burger gun

kahuna-burger  asked:

Hey, since you have trouble touching people without stabbing them, but like cuddling pets, have you considered trying to hug T'Challa? Or possibly getting Tony to put on cat ears?

you have a serious flaw in your logic. 

tchalla is a cat-man who has repeatedly tried to claw my face off. it was freakin traumatizing. you think a normal cat that doesnt wanna be petted is bad, try getting handsy with tchalla.

not that ive gotten handsy with tchalla. i like my face attached to my person, thank you very much.

tony put on cat ears a few months ago in a fit of confused sleep deprivation. the picture circulated through avengers-related group chats for weeks. nick fury called it, and i quote, ‘fucking adorable.’ tony is sometimes a no-toucher too though, so mostly we let him initiate contract when he wants to. so no, i did not hug tony when he was wearing cat ears. 

steve did have to carry him to bed though. and that picture circulated for months

  • Girl Gamer: I got the ammo already, lets-
  • Boy Gamer: Are you a chick?
  • Girl Gamer: Yes, but let's not-
  • Boy Gamer: GET BACK INTO THE KITCHEN AND MAKE ME A SANDWICH BITCH.
  • Girl Gamer: ...Oh, so we are going by those standards? Alright then, since you're a man, GET BACK INTO THE GARAGE AND FIX MY CAR, YOU BASTARD.
  • Boy Gamer: I'm not-
  • Girl Gamer: Oh Wait, Video games are supposed to be just for little kids, so I guess your not really a man, so GET BACK TO SCHOOL AND GET YOUR BOOK LEARNING'S YOU LITTLE BASTARD.
  • Boy Gamer: I'm in High-
  • Girl Gamer: Are you an American? GO GRILL ME UP SOME BURGERS, AND FIGHT FOR GUN RIGHTS WHILE STRUGGLING WITH TYPE 2 DIABETUS, YOU FUCKING REPUBLICAN FAT PIECE OF SHIT.
  • Boy Gamer: -has dropped out of the game.-

Meet the Former Drug-Dealing Gangster Turning Kids Away from Extremism

For a minute or two after getting into Tanayah Sam’s car, I wonder if I’m mistaken about the former leading member of Birmingham’s notorious Burger Bar Boys gang. An imam is angrily denouncing Charlie Hebdo’s pictures of the Prophet Mohammed over the stereo, and the noise overwhelms our initial introduction. On the way to our meeting, the day’s newspaper headlines had imposed themselves upon me: Jihadi John had been identified as 27-year-old Londoner Mohammed Emwazi.

In the current climate, significant points in Tanayah’s past could be read as a checklist on the road toward dangerous radicalization: a gun-toting, drug-dealing outlaw jumps bail while awaiting trial for armed robbery, devotes himself to Islam and ends up in Yemen, well known as the home of a number of jihadist training grounds. When he was finally caught in Birmingham four years later and given a nine-year sentence, Tanayah was labeled an “Islamic gang leader” and moved around 11 different prisons.

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