bullshit test

Things Ravenclaws Say #19
  • Ravenclaw: So, how do you think finals will go?
  • Slytherin: Well. I studied all last night
  • Gryffindor: Same
  • Hufflepuff: I've studied all month
  • Slytherin: How about you?
  • Ravenclaw: Oh no. I don't study
  • Gryffindor: What?
  • Ravenclaw: I just bullshit my way through tests. Finals included
  • Ravenclaw: *laughs nervously*
Tips for Studying History!

I don’t see a lot of posts about how to effectively study for history classes, so I’m going to give it a shot! Warning: long post coming up!

  • Practice identifying the significance of something. The entire point of history is to learn the significance of different events and people. I guarantee that at some point you will be asked to state the significance, which is where this comes in handy. Also, knowing how to do this will vastly improve your essays.
  • Use timelines. Even if your teacher doesn’t make it mandatory to know dates, you should understand the order that major events happen. I will either write out a timeline or order my cue cards in the order they belong in after studying. Also, if your teacher does mark dates, you can at least be sure you know the decade it happened in even if you don’t know the full year.
  • Write extremely thorough notes. In some classes, like math, if you get something really well, you can kind of relax on the depth of your notes. I do not recommend this in history! Write down everything that seems important: names, dates, symbols, fun facts. The more you know, the easier it is to get full marks on a test without bullshitting.
  • Don’t rely on crash courses or internet research while studying. Your teacher taught you what they want you to know. While watching a crash course video might  be a good way to start preparing for a course while on summer vacation, it is not an effective way to study for a test. The information in the video is not what you were taught in class, so it won’t be that helpful. Internet research is the same – you can easily find dates and locations, but the specific information taught in class can only be found in your personal notes.
  • Talk to people in the class. Some things in history are open to interpretation. A good way to get lots of opinions and viewpoints on a certain subject is to hold a study group and discuss the material. You guys can also help each other remember small details from the notes. Certain things will just stick in your brain while others won’t, so reviewing the notes with other students is a really good way to make sure you aren’t missing anything.
  • Write essay outlines. In a history class, you will probably be writing a lot of essays. So many of my friends have massive problems with history essays because they don’t organize them prior to writing. If you just start talking about an event and don’t know where to go next, you’re going to have a total trainwreck. Organize your thoughts!! Plan what you are going to write!! It doesn’t take that long and it will save your life every time you write an essay.
  • Read “Politics and the English Langauge” by George Orwell.
  • Learn how to write footnotes manually. Writing footnotes and formatting your paper yourself isn’t that hard to do. It will help you out a lot when Word isn’t working or something goes wrong with the formatting feature.
  • Be an expert during presentations. If you are doing a presentation, be an absolute expert in the topic. Try not to read from any notes and be sure that you can answer any questions the class or teacher might have. Presentations are a good way to boost your mark, so try and be super knowledgeable and impress your teacher.
  • Learn how to write a thesis. If you’re writing an essay, your thesis should be clear. In high school, you can usually figure out what your thesis should be by figuring out what the main question you’re trying to answer is, then answering it. Make sure that your answer is focusing on just one viewpoint, not somewhere in the middle. And, ask a teacher or friend to look at your thesis before you start writing!

This is all I can think of for the time being, but I might add more later. Or message me if you have other ideas you think I should add to my list!

Submitted by violetparadigm

you generously gave me one of your prompts and here is the result ft. jack as an adopted child of medda larkin, the greatest, our hero,

Jack’s never been good at science. Which works out well, actually, because it’s Davey’s favorite and strongest subject.

That is, he usually manages to scrape by with Bs and the occasional C, and he gets a decent grade. Asking for help isn’t exactly something Jack’s good at, or that he enjoys doing. Still, his bio final is on Monday, and to say he’ll pass is a vast overstatement of his abilities. Sure, he’s proficient at bullshitting tests and quizzes, but final exams are the real thing.

Jack caves.

“Of course!” Davey says, probably smiling through the phone. “When?”

So Davey shows up at the Larkin household at four-thirty on Saturday.

Keep reading


i blocked your snapchat and you blocked my number. i guess that’s how things go, yeah?

we’ve been on so many adventures together - first love, first dance, first heartbreak. for god’s sake, we traveled across an ocean with each other. i knew your favorite song by heart and the fact that you don’t dream at night, that you’ve always wanted a surprise party for your birthday and the way you smile when you’re sad. 


you hate me now. maybe it’s just easier for you to picture me as the villain, the reason your issues exist. it’s all my fault. does that make you feel better about ruining me? does it help you sleep at night to imagine the girl you broke as the bad guy?

you know, k, i really should hate you. ever since last year, all you’ve done is let me down. hell, you’ve broken my heart twice now, and people start wars over that shit. it’s not fun. it hurts.

