but I might do some more things over the next couple days

French students harass and bully me for asking them to speak English in an English-taught class, so I get them expelled.

This happened a few years back in China, at one of the universities there. Here, I was studying Chinese language and I shared my language class with some people from France and Belgium (the French speaking part). Our Chinese teacher was a really nice little lady that happened to also speak French. So often, whenever the French speakers had a question, they would ask it in French. Now, I didn’t really mind it all that much but at some point, it got to the point where about half of the questions in the class were asked in a language I did not understand. Obviously that is detrimental to my own learning experience since understanding the questions is important for me to learn the language. So I politely asked them if we could just do the class in English because about half of us didn’t understand what was being asked.

Laoshi (the teacher) was very nice about it and afterwards, asked the students if they could rephrase their question in English when they asked it in French. But apparently the French and Belgian girls and guys didn’t take it so well. They were constantly glaring at me, and whispering among themselves in French. Well, I just shrugged and moved on.

However, outside of class they were always sticking together in their own little group, doing things together. At first they would just walk past me when I was sitting down having a beer with my friends, and they would simply glare. But at some point it came down to them cursing, talking shit about me to other students and spitting on my lap when I was sitting in the park. Obviously I was seething so I might have called them a few words which were a bit too unsavoury. Anyhow, they didn’t take it well.

So the next day, I found out that they scribbled all sorts of things on my dorm room. It said ‘肏你妈’ (basically: fuck your mother) and 'nazi’ (I don’t actually know why they put this one. I think they thought I was German, which I’m not). Obviously I was pissed, but I didn’t really know what to do so I reported it to the International Student Office. ISO was really nice and understanding, but told me they can’t actually do much unless I provide proof that something is happening.

Thus, I went on Taobao and and bought a little recording camera (looked a bit like a dashcam, it had the time and date and everything). After the university had painted my room door over (they couldn’t get the markers off apparently) I hung the camera up in a corner of our dorm corridor and pointed it at my door. Then I left and made sure to loop around a little bit to walk past the group of French/Belgians so that they knew I was leaving campus towards the metro station.

I had some nice dumpling soup and a beer and when I came back, look and behold! Once again they were hardly creative with their insults (just more of the same) but this time I had proof! I checked the video and I was very pleased: 5 out of 7 of the group were actually there, and all wrote down something on the door with permanent marker. One of the guys even kicked the door which caused a crack at the bottom (these doors were not very sturdy). They seemed to have a lot of fun doing it.

Now, of course the school was properly pissed when I showed them the video. Normally the students would just get a stern warning but because ISO was aware that they were doing it before, and also about the fact that they were harassing me all the time (I reported everything to them when it happened) they were less than understanding this time and suggested the board that had to decide on this (no idea what their name was, I couldn’t recognize their name in Hanzi) to expell the students.

And so they were. All of this took place over the course of a couple of months, so we were nearing the end of the semester. The five students who scribbled at my door got expelled just before their exams, which meant that all the time they spent at the university was effectively worthless since they did not receive any credits for it. But it gets even better. After this whole ordeal, I sent a neat (anonymous) letter in Chinese (one of my Chinese friends helped me write it) to the Public Security Bureau that these students had engaged in vandalism at our university. A few weeks later, after I had already returned home, I was told by a friend of mine who was on good terms with their group that some of them had booked tickets and hostels to travel in China at the end of the semester. However, their visa extension was denied by the Public Security Bureau on the basis of their misdemeanour at the university.

I’m not sure if the second part was caused because of my letter, or simply because the university informed the police, but I like to pretend that it was the former. So I was just laughing my ass off as they slaved away half a year in courses for which they would receive no credit, and had to cancel thousands worth of travel plans. That truly was a sweet, sweet feeling.

obbsessedturtle  asked:

Chlonette and mermaids

this isn’t really very plotty but idk modern mermaid au i guess :P

words: 1961


Marinette looked into her old jewelry box and realized she was quickly running out of stock. 

About the only things left inside that she was willing to part with were a stack of silver rings (fake silver probably, but that was Marinette’s secret) and a strange bronze bee broach that her aunt had gotten her for her birthday three years ago that Marinette never bothered to wear. She dug around her closet for her old hand mirror with the cracked handle and decided that all this was enough. It was probably time to start scouring thrift stores and street fairs, but she’d worry about that later. 

She stuffed everything into her bag, grabbed a croissant from the kitchen counter, and started to make her way towards the pier. 

It was early enough in the morning that not many people were by the beach with the exception of the occasional fisherman heading to the southern part of the pier with fishing rods and baskets full of bait. Marinette headed in the opposite direction until she came upon a part of the rickety, wooden banister that was damaged, leaving a hole just large enough for Marinette to slip past. She looked around her to make sure no one was watching before she squeezed through the gap and carefully started to shimmy down one of the posts until she was dropping down onto a small bank of rocks underneath the walkway. 

Marinette squinted against the sunrise coming just over the horizon as she whistled a quick tune with four long notes and waited. 

It only took a few seconds for a glimmering golden fin to breach the surface of the water just a few meters away. Marinette watched the ripples in the water begin to get closer to her until they finally started to swirl around her feet. A blonde head of hair carefully poked up from underneath the water. “Is the coast clear?”

“No one’s around, don’t worry,” Marinette assured. “You can come up.”

“Oh, wonderful.” 

Chloe leaned her hands against the bank of rocks and carefully lifted herself up to sit right next to Marinette, stretching her long golden tail out in front of her so that her scales could dry in the sun. She collected all of her hair in her hands and wrung out all the water, being careful not to disturb the chains of pearls she had braided throughout her hair. “You don’t usually come on Tuesdays. Don’t you open up the bakery in the mornings?” 

“It’s a holiday today, so school’s out and the bakery is closed,” Marinette explained. “Thought I’d come visit.” 

“You’re lucky,” Chloe smirked. “I was just out this morning looking for jellyfish.”

Marinette dug through her bag. “Jellyfish?”

“Of course, darling. Do you think my tail stays this smooth and shiny through will power? Proper tail maintenance is important. It’s downright tragic how other mermaids tend to neglect that.” 

Keep reading

How i study languages

A couple of days ago @bonbonlanguage asked if i have a post about what i do in order to learn a new language so i thought i should try to make a post about that.

The beginning

As a beginner i always do the same stuff. I research a couple of apps or i just see if my favourite choices have a version for my target language. Usually i use: 

Memrise
Fun Easy Learn
9000 words
50Languages
HiNative
babbel, busuu (rarely but i still have them on my phone)

+some sites and specific apps only for my target language

I choose a grammar book and i take notes from from it. So far i chose books from 3 collections: Teach Yourself, Colloquial and For Dummies.

How i take notes from a book

I ignore the excercises, in my notebook you will see only grammar notes and sometimes irregular verbs at the end, but you will never see exercises. (i’ll say later what i do with the exercises)
If the book has a pretty good structure, i just copy what’s in there. (when i say good structure i mean that i can’t extract main ideas or just a formula              e.g. stem+ending)
The theory is written in black or blue, the examples are written with a pencil and if there is a keyword, i highlight it. When i have languages with articles based on the gender of the words, like French, i use a pink and a light blue pen so when i study the articles i can see the difference. 
Now, i said that in my notebook you won’t see exercises, true, that’s because i solve them on another notebook or just on a blank sheet of paper. If your book has exercises after the grammar lesson, solve them. If half of them are wrong, you will take a break of 1-2 days (in which you will study the grammar rules) and when you feel prepared, you solve again those exercises. (you are allowed to have mistakes but try to have at least 70% of the exercises correct).
What i do after i finish a book
After i finish that grammar book, i take another one. However, this time i don’t copy-paste like i did the first time. I read what informations are there and if there are new rules/exceptions, i just write them on a sticky note and add it to my notebook. After i finish my 2nd book i usually move on to the next stage but if i feel that i missed out something, i take a 3rd book and do what i did with the 2nd one.
As a beginner i have the habit to read my notes once a week, as an intermediate learner i rarely do that.

Don’t understand that as a beginner you only take notes! Sometimes when i get bored i just study on memrise/vocabulary app and that sometimes can last 1 week, sometimes 2. I even like to use InternetPolyglot with my target language and an old target language. (e.g. I learn new words in Spanish through Danish) 

After i have a proper notebook

Usually when i finish my book and i add all the exceptions/rules that i found in the 2nd book i also have learned 1.500-2.000 words in that period of time so i want to test my skills.

When i feel confident enough, i start using duolingo. I use it as a test tool, not as a learning one! I take the shortcuts and usually in 2 days i finish a tree. (at the last part of the tree you don’t have a shortcut for everything so you just have to take the shortcut of every skill there which gets boring)

Since Duolingo is pretty advanced with his lessons, at the end i can consider myself a B1 learner. (if you have an amazing memory and skills, you can say you are B2, but Duolingo can’t get you further than that)

The intermediate stage

Whoever followed my blog for a while knows that i have 2 nightmares in my language learning journey, the intermediate stage and the irregular verbs.

For how to overcome a plateau in the intermediate stage i made a post here. (sooner or later you will hit a plateau)

Back to what i do. No book anymore, duolingo is done, this is the moment when i start to use my skills. If i didn’t use 50Languages as a beginner, i use it now. It has 100 audios so i use them to get used to the sound of the words in case i don’t know them and i also use it as a resources to learn new words. On Memrise i try to find advanced/intermediate and i use 9000 words and Fun Easy Learn. 

At this level the main problem is the lack of vocabulary so i try to learn as many new words as i can. However, since using apps can get boring after a while, i use the classic method of learning vocabulary, reading.

How i memorize/learn new words

Most of the time i just use apps/sites. However, everyone had moments when we couldn’t remember a word regardless of how many times we tried to memorize it. When i have to deal with this, i usually make a mnemonic. (e.g. afslutte = to finish, to end, to conclude; in order to remember the meaning i think at a key sentence: If you don’t study you’ll END up as a slut. [harsh example, i know, but it stays in my mind])

If my mnemonic method doesn’t work, i write the word a couple of times, sometimes with my left hand too since i focus more then. (i’m right-handed) and if i still can’t remember the meaning, i’ll start making some sentences where i’ll use that word.

How i read in my target language

Just as a side note, if i feel confident with my skills (that has happened only once) i read books, if not, i read comics until i feel confident enough to try books.

I have 2 methods because sometimes the first one doesn’t work. So, for French i just read and try to guess the meaning of a word and if i can’t, then i search it. Why i do this for French? It’s easier somehow and i can guess the meaning very well. Sometimes i even highlight words and search the meaning later just to analyze them more.

However, this method doesn’t work on Danish. For Danish i have to read once the entire paragraph and then see what i understood from it. If there is a certain word that it’s unknown, i’ll search it. Since Danish has a lot of structures, i tend to use HiNative to translate those because normal online translators aren’t good for these. After i have all the unknown words, i will look over the paragraph again.

With all these unknown words, i usually make flashcards on Quizlet and practice them from time to time.

Sometimes when i’m in a hurry or i’m not in the mood for studying new words in big quantities, i use WordBrewery or Clozemaster. When i use these i always write the new words on a piece of paper or i just add them directly to Quizlet.

HiNative

I mentioned it above so i should tell you how i use it in order to improve since many might not be familiar to it. It’s an app where you ask questions and natives will answer.  I use HiNative mostly after i read, watch a movie or learn something from memrise.

For what i use it?

- ask for differences
- ask for examples with new words that i didn’t find a context for
- ask for translation from target language to English since not everything is easy to translate as a beginner/intermediate

Listening skills

Listening is a very interesting skill because you can combine it with speaking and reading or just focus only on it.

Listening+reading

In this category you find movies/cartoon/series with subs. Usually i don’t do anything when i watch series/movies because i guess the meaning of the unknown words but if there is a certain word that i can’t understand, i will write it down and search it’s meaning.

Listening+speaking

This involves 2 things. I either talk to someone or i just talk to myself/a toy/the cat. I tend to use the 2nd method most of the time. (it’s not that i dislike talking, i just don’t feel confident enough to use my skills until i’m not sure that i know most of the things/vocab i need to know). I start the conversation like “hey, how are you?” and then i ask myself “how was your day?”. For this question i have to make 2 answers, the reality with what has happened, and an imaginary version for my other side who’s “talking”.

Listening

Here i just watch videos on youtube, listen to 50languages, a podcast or songs. If i do listen to songs, sometimes i try to find the lyrics and see if i understand everything, if not, i’ll look for the unknown words and after i start to sing too. (disney songs are great because most have lyrics on youtube already)

Writing skills

Here i have 2 choices, i either find someone or i just write in a notebook/diary. The purpose of this is to figure out what vocab/structures/expressions i don’t know. 

Speaking skills

It’s not that i dislike talking, i just focus on this skill at the end usually. I improve my other skills and the speaking one improves in a weird way too. However, at some point i just ask people who i know for a long time and i feel comfortable with to talk to me on skype/on the phone.

