burger jesus

Broken - Part 1

2,500 Followers Drabble

Prompt: “What do you mean it broke?”

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Requested: @autopistaaningunaparte


If you literally died right in this glorious moment, you’d be totally and completely at peace with that. Still barely able to form a sentence, you’re coming down from the most mind blowing orgasm you’ve ever experienced.

But as your past wonderfully dictates, you should know by now that a good thing never ever fucking lasts.

“No no no.” The alarmed tone of Jensen’s voice immediately yanks you out of the blissful daze you’re lost in.

“What?”

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Again?

Pairing: Peter Maximoff x Reader

Warnings: None! Just fluff and a little saucy smoochin’.

A/N: Hey? i know it’s been a while but here i am and here this is. I’m sorry if it’s bad, I’ve just had some awful writer’s block and school has been a pain in my ass. Hopefully I’ll get back in the rhythm of things soon. But in the meantime, here you go!

Originally posted by aestheticallytate

His platinum locks fell over his eyes as his chest rose and fell steadily. The chatter of the television seemed distant as you lay next to him, your head on shoulder, his muscular arms around your waist, pulling you closer to his warm body. You sighed contentedly, snuggling closer to him, the soft material of the couch beneath you more inviting than ever. Glancing up at his face once again, you resisted the urge to capture his lips between yours. You couldn’t, he was your best friend and he surely didn’t like you like that, he’d never. Not someone like you. He deserved better. You swallowed, unaware of Peter’s dark eyes fluttering open.

“Hey, you checkin’ me out?

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So when I was first watching Netflix’s A Series of Unfortunate Events, I decided that Larry was an unsung hero, rarely mentioned in the fandom still to this day (I believe), who managed to help the Baudelaires escape despite being held hostage himself.

And then I watched it a second time and saw that he wasn’t wearing gloves while he was making the Baudelaire burgers.  Like JESUS CHRIST LARRY THAT’S A HEALTH CODE VIOLATION.  IF OLAF DOESN’T KILL THE KIDS YOUR FILTHY PLAGUE HANDS WILL.

Bucky² (Part 10)

Summary: You’re a mutant with the power of dimensional, spatial and time manipulation, meaning you can travel to and from dimensions, spaces and different times with ease. But one day, when you’re coming back from a particularly long mission, you brought something back that should never have come with you in the first place.

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything that Marvel has created and I certainly don’t own Sebastian Stan.

Warnings: Smut implied! Also McDonald’s is featured in this part so if you’re vegan or vegetarian, sorry.

40′s!Bucky x Present!Bucky x Reader


Originally posted by our-sizzling-seduction

A month passed, with great improvement.

Y/N was able to be to now hold a conversation with Bucky, though the majority of their conversations were in her room, considering she was nearly always nursing an electromagnetic headache with Bucky by her side.

Most of her days were spent, having breakfast, then back to the lab, working through the simulations, have a snack, back to the lab, have dinner and go to bed, speak with Bucky and fall asleep with him beside her. 

Things were starting to look up for them.

Y/N’s filmy E/C eyes slowly opened, to see Bucky laying beside her, his robotic fingers cold against her cheek, but her own hand, warm from the covers and her own body heat rested against the cool metal. “Hi, Happy Feet.”

Bucky grinned at her affectionate term for him, glad she was using it again, as he intertwined their vastly different fingers together. Mechanical on human, skin on metal. bone on wires, “how are you feeling, today, doll?” His voice was husky and warm, baby-blue eyes crinkled with his smile.

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anonymous asked:

My nease calls you burger Jesus,don't know why,but its funny😂

I am a religion now, I bless your niece with Holy Cheese. Now allow me to make holy water, just burning the hell out of water XD (I’ll show myself out)

2

I foolishly go into new places with this stupid idea that I’ve pretty much seen it all. Last night, I discovered that I really haven’t seen it all and that apparently, there is a McDonald’s in this world that literally has golden arches.

This is the fancy McDonald’s, which can be found within the vicinity of the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, North Carolina. I was always told that it existed, but I never believed it for a moment. I had watched a special on the Travel Channel once that talked about unique McDonald’s across the county. This particular one was featured and was called, “the classiest McDonald’s around”. Indeed, it was true.

I had no idea what to think about it. The fact that it is nicer than the nicest restaurant in my hometown of Madisonville can really tell you something. There was also a fancy Hardee’s up the road from there.

