but i feel it holds up pretty well

Gold (Prinxiety)

Title: Gold

Pairing: Roman x Virgil

Summary: Virgil is feeling worthless and Roman tries to cheer him up.

Warning: self-hatred

A/N: Based on Gold by Owl City! I’m pretty content (like a panda bear) on how this turned out!

~~~~~~~~

What was the point? Why did he even try? Everyone still hated him. It had been less than a month since he tried to leave. And less than a week since he and Roman got together. But here he was, feeling worthless and unloved. Because that’s all he really was.

Virgil finally allowed the tears that had welled up in his eyes to fall, unable to hold them back any longer. He whimpered softly, trying to muffle the sound of his crying by tucking his face between his knees and chest.

Not long after, there was a knock at the door.

“Virgil? Dear, are you alright?” a familiar voice asked. He knew immediately it was Roman. Virgil didn’t respond. “I’m coming in, okay?” The door slowly opened and Virgil just stared at it, waiting to see Roman step through and see how pathetic he really was.

But when Roman saw Virgil, his face showed no sign of resentment, but rather pure concern. Roman rushed over to Virgil, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug.

“What’s wrong, my love?” Roman asked, wiping his boyfriend’s tears away with his thumb.

“I don’t… I don’t deserve you…” Virgil croaked, deciding it was useless to hide anything. “I’m worthless and you deserve someone better.” Roman’s heart broke at these words. To him, Virgil was the most amazing thing ever. Despite the endless banter that they had before, he sincerely cared for Virgil. It just took a while for him to realize it.

Sighing, he leaned closer to Virgil, once again wrapping him in a tight hug. He dug his face in the crook of his neck and started singing softly.

“Stand on up and take a bow. There’s something there and it’s showing. There’s no need to look around. You’re the best we got going,” Roman sang quietly. Virgil pulled back, a confused expression on his face. Roman just smiled, caressing the anxious boy’s face with his hands.

“Shout out to the dreams you’ll chase. Shout out to the hearts you’ll break. Nothing’s gonna stop you now. I guess you better be going,” he continued. “You’ll never be far, I’m keeping you near. Inside of my heart, you’re here. Go on, it’s gotta be time. You’re starting to shine.” Roman held out his hand toward Virgil, who took it hesitantly. He pulled him and started guiding him around in a little dance, spinning and twirling him as he sang.

“'Cause what you got is gold. I know you’re gold. Oh, I know, I know. I don’t need the stars in the night, I found my treasure. All I need is you by my side, so shine forever. Gold, I know, you’re gold. Oh, I know, you’re gold,” he sang, a little louder and more confidently. A very small smile began to form on Virgil’s lips.

“It won’t take you long to get when you feel like you’re soaring. So write it all and don’t forget, you gotta tell us your story. Shout out to the friends back home. Shout out to the hearts you’ve known. You gave them nothing but the best, yeah. And you can tell them your story.”

“You’ll never be far, I’m keeping you near. Inside of my heart, you’re here. Go on, it’s gotta be time. You’re starting to shine,” Roman continued. “'Cause what you got is gold, I know, you’re gold. Oh, I know, I know. I don’t need the stars in the night, I found my treasure. All I need is you by my side, so shine forever. Gold, I know, you’re gold. Oh, I know, you’re gold.”

Roman spun his boyfriend out and then back in, holding him close as he began the last chorus, meaning every word of it.

“'Cause what you got is gold, I know, you’re gold. Oh, I know, I know. I don’t need the stars in the night, I found my treasure. All I need is you by my side, so shine forever. Gold, I know, you’re gold. Oh, I know, you’re gold. You’re gold. You’re gold,” he finished, leaning in to kiss Virgil, who was smiling now.

“I love you so much,” Roman mumbled.

“I love you too,” Virgil said, finally feeling the love he deserved to have.

~~~~~~~~

Please like/reblog/leave feedback!

~Amanda/August

anonymous asked:

What's your opinion on a 3 way ship (otp3 I think it's called?) between mob, deku, and shouto?

short answer: yes

long answer: ok ive honestly already thought abt this and ive had to retype this like 3 times now bc i could honestly gush abt this idea all damn day. dekumob & tododeku are pretty tied up in being my favorite deku ship and i can easily see shouto & mob getting along really well. i feel like they would all balance each other out well and like, imagining little things with them is super cute. deku will carry both of them at the same time (he carries mob whenever hes tired from working out and will just randomly pick up shouto). shouto is 5′9 and mob is 5′2 and frankly, thats adorable (deku rests about in the middle at 5′5). shouto holds their hands all the time no matter what, even if theres supposed to be no pda during school hours. if theyre all in a cuddle mood someone is guaranteed to be sprawled out in the others laps. 

i think tododekumob would be a good name for it

Why Magical Girls Are Never Attacked During A Transformation

As some of you might already have guessed, I’m a fan of Japanese girl idols. One of the many, many idol groups in existence today in Japan is NMB48, a Osaka-based spin-off group of the (in)famous AKB48. NMB has a weekly show that’s surprisingly entertaining as well as educational called NMB to Manabu-kun, in which the members of NMB and a few comedians listen to guest lectures by experts in various fields.

Back on May 15th, the theme of the episode was pataphysics/the science of sci-fi. One of the topics of the lecture held by university professor Yanagita Rikao was the age-old question of “WHY ARE MAGICAL GIRLS NEVER ATTACKED WHILE TRANSFORMING???”

This was his answer, based on the magical girl series Futari wa Pretty Cure.

Question: The transformation scenes in Pretty Cure are very long, so why don’t the bad guys attack the girls in the meantime?

“Even when I was little, I was thinking ‘Hey! Attack them now!’”

“I found this odd as well, so I watched the transformation scene many times. And what I noticed is, when the Pretty Cures yell 'Dual Aurora Wave!’ and transform, a rainbow-colored column of light shoots up from the ground, going BOOM!”

“And then the Pretty Cures levitate, and go up into the air. Based on this, I believe the protagonists of Pretty Cure are being held up in the air by the power of light.”

“When we think of light, we usually think it heats up things or lights up things. But in reality, light has the power to hold up things as well.”

“When the sun is beating down on us in the summer, the human body is being pressed downwards by the sun beams with a force of 2/100,000g.”

“But this is only about a one-hundred of the weight of a mosquito, so no matter how hot it is, we don’t feel that sunlight is heavy.”

“So that means the light holding them up must be extremely strong. If we assume that the two Pretty Cures each weigh about 45kg and do some calculations…”

“It means the light during the transformation must have the energy of 2,100,000,000kW per 1m2.”

“While the entirety of power that Japan is capable of generating is only 100,000,000kW.”

“So they’re using 21 TIMES the amount of energy the whole of Japan can generate.”

“So what would happen if a bad guy jumped in to try to sabotage their transformation?”

“He would EVAPORATE INSTANTLY.”

DEATH AWAITS ANYONE WHO DARES TO DISRUPT A PRETTY CURE TRANSFORMATION.

“So this means the best thing to do would be to transform close to any bad guys.”

“Yes. They are the strongest while they transform, and are practically invincible.”

i need me some jealous kara in my life, so of course i did what any person would’ve done and came with a bunch of headcanons to satisfy my own needs because that’s what self care is all about.

