Context: My players fell into a giant bunny hole. They found human skeletons and one of my players used giant rabbit fur to tie together a human skeleton. They then found 3 giant bunnies trying to cook their friend into stew. Our bard was able to persuade 2 of the bunnies into being his friend (he named them Toaster and Freezer), he then proceeded to ride Toaster like a horse. The third bunny was killed by our barbarian. Once they are leaving they all hop onto the bunnies backs and these quotes happened:
“I pat the skeleton’s cheeks, wait! Can I put berries on the skeletons cheeks so they has rosy cheeks? Their name is Rosie now.”
“As we are on the bunny, I wrap the skeleton’s arms around my waist, I start singing ’"I can show you the world…”’
I recently got sucked into the black hole that is LOTR and am in desperate need of Legolas fics (I mean, who can resist pretty elf princes?). Literally anything is fine, but it would be great if it could be fluff. Or a crackfic.
You mumbled some not so nice words at the overhanging tree branch, swatting it from your face.
You continued walking only to nearly trip over a root in your way.
You jumped back, coincidentally right into a web and sighed angrily, shaking and trying to dislodge the silky, sticky entrails from your hair. When you looked up again a certain elf was observing you.
“What?” you said. Before you could say anything else you nearly jumped out of your skin in fright when you realized a vine was wrapped around your arm.
“Nothing,” Legolas replied. His blank expression did not change but there was a certain twinkle in his eyes that betrayed his thoughts.
“Yeah, yeah, ha ha,” You muttered, untangling yourself. “It is not my fault that nature hates me.”
“Nature does not hate you,” Legolas said, maneuvering his way through the forest as you struggled to keep up with his long strides. “You merely do not know how to properly co-exist with it. This is why it battles you.”
“So you’re telling me it is purposely messing with me?” You narrowed your eyes. Legolas sighed.
“You need to learn how to be one with your surroundings.”
“Well then teach me, oh so wise one,” You drawled, not having his mojo jojo.
Legolas glanced back at you. “First of all, attacking everything in sight will not help.”
You looked at your hand that had pieces of torn leaves that you’d ripped when you pushed the vine away from you and dropped them onto the ground sheepishly.
“Secondly, please do not frighten off the wildlife. They can hear you coming a mile away, what with your footsteps.”
“What’s wrong with my footsteps?” You asked indignantly.
The corner of his lip tugged up slightly. “You sound as if you are a herd of stags stamping through.”
You gaped at him, appalled at the insult. “Excuse me?” Legolas himself seemed to not make a blip of noise as he walked, almost as if he were gliding along the ground. Well it wasn’t your fault you were not a mystical elf now was it?
“You are excused,” He hummed. “Lesson number three, you need to listen to nature.”
At that he stopped entirely, and you almost ran right into his back. You spluttered, trying to balance yourself.
“Don’t just stop-”
He turned around so that he was looking at you and smiled. “Sit.”
You opened your mouth to argue but his smile intensified threateningly and you found yourself sitting.
Legolas folded his legs in and you replicated the action, growing suspicious when he placed his hands lightly on his knees. His bow and pack of arrows stayed in their position strung over his back, showing you just how ready he was at all times for a battle.
“Close your eyes,” He said.
“Don’t we have more important things to do-”
“This is important. Now close your eyes.”
You wanted to say that your appointment and reason for this journey was more important but you kept your lips shut. The world shut off to darkness as you closed your eyelids.
“Patience,” he said with a tilt of amusement in his voice that made you even more agitated. “What can you hear?”
What. “I don’t hear-”
You pinched your side to calm yourself and attempted to hear something, anything to get him off your case.
“Fine. I hear uh, a mosquito. Also I think there is a stream somewhere nearby.”
“An orc has better senses than you, anyone could tell that. Try harder.”
You bit your tongue to prevent yourself from lashing out. You considered running but knew you wouldn’t get very far comparing your speed to his.
“Don’t just listen with your ears, listen with everything.”
Fine, you thought. Might as well.
So you waited. And waited.
You sat there for about five minutes without hearing anything and was about to give up when something whispered in your ear. It was the wind, blowing through your hair and curving round your body.
And just like that it seemed everywhere came alive. Slowly the stream nearby picked up in frequency, and you could hear the water rushing over stones, splashing the soil. A bunny scurried into a hole off to your left, debris and dead leaves crunching underneath its feet.
