow. He can’t get enough of you. Everything you do turns him on really. But He had experiences with other women before… :
✶Women who couldn’t handle a simple conversation. No connection at all with them, just sex. In and out, and then they’d be gone. He hated that. Which makes him love you more when you just spent time in each others arms talking about anything and everything. You’re the only one that makes him want to talk about what he feels and such…It’s a big relief. You’re his big relief. 
✶He use to hate SO MUCH when he took a woman out that had a “fake hollywood accent”, or any fake accent. A lot of fake French one. They thought it made them more interesting, but the only thing it did, was making them super annoying to hear so…Yeah, massive turn off. He cringed more than once because of a high pitched voice, or an annoying one with a stupid fake accent.
✶Narcissism turned him off instantly. Oh the many women Alfred had to escort out because Bruce misjudge them…It happened to him a lot when he was younger, long before meeting you. He thought he’d find a kindred spirit, but turned out, it would just be a woman who wanted him for his money and fame, and who thought she was irresistible. Spoiler : those kind of women were rarely irresistible, to him at least. He could resist them very well. He could resist most women very well…But you. Oh you, it’s impossible. 
✶Lack of passion. He just cannot even think about dating someone who isn’t passionate about anything. 
✶Fake tits. That doesn’t even remotely look (or feel) natural. Fuck them. And oh the women he went out as a younger man had a lot of fake things physically (fake ass, tits, teeth, nose…), every thing was fake in them really, to their personality and smiles. He hated that with a passion, and often wished he could drop the “womanizer” and “playboy” persona, that wasn’t like his real him at all…Everything changed when you came in. You’re the best thing that ever happened to him, nothing fake about you (for real though, if you wanna tell him to fuck off because he’s being an asshole, they you’ll do so, and he loves that!). 

  • Kinks?

Nearly violent sex. Bitey, grabby, pinny, not-holding-back sex. Paired with sweet words of encouragement and gentle forehead/Cheek kisses.
✶Surprise sex. You waking him up because his cock is in your mouth. Him whipping you around while you walk around the Manor, and boom.
✶Sex after an injury. He loves the way you’re careful with him, or how he needs to take care of you because you’re hurt. 
✶He likes giving more than receiving. WITH YOU. Because he feels like he has to thank you to put up with his shit and antics…And you do it so well, oh he just has to please you. Doesn’t mean he’s against a good old blowjob though. Oh, and damn, the good old 69 am I right ? 
✶He can be vanilla and/or rough, and you love it. He would never really hurt you (even if you ask him too, just light biting really), and most of the time you make love, rarely just fucking (unless you haven’t seen each other for a long time and you just need it)…He’s all for the sweet and cuddly aftercare. Cheesy man. 

Richard Grayson

  • What turns them on?

✶You. Your mere presence. A slight touch of your fingers on his arms. And he’s gone. It’s not always great, like, you’d be in public and you’d just touch his thigh softly, as you do, and he’d give you “that look”…
✶Snuggles. Cuddles. Oh yes. 
✶Neck kisses. It drives him beyond wild. 
✶He will get harder inside you by the mere sound of your moans…And hearing you orgasm, clenching around him, is a sure way to send him over the edge too. 

  • What turns them off?

✶Being with someone boring. Glad he found you. 
✶If he’s with a “selfish lover”. He doesn’t mind giving at all, but for him, making love is a way to show mutual respect, to show how much you mean for each other…so if he’s with someone who only think about themselves ? No.
✶When his partner is too forward about wanting sex. “Want to fuck ?” Oh. Nope, he likes when it’s subtle. When you give him sultry looks and such. He likes the building up. 
✶Bad breath. As simple as that. 

  • Kinks?

✶Once, he was arguing with you and in the heat of the moment, you slapped his face. Of course you excused yourself profusely, until you realized he went from being annoyed to argue to being very aroused…You both learned something about him that day. So, light BDSM. Who would’ve thought ?
✶He lives for silly giggly sex. Pleasure, your moans and bad puns, how could it get better than this ? 
✶Women’s mid sections. He loves slight belly and curvy hips. As simple as that.
✶He’s a sucker for romantic evening, that turns hot and steamy. 
✶Rubbing your legs, ass and back during the act. Oh yeah. 

Jason Todd

  • What turns them on?

✶Seeing you punching people. It sounds awful, but the way you don’t let anyone walk on your feet and don’t hesitate to punch people even twice your size…He loves it. 
✶If you wear a dress, your legs will instantly turn him on. He loves your legs. Especially when wrapped around his waist. 
✶You love to dance, and hum songs you like…Big turn on every time, as he can’t get enough of your voice, and you’re damn sexy when you dance. 
✶When you’re trying to contain yourself, but simply cannot. Muscles spasm and contort as you climax.

  • What turns them off?

✶Judgmental people. The kind who decides what you are before knowing you.
✶The daddy kink. Oh God, NO. 
✶It’s something kinda silly, he knows, but he hates long unclipped toe nails. Ew. You laughed the first time he told you. Well, yeah, it’s super gross. 
✶Lacks of enthusiasm and initiative. He can’t be with a woman who lets him do everything, chose everything for her. And who never initiates anything. Basically, the opposite of you. 

  • Kinks?

✶Clothed sex, because it feels like you two are so hungry for each other, that you just can’t bother getting all the clothes off. 
✶Sex games. First one to come loses. 
✶Public and semi-public sex. Hey, he likes danger. When you two are almost caught…Oh the thrill.
✶He’s very creative when it comes to sexual position. As long as your comfortable of course…He’s sure glad you’re flexible by the way.

Timothy Drake

  • What turns them on?

✶Intelligent woman. Intelligence in general. 
✶The way you look at him, with so much love, that makes him feel like he’s really wanted and needed…Sometimes, he just needs validation, as he doesn’t always gets it with his family. Fortunately, you’re here for that. 
✶Nibbling on his ears and neck, while whispering sweet nothing.
✶Eye contact. He just loves it. 

  • What turns them off?

✶Loud people. Oh God can’t they shut up ? He hasn’t slept for the past 36 hours and they’re making his head explode. Instant turn off if there’s too many noises. Though he loves your screams…It’s different ok ? 
✶If you starfish. Making love is a thing he wants to do with you, not to a very passive you. Fortunately, you’re never able to “starfish”…you’d do it as a joke sometimes, because you know he doesn’t like it, and then you wouldn’t be able to resist moving in sync with him.
✶Nothing to talk about but yourself. Someone obsessed with themselves. Oh he hates it. He’s so glad he didn’t find someone who didn’t had any subject else than themselves. He’s so glad he found you. Because with the name “Wayne” comes a plethora of women only interested in money and fame, who loves no one else but themselves. 
✶He hates feigned incompetence. Like a girl who acts like she doesn’t know anything about sex, while she’s clearly experienced. He always feels manipulated when this happens…

  • Kinks?

✶He loves to “discover boundaries”. Like what you like, dislike, what you two are willing to do, the extent you can go etc etc..Knowing just until where both of your boundaries go. 
✶You two nerds invented a secret “sex langage” to be able to talk about it in public. Of course you would.  
✶Nerdy dirty talk. Oh the puns about technologies, and pop culture you two are able to get out while making love : it’s endless. And he loves it. It makes him feel like he found just the perfect person for him. And you really are. 
✶Lazy morning sex. Bath sex. Those private moment with you, where you can just both enjoy each other. Domestic moment sex if that makes sense. 

Damian Wayne (older than his current age of course)

  • What turns them on?

✶Training together, seeing you fight and such. The way your body moves…Gets him every time. 
✶The way you look at him and tell him “I love you”. He’ll never get tired of it. Seeing the love in your eyes for him, knowing you mean it, that there’s at least one person in the world that really love and appreciate his bratty ass. 
✶When you caress his hair, fingers massaging his scalp. Soothing and arousing at the same time. 
✶The way you bite your lips or stick out your tongue when you’re focused. 

  • What turns them off?

✶He tries to be nice about it but…Body odors. If you smell because you two jumped on each other before you could take a shower…Instant turn off. Even his own smell could turn him off. Basically, if it smells bad, he won’t be able to concentrate on sex at all. He’s a living paradox however as he loves the smell of your sweat.
✶Hurting you. 
✶Rude and vulgar people. 
✶Lack of empathy.

  • Kinks?

✶Sensory deprivation. Like blindfolded, so you have to rely on trust and such. Or handcuffed, so you can’t touch and…again trust comes in. Sometimes, he would put headphones on your ears, so you wouldn’t know what his next move is by the sound…Basically, knowing you trust him and letting him do all that. 
✶He likes trying new things.But will never do anything you’re uncomfortable doing of course. Consent is key.  
✶Always the tease though. 
✶Sometimes, he’ll argue with you ON PURPOSE just for the amazing make-up sex afterward…Each time you’ll give him a look meaning : “really Damian ?”, and he’ll just smirk back at you. He knows how to push all your buttons, and oh, he just really like the way you are during make-up sex. 
✶You come first. He loves you, he wants you to be comfortable, but he also like trying new things and he’s so damn glad he found someones like you who’s willing to be adventurous. 

TREE BROS HEAD CANNONS

It’s one AM and these kinda just popped into my head LETS GO

• Connor fails his suicide attempt, Zoe finds him in his room about a minute after Connor swallowed a fuck ton of pills

•Evan hears about this cause Connor is always a main source of gossip at the school

• especially for Jared

• Evan thinks about when he failed his suicide attempt and knew, at least partly, how Connor felt

• Evan, knowing he wouldn’t be able to just walk up to Connor and start talking, starts writing letters

• Dear Connor Murphy, I heard what happened and I want you to know, I failed as well over the summer

• Evan always signing them as Sincerely Me

• Connor getting the first letter five days after he leaves the hospital, two days after he goes back to school

• Connor reading it, and thinking

• maybe I’m not completely alone

• Evan writes Connor a letter every Tuesday and Thursday

• Whenever Connor ditches school he makes sure it isn’t a Tuesday or Thursday

• Evan mentions things that go on in his life, how he wishes he could stand up for himself, how he wishes he could help his mother, how he wishes he could talk to the girl he likes

• Connor starts to develop feelings for the mystery writer but ignores it cause

• A. Who would like him

• and

• B. I don’t even know who writes the letters, how the fuck can I be in love

• Evan slowly starts to make sure Connor is doing okay when ever Connor actually shows up to his math class

• Evan slowly starts to realize that he doesn’t like Zoe as much, but why?