  • it all starts one afternoon, they’re downtown in one of lena’s favorite restaurants and kara’s talking excitedly about the new article she’s writing when lena’s phone goes off. usually when they’re together lena ignores it, she always says it’s business associates and insists they can wait but this time lena sees the name on the screen and smiles widely, “oh it’ll be just a minute kara, sorry” kara nods, motions her to go ahead and tries to focus on her pasta until she hears lena giggling “i can’t wait to see you! it’s been, what? six years?” something inside kara twitches. who is she talking to? most importantly who is making her smile like that?! that’s usually her thing. lena keeps talking to whoever is at the other end of the line as if she’s not there, beaming, chuckling… kara’s always believed herself to be someone non violent (for most the time) but she’s now wishing she could grab lena’s phone, throw it to the ground and break it.
  • turns out, lena says to her when they’re on the car ride back to l–corp, that one of her dearest friends from boarding school is planning a visit to national city and called her to see if they could get together, “her name is molly, we were together on science club and we hit it off right away,” kara knows it’s irrational to feel so… heated at the thought of lena hanging out with someone else because damn, she’s her own person and she’s allowed to have as many friends as she’d like but… it makes her extremely uncomfortable to think about lena laughing with someone that is not her. “i have to admit i had a little bit of a crush on her when we were younger,” and kara doesn’t know molly, has never seen her and certainly has no interest in doing it so but she already hates her.
  • “and then she said,” it’s game night, james and winn have paused mortal kombat to listen to her angry rant and alex is staring at her with wide eyes, beer in hand. “oh i used to have a crush on her, as if it’s the most trivial thing on the universe, did you know she was supposed to come tonight? i promised i would let her win at mario kart, but no! molly’s plane lands today and she called to say—i’m so sorry kara, i can’t make it, i’m gonna go pick her up, maybe some other time? can’t molly call herself an uber? does she really need to have lena’s attention all to herself? gosh it makes me so upset someone would be so selfish.” winn opens and closes his mouth a few times, not sure if he should say anything about the whole situation, james and alex are looking at each other, silently deciding on who should be the first to talk until finally alex breaks the silence. “kara… you don’t even know this molly person, didn’t you also say her and lena hand’t seen each other for years? it’s normal that they want to spend time with each other, catch up with what’s been going on in their lives.” kara crosses her arms over her chest and angrily stares out the window, she wants to bury her face on ice cream because though she knows alex is right she still wants to deck molly in the face.
  • lena is never late, if anything she’s always early to arrive to their lunch dates, but for the first time in months, lena luthor is fifteen minutes late and kara’s getting impatient, maybe she got caught up on work and didn’t see the hour, maybe she had to sign some contracts before leaving, maybe… maybe… she tries and call her twice but she doesn’t answer and that’s when kara gets worried, what if something happened to her? what if while she was on her way someone stopped her and hurt her? she’s tempted to alert the deo, tell them to search for lena’s location when she enters the restaurant a little breathless and with her hair disheveled. “kara i am sorry!” she sits down across from her and takes out her coat, “molly came over to my office and we started to talk, i didn’t mean to keep you waiting.” kara’s face goes dark. it’s wednesday, this is supposed to be their day, their afternoon, their time to be with one another without people interrupting and of course molly had to come and ruin it. “did you know molly has a motorbike? she dropped me off!” oh amazing, molly owes a motorbike, so does half the population of national city, she’s nothing especial. kara doesn’t feel like eating anymore and ends up leaving early. 
  • she’s punching one of the walls at the deo repeatedly, each punch harsher than the last. her knuckles feel on fire but it’s working wonders to get her mind off lena and her new best friend molly whom today decided to invite her to the beach. “what is wrong with her?” winn whispers to alex almost scared of kara’s sudden display of anger, alex shrugs and tell him she has no idea since kara refuses to talk with anyone about it. “she’s jealous,” j’onn says without looking up from the file he’s holding and both of them open their mouths in surprise. “psychic, remember?” 
  • “have i done something to upset you?” lena asks with her cheeks red in embarrassement and her voice breaking, “you’ve been avoiding me for weeks, yesterday you cancelled our lunch date because you said you had a lot of stuff to do but then you uploaded a picture on instagram with james in your pajamas eating popcorn. look kara, i know we all need our space sometimes but i’d rather hear the truth than finding out via social media that you’re lying to me.” she sounds so hurt and she’s almost on the verge of tears, kara feels awful she didn’t mean to make her feel bad, she was just tired of hearing her talk about molly and how amazing she was every single time they got together. “you want the truth?” lena nods eagerly and kara tries, she does, to keep her composure when she catches the necklace lena’s wearing… gold with rose pendant. “that is pretty,” she points to it and lena grabs it between her hands, “thank you! molly gave it to me yesterday.” kara feels her fist tighten. 
  • “well the truth is that molly is annoying,” she says standing up from her place and lena’s eyes widen. “yes, she’s annoying and she’s keeping you all to herself. it’s almost as she’s holding you captive! she’s taking you to the beach and to that art gallery i was going to take you, you are eating potstickers with her, lena, that’s our thing!” there’s no going back now… “and she’s… she’ probably ugly too—oh she has a motorcycle, how original! you know what lena, i can fly! i could fly you from here to paris in less than an hour, i bet molly can’t do that. you know what else i can do? lift you up, with one finger probably, can molly lift you up? no i don’t think she can. does she let you win at mario kart?! she doesn’t, huh, does she even know how to play mario kart, does she?!” 
  • lena looks at her in disbelief before she bursts out laughing and kara lets out a groan, “it’s not funny lena! i am much more interesting that molly will ever be and i’m—mphm!” lena’s kissing her, her cold hands are tangling themselves in her hair and she’s pulling her impossibly close and kara feels like she’s floating. for the first three seconds she doesn’t respond, but as soon as lena slips a warm tongue into her mouth her body reacts and she’s grabbing her everywhere. her face, her neck, her waist, her ass, lena gasps and they break apart. “sorry, i didn’t mean to… i just wanted to… you see this wasn’t what i had planned,” kara looks to the ground but it’s not for long because lena is grabbing her chin, making her look into her eyes and she melts. 
  • “love… i can’t believe you were jealous of molly.” kara clicks her tongue almost offended, she was not jealous of molly, she’s about to say it, to assure lena she doesn’t feel such childish emotion when lena gives her a small peck on the lips and her train of thought is stopped. “she’s married… and has two kids!” kara wants to hide under lena’s desk for the rest of the evening.

Show Me That You Love Me

(ao3, buzzfeed article that inspired this nonsense)

(Monday, Feb 6)

Clarke: FYI, I’m telling my coworkers that we’re dating so this creep will stop hitting on me
AT WORK

Bellamy: You can’t just leave it at that.
How creepy are we talking?  
You know if I don’t get specifics my mind jumps straight to the worst-case scenario.

Clarke: It’s not that big a deal? Mostly just annoying
But he won’t take no for an answer so I told him I had a boyfriend

Bellamy: Not a girlfriend?

Clarke: They know I’m bi already because I ranted about gross stereotypes at the Christmas party
It’s why they instituted a two-drink limit
And if he doesn’t respect my hard “no” I doubt he’ll respect my girlfriend’s so
Boyfriend

Bellamy: You sure you don’t want to date him? He sounds like a charmer.

Clarke: I was sure the first fifteen times he asked and my decision hasn’t wavered.
I wouldn’t have even mentioned it to you except I know Anya comes to the bar sometimes and I didn’t want you to blow my cover

Bellamy: Consider your cover secure.

Clarke: Thanks. I owe you one.

Bellamy: What are fake boyfriends for?

* * *

(Wednesday, Feb 8)

Clarke: WTF???

Bellamy: I see you got my flowers.

Clarke: They’re hard to miss seeing as they take up MY WHOLE CUBICLE
It smells like a rainforest
My allergies are killing me
Seriously. Why.

Bellamy: Can’t I just show my fake girlfriend that I appreciate her?
Why must you always assume I have ulterior motives?

Clarke: Because I know how expensive flowers can be and you’re the biggest coupon-clipping Scrooge I know

Bellamy: I’m helping!
I’m just trying to back up your story, Princess.

Clarke: You’re just trying to embarrass me in front of my coworkers is what you’re doing

Bellamy: Remember that time you made me do karaoke with you?
Some might consider us even now.

Clarke: You know Valentine’s Day is next week right? If you do something like this on a random Wednesday, you’re going to have to do something for that too or else Cage will think we’ve broken up

Bellamy: So I’m going to have to top myself is what you’re saying.

Clarke: I don’t think that’s what I said at all

Bellamy: If you insist, Princess.

Clarke: I don’t insist. I STRONGLY DO NOT INSIST.

Bellamy: Unrelated question: what song would you most like to have serenaded to you?

Clarke: If that’s how it’s gonna be then start preparing yourself
Cause it’s on, Blake

Bellamy: Dammit, I did not think this through.

Keep reading

Never Have I Ever

“Never have I ever been to Taco Bell.” Every other player except Ethan put down a finger.

“What??” Mark yelled in response, causing Ethan to flinch. “How have you never had Taco Bell?”

“I just haven’t,” Ethan explained with a small laugh. Mark just shook his head in disappointment and let the game continue. He was really just upset that he was losing. Ethan still had up 5 fingers, Ty had 6 left, but Mark was down to 2.

“Never have I ever dated a guy,” Tyler said. Ethan and Ty both left up all fingers while Mark was forced to put one down.

“It was for a month!” Mark said angrily, causing the other two boys to laugh. “Fine, you wanna be a dick, two can play at that game! Never have I ever had a kidney transplant!”

“You fucking dick,” Ty muttered under his breath while putting down a finger. Mark just gave him a sly smirk before gesturing to Ethan to continue the game.

