buisness in the front

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

~Five~

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Chris

Shit.

Out of all these girls, this white motherfucker decides to pair me up with the one that hates me no particular reason. How am I supposed to work with someone who always has a smart/rude ass comeback to everything?

I glanced back over at Karrueche as Mr. Walker continued down the list of groups. She was texting on her iPhone using the big nigga in front of her as a shield, while other people would use books, their desks, etc. I could sense she was fuming with anger by the way she was texting. She looked like she was ready to dropkick him and as her partner, I would assist her.

“Karrueche?” He called her as he stood up out of his seat to look over to see what she was doing.

“What?” She answered so bitterly it left a bad taste in my mouth.

“Are you on your phone?” Mr. Walker crossed his arms.

Caught.

“Yep.” She answered casually as if it wasn’t against the rules. I shook my head at her getting caught.

“Well put it away. Same for you, Christopher.” He made his thin round glasses meet the bridge of his nose as he looked at me.

Caught too.

I sucked my teeth sliding my iPhone in my pocket. How the fuck does she get caught and then I do?

Mr. Walker smirked picking up the Oceangraphy textbook. “Let me find out Chris and Karrueche were texting each other.”

Karrueche’s face scrunched up as if she smelled something bad and she coughed:

“Hell No!”

Our classmates began to laugh as Karrueche remained unfazed pulling out her phone like she didn’t just get caught three minutes ago. Sean, who was next to me, was chuckling at her outburst and nudged me pointing at Karrueche.

“Hey, you working with your ex-bitch too?”

I fell so back I almost fell out of my seat. “Nigga fuck nah. She wouldn’t even be my ex-bitch.”

When the last bell rang, Walker attempted to give us a homework assignment as all the Seniors rushed out of the door. He shrugged his shoulders leaving the assignment on his desk sighing. I placed my bag on my shoulder and made it out of the door where people were rushing to make the bus. I felt someone bump into me but before I could snap at them, a feminine voice spoke up.

“Oh I’m sorry, Chris.” Jasmine looked up at me smiling.

I smiled back. “It’s cool, baby girl.”

She navigated her hand on my chest rubbing it seductively and biting her bottom lip looking at me with lust in her ocean blue eyes. I bit my lip hard because no lie, I was turned on.

“So you wanna give me a ride home?”

I thought for a little bit then looked back at her. “Yes.”

“But just a ride home. No funny buisness, Brown.” She teased poking my chest.

I held my hands in defense chuckling. “I would never.”

***********

“Chris…” Jasmine moaned in my mouth and my tongue glided against hers. She kept forcing her tongue down my throat while pressing me more into the driver’s seat. I know I told her no funny buisness, but here we are, in my car, in front of her beige house making out. She finally came up for air and smiled at me.

“Thanks for the ride, Chrissy.” Jasmine wiped her lips and moved into the passenger seat taking her bag.

I wiped my lips out of breath. “See you around?”

Jasmine smirked seductively at me. “Yep.” With that, she opened the passenger door and got out. Jasmine was fine but I’m not trying to get into a relationship with her but I’m not trying to play her either. What am I trying to do? Shit, I already got to second base.

Sighing, I put my car in drive and drove to my house. Pulling into my driveway, I saw that Mama was home. I exited my car seeing Karrueche walking towards me with mail in her hands.

“Idiot mailman again.” She stated bitterly handing me the stack.

I laughed a little then looked at her. “So do you want to start on the project now or…?”

“No.” She deadpanned glaring at me then crossed her arms. “How about we meet up at the school library tomorrow after school?”

“Oooh!” I let out shaking my head in disapproval. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Baby girl, I don’t do libraries.” I answered crossing my arms also.

“I can tell.” Karrueche snorted and I glared at her.

“Well you better start doing them now because if I fail, it’s your ass, Brown.” She spat sticking a finger in my face but it was hard to take her seriously due to her being a foot shorter then me. I let out a little chuckle.

“Fine. Anything for you.”

She squinted then rolled her eyes making her way out of my driveway. She’ll be aight.

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Karrueche

Good God! I fucking hate him! He’s worst than he was before because now not only is he an inconsiderate dipshit, he’s an arrogant, infuriating, inconsiderate dipshit. My mind was begging me to let Chris have it, but the price of doing that is revealing my identity.

I breathed in and out making it inside my house. I may hate Brown and everyone else, but let me try to get through senior year without killing someone.

The next morning, I unfortunately missed the bus. Again. As I walked to school, I made mental notes to myself to study for my permit. I walked inside the school and went straight to my locker. I felt an unwelcome presence and I closed my locker slightly to lay my eyes upon Chris who was dressed in a white t-shirt, gray sweats and Infared 3’s. No lie, Chris always looked fresh as hell. You know, for a complete dipshit.

“Can I help you?” I looked him up and down in annoyance placing a hand on my hip.

Chris made a face. “Damn no hi? Just a stank ass attitude to start the day?”

I looked him dead in the eyes cocking my head to the side. “Would you like a foot up your ass to start the day?”

Chris sucked his teeth then chuckled. “Well damn. You just made it easier to break the news to your ass.”

“What news?” I furrowed my eyebrows as I went back to my original task of piling books in and out of my locker. I already don’t like him and I’m not a morning person so bad combo.