Extra

Idioms are everywhere in a language. At some point you have to deal with them. If i find them on memrise, i study them there, if not, i’ll look for them and make flashcards. These flashcards have only the idiom in my target language on them and that’s it. I don’t write the translation. I force myself to remember the meaning.

Also, when i don’t know the pronunciation for something, i use Forvo.

The advanced stage

Here i just learn idioms and some advanced vocabulary at the beginning. After these, i stop caring. I consider my learning journey almost done so i just enjoy my life using the language. I read without worrying that i don’t know words, i watch shows without worrying that i don’t understand what i hear, i can sing without worrying that i just say words with no meaning but similar sounds to what i hear.

Note: This is how I learn languages. I can’t say it will work for everyone but it works for me.

p.s. sometimes Fun Easy Learn and 50Languages are set in another language, not my native one or English.

A brazen challenge

Synopsis: Imagine admitting to Loki that you never manage to orgasm when are with men, making him smirk mischievously in response.

“Is that a challenge, my dear?”

So for the next couple of hours, he magically locks the two of you in your room and makes it a challenge as to how many times he can make you cum in a row. He pleasures you with his soft hands, his skilled and long fingers and his silver tongue before he fucks you roughly.

Pairing: Loki x Reader
Rating: M
Chapter: 1/1 (Oneshot)
Words: 4040
Warnings: smut. a lot of smut.

Keep reading

Imagine being in a relationship with Jensen for years and getting married in secret and him revealing it in an interview.

“Well, I really feel like I need to give you great congratulations for the movie once more. Nobody expected it to be such a blockbuster but we were pleasantly surprised, I’m sure it must have been for you too seeing as- it’s the first time you act on a movie together, am I right?” the interviewer asked and you nodded your head, glancing at your costar and… husband.

“Yeah, well I- I’ve been out of the big screen for some time now because I- because of Supernatural, and I love don’t get me wrong. It was my choice because I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world, even if sometimes the shooting is exhausting it’s all worth it.” Jensen gave her a charming grin.

“I’ll agree, they’ve got like the best crew I’ve ever met. Everything works out so well and- and that’s even more surprising seeing how much they goof around I- at times I wonder how they get anything done there!” you laughed and Jensen chuckled, nodding his head with a shy smile.

“We’re all a bunch of kids, I’ll admit.” he mumbled as you rubbed his shoulder.

“But they really have the best of the best there. From director, writers, crew to cast, I think that’s what has made the show so successful so I don’t blame Jensen or anyone if they’d never want to leave that! They are really a family and- and you can feel that you know?” you made hand motions “You feel it from the first day and you feel so welcomed you just could as well stay there forever!”

“Speaking of which, though-” the interviewer spoke up with a smile “-Congratulations (Y/n)! I learned that you have been cast to play a surprise character in the show this upcoming season, is it right?”

“Uh yeah, yeah I have! It was amazing, the soonest I found out they wanted someone for a role I just went for it. I didn’t care what it was as long as I could be there even for one effin episode, it will be more than that yeah but still.” you nodded your head.

“Yeah, and I secretly believe that she was just cast to be there to take care of us. I mean “Two oscars?”-” he made a deep voice and a funny face “Screw that, she can keep Jensen and Jared under control; you’re hired!” he slammed his hand on the chair and you giggled as he laughed along with the interviewer.

“I can almost believe that to be honest.” she laughed “But to be honest, and just because we saw how people reacted to the news: Do you not think it has to do with the chemistry you two seemed to have in the movie? And-” she raised a finger “-Before you answer, let me tell you that 9 out of 10 critics pointed out how great your acting together was, as it’s obviously well known. The fans have not stopped shipping you like crazy after this movie, asking for as much as they can get of the two of you together in a screen, big or small.”

Jensen had a sly smirk on his face and you kicked his foot slightly, trying to keep a serious face on “Well-” he cleared his throat, getting a little serious himself, or at least trying to “-I mean look at her!” he showed you off with both his hands “How can someone not have chemistry with this woman?”

You giggled shaking your head with a blush “J!”

“We- we just clicked, from the first moment; I think that was it.” he said with a fond smile and you knew that even if she thought the first day of shooting you could understand he met that first time about ten years ago in a coffee shop “There was a connection, there was defintiely understanding, an unspoken agreement and-”

“Lots of spilled coffee.” you added with a giggle and he laughed next to you.

“Lots of spilled coffee too, yeah.” he had a boyish grin on his face.

“There was chemistry, yeah.” you spoke more softly “Maybe we didn’t see it from the first moment, but it was there. We don’t act like any other couple- screen couple I mean.” you hurried to add “You’d really be surprised to see us communicate, maybe freak out a little bit too.” you chuckled and Jensen did the same “But we- we work, that’s what we know and we’re glad that people could see it as well and that it helped the movie so much; in being believable and true I mean.”

“It really came out of nowhere for some, me including let me tell you. I might be fangirling a little now, but your ship is a really big thing and I know this Halloween what I am going to dress up with my boyfriend. With both the new season of Supernatural and a Sequel in the works the ship has sailed!” she said with a wide grin and you and Jensen laughed.

“You tell me!” he grinned “Wherever I go someone will talk about it and you know what? I completely understand!” he nodded his head.

“Of course you would.” you said with a small smirk and he gave you a look that just made you shift in your place uncomfortably.

“And you know-” he suddenly said, turning to look at the interviewer “I ship it too. Yeah, I ship us like you have no idea but I think I’m the number one fan here because this has been my ship for much longer than yours!”

“Really? That would be an interesting story to hear!”

“Oh you bet!” you exclaimed, remembering how much he tried everything in his power to get to you to say yes in a date with him.

“You know?” she raised an eyebrow and you nodded your head with a grin.

“I was drunk, that’s the only thing I have to say! I was drunk, for everything! Just getting it out there, before he says anything.”

“Excuse me?!” he gasped, looking at you in fake shock that made you and the other woman laugh “Ouch!” he placed a hand over his chest.

“You know what?” he looked at the interviewer “You think a woman loves you, you do everything together: Jump off cliffs, kill aliens, go through the end of the world and almost give your life for each other and that’s what she says: I was drunk. Pff” he scoffed, shaking his head “You end up getting married and after almost a year she tells me she was just drunk, can you believe that?” he asked, his voice almost squeaky as the woman stared with almost wide eyes between the two of you, her smile vanishing slowly as she got more shocked.

“Wh-what?”

“No, really. I even buy her flowers every chance I get- not just anniversaries but well, she was obviously drunk when she said yes.” he said with a clearly fake hurt face and you giggled as the interviewer gaped at you.

“You two are-” she ended up grinning as you nodded your head with a shy smile

“Ask the wife.” he said with a small pout as he rested his chin on his hand, his wedding ring more evident at that moment.

“Thanks, Maggie. Love you,” Dex says, and Nursey’s heart stops beating for a moment. His lungs refuse to inhale or exhale. The muscles in his legs forget that they are holding up an actual person.

Then Dex’s eyes catch his, going wide at the interruption, and Nursey somehow finds it in himself to pretend that everything is exactly the same now as it was thirty seconds ago.

He looks away and heads for the fridge, his limbs remembering themselves once more.

“Hey, uh, sorry, I gotta go. Can I call you back?” Dex says into his cell phone on the other side of the Haus kitchen.

Nursey rummages through several pounds of butter in search of something edible. He silently repeats to himself his old mantra from Andover, from when he could barely see straight for the tears welling up in his eyes at every backhanded remark or micro-aggression. The mantra he used to train his emotions not to show themselves at every turn, the way they had done with abandon throughout his childhood.

“Write it down instead,” his sister suggested, when he confided to her his inability to keep things bottled up. And, after a time, that strategy seemed to work.

Write it down instead, he still tells himself now, at the end of his Sophomore year at Samwell, whenever the world becomes too much, whenever he feels suddenly as though his façade of always okay always fine always chill isn’t strong enough to handle the current situation.

Nursey begins to silently run through the words again in his head now, trying very hard not to analyze why he needs to.

“Um, so. How much of that did you hear?” Dex asks him, and luckily Nursey’s got his head buried so far into the freezer that he doesn’t have to cover his pained grimace.

“Not much, man, don’t worry about it. Hey, you think Bitty would murder us if we used his new oven for store-brand taquitos?”

He barely hears Dex’s reply, though, too busy faking normalcy. Too busy wondering who it was on the other end of Dex’s phone call that got to hear the words “I love you” from the guy, and so casually offered up that Dex must say it to her daily.

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The Time of Our Lives (Steven Moffat’s final DWM Column)

You know something I don’t know. You know who the next Doctor is. At least, I think that will be out by the time you read this. Old Chibs (as he must always now be known) is playing his cards close to his chest, and won’t tell me a thing. I attempted to give him some sage advice on the subject of secrecy, but he gave me a look, as if to say, “Seriously, have you checked your own record on this??” and had me removed by security. Again. But it’s comfy here, in my skip in the Roath Lock car park, and Russell is good company. When we’re both not crying, that is.

Actually, I’m not comfy at all. I’ve got everything crossed. Can Old Chibs pull it off? Can we actually have a new Doctor that’s a proper surprise, the way it’s supposed to be? I do hope so! But you know all that by now, out there, in the glorious new dawn.

And the fact is, I have no more news for you. Barely any secrets to keep. One more Special on Christmas Day, and I’ll be gone before the end credits. A brand-new team will go blazing into action, and in the far future, vast new Andrew Pixley Archives will form in the void.

But frankly, even I don’t care about me - this is all about Peter Capaldi. I saw him at the end, you know. The very last shot you see of him as the Doctor is in fact (brilliant scheduling by amazing producer, Pete Bennett) the very last thing Peter did on the show. Just as popping out the TARDIS and confusing Strax was the very first thing he did in Deep Breath, all those centuries ago. Since then he’s faced down a Mummy on the Orient Express, talked down a Zygon war using a couple of empty boxes, punched a wall for four and a half billion years, misunderstood the romantic intent of a puddle, decked a racist, insulted Santa, had a 24-year date in a restaurant, and played gooseberry when Missy met herself. He’s been gentle and fierce and rude and kind, and now with a wave of his hand and a flap of his cuff, he’s striding into the sunset to give it a piece of his mind. Be there for him on Christmas Day - Scotland’s finest in his final hour. He’ll break your heart and save your galaxy, all over again.

It was funny, that last day. I was in the studio for most of it, which is the first time I’ve ever managed that on Doctor Who. Normally, there’s so much else to do - new season to plan, new scripts to write, new stars to find. But now, with my time on the show winding down, with desks falling empty, and computers falling silent, and endless rounds of goodbye drinks, there’s nowhere else for me to be.

Brian Minchin is here today. And we sit and laugh and chat, and marvel at Peter’s extraordinary final performance. Every take is different and beautiful in a new way, and how the hell are we supposed to choose just one? It’s not goodbye to Brian, I’m delighted to say - he’s joining me and Sue at Hartswood Films, and we have dark and mighty plans.
Rachel Talalay, our finale specialist, is directing. She’s come back to see number 12 off into the shades but I very much hope she’ll be directing more Doctor Whos in the future. She keeps hinting that she won’t, though.

“You’re already directing the new one - you’re doing the regeneration!”
“Yes, but apart from that.”
“You probably know who the new Doctor is, and everything!”
“No, I don’t”
“You had a secret dinner with Matt Strevens and Old Chibs!”
“It wasn’t secret!”
“Well, I didn’t know about it.”
“No-one thought to tell you, it was just for people who are… you know…”
“What?”
“Involved.”

I was alright after a bit, and the nurse with the oxygen was very nice.

“Who’s the new Doctor?” I demanded to know from my stretcher, mostly in hand signals.
“I don’t know,” lied Rachel, probably.
“Just the initials.”
“I don’t know.”
“Will you tell me if I cry?”
“You’re already crying.”
“… Would you like ten pounds?”

There’s another goodbye coming up - and frankly it’s right here. My old friend, the wise and kind King of Numbers himself, Tom Spilsbury, is leaving this magazine. It’s funny, we’ve done almost everything in parallel in Doctor Who. He was assistant editor on the mag, while I was an occasional writer for Russell’s era. He became editor only shortly before I became showrunner. And now, at the end, we’re tumbling out the door together. We’ve tumbled out of quite a few doors together, but I’m damned if I’m telling you which pubs. Once a month, for so many years, Tom would remind me that this column was due. No, that’s a lie. He’d remind me several times a month. Towards the end, in a very high voice, with crying. Well, no more! These days are over. Tom’s entirely brilliant era of DWM is drawing to a close with every word you read, my time on Doctor Who is vanishing like breath on a mirror, and this column too is about to pop out of existence.

