We did it amigos. Another list! I am so grateful that you all are sharing your ideas to help inspire others (faith in humanity restored)
“Where is my fucking pudding?!”
“I thought we agreed to never use butter for that reason again…”
“Well if it’s the guy who never shuts up about toilet paper!”
“Honey, did you see my sniper rifle?”
“God damn it he died. Whatever. Just leave him there.”
“Listen, I know you’re upset, but please put down the baking soda before someone gets hurt.”
“Look, about the monkey…”
“I don’t understand! I only used a finger.”
“It’s not as hard as you think, I promise.”
“well this is what i call hell of a night”
“How could an entire school disappear?”
“What do you mean the brownies are "not quite brownies”?“
"Yes, I understand that its cool, but why does your toaster have wings?” “Well its alive of course. It flies.”
“Don’t turn that on!”
“Wait…I’m also- technically- underage and you’re a stranger…should I be screaming also?”
“I though you meant "literally” metaphorically. “
"Ok so don’t get mad but I might have started a war.”
“Good morning… I see the assassins failed again.”
“You’re a murderer, how are you working at a hospital?”
“That cat just stole my cereal!”
“Did you see that? Please tell me you saw it.”
“Hey, can you stop shooting people right now? We’re trying to sleep.”
“THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS KEITH!”
“If you think I’m leaving you and your demon eyes and evil horns you’re wrong.”
“What do you mean, this isn’t Earth?”
“Damn it, ____! Not peanuts again!”
“Why did I just press the big red button?”
“So tell me again why this dead body is being sent to Goodwill?”
“Lucifer, I know that we said we would share rent but you never said anything about your brother living with us.”
“God dammit, I’m supposed to be a bat! Why the hell am I a possum, Karen?!”
“Sarah, where’s the dog?” “Up in space?”
“You had only one job and it wasn’t even a difficult task, but seriously, how did you end up like this!?”
“Well I never said I WASN’T going to kill the bartender …”
“I mean, it was only a small eldritch being, so it wasn’t that bad…”
“Hold me back bro!”
“I think there’s a new lifeform evolving in my fridge.”
“WHAT THE FUCK?!”
“Can we have lunch now, or do you still want to continue looking at dead people?”
“I can’t believe you ate my cheese…we’re over”
“Sometimes I wonder why we’re still friends.” “Because I turned you into a cyborg after being shredded by an explosion and you owe me.” “…Fair enough.”
“Well, I didn’t quite expect to wake up pregnant either and yet… here we are, so can you please pass me that can of bread?”
“Ok, I know I said ‘You can throw a hairbrush at them’, but I didn’t actually mean it!”
“When I told you to feed the dog I didn’t expect you to feed him the neighbors cat.”
“Clearly, you’ve never gotten rid of a body before…”
“This sort of thing never happened when I was dating your brother.”
Sometimes, I wonder about you. And then I worry.“
” Wait, wait, wait, start from the very beginning. how did you manage to set the house on fire with that??“
"For fucks sake, dude, how many times do I have to tell you that that’s not what penises are for?”
“One woman’s terrorist is another woman’s freedom fighter.”
“This isn’t right… the humans shouldn’t be able to move on their own.”
“Why is unicorn blood on our shopping list?”
“Must you unhinge your jaw like that when you eat? It’s disgusting.”
“You’ve violated the law, my trust, and your friend. Tell me, why should I believe anything you say?”
“No, no don’t open the fridge, I need to keep they eyeballs cold.”
“did he break his jaw again by falling down a flight of stairs?” “Passive aggressive much?”
“For the last time, put the declaration of independence back!”
"That isn’t permanent, right?”
“You know, ripping someone’s beating heart right out of their chest with your bare hand looks cool in anime, but irl it’s just unsanitary…”
“She didn’t tell you” “Tell me what” “He’s dead”
“But his dad is an asshole–” “HIS AUTHOR IS AN ASSHOLE”
“You are here and you haven’t tried to kill me yet. You must want something from me.”
“The salesperson made a flying tentacle monster sound a lot more alluring, I swear!”
“Okay…the radiator just growled at me”
“Dude, were you listening to me? Why are you barking?” “I’m not barking. I thought YOU were barking!”
“How did you get that bump on your lip”
“Buddy. You need to chill, and put that knife away before I get out my gun.”
“ ” I dare you to take your shirt off" “ no” “ I doubledare you” “No” “I tripledare you” “ god dammit Steve , im not wearing a Shirt!”“
"Why the fuck are there founding fathers in our living room”
“Girls only say 'I will not dignify that with a response.’ when they’ve done the thing you’ve just accused them of.” “Do you know this, because you’ve done it?” “I will not dignify that with a response.”
“They think we’re terrible but really we’re only mediocre”
“You’d think by now we’d stop bringing death into these things. Look at them, they have anxiety!”
“Ok, first of all asshat, stop touching me. Second, that is never going to work out! Third, stop TOUCHING me.”
“So if I do understand, you’re telling me that you created insects robots. The same one that destroyed the city. ”
“Why is THIS in your fridge? This is some serious contraband.”
“Please tell me you’re joking about marrying the bastard’s son we call Satan.” “ Don’t talk about your mother like that!!”
“Did you explode the microwave again?!”
"Honey where’s the dog?” “Like I said, I’m making a smoothie.”
“Fifteen bucks you can’t hook up with Satan.” “Make it twenty.”
“I don’t know, maybe because he has some semblance of taste?
"What could possibly make you think eating three tons of cheese for the mice in radiation-test labs was okay?!”
“Who actually let the dogs out?”
“Hey, you don’t know how many bodies are buried in my backyard.”
“I told you to kill me.” “I did. Just this morning.” “Well, shit!”
“So… This isn’t the end, is it? I mean I still want to hang out with you at least. Maybe go for another space adventure, hm?”
“I’m sorry, it was the HEAT OF THE MOMENT,”
"Hey, wanna go out for a romantic moonlight killing spree?”
“So, you’re into …..? Huh, I never would’ve known.”
“Did you hear that scream?” “Yes, I’m the one who screamed”
“What are you doing?”
“But really, why would anyone need two dozen armadillos?”
“You can’t keep 'solving’ your problems by going to another dimension!”
“I still can’t believe you assassinated a unicorn.”
“Wait, you have FOUR knives?” “No, no. I have four knives ON me.”
“I’ve killed a man using only a copy of Hamlet and a computer mouse. I am NOT afraid of you!"
"What the hell are those?”
“Are you sure you’re not an arsonist?”
“I know, right? You’d suspect any of them of secretly being an alien, but not…”
“Why didn’t you stop?”
“So, start explaining why there are dozens of puppies in my guest room.”
Let’s make another list. Part 3! Leave a reply and don’t forget the double quotes “”.
I want to give everyone a chance to contribute to our community. So as always, one prompt per amigo. Dankje!