• Evan shoots up in bed one night thinking

• Fuck. I like the school stoner

• Evan then slaps himself cause that’s not all that Connor is

• his mom hears him talking to himself and asks if everything is alright

• Evan quickly shouts back a yes, and gets back in bed, still thinking of Connor Murphy

• the last day of school before Christmas Break, Evan leaves a small gift at Connors locker and a note even though it’s Friday

• he’s surprised to see that Connor also left a gift at his locker for the mystery writer

• Evan puts it under the tree

• Heidi asks where it came from and Evan starts blushing and stuttering and mumbling about how he writes letters to Connor Murphy

• Heidi sees the light in her sons eye that hasn’t been there in years

• She bakes cookies for Evan to give to Connor

• Evan brings the cookies to the Murphy’s house, rings the door bell and runs

• Cynthia opens the door to see a plate of cookies and card saying ‘Dear Connor Murphy, have an excellent Christmas, sincerely me’

• Cynthia is super excited cause she believes that Connor has an actual FRIEND

• Cynthia takes the cookies up to her sons room

• Connor opens the door, glaring at his mother, and then he sees the cookies and the note card

• he picks it up and reads it quickly before blushing and grabs the plate, shutting his door

• on Christmas Evan opens Connors present last and is very happy to see that it’s a tree encyclopedia with a note that said ‘you always talk about how you love trees so, here’ and on the other side is a beautifully drawn tree

• CONNOR MURPHY CAN DRAW SO FUCKING WELL AND EVAN JUST MELTS AT THE TREE AND HE INSTANTLY PINS IT TO HIS WALL

• Connor opens his gift in his room, and is surprised to see two new black sweatshirts and a bottle of black nail polish, the saying ‘Dear Connor Murphy, your sweatshirts seem to have a lot of holes, I didn’t know if it was for comfort or what but I got you a new one. Oh and I really like your nails so here’s some more polish, sincerely me’ Connor actually smiles, and he feels all warm inside AND WHY DO I FEEL LIKE THIS WHAT THE FUCK

• Jared eventually finds out that Evan writes Connor letters cause he saw the tree on the wall while Evan was getting snacks and flipped it over and read the note

• he immediately asked Evan who it was from

• Evan blushes and mumbles Connor

• Jared demands a wider explanation

• he doesn’t stop teasing Evan about it

• At school Jared starts acting funny around Connor and Connor starts to freak out cause

• SHIT IS JARED THE LETTER GUY

• but he calms down for a second when Jared accidentally spills the beans

• Connor was reading another one of Evans’s notes, Jared walks up to him with a shit eating grin and says

• ‘Another love note from Evan Tree Boy Hansen I see.’

• Connor is instantly relieved they’re not from Jared

• he then freaks out cause THE CUTE QUIET DORKY NERD THAT SITS BEHIND ME IN MATH WRITES ME FUCKING LETTERS

• Connor corners Evan after school

• Evan is nervous cause he thinks Connor hates him.

• he is pleasantly surprised when Connor gives him a quick thank you before dashing off

• Connor then starts to write Evan letters on Wednesdays and Fridays. Monday’s are the chill day

• Connor finally accepts that he totally loves Evan but he still thinks that Evan could never like him that way, especially since the guy Evan mentions in his letter can’t be him

• beautiful brown hair? Nope

• gorgeous blue eyes that seem to have a hint of brown in the left one? Well yes but they aren’t gorgeous, his are hideous

• a face that was crafted by God himself? Absolutely not

• Evan starts to wonder if Connor wants to be friends with him and asks him exactly that in a letter

• Connor replies with a 'no shit’ and his phone number

• Evan was ecstatic when they hung out for the first time

• so was Connor

• and their moms

• at the end of senior year, Evan tells Connor that he has to take a gap year to save up money

• Connor decides he’s not going to college without Evan as he doesn’t know how to make friends and he was just fucking lucky with Evan

• They were hanging out at Evans house the next winter and they both had a few drinks cause what 18 year old doesn’t drink. Evan isn’t THAT innocent guys

• they both tell each other that they like one another and share a small kiss that they both have wanted for a while

• they fall asleep on the couch, holding each other

Imma stop there. Feel free to add on, that was insanely long and I might write an actual thing for this?

in which jack and shitty accidentally date

based on a dream I had, I present: a short semi-fic about Jack and Shitty and their day-long, beautiful relationship.

Basically, this is what happens:

At a kegster during their freshmen year, in which Shitty is running around being the life of the party even though he’s a freshman, Jack is also in attendance– talking to Berger and Marsh in the kitchen. Jack is there, partly to keep an eye on Shitty, partly because he is surprised by how much he does like some of the guys on his team, mostly because they had won today and Jack is in quite a good mood. Not a good enough mood that he is going to risk going into the living room where music is blasting, but in a good enough mood that he is holding a solo cup of beer and chilling in the kitchen, chatting with Berger and Marsh. He is at ease as Jack ever is– laughing good naturedly as they tease both him and each other and of course, this is when the trouble starts.

The trouble is this: Marsh is drunk and excited that Jack has actually shown up to a Haus kegster and since Jack seems to be in a good mood, Marsh decides to take a risk and ask Jack a Question. More specifically, Marsh rams an friendly elbow into Jack’s ribs and goes:

“Yo, Zimmermann, you like anyone on campus yet?”

A few months prior, that question would have made Jack freeze up. But now, Jack smiles easily (because honestly, it is a rather respectful question– “like” instead of “fuck”; “anyone” instead of assuming “girl”) and he certainly doesn’t want to get into his romantic history or lack of crushes so he smiles, shrugs, and says

“Nah, love’s shitty,” It’s still friendly and he smiles and asks Berg about his crush that the whole team knows about and that should be that.

The problem, however, is that what Alex Berger and Carter Marsh heard was not “Nah, love’s shitty,” but “I’m in love with Shitty.”

Which, of course, is a much bigger deal. 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

can we get some hcs for soft boy richie??

YESS HES SUCH A FUCKING SOFT BOY

(thank you @eddiesbadbreak and @stanleyuriis for some of the HCs ily)

- God, Richie is such a hopeless romantic underneath all the bullshit he spews.

- Richie is starved for attention and affection at home, which often makes him question whether he deserves that at all. So he craves attention so much, especially from Eddie.

- When they’re not bickering or joking around, Richie is so sweet with Eddie. But he definitely has to be in that mood. When Eddie is affectionate with him, calls him pet names or says that he loves Richie, Richie pretty much crumbles.

- Tbh the first time Eddie says “I love you”, Richie almost tears up because like… no one says that to him. It means more than anything because someone actually loves him and he loves them back and it’s all so amazing.

- He’s pretty sensitive, especially when it comes to his insecurities and his family situation. He totally does not show it often though, and the only people that know the true extent of how he’s feeling inside are Eddie and Bev.

- Richie is SUCH a cuddler, and often likes to be the one cuddled. He loves being the little spoon or being the one to rest his head on Eddie’s chest instead of the other way around. He loves laying with his head on Eddie’s lap when they’re with the other Losers.

- If Eddie runs his fingers through his hair, he melts instantly. He loves that shit.

- In general, he loves being taken care of by Eddie. He’s never had anyone take care of him before, so if Eddie ever acts that way it makes Richie so happy. It makes Eddie happy too because he’s always the one being babied, so he loves being on the other side especially because he just… cares so much and has so much love to give to Richie?

- Like one time Eddie packs Richie lunch for school and Richie’s like !!! This is what true bliss is. He’s smiling all day from this small gesture.

- It’s so canon that Richie keeps a spare inhaler for Eddie.

- Any time anyone laughs at his jokes it makes him SO happy. He feels awesome if people actually think he’s funny.

- Also if anyone compliments him, he’ll brush it off or make a joke out of it but everyone can always see how happy and mushy that makes him as well. He feels so valid when he feels like the people he loves love him back.

- Secretly when no one’s there, Richie and Eddie are SO fucking cheesy with each other omg. They call each other pet names. Besides the typical “Eds” or “Eddie Spaghetti” that Richie calls Eddie, he also very often calls him “babe” (which Eddie loves), or he’ll get real creative and call him absurd things like “Snicker Doodle” or “Cuddle Muffin” (which Eddie hates)

- Eddie will often call Richie “Rich”, “Red” or “Sweetie” and Richie dies every time he always gets butterflies in his stomach

- They go on cheesy dates a lot of the time: Stargazing, Rollerblading, even sharing a milkshake with two straws. A lot of the time though, the two like spending the whole day being lazy and staying in bed and eating junk food.

- Richie is super gentle with Eddie, but Eddie is also super gentle with Richie? Especially if Richie is upset, Eddie is so patient with him and will stay up comforting him all night if that’s what he wants. They’re just really careful with each other.

- Bev sometimes paints his nails and Richie really likes the way they look. He usually only lets her do one hand, though.

- Richie also loves when Bev puts hair clips in his hair to push his bangs back. She did it for the first time when making Richie do a face mask with her, but after Richie said he thought it looked really cute she continued.

- He even started doing it to keep his bangs out of his eyes when he was doing work at home. Eddie thinks it’s the cutest thing ever. Richie also loves headbands.

- Richie has THE LONGEST LASHES and SO MANY FRECKLES HE’S JUST SO PRETTY

- In general, Richie is actually so caring with his friends? I mean of course, he’ll roast and make fun of them to the moon and back but in reality they’re the most important people in his life and he would die for any one of them any day.