It’s funny how things you take for granted just disappear, isn’t it? That school you went to every day and then never go back to, that friend you part from laughing and never see again, all those doors that click behind you without you knowing they’re closing forever. I first wrote Doctor Who in 2004, and I very much hoped I’d get to write it again. Then I wrote more, and then so much more, until I thought it might go on forever. I remember at some awards dinner, telling Brian I loved my job so much I couldn’t imagine ever stopping. In other more melancholy moments I knew that everything ends and wondered what the very last words I’d ever write about Doctor Who would be. Well, the time has come, and here they are.

All my love, good luck and goodbye.

Our Little Secret-Part Five

Summary: You and Dean figure out how to tell Sam. Later the two of you try something that Dean hasn’t really done

SERIES MASTERLIST

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Square Filled/Kink: Face Fucking for @spnkinkbingo

Word Count: 4300

Warnings: Smut, fingering, oral, rough sex, squirting, language

A/N: I’m sorry. I was going to wait until tomorrow afternoon to post this, but I couldn’t help myself. Thank you so much for reading. I absolutely love writing this series and sharing it with you. Any feedback is always appreciated.



“You want to tell Sam?” He’s got that crease on his forehead, “I thought you didn’t want him to know.”

You smile, stretching your neck, kissing right below his ear, “But you do.”

“You’re okay with it?” He’s confused, “You’re sure?”

“Yeah,” you nod, “I’m sure.”

You’re not sure, not at all, but you kinda need to take the chance.

Dean pulls you up, pressing his lips against yours, kissing you deeply before breaking away.

You giggle, “I guess it will be easier too, we won’t have to come up with excuses for getting a different room.”

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so lots of people have been asking me my thoughts on laci green’s “red pill” stuff recently. some, in an accusatory way (”why aren’t you a good feminist like laci green?”) and some in a confused way (”help im not sure how to process this”).

i’ve largely avoided commenting on it publicly for personal reasons. i dont like talking about individuals instead of ideas anyway, but there was just some stuff going on for me irl that made me not want to comment on this specifically.

but, at this point, i think laci is doing enough harm that it’s worth publicly saying that i really don’t like what she’s doing or how she’s doing it. i could go into a whole like in-depth thing examining every single point in her two “red pill” videos and analyzing her tweets because there’s a lot to unpack, but honestly that’s not worth my time because it won’t convince anyone of anything. people who want to support her are going to support her, and vice versa for those who don’t. i’ve had my arguments about it already and it’s tired and boring.

as an overarching critique, though, all i will say is that she doesn’t need to 1) throw other feminists under the bus or 2) befriend people who engage in online harassment.

you might not think she’s throwing anyone under the bus, and you might not think the people she’s befriending engage in online harassment – but again, i’m not trying to convince anyone of that. that’s just how i see it.

myself and other feminist creators have gotten a lot of backlash for not being ~open to a dialogue~ like laci, and i don’t think she has done anything to defend us. i think she’s tweeted a couple times that “not every feminist has to debate like me” but then the rest of her rhetoric is full of “i hate how so many feminists refuse to engage in dialogue but don’t worry everyone i’m a good feminist”. and not only does that throw us under the bus but it makes the wildly inaccurate assumption that none of us have ever engaged with any competing ideas which is a beloved anti-feminist talking point but patently false. many of us engage with these ideas, just not in the form of livestreamed debates. we’ve had our arguments, we’ve spent hours arguing over the same points, we’ve wasted our time trying to convince people of things they refuse to accept.

it’s just that she seems more interested in pandering to anti-feminists, complimenting them, and making them feel good than she does protecting the people who are at the receiving end of anti-feminist harassment campaigns.

and when people have said extremely horrible horrible things about me and my friends and tried to make our lives hell for months (or years), it hurts to see a large feminist youtuber like laci defending them and leaving me and other feminist youtubers out to dry.

i personally do not think engaging with anti-feminist ideas is a bad thing. contrary to popular belief, i talk to people with opposing viewpoints all the time (but riley you block people on twitter! yeah, conversations happen off twitter, fucking shocking i know right). but at some point, i’m just repeating myself. the arguments have been had. the points have been made. and i don’t have the money, the time, or the energy to devote 8 hours a day to arguing with anti-feminists. if someone else wants to do that, i think there’s a way to go about it that does not involve befriending anti-feminists or elevating small anti-feminists channels to a larger platform. engaging with the ~other side~ is not inherently bad – discussion and dialogue can be useful – but you have to be careful of the way in which you do it. one aspect of that is the difference between discussing privately and debating publicly. public debates are a spectacle, a show. they’re not conducive to learning or growing or conceding points. they’re conducive to proving you’re right and they’re wrong at all costs and being able to say you “owned” them the next day.

i think laci is approaching this in entirely the wrong way, and it seems to me that she has either fallen for a lot of bullshit anti-feminist talking points or is pretending to in an effort to get closer to them. either way, i think it’s kinda messed up.

anyway, that’s all imma say on the topic. the more we all talk about laci and hype up the little drama she has created, the more she profits from it and is incentivized to continue doing it. im done caring about this show she’s putting on, and i’ll continue doing the intersectional work she has abandoned.

The first time I tried to come out to someone I was ten years old and in primary school.
I told a person who was supposed to be one of my best friends. She listened.
The next day when I came to school she had told the twins; my other friends and they all laughed at me and avoided me for days on end. I knew there was something wrong with me then, see!?? So I told them I was just joking and of course I didn’t like girls that way, I’M NOT GAY!
The next time I tried, I told my cousin, my other best friend. She didn’t say a lot about it and just kind of changed the subject. The next time I saw her she asked me if I was being serious with a screwed up look on her face that hit me in the gut like disgust. I felt so sick, am I sick?! There is something so wrong with me. I told her no, of course I wasn’t, I’M NOT GAY, NO REALLY, DEFINITELY!
I started high school desperately trying to be cool, to be normal, to just fit in, why couldn’t I be like all of them? Every now and then someone in the halls would call me a fucking lesbian. It took me right back to those laughs that I heard when I was ten. I was still friends with the same girls who’s laugher haunted me and one night I slept over at their house. They had a brother who was a couple of years older and I thought I might have had a crush on him. It was juvenile wishful thinking. I ended up in his room with the door closed, in the darkness putting his dick in my mouth. After that I asked if I could go home because I was homesick - but I was just sick, I didn’t like anything about him or his dick. I felt so empty and so alone knowing that I was not normal, I was not like any of them. I sat in the bathtub with the door locked at 1am brushing my teeth and trying to erase the stain of what happened.
I came to school on Monday, and people were looking at me. They were talking behind hands and snickering. Someone had told someone and then someone told everyone and they all knew. My mind flew out the second story window in math as a girl passed me a note telling me I was gross and a fucking slut. If anything I thought it would shut them all up? Isn’t that what normal girls do, they like boys and they don’t leave their balls blue?! I had no idea what in the fuck I was supposed to do.
I drifted away from them all, I’d still see them in the halls but we hardly ever talked anymore. I found out that there were certain boys that stayed seperate from the jocks, and their flocks, so I started hanging out with them. They didn’t really care about much of anything and for once I felt a tiny bit of what I thought was belonging. Of course I engaged in ridiculous dating charades where I was one of their girlfriends. We’d occasionally kiss and hold hands and that was it, and I thought it might finally look like I fit. But I still heard it, from time to time “HEY DYKE, ARE YOU A LEMON OR A LIME?” I’d just put my head down and hide. I’d hide behind my boyfriend who was sweet and kind and dopey and gentle, even though most days he kind of drove me mental.
One day there was a new guy at school, I saw him before roll call in the hall and thought he looked cool. Later that day in science, he was sitting opposite me, and I smiled, he smiled back. We’re still friends and it’s about fourteen years down the track - how did we get to that? Well…
The next time I came out it was to him, and he told me he was the same as me. Of course I chose to come out under the label of bisexuality, because I still thought guys were kind of cute and it provided me with a shield of a certain safety and half normality. He didn’t flinch or cringe or look at me with hate, he just said he was the same, and my shame started to deflate a little. I started to breathe full breaths for the first time in so long, and I started to believe maybe I wasn’t so fucking wrong.
The next time I tried to come out to somebody I was sixteen and it was my mother. I’d spent years in torture and isolation trying to figure myself out, who I really was, what it was all about. I told her I was bi and she was quiet for a while. After I prompted her for a response she said “but how do you know?” with a condescending smile. She told me I was young, and that I hadn’t even slept with anyone so how could I possibly know what I am?? Rage is the only thing I could feel at that stage, HOW COULD I KNOW WHAT I AM? The same way you knew you weren’t what I am, that’s how. I’ve spent years hating myself for being this way, and this is the stupidity I’m faced with now? Like I had just flippantly decided that I would announce something I wasn’t even sure of? I was floored, and thus thereafter the topic was purposefully ignored. The silence said all I needed to know, this was something I just wasn’t supposed to show, it’s just one of those things that was a no go. Certain people could be trusted with my secret, the thing that people didn’t seem to want to see, but I had to be very careful about who that would be.
So I shut it down and compartmentalised my difference and tried to survive. Three years went by before I opened that door again, to a trusted friend. I never intended to tell her, but she asked me in a way that seemed so tender, there were no teeth waiting to bite me, and even though it frightened me I told her. She didn’t even care, she was just curious, maybe she was questioning things in herself like some of us do. That was the first time I really knew that I wasn’t my shame and I wasn’t my pain and I wasn’t some thing to be hidden away. I decided then to be more open. To live authentically and do what felt right for me. But I still remained private about it unless asked explicitly - then I would answer as honestly as I knew how, because truthfully I’m still figuring all of it out. I’ve learned so much about diversity and gender and sexual identity and sometimes I find the right words that seem to fit, and other times the pressure of a label exhausts me and I get sick of it.
Sick of trying to classify myself under certain banners, sick of people asking things without any thought of manners.
I know on the grand spectrum of things I am not at all like them, I fall somewhere else along the Kinsey scale. Maybe that means in a way I fail the people like me, because I can’t cement things or write it in concrete and sign it to make it complete. Or that sometimes I still find myself in certain situations where I’m being discreet, holding my candour for fear of ramifications and slander. Maybe I’m not full of pride, maybe because for so long all I could do was hide. This makes me feel so guilty, I should be proud of who I am unapologetically! Not just for me but for the sake of visibility, so that maybe more people can see - we aren’t wrong, we don’t have any agenda other than to be able to be! Just to be; to live with an open vulnerability and tranquility and to be able to do it safely!! I’m sorry, that I could not join in on the pride but maybe you’ll know why; it’s hard to celebrate something that for most of your life you’ve had to justify to people, to justify to yourself, for most of your life you’ve carefully withheld.
— 

“Internalised Homophobia - Where Is My Pride?”

Pride month is such a wonderful thing and I know it is over now but it inspired me to share this. It’s intensely personal, not very well written and lengthy, but I wanted to be able to share some of my experiences regarding this topic. In no way do I speak for the whole LGBT+ community in this post and it’s simply a personal journey that I wrote out for catharsis. 

Dandelions: finished summary!

again, I’m sorry I had to stop this project. I had a LOT more story to tell and my depression just wasn’t letting me have the motivation to do so. School is starting back up again and I knew I wouldn’t be able to work on any comic pieces once that happened so here is the summary of what I want to do with the rest of the story! 

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Our Little Secret - Part Twelve

Summary: It’s your first hunt back from your injury. Dean thinks he has a way to help you through the soreness

Series Masterlist

Characters: Dean, Sam, Reader

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Kink(s): Wax Play

Word Count: 5000

Warnings: Smut, language, wax, angst

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. I’m really loving these character and this series. Thank you for your wonderful responses. A special thank you to the people who looked this over for me.

This is unbetaed, all mistakes are my own

***THE TAGLIST FOR THIS SERIES IS CLOSED**

“Your turn,” Dean hands you the shovel, “I dug the last one.”

“Oh come on Dean,” Sam protests, “she’s had more than a month off, she-”

“She’s standing right here,” you look pointedly at Sam, taking the shovel from Dean, “I got this, you boys just stand there and look pretty.”

Sam rolls his eyes, Dean chuckles, “Do you remember how to do this sweetheart, it’s been awhile.”

“Shut up, even rusty I can dig a grave twice as fast as you,” you can’t help but smile, pushing the point into the ground, taking out the first shovel full of dirt.

“Do you want me to time you?”

You flip him off, continuing to dig as they talk for a bit, discussing the corpse that in a matter of time you will be salting and burning. After about ten inches, another shovel hits the hard ground a few feet from yours and you look up to see Dean there, “You were moving too slow.”

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A love of ice and thunder

Pairing: Loki x Thor x Reader.

Warnings: Smut and LOTS of it; a bit of drama too. There’s a lot of everything going on here so you might pick your blanket because this is also long af.

Summary: When Jane leaves Thor, in your heart you know he should stay with you, but as time goes by, his brother realizes that there is more to it.

