but good job hawks

Essays in Existentialism: Stud V

omg stud lexa is great. i’m in love. she said it. ah ah ah. hope there’s gonna be a part v!

Previously on Stud

The long and winding driveway that led to the Woods’ estate crept along the creek that slithered its way along the property, connecting inland with the ocean in the distance. The trees fought the good fight against the impending autumn, still lingering in verdant greens while their tops and farthest leaves began to catch fire, flickering with the flames of reds and yellows and deep, deep auburn. In the distance, atop the small hill, the peaks of the roof could be seen every so often, nearly glowing with their lights in the dusk.

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Hunger Games Simulator

District 1 is Homestuck, 2 is Death Note, 3 is Tokyo Ghoul, 4 is 7 Deadly Sins, 5 is Fairy Tail, 6 is Shadowhunters.

District 7 is Divergent, 8 is Attack on Titan, 9 is Adventure Time, 10 is Undertale, 11 is Doctor Who, and 12 is Harry Potter.

How dare you, Tom

Bloodbath over, Day 1

Voldemort knows archery?

Good job Flowey and Marshall.

Night 1,

Aww, don’t worry Hawk and Ban.

Nooo, Rose

Tom riddle, cheerfully singing?

day 2,

Really, Lucy?

I honestly expected better from L and Mikasa

night 2

Ryuk x Flowey, my new OTP

Alec Lightwood! How could you!

day 3

Serves you right, Alec

night 3

I ship John Egbert x Magnus Bane

day 4

night 4

:,(

Damn you, Tsukiyama

day 5

ooh, more John x Magnus

arena event

Carnivorous squirrels? 

Too many good men were lost that day

night 5

Well done, Kaneki

the feast

whyyy, why would you kill Kaneki and Four

day 6

Its getting close

night 6

:,( John, no

night 7

We have a winner!!!

And here’s all the placements

4

Have you told your handsome spirit husband that you love him today? Because if not you totally should 8′)

Starting off Justice Positive week with something simple and silly because I need to loosen up a bit first before I get to the bigger ideas I have. Also, Justice has totally been practicing his smiling and he’s doing a really good job, I’m proud of him.

Day Four (Thursday, June 9): “I picked it up listening to them.”
Fenris is fluent in at least three languages, and with the help of Hawke learns to read and write. Does he know more languages? Does he teach anyone else? Do any of the other companions help Hawke with his reading/writing lessons? Get creative!

Below, I have two short little drabble exercises. I might go back and edit them to be longer one-shots, but I wanted to get these posted for today’s prompt!


Lessons with Hawke

“‘Without another word, the…ch…che…’”

Taking note of Fenris’ stumbling, Sylvia returned her quill to the inkwell atop her desk. She pushed back in her chair and went to join the elf on the loveseat tucked in the corner of the room. She peered over his shoulder, taking a moment to locate the sentence he was reading.

“‘Chevalier,’” she told him.

He glanced up at her, the furrow in his brow evident of his disbelief. He glanced back at the word, silent for a few moments as he tried to commit the word to memory. “…It’s an Orlesian word, isn’t it?” he finally asked.

She nodded and explained, “The chevaliers are an special order of knights in Orlais.”

“Ah,” was his only reply, before he focused again on his reading. “‘Without another word, the chevalier turned on his heel and left the great hall, leaving a stunned silence in his wake.’” Fenris paused, and let out a soft sigh, closing the book and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“What’s wrong?” Sylvia asked quietly.

“Hmm?”

She quirked a brow slightly at his non-answer. “You seem tired.”

He shook his head. “No, I’m fine. It’s just…That took me longer than I would like to admit. I’m sure I took up your time.”

A soft smile crossed her face, and she shook her head a little. “No, it’s no problem. I’m glad to help. I’m actually incredibly proud of you, Fenris. You’ve progressed greatly.”

At his doubtful expression, she slowly reached out to grasp one of his hands. He tensed instinctively, and the lyrium markings on his skin pulsed blue for a moment. But then he relaxed, and slowly twined his fingers with hers.

