but clearly i didn't do any of it

Besides my unbridled obsession with Hallmark holidays, a bit of encouragement from @corinnestark convinced me to upload this Olitz themed Valentine’s Day card. Hope you like it.

Escape from Castle Lalonde

Three excerpts from a fic I’ll never write more than this in the GG/HS crossover ‘verse I’ll probably never even have a coherent plot for. 


Jane was handcuffed to a slab. Ankle-cuffed too, actually, and they were all quite high quality shackles so she hadn’t figured out how to break out of them yet. Scanning the lab around her, she could see seventeen different methods ways to break, dissolve, or discretely explode them, but that would require being able to get off the table and reach the necessary tools and ingredients. A true paradox.

At least she knew who had been menacing the villagers around the once-abandoned Castle Lalonde. Case closed, A+ investigatorial skills, time to collect her fee and get out of town.

Well, get out of town at any rate. The investigation had been pro bono and technically unasked for. Thus the charitable life of a rogue heiress turned hero!

She was still working on just getting off the slab when a head poked into the lab, followed shortly by a body. An attractive young man, about Jane’s age, with messy black hair and green eyes. She hadn’t actually met the Sparks of the castle—she’d been busted sneaking in a secret tunnel by a pair of clanks, one of whom kept trying to recite poetry for some reason—but from the hunch in his wide shoulders and the slight skittering of his gaze, she pegged this young man as a minion.

“Hello!” she called, because being chained to a table was no reason not to be polite. “I don’t suppose you’re here to set me free?”

It was a long shot on an overused trope, so Jane was at least as startled as the minion when he blinked dumbly and said, “Oh, um, indeed I am!”

Keep reading