A/N: I need Jesus, and when you finish reading this, you’re gonna need him too. My characters know they need Jesus, so that should tell you something. Feedback? It won’t hurt!


You poured some shampoo on your hand and gently started to massage your scalp with it. “So,” you started feeling the soft foam form in your hair, “I got a call from your brother yesterday,” you let the warm water run down your soapy self as you awaited for your boyfriend’s answer.

“Really? Thor knows how to make a phone call?” Loki snickered from the toilet seat. “Well, that is quite the surprise,” he shook his head.

“The thing is that he broke up with Jane just a few days ago and even though it wasn’t a lot, she’s given him some time to move out,” you casually said trying to elicit some kind of reaction from his uninterested being. “He’s really bummed, y’know?”

“I bet,” Loki pondered, “I’d be utterly destroyed if you dumped my ass,” he conceded, “but why are we talking about him anyway?”

“Well, I’ve been doing some thinking about it and… I wanted to ask you if he could stay here for a while,” you stuck your head from the end of the curtain and looked at him innocently. “I kinda owe him that…” you bit your bottom lip.

“How so?” He ran his fingers through his ebony hair.

“When SHIELD first sent me to the States I ended my renting contract with my landlord and I moved there, and when the agency died after the whole Winter Soldier thing I realized I had no home to go back to; Jane was still there and when your brother came to earth he stayed with her, so he asked Jane if I could live with them until I got my own place…” you sheepishly said as you rinsed the shampoo from your head. “I stayed there with them for like 4 months, so maybe he could stay here for that same time too, if you don’t mind,” you broke it down. “Can you pass me the towel, please?” You reached out your arm and he handed the soft cloth.

“What about our life?” He asked in a concerned voice. “I mean let’s face it, love; we are not the quietest ones and Thor isn’t either; he snores like a chainsaw,” he pointed out.

“Yeah, but we’ll have to be a bit more quiet and just… hold on?” You drew back the curtain and got out with Loki’s help. “Let me return him the favor, it’ll be for just a little, okay?” You looked at him with puppy eyes, it always worked with him. “Can we?”

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he shook his head and unmade the towel, making it fall onto the humid tiles. “I might consider it,” he effortlessly lifted you in his arms, making you wrap your legs around his waist, “but only if you bribe me,” he mischievously smiled and headed for the room.

And just a few days after that, Thor was setting up this few belongings in the spare room of your apartment. He was really embarrassed for having to ask you that. He knew he was invading your privacy and your couple life with Loki, but he really didn’t have much choice or friends in the United Kingdom.

“It’s okay, big guy,” you placed a hand on his shoulder when he sat on the bed in defeat. “I know it hurts and all, but… you’ll be fine eventually, give it some time and you’ll see how things turn alright,” you shrugged lightly, “besides you’re living with us now, we’re gonna have fun!” You smiled widely and wrapped your arms around his shoulders. He rested his head on your chest and wrapped his arms around your waist. “Now come, and we’ll ask for something to eat for dinner,” you said.

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Problematic

Pairing: Tom holland x reader

Summary: Reader has been dating tom for a while and makes a great friendship with Anthony and Sebastian, so naturally she joins the #RoastTomHollandSquad™ (based on this interview )

word count: 1542


Permanent Tag list: @jor-da-na , @isucaf , @namlessgirl

If you want to be added or removed from my permanent tag list let me know!

Masterlist

Originally posted by parkrpeters

Being Tom Holland’s girlfriend wasn’t an easy task, but someone had to do it, right?. Being away from him sucked at the beginning, but ever since last year you had started coming to the recording sets along with him and Harrison, so everything worked great for you guys.

Tom loved having his girlfriend next to him everyday, not worrying about distance ruining their relationship, and the fans and press loved you! Even his castmates, whom Y/n had developed a great friendship with.

Following Tom around his crazy schedule had many negatives, such as being sleep deprived all the time, but it also had it’s perks. You got to tag alone as to many of the press events and conventions, such as today’s D23 expo.

You had come with Tom to the reveal of the Infinity War trailer and people had loved it! All the fans had gone absolutely nuts when they saw it, and wanted to know even more about the upcoming movie.

Right now all the cast was being interviewed in pairs about the movie and their characters. You stepped away, trying to give Tom some space and deciding to gander around.

That was until you heard Tom’s name being called, followed by a series of laughs. As you turned around you realised it was Anthony and Seb, chatting with some interviewer.

“Hey Y/n come here!” Anthony called out for you as he turned around to the girl interviewing them “She will tell you how awful he is, after all; she has to deal with him on a daily basis. Can you imagine that?”

You laughed as you approached them, realising what this was about. They were, once again, roasting your boyfriend’s ass with the press.

It all started a couple.months back, when Anthony called Tom a little asshole, and his beef towards him had only increased ever since, dragging Seb along the way. It was pretty hilarious if they asked you.

“Y/n Seriously, how you do it? How can you stand him all day?”

“Well, why do you think I’m not with him right now? A girl needs her breaks”

The two actors laughed with you, deciding to have some more fun at Tom’s expense.

“Was he annoying you? Have you given him his juice box yet?” Seb asked, looking genuinely concerned, but still using his teasing voice.  

“I’m not his nanny! If he wants a juice box he can get it on his own!” You said, trying to look serious and offended before continuing. “Besides that’s Harrison’s job”

This time Anthony, Seb and even the interviewer bursted out laughing at the mention of Tom’s “assistant”.

The interviewer decided to play along with your little teasing toward Tom, joining in the conversation.

“Y/n, you’ve been dating Tom for some time now; how you keep up with his little attitude problem and all the special requests he has?”

“Let me tell you it’s not an easy task, but honestly that why I keep Harrison around, he can keep track of his needs while I enjoy the benefits”

“So that’s it Y/n? You just going to let his best friend take care of his needs?”

“Well, not all his needs if you catch my drift, but any other stuff he can take care off.”

Anthony interrupted the conversation, trying to sound sarcastic about your last comment. He tried looking surprised as he raised both of his eyebrows and stared at the interviewers camera.

“I guess Spider-Boy is a real man now”

“He is, Anthony, but he still acts like a little boy”

“The weirdest thing is” Seb continued, as everyone’s attention focused back at him. “He has this weird personality swings! You can be with Tom the little boy sipping on his juice box, and next thing you know you’re with Thomas the old man who likes his tea without sugar!”

You laughed along saying. “He looks 15, acts like he is 8, but is secretly 64”

You were about to step out of the interview, but Anthony wasn’t done roasting Tom.

“Wait, he likes tea without Sugar?! as if this kid could be any more problematic!”

“Tell me about it” You said as you rolled your eyes, pretending to be annoyed. “ He is a big problem when cooking dinner. He has this weird diet going on and can only have certain stuff”

Seb laughed as he hugged you from besides while he said. “That’s kid is just a huge problem”

The interviewer had noticed how close you seemed to be with the cast, and decided to comment on it.

“I can feel like there is some strong friendship here! How did that happen?”

Anthony decided to answer on the question as he hugged you from the other side, making you look tiny between them both.

“Well, at first when she arrived to the sets we thought she was going to be a huge diva like her boyfriend, however when we finally talked to her she seemed like a pretty chill girl, right Seb?”

“Yeah, after we hanged out the three of us we decided to keep this kiddo around” He said as he ruffled your hair, with a friendly smile.

“Is that so Y/n?” said the interviewer, trying to get as much info as she could.

“Well, also our hatred for Tom brought us even closer.”

“Well, there you have it folks! An inside on what is working and living with Spiderman:Homecoming Star Tom Holland, by not other than Anthony Mackie, Sebastian Stan and Tom’s lovely girlfriend Y/n Y/ln.”

The interview finally ended, as the interviewer went back to her job and you were left with both boys. You kept on talking about random stuff until you noticed Tom approaching you.

“Oh no! The diva is back!”

Anthony laughed as Tom made a funny face at him, while grabbing your hand. You gave Tom a quick peck before you were interrupted again.

“Hey Thomas, you’ll never believe the great interview we just had! And Y/n joined us! But I guess you’ll just have to wait until later to see it”

Anthony had a devilish grin in his face as he stared at both of them. Seb was trying not to burst out laughing as he looked at Tom. The boy looked at the girl with a questioning and confused look, wondering what that was all about, however dropping it as they were called for pictures with the cast.

“Go Tom, I’ll wait for you over there alright?”

“You’re not getting away without telling me alright?”

Finally Tom turned around and went to join the whole cast for more pictures and interviews.

The rest of the day went by rapidly until it was the end of the day and you went back to the hotel with Tom.You got into your room, hoping to get a good night of sleep, however Tom was not letting things go by.

“Hey babe, what was that interview about?”

“Ummm? What interview?”

“The one Anthony just send me through twitter? The one he mentioned you joined”

You got a little preoccupied at the thought of Tom watching it. Sure, it had all been jokes, but you didn’t want him to get angry or fight about that stupid thing.

“We were just kidding Tom- You know Anthony, he started his beef and I- I might have joined them” You kept playing with your hair and glancing down, getting a little nervous at his reaction.

Tom noticed your behaviour as he seated down, holding you from behind. “I won’t get mad love, I know you were kidding.”

You let out a breath you didn’t knew you were holding before turning around and kissing him, before he pulled back and asked. “Well, can I see the interview?”

You sighed as you let out a nod and Tom pressed on the link. The title read “Anthony Mackie, Sebastian Stan and Y/n Y/ln trash talk new Marvel Star??. Honestly these sites did anything to get a couple of views.

The interview came up showing the beginning without you, until you finally joined and continued. You watched as Tom laughed at some of the comments, and made some faces at others. It was kind of cute actually.

He finally turned to face you as he raised his left eyebrow at you. Great, you could feel a comment coming your way

“Sooo, I’m a big problem uhh?”

He got close to your face, almost brushing his lips next to yours. His eyes had gotten dark and was staring at you with a hungry look as he moved his hands to your legs, gently stroking them. You decided to tease him a little bit as you looked innocently at him, grabbing him by his neck.

“You can be very problematic”

“I’ll show you how problematic I can really be”

Tom finally closed his eyes and kissed you hard, as he pressed you against the couch. He grabbed your legs and lifted you with him, taking you to the bed and dropping you in it, as he got above yo and removed his shirt, kissing you once again.

Yep. Being Tom Holland’s girlfriend wasn’t easy, but hey, someone had to do it.

Imagine

Here’s my meta about the last clip of episode 5.

  • Our intro shot of the karaoke bar introduces our players. I’m especially interested in how we see Mari and Sara twice each (and sharing one shot).
  • May I just say: I am glad my son Eskild is alive and Extra.
  • We have Chris talking to Sara (we don’t see Sara’s face but it’s her jumper) 👀
  • In general we have a big focus on couples (including Evak) and russebussen people. Showing, again, this season’s themes (love and identities/belongings).
  • We have some Chris and Eva talking about wiring money, which seems like foreshadowing to the russebuss contract and payment.
  • Even is about to sing and no one ships Evak more than Magnus.
  • @newlevelofdesperate​ wrote a great meta about Even singing “Imagine” by John Lennon. I agree with most of it.
    I’ll just add that the song is ironic, just like “I’m Not In Love” in s3e5. “Imagine all the people living life in peace.” Sana is feeling the song at the moment. She feels that everything came together, finally. But it’s not true. She wished she could create world peace (if you gave her the power to do so she would, she really would). But she can’t. Some things are beyond her reach and she still hasn’t managed to reconcile her two identities (Norwegian & Muslim).
    Also, I think the song is as much an Even song as a Sana one. Once again.
  • We barely see Mikael walk in, and Elias and the gang look around. Yousef seems to be looking in the crowd for Sana. 
  • No shot of the squad until we get a shot of Even seeing them. Then Magnus and Jonas turn to see where Even is looking (not Isak or Mahdi) and we get another shot of balloon squad: no Mikael. Adam and Mutta seem unconcerned. Elias though sees Even and is not smiling (but he’s not looking mad either).
    He grabs Yousef who was smiling towards Sana and…the smile falters.