“Never have I ever had a crush on a YouTuber,” Eth said with a sly smile, knowing he was knocking Mark out of the game.

“You fucking bitch! Fuck you!” Mark yelled at Ethan. It was all in good fun, which meant Eth was busting up laughing at how angry the older man got. Mark got up and went to the kitchen to grab some snacks, leaving Eth and Ty to finish the game. Eth looked at Ty waiting for him to take his turn when he noticed something odd.

“Ty, don’t you have 5 fingers left? You were beating me,” Eth asked confused.

“Well I WAS a minute ago,” Ty replied, joking condescension clear in his voice.

“What? Oh wait, you…wait a fucking minute!” Eth said, not understanding at first.

“Shut up Eth,” Ty said, knowing where the conversation was heading.

“You’ve had a crush on a YouTuber?? What? When? Who? Why didn’t I know this? Do I know them?” Ethan rambled on until Ty covered his mouth with his rather large hands.

“Eth, if you don’t stop talking, I will shove a peanut down your throat,” Ty threatened before letting his grip loosen and removing his hand.

“We don’t even have any peanuts in the house you big bully,” Ethan said with mock sadness, putting on his best sad puppy dog face, to which Tyler just rolled his eyes and laughed. “But really, you have to tell me.”

“I’m not telling you,” Ty said firmly, but smiling.

“But Tyyllleeeeeeerrrrrrr,” Ethan drew out the name while clinging on to his arm, “You have to tell me!”

“I’m not telling you!” Ty said again, a little more forcefully. “It’s really nothing anyways, no big deal.”

“It’s? as in It IS? As in CURRENT?” Eth asked.

“No, I mean…it wasn’t…or…it is? I don’t even know,” Ty replied sounding exasperated.

“Well do you like them or not?” Ethan asked in a more serious tone. He really wanted to help his friend sort out his feelings.

Ty glanced up at Ethan for a second, making eye contact with the blue boy before answering, “Yeah. I really think I like him. A lot.”

Eth felt a blush creeping up on his cheeks. He knew Ty wasn’t talking about him, but either way, he still could hold on to that last shred of hope of Ty returning his feelings. “Well then maybe you should just go for it. Message them and ask them to go get dinner sometime or something,” Eth offered his advice. “Do they live around here? I guess I should have asked that before saying you should get dinner,” he added awkwardly.

“Yeah, they live pretty close by. You think I should go for it?” Ty asked, sounding more insecure than Eth had ever heard him say.

“Definitely,” Ethan said. He really wanted Ty to find someone, even if it meant Ty didn’t return his feelings.

“I think I will. I’ll message him right now.” Ty said, picking up his phone. That seemed to be the end of that conversation, so Ethan stood up and headed downstairs to the living room where he found Mark watching TV. He sat down on the couch and pulled out his phone to check twitter when he noticed a text.

‘Hey, I think you’re pretty cute. Wanna have dinner sometime? -Ty :)’

Ethan couldn’t help but blush and chuckle a bit to himself before sending a reply.