- No one would expect it, but he always remembers birthdays and anniversaries. He writes such long cards for all the Losers whenever it’s their birthday, talking about why he thinks each of them individually is awesome and making long lists of all the inside jokes they have together.

- He also is the best gift giver. His gifts are so thoughtful even if they’re small. He remembers what people told him they wanted months ago, or he gives them gifts that have to do with inside jokes. Things that only he could gift.

- Richie always stands up for any of the Losers without even a second thought. After Henry and his gang are gone, it’s rare for them to get bullied, especially in High School. If they ever do, it’s all verbal. They don’t really get beat up anymore. But if anyone is being a dick to any of his friends, he ALWAYS stands up to them and isn’t afraid to cuss them out, even if it means him getting detention.

- He also comforts them after they get picked on. Even underclassmen he doesn’t know. If he sees a freshman getting picked on, he’ll tell the bully to fuck off and smile so wide at the kid, telling them they’re okay!

- Tbh everyone in High School LOVES him. They think he can be kinda annoying sometimes, but he’s a genuinely good guy and he’s super funny.

- Richie is that cheesy boyfriend that picks flowers to give to Eddie. They also put flowers in each other’s long hair and Richie takes a million pictures.

- Richie saves and pressed into a book the flowers that Eddie got him after the opening night of the school musical he was starring in. His heart skipped a beat when Eddie brought him flowers and told him how amazing he was.

- As adults, Richie is so caring about Eddie especially after dealing with losing his arm. He’s so accommodating and supporting and just loves Eddie so much. After he knows Eddie is okay, all he wants is to have a happy life with him.

- As an adult, Eddie also calls Richie “Reggie” because of one time where another radio host introduced him as “Reggie Tozier.” Like you don’t even know how funny this was to Eddie. It made him tear up from laughter for like a full week after it happened, so to tease him sometimes Eddie will call him that. Richie acts like it pisses him off but he thinks it’s pretty funny himself.

- Richie’s the type of husband that comes home with flowers and is like “BAAAABE I GOT YOU FLOWERS AREN’T I THE BEST HUSBAND EVER”

- Holy shit Richie is SUCH a softie when it comes to him marrying Eddie and later when they adopt/surrogate children. Richie cries for half the wedding and then after they get their kids he tears up like EVERY damn day about it.

- He’s just so happy to actually have a family? For once in his life? Like HE built this. It’s HIS family. He gets to come home every day to such happiness it’s like unreal to him it makes him get choked up.

- BEFORE THEIR FIRST KID ARRIVES RICHIE CANNOT STOP TALKING ABOUT HOW CUTE BABY SHOES ARE.

- HE BUYS SO MANY PAIRS OF BABY SHOES THEY’RE SO SMALL THERES NO WAY THEIR CHILD’S FOOT WILL BE THAT SMALL CAN ANYTHING EVEN BE THAT SMALL??

- BUT THEN IT IS THAT SMALL AND ITS AMAZING HE LOVES IT.

- Even as adults Richie and Eddie always go on such nice dates. They never get sick of being together, especially since they feel like they have to make up for so much lost time. When they’re back together as adults it feels like falling in love all over again except this time they can actually be together and it makes Richie thank God for real.

- It’s so fucking important for Richie to be a good dad since he knows what it’s like to have horrible parents. He just wants to do what’s right.

- Overall Richie is such a sweetheart under all those dick jokes. He’s so fucking soft and good. That’s all.

A Definitely Incomplete List Of My Favorite Moments From The Lightning Thief (book), because I'm having Feelings
  • Percy very causally mentioning times he accidentally hit a school bus with a canon or dropped fifth graders into shark-infested water
  • Grover Underwood
  • Just everything he’s ever done
  • Percy running an illegal candy ring out of his dorm room 
  • “I was worried they found out I got my essay on Tom Sawyer from the internet and were going to take away my grade. Or worse, they were going to make me read the book.”
  • When Percy thought Grover was going to give him some deep, meaningful commentary on life to make him feel better but Grover just wanted Percy’s lunch
  • Percy tried so hard to do well on his Latin final and Chiron somehow thinks it’s a good idea to tell him he’s ‘not normal’ in front of the class my poor boy
  • That one part where Percy essentially went “Oh hey mom’s home!!! Better reschedule this panic attack I was having!!” 
  • When Percy did that weird hand sign (that was never explained) and the door slammed on Gabe so hard he flew up the steps
  • The fact that when Grover finally tracked Percy down he wasn’t wearing any pants. Like, there was literally no reason for him to not have the fake feet and the jeans on. No actual reason for him to be free balling it. Percy just needed a shock apparently. Showing up in the middle of a hurricane with no pants, dramatic ass satyr I love him. 
  • The SATISFYING DEATH of Gabe’s Camaro + Sally apparently learned bullfighting just in case because she truly is the best mom
  • Percy killing the minotaur with its own horn
  • Percy dragging Grover over the camp line while crying for his mom literally end me
  • You drool when you sleep.” could we get more iconic here
  • Percy teasing Annabeth about her crush on Luke
  • When Luke stole some toiletries for Percy and he got a little choked up because it was apparently the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him
  • The fact that Chiron basically told Annabeth that Percy was her destiny
  • The fact that a recovering alcoholic god of wine who hates children was deemed fit to run a camp for children
  • Not so fun: Percy, upon meeting Mr. D, immediately recognizing the signs of an alcoholic and going out of his way to sit far away from him ‘just in case’
  • The fact that everyone just expected him to hear ‘the greek gods are real’ and move on?? why would no one let this boy be in shock omg
  • Zeus apparently had a thing for the fluffy 80′s hairstyles
  • “the real world is where the monsters are” 
  • The fact that Poseidon could have claimed Percy at literally any moment but he apparently decided he really needed that dramatic reveal during capture the flag.
  • When Zeus was feeling Extra Dramatic™ after Percy’s claiming so he started making it rain inside the camp boarders and everyone was lowkey freaking out
  • When Annabeth pulls off her invisible cap and declares she’s going on the quest with him and Percy was like, beyond unsurprised that she was there and didn’t even attempt to fight her 
  • Chiron forgot to give Percy a sword from his father for like, an entire month. 
  • Grover with those freaking flying shoes oh my God
  • Annabeth blushing literally any time Luke talks to her 
  • IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE AND RESPECT ARGUS, HEAD OF CAMP SECURITY
  • lmao when Percy and Annabeth start bickering about something and Argus just winks at Percy because he knows
  • When they were playing hackey sack with an apple but it got too close to Grover’s mouth and he just ate the whole thing
  • The entire bus scene oh my God
  • “I was about to become the ADHD Poster Child of the Year” as he’s CRASHING A BUS
  • Annabeth on a fury’s back 
  • the explosion. just. all gr8. 
  • When Grover tries to play a path finder song and Percy just immediately slams into a tree. Also the fact that the path finder song was actually just a Hillary Duff number. 
  • “You two are giving me a migraine, and satyr’s don’t even get migraines!” 
  • Percy actually, truly trying to sell the story that the three of them are circus orphans who got separated from their ringleader 
  • Grover: hey guys this place is REALLY SHADY and we need to leave
  • Annabeth and Percy: but f o o d
  • Can you imagine walking into a store and finding your dead uncle’s body on display? Like????
  • When Medusa revealed herself and Annabeth’s running around invisible, Percy’s swinging a sword blindly and Grover’s flying around screaming and trying to whack her with a stick: everyone here is a MESS
  • When Annabeth was overly annoyed with Percy after that ordeal??? Sweetheart you fell for the trick too
  • Name something more iconic than 12 year old Percy Jackson mailing the decapitated head of Medusa to the gods on Mt. Olympus in an act of sheer pettiness. I dare you. 
  • When Percy was insisting on taking first watch while the others slept and Grover was basically like “hey kiddo listen to this” and played a song that immediately knocked him out so he could sleep all night 
  • “Percy. Say hello to the poodle.”
  • Percy seeing all the Greek creatures from the train window 
  • When Annabeth was dragging the boys to the St. Louis Arch and Percy’s claustrophobic ass Did Not Want To Get In That Tiny Elevator but he went anyway because he wanted Annabeth to be happy. That boy has had it bad since the start. 
  • “I am Echidna!”
  • “Isn’t…isn’t that a type of anteater?”
  • I HATE AUSTRALIA.” 
  • How many times has Percy actually been poisoned throughout all the series I literally want a count 
  • ‘Lemme just, uh….jump off the fucking St. Louis Arch and hope I don’t die when I hit the water.’
  • There is just something very aesthetic about Percy lighting a fire in the bottom of a river 
  • Percy’s got so much pent-up rage that he’s just immediately ready to wreck Ares upon meeting him omfg
  • THE THRILL RIDE O’ LOVE
  • Annabeth getting so worked up and flustered over going down there with Percy because it’s a love ride and Percy’s just like “you literally do not have to make this a Thing” lmao
  • Annabeth wouldn’t let Percy touch Aphrodite’s scarf because she didn’t want him getting infected by love magic but then…touched it herself lol
  • The entire sequence with the mechanical spiders and the cameras and the ride itself 
  • Percy’s plan to get off the ride!!!! He’s so smart okay can people stop calling him stupid!!! 
  • Grover trying to catch them both in mid-air but they‘re too heavy so the three of them just kind of slowly crash into one of those face-cut-out posters lol
  • Percy, turning to the camera’s broadcasting this shit on Olympus: “Show’s over! Thank You! Goodnight!” 
  • THE FUCKING ZOO BUS
  • Everything about that scene omg. The animals they had to help. Trying to convince Grover of how great he is. The baby percabeth. my h e a r t
  • “What if it does line up like the Trojan War? Athena versus Poseidon?”
  • “I don’t know what my mom will do. I just know I’ll be fighting next to you.”
  • “Why?”
  • “Because you’re my friend, Seaweed Brain, any more stupid questions?”
  • Do you hear that sound? That’s me, ages 13-21(+) sobbing uncontrollably oh my God I love them so much
  • ‘let’s just set a fucking lion loose in Las Vegas’ 
  • “I put a Blessing of the Wild on them, so they’ll safely find food and shelter wherever they go.”
  • “Why can’t you put on of those on us?”
  • “It only works on wild animals.”
  • “So it would only effect Percy…”
  • “HEY!” 
  • When they get to the Lotus hotel and Grover starts playing that game where the deer shoot the hunters azxjhnhdjx
  • Percy physically having to drag his friends out of there once he realized it was the lair of the lotus eaters
  • When Annabeth gave the taxi driver her lotus credit card and he started calling her “Your Highness” lmao
  • Every time in this book Percy comes close to uncovering a Dark Truth the people around him are just like “let’s not worry about that :) “ and my polite boy actually shuts up it’s so wild because I would just keep going lol
  • CRUSTY THE WATER BED SALESMAN 
  • Listen that entire scene has lowkey always been one of my Favs and I’m not even sure why but Percy chopping his head off was g r e a t
  • The entrance to the Underworld is DOA Recording Studios and I love it
  • “We, uh…all drowned in a bathtub.”
  • Poor Charon just wants his Italian suits he doesn’t need all this bullshit 
  • Grover almost getting dragged into Tartarus: not good. very bad. bad shit. 
  • Annabeth getting emotionally attached to Cerberus in the span of 3 minutes: RELATABLE 
  • ‘huh my backpack that I thought I got rid of five days ago is getting weirdly heavy, that’s not suspicious though, right?’ 
  • When Hades just starts monologue-ing about all the shit he has to put up with
  • “what kind of awful things do you have to do to get sewn into Hades underwear?” p e r c y
  • when Percy realizes the Master Bolt is in his backpack and he’s just like. tell me why. why. I’m a good person. what did I DO. 
  • When Percy has to sacrifice his mom to get Annabeth and Grover out of there I Cri Evey Tiem 
  • My cute lil’ baby yelling around on a beach to get Ares to show up 
  • ahdbsjznx when Grover gives Percy a crushed, half eaten tin can for good like and Percy is just like “Grover…I don’t know what to say.” I LOVE HIM
  • My sweet son kicking the god of war’s ass. bless. blessed on this day. 
  • The news crews who suddenly started backtracking and writing Percy as a hero 
  • Percy, choking back tears, giving Gabe’s store’s phone number out on national television and promising everyone free appliances IM STILL CACKLING I LOVE THIS BOY SO MUCH HE’S ICONIC 
  • Hades actually releasing Sally because he’s Not As Big Of A Dick As He Could Have Been 
  • Percy: hey I think there’s a really good chance that Kronos was behind this whole mess-
  • Zeus and Poseidon: XXX KRONOS DO NOT INTERACT XXX
  • Poseidon rolling his eyes at literally everything Zeus says and does
  • Poseidon and Percy’s whole talk omg my sweet boy just wants his dad to love him and Poseidon’s trying to figure out how to show affection when he basically signed this kid’s death sentence I’m crying 
  • A man will never satisfy me as much or in the same way as Sally Jackson murdering Gabe Ugliano did 
  • Percy was spending months of summer stressing over who the friend that’s supposed to betray him was but like…Sweetie you had exactly three (3) friends and you knew two of them weren’t gonna hurt you
  • ahbdjsnx when Percy and Luke were having their conversation in the woods and like Luke’s acting shady af the whole time but it’s literally not until he litters that Percy is like “something…is Wrong.” this boy I s2g
  • Percy getting bit by a scorpion is Not A Favorite Moment but the nymphs helping him out was 
  • Percy making his Official Decision to go home for the school year only after Annabeth reveals that he actually did talk her into trying again with her family 
  • I didn’t mean to write out a summary of the whole damn book it’s six am listen I’m just feeling nostalgia for the original series in this chili’s tonight 
  • whoops