[this is getting long so I’m adding a “read more”]

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{Special} College!AU Johnny
  • major: film & television 
  • minor: business 
  • clubs: rather than clubs, johnny always has some part in other classmates movies/set productions so,,,he has no time for clubs LOL
  • sports: was humbly signed up for track and field by ten but the only good thing about his long legs is jumping over hurdles,,,otherwise he’s slower than a turtle much to everyone’s surprise 
  • goes through what his friends call “phases” every other week,,,,,and it usually has to do with whatever project he’s most immersed in
  • and that means one week,,,,when he was helping out the french exchange students he walked around campus in a beret and refused to eat bagels - only croissants. then he was working on an action scene and signed up for martial arts on the the quad,,,,,,or that one time they were trying to do a historical bit and johnny almost bought a hanbok on amazon for fifty bucks and taeyong had to physically remove the laptop from his dorm in order to stop him
  • no one is surprised that he’s a film major,,,,,tbh he’s always been creative and outspoken so the industry fits him
  • the shocking part is his minor,,,,because is business really something???? johnny has any interest in
  • and johnny always dramatically puts his hand over his forehead and is like “in THIS day and age all that matters is MONEY no one cares for the ART-”
  • everyone is like ok we get it but johnny just siGHS like the whole world is over and slumps in his chair and is like i know ill never make it,,,,,,,ill have to be a slave to the system a COG in the machine another worker bee - but wait did i tell you guys about this GREAT idea i had last night for a movie so basically the main character is a zombie alien and-
  • talks a mile a minute,,,,,seriously even when his opinion or comment is unneeded,,,, but he’s trying his best and he’s always trying to lift the mood and make people more confident
  • like he IS the person in the friend group whose there for anyone when they need him,,,,, is the person who makes ten smile when he’s down, helps cheer up doyoung about the future,,,,, and even gets taeil out of the dumps (which is a rarity, but,,,,,,,wow is it harD to cheer him up - tbh only johnny is capable)
  • tells people to have a super-duper fantastic great day after seeing them in the coffee shop,,,,,and the person will be like do i//?? even know him??? probably not but johnny is trying to spread that positivity
  • and it works !!! because when he’s smiling and laughing he looks so soft and approachable 
  • but at the same time,,,,when he’s really working on a scene or on a plan for filming,,,, he adopts an entirely different aura 
  • ten calls it the ‘youngho effect’ meaning that silly johnny is gone and now it’s down-to-business youngho and during finals week,,,,,,is when it’s the WORST
  • like people don’t even recognize him and thats hard considering his fashion and height stand out ,,,, but seriously the stern, concentrated look on his face makes his whole appearance seem different
  • yuta is always like “youngho is sexy and johnny is cute” and johnny is just like ?????? are you- flirting with me??? or are you just commenting and yuta is like ;) it’s hard to tell i know but no im just saying my dude
  • johnny is also super charitable ,,,, like find him helping every last single person in his studio effects class or dramatic writing
  • which is why he barely gets sleep because he’ll be up with a group of writers or on film location for work that isn’t EVEN HIS but,,,, he really likes film and he really likes seeing and testing out new things so his ability to say no is down the drain
  • unless it’s doyoung asking for extra change to get coffee then johnny is like lol no jokes jokes
  • oh also him and ten are practically inseparable and they sometimes do what taeyong refers to as “comedy acting” on the quad which is really just them arguing over something dumb like is trump REALLY an overgrown cheeto but also everyone on campus loves it
  • minus their ACTUAL friends who are like can you two please be quiet for like a minute and ten and johnny are both like excuse me no and taeil is like rip my ears
  • but they’re best buddies,,,,,,,it’s very adorable 
  • ten’s dad even calls johnny to ask if ten is doing well in uni and johnny always try to make something up before ten steals the phone and has to explain in rushed thai that NO he didn’t get a tattoo on his forehead
  • accidentally got confused for being a part of the uni mens volleyball team because of his height
  • misses chicago and has pictures up of it and his family in his dorm and everyone is like wow johnny you’re such a sentimental guy but like LMAO HE REALLY IS HE CRIED DURING THE LION KING anyway
  • you’re not a film student at all,,,,,you’re actually pretty camera shy and so you think watching movies is cool and all but you’d like,,,,,,never dream of being an actor or something like that
  • which is ok because your major has nothing to do with that line of work and your part-time job is as a dog walker in the city on weekends
  • and one weekend you’re doing your job,,,,,the last dog you’re walking for the day is a cute corgi named mr. squiggles 
  • when suddenly someone taps you on the shoulder and to your shock you turn around and see ???? johnny
  • who you know just because a friend of yours is in a class with him and he’s kinda hard to miss ,,,,,,, he’s basically a walking skyscraper 
  • but you’re like “oh h-hi?” assuming he might have recognized you from uni but johnny isn’t looking at you
  • he’s looking at mr. squiggles and then at you and going 
  • “you two would be perfect for my project! have you ever wanted to do acting???”
  • for a second you think you might just be making this up in your mind but you blink a couple of times and johnny is STILL standing in front of you
  • looking more excited than mr. squiggles whose small stubby legs are pawing at johnny’s jeans and asking for him to bend down and pet him
  • and you’re like “uh,,,,,,n-no?”
  • johnny does bend down,,,,giving the corgi a couple of pats on the head only to look up at you again and go “but i think this dog has!!!! do you think you could be in my film?”
  • johnny’s eyes turn up as he smiles,,,looking at you almost expectingly,,,,,
  • until you scoop up mr. squiggles in your hands and shake your head explaining that for one,,,,,the dog isn’t yours,,,,,,this is your job and two,,,,,being filmed is a bit-
  • johnny’s smile drops into a childish pout and he reaches out to scratch the pups ear going “but you guys are perfect for the scene,,,,,and it’ll be short!!!! can you ask his owner??”
  • and you wanna be like excuse me i gotta go im getting a call but then u know,,, johnny goes to uni with you so maybe not making a fool of yourself is the right call so you just shrug and mumble that you’ll ask 
  • johnny’s grin returns and he quickly takes something out of his back pocket,,,,,which you realize is a scrap of notebook paper with a number scrawled on it
  • and he’s like i make this in case i find people on the street i want to cast,,,,,text me if the owner says yes!!! ill keep the spot open for you and -
  • he motions to mr.squiggles in your hands and you go “oh his name is mr. squiggles” and johnny bursts into cheerful laughter like “that’s PERFECT!! ill be waiting for your message”
  • and with that he’s off,,,,,you left holding the dog and the paper with his number and thinking to yourself that,,,,maybe johnny will just,,,,,,,,,,forget?
  • i mean he probably doesnt even know you go to the same uni,,,,,you reason as you put mr.squiggles down and go back to your walk
  • ,,,,,,out of curiosity though when you return him to his owners you ask ,,,,, would they let him be in a movie some time and the owner claps their hands together and is like ofc!!!! mr.squiggles is a born STAR!!!!! why is a friend of yours looking -
  • and you’re like nope no im just asking see you next saturday
  • come monday you’ve basically forgot about the whole thing,,,convinced johnny is popular enough to find other people to act for him
  • when you’re waiting in line to get coffee at the cafe and someone goes “hey!!!! what did mr.squiggle’s parents say?”
  • and it’s,,,,loud so everyone turns to look at you because mr.squiggles-?
  • and you’re like,,,what who??? only to see johnny standing behind you in line and you’re like oh myGOD
  • and he’s like “i knew id seen you before!!! cool that we go to the same school, so can you guys do it-?”
  • and you’re like “o,,,oh they said n-no so im sorry but-”
  • johnny clicks his tongue but waves his hand and is like nO SWEAT we can find another dog you walk dogs right????? do you think anyone else would be cool with it??
  • and you’re like dogs? what are dogs? idk any dogs? ahahahah
  • but johnny is like you told me you walk dogs,,,,,right??? im sure someone is ok with having their pup on screen plus it’s for a class so really-
  • your turn to order comes up and you quickly spout it out just to be like “oh, im sorry i have to go-” to johnny
  • rushing over to the pick up counter and thankfully,,,,a small black coffee is fast to make,,,,so you grab it and johnny makes a point to try and call out to you but you’re like class!!!! gtg!!!!
  • and with that you’re gone,,,,,looking solemnly down at the coffee in your hand and crinkling your nose because the last time you drank coffee was the last time you had a math final in high school
  • but also,,,,,why did johnny have to remember??? why did you have to bump into him???? what kind of weird coincidence???
  • but also you’re sure you’re off the hook this time,,,,like you told him mr.squiggles was unavailable and it wasnt like your classes ever clashed with film majors so you were home free
  • but,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
  • you weren’t
  • a couple of days later johnny saw you in the library,,, asking again if you were up for the part
  • unenthusiastically you explained that all the dog owners said no so,,,,,,and johnny said it was fine again that he knew some people with dogs so-
  • but you ducked out of there again saying you had a study group to meet up with
  • another time you were on the quad and johnny sat down next to you,,,,asking how you were and if you weren’t busy to talk
  • once again you checked your phone and pretended to take a call
  • and honestly,,,,,,you don’t know WHY you can’t just tell him you can’t act- or more like you don’t want to act
  • because you’re convinced he can find someone else so easily that the pursuant asking you ,,,,, you just didn’t get it
  • not until you overhear a couple of people talking about how they’ve never seen johnny hold out for this long,,,,,usually he’s the first one to start filming ,,,,, but something is taking him so long this time
  • and with a slightly guilty conscious you take out your phone,,,the paper with johnny’s number is still tucked in your wallet and you fish it out too,,,inputting it and typing out a text
  • ‘im sorry ive avoided you about this, but im not a,,,,,,,im not an actor. i dont want to mess up your movie so i hope someone else can be the better fit’.
  • you send it,,,,,hoping you weren’t being to blunt but an hour later your phone lights up and johnny’s reply is ‘that’s ok! im sorry for bothering you, it was really uncool of me to keep chasing you - i didn’t know you were uncomfortable and i was being a douche. tell mr.sqiggles i still think he’s a star in the making!’
  • smiling down at the cute response and the line of dog emojis and stars you go back to your homework,,,,,but it’s a little hard because,,,,,,why’s johnny so much cuter to you all of a sudden
  • a couple of weeks go by and you stumble across what looks like a film set near the dog park you frequent on your job
  • and your entire pack starts tugging on their leashes in excitement and barking because of all the new people and cool looking cameras and you’re like “guys!!! calm down” 
  • and you notice someone turn around and it’s johnny??? he waves at you and you’re like “he-hey?? are you filming here??” and johnny nods and is like “it’s a little film im doing about a dog and their owner and they can like,,,,,,,talk to each other and the dog gossips about other dogs it’s kind of a comedy??? romance i guess”
  • and you’re like oo a romance featuring cute dogs cant go wrong with that and johnny is like exactly,,,,101 dalmatians,,,,,airbud - not romantic but dogs so
  • you giggle and you’re like well!! ill try to keep the kids from barking too much but!!
  • johnny grins and squats down,,, mr.squiggles running toward him like johnny’s been his owner for yEARS and licking his face and johnny is like it’s still a shame i couldn’t cast this lil guy
  • you smile,,,and johnny says he’s going to be filming for a bit but that it was nice talking
  • and you know,,, you go to the dog park and play a bit not noticing johnny whose struggling with the actors on set and some of the crew and usually johnny is really good with people 
  • but the way the lead isn’t getting along with the dog is stressing him out and at some point johnny is like “it’s fine, ill scrape this idea” and someone mentions that the deadline to hand it in is three days away and johnny is like “it doesn’t matter, i don’t think it’s going to work out and im not giving unfinished garbage to the professor.”
  • you look up seeing that most of the people are gone except for johnny and you pick up mr.squiggles and go over to him and you’re like “you look down,,,,,so i brought this guy to maybe help you smile?” 
  • johnny looks up from his head in his hands and gives a sad chuckle that you’ve never seen from him and you’re like whats wrong
  • and he’s like “i think,,,,im not going to be able to finish this.” and you’re like why not??? you had people here and stuff and he’s like sometimes things don’t work out
  • and you’re like do you have time?? and johnny mumbles that three days isn’t enough, even if the whole thing is fifteen minutes long
  • you see the defeat in his eyes,,,,which is hard to imagine since this is the johnny that never seems to give up
  • so with a tiny swallow you go “i,,,,,,,,,ill help. mr. squiggles too.”
  • johnny raise an eyebrow and shakes his head,,,,,saying that he can’t force you to help him, that’d be fucked up of him and you’re like you’re not!!!! consider it a change of heart
  • johnny motions to mr.squiggles and goes “didn’t their owners refuse-?” and you’re like “hahahah abOUT THAT,,,,,anyway what do we have to do??”
  • johnny explains the jist of the plot,,,,,you and mr.squiggles can understand each other and talk about the other dogs but you meet another owner who can speak to his dog too and you,,,,,basically fall in love