‘Get down here you doof so I can kiss you <3’


~~~~~~~~~

I know this is a pretty cliche storyline, but oh well. I didn’t see one for this ship so I figured might as well. Hope you liked it!

The Friendly Wager (Part 4)

Summary: AU. Reader and Bucky Barnes are neighbors and best friends. After yet another bad date, reader comes home to find Bucky with his typical weekend target. They decide to make a wager about dating, but is there more on the line than reader cares to admit?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 2,578

Warnings: language, fluff, sarcasm, unrealized romantic tension, drinking

A/N: This is my submission for the lovely Kait’s ( @bionic-buckyb) 5k AU Challenge. Congrats on the followers, friend! My prompt was “Can you please come over so I don’t feel so alone?

I’m really behind on posting my parts for this challenge, I’ve got a long weekend, I wanna move this along because I’m dumb and entered another challenge, and I don’t wanna be a PIA for Kait, so I’m posting more frequently. Tags are closed.

Part 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5

Originally posted by dailyevanstan

Keep reading

it’s friday afternoon and they’re not going out later, not going to any party. they’re back at isak’s place after school and getting changed into something more comfortable, even picking something from one of isak’s drawers. and when isak takes his shirt off, even calls him “hey, isak!” and isak looks up and even pokes his belly button and isak jerks back, half gasping, half laughing and he says “oh, really?” and even wiggles his eyebrows and tries to reach for his belly button again, but this time isak is quick to make a step back, and another one when even tries to reach him again, and he asks “is this war?” and even shrugs, an amused smile on his face and he replies “maybe”. and that’s how even ends up capturing isak with his arms just a minuter later, that’s how they end up on isak’s bed, that’s how they end up kissing and laughing and kissing again 

after a little while, even asks isak “i haven’t seen eskild in a bit, what’s up with that?” and isak tells him “oh, yeah. one of his co-worker has been sick this week or something so he had to fill in for him. he’s like, been working non-stop” and even seems to think for a second before he says “i think we should do something nice for him. like, food and clean up a little? what do you think?” and isak looks up at him, his chin resting on even’s chest, a small smile across his lips and he says “you know you’re like the best person i know?” and he means it, from the bottom of his heart 

“i think eskild became a vegetarian a few weeks ago, so we have to make something without meat. pasta?” even lets out a chuckle, tells isak “we’re not making pasta isak, that’s all you guys eat around here” and isak replies “that’s not true!” and then he also lets out a chuckle, adds “i mean, it’s a little true.” even opens the fridge and looks around. “hmm, you know, once i had this tofu stir-fry with veggies, it was goooood” and isak says “sounds fancy. i trust your judgment” and even gives him a peck on the cheek, replies “you better”. and then they go to the grocery store, because there’s no tofu in the fridge, and the only vegetable they have is half a head of broccoli. isak puts a bag of chips and a bag of sweets in the cart, says “i mean, eskild loves chips and candies. plus, they’re vegetarian” and evens laughs and shakes his head. “i’m sure eskild will appreciate the thought” 

and so they make the stir fry. isak cuts the vegetables and the tofu into cubes, poking at the tofu, a questioning look on his face and he says “i’ve never had tofu before” and even tells him “it can be really yummy when cooked right.” even starts cooking, tosses the food around in the pan a couple of times, like he’s done this hundreds of times. when the food is done, he grads a fork, picks a piece of tofu and red pepper, gently blows on it and brings it to isak’s mouth. and isak eats the bite and nods in approval. “’ery ‘ood”. and then they quickly do the dishes, and at some point isak places his wet and slightly cold hand under even’s shirt, on the small of his back, and even starts a little in surprise, and isak tells him teasingly “revenge for earlier”

they put three plates on the table, the pan in the middle, and eskild arrives soon later, they hear him open the door. they also hear him walk toward the kitchen and say “oh wow, it smells good in here” and when eskild peaks his head into the kitchen, isak exclaim “tadaaa!” gesturing toward the table with his arms extended wide. and eskild simply stands there, and it takes him a second before he says “oh my god, you made this?” and isak tells him “well, even made this” and even wraps his arm around isak’s waist, says “isak totally helped me, it was teamwork”. and eskild looks a little tired but his smile is totally sincere and then he walks toward them, wraps an arm around each of them and they both hug him back and eskild sighs and says “you boys are the best” and isak tells him “well, you’re pretty great, too” and eskild ruffles his hair as he says “well thank you, baby jesus”

and they all sit and eat diner, and isak and even are holding hands on the table as eskild tells them about his day, about this cute guy he met at work and his annoying boss. he asks them about their week, says “i feel like i haven’t seen you guys in a week. i mean, i think i literally haven’t seen you guys in a week” and he lets out a little laugh and yawns. after a short while he ends up looking at his watch and saying “i think my wild and young days are over, i’m going to go to bed at nine on a friday night” he stands up and stretches out his limbs, and then gives each of them a long kiss on the cheek, says “thank you, thank you again. appreciate this a lot, boys” and isak laughs and wipes his cheek, says “you’re welcome, eskild, good night, sleep well”. and when eskild goes to his room, isak takes even’s hand and brings it to his face, plants little kisses on his palm and on each of his fingers, asks “dishes, then movie in my room?” and even smiles and nods, repeats “dishes, then movie in your room”

anonymous asked:

In the post where you were talking about banter requests, I loved your ideas for Cullen/Alistair conversations. Would you mind actually writing out that one?

Set in DAI, assuming the two of them are actively traveling with the Inquisitor at the same time.


Alistair: So… It’s been… what? Ten years or so? Glad to see you’re doing better than the last time we crossed paths.
Cullen: No.
Alistair: No? You’re not doing better?
Cullen: No, I mean… I don’t… I would rather not talk about Kinloch.
Alistair: Oh.
Cullen: Sorry. I just-
Alistair: No, you’re right. That was a bit of an asinine thing to bring up, huh?
Cullen: The night your companion arrived at Ferelden’s Circle was easily the worst of my life. I was… not in my right mind.
Alistair: Right. Sorry. Shouldn’t have… You know what? Forget I said anything.


Cullen: Maker, you’re joking.
Alistair: Honest truth of Andraste.
Cullen: It talked? And moved?!
Alistair: Yep. Quite fond of moving, actually. And crushing things. Big fan of crushing things. Birds, especially.
Cullen: And it was conscious the whole time? Watching us?
Alistair: That’s what Shale said. It’s name is Shale, by the way. Did I already mention that?
Cullen: Shale… Maker, I used to climb that thing when I was a boy.
Alistair: Awkward. Probably means Shale was the first woman you ever mounted.
Cullen: What?
Alistair: (laughs) Oh, if only you could see your face right now.


Alistair: Is it just me, or did I do really miserably in that last fight?
Cullen: It’s not just you.
Alistair: (sarcastically) Oh ha ha.
Cullen: Are you injured?
Alistair: No. Just my shoulder. Eventually it will let me know if I can lift my arm above my head again. 
Cullen: Your shield form needs correcting, then. You shouldn’t be feeling it in your shoulder unless you were bracing it into your body. You should hold it higher so the force of the blow lands on your forearm-
Alistair: Ugh. You sound like the Ser Rowald.
Cullen: Who?
Alistair: The Templar I trained under. Or, one of them, anyway. Hold your shield up, Alistair. Stop leaving your side open, Alistair. Don’t block things with your face, Alistair.
Cullen: Maybe you should have listened to him.
Alistair: Well, I’ve made it this far, haven’t I? And I’ve still got a pretty face to show for it. Take that, Rowald.


Cullen: You left the order before taking your vows?
Alistair: I didn’t leave so much as I was recruited. Duncan… the Warden-Commander… he visited the monastery in Bournshire where I was in training. The grand cleric put on a heck of a show for him - paraded us around, made us fight one another. The boy I was paired with, Ferrald - he was older than me. Already knighted. I know for a fact they put me against him to let him show off and he made good on it - all but wiped the floor with me. (chuckles) I would have paid good coin to see the look on the grand cleric’s face when Duncan said he wanted me for the Wardens. Apparently he tried to forbid it until Duncan invoked the Right of Conscription.
Cullen: He must have really had his mind set on you. Did he ever tell you why?
Alistair: No. Not really, anyway. (quieter) I wish I still had the chance to ask him.


Cullen: Do you regret it?
Alistair: Well that’s a good conversation starter. Lots of things I regret… like going back for a second cheese pie at lunch. My stomach’s not too happy with that choice.
Cullen: I meant your conscription. Being forced to serve the Wardens.
Alistair: Oh Maker, no. I never wanted to be a Templar. I was handed off to them because a certain someone wanted the local bastard to be a bit more out of sight, out of mind - if you catch my meaning. I hated it. Once I witnessed my first Harrowing… that sort of sealed the deal for me. I didn’t ever want to be put in that position again.
Cullen: I take it the mage didn’t survive?
Alistair: That’s usually what happens when you’re forced to run them through with a sword.
Cullen: I’m… sorry.
Alistair: It’s probably easier, if you go into it truly believing you’re doing the right thing.
Cullen: Speaking from experience - it shouldn’t ever be easy. If it is, then you have a far greater problem on your hands.


Alistair: Are you feeling alright? You look a bit green in the gills.
Cullen: I’ll be fine.
Alistair: Withdrawal getting to you again? I remember feeling certain… urges, when I stopped taking it. But I didn’t use lyrium long enough for the addiction to set in. Only a few doses in training.
Cullen: Consider yourself lucky, then.


[tag for more original banter]

Being in a polygamous relationship with Tom Holland and Harrison Osterfield would include

Originally posted by starkquinzel

  • your parents being shocked and feeling weird, at the beginning 
  • watching them while they’re working out 
  • them pulling out poses whenever they catch you staring
  • always spoiling you with gifts
  • traveling together 