- you’re studying in the library of your university with your friends jeonghan and seungcheol and everything’s going well like you’re actually surprised you’re getting work done with these two together and it’s all quiet and peaceful - but then jeonghan opens his mouth - and he says “oh (name)… so i know this guy who—“ - you’re like “not this again omfg jeonghan SHUT UP I’M PERFECTLY FINE BEING SINGLE” - seungcheol joins in and he says “(name) come on!!! you’re going to like this guy he’s so your type” - basically they’ve been trying to set you up with someone because they don’t want you to be alone once they leave - jeonghan and seungcheol have pretty much been your only friends since entering uni and they’re graduating that sem while you have one more year to go and they don’t want you to be all by yourself ISN’T THAT CUTE - but you’re perfectly fine living the single life and you don’t need a bf but they’re like NOPE WE WANT YOU HAPPY WHILE WE’RE GONE WE WANT SOMEONE TO TAKE CARE OF YOU WHILE WE CAN’T - you end up arguing with them to the point the librarian kicks all of you out because you’re all too loud and well there goes your studying - they keep annoying you but you keeping refusing and they finally give up and you’re like THANK YOU - seungcheol says “fine you’re paying for dinner then” and honestly you couldn’t care less because you’re not going on a blind date… - …or so you thought. - you get to the restaurant where you were supposed to meet jeonghan and seungcheol but WOW SURPRISE THEY’RE NOT THERE - instead, a person you’ve never met in your life is sitting at the table reserved for “s.coups” seungcheol’s stupid nickname - you’re like I CANNOT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THIS - while you’re internally raging and plotting your friends’ deaths, the boy at the table looks up from the menu and locks eyes with you and your heart skips a beat - he has. the most. gorgeous eyes you’ve ever seen and not going to lie he’s really cute and you’re like oh wow they weren’t kidding when they said he was your type in terms of looks - but then you snap out of your daze because you’re angry at your friends - you sit down and say “alright. jeonghan and seungcheol. sound familiar?” and all he says is “blind date” and you say “yeah” - the boy runs his hand through his hair and sighs “i should’ve expected this” and his hair gets all messy and cute and you’re like don’t do that - you say “i’m REALLY sorry about this” and he just smiles like “no worries it’s jeonghan and seungcheol like of course they’d pull something like this” - you laugh and say “right? i swear, one day i’m going to get back at them” and the boy laughs “me too” - but then his eyes widen and he looks up at you and says “……hey. i have an idea.” - you look at him like what is it and he says “do you really want to get back at them?” and you ask “what do you mean??” - he says “I MEAN…… we PRETEND to date. we trick them into thinking their plan worked and then we break up IN FRONT OF THEM like REAL BAD, that’ll teach them to quit setting us up on blind dates” - and you just stare at him like… did this angel just say the evillest thing - but you like the plan so you smirk and say “okay, sounds good. let’s do it.” - the boy reaches out his hand and says “i’m joshua by the way. it’s nice to meet you” - you shake his hand and say “i’m (name). nice to meet you too, boyfriend.” - you two end up actually having dinner at the restaurant but the whole time you guys are just laughing and talking about how this whole thing is going to go - unknown to you guys, jeonghan and seungcheol are watching your interaction from a distance and they high-five in victory because they think they succeeded - by the end of the night you and joshua exchange phone numbers and schedules, and you both plan the entire thing. the breakup is set to be at the end of the sem so in about four months - when you both go up to pay, you’re reaching for your wallet, but joshua stops you and says “if i’m going to be your pretend bf for the next four months, i should at least act the part well” and you say “what?? no no it’s fine you don’t have to do all this if it’s just pretend” and he just smiles and pays - actual gentleman joshua hong everyone - you guys ended up staying later than expected at the restaurant so it’s really dark by the time you guys get out - your dorms are on the same side of campus and yours is a little further, but this is JOSHUA so he walks you all the way there - while walking, you guys decide to tell each other a few things about each other and you find out you guys actually have so much in common??? - you get so into your conversation with joshua that by the time you reach your room, you’re disappointed by how short the walk was - you say “well this is my room. thanks for walking me back” and joshua says “it’s no problem. so….. since we’re “dating” now and all….. do you want to go eat out for lunch tomorrow?” - and you smile and say “sure!! this is perfect actually because i usually eat lunch with seungcheol and jeonghan so i can invite them along and we could tell them about how we’re “dating” and all” - joshua laughs and says “i can’t wait to see their reaction by the end of this” and you just laugh “me too” - joshua says “well, i’ll be going now. good night and see you tomorrow!!” and you say good night to him as well before entering your room and going to bed - the next day, after your morning classes, joshua texts you “hey! :) i’m right outside your building. seungcheol and jeonghan are here too” and you’re like omg he used a smiley face he’s so cute LOL - you go outside and see the three of them waiting for you so you run up to them, and they each greet you - seungcheol and jeonghan both have smirks on their faces and when joshua says he’ll be right back, they both go up to you and say “sooo we heard you guys are dating!!” and you laugh “yeah…. i actually had a good time with joshua last night at the restaurant. you guys were right when you said he was my type” - seungcheol gasps and says “joshua said that too!! i swear you guys are meant to be. jeonghan, we chose well.” - jeonghan pretends to wipe away a tear and says “my baby’s growing up” - when joshua comes back, you three go to a restaurant near campus just to have a quick lunch together, when seungcheol and jeonghan tell you guys they “have to go hand in an assignment” and you’re like OOOKAY RIGHT - when they leave you turn to joshua and say “you think they’re convinced?” and joshua says “yeah. they are.” - seungcheol and jeonghan actually do believe it at first, but after about three weeks…… they start getting a bit suspicious - you and joshua don’t hold hands or kiss or do any of those couple stuff, you guys don’t even HUG - you just tell them you’re shy because your relationship just started but you’re both starting to panic because NO THE PLAN CAN’T BE RUINED WE HAVE TO GET BACK AT THEM - one day, you exit your class to see joshua waiting for you outside the door and he does his cute eye smile when he sees you - he walks up to you and says “i told seungcheol and jeonghan we’re going on a date tomorrow. i was kinda thinking that we DO go on one since they’ll probably follow us around to see for themselves…. you know….?” and you say “oh, you’re right!! this would definitely convince them!!” - the next day, you find yourself rummaging through your entire closet looking for something cute to wear but you’re like wait - why?? it’s just joshua?? - but then you convince yourself that you’re doing this for seungcheol and jeonghan….. like it’s just to make it look like you’re actually trying…… right…… - you dress up and before leaving your dorm, you take one last look in the mirror to see how you look and then you leave to go meet up with joshua outside the building - you spot him leaning against a tree and his hair is blowing in the wind and his skin looks so dewy under this bright sun - just wow….. he looks like a model…. - and your heart may or may not have skipped a beat - when joshua spots you, he pushes himself off the tree and he walks over to you, and you quickly compose yourself because you’re pretty sure you were gaping at him - he gives you one of his deadly eye smiles and says “(name)!! how are you? you look really nice” and your ears are burning but you ignore it and answer “oh thanks, just…. threw on anything, you know……” - joshua grins “so, ready for our date?” and you’re like asjhlaks DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT but he’s like ??? but it is a date ??? - you ask “where are we going??” and he says “well, i was just thinking of spending a simple day in the city…… you know, street food, shopping, and other stuff we find on the way?? omg i hope that’s not too boring for you i’m so sorry you probably have to go study and—” - you cut him off by laughing and he just looks at you and says “uhhh did i say something funny??” and you reply “joshua, our date hasn’t even started and you’re already worrying” - and he laughs and says “my bad…. alright, so are you ready to go?” and you nod your head - you both take the bus to the city and the date…… is surprisingly going well??? - joshua takes you to this little family restaurant and the food is so good, you’re like omg joshua you have to stop me or i’ll end up ordering the entire menu - you expected it to be awkward because…. an ENTIRE day with him?? you’re going to run out of things to say - but no. joshua’s so talkative and there’s never been an awkward silence the entire meal - when you both finish, you take out your wallet to pay but joshua tells you it’s fine because of coURSE - “joshua, we aren’t even dating for real, you really don’t have to do this” - “i invited you out today and you probably have homework to catch up on, this is the least i could do for you” - you guys walk a little further down the street after leaving the restaurant to see that there’s a street market going on - and while joshua’s looking through a bunch of cute keychains and plushies, you notice two people looking at you from the corner of your eye - you subtly turn in that direction and see two people rush behind a stand of mangoes and you’re like really, seungcheol?? really, jeonghan?? i saw you guys - joshua notices you looking somewhere and he follows your gaze, but instead of focusing on the two heads popping out from behind the stand, he thinks you’re looking at this handsome boy buying street food - and he gets this look in his eyes - he quickly takes your hand in his and when you look up at him in surprise, he smiles and says “don’t pay attention to them, only look at me” - and you’re surprised of course but you’re also like…. come on, snap out of it, he’s just doing this because he saw seungcheol and jeonghan - but for the rest of the date - he doesn’t let go of your hand - you guys spend the day shopping around, and joshua even gets you guys cute matching bracelets - “you’re getting too into this fake dating stuff” - “but it’s two for one!!!!” - at the end of the day, you and joshua take the bus back to get to school and then you realize…. you’re still holding hands….. - out of embarrassment, you let go and joshua’s like ??? and you say “ohhh uh i think they gave up on following us….. hahah…..” - and joshua’s cheeks turn pink and he’s like right!!! i’m sorry!!! - you guys sit next to each other, and you find yourself slowly dozing off as you both wait for your stop - at some point you black out, but when you open up your eyes again….. you realize you’re resting your head on joshua’s shoulder - you stop yourself from jumping up and instead take this opportunity to observe his features and…. - he really is good-looking. his cute eye smile, his warm smile, his soft skin…. - you close your eyes again because you feel your face getting warm, and two stops later, joshua shakes your shoulders to wake you up - he softly says “(name), wake up, our stop’s next” and you pretend you just woke up - and you’re like wow his voice too how unfair - when you get off the bus, joshua walks you back to your dorm and you say “how much do you want to bet jeonghan and seungcheol are going to text me the second i step into my room?” - joshua says “i don’t think they will….. i think they’ll attack you in person instead” and you say “what are you talking about, no way will they be able to wait that long” - then joshua says “alright then, it’s a bet. loser pays for the next date” and you say “YOU’RE ON” - you both reach your room, and joshua says good night before leaving. you feel kind of bad since he has to walk an extra few