  • and you’re like giggling because ok,,,, a bit corny but u like it
  • and you’re like whose going to play the love interest?? and johnny looks around and is like i,,,, think im gonna have to do it because all the other footage is unusable. the dog tried to pee on the leads so -
  • and you’re like oh my gosh,,, well ok,,,,,,let’s try
  • to your surprise you’re not AS nervous in front of the camera as you thought
  • maybe because holding mr. squiggles calms you down or maybe it’s the way johnny is patient and encouraging 
  • but when all your individual cuts are done johnny is like “ok we have on thing left, where we meet and,,,,,well,,,,,,,mr. squiggles is supposed to tell you to ask me out” and you’re like oh,,, Oh,,, ok ,,,, well,, ahem
  • and johnny sets the camera to record and rushes over to sit beside you on the bench,,,pretending to look over at the other side of the park
  • and you’re like “oh,,,,shh ,,,, shh what? h- he isn’t cute???? i- what??? you want me to ask for his number???”
  • johnny turns around,,,putting his arm over the bench and going “are you talking to your dog?” and you jump a little almost forgetting the line and you’re like 
  • “i,,,,im not,,,,,” and johnny, effortlessly slides closer to you on the bench and is like “well, whoever told you to ask for my number is right - do you want it?”
  • feeling your cheeks glow red you nod and johnny is supposed to lean in closer but you’re kinda like !!! so you lift mr. squiggles up and he licks at johnny’s face and ,,,, after a moment you’re like im sorry!!!!! that wasn’t in the script
  • but johnny bursts into laughter and is like you know what,,,i think it’s a great ending shot 
  • you realize you’re close to having to drop the pups off so you gather mr. squiggles and tell johnny it was,,,,fun and that you hope he gets a good grade
  • johnny seems to want to say something,,, but you’re like im not avoiding you this time - i actually really need to go
  • and as you’re running back to get the rest of the dogs you hear him call out your name and he’s like “let me repay you with dinner sometime???” and you’re like “sounds good!!!”
  • after getting back to campus from work, you drop your things off in your dorm and you check your phone to see a text from johnny
  • ‘are you free tomorrow night?’ you smile,,,,thinking for a second and your roommate is like why do you look so happy - is it a date????? and you’re like WHAT,,,,,,NO,,,,,,,SHUTUP
  • but you say you are and the next night you meet up with johnny off campus and he’s telling you about this restaurant a friend of his opened and then you notice it,,,, the slight darkness under his eyes and you’re like johnny did you sleep??
  • and he’s like oh no i stayed up editing,,,, also this afternoon i had to help hyungsik with his shooting so 
  • and you’re like oh my god go home and sleep but he’s like no!! i gotta take you out and pay you for your help,,,,,and since i don’t have actual money please consider this food as payment
  • and you’re like shdlfkjds johnny and he’s like it’s good food,,,,,so???
  • even though he’s obviously tired,,, johnny still manages to keep up an exciting conversation and you try to get him to split the bill but he’s like nooooooo i am a respectful chicago gentleman 
  • and ur like ,,, does a respectful chicago gentleman try to mimic a parrot in a resturant and he’s like i see your point but let me live?
  • and johnny is ,,,, someone you never thought you’d hang out with one on one just because he’s bright and attracts attention 
  • and he’s a silly, handsome guy??? like???? getting near him seems like a feat but here you are,,, after diner walking to the arcade and johnny winning you a stuffed animal in one of those crane games but also completely losing to you in tekken 5
  • and you’re like,,,,, it’s nice to be like this with him and it’d be nice,,,,,,, to get to know him more
  • so you’re sad when the night ends and you guys are on your way back to uni on a crowded train and johnny keeps moving his body so no one is squishing up against you and it’s ,,,,,,,,, it is like a date but you refuse to let yourself cave to that mentality
  • but then as you get off at your stop, johnny’s hand slides into yours and it’s ,,,,, natural almost
  • and you get to campus and he’s like thanks for letting me take you out,,,and for being in my film
  • and you’re like haha,,, to quote you - no sweat!!! 
  • and it’s silent,,,but you’re still holding hands and you’re not quite sure what that means
  • until johnny goes “i don’t want to be awkward but - this was a date, right? can i call it a date?”
  • and you’re like OH WELL,,,,,,,,,um,,,,,,,,, and you’re like “i’d like if it was a date,,,,”
  • and johnny is like me too because then that means there can be more,,,,,dates,,,,,,,,for us,,,,,,,for me to take you on,,,,,,,,,am i making sense i feel like im not making sense
  • but you’re like!!!!! you are,,,,making sense,,,,,,
  • johnny grins and even in the nights dark light you can see the cute expression on his face and you’re like hey can you bend forward a little bit and he’s like oh?
  • and you lean up, kissing his cheek quickly before letting go of his hand and saying that you’ll see him ,,,, on the second date???
  • and you’re halfway across the quad to your dorm when you hear someone running behind you and you turn just to be tackled into a hug
  • and it’s johnny,,, you can tell by the way his hair tickles your cheeks and his frame is wide and he smells,,,,so distinct 
  • and he’s like “sorry,,i couldn’t wait till the second date,,,” and you’re like fldkjsde please,,,,
  • but it’s cute haha when he lets you go you guys wave goodbye and when you get home your roommate is like “ah, so how was the date?” and you’re like IT WASNT —- ok it was and it was amazing
  • dating johnny,,, is exactly what you all expect it to be
  • he’s an affection moNSTER and i mean that in the BEST way possible like he is FULL of love to give at ALL TIMES
  • forehead kisser extraordinaire 
  • showers you in compliments and talks about you to everyone he meets honestly the night after your first date ten,,,,,,in his pajamas half awake had to listen to johnny talk for exactly one hour and forty three minutes about everything that happened between you two and at the end of the night ten was like “i got it,,,,they sparkle like the stars in the sky ok can i go sleep- yes you told me about how they remind you of the best days of summer ok im going to sleep now jOHNNY SHUT UP”
  • for someone whose confident in their skills,,,, johnny got shy about showing you the end project of his film but when he did he was like “did you like it??” and you’re like yes!! im sorry for my bad acting also mr.squiggles says hi
  • and johnny is like tbh i love that dog and ur like more than me and he’s like yeah and ur like thats cool i love him more than i love you too
  • johnny: WHAT
  • you: dogs > boys, a cardinal rule
  • also you learned from jaehyun that the reason johnny stayed up all night to edit was because he was apparently watching the clips of you over and over again and being like they’re so cute,,,,
  • and you’re like no way
  • and jaehyun was like you don’t have to believe me but ten has a video and ten is like i do wanna see
  • and it’s true,,,,,johnny literally was sitting at his computer with the goofiest grin on his face looking at you like they’re adorable,,,, ft. ten’s snickering in the bg
  • johnny doesnt know ten took the video,,,, but when he found out he chased him across campus but tbh you just thought it was super cute of your boyfriend 
  • is tall and therefore whenever it rains he does this thing where he puts his hands over your head and is like “im ur umbrella” and you’re like ,,,,, im still getting wet and he’s like “,,,,,,,,,,listen im not a GOOD umbrella, but im YOUR umbrella” and you’re like oh my god you’re a dork that’s what you are and you’re my dork so it’s ok
  • johnny calls you love unironically and you’re like are you british or and he’s like WOW LET ME BE CUTE WITH YOU PLEASE 
  • once mark drew a flower on your wrist or something and johnny was like draw one on me too and mark was like why and johnny was like because we’re a couple mark and i want to match
  • im just saying johnny seo is a corny couple items guy like look at the man
  • thinks the most useless things are cute and buys them for you and you’re like johnny i didn’t really need this mickey mouse ice cream scooper and he’s like ok but it’s cute tho??? and ur like saVE YOUR MONEY YOUR MINOR IS BUSINESS And johnny is like IM TRYING IM AN IMPULSE SPENDER 
  • also everything cute just seemingly reminds him of you like the boy is heart eyes for you ok
  • probably a really loose-lipped drunk,,,,, honestly texts you like paragraphs about how he’s going to make a movie dedicated to you but the typing is l1k3 th*$ 
  • he’s late to dates a lot but not because he doesn’t care or something but because he’s always busy helping someone film and you don’t mind but you’re like johnny take a break and he’s like i will but also hyuk was telling me about this sci-fi animation he’s gonna do and he might need me-
  • and you just motion for him to open his mouth so you can put some food in it and you’re like shhh just eat first talk later (this is hard since johnny loves to talk,,,,,,,,,)
  • is dramatic about anniversaries and holidays but it’s romantic and cheesy like yes he bought you bear the same size as him for valentines day and YES he recited a monologue from ‘the notebook’ to you on your birthday because that’s who johnny is 
  • texts you about what outfit to wear and you’re like huh what is that and johnny is like im going though a hippie phase should i wear this tie-dye t-shirt OR this tie-dye t-shirt
  • and you’re like wear a white t-shirt right now johnny and put the tie-die away
  • him: but baby i-
  • you: right now. away.
  • asks you for updates on mr. squiggles and you once told the owner your boyfriend really likes their dog and the owner was DELIGHTED she invited johnny and you to dinner and it was,,,,,,the most funny thing
  • to see johnny get tipsy on wine and gush over movies from the thirties with this little old lady????? priceless 
  • johnny: you know she’s much older now but bettie davis was a hottie,,,,,
  • you: oh my god
  • johnny: i won’t lie,,,,,im still into john travolta the man hasn’t aged-
  • you: put the drink down
  • when you guys talk on the phone,,,,you’ve noticed that johnny’s voice gets lower at night and it’s really nice and you’ll never tell him because you know he’ll tease you but,,,,,,wow
  • speaking of other really nice things johnny had invited you over to his dorm while ten was away with family and you guys were supposed to use the blank wall and project some movies on it and cuddle
  • but at some point the movie was the last thing on your mind because johnny’s half-lidded eyes and lips spread apart are PRETTY hard to ignore
  • also johnny is such a,,,,,physical person that he knows what to do with his hands and his mouth and long story short you ended up tangled in mr seo
  • and only after did you realize that the movie was over and you were like ,,,,,, should i play another one
  • and johnny pulling you right back ontop of him was like no no there’s more important things to do
  • johnny is a show off when it comes to relationships so the next day doyoung was eating and was like whats that on your neck - you got a rash?
  • and johnny was like nah my s/o stayed the night and doyoung was like oh and mark choked on his rice
  • does this thing that when he’s thinking to fast he’ll switch from korean to english and then backtrack and translate what he said and sometime’s he’ll stutter over this or that
  • and you’re like johnny you’re so cute but gather your thougths you don’t alWAYS have to be talking
  • and he’s just like,,,,,,,,,,you’re right but tbh if im not talking what can my mouth be doing and you’re like rolling your eyes but you’re like “kissing me?”
  • and he grins like eXACTLY come here
  • you guys kiss a lot just so you know like wanna know something about johnny? he’d kiss you till you were breathless jot that down
  • you asked him where his backpack was once and johnny was like i dont carry one everythings in my head
  • and you’re like what about that test in finance that you’re gonna have and his eyes got wide and he’s like i,,,,,,,,,,gtg get the notes off of someone see you later
  • told you his dream vacation isn’t chicago anymore,,,,like he wants to see his family so bad but he also wants to take a roadtrip with you and see you under all those stars beside him
  • and you were like we should do it sometime but i have a feeling we’d open the trunk and ten would be there
  • also you know this conversation has happened like one too many times
  • ten: you know, if you two have kids i want to be the godfather
  • you: what if we don’t, what if we adopt a cat or something
  • ten: then i want to be the godfather of the cat duh
  • you:
  • johnny: you know it ten, we’re brothers for life come and hug me
  • as silly and as romantic and fun as johnny is,,,,,he’s still got some reservations about himself and sometimes he jokingly,,,,mentions that it must be hard to love someone like him - always making mistakes or saying something embarrassing
  • but you always assure him that people aren’t supposed to be perfect, that you think he’s damn near close to it and you wouldn’t stop loving him over things that are only human
  • but if he does call you banana pumpkin angel in front of your friends again- and johnny is like fine fine ill stop using fruits for petnames,,,,,,,,,,,,my cherry sunshine universe and you’re like WHY do you INSIST ON BEING SO CORNY
  • and he’s like dont’ you love it though???? secretly??? just a little
  • and you’re like,,,,,,,,,,,fine yes i do god no wonder you’re a film major your brain is TOO Creative for it’s own good
  • johnny kissing up your arms to tickle you and make you feel better when you’re sad
  • also johnny would completely 100% let you borrow his sweaters and even if you’re wearing one just because it’s comfy and you have study hall 
  • he’d lean over to the person beside you two and be like “they’re wearing my clothes, don’t they look cute?” and the person is like ???? and you’re pulling johnny back over to you by the ear and you’re like boy
  • calls up the uni radio and requests that they play your favorite song every weekend without failure
  • and you’ll hear it and even if you’re not with johnny you can feel your heart burst because he’s the kind of boyfriend that remembers the smallest little details and shows you his love whenever he can
  • and there’s nothing better than having someone adore you like johnny seo adores you 