  • weekly movie nights
  • fighting about what movie to watch
  • you always end up being the winner
  • them pouting and looking cute af 
  • you being the one in the middle every time you cuddle   
  • silly pics 
  • always posting pretty pictures of you on Insta
  • with cute little captions
  • them being possessive over you
  • always needing to have some kind of physical contact with you
  • Tommy likes holding your hand
  • Haz prefers having his arm around your waist
  • both of them being very protective of you, as well (Like no one can flirt or touch you (especially in an intimately way) or worse hurt you) (Honestly I feel bad for the ones that hurt you… They would knock him down, and if it was a girl hurting you… They would be pretty rude) 
  • sometimes they will compete against each other (even tho you love both) 
  • listening to music together (after a lot of arguing because of the different music tastes) 
  • making lovey-dovey playlists for each other
  • skinny dipping
  • playing video games together (or just watching them) 
  • whenever you’re playing with them, they always lose so that you’ll be happy
  • you being the price every time they’re playing against each other 
  • It may end up with the three of you 
  • taking bubble baths together
  • eskimo kisses
  • knowing their twitter passwords and tweeting random stuff from their accounts
  • fangirling over celebrities together
  • “OMG i’d so make out with Chris Evans!”
  • “same”
  • reading fanfics together whenever you’re bored
  • food fights
  • adopting a parrot together
  • naming it RDJ
  • teaching it to speak
  • “RDJ, say “a$$hole”
  • their families adoring you
  • hanging out with their moms 
  • taking sneaky pics of your boyfriends when they’re asleep
  • them looking after you when you’re feeling down
  • the making out sessions can either be really sweet and soft or really rough and hot
  • it could be a make out session with just one of them or with both 
  • normally with both of them it gets heat really fast 
  • the sex is mind blowing
  • you receive more than you give (and be ready for not be able to walk properly in the next few days) 
  • none of you three can be quiet
  • having sex with music playing in the background (normally chose by the boys)
  • when one of them is away it’s okay for the other two have sex
  • whoever is away, always wants to know how it was (so he/she can be better)
  • and because it may turn them on • Teasing them when you’re away   
  • with really sexy skype calls (it would drive them insane!) 
  • sexy pics 

this was a tiny collab between the amazing and beautiful @we-all-have-a-psychopath and i. hope you enjoyed it!

Reaction To Seeing You In Your Under Garments For The First Time

NCT 127

Requested: ‘Nct 127 reaction to seeing you in a bra and shorts for the first Time but to you it’s not that big a deal’

A/N: Don’t hate me



Taeil:

Originally posted by tensol

*tries to act normal*
“Your hair looks pretty today-”


Johnny:

Originally posted by 1aeyong

ignore tae
He’d probably think you intentionally were showing-off.
He’d be kind of bewildered, it’d be the first time he ever saw you in your under garments…
“What are you doing?!”


Taeyong:

Originally posted by younghom

Taeyong would turn coy, thinking you were putting on a show for him. He’d smirk at you from the sofa, patting his lap.
“I’m waiting-”
When you’d turn away, heading into the kitchen, he’d frown, knitting his eyebrows together- confused.
“W-Where are you going?”


Yuta:

Originally posted by nctech

Yuta would feign irritation at your unbeknownst teasing. However, his act wouldn’t hold up for long, as he would scorn you playfully while pulling you closer to tickle you.
“야! You- walking around like that!”


Doyoung:

Originally posted by dovounq

Ah! He’d be a bit shy. He’d cast his gaze to his shoes, not wanting to be disrespectful by gawking… He’d be a little awkward about it.
“Ah- Are my ears turning red?”
He’s not normally shy, but since it’d be the 1st time that would mean your relationship was still relatively new.


Jaehyun:

Originally posted by hansoulji

*weird Jaehyun activated*
You’d think he’d be mature about it, maybe even a little coy, but instead he’d feign immaturity, causing a scene.
“OMG!”


WinWin:

Originally posted by smboys

*chokes on cereal*
Sicheng would be the most surprised. He’d try not to make a scene, seeing how you acted natural, as if it wasn’t a big deal.
*speaks formally while accidentally knocking bowl over*
“H-How are you?”


Mark:

Originally posted by chokemewinwin

Mark would feel flustered. When you’d confront him nonchalantly about acting weirdly he’d say:
“Well I mean-” *gestures to you*
*drops the topic since he doesn’t want to seem like a square, making a big deal out of something you don’t see as a big deal*


Haechan:

Originally posted by hellocatfood

anonymous asked:

Headcanons for the older chocobros discovering their s/o are ten years younger then them?

Oooh~ this is an interesting request! Thanks for sending it in! <3

Tagging: @itshaejinju and @blindbae <3 (and @nifwrites because… fluff!!!!). Enjoy the fluffiness my fluffy people :D


Noctis: King Noctis has always known that you are significantly younger than him, what with your adorable ways and your happy-go-lucky attitude, but when he finds out that you’re TEN years younger than him, he gets a little worried. First of all, because he’s been wearing the Ring of the Lucii, he’s aged very quickly. So, he doesn’t look like a man who had just turned thirty- he looks and feels more like a forty year old. He starts to feel self-conscious about his appearance, and you notice that Noctis begins to dress ‘younger’ in his choco-mog t-shirt and his baggy jeans whenever the two of you spend some private time together. After noticing this happening for a few weeks, you call Noctis up on his recent change light-heartedly. However, this begins a small argument which escalates unnecessarily until you’re nearing tears and Noctis is frustrated beyond belief. He mentions breaking up, because he’s under the impression that you’re just with him because you haven’t known or experienced romance with any other man. After all, you’re only twenty years old- just barely an adult. You immediately shake your head, tears falling down your cheeks quicker than previously before. You taste the salt on your lips and you sniffle loudly as you grab Noctis by the collar and haul yourself into his warm chest. You wrap your arms around his torso and press your nose against his defined pectoral muscles before shaking your head repeatedly, desperate to get your adamant refusal across to your older boyfriend.

“I don’t care about your looks- you’re the only man I’ll ever look at. I love you. Only you. Forever, it will always be you.” Noctis leans forward at your words and places a chaste kiss on your temple before nuzzling gently into your soft locks.

“Sorry. Yeah… okay. I love you too, y/n.”

You frown. “You don’t sound so sure about that, your majesty…”

Noctis smirks down at you before planting a passionate kiss on your lips, grunting softly as you pull him in closer to deepen the kiss. You’re both panting by the end of the kiss and you’re both smiling into each other’s eyes, absolutely love struck.

No further words are needed. The love between the two of you is strong- even with the age-gap. After all, age is just a number!


Prompto: Prompto thinks that you’re like him- thirty years old with a twenty year old mentality. He likes the way that you seem to be mature at one moment, and then break into unexplainable giggles the next. He enjoys going on random photo expeditions with you, and he absolutely adores the impromptu photo shoots that you beg him to take you on. Prompto has always thought you were somewhere close to his age. But when he finds out you’re a whole ten years younger than he is, he takes a second to let the fact sink in before approaching you bashfully and confronting you head on about the matter. When he asks you why you hid the fact from him for so long, you merely shrug and deny that you were hiding your age from him. You explain that your age never really came up and you had assumed that he was okay with the age difference. Your voice hitches slightly in your chest, your fragile emotions revealing to Prompto your true age, and he immediately shakes his head in regret and takes you into his warm, loving arms.

“No, no! Don’t cry- I still love you all the same! Age is just a number! And you’re so mature sometimes for a twenty year old- really! When I was twenty, I was fumbling and bumbling all over the place! You’re so amazing, y/n!”

You sniffle and hold onto your older boyfriend tighter, unwilling to let go after the break-up scare you’d just given yourself. “Really?” you ask, your voice coming out as a whimper. Prompto pulls your head up by the chin and places an insistent kiss on your tear-stained lips, licking his own lips as he pulls away and smiles down tenderly at you. His clear blue eyes are filled with adoration, and you know that his words are true.

“Really. I love you, baby.”

You smile up at him, your eyes full of adoration and warmth. You absolutely love this man.

“Thank you, my sunshine, I love you too.”


Gladio: Gladiolus has had his suspicions about your age, but he hasn’t really tried to investigate those suspicions. He was pretty sure you were of legal consenting age, and he didn’t want to make things awkward between the two of you, given that your relationship with Gladio was still pretty fresh. However, when you start to drag him along to meetings and casual hangouts with your same-aged friends, Gladiolus decides to speak up about the age difference.

“Hey, babe?” Gladio asks you, all of sudden. You stop chatting with your friend via text message and shoot your boyfriend a curious glance. You’ve noticed the way Gladio’s shoulders have tensed, as well as the way he’s staring at you so seriously with his warm amber eyes. Something about his demeanour doesn’t sit with you well, and you gulp out of nervousness.

“Yes?”

“How old are you?” your jaw drops at Gladio’s question, and Gladio immediately shakes his head, reaching out to hold your clammy hand in his large, warm palm. “Hey, I’m just curious. I feel like I should know how old my baby girl is- I’d be a pretty shitty boyfriend if I didn’t know-”

You shake your head and interject, your voice panicked. “That’s not even, like, important! Like, nothing would even change if I did tell you my age, right? You won’t break up with me if I’m… too young, or too ancient for you or something, right?” your voice wavers, despite the smile you’re trying to wear on your face. Your palms start to sweat profusely and Gladio clasps at you hand, his grip warm and safe.

You didn’t want him to ever let go. But… if he knew your actual age…

Gladio frowned at your hesitance and immediately pulled you towards his chest, murmuring softly into your ear with his gravelly voice- his facial hair ticking your soft skin. “Baby, I’m not trying to break up with you or anything. I just want to know because… I just feel like it’s something that I need to be aware of.”