mins to get to his, so right before he’s out of view, you say “joshua” - he turns around and says “yeah?” and you say “i say this a lot but….. you really don’t have to walk me back every time” and he just smiles and says “it’s fine. i just want to make sure you’re safe” - when you enter your room, you just smile at his words because how could someone be so kind??? - your roommate says “you’re looking really happy. did something happen??” and you say “what?? no…… not at all” - after changing into your pyjamas and plopping onto bed, you receive a text from seungcheol “HOW WAS YOUR DATE” - you win - dates become a regular thing, you and joshua go out every friday night or saturday, and he also picks you up after each one of your classes - holding hands becomes so natural, it’s not even awkward at all when you guys have to in front of jeonghan and seungcheol - this whole fake dating thing is going just as planned - but then something goes wrong - you fall for joshua - this wasn’t supposed to happen - but just one look from him sends your whole world spinning, when you hold hands with him you never want to let go, and just being with him makes you so happy - it makes you sad knowing all this is going to end in not too long - before you now it, you guys only have three weeks left before the breakup - while eating out with him, you say “alright, so what did you tell them?” and joshua says “i said that you’re giving me too much attitude nowadays” - you say “perfect, i keep telling them that you’re getting so clingy that it’s starting to annoy me. i also said we’ve been fighting lately” and joshua says “we still have to meet up secretly to plan the huge fight” and you say “ohhh you’re right” - you guys meet up to practice but you realize….. that joshua’s WAY too nice - “joshua, you have to talk back to me” - “but what if i say something that makes you sad????” - “this is pretend I KNOW YOU DON’T MEAN IT” - it gets so bad to the point that you guys actually have to write a SCRIPT to follow - the day of the breakup is here, and you and joshua are supposed to go out with seungcheol and jeonghan - you decide to meet up in their dorm room, and to make things seem awkward, you both go SEPARATELY - you take a deep breath before entering the room and it takes all your willpower not to laugh when you see joshua looking away from you - you say “hey seungcheol, hey jeonghan” and they say hi back, but they quickly realize that you didn’t acknowledge joshua - it’s quiet, until seungcheol coughs and says “so….. we should probably head to that restaurant now…..” - and you say “sure, just make sure i’m not seated next to HIM” and joshua says “i didn’t even say anything” - seungcheol says “hey, guys, don’t ruin the night, let’s just go get some food and—” - you say “I’M ruining the night??? he can’t even look me in the eye. how immature” and joshua retorts “immature? i’m not the one picking a fight over NOTHING” - jeonghan says “woah joshua, that’s not like you at all” and he says “well, some people can make others change for the worst” - you say “why don’t you just say my name, we all know you’re talking about me” and he says “you’re just going to cause trouble if i say it directly” - seungcheol and jeonghan look at each other, and they start panicking and feeling guilty because they were the ones who got you together - at some point, you just look at them and say “meant to be, huh?” which made them sink into their seats and feel even worse - you and joshua follow the script word for word, and slowly it’s getting hard to control your laughter - until - joshua says “keep going on those blind dates.” - you say “yeah? maybe i will.” - “good for you then. because that’s the only way you’ll ever find someone.” - it’s in the script. those words are in the script…. but they hurt - you’ve only ever been on blind dates with the help of seungcheol and jeonghan but without them, would you really be able to find someone? - are you really this hopeless? - this…. - lonely? - you must’ve been quiet for some time because joshua says “(name), wait. i didn’t mean that” - and you decide to end it there - you say “well i meant every word i said. i was stupid for dating you….” you then turn to seungcheol and jeonghan and say “…..almost as stupid as you two for BELIEVING US LOL” - they both say “what?? what are you talking about??” - you start laughing hysterically and you say “WE WERE PRETENDING TO DATE” - jeonghan says “WAIT THE WHOLE TIME??” and joshua laughs “the whole time” - seungcheol screams “I FELT HORRIBLE THESE PAST FEW WEEKS FOR SETTING YOU TWO UP WHEN YOU STARTED “FIGHTING” HOW COULD YOU” - and you say “GOOD THAT WAS THE POINT, I HOPE YOU NEVER LET ME GO ON ONE OF THOSE BLIND DATES AGAIN” and joshua says “SAME GOES FOR ME” - seungcheol and jeonghan are the ones to pay for the meal that evening, and afterwards, joshua walks you back to your dorm - before you enter your room, he says “i’m sorry for what i said, it was mean” and you say “it was part of the script, you have nothing to be sorry for lol” - he says “just know that…. you’re a great person, and you deserve someone as great” - his words warm your heart and you say “thanks, joshua. you too.” - he smiles and says “well…. good night, (name). it was fun.” and you say “it was. good night, joshua.” - the next day, after your morning class, you exit and you feel sad because - joshua’s not there waiting for you - why would he? - you guys aren’t “dating” anymore…… there’s no reason for him to - you tell yourself “it’s just like before we’ve met, everything’s back to normal” - but you really do start feeling lonely - because joshua isn’t there to pick you up after classes, he isn’t there to walk you back to your dorm room, he doesn’t ask you out on friday nights or saturdays, and after four months of being “together”….. - they’re all reduced to a simple “hi, how are you?” when you catch each other around campus - you hate it - seungcheol and jeonghan both notice how much sadder you seem these days, but you just tell them it’s stress from school - but it’s really because you miss joshua - you look down at the matching bracelet you have tied around your wrist and you just think of your first date and how fun it was and how happy you felt - one night, you’re unable to sleep so you decide to make a quick trip to the nearby convenience store - you buy some ramyeon and water for a quick snack, and while the cashier is ringing up your items, someone taps you on the shoulder - you turn around to see joshua and you jump in surprise - you say “joshua?? what are you doing here??” and he holds up a box of cookies and says “just getting a snack….. i couldn’t sleep” - the cashier tells you your total, but joshua places his cookies on the counter and pays for both of your things - he grabs the plastic bag and exits the store before you could say anything about it, and you follow him outside - he takes his snack out of the bag and then hands you your things, but you say “joshua, why did you pay?? how much was it?? let me pay you back” - he says “no, it’s fine, it didn’t cost a lot anyway” and you say “you really didn’t need to, i mean…. you’re not my “boyfriend” anymore” - you immediately regret saying that because it creates an awkward silence between you two - until joshua asks in a soft voice - “can i be?” - you notice his face turn red as he continues “can i be your real boyfriend?” - you freeze for a moment because joshua just confessed to you…… but when you regain your senses, you get up on your tippy-toes and kiss him right on the lips - the kiss is soft and slow, and if you can kiss him like this every day….. why. not. - you both tell seungcheol and jeonghan that you’re official, but they don’t fall for it right away - “nice try. do you guys think we’re THAT dumb???” - you prove it to them by pulling joshua by the collar and kissing him, and that’s when they really both go crazy - joshua goes back to picking you up after classes, and dates are back to being every friday night or saturday - you notice that joshua always wears the matching bracelet you both got at the street market, and it makes you smile because you haven’t taken yours off after the “breakup” either - seungcheol and jeonghan never shut up about succeeding in bringing you two together and they always joke about it - but they’re really just happy that you won’t be alone anymore - “joshua, take care of (name) for us, all right?” - “i will. i promise.”
Excerpts from interview with Johan “Shellback” Schuster (from 2015)
His artist name Shellback is fittingly from professor
Shellback in the Swedish cartoon Bamse - a logical and technical genius that
has a solution for everything. And also a person that sleeps a lot at his
workplace and may seem a bit absent.
A more intelligible way to understand how Johan thinks is to listen to his
works. “Shake It Off” with Taylor Swift was, together with Megan Trainor’s “All
About That Bass”, the song that dominated the year of pop music in 2014. If you
haven’t heard “Shake It Off” a hundred times you are obviously allergic to electricity.
Anyone who thinks there is a formula for pop hit records is a sloppy listener. The songwriters and artists that try to sound like the
others on the charts can become successful - for a while - but they soon fall
into oblivion. On the contrary, the biggest songs are those that break the norm, the ones that
do not follow any rules other than gut feeling.
It Off (billboard #1 for 4 weeks) didn’t sound like any other modern hit song
at the time of its release. The song starts with a five second long drum intro
- old fashioned acoustic drums - something that is unheard of on commercial
It is Johan playing the drums on Shake It Off. It is also Johan playing guitar, bass, keyboard and shouting in the background.
on Shake It Off is credited to Shellback, Max Martin (Johan’s discoverer and
mentor) and Taylor herself.
Johan further explains: - Shake
It off was the next to last song we recorded for the album. The other was
actually Blank Space (billboard #1 for 7 weeks). With Taylor one can work very
quickly, sometimes we wrote a song a day. When we met 6 months after our first
session we felt like there was a type of song missing.
How do you know that?
- Basically it’s a kind of pleasing frustration. How good everything feels.
We’re home, we have everything we need. But, at the same time… a feeling
of… something missing. Something that breaks from the other stuff. Something
more light-hearted. Pharrell had just released Happy and that song was on our
minds. When we worked with Taylor on the last album, which was the first time
she didn’t write everything herself, we did We Are Never Ever Getting Back
Together. It had a different feel than her other songs. It had a more fun and flirty feel to it. We felt that maybe we needed a song like that.
usually has a solid idea when she comes in, but this time we had nothing. It is
also uncommon for Martin and me to work that way. We usually come well prepared
to a session. So we just sat there. What the hell do we do now? We started
playing music to each other to get reference points. Someone that happened to
be me said, how about doing something in the same tempo as Hey Ya by Outkast?
Something faster and more drum based?
the studio there was a drum kit set up and ready to go. I went in and played
something just for fun. We later on used that very recording for the song. What
you hear is played live. We really thought of it as a sketch - all right, now
we have a tempo to work on - but it often happens that you keep the demo even
though it isn’t perfect, since there is more feeling in it. Martin was humming
something, Taylor was humming something else. There was a mellotron. I found a
brass sound and started playing something really bad on purpose (duh duh duh,
exactly what is heard on Shake It Off). Martin instantly said: “That is
awesome”. If he had not said that I would have moved on and tried something
we had didn’t really feel like chorus chords, but just as we were packing up
for the day Taylor wrote a falling melody that sounded really hooky. We still
didn’t know what it was. Is it a chorus? A verse? Me and Martin listened to it
in the car on the way home and we were shaking our heads. Is this good? Is it
shit? The next day after we had slept on it, which is the best thing you can
do, we realized that we had been humming it all morning. The rest of the song
wrote itself very naturally. Taylor wrote the lyrics in 30 minutes.
is an incredibly clever lyric, a comment to her life situation as a tabloid target.