doyoung | jaehyuntaeyong | yuta | bangtan | vixx | monsta x | got7 + kard + amber | seventeen

|Soulmate| Peter Parker

Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: About a week ago you got your soulmate tattoo on your forearm that said ‘Y-You’re beautiful’ and you’ve interpreted it as a random guy on the street cat-calling you.

Warnings: hurt(ish) Peter, (sorry they don’t kiss lol so that’s it) 

Words: 745

A/N: I LOVE THE SOULMATE AU WHERE YOUR SOULMATES FIRST THING THEY SAY TO YOU IS TATTOOED ON YOUR FOREARM (imma twist it up a bit tho and have it temporarily be tattooed)

Part 2

Originally posted by starkquinzel

~~~~~~~~~

It was last Friday when it showed up.

I woke up late and in a hurry so I scurried out of my room into the kitchen. My moms eyes widened and then she sprouted the biggest grin ever.

“Finally!” She laughed. I looked at her like she was crazy. She sighed and pointed to my arm. I looked down. ‘Y-You’re beautiful’ was tattooed across my forearm. A slight blush crept across my cheeks.

“I-I have to go to school,” I said as I bolted out the door.

And that brings me here today, Thursday. I thought over this tattoo probably over a thousand time. I’m probably soulmates with a fuck boi or something. I kept on reading the tattoo as if I was walking around town at night and some random guy just passed me and said it, so I told myself to never fall in love with that man. A thick scream erupted through my thoughts. I looked down the street and a man with huge wings was flying past. I ducked as he flew overhead.

“I will do- anything to protect the people I love!” The man with wings said as he stopped and turned around. I looked back down the street as Spider-Man swung on top of a building.

“Same goes for me- that’s why I gotta stop you.” The few people along the street started to scream and run away. I backed against a wall as the winged man and Spider-Man fought. I glanced down the street, wondering if I should run for it. I decided that yeah… I might get crushed by this weird vulture guy but also I wanna get the hell out of here. So I ran.

As I got closer to the end of the street I heard a crash in an alley I just passed. I stopped and looked over my shoulder, then up above me. The man with wings was flying away. I sighed and ran back to the alley. At the end, there was a trashcan with Spider-Man laying across the top. He had seriously dented it bad. I ran up to him.

“Oh God-” I said as he lay there motionless. I jumped up on the trashcan and kneeled next to him. His mask was pulled over half his face. I shimmied the rest of his mask off and put two fingers under his ear. Thump thump. I let out a sigh of relief. He groaned and I put my hand on his chest and shook him. “Hey- hey- wake up. Are you ok?” I asked. He leaned up slowly and then hissed in pain. He suddenly clutched his forearm.

“Shit-” He groaned. His suit had a rip near the hand and he ripped it even more.

“What are yo-” The sight of his forearm shut me up. A thin worded tattoo was now burning away off his skin. The words ’re you ok?’ were all I saw and then it was gone. He looked up at me with a confused look and then all of the expressions on his face dropped.

He was cute. Like wow. He looked kind of familiar with those brown eyes and messed up locks of hair. I doubt he went to my school since my school was so small and I basically knew everyone there. He probably went to Midtown, the high school that was a couple blocks from my school. Was he my soulmate? Is that what happened? Would the tattoo disappear from my skin? I realized he was still starring at me with his mouth agape.

“W-What?” I asked, blushing.

“Y-You’re beautiful.” He said. I bit my lip and a sharp pain spread across my forearm.

“Ow!” I moaned. I lifted up my sleeve and looked down. My tattoo was burning away, just like his. I looked up at him and he was beat red. A scream sounded from a couple blocks away, causing Spider-Man to break eye contact with me.

“I-I-I have t-to go-” He stuttered as he jumped off the trashcan.

“Wait- will we ever see each other again?” I asked him. He thought for a moment.

“I’ll find you- trust me on that.” He smiled and grabbed his mask. I smiled back as he swung away onto the building. It turns out it was smart of me to trust his word because the next day after school, a little spider, who was out of his costume, met me on my walk home.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony being your sugar daddy + a “boobs guy” would include:

pairing: tony x reader

warnings: oh no hide your children this is about women willingly using their bodies and benefitting from it

a/n: hello i’m back after 4 months having graduated high school and being a bigger tony slut than ever before

also this is the longest “would include” i have ever written but i’ve been getting requests for this for months and it took me forever to get around to writing so enjoy

Keep reading

She’s Just Not That Into You » Part III (A Harry Styles Miniseries)

Miss the previous parts? Part One » Part Two

As always, this miniseries is dedicated to @stylesunchained. Thank you so much for reading the first two parts!  I hope part three is just as enjoyable for you all.

Let me know what you think! Happy reading.

Originally posted by glamour-divine

Although Harry had been disappointed to not receive your personal phone number, he still called “Megan” the next day to set up an appointment to see you. The earliest you can see him for a consulting appointment is in two weeks, and when Megan breaks the news to him, he nearly chokes on his morning tea.

Two weeks?

There wasn’t a logical way to see you sooner. There wasn’t a way to spin it in order for him to pop into your shop, especially considering he still had to sign the final papers to make the house his. How could he explain to you that he hadn’t quite sealed the deal yet, so you’d be decorating a completely hypothetical space? He’d already felt like an idiot in front of you, getting caught snooping around your bookshelves, and he wasn’t too keen on feeling like that around you anytime soon.

So, he waits.

He busies himself with packing up the items he knew he wouldn’t need: small, decorative sculptures, a majority of his books, the picture frames that littered nearly every spare surface of his home, his summer clothing that he knew would be completely unnecessary for at least five more months. Once he gets news that the final papers are ready to sign and the house is his, he cleans every nook and cranny of his current house, figuring it might as well be good to spruce it up for the new owners. He meets old friends for lunch, he takes his mother out for dinner, and he begs his sister to come over for a movie night.

And, of course, he reads. He reads the book you spoke so highly of, immersing himself within the worlds of each character, wondering which one you connected with most. Did you cry at the same parts he did? Did you have the same pit in your stomach that he experienced whenever the subject matter turned particularly dark? He needed to know what happened next, reading late into the night, promising himself he would go to bed after he finished the page he was on, but knowing he wouldn’t stop until he could no longer open his eyes.

The two weeks pass, but they feel more like a month and a half than they do a fortnight.

When the day of the meeting comes around, he peeks into the storefront, smiling at your name on the door. He meanders around your shop after checking in with Megan. She nods when he states his presence - a meek little thing with big brown eyes and a nervous giggle - and notifies you that “Mr. Styles is here,” via the bulky black telephone on her desk. He can feel the girl’s eyes on him as he walks around, recognizing some of the pieces from your website.

“Hi!” your voice echoes from behind him, your heels clicking against the concrete floor.

Harry turns around, fully expecting a normal salutation to escape his lips, but instead, his voice catches in his throat. You’re wholly professional, the version of yourself he saw in the magazine shoots. Cropped black pants with pointed-toe heels, a blazer rolled up to your elbows.

You look like you run the place - which, of course you do.

“How are you?” you ask before kissing his cheek and bringing him in for a hug.

That’s a bit better, he thinks to himself, remembering how previously, you’d greeted Nick more lovingly than you had Harry.

“Good, good,” he takes a step back from you, hoping your perfume had transferred onto him so he could smell you on him later - so he could pretend that reality wasn’t against him and that your scent was stuck to him for reasons other than a professional greeting. “Yourself?”

“Excited!” you clap your hands together. “Before we go back, let’s walk around a bit so you can get a sense of where I’m coming from, design-wise.”

He nods, pretending not to have already extensively researched “where you’re coming from,” and follows you until you stop in front of the mock room setups, pointing out some of your favorite pieces.

“Marble is really in,” you explain, tapping a stone coffee table. “But I try not to overdo it. If you like the look of marble - if you like this exact table, even - this would be the only marble piece I’d choose for whatever room.”

Taking his chin between his thumb and forefinger, Harry nods, inspecting the table and picturing it in his new living room. He likes it. Come to think of it, he liked everything. And it wasn’t just to appease you - there was no reason to like a chair just because you liked it - but he could envision nearly every piece in his new home.

“Just got these lamps in,” you turn one on. “I’m obsessed with them. Might snag them for myself,” you smile, clicking the remaining lamp on.

“How often does that ‘appen?” Harry smirks, raising an eyebrow.

“More often than it should,” you laugh. “I’m on this kick of deep greens, navy blue, and gold. Realize it’s not everyone’s cuppa tea, but if you see anything you like, there will almost always be different colors available,” you fluff a throw pillow, adjusting its position next to another.

Harry nods, imagining what his new place would look like decorated with a darker color scheme. He’d never been one for bold rooms - white was his go-to, with him being more concerned about how comfortable the furniture was instead of the color of the walls. You’d done Nick’s living room in bold, dark colors, and Harry loved it. It was his home, he’d told Harry. It wasn’t just a place he stayed and passed the time until he found somewhere else to live. It somehow felt right, even in the summertime, which Harry had initially worried about after seeing it for the first time. The home had Nick Grimshaw written all over it, and Harry was envious of how easily his best friend’s personality was packaged within every room.

He’d wanted that for himself, and you would be the one to give that to him.

He relishes in watching you work the room. You’re completely in your element, answering a couple of questions from Megan when the girl timidly approaches, letting her know that she was free to take lunch just as soon as your meeting with Harry wrapped up. You thank a middle-aged man for his order when he stops in to retrieve a rug, running to hold the door open for him as he heaves the rolled-up carpet over his shoulder. You make a joke with him as he leaves, winking at him with a smile and a wave of your hand.

Were you always this beautiful, or had Harry neglected to see how effortless your charm was?

No, that couldn’t have been the case. He’d noticed right from the second he laid eyes on you that you were something special; something different.

You lead him to the back of the expansive store, asking him questions about his current living space, wondering what pieces of furniture he wanted to keep and which he wanted to ditch.

“Oh my gosh!” you stop abruptly in the doorway to your office, clutching Harry’s shoulder as your eyes widen. “I didn’t even ask you if you wanted anything to drink! Water, coffee, tea?” you shuffle to the mini-fridge in the corner of the room, opening it and then closing it again. “I’m sorry. So sorry. I jump the gun sometimes. Get excited over the idea of a new space to transform and all that,” you laugh, rolling your eyes at yourself.

“Water would be great, thanks,” Harry smiles. He tries not to touch a hand to where you’d touched his shoulder, but he was worried you’d burned a hole through his shirt, what with how hot the area felt to him now.

He notices the familiar smell when he walks into your office, nodding his head when he sees that you’ve got yet another Diptyque candle burning on top of a filing cabinet - he can tell it’s pomegranate without even reading the label. He inspects the decor, loving the juxtaposition of clean lines set against rustic elements which make the room feel comforting and clean.

You pull out a chair with brightly colored fabric across the cushions, offering it to Harry before placing a bottle of water in front of him and walking to the opposite side of your desk.

“Okay,” you wake your computer up, scooting your chair closer to the screen. “I normally take clients through my portfolio so they can see the spaces I’ve completed, before and after I’ve gotten my hands on them.” You adjust the large monitor so Harry can view the screen as well. “Does that sound alright?”

“Of course,” he rubs his hands on his knees. “Whatever you normally do.”

You click on a file, asking Harry if he could see the screen properly. You show him your bigger projects - cafes and restaurants, along with office buildings - as well as clients who had hired you to renovate their houses. You mention how you tend to be inspired by patterns and colors, along with custom fabric you use to reupholster vintage, antique furniture.

“Do you reupholster them yourself?” he asks.

“The smaller pieces, yeah,” you nod, taking a sip from the cup of tea in front of you. “Like that chair you’re sitting on. I usually spend my free time refurbishing the pieces I find. I’ve done chairs, side tables, desks - all that,” you go on, clicking open a picture of one of your completed pieces. “Stopped doing the big stuff when my schedule got busier. Now, I work with a father-and-son team and they do the couches and loveseats,” you click again, a picture of you and two men sitting on a couch in what seems to be a workshop. “There we are,” you chuckle, quickly moving on to the next picture.

Harry knows that he can’t ask you to go back - what would you think of him if he’d insisted upon you showing him the picture again, just so he could see the way your legs crossed one over the other at the knee; how you smiled so easily, your eyes bright and your arms wrapped around the shoulders of both men. You were happy - genuinely happy - and it was a look you wore well.

“So which pieces from your current place do you want to keep?” you ask, meeting Harry’s eyes when he looks up from his lap. “If any…”

“Thinkin’ maybe,” he pulls at his bottom lip. “I’d wanna start fresh? To keep consistent?”

“Perfect,” you nod, minimizing your portfolio and bringing up a calendar. “Okay then,” you begin, moving the monitor back to its original position. “I’ll need to see your new place before I do any work-ups for you. Is there a time this week I can come and see the space?”

Harry’s heart jumps at the thought, even though your intent is purely professional.

You’d said the words, though.

You wanted to come over to his house. To his place. To his home.

“All I ‘ave is time,” he smiles. “So whatever works for you.”