You stare up at Gladio and find yourself pressing a kiss below his ear before sighing sadly and grasping onto his jacket, feeling hints of his bare skin pressing against your clothed torso. “Twenty four…”

Gladio pulls away, his eyes wide. “Ten years… are you sure you want to be with an old dude like me?” Gladio asks, his tone full of uncertainty. Your eyes tear up at the hesitance in Gladio’s usually confident voice, and you nod your head resolutely. You lean up and place a lingering kiss on your older boyfriend’s lips, smiling slightly through your happy tears as you felt him press his lips tenderly against your own.

“Yes. It has to be you, Gladiolus Amicitia. I love you.”


Ignis: Ignis is troubled by the fact that you always dodge around his questions about your age. Given that his eyesight is pretty much non-existent, he’s not able to gage just how old you are by appearance alone. Although age doesn’t really matter to him, Ignis doesn’t want to be seen gallivanting around with a minor- that would definitely not look good for the royal advisor. So he asks you about your favourite music, your favourite food, your favourite art style, your favourite pop icon- anything that can give him information about your age.

Based on what you have answered so far, he believes that you are a few years younger than he is. But he wants to know for sure. He wants to know for certain just how much younger you are. And so he instigates his plan, late in the evening when only you and he are present in the common room of your apartment complex.

Ignis Scientia purposefully sits close to you, his thigh against yours, and his hand gently resting on your bare knee. You’re wearing sleeping shorts and a thin tank top because of the Lestallum heat. Ever since the light had been restored by King Noctis, the meteor nearby had been letting off a lot of heat. So now, even the nights were terribly humid.

Ignis traces his bare fingers along the tops of your thighs gently as he leans his head against your shoulder and sighs out loud. “I feel terribly worn out, y/n.”

You frown and tilt your head towards Ignis’, plucking his protective glasses off his eyes and smoothing down the healed scarring on his eyes with your fingers. You lean forward and press a soft kiss against his old injuries before nuzzling against the side of his head with your nose.

“How so?” you ask quietly. Ignis shrugs his shoulders and buries his face further into the crook of your neck, inhaling the fruity scent of your favourite soap and shampoo.

“I feel like I cannot keep up with your youth and vitality. I forget my age sometimes, you see. Apparently, I feel that I’ve forgotten yours too. Would you remind me of that small fact once more, dearest?” Ignis takes a small breath, noticing that you have stopped moving… and your breathing is very quiet. Ignis lifts himself off your body and smiles gently over to where he believes you are. “Y/n?”

You’re eyes are wide and your mouth is wide open. You weren’t expecting Ignis to ask about your age. You didn’t want to tell him- someone so amazing, resilient, charming, intelligent and mature would surely break up with you the moment he realised just how young and inexperienced you were. You gulp and grab Ignis’ hand in your own before squeezing gently.

“It’s rude to ask.” You say simply. Ignis sighed and shakes his head, bringing his hand up to his eyes in an uncharacteristically pitiful gesture.

“I know but… I can’t see you, so I can’t even dare to estimate your age. I just want to know because I want to love every little thing about you, dear. Please?” Ignis pleaded with you. You shut your eyes tight at his request before clenching and unclenching your fists.

You don’t know why you’re on Ignis the next moment, but your mouth finds its way onto his, and he grunts in surprise at the sudden onslaught of open mouthed kisses being delivered to his mouth by yours. He reciprocates, timidly at first, before you let out a soft moan of want. This has Ignis taking you into his arms and deepening your kisses, his tongue mingling with yours in a sweet dance. You sigh against his lips and pull apart from him reluctantly, staring at his awestruck face.

“Darling… what was that for?” Ignis asks you, his voice incredibly low and confused.

“I’m twenty three.” You admit, planting a kiss on Ignis’ jaw line. Ignis sighs in contentment and runs his hands through your soft locks.

“You certainly have the energy of a twenty three year old. I am a lucky man.”

You smile, tears filling your eyes in relief of his mellow reaction. “Thank you.” You gasp, pressing your face gently into the crook of your boyfriend’s neck. Ignis smiles against your cheek.

“I love you, dearest.” You sigh in contentment and press a kiss onto Ignis’ lightly freckled skin.

“I love you too, Iggy.”

anonymous asked:

I had to get teeth pulled yesterday and i get your not taking prompts so i feel really bad for asking but i could really use a fic where alex or maggie gets teeth pulled and its just funny because laughing gas and novicane

Of course she’s avoided going to the dentist.

“I have worlds to save and a superhero little sister to take care of, Kara, I don’t have time to let some stranger poke around in my mouth with sharp implements.”

But Kara pouts, and Alex has a acquired a limited immunity to it, but when Maggie joins in with a “Danvers, you were in so much pain last night we had to stop while you – “, Alex yelps and blushes and “alright, alright, alright, I’ll go to the damn dentist.”

Of course her wisdom teeth are impacted.

Of course they are.

Maggie holds her hand even though Alex mutters something about being a grown woman, but Kara just laughs gently and spills the secret of how much Alex hates, hates, hates needles.

Alex would normally mind, but it’s Maggie; it’s Maggie, and Kara knows this, and sure enough, Maggie doesn’t laugh – she hates needles, too – and she doesn’t tease. She just kisses the inside of Alex’s arm, the underside of her wrist, gives her hand to Kara, and tells her she’ll be right back.

Turns out she’s asked if they can give Alex gas before they give her any needles, and she’s given them death glares when they tell her they usually only do that for children, and they’ve acquiesced and Alex?

Alex is bad enough at being taken care of normally, but coming out from under laughing gas while on novocaine? She’s an absolute terror.

“Alex, hey. Maggie’s in the waiting room, do you want her to come in, too?”

“Kara! Heyyyy. You know those glasses don’t make you look all that much different. Maggie knew. Maggie’s so smart. Isn’t she smart, Kara? And pretty? Isn’t she so pretty? Hehe, my girlfriend. Isn’t it funny that she’s so smart and she’s so pretty and she’s so my girlfriend? And your glasses. Hehe. People are stupid.”

Kara fetches Maggie immediately.

“Hey soldier, how you holding up?”

“Hey, Kara look! It’s my girlfriend! You know I was just talking about you. I mean, I think I was. Was I, Kara? It’s… did they do the thing yet? Oh, hey, there’s all this stuff in my mouth… That was fast, wasn’t that fast? Hey, Maggie, you know if you kissed me right now I probably wouldn’t feel it? How weird is that? Not feeling your kiss? Because your kisses are amazing, I’ve never – “

“Well, I’ll leave you two alone – “

“No, little sis, stayyyyy! Stay, we won’t make out, Maggie doesn’t kiss me when I’m not sober, she’s annoying like that, all consenty and stuff – “

Maggie kisses her forehead and Alex preens and her gauze slips out of her mouth and Maggie chuckles as Alex splutters and she replaces it tenderly with a fresh one. Kara’s heart melts and Alex’s heart swells.

“Oh heyyy, I get to have smoothies, right?”

“Yes, babe, I got you all kinds of – “

“Ugh, is it vegan ice cream? Because I… it… gross…”

Kara and Maggie exchange smirks as Alex passes out. It’s another half hour or so before she wakes up again, before she’s cleared to be taken out of the recovery room and into Maggie’s car home.

“Ally, it’s okay, you’ve gotta go slow – “

So naturally, Alex tries to sprint down the hallway.

Kara and Maggie both wonder when they became the parents instead of Alex and Maggie.

In the car – another ordeal, because Alex is exhausted and high and rebellious all at the same time, and keeps trying to get into the driver’s seat, something about Maggie’s legs not being long enough to reach the gas pedals – Kara pulls Alex’s head into her lap in the back seat and strokes her hair until she falls back to sleep.

Maggie adjusts the rear view mirror before she pulls out of the parking space so she can take a long glance at her Danvers girls, a soft smile on her face and an unfamiliar warmth in her heart.

She’s not sure, but she thinks the warmth might be something like family.

2

Whispers of Love ♥ Message Cards ~Winter Ver.~

(from the January 2017 Otomedia. thank you to @belligerence for sharing scans and permitting me to translate!)

We’ve gotten some heartwarming, touching winter comments from these seven SHSL Mirai-hen men ♥ Who will you try to make some memories with this winter?

Monomi
Love, love, everyone!

Makoto Naegi
Q: If your crush looked cold, how would you warm them up?
A: I guess I’d give them something warm to drink… I’d like to try being cool by offering them my scarf, but I’d be a little embarrassed to. I think that kind of thing would suit someone stylish like Togami-kun, but I’d rather not look weird standing on my toes… so.

Byakuya Togami
Q: What would you do if it suddenly started snowing during a date?
A: You mean, other than take out an umbrella? Were you trying to suggest I should frolic in the romantic snowfall? It’s always such a grueling ordeal to attempt to understand the thoughts of you commoners.

Yasuhiro Hagakure
Q: What kind of winter fun would you like to go out and have?
A: Worshipping at a shrine first thing in the New Year! The key is to put on a big hood and go to the biggest shrine you can find. Try to look like you’re deeeeply religious and have a very important prayer to make, and worship there for a long time, so that you build up a lot of coins that were thrown from behind you. It’s fine to go alone, but if you can get someone to go with you, that’s just more profit you’ll be making!

Juuzou Sakakura
Q: Tell us about a winter memory.
A: When we were in school, Munakata got a crapton of chocolate for Valentine’s Day. It looked like a scene ripped straight out of a manga. He tried to hand some off to me and Yukizome because he said he couldn’t eat that much, but I was on my diet at the time, and Yukizome said “You can’t just delegate people’s feelings for you like that” or whatever and refused to take any, so for once he was losing his cool… I wouldn’t say this to his face, but it was pretty funny seeing him so flustered.

Kouichi Kizakura
Q: If your crush looked cold, how would you warm them up?