i don’t, though. i love you, because once upon a time, you were my best friend. you became friends with the new girl with glasses when nobody else was interested. i texted my best friend from back home, told her about the most adorable boy. you were sitting next to me and found a blue crayon and gave it to me and that was the start. i still have it.

i suppose it’s unfair to put all the blame on you. sure, it was my fault, too. the difference was that i wanted to work harder, i tried to fix us. you gave up and it hurt so much that i cried every night for months because my lungs were too tight for me to breathe.

but you found a girlfriend. she’s lovely. blonde hair, blue eyes, smart, a writer… huh. it would appear that you have a type.

funny thing is she thought you still had a crush on me. that’s what h said, anyway, and your girlfriend definitely suspected that i still had feelings for you, because she asked me. i told her that i would always still feel something for you because you were my first boyfriend. she understood and that was that.

i wonder, though… when i first saw - ahem - voldemort, i thought he was you. people said you two looked alike. no wonder i ended up dating him, right? maybe it’s the same for you. do you miss me? is she the rebound?

no. she’s not. this little dream i have is exactly that: a dream. you hate me now.

you blocked my number. i blocked you right back.

god, i miss you. i want you to be happy, even if i end up as collateral damage, because i just love you so fucking much. it hurts when i think about you kissing her, but then i remember you’re happier now.

what’s that saying? if you love someone, let them go. if they return, they were always yours. if they don’t, they never were.

the one thing they left out of that saying is that letting go of someone you love is pretty fucking difficult, especially when you realize they might not return.

a brief side note - p, if you find this, i’m sorry. i’m trying to leave him alone, to stop missing him, but you know what those damn eyes can do to a person. you’re such a lovely girl, and i know you won’t let him pull any bullshit with you. he’ll test your patience and hurt you when he doesn’t mean to, but he’s worth it. i hope you guys are happy together.

and to k - i mean it when i say that i love you.

-d.c. girl

p.s. you swear now, your favorite song isn’t i’m yours anymore, and you forgot mine (it’s drops of jupiter, by the way). please don’t become someone you’re not.

oh, and don’t forget her birthday.

Murderous Meme-age
  • *Fan and Test Tube are carrying Lightbulb, she has a giant crack down the center of her form, starting in between her eyes*
  • Paintbrush: *facepalms* Oh my gooood, what happened now?
  • Test Tube: She cracked herself dabbing.
  • Fan: *nods*
  • Paintbrush: Dabbing????
  • Fan: She was trying to do a reverse-360 dab off of a tabletop....it failed.
  • Paintbrush: You got anything to say for yourself, "Dab Master"?
  • Lightbulb: Dab life is dangerous....Only you can prevent dabtastrophe-
  • Paintbrush: Lightbulb, this isn't a commercial, you cracked your face!
  • Lightbulb: It was worth it...I looked so cool.
  • Paintbrush: Both of you, tie her arms together, she is banned from dabbing now.

we had to take a personality test for work and my results were hilariously redundant

TOP 5 STRENGTHS (minus the I’m-sure-proprietary-names)

1) craving to know more; likes to collect and archive information

2) good at spotting patterns, issues, and alternative ways to proceed

3) desires to learn and continuously improve

4) fascinated by ideas, finding connections and patterns

5) characterized by intellectual activity; introspective

what is ESPECIALLY hilarious is that my employer definitely paid for this test but you can figure out these strengths (are they different strengths?? aren’t they really like the same two strengths over and over again?) by talking to me for five minutes

anonymous asked:

Fenhawke, either 2 or 19 (or both!) ☺️

(hope you don’t mind a bit of teenagers AU)

“If you keep that up I will fail this exam,”

Hawke grumbled against Fenris’s neck, arms tightly wound around his waist as he peppered his skin with tiny kisses.

“I’ll help you study later,” he replied, unwilling to part from his boyfriend. With exam season coming up, it felt like Fenris was always studying. Day in, day out. While he understood that not everyone could bullshit their way through test papers like he could, he thought Fenris deserved a break. Preferably, one that ended up with them fucking like rabbits on the sofa. However, beggars can’t be choosers.

He snaked his hand around to tilt Fenris’s chin towards him. His dark eyebrows furrowed, lips pressed tightly together, and shoulders bunched. The stress was getting to him. Before he could protest, Hawke kissed him gently. Fenris melted into the embrace and dropped his pen, allowing his mouth to open and their lips to work together in tandem. Hawke tucked a strand of white hair behind Fenris’s ear and pulled him closer.

“Fine,” Fenris breathed between kisses.

A grin grew on Hawke’s face and Fenris turned to nestle between his legs so they were facing each other. Their lips met again, Hawke’s teeth nibbling at Fenris’s bottom lip. His fingers rubbed small circles into the small of his back. It only spurred Fenris on, sliding his hands up Hawke’s chest.