Two days later, Harry finds himself waiting for you at his new property, the wintery London rain keeping him indoors as he paces back and forth in front of the large window overlooking the drive. It was just like London to rain on such a day - a day that should’ve been filled with bright sun to match the occasion - but he was used to the drizzle, no matter how much he didn’t agree with it.

His phone rings, the vibration in his back pocket causing him to jump. An unknown number flashes on the screen, and when he picks up, he’s surprised to hear your voice on the other line.

“So sorry, Harry!” your plea causes him to smile. You sound different on the phone - your voice is less smooth, but he lets the sound of it was over him, regardless. “I promise I haven’t stood you up! My shoot on the other end of town ran long, but I swear ‘m on my way! The GPS says ten minutes.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he chuckles. “I’ll be here. Drive safe, alright?”

You say you will and apologize again before hanging up. He grins as he looks out the window, biting his lower lip and furthering the dimples in his cheeks.

You’ve got his number saved in your phone.

He’s got your number now.

Whether it was your business phone or your personal phone didn’t matter. He had a direct line to you, and you to him. Knowing that he’d most likely never use it for reasons other than strictly professional, he felt nearly giddy as he saved your number, creating a new contact for you.

When you arrive, he’s surprised to see that it’s in a van with your logo on the side. Why - based on everything he knows about you thus far - is that the thing to make him hard? And why does his stomach flip so dramatically when he sees you step out of the driver’s seat, dressed in a worn-in flannel and jeans with paint splatters on them? You shuffle quickly over to the passenger’s side, shielding your eyes from the rain. When you emerge into sight again, you’ve got your arms full of materials like folders, tape measures, and a ruler. You laugh as you run up to the front door, shielding your papers beneath your plaid shirt.

How was Harry supposed to make it through the afternoon without a full-on stiffy with you looking like that?

“Hi,” he smiles when he opens the door, the security system beeping throughout the empty house.

“Hi!” you jump into the foyer, trying to catch your breath. “I’m so sorry - I hate being late!”

“Not a problem,” Harry assures you, noticing the pencil tucked behind your ear.

“And I’m sorry for looking suck a mess,” you peel your boots off with one hand, clutching your supplies close to your chest with the other. “Just set up a shoot and didn’t want to be even later in the name of looking presentable.”

Harry looks down at his hoodie and torn jeans, his hair flopping down onto his forehead, “Look more presentable than I do,” he chuckles.

You scoff, placing your boots neatly together, just as Harry did at your flat. He smiles at the unnecessary gesture, appreciative that you didn’t even bother ask whether or not he’d prefer you take your shoes off. Not that he’d have a problem either way - you could traipse mud and leaves all over his new home and he’d thank you for it.

“‘ve got the measurements and whatnot,” he explains as the two of you walk into the kitchen. “The original contractor has the blueprints and sent them over so we’d ‘ave ‘em.”

“Great,” you nod, inspecting the cabinetry from afar. “Think today’ll just be me scoping out the rooms, taking some measurements just to double-check,” you run your hands through your hair after setting down your armful of materials onto the counter. “Not that I don’t trust the contractor’s numbers. I’ve got my own system, though. Years of doing this makes me a creature of habit,” you smirk, flipping open a folder labeled STYLES, H. in bold letters. His heart jumps, thinking that you could’ve been the one to write it. “Wanna help me measure?”

“Of course,” he nods - maybe a bit too eagerly - as you reach for your tape measure and clip it onto the back pocket of your jeans.

The two of you walk through the empty house in your socked feet, Harry remaining quiet until you say something. You inspect each room, writing down how many windows are in each, commenting on where some crown molding will need to be replaced, recommending that the carpet be taken up and replaced with real hardwood to give it a more modern feel.

“Which colors are we thinking so far?” you inquire, unclipping the tape measure. Pulling out the free edge, you hand it to Harry, your fingertips touching his while you cock your head to the other side of the room with a smile. He’s frozen for a moment, willing you to reach out and grace your hand over his once more, but he’s snapped out of it by you walking away from him. He follows your lead, walking to the opposite wall from the one you’re standing against, holding the bulky measure down against the floorboard.

“Like the thought of a dark blue for this room,” he looks around, squatting on one knee when he reaches the wall. “Cozy livin’ room ‘n all that.”

“Good, good,” you grin. “Don’t want you to be swayed by my own likes and dislikes, but I promise you it’ll look good.” You make a quick chart with the ruler you’ve brought on the inside flap of the manila folder, muttering something about always needing to have straight lines, no matter if it was written in on an official document or the inside of a folder. It makes Harry smile, the admission of your quirk. “And if not, we can always change it. Paint is easy to change.”

“Don’t think’ll want t’ change it,” Harry assures, walking slowly backwards with the free end of the tape between his fingertips, crouching down once you’ve met him to measure the width of the room. “Whatever you’ve shown me so far, I’ve loved.”

You peek up through the hair that’s fallen down into your eyes as you scribble more numbers onto the folder, smiling at him in a way he forces himself to remember. His heart pounds in his chest - so much so that he hopes you can’t hear it - and he finds it difficult to swallow the lump that’s housed in his throat.

You work easily together as walk through each room, speaking vaguely about the initial ideas both of you had for the house. You don’t try to sell Harry on one idea or another - you offer a suggestion and if he doesn’t like it, you offer another until he’s comfortable. He feels relaxed, especially once you assure him that nothing is set in stone and that your feelings won’t be hurt if he doesn’t like something you suggest. This is his home, you remind him. It’s all up to him.

“What was the shoot about?” Harry asks as you measure the windows in what will eventually be his bedroom.

“Uneven decorating. Odd numbers look better,” you explain, sniffling slightly. “Always want to have one, three, or five of something, unless it’s like a side table or lamps. But anything on a wall - like framed art or pictures - and table decorations like figurines or candles look best when there’s an odd number of them.”

“You allowed to tell me which publication?” he smirks slyly, leaning up against the wall.

You twist your mouth, trying to conceal a smile. You think on it for a second, tucking your pencil back behind your ear. “Promise not to tell?” you reach out with your pinky, a pseudo-stern look on your face.

“Promise,” Harry links his pinky with yours, trying to conceal his smile by keeping his lips pressed tightly together. How could he say no to a pinky-promise imposed by a gorgeous woman? There were laws against it, he thinks.

“I’m serious!” you scoff, dropping your hand to your side. “I’ll know it was you if you say anything. If you even mention it to anyone - especially Nicholas Grimshaw - I’ll never speak to you again.”

He clears his throat, rubbing his nose twice. He closes his eyes, forcing himself to wear the same stern look you’re sporting. When he opens his eyes, you’re still staring at him intently.

“Swear,” he nods.

“And then you’ve gone and broken a pinky promise, too. Which in my books…” you raise your eyebrows and shake your head with a twitch of your pointer finger in front of you. “It’s HGTV Magazine. From the US.”

“That’s like a major TV channel there, innit?”

“Yeah,” you nod slowly, your eyes widening at the thought. “Now they’ve got magazines. And paint. And furniture. And decor. ‘ve got the market cornered over there. Huge, huge company. Like…massive.”

“And you’ve never been featured in the States, ‘ave you?”

“No,” you nearly whisper.

“That’s a big fuckin’ deal, then!”

“Guess so,” you chuckle, running your hands through your hair. “Thanks for that.”

“Absolutely,” Harry laughs, knocking your shoulder with his knuckles. “Congratulations. It really is a huge deal.”

He knew you were successful, but hearing about how you set up the studio to look like a living room today and would be going back tomorrow in order to get your portrait taken in the room makes him realize just how successful you are. A four-page spread, including an interview on how you’d taken London by storm and your influences would be seen within the American market soon. Their words, not yours, you assured Harry.

As the two of you walk through the rooms on the second floor, he asks how you started within the industry. You explain to him that you went to school to be a financial advisor and specialized in small business accounts. You were a pencil-pusher, you told Harry, and you were stuck in an office all day long. You’d spend your weekends refurbishing antique furniture, finding that you’d had a knack for it. It made you happy - so happy that it was the only thing that got you through the monotony of your work week. Although you loved your clients and always enjoyed the pride that came with their wins, you weren’t especially happy in your job. Something had to change.

After agreeing that all of the light fixtures upstairs would have to be replaced, you went on to talk about how even though you saw how much stress your clients were under running their own businesses, you couldn’t shake the feeling of wanting to begin your own business.

“Put my life savings into my first shop,” you flick off the hallway bathroom’s light. “I was eating Ramen nearly every night. Went without electricity in my apartment for a week because I didn’t ‘ave enough money to pay for lights at the store and lights at home,” you laugh. “Feels like such a long time ago…”

You started out selling furniture and other decor items. It was tough, but little by little, you made progress. Eventually, one of your regular customers asked if you were interested in working with her as an interior design consultant for her company. It helped get your name out, and soon you were redesigning spaces for people you could’ve never imagined.

Harry admires how smart and brave you are - he can understand how scary it is to go it alone without knowing the results. He was going through it right now. He was in a more privileged position, sure, but he was still unsure of what the future held, and he could appreciate how much courage it took to start over. It made him look at you in a different light - a light that allowed him to see the struggle you’d gone through, working you way from nothing to one of the best in your field. He’d envied the confidence that you sported when it came to your work and wondered if he, himself, would ever feel that.

Once you’re finished taking down all of the information you need, you follow Harry back downstairs.

“Still raining,” you frown, gathering all of your materials. “Does wonders for the hair.” You pretend to flip it over your shoulders. The natural state of it brought out by the weather makes Harry want you all the more.

“Ye’ look great.”

You tut, rolling your eyes a bit, but thank him nonetheless. “So, ‘ve got to take off,” you state, your body language pulling you back to the foyer. “But I really am so excited to get started on the mockups,” you hop a little. “It’s a beautiful space and we can start from scratch, which is when I have most of my fun.”

“‘m excited too,” Harry smiles.

“‘ll have Megan call you when I’m done with the renderings,” you slip your boots back on. “Should take no longer than a week. So count on next Thursday?”

“Yeah,” he nods. “And congratulations again on the magazine - really is a big deal.”

You tilt your head to the side, all of your features softening. “Thank you, Harry,” you smile coyly. You squeeze him a bit as you hug goodbye, the materials in your arms pressed between the two of you creating a barrier that Harry would rather be without. “I had fun today.”

“I did, too.”

He watches you run to your work van, leaping over a particularly large puddle. He laughs to himself as you struggle with your keys before unlocking the driver’s door, diving into the vehicle with a sigh that he can’t see. He watches as you push your mussed-up hair back, noticing him standing in the front window. You wave with a knowing smile before turning on the engine and backing out of the drive.

It’s that smile - that sly smirk - that pushes Harry over the edge that night.

He didn’t want to touch himself, but he’d been rock hard ever since he saw how beautiful your ass looked in your paint-splattered work jeans as you ran to the car. He didn’t want to defile you in his mind as he stroked himself in the shower, water running down his shoulders and back as he faced away from the spray. He didn’t want to moan your name as his balls tightened, the images of you naked and begging for him littering his mind to the point of no return.

But, he did.

He had to.

Nobody would know - it would be his secret - but if he didn’t jack off to the thought of you, he was sure he’d lose his damn mind.

He pictures you sporting the same upturn of your lips from earlier as you ride him, your flannel from that day still on, yet unbuttoned to reveal your breasts as you grind down against him. You know what you do to him, and your smile tells all. He imagines how beautiful you’d sound as he gripped your hips, slowing your movements to nearly a stop while he pushes up into you, groaning at the gasp you give him in return.

He’d never wanted to be inside someone as much as he wanted to be inside you. He wants to feel your breath against his ear, his name across your lips, your fingertips gripping his shoulders. He wants to know what you taste like - sweet, probably, like the candles you burn. He wants to know how warm you are; how wet he can make you by just the touch of his lips to yours. He wants to hear your moan - feel it vibrate down his cock while he’s in your mouth, that gorgeous pout of yours wrapped around the head of him.

He wants it all, but he can’t have it, so his hand will have to do.

A part of him feels guilty when he cums on the shower wall, his splotchy vision and ringing ears indicating that he gave in too quickly. But, fuck. What was a man supposed to do? You’d smelled so good; your stories never bored him; you were becoming a global success and you’d accepted to work with him.

And your ass? In those jeans?

He was done before he ever began, as far as that was concerned.

He walks out of the shower on shaky legs, a white bath towel wrapped loosely around his waist. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, he takes his head in his hands and grunts.

“Fuck’r you on, Styles?” he asks himself.

He leans back onto the covers, his feet dangling off the edge of his bed that he’ll soon replace with another one, based upon your recommendation. He falls asleep that way - sleeps deeply, too, his hair wet and his towel coming undone after he shifts slightly in his slumber. It’s a deep sleep, one that doesn’t produce a memory of a dream, and Harry is thankful for that.

He doesn’t think he could take another night of dreaming of you.

Not if he wasn’t able to turn those dreams into a reality so that his mind could stop wandering day in and day out…

Not if he wasn’t able to get what he wanted…

Not if, he knows, he wasn’t able to make you his.