You had been too annoyed earlier to register the smell of the forest but now that you weren’t occupied it assaulted you. Fresh ozone, stinging pine, an earthy, dusty aroma filling your nose. It was so potent you could taste it on your tongue and at the back of your throat.
A hawk cried somewhere off in the distance. More creatures hurried along in the background. A trail of ants, the slow slithering of the belly of a snake, a cooing from a bird to your right, and the response from another bird up ahead. The leaves of the trees overhead rustled in the wind and you could feel the forest floor beneath you, hard from the countless travelers that had trekked its path before, but slightly damp from rain that had fallen two days prior.
Without thinking your body let go tension and you heard even your own inner workings. You registered your breathing, chest moving up and down as air went out of you, mingling with the forest air that you drew back in. Your heart thudded inside you, the rhythm coinciding with the drip of a moist leaf far off.
Your hands moved from your lap, burying themselves into the dirt around you limply, feeling it against your skin and clumping underneath your nails.
And somehow, you made the vague thought that you really were one with nature.
You didn’t know how long you had been in that state. Then you were being shaken gently, shattering your calm.
The first thing you saw when you reopened your eyes was blue. A sea of clear sky that had you drowning in their depths. It was only when you blinked you saw that you were really only looking into Legolas’ eyes.
You got to your feet, jerking away from him. It surprised you when your legs turned to jelly. You would have fallen if not for the tall elf who had supported your weight, already up.
It felt as if you had just come out of a deep slumber. “W-what? I-” Even your voice sounded raspy.
“And that,” Legolas began and you saw all at once how close you were to him, your palms squeezing his arms for support and your head on his chest. You flushed when he spoke, his chest rumbling as he did. “-is what it is to listen to nature.”
You managed to regain your balance and let go of him, but he did not make an effort to put more distance between the two of you.
“Is that what you elves hear all the time?” You asked. Now that you weren’t listening, the woods had gone back to how you had perceived them at first, and you couldn’t get back those feelings you had.
Legolas only gave you a close eyed smile.
“No wonder you all are like that,” You mumbled. It was like they were on drugs 24/7.
“I will take that as a compliment,” He raised an eyebrow.
“If you want,” you replied, now completely back to normal and smirked up at him.
Legolas closed the small space between you suddenly, making it nonexistent. You had no time to react when he spoke, now so close you could feel his lips brushing your ear.
“You have no idea what I want, Y/N.”
A rush of sparks tingled down your spine, blood hot underneath your cheeks. You were sure you were a statue when Legolas moved away and began walking yet again.
He was already a far ways ahead when his voice drifted back to you.
“I would advise you to make haste. After all we have important places to be.”
I like the fact you used the actual science of black holes to create Abbadons weakness! It was very clever+
I’m a huge astronomy nerd, I had to do my research! Besides time magic he’s weak to platinum, it’s an absolutely pure metal and one of the few things that can pierce his skin…usually though it makes him feel disoriented:
Diamonds also do the trick against him, he always tells Lola if they ever get married he’d have to get creative with rings
THE PRO. Seokjin looks great for sales and is perfect with the camera. But when the camera is off, so is he. He works hard and you can tell because of how known he is. He’s a pro, the pro. Probably costs like half the production costs and always has someone just off set to bring him water when the camera cuts.
THE PRO/THROW. He’s obviously doing a great job, I mean the market blooms around him. Yet when the cameras are off he goes into deep thought as to how he became a porn star and isn’t the happiest with his body. He can be a bit of a buzz kill back stage but when they start rolling again everyone’s turned on.
THE AU/PRO. You’re not getting anything vanilla with Hoseok. You have to offer him something crazy for him to agree to the flick. Anything mildly “out of this world” so to say is perfect for him. You will honestly not find someone better to work with. Biker/Car Sex/Bathing/Neck Play are his specialities.
THE REAL LIFE PRO. He’s the guy you call Daddy off set. He plays his roles as if they’re his life and he plays them sooo good. Always ready for more or to keep going because it takes him no time to get into character. The director has to call break so everyone can just breathe!