- She is a hell of a writer, personal and broad at the same time. And the speed
of it is unreal. I don’t get how she does it. If I was to write about my life
it would be the most boring lyric in the world (starts singing the Shake It Off
melody): “I go to the studio every day…”
(Okay wow, this ended up being so much longer than I anticipated but I can say it was so much fun to write! It’s just cute and fluffy and very sappy. @croke-park-princess I hope I did this justice and it was what you wanted!)
Five times Eddie and Richie were almost caught making out, and then one time they were.
“Why are we all the way out here Richie?” Eddie asked, caution evident in his voice as he followed his boyfriend up the hill to the barn that Mike’s uncle owned. “I really don’t want to get into trouble.”
‘Don’t worry Eds, no-one’s up here at this time of day,” Richie informed him as he laced their fingers together, pulling him round to the back of the barn and pushing him up against the wall, hands cupping Eddie’s face as he brought their lips together.
Eddie’s brain short circuited for a moment before he broke the kiss, glaring at Richie, “R-Richie we- we can’t-“
“Sure we can,“ he winked and Eddie just sighed, a small smile playing on his lips before pulling him back in, this time running his tongue over Richie’s bottom lip, coaxing his lips open and his boyfriend eagerly obliged, hands resting on Eddies’ hips, rubbing soft circles into the skin beneath his shirt.
They had only started dating about three months ago. One night, Richie had come to his window just after 2am, after having had a fight with his mother once again about his sexuality. Richie had come out as gay when he was fifteen years old, Eddie being the first person he told when they were lying back on the grass of Eddie’s house, looking at the stars. At that moment Eddie wasn’t sure what his feelings were towards his best friend, but damn he knew they weren’t just platonic.
Eddie was just shy of sixteen when he came out to Richie, although no matter how much he wanted to, he didn’t say anything about how all he wanted to do was kiss that smirk off of Richie’s face.
The night that Richie had come by, he had barely been in the room two minutes before he’d pulled Eddie into a kiss and they’d never looked back. However, none of the other losers knew about their relationship, not yet anyway. Honestly both of the boys weren’t sure how they would react to seeing them as a couple, even though they were all perfectly cool with them being gay.
Richie broke off their kiss gently when the need for oxygen became too much and started a trail of soft kisses down Eddie’s jaw towards his neck when-
“I think I might have left it out back! Let me just go check!” The voice of their friend Mike echoed from around the corner and both boys jumped apart as though they’d been burned, Eddie running a hand through his hair and Richie fixing his glasses just as Mike appeared. He stopped when he saw two of his friends and blinked, “Oh hey guys. What are you two doing here?”
“Oh us? We were just looking for you Mike my man!” Richie stared talking, which always worked when he was trying to get out of a situation. It was a gift he said. “We couldn’t find you and thought maybe you actually fell down one of these holes out here!”
“Well, I didn’t. I’m right here. I just have to grab that bucket right there and then we can go yeah?“ He looked at both of the boys and they nodded simultaneously.
“Yeah, yup, sounds perfect Mike!” Eddie said quickly, cursing himself at how high his voice sounded. Mike just gave them one last look before he picked up the bucket and disappeared back around the corner. Eddie slumped against the wall and sent Richie a glare.
“So close, Richie.” Eddie said and Richie smirked.
“Your mom said the same thing to me last night!” Which earned him a much deserved smack.
2. Bill & Georgie
“This is nice,” Eddie commented as they sat in one of the back booths of the local diner. No-one questions why they are here alone as it was something they always did even before they’d gotten together.
Richie just smiled and sat Eddies plain vanilla milkshake in front of him before he started slurping at his own chocolate fudge one, “I love our friends, but it’s nice to be able to spend time just us.” This was one of the rare occasions that Richie didn’t ruin a moment with some sexual joke or a comment about his mom, instead he glanced around the empty diner and leaned across the table, kissing Eddie on the mouth.
The kiss was so gentle, almost innocent like and it made Eddie close his eyes and lean forward, his hand coming up to rest against Richie’s cheek. He felt Richie’s tongue run along his bottom lip and he parted his lips, extremely glad for the dark booth they were currently occupying.
Eddie was just about to suggest that they finish up here and go back to his house, since his mother was out at some sowing class when he heard a familiar giggle coming from the entrance.
“Bill I want strawberry! Please!” Georgie Denbrough.
“S-s-sure G-Georgie,” came the reply. Bill Debrough.
Richie couldn’t contain his groan as he sat back down at his side of the booth and smacked his head against the table. Eddie sat back and braced himself for the inevitable, which came in the form of Bill’s 10-year old little bother Georgie. “Hi Eddie! Hi Richie!” He yelled when he spotted them and pushed himself into the booth next to Eddie.
Bill joined them a few minutes later with their milkshakes and even Richie couldn’t be mad at the younger Denbrough brother, just like everyone else, he had a soft spot for Georgie.
Everyone knew how protective the losers were over him too, especially after there was a scare a few years ago when he’d been swept up in the storm and into the sewers. Everyone thanked their lucky stars that there was a fisherman down by the barrens that evening who found him and called an ambulance. Bill’s never let him go out and play on his own during a storm again, even if his parents did say that Georgie would have learned from his mistake. He wasn’t taking the risk, and neither were any of the others.
Eddie met Richie’s gaze as he finally looked up from Georgie and he gave him a gentle smile, his leg reaching out to brush along Richie’s. Richie’s breath hitched slightly, unheard by Bill and Georgie and he felt a very faint blush cross his cheeks as the first thought that popped into his head was I love you.
Yeah. He was in love with Eddie Kaspbrak.
They were in Eddie’s bedroom, legs tangled together and fingers entwined. Eddie was laying half on top of Richie and Richie’s hand had taken up a permanent position in Eddie’s hair, messing it up as he tugged on it. Their lips were firmly pressed together, tongues lazily dancing against eachother’s. Their kisses weren’t heated, not in that way anyway, but Eddie was becoming short of breath as he pulled away only for air, his lips staying a mere few inches from his boyfriends.
Even though Richie had his revelation that he was, to put it bluntly, head over heals in love with Eddie, he hadn’t actually figured out how he was going to tell him. He certainly didn’t want to scare Eddie off but he also wasn’t sure how much longer he could go without telling his boyfriend how he really felt.
“Did you know that tomorrow it’ll be exactly four months since we started dating?” Eddie whispered softly which earned him a rare smile from Richie.
“Four months eh? Maybe I’ll let you get lucky tomorrow Eds, you know, to celebrate!” His eyebrows waggled and Eddie scoffed, giving him a nudge, but not enough to actually separate them.
“You wish Tozier, and don’t call me Eds!” he quipped back, even though they both knew he secretly loved it when Richie called him that. Eddie knew it was all just playful teasing, as they had already had that discussion and they both agreed that they weren’t quite ready for that. They also agreed that if either one of them felt like they were ready for the next step, they’d talk to one another.
Richie just winked and nudged at his nose, tilting his head up so he could press their mouths back together, prying his lips apart and running his fingers back through Eddies soft, perfect hair-
“Eddie?” The voice of Beverly Marsh bounced off the walls of his bedroom and Eddie was quick to throw Richie off of his body, sending him toppling to the floor as he sat up on his bed, smirking as Richie cursed in annoyance from his spot on the floor.
“Why? Why are our friends suck cock-blocks?” Richie groaned to himself, only to earn harsh ‘shh’ from Eddie and a pillow to the face as Beverly walked into the room.
“Sorry to interrupt your little hangout but I need help with my school project Eddie, it’s on health and I know you are the best person to talk to when it comes to that.” Beverly sat on the bed, on the spot that was previously occupied by Richie and he had to force back a growl. It wasn’t her fault, she didn’t know that they were in the middle of some EddieRichie alone time. “That’s my cue to depart!” Richie said dramatically, heading for the door, “I’ll be sure to give your mom a kiss on my way out Eds.” He laughed and ducked out of the door just in time before the pillow hit him again.
“Don’t call me that!”
It was one rainy Saturday and all of the Losers Club were sitting in Bills basement that had been renovated into some sort of den for everyone to hang out in. They were all spread out over the sofas and chairs as the movie played. They had all settled on watching Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, which was everyones favourite Star Wars movie. They were about half way through the movie when Richie noted that they had run out of snacks. He’d seen the movie plenty of times so he stretched out his legs and stood up, “We’re out of snacks, I am going to go on a very important mission to retrieve more!” He announced, earning a few cheers from the group and Eddie glanced to the side and stood up also.
“I’ll help, there is no way you’ll be able to carry all those snack down the stairs without spilling them everywhere and we can’t have that can we?” He stood up and all but dragged Richie out of the room and up the stairs to the kitchen. No-one seemed to have noticed thank goodness, and Eddie was glad that Bills parent’s had taken Georgie to swimming lessons this afternoon.