Assured, Sylvia pressed on. “You really are making great progress, Fenris. It’s wonderful that you’re able to read chapter books now. And even if you did take some time to get through today’s reading, you hardly needed my assistance.” She smiled again, giving his hand a very slight squeeze. “You’re doing a very good job.”

“…Thank you, Hawke. That is…reassuring.”


Teaching Hawke

Festis bei umo canavarum, Hawke! Why do always insist on charging ahead without me?”

Normally, Sylvia would feel ashamed when her now-husband criticized her reckless behavior. But this time she felt a sort of amusement take precedence over her shame.

“You say that a lot. What does it mean?”

Fenris blinked, obviously startled by the question. “What?”

“Whenever I go off and do something idiotic. You always say that sentence. ‘Festis bei umo canavarum,’” she repeated to clarify further, her mouth stumbling around the Tevene words.

Another blink, a long pause. Then Fenris made something a choking sound, a snort of laughter. He tilted his head downwards to try to hide his smile, but he still could not stop his shoulders from shaking. Sylvia found herself smiling, marveling at the sound of his laughter.

Once the elf managed to regain his composure, he glanced at her with a faint smirk. “Your pronunciation was terrible.”

“I’d guessed. But that still doesn’t answer my question.”

His face softened, and he reached out to lay a hand against her cheek. “It means, ‘You will be the death of me.’”

She felt a flicker of annoyance at the explanation, but then she thought a bit on the revelation. Well, Fenris did have very valid reasons to say that, especially when it seemed as if danger loved to gravitate around her. Besides, knowing his tendencies towards brooding behavior, the utterance of frustration was most likely his way of expressing his concern for her well-being post-battle.

“Then I apologize for always worrying you so,” she told him.

He chuckled lightly, and dropped his hand from her cheek, moving down to twine his gauntleted fingers with hers. Together, they started off down the path again.

After a few moments, Sylvia spoke up again. “Will you teach me Tevene? And Qunlat?”

“If you wish. But I think it would only be fair, since you’ve already shown me how to read and write.” He glanced at her, another faint smile toying on his lips. “We will certainly need to work on your pronunciation, amatus.”

“And what does that mean?”

Fenris leaned down and brushed a kiss against her temple. “It’s a term of endearment. It could be translated as ‘my love.’”

Sylvia’s cheeks flamed, the color nearly matching the streak of paint across the bridge of her nose.

A Story of Working and Gluten and Illness and Importance

So, I’ve had a full time job for about 7 weeks now, give a bit. 

A week and a half into training I was supposed to start my period. I didn’t. I thought it was just stress. 
Jump ahead a bit and I have the worst panic attack I’ve ever had. I am exhausted again, all the time, I am constantly feeling on the verge of panic, and I skip another period. (Let’s be clear, I am not sexually active, pregnancy is not a possibility.) 

I’m still thinking I’m just stressed. 

Rewind a little bit. When I started my job I weighed 103 pounds. 
This is really REALLY important information. Backstory: I have been about 98 pounds for the last several years of my life. I’m 5′2″. So 98 pounds is not the worst thing ever, but it’s not ideal. I should be about 105-110. 
I have celiac disease. An autoimmune disease where I can’t have gluten, or anti-bodies are created that damage the villi  in my intestines. Villi are how we absorb nutrition in the intestines. 

Anyway, my getting to 103 pounds was a REALLY BIG DEAL. I was doing SO well. I was feeling better, I had more energy, I was sleeping better, I was feeling. So. Damn. Good. 

Now, just a few weeks later, everything is going downhill.

I finally weighed myself. 
88 pounds. 

I realized it couldn’t just be stress. I had lost 15 pounds in such a short time and I was dizzy, panicked, stressed, weak, my stomach hurt when I ate, my stomach hurt when I didn’t eat. I was nauseous and I could barely get food down without wanting to vomit. 

I had to fight to get some time off to recover. I had to hint at a law suit. I would have pulled out a flat out law suit if my doctors note and the hint hadn’t worked. My company doesn’t take doctors notes. 

I discovered I’d been touching the surfaces in the break room at work, where gluten molecules were, and I was touching my own lunch and eating it. 
Molecules. Microscopic bits of gluten did this to me. 