THE HO. Straight up a hoe and has no intention of hiding it. He will flirt with everyone and thing on set or off. They love to play with their co stars and staff members. Always turned on and ready to go. Sees everything in life as a preface to a sex scene and always has sex written in his eyes.
THE FUN HOE. Taehyung is the guy that you have to redo the scene with because you ended up laughing. Or in a scene where he’s supposed to whisper something dirty to you he tells you a joke about a seahorse in space. Taehyung messes with people off set but is always ready to take someone against a wall and won’t mind doing it.
THE PLAYBOY BUNNY. It may sound like I made this up just for him, but no. Jungkook is perfect on set, when the cameras are rolling he’s truly showing just how he got the name “Golden Maknae” but when the cameras go off he’s gone. You can’t find him anywhere but his Bunny Hole and he’ll only come out when it’s time fuck or go home.
Write like you have nothing better to do. Write like a walrus is following you and wants to steal your overcoat. Write like you just sat down on a language bush and are trying to find the best way to ask someone to remove words from your buttocks with a colossal pair of tweezers. On rainy days, write like you have eaten too many beans and are trying to find a quiet portaloo. Write like the ink is rising and you do not have a snorkel. Only write! Write like your pen is a grumpy stallion. Write with heredity and purulence. Write like one of your bunny slippers has a hole in it and little bits of slipper stuff are coming out. Write like you’ve just swallowed a duck. Write like your aunt drove you to the supermarket of writing in a Ford Fiesta that smelled of sardines and always came to pick you up later at the end of your shift with her knitting. Write like your elbows would write, if they had fingers. Write like an accordion. Write stripily. And in the reaches of the night, in those desolate lonely watches when your thoughts wash up over and over and over and over and over on useless shores, ask yourself, must I write? And realise that you must, because in the reaches of the night it is really cold and if you don’t then that fucking walrus will steal your coat.
Brought about by asuggestion from @yourtropegirl, regarding: Shopping for a birthday present for Mami with your Papi, ADA Rafael Barba.
HUGE AMAZING THANK YOU TO @controllingkittens for all your amazing help with the Spanish in this, I sincerely appreciate it more than you probably know. :).
“But Papi,” he had specifically told you this was a ‘secret adventure’, which for some reason absolutely terrified you; “Papi, Mami finds out EVERYTHING.” You knew this, she had told you so many times before, and unless Teddy was a snitch- she wasn’t lying. Mami knew all, whether it was you climbing out of bed in the middle of the night or somehow figuring out that you had been the one to steal a fingertip of icing off a cupcake.
Rafael sighed, and shifted your weight so you’d fit better on his lap without bothering the woman sitting next to you two. This really was a lot for a little girl to take in, you didn’t feel quite prepared to be an accessory to this crime.
“Si, Princesa,” delicately, he fixed the hair tie that must have slipped if it warranted him to be tugging at your curls like that, “but I haven’t told you yet why we’re going on a secret trip.”
It could have turned out differently, I suppose (But it didn’t)
You know that pain and
guilt can’t be taken away with a wave of a magic wand. They’re the things we
carry with us, the things that make us who we are. If we lose them, we lose
ourselves. I don’t want my pain taken away! I need my pain! – James Tiberious
Felicity looked around the room at her friends, all in the
fetal position, crying. The meta human – “The Heartbreaker,” as Cisco dubbed
him, stepped over their bodies as he stalked toward Felicity.
“Choices. Human existence is made up of millions of choices.
Left or right. What college? Who to date? Fight or flight? And with those
choices comes another plague to humankind – regret. Did we make the right
choice? What would life be like if we had chosen differently?”
While he gave his villainy monologue (why did villains
always do that, she wondered), Felicity surveyed the room for an exit. Or some
way she could get ahold of Oliver.
“You humans are always at odds with yourself, and I simply
use that to my advantage,” Heartbreaker said as he stopped a few feet from her.
The rug is getting faded these days but it’s still good.
Renovated the bun pen!
They have water, two litter trays, living works puzzle toy, some ramps, grass ball (attached to the left because dusty hogs all the greens so hops doesn’t get any. This is out of dwarf reach), pent house (goes very cool in summer when a frozen bottle added), wooden tunnel, a box, some toys and a bit of binky space.
Opens up to give whole room access when supervised. Access to the room is via a child auto closing safety system and two doors because dog.