When he groped at his thigh, Fenris groaned and Hawke shuddered at the sound. He kissed at his lips, his chin, his jaw. Soon enough his lips re-found his neck, delighting in the way it made Fenris’s breath hitch. He was so sensitive there.

“Your family isn’t home?” Fenris asked suddenly. Hawke shook his head and met Fenris’s gaze. Fenris squirmed out of his hold and stood up, dragging Hawke up onto his feet with him. “Upstairs,”

His tone was sultry and made the blood rush below Hawke’s waist as Fenris guided him up the stairs. Before they could reach the room, Hawke grabbed him and drew him in for another kiss. Their bodies stumbled in through the doorway and into the room until the back of Fenris’s knees hit the bed post and they tumbled in a heap. They laughed softly as the breath was stolen out of Fenris’s lungs at the onset of weight as Hawke fell on top of him.

Hawke grinned down at him.

“This is much better than studying,” he said, peppering Fenris’s face with more kisses. Fenris’s chuckle rumbled against his chest.

“For once I agree,”

Hi so okay me and @mango-strings saw this post circulating around and are really not fucking okay with this.

“how the fuck is china on here, ???, the future of a high school student depends entirely on an exam at the end of high school, and you can’t retake it or anything if you get a stomachache/smt then you’re fucked, chinese students get a fuckton of homework too, the american education system is a piece of cake compared to the chinese system.” - mango-strings

To clarify, we are absolutely pissed off that China is even considered to be put on this list. There is a exam at the end of high school called 高考 (essentially ‘high/big test’)  and it’s the worst nightmare of every Chinese student. It is almost like the SAT/ACT but a lot fucking harder because

1. can’t retake it. ever.
2. your parents pressure you so fucking much

There is a tradition that when there is a huge exam, their parents would boil them two eggs and lay them out as such so that the chopsticks and the eggs make ‘100′ as in “get full marks and the only reason we’re being nice is so that you get full marks and if you don’t we’ll be disappointed and hurt b/c we used all this effort”. Yeah. Happened to my mother and my aunts. And older cousins.

What’s more, my older cousin (in GuangZhou) is in her late teens and recently took that exam. She didn’t do so well. And my entire family on that side treats it as taboo. Whenever we bring up her or her academics a deadly atmosphere of tension just fucking encompasses the room.

My Mandarin Chinese teacher (she grew up in Shanghai) told us stories about how aloof her father was until the week of that exam and he suddenly turned loving and made her a good breakfast each morning. Just because of that exam.

And oh boy it doesn’t just start in high school. I went to a public school while in Hong Kong for my primary years (G1-6). In my first year I was told I was falling behind in math. So my parents enrolled me in Kumon. Kumon is a extra learning centre where kids go and have methods drilled in their heads mostly with math with 6 10 page pieces of homework you were supposed to complete 1 every day and go to the centre on one day. I had to go for EXTRA tuition in FIRST GRADE even though I got 90s on my tests because apparently that’s bad. I kept going to Kumon until I was mid way through 7th grade.

I remember sobbing the whole way home because I got a 81 on a Chinese Reading test. I remember having to sit down in an EXTRA meeting with my math teacher and parents because I got a 79 on my math test and I had tears streaming down my face the whole time and they told me they expected the two numbers to be flipped next time. The only time I was praised for my grades was when I got a 99% on my math exam. There’s a test you have to take in grade 6 that determines your high school acceptances. Yeah that’s right. I said high school acceptances. Because guess what bitches, we can’t just get into any public high school. There are tests you take to see which caste of school you can get in to. My parents transferred me out of public school before 6th grade though I stayed friends with the people in my primary school and there are horrors. My then 6th grade best friend slept at 2am crying over her work. At that time she had no possible distractions whatsoever. TV outside, phone outside, no laptop, books in the far corner. Meaning she had actual homework for roughly six hours including time for shower/bathroom and dinner. AT 6TH GRADE.

That was in GRADE 1 TO GRADE 6. In HONG KONG. I emphasis on HONG KONG because Hong Kong has a lighter education system than mainland China.

I could go on and on about how horrible the Chinese education system is but I think you’ve had enough. Honestly we could make post after post that could just be long rants about each subject addressed. No homework in China? Bullshit. No standardised tests? Bullshit. Paying teachers well? Lmao bullshit. 

tl;dr: China has absolutely no right to be up on that list

anonymous asked:

annabeth/percy, parent and teacher au

Annabeth was, frankly, a little surprised to see that Mr Jackson had made it on time. While he was always punctual on the irregular days he picked up his son, they were just that - irregular. And while there had been any number of opportunities for parents to get involved in school activities, she had only ever seen Ms Dare attend after the first day of class.