anonymous asked:

What do you think about an “i picked up your bag at the airport but i can’t find your number so i’m about to embark on the largest scavenger hunt of all time by using your strange belongings to track you down” au with charmer or nurseydex or zimbits or something??

Well, I don’t know if you expected three mini fics, and I didn’t fully follow the prompt, but here we are.

1. Charmer

Look, Chris knew it was dumb. He knew that everyone on earth had a plain black suitcase, he knew he should have double-checked the luggage tag, he knew it was important to be sure abut these things. But knowing what he should have done couldn’t help him when he finally got his suitcase home and opened it up to find mostly yoga pants and sundresses. 

Fuck.

He zipped the bag back up and flipped open the luggage tag. It was cute, pink with some metallic lettering saying “I’m outta here!” in a handwritten font. Chris blamed jetlag and the redeye flight for making him miss the fact that it wasn’t his Sharks tag. He blamed the bag’s owner for not filling out any of the information on the tag.

Dammit.

Well, sorry random girl, he thought. He opened the suitcase up again to try to see if he could find anything that would give him a clue as to who the suitcase owner was. He moved a makeup bag aside, and hit gold immediately. Well, Samwell red. A Women’s Volleyball tshirt– mystery suitcase girl had to be on the volleyball team.

“Hey Ransom!” he yelled. “You’re facebook friends with all the volleyball team right?”

“He’s friends with everyone on campus!” Holster yelled back.

“Ask their captain if anyone flew in from the Bay Area and lost their luggage!”

_X_

“Is Justin here? My captain said he’s got my suitcase.” Chris overheard her at the door. He grabbed the bag and started hauling it downstairs. As he set it down at the bottom and caught sight of the girl in the doorway, he froze. She was pretty. Like, really pretty. 

“Um, hi,” he said.

“So you’re Justin? Oh my god, I’m so glad it wasn’t some total rando who got my bag.” 

“I’m actually Chris, Justin was just the one who was friends with your captain. Um, I’m sorry, but I kind of had to look through your stuff? Your luggage tag wasn’t filled out.” The girl laughed.

“Yours wasn’t either! Me and my teammates were like one minute away from googling the record holder for most San Jose Sharks merch, but it totally makes sense that you’re on the hockey team.” 

“Since we both forgot to write our numbers down, maybe we should do that now?” Chris suggested. The girl grinned, grabbed his phone out of his hand, and opened up a new contact. She punched in a number, and when she handed it back he saw a text of several random emojis addressed to the new contact of “Caitlin Farmer” with a girl farmer emoji and a volleyball emoji.

“Text me sometime, and maybe we can get dinner?” she said, and she was gone with her suitcase. 

Chris collapsed on the couch, a dreamy look in his eyes.

“Chowder? You get your suitcase back?” Bitty called out from the kitchen.

“Yeah! and I think I’m in love now!”

2. Nurseydex

“Cheryl, I’m telling you, I had a ton of inspiration on the plane and I wrote some great stuff for act three. No. No, it wasn’t just me thinking it’s great because I popped some melatonin and got really sleepy. It’s like, legit. Yeah, I’ll send it over as soon as I get home and–”

Derek slammed into something. If he’d been holding his phone in his hand (bluetooth is a blessing when you drop stuff easily) it would have launched across the airport. As it was, his post-flight latte was soaking through the nice white shirt of the handsome stranger in front of him.

“Shit,” the stranger said, looking down to survey the damage.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have trusted myself to make a phone call and not be clumsy after such a long flight,” Derek said. He set his briefcase down and pulled a wad of napkins out of the outside pocket. The guy took a deep breath, going from murderous to calm in a few seconds. 

“I wasn’t looking where I was going either, it’s not your fault,” the guy said, setting down his own briefcase and accepting the napkins. He blotted at his shirt.

“Let me pay for the dry cleaning. Or a replacement,” Derek offered. The man shook his head.

“It’s fine, it probably needed to go to the cleaners anyways.” He checked his watch. “If I run, I can probably get a new one before my meeting.” He wadded the napkins into one big ball, picked up his briefcase, and walked towards the exit with a terse nod. Derek, feeling terrible about the whole thing, picked up his own briefcase and walked to baggage claim.

By the time he was reunited with his home office, a cozy bookshelf-lined room in his brownstone, he had almost forgotten about the coffee incident. He was focused on sending the manuscript to Cheryl. Unfortunately, that was going to be difficult, considering he pulled a PC laptop out of the bag instead of his Mac.

Derek stared at the computer for a full minute. He almost couldn’t believe that this was happening to him. Hesitantly, he opened the laptop. On one side of the keyboard there was a weird thing that a few seconds of phone googling told him was a fingerprint scanner. Shit. He hit the space bar experimentally. Something flashed on the screen, and then was replaced with just a plain black screen with red text: ACCESS DENIED

Derek swore. He started to look through the rest of what was in the briefcase, but was disappointed to find it empty except for the laptop’s charger, three packs of gum, and receipts from a lobster shack in Maine. Shit. Nothing in here would tell him anything about the redhead he’d launched a latte at. 

He closed the laptop dejectedly, ignored his editor’s text messages, and went into the kitchen to make himself lunch and feel sorry for himself. This was the universe punishing him for covering a cute guy with coffee. If he had just kept his focus and waited to call his editor later, he could have sent the draft along and saved it and not be desperately trying to remember his inspiration.

Just as the self-pity spiral was really taking off, the doorbell rang. Derek sighed, put down his tea, and walked to the door. When he opened it, it wasn’t Girl Scouts or Jehovah’s Witnesses, but the guy from the airport.

“Cancel whatever you’re doing today, I need to teach you the most basic principles of digital security,” the guy said, pushing past Derek into the dining room. He shoved a stack of papers onto a chair and pulled Derek’s laptop out.

“I’m Will, by the way, I make software that’s hopefully a step ahead of viruses.”

“Is the draft still there?”

“The draft of what?” The guy looked confused.

“My third act breakthrough. I’m a novelist, I need to get it to my editor and I couldn’t remember if I saved it,” Derek explained.

“You know you can set up an auto-save every five minutes or so, right?” Will asked.

“This might be surprising to you, but I’ve never had a cute guy storm into my house and yell at me about computers before.” Will looked up from Derek’s computer, blushing.