The second the kitchen door swung shut, Eddie was pulling Richie down by the collar of his shirt and pressing their mouths together. Richie, albeit surprised, went along with it, never passing up an opportunity to make out with his boyfriend. He pushed him back towards the counter and Eddie jumped when his back collided with the counter.
Without putting too much thought into his next move, Richie’s hands moved down to Eddie’s thighs and picked him up, settling him down on the counter, without even disconnecting their lips. When Eddie let out a squeak at being lifted, Richie took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, moulding their tongues together. He groaned as he felt Eddie’s fingers in his hair and he pulled apart for air, kissing his way down Eddie’s jaw to his neck. “N-no marks remember,” Eddie breathed out and Richie just hummed.
“Got it sir.” He used a hand to mock salute him and placed soft kisses all the way down to his collarbone and back up again to his lips. His other hand went into Eddie’s own hair, messing it up. He broke apart again and Richie looked at Eddie with soft eyes, “Eddie I-“
Suddenly the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs vibrated through the kitchen, cutting his words off and Richie wretched himself away from Eddie, quickly putting the popcorn onto the stove and he tried to make it look like he hadn’t just been making out with Eddie.
Stan appeared into the kitchen and stared blankly at the two boys, faces flushed and hair sticking up. He frowned and went into the fridge for a bottle of water, eyes never leaving his two friends until he cleared his throat speaking up, “Were you two fighting?” He asked curiously and Eddie scoffed. "What? No- Richie was just um-“ Eddie found he didn’t even have a decent excuse for why they were in the state that they were, and he was about to sigh in defeat and admit the truth when Richie spoke up.
“I was tickling him, we all know how much Eds hates to be tickled, eh Eddie Spaghetti?” He winked in his direction and Eddie relaxed, and so did Stan. He just rolled his eyes at them both and retreated back to the den with his water with a call of,
“Remember the snacks!”
To say that Richie Tozier hated homework was the understatement of the century. He was currently huddled up in the library, surrounded by loads of history books that he needed to use for his extra credit class. He needed this grade in order to graduate high school in the summer. He’d be damned if he was staying in Derry one more year.
His eyes just happened to look up to the door just as his favourite person in the world walked in and smirked in his direction and nodded his head towards the bookshelves as he disappeared. God, his boyfriend was going to be the death of him. He closed up his books, being careful to mark the pages and he followed Eddie to behind the dead section of the library. “I thought you were volunteering today?” Richie asked.
It was a Friday evening and Eddie always volunteers at the local animal shelter for two hours, as his own form of extra credit. “I was, but we shut up early tonight, apparently there’s a storm coming. I came here to ask if you wanted to spend the night since your parents are out of town?”
Instead of answering, Richie leaned in and closed the distance between them, prying Eddie’s lips apart softly as they kissed. This one wasn’t like any of the other ones they’d shared over the past few weeks, this one was more…caring. More loving.
The kiss made Eddie shiver and he reached up to ground himself by clutching to Richie’s shoulders. He closed his eyes and moved a hand around to the back of Richie’s neck, fingers playing with the curls that rested there. “Richie? The other day there…in Bills kitchen you were going to say something, what was it?”
Richie froze and he racked his brain for a response, “I was just going to ask how your mom likes it in bed,” he blurted out before he shook his head, interrupting Eddie’s response that was about to come from the smaller boys mouth. “Wait no, that’s not what I was going to say. Fuck-“ he cursed and ran a hand through his hair, “Eddie, the thing is I think I’m-“
“I think the book is round here Mrs James,” Ben’s voice filled the silence and Richie cursed at being interrupted during an important conversation again, but he composed himself, and grabbed a book from the shelf, just as Ben rounded the corner, eyes brightening up when he saw them. “Hey guys! Oh Ritchie look you’ve found just the book I was looking for!”
Richie looked down at the book, and made a face as the title read, “Fun games to play with your pussy.” He snorted and handed over the book to Ben, who handed it to an older lady. “Fun games alright, I bet she doesn’t even have a cat!” He nudged Eddie when the lady had gone, earning a look from Ben.
“Actually she has five.” He paused, “See you guys later!” He waved and vanished as quickly as he had arrived. Richie turned to Eddie, hopeful to finish their conversation, only to find Eddie was already making his way back into the public eye.
Maybe next time.
+1. Georgie + Everyone
School dances sucked, it was all about dressing up in nice looking clothes and drinking awful tasting punch as your teachers made sure you weren’t doing anything inappropriate in the empty hallways. Richie thought they were cheesy and uncomfortable, but Eddie, Eddie loved them. He liked being able to go to the dances with all his friend and have a good time.
So Richie went along with it. Even though they weren’t going together they were still going and Richie would be damned if he wasn’t sneaking in a dance with Eddie at some point during that night.
They were all meeting at Bill’s, since his parents were the most invested of all their parents and they insisted on taking photos. Richie stood on their porch, tugging at the tie he’d borrowed from his dad around his neck. His palms were sweaty and he reached up to knock on the door and a few minutes later it was opened by Georgie, who was grinning.
“You’re the last one to get here!” The ten year old announced and pulled him inside the house. The second he passed through the doors his eyes landed on Eddie and he swallowed thickly. It was becoming harder and harder to hide their relationship from everyone, just as hard as it was becoming for him not to scream out how much he was in love with Eddie for all his friends to hear.
His thoughts were interrupted by Bill’s mom as she nudged him forward, camera at the ready to take some pictures of the group. Once all the pictures were taken everyone headed down to the den for a bit as the dance didn’t start for a few hours. Eddie and Richie stayed behind, in the Denbrough’s living room as Bill’s parents left to go up to their bedroom.
“You look really good Richie,” Eddie said softly.
“I love you.” Was Richie’s response, making Eddie choke on his own breath slightly. He was glad in that moment at he didn’t need to use his inhaler anymore.
“W-what?” Eddie gasped out, trying to regain control and Richie repeated his words.
“I love you, I have done for a while now, that- that’s what I wanted to tell you earlier in the librar-“ his words were cut off by Eddie’s mouth on his and before he could even return the kiss a voice broke through.
“I knew it!” The voice belonged to Georgie, who was jumping up and down clapping his hands. “I knew it!”
Eddie’s face had gone bright red at the realisation that the cat was indeed, out of the bag and they had been caught by a ten year old. Georgie didn’t wait before dashed off down the stairs, off to tell everyone else of his knew found discovery. Eddie quickly turned to Richie, a smile on his face and as he could hear the multiple footsteps running up the stairs he whispered back, “I love you too.”
Richie’s face broke out in a shit-eating grin and he moved closer to Eddie and whispered, “Fuck it,” pulling Eddie into, what he would describe as and earth-shattering kiss, just as the rest of the loser’s club piled into the living room.
“You owe me twenty bucks guys. I told you Richie wasn’t ‘tickling’ Eddie that day when we were watching Star Wars.” Stan’s voice broke through the haze and both boys turned around in shock. “Seriously, you guys need to work on your lying skills.” All the losers groaned and each of them handed Stanley twenty bucks each and turned on his heels, handing the money to Georgie, who grinned.
“I knew way back when we joined you for milkshakes. You were nudging each others feet under the table. I remember watching a movie with mommy and the couple in that were doing that.” He explained and everyone groaned.
“I guess we weren’t so subtle after all, eh Eds?” Richie nudged him and he flushed red.
“Don’t call me Eds,” he shot back before his face softened. “No, I guess we weren’t.”
They heard the car that had come to pick them up for the dance honk outside and one by one each of the losers headed outside and piled into the car, leaving Eddie and Richie alone again. “I love you Eddie Spaghetti,” Richie said fondly and instead of correcting him, Eddie just smiled.
Just hear me out
There’s this one all-star team. One if them is a DJ at the club and the other is a small-time rapper. They’ve been dancing for a long time and have quite the reputation.
They’re Team Analogical. Anxiety and Logic.
Anthony and Logan, best friends since pre-k. They’ve been the champs for a long time, ever since they beat Tag Team, one of their favorite rivals.
Then, there’s this new team.
Prince and Morality.
Not much is really known about them??
Anthony is convinced that Prince is that one rich kid what was his name? Roman?
Logan rolls his eyes and says he’d be just as pompous here as he was in school if they were one in the same.
Roman is /panicking/
Patton the cute boy in math class is there and he’s really good and oh my god he likes me but he’s not a fan of me at school and oh gosh he’s so talented and Patton are you listening
That Logic is pretty cute huh
Basically these two “mystery characters” are total nerd pining over their self proclaimed arch rivals (thanks Roman) (I apologized!)
Tag Team gas figured all of this out and is trying to get them together but it’s /not working/
Missy we gotta do it
Peter no this is a terrible idea
No, no it’s great
We are not using my little brother in one of your schemes
OKAY FINE BUT YOU OWE ME
Peter and Missy are in their study group
At first none of them have any clue
Missy figures it out first
Hey most amazing little brother
Oh, god, what
We ship these guys together right-
You mean Prinxiety and Logicality?
The internet, Miss. The internet. So, you two know my price, right?
Missy looks at Peter
I’ll get it to you tomorrow. /After/ you’ve done the thing.