It was strange. If she’d had to predict which of the two parents would be more hands on with Morgan on that day, she would have said Percy Jackson. Looking at him now through the open door of her classroom, crouched in front of his son and chatting animatedly (complete with the same wide arm gestures that Morgan had accidentally hit more than one person in the face with), she would have said the same thing.

And yet. This was the first time she had seen him in three months, other than the irregular days he picked Morgan up at the gate. The boy spoke about his father (both his parents, actually) in glowing terms, but Annabeth had long held a sneaking suspicion that it was more a case of hero worship than a sign of any close bond between them.

“Please come in, Morgan, Mr Jackson,” she called. The man held up his hand to high-five his son, who whacked it.

Annabeth ducked her head, the moment tugging a reluctant smile out of her. She was met with the same hand that had been high-fived, Jackson holding his hand out to shake. Returning the gesture firmly, she was pleasantly surprised by his equally firm grip. Confident, but with none of the testing bullshit some men liked to pull.

She had wondered, with his easy grins, if Jackson might be one of those men. It was nice to be proven wrong, she thought dubiously. On occasion. Rare occasions.

“Percy’s fine,” he said amiably, taking the seat she gestured to. His hands twitched, like he wanted to pull Morgan up after him. But he didn’t, and the boy pulled himself up into his own seat with ease. There was a rueful touch to Jackson - Percy’s - lips as he glanced back over at Annabeth. “Hey, and I wanted to apologise for not being around and helping out in class more. So far these things have fallen either in the middle of my shifts, or the day after.”

“Sleep day.” Morgan nodded seriously, and Percy flushed a little.

“It’s not as lazy as it sounds, I swear. I don’t - did Rachel tell you what I do?”

Rachel hadn’t, and if it had come up in class from Morgan, Annabeth was embarrassed to find she didn’t remember. Doubly embarrassed that her irritated assessment of the man’s character were quickly proving even more wrong than she’d initially thought. Triply embarrassed, because he had a nice smile, and she wasn’t supposed to notice those things.

“No, but please, tell me. I’m always happy to learn more about my students’ families. It helps me give them more individualised attention.”

Something in the set of the man’s shoulders seemed to relax when she said that, and it was only then that Annabeth realised how tense he had been holding himself. One of his knees jogged up and down, although it didn’t seem like he’d realised what he was doing.

“Right. That’s good. And - I’m a firefighter. Twenty four hours on, forty eight off. Fires don’t exactly stick to the nine to five schedule.”

Great. Now she felt like a jerk, as well as an idiot. Wasn’t that a lesson she was supposed to be teaching her kids? Don’t judge a book by its cover. The man was performing a civil service, and here she’d been thinking that he was just playing cool dad and letting Rachel pick up the work.

“I can see how that would have its pros and cons,” she said, in lieu of incriminating herself. “But if you’d like to be more hands on, I’m sure we can work with your schedule in some way. We don’t exactly have such an abundance of parents willing to help out that I’d want to turn one away.”

“Really? That’d be fantastic. I feel like I’m missing out, you know? And I don’t want him to feel that way.”

The man’s whole face lit up when he was pleased. Annabeth was starting to realise that, while it hadn’t worked out in the marriage department, Rachel Elizabeth Dare had very good taste when it came to other aspects. Like the aforementioned face. Christ, that jaw looked like it was chiseled out of stone.

Morgan kicked his legs back and forth. “I don’t feel that way,” he announced, just to be reassuring. Annabeth suspected he didn’t have a clue what they were actually talking about. That was the kind of boy Morgan was.

Percy ruffled the boy’s head of copper curls, drawing a giggle from his son. And Annabeth couldn’t help but smile at that too. She’d only spent five minutes with the both of them, and it was already clear that, time concerns aside, Percy Jackson adored his son.

“Morgan has always been an empathetic student,” she said. “But more on that later. Before we get to the discussion part of the evening, I think Morgan has something to show you.”

It was a part of all the parent teacher interviews Annabeth. Students invariably worked harder if they thought there was a point to what they were doing, and most of them enjoyed the prospect of showing off to their parents. Morgan was no different, practically tripping over himself to retrieve the book he’d decided to read aloud that afternoon.

He was by no means a genius at reading. But he was dogged and persevered beyond what some children would consider good enough, and Annabeth estimated his ability to be no better or worse than the average five year old.

It clearly didn’t matter to his father. Looking at Percy Jackson, you would have thought he’d just successfully applied to an Ivy League. The glow of pride on his face made him look even more handsome, and something in Annabeth’s stomach flipped over.

Oh no, she thought to herself. Oh no, oh no, Annabeth Chase don’t you dare!

But it was no use. Percy Jackson left her classroom that night with his son and a progress report, and Annabeth left with a crush the size of Manhattan.