“I haven’t had a cute guy dump a gallon of coffee all over me and steal my laptop before, either, but here we are.”

“Maybe you can yell about computers over lunch with me?”

3. Zimbits

Button downs. Tank tops. Slacks. Shorts. Three rolling pins. A pie tin. A half-emptied multipack of sharpies.

No lucky puck. No clothes in his size. No jerseys.

Jack sighed. It would just be too much to ask for anything to go well today. He picked up his phone to call someone with the Falconers, in the hope that they could talk to the airline and sort all this out. At the same time, his phone lit up with Tater’s face.

“Zimmboni! Look on twitter. Small internet baker has your suitcase!” Tater hung up before he could reply, so Jack just opened twitter instead. 

omgcheckplease: A bunch of pucks, some dirty jerseys, and a history textbook. Either I’m back in college or this isn’t my suitcase.

omgcheckplease: .@falcsofficial please tell your #1 player to DM me and come get his shit

omgcheckplease: and @falcsofficial tell him to give me my shit back. my hockey days are in the past, I need rolling pins, not a mouthguard

Jack smiled and laughed in the way a person laughs when they’re alone, just blowing more air than normal out of his nose. He looked through the twitter for a minute– the guy, Eric Bittle, was a Providence-based chef, whose latest tweets were mostly greetings to the various cities he’d been visiting on tour. Jack clicked the media tab on the account, and looked through the pictures. Bittle was cute. He wrote a reply.

zimmboni: .@omgcheckplease how do I send u a DM

omgcheckplease: .@zimmboni you don’t deserve to be verified, oh my god #verifybittle2k17

A few seconds later another notification popped up, and he tapped it to be brought to a DM window.

omgcheckplease: hey! sorry about the mixup. I can only imagine how confused you were to find all my book tour stuff.

zimmboni: Probably as confused as you were finding hockey stuff?

omgcheckplease: I wasn’t joking in my tweets, I did play hockey before I got into the whole cookbook/food show thing

zimmboni: Exactly, I did a book tour last year in the off-season :-)

omgcheckplease: oh my gosh, isn’t it the best and the worst?

zimmboni: I know. It’s great to meet people and talk about your work, but it’s exhausting.

omgcheckplease: that’s why I’m so excited to be back in Providence! at least until the next cookbook.

zimmboni: Well we should probably meet up to trade suitcases. Want to meet somewhere for dinner?

omgcheckplease: don’t trust me to learn where your house is?

zimmboni: I mean, if dinner goes well enough…

omgcheckplease: OH. okay, then, Mr. Zimmermann, it’s a date.

Jack smiled to himself, and got ready for his date.

The Group Project

(Jimin is jealous when his best friend and roommate, Taehyung, has a date with the girl Jimin has a crush on.)

Warning: 8000 words and 75% of this is pure smut. MMF sex.  Dirty talking.  Disrespectful name calling.   The usual.


“Fuck you, Kim Taehyung! FUCK! YOU!”  Jimin was livid.  “I’ve never said a single thing to you about all the shit I have to put up with as your roommate!  All the times I’ve had to crash at a friend’s place because you brought some girl back to our dorm room for the night!  I can’t remember the last time I spent a whole week able to sleep in my own bed because of you!  And all those times I woke up to find some chick I don’t know in your bed?  Like you couldn’t just go somewhere else to fuck them? Did you really have to screw them in our room while I was asleep?”  Taehyung opened his mouth to answer, but Jimin cut him off.  “And I wasn’t even asleep for all of them!  What was that one girls name? The one with the short hair? Jungin? Jungah?  Just because you took her into our bathroom to have her suck your dick doesn’t mean I didn’t hear EVERY FUCKING THING that happened in there!  You are so fucking vile!  The things you said to that girl… the sound of her choking on your dick while you called her a slut?  What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“Some girls like that shit,” Taehyung replied calmly.  “She definitely liked it, that’s for sure.”

Jimin rolled his eyes dismissively.  “The point is that I’ve never said anything to you about how you’ve stuck your dick in half the women on campus.  Despite the fact that you are always inconveniencing me in order to get your rocks off, I’ve kept my mouth shut.  It’s your life and it’s not really any of my business.  But this is TOO FUCKING MUCH!  I thought we were friends?  I never thought you would totally screw me over like this!”

“We are friends!  I didn’t do this to screw you over.” Taehyung and Jimin had been randomly assigned to be roommates in their small single room dorm room their freshman year and immediately became the best of friends.  Taehyung was on a scholarship that paid for his student housing on campus and Jimin couldn’t imagine living with anyone other than Taehyung, so despite the cramped quarters and the arguments frequently caused by the lack of privacy, they continued living together in the dormitory.

Keep reading

characterization, filters, and characterization to be found in the lack of filters

Talking about Jane earlier got me thinking, you know, Jane is not at all the only character that uses this device to show off the less desirable traits lurking in the psyche of all these damaged teens. Like. So many characters have these lurking deep seated issues that stay hidden deep down because the characters are pretty good at projecting a less damaged and more together version of themselves. 

If that sounds familiar it’s because it’s a fucking outrageously relatable quality and part of what makes the Homestuck characters RESONATE so much. Why they feel like they have all this dimension and depth that makes us grab on to them and never want to let go. 

I’m just going to run through some examples here while I’m thinking about it. The first OBVIOUSLY since thinking about her is what got me going on this – Jane. Crockertier Jane removing the layers of self-imposed filter on Jane’s festering insecurity, entitlement issues, jealousy and so on. I’ve already talked enough about that today.

Grimbark Jade! You notice Jade says what she’s thinking WAY more easily while she’s mind controlled, and she still sounds like herself – she sounds kinda like she does when she’s owning Karkat repeatedly, doesn’t she? Because angry Jade has that same effect of pushing her nice girl filter aside and letting the angry witch (not a cutesy slur, her literal witch class) within fly free. Grimbark Jade tells us that behind that nice girl front Jade Harley actually thinks some pretty uncharitable thoughts sometimes, she just keeps a tight fucking lid on it because – well, don’t most people? Relatable as fuck. 

Jadesprite! Since we’re talking about Jade anyway. Jade likes to think she has everything together, that her visions from Skaia and her scientific prowess and the tools her Grandpa left her are more than enough to handle everything that comes her way, she’s independent, she’s capable, she’s certainly never LONELY oh no of course not certainly never CRUSHINGLY OVERWHELMED by the responsibility of her own existence nah those are weak feelings for weak girls who aren’t as awesome as Jade! And then – Jadesprite. Why do you think Jade got SO ANGRY at Jadesprite? Because she was being confronted with something she knew deep down was a reflection of weaknesses in herself (totally normal ones that her later arc reinforced were a mistake to pretend weren’t there – Loneliness and fear and regret are all tied in with Jade’s character progression and learning how to deal with those things is where I imagine her arc would have gone if Homstuck’s ending hadn’t been the literary equivalent of chopping off a limb and cauterizing the wound.) Jadesprite is Jade without the filter of implacable strength Jade imposes on herself to fuckin cope with living on a hell island with the stuffed corpse of her grandpa who she grew up thinking literally killed himself at BEST.  god damn

Davesprite. Dave Strider with a slow long agonizing depressing arc wherein he realizes his coolkid persona won’t make anyone think of him as their best friend anymore, and in the absence of the security that persona afforded him when he was The Real Dave he has no idea what to do with himself. He’s lost, he feels aimless, untethered, incapable of being happy – and yes, Davesprite is his own character, but you can still infer a lot from Dave’s character about him – for instance, how he completely ties his self worth up in how useful he is to his friends or how worthwhile they find him and has no idea how to even BEGIN the hard journey of looking within for worth instead of relying eternally on changeable external sources. Davesprite is Dave not WITHOUT a filter but certainly with a VERY DIFFERENT one.

Homestuck does this with almost every single damn character on its roster at some point. Shows a version of them with a different or lesser or completely missing filter to highlight flaws and issues and internal struggles of all kinds. 

Homestuck is a damn deep dive into an exercise about analyzing nature vs nurture and what we’re predisposed to do and what comes from within and what is put upon us by forces out of our control, and how that line is blurry and messy and everyone has the potential to be either the worst or best version of themselves. Even Caliborn was given a choice. Hussie-The-Character explained it to him at great painstaking length. 

There are so many other examples. Jasprose is Rose without a filter, and the way Jasprose goes around gleefully calling every hot girl she sees hot and delighting smugly in knowing more than just about anyone else and lording over the information and playing smarter-than-thou games – that tells us a LOT about Rose! A LOT about what sort of urges Rose tamps down on every day in an effort to just be fucking cool! 

I bet you have things like this with yourself, right? Doesn’t everyone?

Tricksters! Look at how they act. They’re not themselves but there is plenty to glean from them. Jane immediately goes for Jake, the object of her desire, to pursue an exaggerated version of her idealized future. Trickster Jake is a passive fucking ragdoll who immediately acquiesces to everything everyone demands of him because their happiness becomes his happiness – Jake hates confrontation, so Trickster Jake is just a fucking doormat. Roxy goes for Jake AND Dirk because divorced from the guilt she normally feels for harboring desire toward either one of them she knows exactly what she wants! ETC ETC. Of course they would never do any of this shit if they weren’t high as balls and incapable of understanding the meaning of the word “consequence.” That’s the point. Seeing what they do in this situation is an interesting window in!

Brain Ghost Dirk is a version of Jake (yes, of Jake, not Dirk) without a specific filter Jake runs his own personality through before he’s comfortable presenting it to others, and you’ll notice, it’s EXTREMELY biting and critical sometimes. Jake knows what he’s about. He just buries it most of the time because that’s easier than dealing with it. 

I could seriously keep going. 

Homestuck loves to show us what our favorites do and say and ARE when basic filters go out the window. Those filters that most of us employ to make other people believe we don’t all have intrusive thoughts or bad desires or just plain old weaknesses we’re ashamed of and want to keep hidding at costs – or that we occasionally think things or think about doing things we would never ever ever do in real life are demolished or changed or temporarily suspended. 