Steven (Imaj) smiles
Later that night
LOGAN WHERE IS OUR MAKE UP
I DON’T KNOW
WHERE IS OUR MAKE UP
… Oh no
*high pitched screaming*
… I don’t know where to go from here but Imma write somethin’ up during Creative Writing.
You take the file Natasha’s holding out to you and flip it open to see a familiar setting. “Why are we going to Star City?”
“There’s a growing crime ring there that could turn into a terrorist threat,” Steve explains.
“Who’s Damien Dark?” Sam asks, flipping through his own file. You, Sam, Steve, Natasha, and Wanda are the only ones going on this mission. At least for now.
“We suspect he’s the crime ring’s leader.” Natasha pulls up a picture of him on the projection monitor. “For the past couple of weeks, he’s either been unable to track down, or at social gatherings.” She looks over at you. “He’s been at every single one of your boyfriend’s campaign events.”
You swallow nervously. Oliver still doesn’t know you’re an Avenger. He’s already been through enough, he doesn’t need a possible evil overlord after him and a superhero girlfriend. “Okay, so what’s the game plan?” you ask.
“We,” Steve starts, “will be undercover in Star City until we can’t be anymore. We’ll be supporting Mr. Queen’s campaign. Wanda will go through Damien’s mind at each event so we know if he’s guilty, and, possibly, what he’s up to.” He locks eyes with Wanda, who stands next to you with her arms crossed. “Is that alright?”
She nods. “I can do it.”
The corner of Steve’s mouth twitches up in a smile at her words. “All right, we’ll head out in fifteen minutes so we can make Queen’s next event. ”
“Steve,” Sam says, “what about the Green Arrow?”
Natasha and Steve exchange a look that makes you frown.
“We tried to contact the vigilante so we could work with him, but got no response,” Natasha says. “We’re on our own for now.”
“Hey.” You smile, walking up to where Thea stands in the front row of Oliver’s supporters. The younger girl smiles brightly and hugs you.
“Hey!” She squeals, pulling away from the hug, but keeping her hands on your shoulders. “Where have you been? It’s been months!”
You sigh. “My job’s kept me tied up in a bad way.” Your eyes flicker over to where Steve stands at the edge of the crowd, the World War II veteran hat Natasha got him perched on his head. His undercover get up sucks, as usual. “In fact, I’m here on business.”
Thea frowns slightly. “What kind of–”
She’s cut off as Oliver takes the stage in the new music hall, smiling and waving as the crowd cheers and cameras flash. “I’ll tell you later!” You yell to Thea over the commotion. She nods.
“Good evening, everyone,” Oliver greets, smiling at the crowd. His eyes flit over you once before resting on you, making his smile brighten. “It’s great to see you all here.” You can’t help the smile that comes over your face at the way he’s looking at you.
“As you probably know, I am here to support the opening of this beautiful new Star City Music Hall here in the Glades. Earlier this year, it was–”
You feel a tug on your right sleeve and turn your head to see Wanda with wide eyes flashing quickly from scarlet to brown. “Wanda, what’s wrong?” You whisper, taking hold of her elbow in case she gets weak. “Wanda?”
Thea comes at your side. “Hey, is she okay?”
“She’s fine.” You wince at how quickly you responded. “This is my colleague. She doesn’t do well in crowds, I’ll be right back.”
Thea nods with worried eyes and you wrap your arm around Wanda’s waist, half-carrying her over to the entrance of a hallway. “What’s wrong, Wanda? What is it?”
Sam walks up to you, sporting a red hat and a casual jacket and jeans. “Damien is here, but something … Something is wrong with it. It’s twisted and dark, (y/n). It’s making me dizzy.”
“Do you see anything about him? Anything important?” Sam asks.
Wanda shakes her head. “Nothing. Except …” Her eyes suddenly widen, her irises all scarlet as she sits there, quietly shaking.
You shake her shoulder, getting increasingly more worried. “Wanda? Wanda are you okay?”
She continues to shake uncontrollably, and you and Sam share a worried look. “What do we do?” he asks.
Suddenly, the floor shakes with the force of an explosion, and the sound of gunshots comes from the hall. You gently lower Wanda to the floor as Sam runs to look at what’s going on. You follow, looking around the corner to see complete chaos.
People are fleeing in all directions, and masked men with guns are firing into the crowd. Oliver is nowhere to be seen, which terrifies you. You glance behind you to see Wanda in the same state, before seeing Felicity running towards you.
“Felicity!” You yell. Running forward, you take her arm and pull her behind cover. Sam pulls out his gun and guards the entrance as you pull the surprisingly calm blonde towards Wanda. “Please watch her, something’s wrong and I have to go.”
Felicity nods before glancing at Wanda and doing a double take. “Is that … ?” Then she looks at Sam’s crappy undercover outfit and back at you, putting two and two together. “Oh my god.”
You smile nervously. “I’ll be back.”
Then you run into the fray after Sam, pulling on your wrist braces as you do.
Sam grins, walking towards where Diggle stands on the other side of the lair. “Looks like neither of us really got out of the good fight.”
“Can’t escape.” Dig laughs, shaking his old army buddy’s hand. He sees Steve standing beside Sam and shakes the captain’s hand. “Even after a lifetime.”
Steve laughs dryly, and the three veterans look around the room. Felicity, Thea, Wanda, and Natasha are all talking around the computers as Felicity tries to track the terrorists. Wanda has a blanket around her shoulders, and is still shaking slightly. She doesn’t know what happened to her at the music hall, only that Damien caused it somehow. According to her, he must have known that she was in his mind somehow.
All of the information she gathered from him was erased.
While the two teams have gotten along well so far, the couple at the other end of the room has been in a quiet argument for two hours. They were silent on the ride to the lair, silent for the first half hour, and finally, they went and talked and haven’t stopped. The others are doing their best to ignore it.
“So, what’re they usually like when they’re together?” Sam asks, looking away from you and Oliver and back at Diggle. “(y/n) talks about Oliver all the time, but …”
Dig smiles a bit. “They’re great. Whenever (Y/n)’s in town, Oliver’s the happiest. I just wish he would’ve told her about his nightly activities. And that she told him.”
Steve nods. “(Y/n)’s so strict about keeping her identity secret. She’s never told me why.” The three are silent as they look at the other end of the room. Steve clears his throat. “Well, since they’re a bit caught up at the moment, we should probably discuss some sort of plan.” The other two men agree, and they begin discussing battle strategies.
On the other side of the large room, (y/n) steps away from Oliver, arms crossing over her chest. “I just don’t understand why you didn’t tell me.”
He holds up a finger, eyes narrowing at her. “You have no right to say that to me. You did the same thing.”
“I was going to tell you today. After your conference. But then some psychos decided to shoot up the place, so I didn’t really get the chance.”
Oliver’s angry gaze doesn’t falter from you and you sigh, stepping forward and interlacing both of your hands with his. “Look, I love you, Oliver, and I really don’t want this to come between us. We both kept secrets, and we both know everything now, so can we please just promise each other that we won’t lie anymore and move on?”
You pause, looking down at your hands. “I already hardly see you, I don’t want to lose you forever.”
He untangles his right hand’s fingers from your left’s and gently cups your chin, making you look up at him. “No more secrets?”
You shake your head.
“And you’ll keep me updated?”
You nod. “And you’ll keep me updated?”
He nods. You smile a little bit.
Oliver smiles softly. “So we’re good?”
You laugh. “Yes, Ollie, we’re good.”
Still smiling, he leans down and kisses you softly. You tangle your fingers in his hair and kiss him back for a few seconds before pulling away. The two of you just sway back and forth for a couple of seconds, foreheads touching.
Summary: AU. Reader is given the task of running a
popular love advice internet show when her coworker is fired. Her
cynical attitude toward love makes her offer some harsh advice, and more
than a few hearts are caught in the aftermath. Will hers be one of them?
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Word Count: 3,460
language, fluff, hot firemen, drinking, (one) sexual innuendo, sarcasm, advice-giving for sad situations
I got so mad that I accidentally deleted my effing chapter. All your lovely notes and comments are gone; I’m sorry. This is a repost. I’m not retagging.
Summary: School AU with Park Woojin and many many other produce 101 (season 1 and 2) contestants.
Author’s note: im trying something new and am doing different perspectives, one from your side and one from woojin’s side… hopefully this’ll turn out how i want. thanks to everyone who supports my writing! lmk if i should continue or not :-)
It was your first day of school and things were looking okay. You had just gotten on the bus and had found an empty seat near the middle. Looking around, you saw an old couple, a businessman, a pregnant mother, and another boy who was wearing the same school uniform as you. This isn’t too bad…
Because you lived a little bit far from school there was at least 15 minutes until you would get to school not including the stops in between. You leaned against the window and studied the buildings and people that passed by you, trying to minimize any anxiety you had about starting school in a completely new environment.
About halfway through the ride, another boy and girl in the same school uniform as you boarded the bus. You made eye contact with the girl who gave you a warm smile before sitting next to the two boys in the back. Even though you were a few rows in front of them you couldn’t help but listen to their whispers behind you.
“Do you think she’s a freshman? I mean she looks a little bit more mature than that…”
“She might’ve just moved here. Ay Somi, if she’s in our grade do you think I could date her? She’s pretty cute– Ow! What’d you smack me for?”