Pregnancy Series: Part 7: Mood Swings

Luke:
“Lu, can you get me an apple and water?”
“Luke, can you get me the blanket from upstairs?”
“Luke can you grab me a burger?”
“Luke….”


“JESUS Y/N, I’m your boyfriend, not a slave!” He screamed before slamming the door of your shared bedroom.  You were currently at the living room, living life, while bossing around Luke and you honestly felt bad so you went to where Luke was and hugged him from behind. “I’m sorry baby, I didn’t mean to boss you around.”

He turned around and hugged. “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have screamed at you.”

“No, it’s my fault, if I was in your place, I’d be mad too.”

“But you’re pregnant, and I should be taking care of you.”

You quickly kissed him.

“Well that’s the kiss that just fixes everything.”

Calum:
“CAAAAALLLLUUUUUM!“You yelled while crying.

"Babe? What’s wrong? Why are your crying?”

You were standing in front of the mirror and you faced him. “I look fat!” You said before crying again. Calum walked closer and pulled you into a hug.

“No you don’t!”

“Stop lying Cal! Look at me! I look like a whale!”

“No you don’t! Plus baby it’s normal, you’re pregnant!”

“But I didn’t look this fat, when I was pregnant with Lance!”

“Baby, you’re still beautiful okay? And the fact that you’re carrying a human being inside you gives you extra points.” You chuckled. “So don’t cry now.” He said before kissing your forehead.

Michael:
“Michael! You left the dishes on the sink again! Why didn’t you just put them on the dishwasher?”

No response.

“MICHAEL! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME! Michael!!! Get your ass here now!”

Still no response. So you decided to go to his bedroom which you’re actually not allowed into but you were pissed. You immediately stopped when you spotted a picture placed on his bedside table. It was a picture of you and Michael from when you attended your cousin’s wedding. You picked it up and stared at it. You always said to him how that was your favorite picture of the two of you. Michael was wearing a suit and you were wearing a blue dress and you were looking at each other and you two just looked so happy. Funny how one picture can take back so many memories.

“Y/N! I TOLD YOU TO NOT GO IN HERE!”

You turned around and he saw you still holding the frame so you placed it back where it belongs.

“Is that why I wasn’t allowed in here?” You asked. But he didn’t say anything. “Okay? You don’t wanna talk? I’ll just leave it then.” You tried to leave the room but Michael stopped you.

“Okay. Yes. It was.”

“Then why do you still have that?”

“Because…. it’s because when I found out that we’re gonna have a baby, I freaked out because god knows how hard I tried to get over you.” Your mouth fell open and tears were about to fall from eyes. “And when you showed me that sonogram picture, all of it just came back. All of it. And from that moment, I knew, I wanna be part of your life again.”

Ashton:
Ashton has to go back to the studio again for writing sessions for their new album. And you were quite grumpy because he’s always outside but you understood that it’s his job and he has to do it.

“Baby, can you stop being upset, so I can go.”

“Then I’ll just be grumpy all day so you won’t have to leave.”

“C'mon babe, okay, I promise next week, I won’t have to work all week. Just you and me.”

“Awww really?” You were so excited.

“Yes.”

“Okay, you can go now. Love you!"Ashton planted a kiss on your cheek and was got inside his car, he was about to leave when he noticed how grumy  you looked again so he got out.

"What is it this time?"He asked.

"You didn’t say I love you back.” You whispered.

He just laughed but you glared at him, he then pulled you into a hug. “It’s funny how your mood changes from 0 to 100 then back to 0 again. I love you Y/N. Very much.”

michael’s parts are always longer or smthng hehe.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to this WOMAN WHO IS ONE OF THE FIRST PEOPLE I’VE MET ON THIS CRAZY SITE AND THE REASON I’M OBSESSED WITH DESCENDANTS AND THOMAS DOHERTY AND IS ONE OF THE BEST WRITERS EVER AND JESUS CHRIST I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH OMG IF Y’ALL AREN’T FOLLOWING HER YOU PROBABLY SHOULD  @onceuponagladerhead @onceuponagladerheadprimary @noah-tate @harryohook @dani-and-her-camera @harriets-hook @beanies-and-burgers HOLY JESUS I LOVE YOU RUTH