It’s brilliant tbh. It lets us see facets of characters that would normally never really get full spotlight reveals by their very nature, especially with protagonists. 

Vriska vs (Vriska) – (Vriska) is just Vriska with some more self awareness and more willingness to let down her self-imposed filter and actually examine the shit she wants and why because watching Aranea fuck the timeline over out of motivations eerily similar to her own hardcore shook her enough to develop in that direction. (which makes sense since HER original motivations are copying Mindfang who IS alt-aranea lmao I love Homestuck)  (Vriska) is still Vriska, it’s just a very very different lens through which to view her character. 

blah blah blah blah etc there are so many examples

anyway I love Homestuck and good character writing what up

anonymous asked:

Hi~! Could I request for HC or scenario where MC asks RFA + V and Saeran to pretend to be their SO for Valentines day (Meet the friends/parents etc.) and how they would react and act during their fake date? lololol

This got pretty long. Happy Valentine’s Day!!

Yoosung:

  • you call him up desperately, telling him your friends have invited you to go out with them on Valentine’s day
  • at first he doesn’t see the problem, but then you explain that they’re all couples
  • you ask him if he’d be okay with pretending to be your boyfriend just for a few hours because you don’t want to feel alone or to get made fun of
  • he’s extremely flustered but agrees to it
  • oh boy is he nervous
  • he really wants to impress your friends and have a good day with you, because he hopes that perhaps if it goes well enough, he can admit his feelings for you….
  • INTERNAL SCREAMING
  • he spends hours preparing, but tries to make it look like he hasn’t
  • he opts for not wearing his hairclips and tries smoothing his hair down as best as he can it doesn’t really work
  • he comes to your doorstep with a bouquet of roses
  • “I-I figured if we’re gonna do this, we should do it properly…?”
  • poor boy is red as a tomato, but you giggle and take the roses
  • when you head to the meeting spot with your friends, they’re already there
  • without thinking, you reach out and grab his hand, lacing your fingers together
  • he is begging himself to just c h i l l
  • he doesn’t remember any of your friends’ names because he’s too caught up in the fact you’re actually holding his hand holy shit
  • you guys go see a movie, and throughout the entire thing he’s trying to work up the courage to reach out and hold your hand again
  • but it’s a romance movie… would that be weird…?
  • oh god he’s overthinking everything
  • eventually the movie ends and he hasn’t worked up the nerve
  • he’s kind of mad at himself
  • your friends all want to go off and do their own thing as couples now, so one of your friends asks you guys what you’re planning on doing for the rest of the day
  • “oh… uh…” Yoosung stammers and blushes like crazy
  • your friends wiggle their eyebrows at you both like oh I see
  • which makes Yoosung blush even harder and get even more flustered
  • he walks you back home because he’s a goddamn gentleman, fake date or not
  • and when you’re standing on the doorstep, he’s not quite sure what to do
  • “I had a really good day” he blurts out
  • “Me too, I think you were pretty believable in your feelings for me! I almost believed it” hahahahahaha Yoosung please get the hint
  • he really wants to kiss you right now, but he’s not sure if the flirty vibes he’s picking up from you are actually just him being hopeful
  • he decides to take a risk
  • “I know this was a fake date and everything, but… I was just wondering if it would be okay if I… kiss you?” he’s stammering and blushing and speaking really fast, and part of him hopes you didn’t understand what he said
  • so when you agree, he’s over the moon
  • “it’s Valentine’s day, after all”
  • he leans in and kisses you softly, trying not to show how much he doesn’t want to stop
  • you say your goodbyes and he heads home
  • as soon as he’s out of sight he fist-pumps and does a little victory dance, which earns him a lot of weird looks from passers by
  • but he couldn’t care less

Zen:

  • when you call him up and tell him your friends are all going on group outing on Valentine’s, and were making fun of you for being alone on Valentine’s Day, he wouldn’t even wait for you to ask, he’d just straight up volunteer
  • this is his chance he’s not gonna miss it
  • he takes it right in his stride and doesn’t appear flustered at all, even if he’s screaming a little on the inside
  • he’s an absolute gentleman, and as soon as he gets to your door he takes your hand and kisses it
  • he claims that because he’s an actor, he’s just immersing himself in the role but he actually just really likes you
  • he’s bought you some chocolates in a heart-shaped box which make you blush like crazy
  • he reaches out to hold your hand as you head to see your friends
  • he absolutely loves this pretense, because it gives him an excuse to do everything he’s wanted to do for such a long time but without it seeming weird
  • as soon as he meets your friends, they’re instantly charmed
  • wow shit is that guy even real ??
  • turns out you guys are going out for a joint romantic meal
  • and Zen is gentleman to the extreme, holding open doors and pulling out your chair for you to the point where it’s like jeez Zen tone it down a little
  • you draw the line when he offers to feed you your food
  • you’re starting to feel like he’s taking the piss, but honestly it’s kind of funny, so you’re giggling a lot which makes his heart leap
  • he loves making you laugh
  • and he wants to make a good impression to your friends, even if he’s pretty confident they like him already
  • he walks you back home afterwards, still holding your hand because “the act hasn’t finished yet”
  • you reach your door and just as your about to open it, he clears his throat
  • you turn around to look at him, and suddenly that confident air has gone and his cheeks are slightly pink and he’s refusing to make eye contact
  • you ask him what’s wrong
  • “I really liked spending Valentine’s day with you” he murmurs, looking at his feet in embarrassment
  • you’ve never seen him so flustered
  • “Oh…” you don’t really know what else to say
  • he eventually looks back up at you “I was wondering if we’d be able to… keep up the act for a few more seconds so I can… kiss you…?”
  • you nod, barely able to believe it
  • he leans in and gently presses his lips against yours, cupping your face in his hands
  • it’s so soft and sweet at totally takes you by surprise
  • eventually he pulls back and is even more flustered than before
  • “Sorry… I, uh, I just… I’ll see you around” he hurries away
  • “Zen!” you call after him, and he turns around nervously, not knowing what you’re going to say. “Call me.”
  • that’s all the confirmation he needs to rush back to you and kiss you again

Jaehee:

  • you call her up one day, a little hysterical, and so she has to help you calm down before she can figure out what’s wrong
  • you tell her that your family have arranged a get-together on Valentine’s day and you can’t bear to sit around while they repeatedly ask why you’re single
  • so, you ask her if she’ll pretend to be your girlfriend, just for a little while to get them off your back
  • she’s impossibly flustered
  • she’s never been in a situation like this before, so she’s not quite sure how to react
  • she thought things like this only happened in movies?
  • but she agrees anyway
  • she’s so nervous, and even though she knows it’s not real, she spends hours getting ready
  • she drinks roughly 8 cups of coffee, which does not help with her nerves
  • big mistake
  • as soon as it’s time, she heads over to your place to pick you up
  • for a moment, she’s blown away by how beautiful you look
  • she knows you always looks beautiful, but today it hits her more than usual because she has to pretend to be your girlfriend oh god
  • she’s brought you a homemade cake that she won’t admit took her four attempts to get perfect
  • you put the cake away and head to your parents’ house
  • she’s so nervous
  • your entire family seems to be here
  • she had no idea families did this kind of thing
  • your grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins… the house is full
  • you never leave her side, and she grips hold of your hand the entire time
  • partly for the act, partly for comfort, mostly just because now she has an excuse
  • naturally, she gets bombarded by nosy family members about her career and intentions towards you
  • she tries her best to keep calm and give the right kinds of answers, but she constantly feels like she’s messing up
  • eventually you can tell she’s starting to get really stressed out as your great aunt drills her about exactly what she’s planning on doing with her life, so you quickly tell everyone it’s time for the two of you to leave because you have plans
  • as soon as you get out the house, you hug her
  • she’s nervous - what if your family sees you?? but then she remembers you’re supposed to be pretending to date anyway
  • she apologises for messing up so badly and you just pull back like
  • what ???
  • she was amazing in there? she put up with all your family’s shit and barely tripped up at all
  • you tell her how amazing she was, and she blushes and shakes her head nervously
  • you smile at her, “walk me home?”
  • you head back to your house and once you’re standing outside the door she’s ready to say goodbye
  • “You know, that cake isn’t going to eat itself” you say casually
  • “Oh, but I… I couldn’t eat it! it’s for you!”
  • you insist on it until she finally agrees to come inside and have a small piece
  • you’re sitting on your sofa eating the cake and she murmurs
  • “I had a really lovely day today, even if it was a little overwhelming”
  • “I did too” you agree
  • she looks up at you for a moment, and barely knows what she’s doing before she’s leaned in to kiss you
  • just as she’s about to pull away and apologise, she feels your arms wrap around her to pull her closer
  • so she allows herself to get lost in the kiss
  • Jaehee has never really been interested in Valentine’s day, but it’s quickly become her favourite day of the year

Jumin:

  • you’re nervous to ask Jumin, because you highly expect he’ll just say Valentine’s day is a meaningless day which symbolises nothing but capitalist consumerism
  • but you have a huge crush on him so you do it anyway
  • when you call him up and mention Valentine’s day, the other end of the line goes quiet
  • you tell him your family are all coming over on Valentine’s day, and you really can’t stand these yearly gatherings that they use as an excuse to harass you about being single
  • after he’s over the initial shock, he agrees surprisingly quickly and you’re just like…oh okay?!
  • when the day arrives he’s nervous, which in itself is strange because he’s never felt quite like this before
  • he knows he gets butterflies around you, but he’s never felt like this
  • he desperately wants to impress your family
  • he shows up at your house earlier than expected, because he wants to arrive before your family do
  • he holds out a small box for you
  • “I thought that, considering I’m technically your date, I should get you something in case your family ask about it”
  • you open the box and inside is a silver heart shaped locket with a…
  • wait Jumin is that a real diamond??
  • you turn around and he puts it on you, trying to stop his fingers shaking while simultaneously trying to touch the skin of your neck as much as possible, enjoying how you shiver at the touch
  • when your family arrive, he turns on his charm
  • they love him
  • you can barely even tell he’s nervous from the way he’s so smooth and confident, answering every question fired his way with surprising ease
  • he takes everything in his stride even when your grandmother asks him whether you guys have ‘made love’ yet oh boy
  • eventually, your family leave
  • almost everyone individually tells you how lovely Jumin is, and how good you guys look together and what a good couple you make
  • you’re just like h a h a I wish
  • when you head back to see him, he looks exhausted
  • “I’m so sorry about all that” you immediately feel the need to apologise. there’s no way he needed to do this at all. you sit next to him, “They really liked you, though”
  • “Really?” he asks, seeming strangely surprised. you nod, and he lets out a breath “I’m glad”
  • you’re not quite sure how to respond, so you sit there in silence for a moment
  • “You look beautiful” he says suddenly, and you look over at him, shocked
  • “Oh… uh, thank you”
  • he reaches out with his hand and strokes your jaw gently
  • “I hope you wouldn’t mind if I…” he trails off and starts leaning towards you
  • oh
  • you respond by leaning in and your lips meet in the middle
  • he’s so soft and tender, which is a side of him you’ve never seen before
  • when he pulls back he says “I would very much like to do that more often, if you would agree to it?”
  • you nod a little breathlessly and he leans in to kiss you again
  • he now understands why people like Valentine’s day so much

707:

  • one day you call him while you’re kind of freaking out
  • once you manage to calm down, you explain to him that your family are having this ‘Valentine’s get-together’ and your grandma kept asking you if you had anyone to bring and you had blurted out ‘yes’ without really thinking about it
  • when you ask him if he’s willing to pretend to be your boyfriend, he’s not quite sure how to react
  • his brain just kind of goes !!!!!!!
  • “It’s only for one day! please, Seven…”
  • okay wow he wouldn’t have expected you to ask him, so he agrees to it
  • “God 707, swooping in to save the day!!!”
  • he’s actually super nervous beforehand
  • even though he knows it isn’t real, his brain is treating it as though it is
  • he desperately tries to prepare his ‘707′ persona so he can hopefully be a little more carefree, but it’s surprisingly difficult today
  • he drives to your house in his favourite babe to pick you up he’s highkey hoping to impress your family with his car
  • when you open the door he bows ridiculously low, holding out a…
  • “Seven, is that a teddy bear?”
  • he hands it to you while grinning and screaming inside oh god why am I such an idiot 
  • it’s a small, brown bear holding a red heart in its paws which has “I love you” written on it
  • he treats it like a joke, telling you to squeeze it
  • you squeeze the heart, and Seven’s voice comes out saying, “Honey, I love you~”
  • he tries to hide how embarrassed he is
  • it’s just a joke it’s just a joke it’s just a joke it’s not a joke
  • he drives you to your grandparent’s house where this is being held
  • when you ask him how he knows where they live he just…
  • oops
  • anyway, you guys head inside, and naturally he instantly gets bombarded with questions and comments about his car, which he is more than happy to talk about
  • whenever someone asks him about how he can afford that at his age he just laughs and brushes it off, saying “If I told you, I’d have to kill you” and things like that
  • he’s really worried he’s coming across as stupid with his weird jokes, but he can’t seem to stop them once they’ve started
  • luckily, you overhear a few family members talking quietly in the kitchen about what a nice guy he is
  • he seems to charm all your female and male relatives to the point where you have to drag him away and tell him to behave because your grandma is 87 years old and married god dammit
  • eventually you both manage to escape the clutches of your family and leave
  • as soon as you’re in the car and out of sight of the house he lets out the biggest sigh ever
  • “Wow, that took a lot out of me.”
  • “Thank you so much for doing that for me. You really didn’t have to.”
  • “No… it’s okay, I actually kind of enjoyed it,” he grins at you, “Kind of sad I didn’t get your grandma’s number.”
  • “She doesn’t have a damn phone”
  • he drops you off at your house and insists on walking you to the door
  • “I really did have a good day. Your family are really nice” he tells you, smiling nervously
  • you decide to invite him inside for a little while, but he declines
  • “I have to pay you back for everything you’ve done!” you insist, “At least let me get you some food or something!”
  • he has a sudden bust of confidence “How about you pay me back… with a kiss? And a promise for a second date”
  • he’s staring at you to gauge your reaction and figure out whether to play this off as a joke
  • but when you blush and stammer, looking down at your feet and nodding, he feels his heart soar
  • he steps towards you, gently taking your hand in his, and you look up at him and he kisses you softly
  • when he pulls back both of you are pretty flustered, but he tries covering it up by smiling and saying “You still owe me a second date, though,” to which you nod enthusiastically and smile back
  • as soon as he gets into his car and is out of sight, he starts laughing almost hysterically and his body shakes with excitement at what just happened
  • he’s never felt as happy as he does right now

Saeran:

  • he’s surprised, to say the least, when he gets a call from you the day before Valentine’s day
  • you frantically tell him the story of how your friends have invited you over on Valentine’s day, he doesn’t see the problem
  • but then you tell him you may have accidentally told them you have a boyfriend, so would he be willing to pretend to be that boyfriend just for the day?
  • firstly, he’ll call you an idiot
  • but then he’ll face the internal conflict of “damn, I really like her and want to do this” and “large crowds of strangers h a h a no”
  • eventually he agrees and wow you’re pretty surprised because you weren’t really expecting him to
  • little do you know that as soon as you guys hang up the phone, he’s straight on his computer researching what people are supposed to even do on Valentine’s day
  • he doesn’t have much time to make a big romantic gesture, and quite frankly he doesn’t really want to because it seems way too much
  • his palms are sweating like crazy as he’s heading to your house, and he’s trying to tell himself to calm down
  • you open up the door and he doesn’t even look you in the eye, he just holds out a single, red rose for you to take
  • “Happy Valentine’s Day” he mumbles, and his cheeks are a little pink with embarrassment
  • you don’t call him out on it
  • you head over to your friend’s house, and find that everyone’s already there
  • he gets really anxious all of a sudden, and reaches out to grab your hand without really thinking about it
  • when you look at him in surprise he tries to play it off as ‘being in character’
  • you do most of the talking, and try directing the conversation away from Saeran as much as you possibly can because you can tell it’s making him uncomfortable
  • he doesn’t let go of your hand the entire time
  • he feels like he’s fucking up really badly, but he can’t bring himself to get involved in the conversation properly
  • little does he know, your friends actually really like him
  • he comes across a little cold, but they tell you in hushed tones as you’re about to leave that they can tell how much he genuinely cares about you
  • you’re kind of like ????
  • you don’t really expect him to walk you home, so you’re surprised when he keeps walking past his road to head to your house
  • you’re still holding hands, and you’re both too nervous to let go also neither of you actually want to
  • when you reach the doorstep he doesn’t make eye contact, he just quickly drops your hand and says goodbye before turning around and walking away
  • you call after him and he turns back around, confused
  • you walk over to him and gently wrap your arms around his shoulders
  • “Thank you.”
  • it takes him a moment to respond, but then he slowly wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you closer
  • after a little while, you pull back and look at each other for a moment
  • he blurts out “Will you go on another date with me?”
  • he blushes and looks down, before murmuring “A real one, I mean”
  • you can barely believe it
  • “Of course!”
  • you carefully kiss him on the cheek and he blushes even harder
  • he responds by kissing you quickly on the cheek too
  • as he’s walking back home, he can feel his cheek tingling where your lips touched it
  • and he feels a genuine smile cross his face for the first time in a long time

V:

  • you call him up one day, and when you tell him you accidentally told your parents you have a boyfriend to bring to their Valentine’s celebration, he laughs
  • no V this is serious
  • he doesn’t need to think twice about agreeing to pretend to be your boyfriend
  • he’s a little nervous though… he doesn’t think he’s the best person for the job, but he’s honoured you asked him
  • he feels as though he should get you something, just to keep up the façade sure V
  • he reaches your door and bows his head, handing you his gift
  • you just stare at it for a moment
  • it’s a charm bracelet you’d commented was pretty once when you’d gone out into town together
  • and he’s even given you a small, camera charm
  • “To remind you of me” he jokes he’s not joking
  • it’s possibly the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever got you
  • this is a fake date…right?
  • not that you’d mind if it were real
  • he holds out his hand, pretending he needs help because of his sight, but he actually just really wants to hold your hand
  • you head to your parents’ house, and he’s trying desperately not to lose his cool
  • when you arrive, your family are instantly charmed
  • they adore him right from the start, and he just seems to fit in so easily
  • you barely even need to worry about leaving him alone in a room with them for a few moments while you go to the bathroom or talk to someone else
  • he’s just really good with people
  • eventually, you leave and your parents make both of you promise you’ll visit again soon
  • as you’re walking back, he holds your hand again
  • “Thank you so much for doing that,” you tell him, and he shakes his head
  • “It was my pleasure. Your family are lovely.”
  • you reach your house again, and your heart is racing
  • so is his
  • you turn to face him and he thanks the lord he wears his glasses, because there’s no way he would be able to maintain his composure and keep eye contact with you
  • “I had a really good day,” you tell him, and he nods.
  • “As did I.”
  • you’re still holding hands, and he squeezes it gently
  • “I don’t suppose…” he stammers for a moment, “Would you mind if I end this day with a kiss?”
  • you don’t reply for a second and he’s like shit did I cross the line?
  • that is, until he feels you shuffling closer to him
  • he leans into you, and your lips meet, taking your breath away
  • he gently cups your face in his free hand, and finally pulls back when he feels as though he wouldn’t be able to control himself any longer
  • “Thank you,” he whispers, “I’ll see you soon?”
  • “Yes,” you whisper
  • he heads back home with the biggest smile on his face
  • Valentine’s Day has never been something he’s enjoyed all that much, but now it has a whole new meaning
Cinderella

Summary: After waking up in the morning finding out you had a one night stand with someone you don’t even know…you rush out as quickly as possible…too bad you forgot your cell phone.