“You think you’re all that Park Jihoon. Even if you’re willing to date her doesn’t mean she’s willing to date you.”
Jihoon scoffed. “Who wouldn’t be willing to date me?”
After the bus got to school and you found your homeroom with ease, you were relieved to see the girl you assumed was Somi walk into the class. She greeted her friends before walking over to talk to you. “Hey, I saw you on the bus this morning and I don’t mean for this to sound mean but I didn’t recognize you, are you new?” She gave you the same bright smile you saw on the bus and you couldn’t help but smile back.
“Yeah I moved here a few weeks ago. I’m y/n.”
“I’m Somi! I’ll introduce you to my friends Yoojung and Doyeon over there after class and we can eat lunch together if you want!”
You let out a sigh of relief. “I’d love to eat lunch with you. Honestly I was worried I wouldn’t have anywhere to sit.”
“Ah don’t worry about it! You’re one of our friends now. If you need help with adjusting here or anything really, just ask.”
Between classes and during lunch you were happy to find that conversations with Somi, Yoojung, and Doyeon ran smoothly and you all laughed and talked as if you had known each other for years. You four exchanged numbers and even made a new group chat. Although their friendliness was extremely unexpected, you gladly accepted it.
On the ride home, Somi invited you to sit next to the two other boys you had seen earlier. “Hey guys, this is y/n, she’s new here. Y/N, this is Jihoon and Woojin.”
“Nice to meet you!” Jihoon flashed you a smile.
“Yeah, hi.” Woojin nodded his head before turning his head towards the window.
You were a bit taken back by Woojin’s response but didn’t take it personally. I mean you were sort of intruding their friend group all of a sudden, and it wasn’t like he was supposed to be as friendly as everyone else you had met. He’s probably shy, you thought. To your relief, conversations ran smoothly once again as you, Somi, and Jihoon ranted nonstop about how mean your teachers were before they had to leave at their stop.
“Hey Woojinah, be nice to y/n!” Jihoon giggled before Somi pushed him off of the bus.
“Bye y/n! Text me later!”
You awkwardly laughed before turning around to talk to Woojin, only to see him putting on a pair of headphones and closing his eyes. You didn’t know what to do for a few seconds but just retreated to looking at your phone for the rest of the ride until you got off.
Woojin boarded the bus, excited to start school after a long hard summer of working nonstop teaching a dance workshop to younger kids. Even though he rarely showed his emotions, Woojin was genuinely happy thinking about seeing his friends again. After one stop, Woojin noticed a girl he had never seen before wearing the same school uniform as him walk onto the bus. She looked around before sitting near the middle of the bus.
Woojin wondered who she was, but didn’t think too much about it. She’s probably new here. Woojin thought to himself. After a few more stops, Woojin’s face lit up as he saw two of his best friends Somi and Jihoon waiting at the bus stop.
“Woojin, we missed you so much! How was your summer?” Somi asked.
“It was okay I guess. Pretty tiring though so I’m glad I’m done working. What about you guys?”
“Me and Jihoon spent the summer volunteering at the animal shelter.” Somi started laughing. “You should have seen him trying to wash the cats.”
“Hey! It’s not my fault they don’t like water…” Jihoon pouted. “But I don’t think this is the most important thing we could be talking about right now…”
“What are you talking about?” Woojin glanced up at Jihoon. He loved these two with all his heart but he did not want to be dragged into the gossip that Jihoon and Somi seemed to love so much and after spending months away from them he just wanted to hear their stories about the animal shelter not about who dated who and who wore what.
Jihoon nodded his head towards the girl that Woojin had forgotten about. “Oh yeah, I noticed her. She got on a stop after me.”
“Do you think she’s a freshman? I mean she looks a little bit more mature than that…” Somi tried to get a good look at you but you had your back towards them.
“She might’ve just moved here. Ay Somi, if she’s in our grade do you think I could date her? She’s pretty cute– Ow!” Woojin laughed as Jihoon retreated away from Somi and hugged Woojin. “What’d you smack me for?”
“You think you’re all that Park Jihoon. Even if you’re willing to date her doesn’t mean she’s willing to date you.”
Jihoon scoffed. “Who wouldn’t be willing to date me?”
Woojin tuned out the rest of Somi and Jihoon’s bickering and found himself watching you for the rest of the bus ride. Woojin jumped a little bit,
scared that you had caught him staring as you turned to your backpack to take out some lip balm. Although he could barely see you, Woojin noticed himself admiring the way your hair gently fell over your face, the way you kept adjusting your uniform, the way you got surprised every time the bus ran over a speed bump….
Woojin sighed, running his fingers through his hair. He reminded himself that relationships only hurt people in the end and he shouldn’t try to pursue one or even catch feelings for you to begin with. He remembered watching Somi go through the worst breakup he had ever seen about a year ago, and how him and Yoojung spent days trying to cheer her up. He couldn’t imagine letting himself or anyone else go through that pain.
“Earth to Woojin?! We’re here!” Woojin realized he had been too absorbed in his thoughts to see that the bus had stopped in front of the school.
“Sorry guys I’m just a little tired today. Slept late finishing the summer homework.” Woojin walked past you and although he was too shy to see what you looked like, the whiff of your vanilla perfume made him blush.
Woojin sat in the back of his homeroom class, and scanned around to see who he’d have to spend the rest of the year with. Even though Jihoon wasn’t in the same class as him, Woojin noticed that Somi and most of her girlfriends were. “Park Woojin, is that you?” He looked up to see one of his closest childhood friends, Daehwi, sit next to him.
“Daehwi! Long time no see!” Woojin smiled widely, glad that his best friend was in his class. “How’s it going?”
“Really good! I’m so glad you’re in this class with me. I was scared I’d be stuck with only Somi. I love her but she always gets me in trouble with the teacher for talking too much.” Daehwi sighed before noticing you from across the room. “Hey who’s that. Is she new? I’ve never seen her before.”
“Yeah, she was on the same bus as me, Somi, and Jihoon.”
Once the class started, he found himself looking over to you every time you talked, coughed, moved, breathed, existed. He studied your mannerisms, the things you laughed at, the things that made you nervous, everything. Woojin couldn’t understand why you caught his eye so much, but the vanilla perfume he smelled as he passed by you earlier was all that was on his mind.
After school ended, Woojin rushed to the bus so he wouldn’t have to face talking to you in case you ended up bumping into each other. Thankful, Woojin was happy that he had made it on before you did. He would not let a girl he hadn’t even spoken a word to suddenly take over his life and distract him when he was busy with school and dance.
Jihoon sat next to him, giving him a confused look. “What’s up with you today Woojin? You’re never this.. this urgent to get on the bus.”
“I’m just tired–”
“Hey guys, this is y/n, she’s new here. Y/N, this is Jihoon and Woojin.”
SOMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woojin glared at Somi. All of that work to avoid who he now knew as y/n, was gone to waste.
“Nice to meet you!” Jihoon flashed you a smile before nudging Woojin.
“Yeah, hi.” Woojin nodded his head before turning his head towards the window. He obviously knew what you looked like now, but he knew that even one second of eye contact could make him go crazy.
Woojin blocked out the conversation next to him and tried not to think about how when you walked on the bus with Somi he was taken back by how good you looked in the school uniform that so many people thought was ugly. He tried not to think about how your laugh made his heart flutter. He tried not to think about how jealous he got when you got friendly with Jihoon and slapped his arm when he said something funny. He tried not to think about how the smell of your vanilla perfume lingered in his head, reminding him of warmth and comfort.
I LIVE for Keith trying to make a move and Lance just Not Getting It
“Lance, what would you do if you had a serious crush on someone?” “Well, I think I’d just be straight up about it. Just say, ‘hey, I have a crush on you. Do you think we could make this work?’” “Hey, I have a crush on you. Do you think we can make this work?” *slapping Keith on the back* “Yeah, exactly like that! So who do you have a crush on, dude?” “I can’t with you right now”
Trying to be Lowkey about them dating and failing miserably
“Lance, do you know why Keith upset?” “Why would you ask me? It’s not like he’s my boyfriend or anything! We’re not even friends! He’s my rival! He’s-” “I asked you because we’re going around the table and asking everyone if they know why Keith is upset.” “Oh.”