It’s been 6 days since I went to the doctor. I’ve been living off of ensure and eating when I can. I can eat now without pain which is so good. 
I’ve gained about 3 pounds back. Last time I weighed myself I was 91.8 pounds. 


The reason I tell you all this, is because this is massively important to me. 
Gluten Free diets are seen as a fad and a trend and for some people they are. 
There are several problems with this. 
The lesser is that going gluten free when you don’t need to be gluten free is very bad for you. You can develop an allergy to gluten and gluten free diets won’t help you lose weight. Don’t do it if you don’t need to. 

Second, and more importantly, the view on gluten free diets being a fad is life threatening to people like me. 
Because people don’t take this seriously. If you told someone at a restaurant that you had a peanut allergy you can bet your ass they’d listen and be SO careful because they know peanuts could kill someone. 

But my disease is less visible. I don’t go into anaphylactic shock. I don’t need an EPI pen. Instead I start dying slowly without even realizing it myself. 
I was on the verge of wasting away and trying to tell myself that it was just stress. 

If I had lost 5-10 more pounds I could have ended up in the hospital on a feeding tube. 

And people don’t take me seriously.

I can eat out very few places. I’m going to use Costa Vida as an example here because I eat there more than anywhere else. 

Costa Vida advertises gluten free. Most of their food is gluten free. And for the most part they do a really good job. BUT I STILL HAVE TO WATCH THEM LIKE A HAWK. 
Because if any of my food so much as touches any surface that’s had gluten on it, it will make me sick. 
One of the workers used tongs to get my nachos off the oven and touched my chips with the tongs. I made them start over. 
One of the workers dropped one of my chips onto the tray with the flour tortillas. I made him start over. One of the workers used the spatula that was used for the flour tortilla tacos on my corn tacos. I made them start over. 


And the reaction I get every time is usually irritation. I don’t let this get to me. I make them do it and I tell them what for if I have to. Because I’m not going to let my disease stop me from eating out and enjoying food I love. 

One guy told me I was hard to please when I made him start over. I told him I didn’t want to die. He looked slightly alarmed and said fair enough. But he was still annoyed. 

Point: If you have celiac friends or celiac coworkers or celiac family, listen to them. Help them watch for mistakes when you go out to eat with them. Don’t be annoyed with them when they can’t eat where you want to eat. 
Help them stand up for themselves when the people preparing their food are assholes. 

I got very sick people. I’m very very sick right now. I’m getting better, but I am very very sick. This is so important. Be aware. Stop making fun of gluten free people (unless they’re not celiac or not allergic and they’re doing fad diets. Then please tell them they’re doing themselves a disservice by not eating gluten.) 

I have to go back to work on Saturday. I cannot eat in the break room at work. It’s not safe. Period. I will have to go eat in my car. 
And no one there gives a shit. 

I’m going to look for a different job. I’ve been massively unimpressed by the way I’ve been treated. And I’m not super thrilled about the job or the location anyways. I want to be able to work. I want to be there and do my job. But I also don’t want to be treated like a criminal when I get sick. (Like, seriously. You don’t take doctors notes for emergencies? What is this?) 
This disease is not going to stop me as long as I can eat safely. I am capable of holding a full time job and being at work and doing my work. But I’d like to do that in a place that’s going to help me stay healthy and respect me enough to work with me and not treat me like a lying child. 

So wish me luck! Be kind to your gluten free friends, stick up for them, and send me some good get healthy and find a better job vibes. 



can we all just like take a moment tho like tarasenko is so humble and so sweet he took the time to individually hug each hawk and tell them good job like damn how could u hate that boy

So tatteredpantaloons and I somehow got to the point where we were recreating Handers scenes through emoji (don’t…don’t ask…), and I thought I’d show off the fruits of our labor! Can you guess which scene is which? :3

(first encounter! by tattered. this is the New and Improved™ version. still laughing at the emoji interpretation of Grey Warden)

(first romance scene at the Hawke estate! by me)

(and the romance scene’s continuation! by tattered. fuck yeah they’re gonna get married)

(chantry boom! by me. Hawke isn’t mad, he just wanted in on that tbh. and the fugitive boyfriends lived happily ever after ❤️)

~fin~ …for now?!