Pairing: Jeon Jeong-guk (Jungkook) / Reader

Genre: Smut

Words: 2k

A/N: extremely Mature rating

Part 2 | Part 3Masterlist


“How do I look?” You asked your best friends.

“Gorgeous.” They said at the same time. You settled on a simple black dress, that hugged your curves beautifully.

“And here.” Your friend Lalisa got up and scrunched up your long hair with her fingers. “Guys like messy.”

“Why are you doing this to me?” It wasn’t your idea to go out in the first place. Your friends thought it would make you feel better, help you move on from your tragic breakup that ended a month ago and you happen to still be hung up on.

Illhoon was the best thing that has ever happened to you and being together for three years, things just weren’t working out. You were always fighting, he was always busy, and you haven’t been sexually active in months. He was always loyal to you, too loyal that he broke things off. He felt bad that he couldn’t give you the love you deserve. He just wasn’t happy, which you respected.

Now your pain in the ass friends were trying to set you up.

“Okay….lets go.” Lalisa marched out and Rosé gave you an apologetic look.

“It will be fun, don’t worry.” She told you.

-

When you got to the club it was surprisingly not that crowded. Which was a relief. “Lets get some fuel.” Lalisa started walking towards the bar.

6 shots later you were starting to get buzzed that you decided to slow down on a casual drink. “Hey.” You looked up following the voice. “Do you see that hot guy over there.” Lalisa pointed with her eyes.

You started to look. “Hey don’t be obvious.” She alerted you.

“Sorry.” You snorted. Maybe the alcohol had kicked in more then you thought.

You slightly looked over, pretending to not be obvious. You saw more then one hot guy, to be honest, but one got your heart racing.

He had dark hair and a killer smile. Possibly one of the most handsome guy you have ever seen. Not counting Illhoon. Shit! You weren’t suppose to be talking about him.

“Go over there and talk to him.” Lalisa pressured you.

“Unless it’s too soon.” Rosé debated.

“No it’s the perfect opportunity….its been long enough…you need to put yourself back out there.” Lalisa argued.

“I’m going over there.” Lalisa stood up. “I’m going to introduce him to you and then I’m going to take his hot friend with the dimples.” Then she stormed off.

As you saw her talking you decided to take about 3 more shots, you were too sober for this.

You saw the guy smile in your direction. “Lalisa always wins.” Rosé said and got up to walk over to one of the other guys.

You were left drinking alone. You didn’t want to act like you were desperate and you weren’t, you wanted to take it at a slow level.

You were slightly drunk that you almost thought the hot guy was walking over.

“Hi.” Oh, it’s real. “I’m Jungkook.” He reached his hand out to you.

“Hi.” You blushed as you stood up, accepting his handshake. “I’m (Y/N).”

“Your friend over there gave a pretty good word for you.”

“What did she say?” You nervously asked.

“She said that I’m an idiot if I don’t talk to you because you are the hottest thing that has ever hit this club.”

You slapped you forehead amused. “I’m so sorry about her.”

“I wouldn’t disagree.” You looked at his sweet smile and blushed.

Your friends were right, you need to let lose, have fun. “Let’s go dance.” You pulled his hand, leading him to the dance floor.

The alcohol took over as you reached the dance floor. You just wanted to have a good time. You felt Jungkook’s hands wrap around your waist as you grinded your hips with his. Your back was rubbing against his chest as you danced in motion.

A few drinks later and a few sexual dances later the rest of the night was all a blur. You knew you wouldn’t remember anything in the morning. You couldn’t remember the fact that you shared an intense kiss.

The second that your lips aligned with his, you were hungry for more. You felt connected with him, but you knew better then to trust the alcohol.

And this case you did. “Do you want to get out of here?” You whispered in his ear.

“Yeah.” Then you don’t even remember getting to his apartment but you got there. As soon as you both tumbled into the door you jumped up wrapping your legs around his waist as he carried you to his bedroom.

He moved down to your neck as soon as your back hit the bed sheets. The sexual tension from each wet kiss had you feeling soaked between your legs.

You heard your phone ring on the table beside you. You couldn’t read the name from your blurry vision, so you tossed it instead.

Jungkook made his way back up to your lips as you felt up the front of his jeans. You attempted to unbutton his belt along with his pants. His hand found itself kneading your chest. You couldn’t help but moan, it’s been a while since you have been touched like this.

You slid your hand underneath his boxers, touching up his sensitive area. The area was tight from his hard-on.

You flipped you both over so you can pull down your dress, leaving you in your bra and underwear. You finished pulling down his pants, exposing his length. Wow. Again, the alcohol bringing out the sweet girl you tried to convince yourself to be.

You grabbed his length kissing the red tip. You loved the sound that escaped his mouth as you started to lick down his area. You couldn’t help but smirk from the thought that you were in control. You made your way back up to the tip leaning your head down to take him fully into your mouth. You bobbed your head up and down sucking every inch of his throbbing member.

You sat back up letting go of him you didn’t want him to take all the fun. You wrapped your arms around your back to unhook your bra and then you slid your underwear off sexually.

He sat up looking at you with desire in his eyes. You bit your lip as you watched him take off his clothes. He was extremely fit. You slid yourself down onto him, surprised by the sudden pain.

You rocked your hips back and forth taking in the pleasure that you desperately needed. You moaned as he worked against you. He grabbed a hold of your hips moving you quicker then you can handle.

You screeched in surprise when he flipped you both over as he took control. He lifted your right leg up onto his left shoulder to deepen the angle. You loved how attractive he was even though he was sweaty.

You felt your toes go numb as your orgasm immerse throughout your body. You squeezed your eyes shut trying to pass through the feeling. Jungkook’s pace slowed down immensely as you felt him jerk his liquid into you. He kissed you passionately before he collapsed on the bed next to you. After that you let the sleep get a hold of you.

-

Your eyes fluttered open as the killer headache flooded your skull. You yawned sitting up when you realized you didn’t recognize the room. You took in your surroundings as yours eyes drifted off to the sleeping beauty next to you. The last thing you remember was dancing with him. Oh shit! What have you done?

You slowly got up trying not to wake what’s his name. Jungkook? You tried to remember. As soon as your feet hit the floor you reached for your underwear and dress. You grabbed your heels, tip toeing your way out of his room. Damn he was beautiful but one night stands are always awkward, that’s why it’s best to sneak out.

On your way out you saw a sweater pulled over a chair. You know you shouldn’t but you took it to at least to save your dignity. When you made your way onto the streets it was way too familiar. This was your street. You only had to walk down a few blocks to reach your apartment. The sweater covering you didn’t have an affect, people still stared at you. Judging you.

When you got home your roommate was in the kitchen.

“Oh my god there you are.” Rosé panicked. “I tried calling you.”

You stopped in front on the mirror making your way to the kitchen. Your makeup was running down your face and your hair was a mess. No wonder everyone was staring.

“Wow you bad girl.” Rosé smirked at you. “You and Lalisa ditching me to go have sex.” She pouted.

“Other then you two I had a nice sober talk with a sweet guy named Jin.”

“That’s nice.” You grabbed the aspirin.

“Anyways….what happened?”

“I don’t remember.” You groaned.

You went to sit comfortably on the couch. Rosé followed you with an ice cold pack.

“I snuck out before I could ask.” You confessed.

“Well maybe you’ll see him again.”

“Maybe….we better call Lalisa to see if shes okay.” You suggested.

“I already did…but both of you ignored my calls.” Rosé intrigued.

You felt the pockets of the sweater, feeling for your phone. It wasn’t there. You got up following your steps to the door where your purse was. You dug through it rapidly trying to find your phone.

“Fuck.” You said panicked “fuck, fuck, fuck.” You got up.

“What?” Rosé rushed to you.

“I forgot my phone.”

-

A few hours later you were still panicked. “What am I going to do?”

“I told you already.” Rosé said annoyed.

Both your eyes made their way towards the door as it opened. Lalisa made her way through with a big smile on her face. “What’s up?” She said casually.

“Where the fuck were you?” Rosé sat up annoyed. “I’ve trying calling you all day.”

“Sorry I was out.” She made her way towards her room. Then she came back out with a bathrobe getting ready for a shower. “I had the best time last night.” She smiled. “I think I’ll stick around with this one.” The thing with Lalisa was she would hook up with guys until she found one she liked.

“He’s so cute and he has like the perfect body, nice and tall, lean.” She blushed. “We had like the best morning sex and then he bought me out for breakfast.”

“Anyway what about you? I saw you guys last night, I almost thought you were going to go at it in the dance floor.” She laughed.

You just sighed. “What’s wrong?” Lalisa asked.

“This whole thing makes me uncomfortable, sleeping with someone I just met….I don’t even remember him that much, just his face.”

“Well maybe if you didn’t sneak out maybe you could get to know him.” Rosé said.

“You snuck out….oh (Y/N)….that’s going to give him the wrong idea and now you’ll probably never see him again.” Lalisa said disappointed.

“She’s going to have too.” Rosé spoke for you.

Lalisa looked at you both. “I forgot my phone.” You said trying to stay calm.

-

“What if he answers?”

“That’s what we want doofus.” Rosé stated.

“I’ll just buy a new phone.” You turned away.

“No you wont.” Lalisa pulled you back.

“Call.” Rosé handed you her phone.

You nervous dialed your phone number. You brought it up to your ear. Your heart started beating quickly as you heard the phone ringing. Lalisa and Rosé were hanging on each shoulder listening.

“Hello.” You heard his cute voice.

“H-hi.” You nervously stuttered.

“(Y/N)?” He remembered your name?

“Hi….um…you have something that belongs to me.”

He laughed. “That’s funny because I believe you have something that belongs to me.”

It took you a few to understand what he meant, but then it occurred to you. You stole his sweater.

-

Masterlist | Part 2 | Part 3