A: Personally, I’d like to give ‘em a hug, but, well, you gotta respect their personal space and all that. Holding their hand to warm it up, though… That’s a romantic situation I’d like to bring about. Lemme have that much, will you? I’m an adult.

Kyousuke Munakata
Q: Who do you know that would be the best escort on a winter date?
A: Sakakura, most likely. He’s accompanied me out often enough with Yukizome as a group of three. Since he likes sweets, he’ll take us out to the popular cafes and such, and since he’s resilient against the cold, he’s taken us out to look at all the lights on display as well. He might have complained about it, but that doesn’t stop him from being casually considerate, so wouldn’t the same apply to a woman he was dating? He wouldn’t be a boring date.

Ryouta Mitarai
Q: Would you rather go out or stay in for a date on a cold winter’s day?
A: On those kinds of days, I’d really rather stay home and enjoy some anime. We could even marathon some anime that aired during the winter. That’d be fun. And after that, I think it would be romantic if we each tried to compile some anime with good art of the snow.

Shrek

I watched all of the shrek movies recently. Memes are fucking immature so this is going to be kind of an uninfluenced review. I dont feel like the tim and eric or what have you style comedy where you pretend to like shrek a whole lot got into me when we were doing this as its a little dated. I decided to take the films at face value. What are they worth?

Shrek 1 - Shrek was written and created by some people who work on movies over at Dream works. Its still pretty good. The graphical quality holds up. Shrek doesnt appear in the movie but eddie murphy does make up well for the eerie silence brought about by the vanishment of each other cast member. Its so good that Will smith remembered every line of it in that other movie.

(Five tiny scream guys out of five) 

Shrek 2 - This one is still good but the DVD went to autoplay when I was microwaving popcorn and my gf made me make it go back to the root menu and the popcorn caught fire and we nearly died. The premise shows wear but the wit is still alive. The last great shrek story as simon cowell viciously tore Shrek to pieces with his fangs at the end. PS: The dvd (issued 2005) of this i have said on the back it was the “highest rated animation of all time”. Which isnt true because it gets one less tiny scream guy than the first one.

Shrek 3 - They made a whole movie but forgot to put any jokes in it. Eric idle is in it becuase john cleeses character died. Do u think they passed in the dreamworks corridor and looked awkwardly at one another? If the best your movie has to offer is referencing monty python and the holy grail then you have to do better because in the first place that movie isnt actually that funny. I loved it when i was 10 but the only jokes i can remember now are the knights of the round table song and the killer rabbit. Its better than this though.

Shrek 4 - what the hell. ok id seen the first three before in the past but this one was totally new. Reality gets erased and Shrek is unborn. A world of warcraft race struggle plays out on the screen. For some reason the graphics are worse. The acting is also worse. Everything is worse and yet i also kind of loved the mayhem of the writers deciding to create an alternate timeline where shreks insidious legacy is erased and where a cool battle happens instead. I dont know who in the office they got to voice the little man but it was scary.

Puss in boots - No this isnt a joke. This is a real movie that was in theaters. No one watched it until I did so this is actually the first review! A bunch of good animators were forced to waste their time making a movie based off a script generated by a neural network. This whole thing is a mess. In the first thirty minutes the only joke is puss in boots says “leche” instead of milk. The next hour will reveal that in every moment of puss in boots’ life he is being watched in the corner by an egg person, like a bad slenderman arg. The dartboard they use to pick fairy tale characters to be the villain must have broke halfway thru because who the hell is “kitty soft paws”? This movie genuinely may be an industry test to see if the audience will be satisfied with anything they put on the screen and I kind of love how callous it is. Its about a cat fighting an egg.

Wake up!

Baron Corbin x Reader

Originally posted by sassabarry

“I know baby, yeah… I get that..” Baron was on his phone talking to his girlfriend of 4months, “Please, don’t be upset… I know, I know. Ok, well I’m on my way then!” the last sentece made you crease you eyebrow.

“What’s up this time?” you asked annoyed when Baron hung up.

“I’m sorry Y/N, but I have to cancel our plans.” he nonchalantly informed you.

“What? Why? We talked about this for months now! Did you now how much I spent on the tickets?”

Keep reading

Adam Raki and the Accidental Nurse

Today is my darling @hotsauce418‘s birthday and the trash possum extraordinaire requested some Spacedogs sickfic. So happy birthday hotty, I hope you enjoy <3<3<3

Also on AO3.


“Fucking cocksucking asshole cab drivers!”

If he looked at it objectively, Nigel would probably allow that there was a reason cab drivers tended not to stop for him. Six foot of glowering, tattooed Romanian was probably enough to make even your most toughened Californian cabbie lock all his doors, let alone the pussies who drove in this hoity-fucking-toity neck of the woods. Objectivity was not, however, one of Nigel’s strong points, so instead he elected to continue growling obscenities at the entire cab-driving profession as he moved down towards the back of the bus he’d been forced to mount in lieu of any other transport options.

“Motherfucking dick hole son of a fucking whore!”

“Could you please refrain from swearing until you have left the bus, please?”

Nigel swung to find the source of the soft but direct complaint, fully anticipating a welcome chance to knock some cheeky fucker’s face in. What he found, instead, was a face he wouldn’t wish to see damaged by his or any other fists for all the money in the world. Bright blue eyes, wide and innocent looking, were set in a pale, smooth-skinned face, and set off by waves of brown hair, just coming loose from the neat, careful shape they had been tamed into. Nigel took in the young man sitting opposite him, the old man clothes and stiff demeanour not remotely dimming his beauty, and immediately decided to switch from offensive to charm offensive.

He grabbed the rail above the kid’s seat and hung off it, leaning down with a smile to say, “My apologies, gorgeous, I didn’t realise I was being so uncouth. I’d hate to think I made you uncomfortable.”

The kid crossed his arms in front of himself, not meeting Nigel’s gaze, and said, “I don’t like loud noises or swearing, they make me uncomfortable. In addition, I have a very bad headache and am not feeling very well, so I would appreciate it if you could wait until you are further away before continuing your tirade. And my name is Adam,” he added. “Please don’t call me gorgeous, it is demonstrably untrue and therefore either you are mocking me, or attempting to use an endearment inappropriate for someone you have just met.”

Nigel blinked, and then gave Adam a slow look up and down. “Darling, I’m not sure what you see when you look in the mirror, but from here you are very evidently the most gorgeous thing in this whole damn state.”

At this, Adam flicked his eyes up to Nigel’s for a fraction of a second before he looked away again. He sighed and said, “I can’t tell if you mean what you say. Normally I would attempt to understand, but I’m really not feeling well enough to do so today. My stop is not far away, would you mind if we don’t talk anymore?”

“I don’t mind darling,” Nigel grinned. He was suddenly very glad to have taken the fucking bus this once, if it meant getting to sit next to this strange, pretty kid for a little while. “But in return, might I sit with you, seems like all the other seats are taken. Promise to keep my trap shut,” he added, holding his hands up as Adam narrowed his eyes. The kid peered at him – or at least, near to him – for another moment, then gave a curt nod of his head, and moved a little to the side to make space for Nigel.

True to his word, Nigel didn’t utter another syllable. He did, however, take advantage of Adam’s resolutely front-facing gaze to look his fill. At first, he simply admired the kid’s trim figure, his long legs and the way his surprisingly broad shoulders tapered into a slim waist. Eventually, though, he lifted his gaze above the kid’s neck and began to get concerned. There was sweat on Adam’s brow, and high colour in his cheeks. He hadn’t been lying when he said he was sick.

“Adam, I know I said I would be quiet, but you don’t look good, darling. Are you going to be ok?” The question drew no response, and Nigel began to get truly worried at the glassy look in Adam’s eyes. He was about to try again when the bus started to slow, and Adam stood jerkily, swaying a little as he gathered his things. Apparently this was his stop. Reluctantly, Nigel stood to let him past, already wondering if he should offer to see the kid home, if that would be unwelcome to this closed off young man. His mind was made up for him, though, when Adam fainted clean into his arms.

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Hey there, neighbor

Pairing: Carl Gallagher x Reader
Description: the reader is new to Chicago and moves in right across from the Gallagher house 
A/N: another short one but I wanted to get this out so enjoy


Originally posted by titaniumelastic

Moving to a new town wasn’t anything new for you, but moving to the south side of Chicago was something you never expected from your mother. You had moved around since you could remember for unknown reasons, simply because your mom didn’t want to stress you out.

That made since some days, other days it made you question everything. You made friends where you went and then you’d have to move and they would never talk to you again. Your life was an endless circle of leaving people behind and at some point it got old.

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anonymous asked:

Would you ever write ace bitty? Where after he figured out he was gay, everything felt right for a little, but then started feeling wrong again because he was ace. And then he's super worried about coming out about it to Jack because he's fine with making out and all the stuff before it, but after, he wants no part. (I'm not projecting this coming out to a partner anxiety, what are you talking about?)

So, anon. I was really, really excited about this prompt, but you happened to ask exactly the right thing at exactly the wrong time. It clashed with some real life events in the worst possible way, which is why it took so long to get to you. 
[we’ll just call this an AU of the same conversation i had with my own partner]
cw: mention of rape (in a general discussion about consent way)