*Keith and Lance emerge from Lance’s room, hair and clothes mussed* “What were you two-” “WE WERE BAKING BROWNIES” “…..in Lance’s bedroom” “…….yes”
One day they’re doing their whole “we hate each other no really we do” routine and Pidge is Done and just goes “we saw you two kissing. You’re really gay. We get it. We don’t give a shit, but you should know, just for the record, that you aren’t slick and frankly I had bet that you two would make out about a week earlier than you did, so now I owe Hunk twenty bucks and I’m upset about it”
Horrible flirting during battle
“Keith, use out your sword!” “Oh I’d let Keith use his sword on me any day” *collective groaning and gagging*
Teaching each other little bits and phrases in their native language, and them repeating it back to each other over and over again until Lance can say “I love you” perfectly in Korean and Keith can say it perfectly in Spanish
WEARING EACH OTHERS CLOTHING HAPPENS OFTEN AND I THANK THE LORD EVERY DAY
“Pidge, let me tell you a thing or two about relationships” “Lance you have been dating Keith for about two weeks and he has threatened to dump you twelve times so literally shut the fuck up”
The entire team acts like they hate how lovey dovey they are, but really Hunk and Coran help Keith make cakes for Lance on anniversaries and Allura and Pidge always offer to help Lance make Keith little gifts and Shiro is a full time couples counselor and would do anything to keep the lovebirds relationship thriving
Fighting over stupid ass things
“You asked me if I was team Instinct, Keith. Instinct.” “So?” “So? So??? CLEARLY I am team VALOR jesus christ I can’t even look at you right now”
Lance endlessly comparing them to couples in pop culture
“He’s the Jay Z to my Beyonce, the Juliet O’Hara to my Shawn Spencer, the Aang to my Katara, the Miranda Lambert to my Blake Shelton-” “Wait, didn’t they get a divorce?” “Pidge I swear to fucking god”
Lance loves making Keith blush. Loves. It. Will do it as much as possible. It is his main source of joy in life.
“My type is a man who could kick my ass” -Lance probably
Alright this is getting long so I’m gonna end it here! I hope this is what you were looking for, Anon!
Can you do an imagine based around the saying “right person, wrong time” with y/n and simon! And it can be as angsty as you want ☺️
i realllllly loved this request but i’m not quite sure i did it right. hope you all like it anyway!
requests are open!
love you all xo
The bed felt empty. However, it wasn’t, Simon lay at least a foot away from you on the very edge of the bed with his back facing you. You could tell he wasn’t asleep and you weren’t sure whether that was a good or bad sign.
Your gaze never left the ceiling as you replayed the fight you two had only hours before over and over and over again in your head like a twisted movie.
“Do you know what you are, (Y/N)? You’re selfish! Always thinking of yourself and not giving anybody else a thought!” Simon yelled, his hands moving wildly like they always did when he was angry and emphasising his points.
“I’m selfish?!” You laughed in complete disbelief, “just because I’m thinking of myself for once? I’m selfish for wanting to do something with my career? If anyone here is selfish, it’s you! This has been my dream job for as long as I can remember and you don’t want me to go for it.”
Simon slammed his hands down onto the kitchen island in front of him causing you to jump slightly. “I never said I didn’t want you to go for it, I just said that long distance wouldn’t work. It never does!”
“Are you saying that after three years together, we can’t survive a long distance relationship?”
“(Y/N), the jobs in America! It’s not exactly round the corner, is it?” He banged his hands against the table again and after a few seconds of him calming himself down a little, he shrugged. “There’s plenty of jobs in Britain.”
“You are unbelievable!” You were the one to slam your hands onto the counter this time. “This is important to me, Simon, I can’t believe that you’re so against me moving forward with my career! I would never stop you from doing anything with Youtube and you know that, I have supported you every step of the way with it. Why can’t you do the same for me?”
The two of you held each other in an intense stare for what felt like an eternity before Simon sighed and dropped his gaze to the counter. His eyes glanced back up to yours as his voice came out in a whisper, “are you willing to throw away this relationship for a job?”
You furrowed your eyebrows as you took a step away from the counter, giving your boyfriend a look of exasperation. “I’m not the one throwing this relationship away; you are”
Without warning, Simon turned around to face you and confirmed your suspicions that he hadn’t been asleep. His tired eyes immediately softened once he caught sight of your tear stained cheeks and he reached forward, grabbing your hand in his before pulling you into his chest and wrapping his arms around you tightly.
“I love you, (Y/N), so much and I’m never going to stop loving you,” his voice sounded croaky as he spoke into your ear, “and that is exactly why I have to let you go.”
You shook your head as you pulled away slightly to look up into his eyes, “no, Si, that’s not what I want.”
“I know and it’s not what I want either. But we both need time to grow as people, think about what we want and to progress in our careers. Long distance will ruin us and I love what we have too much for it to all end over the phone when we both realise that it’s not working.”
Tears streamed down your face and Simon gently wiped them away, “but, hey, in a few years when we’ve both got our heads together, it might finally be the right time for us. That’s all we need, (Y/N), time.”
Rain bashed against the windows of your new apartment as you unpacked one of the many boxes that filled your living room. So much for sunny skies, you thought with a roll of your eyes as you silently cursed the weather app for giving you false hope.
Your ringtone echoed around the room and you answered it with a smile once you saw the name of your best friend flash across the screen. “Josh, I’ve not even been gone a day and you already miss me?”
“Well, of course I do, but that’s not the reason I’m calling,” Josh’s voice sounded worried and you immediately placed the photo frame you was unpacking back into the box before moving towards your couch.
“Simon hasn’t left his room since yesterday and we’ve been all dying to know what happened, but he won’t tell us.” Good job you were right in front of the couch because the mention of your ex boyfriend’s name made your legs fall from beneath you.
Trying your best to make your voice not sound shaky and failing, you asked, “how would I know what’s been up with him? We haven’t spoken in a month.”
The line went quiet for a moment before Josh cleared his throat, “not even yesterday?” He asked slowly, almost like he knew something that you didn’t.
“What’s going on?” You decided not to beat around the bush, your heart couldn’t handle anymore suspense as it felt like it was about to burst right out of your chest.
“Simon went to the airport yesterday, he wanted to catch you before your flight and ask if the both of you could try and make it work,” Josh sighed. “I’m guessing he never made it on time.”
Your breath got caught in your throat at Josh’s words and you thought back to Simon’s words from the night you broke up. All you needed was time, and you both never seemed to have enough.
Beca, I've done it. I've found a new Bella and she's dope. Her name is Emily Junk. Emily!
The big BM! Captain, two things: one, it is an absolute honor to meet you. Two, who is that hot Treble dude out there? Because honestly, daaaaaaamn!
Uh, take a seat.
Right, here we go.
You got her right here. Leave a message after the beep.
Why do I want you as the new Bella?
For starters, access to the illest alumnae clubs. And that's just for starters. I will work for you. I'll be on you 24/7. I'll be like your family. I'm here when you get here in the morning, sure enough, I'll be there tucking you into bed at night. Don't worry, it's not gay. Do we have questions?
I think our only question is when can you start?
Right now. Let's do it.
Thank you for coming in. We will talk.
Cool. I feel good about this. Hey, you know you can hit me up on Facebook anytime day or night, you know that right?
Take care, Legacy.
So what do you think of the new Bella?
I want to punch you in the face so bad right now.
Summary: Whatever happened to true love? To fairytale romance? Where was that magical spark, those lingering kisses, the butterflies in your stomach, the fireworks in your heart? Where was the romance and the honesty in a forced love, in a forced marriage between you and Jungkook?
Word Count: 3,243
A/N: I’m very excited to get this series going tbh and I’m also very excited to see a lot of you actually like this!! Thank you for taking the time to read my stuff
It’s Ramadan, and I see that clip titled appropriately from first glance, and I’m expecting some hilarious and relatable comments about how hungry everyone is and how they can’t wait to break their fast.
Instead, I’m greeted with boys who we usually never hear from chatting about their rewards of 72 virgins and talking about ‘00 girls. Because, hey, that’s what Muslim guys are like, right? That’s what people do in Ramadan, right? We swear and talk sexually about woman like their sexual objects, that’s what it means to be a Muslim, especially during Ramadan, isn’t it?
I was so excited for this season. It is so satisfying, so incredibly emotional to see yourself represented as even a minor character in any type of work. But to have an entire season dedicated to your center of representation?
That’s a literal dream.
So now when I’m being shown this crappy excuse for “representation”, I honestly have no words.
Muslim girls are constantly living in contrast and comparison. There’s this constant comparison between us and western beauty standards with skinny white girls. To have this addressed is important, obviously, but then to have no “voice of reason” in the show to say otherwise and instead go to seemingly prove to us that skinny white girls are favored even by MoC is like a punch in the face.
A beautiful alternative could have been Yousef as Sana’s love interest. Instead Yousef went for the skinny white girl when it came to Sana vs. Noora in the end as well. The very fact that there are people who are defending him is absolutely disgusting. He gave Sana hints, he pursued her clearly and he knew that she knew exactly what he was doing. In the end, without even trying to go for confirmation or to talk about this thing that was going on between them, he went to kiss Noora instead at a party he knew Sana was attending.
It’s near the end of the season, near the end of the series, and yet we’ve got nothing to give Sana closure even coming into consideration yet. We see her suffer, see her insulted and bullied and hurt and compared, over and over and over again to that same skinny white girl, and by the end of one of the last goddamn episodes, we see a hint of villanization for her character.
Though I like Noora, I’ve found a certain bitterness towards her character due to the fact that she’s been basically in the spotlight for every single season. She’s supposed to represent a feminist, a wise and intellectual woman, but instead she’s being used as an object of beauty and a comparison reference point to a muslim woman of color.
It would be much appreciated that this season be risen from the ditch it’s fallen into through Sana accepting her religion and finding peace in that, though even then the glaring reminders will be prominent in every day life from what Julie has written thus far.
The halls were full. The crowds were alive and the excitement was absolutely addicting, coursing through the convention center like its own entity, sweeping through hallways and meeting rooms, infecting everyone it came in contact with, and the stars themselves were not immune.