By all rights, Bitty should have been happy. He should have been ecstatic. It was his senior year, he was captain of the hockey team, he was in a relationship with a wonderful, loving, amazing man. He was out to his friends. He was finally, finally living the life he always hoped he could have been never thought he would.

But… he wasn’t happy. Somehow, he still felt like he was living a lie. Not exactly the same lie he was living back in Georgia, but almost worse in a way. Because it wasn’t the lie he had grown up telling himself, then telling his family. No, it was something that he was keeping from that wonderful, amazing man.

Despite all the joking around that the team did about him and Jack and their sex life, it wasn’t exactly the active thing they thought it was. No, Jack and Bitty had intercourse exactly once, and never again. Not for lack of trying (on Jack’s part, at least). But between both of their busy lives, it was never a problem that had come up, really. And, well, it was never really a problem for Bitty at all.

They made it work with cuddles and the occasional Skype sex… or, well, that implied that it was a two-way thing, and mostly it was just enthusiastic participation on Jack’s end and encouragement on Bitty’s.

But, somehow the fates had aligned and both men had time off, and time alone. Bitty was the first to move into the Haus by about a week, so that he could get it ready for the school year and psych himself up for being captain. The Falcs weren’t quite into their regular training schedule yet, so Jack managed to take a few days off to help move Bitty in. And to spend some much needed time together.

And that probably, definitely, meant sex.

The thing was, though… Bitty liked the way he fit under Jack’s arm and the feeling of a warm body pressed against his while they watched silly youtube videos. He even liked the feeling of Jack’s lips pressed against his and big hands running up and down his back and his sides. The rest of it, though…

Bitty was happy with just the cuddling and sweet kisses. Just cuddles and kisses. That was all he wanted. And he didn’t know how to tell Jack, who he was in a relationship, that he no longer wanted that it to include sex.

It felt like a huge giant lie. Jack had entered into their relationship under the impression that there would be a sexual component to it. For a full year, Bitty had lied about it. Well, maybe not lied, because he definitely thought that was something he wanted at first. But misrepresented.

Bitty knew that Jack was going to be there any minute to help him unpack everything, but he just couldn’t find the energy in himself to get up. In his head, Bitty was just reserving the energy he had for the impending conversation he knew he would have to have with Jack. In reality, that wasn’t quite the case, but it never really hurt to tell yourself a small lie like that.

He tried hard to organize the thoughts in his head, to find a way to explain how he was feeling without making Jack feel like he was lied to or taken advantage of. He tried to think of a way to explain that he really thought he was gay, for 20 years that’s the label he gave himself, and now he was maybe reconsidering? Gosh, even thinking the word asexual made him cringe.

It wasn’t that he thought there was anything wrong with being asexual. He knew that Dex was, and Shitty would just about have a field day if he knew that Bitty was even thinking along those lines. No, that wasn’t what he was having a problem with. His problem was that he had always been so sure that he was gay.

The slamming of the front door knocked Bitty out of his thoughts. He wasn’t prepared, not in the least, and yet there was Jack calling out to him. “Bitty, you here?”

He could tell Jack had been spending a lot of time with Marty lately, his accent was so much thicker than normal.

“In here, sweetheart.”

Jack a few steps up the staircase, probably on his way to Bitty’s room. Bitty tracked his movement by sound, but didn’t turn around to watch his boyfriend enter the living room. He couldn’t look at Jack, not if he wanted to get through this talk without breaking down before it even happened.

After a few seconds, Jack was behind the couch pressing a soft kiss to the top of Bitty’s head. It nearly broke him.

“Hey, honey.” Bitty finally turned to look at Jack and felt tears forming in his eyes. Oh, this was gonna be a mess and a half.

Jack looked beautiful, as always. Being with the Falconers, despite the increased pressure, had done so right by him. He was thicker and more muscular than even six months ago, and the off season left him with a tan that made his blue eyes practically glow.

Of course, the minute he saw Bitty’s face, the wide smile he wore fell and he immediately sat down next to Bitty on the couch (and if him sitting on the nasty green couch wasn’t an indication that something was wrong, really what was?).

“Are you okay?”

Bitty put a hand on Jack’s knee. “Um, actually. We need to talk.”

Jack slouches in on himself. “Oh. Uh, okay.”

All of Bitty’s planning went straight out the window. Before he realized he was even doing it, his mouth was spouting every thought in his head.“I lied to you. And I understand if you want to break up with me. I totally get it, and I’m pretty sure the only reason I’m not breaking up with you is because I’m selfish. I’m real selfish, Jack.”

Jack go a hurt look on his face that Bitty only saw there once before when he was talking about Kent Parson, and he had never hated himself more for being the one to put it there. He never, ever wanted to see Jack so hurt, especially because of him.

And of course, Jack was just as supportive and amazing as ever. He placed one of his own hands over Bitty’s, where it rested, clenched, on his thigh. “Whatever the problem is, Bittle, we can deal with it.”

A little part of Bitty knew that Jack calling him Bittle wasn’t strange or abnormal. Heck, he was still Bittle more often than Bitty. But in that moment, a huge part of him screamed that it was Jack’s way of creating distance, of falling back into an unfamiliar name so that he would have an easier time breaking up with Bitty.

He could feel a single tear rolling down his cheek, but didn’t bother to wipe it away. More would just come to replace it anyway. “I know that we had a lot of plans for this week, the time we have together. And I still want to spend every little second I can with you! But… but I don’t want to have sex.”

Jack’s face went from the painfully blank expression to confused. There was a little wrinkle between his eyebrows that, on any other day, Bitty would run a finger over to relax the muscles there.

“Bittle. Bitty, that’s okay. We don’t have to rush into anything. I don’t have a problem with waiting if that’s what you want.”

“No, Jack. I don’t want to wait. I don’t want to have sex at all. I, um. When I told you I was gay, I think I lied to you. I did lie to you. I love you to death, but I just don’t want… that. Ever. I think I’m asexual.”

Bitty looked down at where their hands were joined. He couldn’t bear to look at Jack’s face. He already knew what it would look like. That same carefully blank expression he had on earlier, the one that said he was upset. Or maybe he would be outright angry, rage painted on his face in a way that was usually saved for the ice.

They sat there like that for longer than Bitty thought he could stand. He couldn’t be the one who broke the silence, but he flinched when Jack did.

“Eric, look at me.” Eric. God, that hurt. “Please, please look at me.”

Bitty couldn’t deny that urgent tone in Jack’s voice, and he couldn’t delay the inevitable. He lifted his tear-filled eyes to meet Jack’s. Instead of blank or even angry, like he thought he would find, Jack’s expression was something Bitty had never seen before. It was serious and… hurt?

“I don’t care about that, okay? I love you, and I don’t care about the sex. But please, please tell me that the time we did, and the skype… I wasn’t forcing you, was it? Did I pressure you into it? I didn’t, did I?”

Bitty’s eyes went wide with horror. “No! Baby, no, not at all. I promise, I never felt pressure about anything.”

Jack pulled him into a tight hug and he couldn’t hold back anymore. Bitty started crying. If someone asked, there was no way he could name everything he was feeling in that moment. He was still so scared that their relationship wouldn’t work out, that this would end up coming between them. And he was so happy that Jack said he didn’t care about sex, even if Bitty was pretty sure he had no idea what all that entailed. He was relieved that this whole conversation was done and over with. He was nearly giddy with how well it had went.

And above all else, Bitty felt loved. He felt secure and supported, and he felt like he was exactly where he was supposed to be, in Jack’s arms.

love is love

Lukas lounges on the couch and stretches his legs out until his knee cracks. He can still see the rainbow flag across the street billowing out their neighbor’s window and he sighs, smiling to himself.

Spring semester was a breeze compared to their fall semester, though they only had two classes together this time around. Philip takes and develops more photos every day, and he joined a photography club that monopolizes way too much of his time, Lukas decided after twelve hours apart. More and more people have been getting interested in Philip’s work, and someone actually hired him to take pictures of their baby shower. Lukas went with him and after a brief freakout in the hallway, Philip took some of the best pictures Lukas has ever seen him take. They were gorgeous and he got a hundred bucks out of it, but Lukas has still yet to convince him to actually try to start taking freelance pictures for events. But he’s gonna keep trying.

They visited home more and Lukas practiced on his bike when he was in Tivoli, always with Philip pressed up close against his back. It felt strange when they were there, like they were catching a bit of the past and holding it between their fingers—they always have more nightmares when they’re there, but Lukas is grateful they never have to worry about not sleeping in the same bed.

They escaped midterms with all A’s, and finals with A’s and B’s and one B-, thanks to Philip’s chemistry class, and they celebrated finishing their first year of college with Angela, some gourmet New York pizza, and the puppies. Which made Philip want a dog even more. Which made Lukas start thinking really hard about the future.

For now, it’s the beginning of their summer and the beginning of June, which means that Philip is fluttering around the apartment, getting ready for the Pride Parade. He’s been anticipating it ever since he found out it was going right by their apartment, and in the beginning he wasn’t sure if Lukas would go with him. But they’re long past the point of being afraid to ask things like that, and when Philip presented the question Lukas, of course, said he’d be going with him.

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