“Well something came up so I’m gonna have to reschedule.” Chris stated scratching the back of his head and looking back briefly. I looked in his direction to see Jasmine standing a few feet away smiling at him. I felt something sharp pierce my heart. He’s ditching me for her. It hurt like hell knowing my best friend, well ex-best friend, was going out with my bully from middle school. He’s abandoning me. Again.

I glared at him when Chris looked back at me and spat with venom:

“Or some hoe came up.”

“Wha-”

“Fuck it. Go and do what you want, Chris.” I slammed my locker shut loudly making a few people look at us and placed my bag on my shoulder storming away.

It ain’t the first time you fucked me over.

When school was out, I made my way towards the library. I peeped Chris and Jasmine which made me roll my eyes and continued inside. I went up the desk signing in my name and the time.

“You can take computer 27.” The middle aged librarian pointed towards the computer area. I nodded at her and walking over the black LCD screen computer labeled 27. I waved the mouse and a blue screen popped up with two tabs to enter my username and password. I typed in my ID number as username, my birthdate as password, and clicked the enter key.

“Hi Karrueche.” I looked up to the attractive dark skinned guy on my right. I inwardly scoffed. Trey. What the fuck do he want? I rolled my eyes and began searching in my bag for my grey binder.

“Or should I call you Kangaroo?”

I froze in the middle of removing my binder from the bag. Oh no he didn’t. I slammed my binder on my face facing him.

“What the fuck did you just call me?” I spat too loudly and looked ahead to see the librarian nowhere in sight so I returned my glare to Trey.

He held his hands in defense. “Calm down.”

I stuck my finger in his face. “Don’t fucking tell me to calm down! How the fuck do you know?!”

“I may be good looking, but I’m not stupid. I was looking for a throwback picture for Instagram and saw a photo of you and Chris in middle school and recognized you. You look really good now.” Trey stated looking me up and down.

I turned back to my computer clicking Google Chrome and began typing. “5 years ago, I looked like a cockroah. Remember? I believe You said that.”

Trey sighed deeply. “Aight I get it.”

I turned to him. “No. You don’t fucking get it. My life was a living hell because of you guys. I cried, I cut. All because you guys.”

“Listen. I’m sorry, Karrueche. I was an idiot, I admit that.”

I scrunched up my nose keeping my eyes off him. “You’re still an idiot.”

Trey chuckled rubbing his forehead. “We’re all idiots. But now we’re more mature and I can see that I treated you badly and I apologize for that. Please forgive me.”

Finally looking in Trey’s eyes, I saw sincere sorrow. Part of me wanted to still hate his guts, while the other part recognized he was truly sorry. I closed my eyes and sighed.

“Trey, it’s gonna take time for me to forgive you.” I stated softly feeling my walls break down.

“I understand. But just know I’m sincerely sorry.” Trey turned back to his computer then looked back at me. “I’m just hoping it doesn’t take too long.”

“You didn’t hurt me the most.”

“Who did?”

I sighed with my eyes still closed. “Chris.”

“Does he remember you? He has to. You guys are best friends.”

Best friends. Somehow, those two little words hurt the fuck out of me. I sighed as I felt a tear fall down my cheek and I whispered with a sore in my throat.

“Not anymore.”

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Chris

Damn. Why is Karrueche so mad? I mean she’s usually mad but she was fucking pissed. Was she mad because I cancelled or because I was hanging out with Jasmine. Or both? I shook my head unfazed and walking back to Jasmine. She pushed away from me.

“Please tell me that was not your girlfriend.” Jasmine looked towards Karrueche who still storming away.

I scrunched up my nose wrapping my arm around her shoulders. “The fuck? Hell nah, ma! She wouldn’t even be my ex, let alone my girl. Girl, you crazy.”

“Then why were you talking to her?” She looked up at me pursing her plump pink lips.

The fuck? Is she my girlfriend now?

“I can’t talk to a female without me being romantically involved with her? I’m talking to you and you’re not my girlfriend.” I told her straight up as we continued to walk down the hall. She sucked her teeth pursing her lips once more before looking up at me.

“But you’re gonna change that, right?”

Before I could open my mouth to answer, the homeroom bell rang and the announcement to report to homeroom came on.

“Students, it’s time to report to homeroom. Students, it’s time to report to homeroom.”

I kissed Jasmine’s cheek and released her from my embrace.

“I’ll see you after school.”

************

Jasmine bit my bottom lip and I pulled away for some air. My lips came back in contact with hers as the people in McDonald’s. Ok, yes we’re making out again. If I’m gonna hang out with a hot chick, we’re gonna make out. Suddenly the unwelcome thought of Karrueche appeared in my head. For a girl who hates the living shit, she seemed really hurt when I cancelled on her to hang out with Jasmine. I pushed Jasmine off my lips.

“What’s wrong?” She questioned with fear and concern laced in her voice.

I shook my head pushing her off my lap. I need to process this. First, when I just meet her, she already hates me and Second, she catches feelings when I ditch her for Jasmine. I smirked a little. So little miss Karrueche has a crush on me.

“Well?” Jasmine urged snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Nothing. It’s just time for me to head home.” I answered taking her hand leading her out of McDonald’s. Once I had dropped Jasmine at her house, I made a U-turn headed to my house. I pulled up into the driveway. I exited my red Toyota Camry locking the doors. I began to go up the steps but then saw the litle blasian fireball walking past my house.

“Hey! Karrueche!” I shouted then ran over to where she stood, obviously irritated.

“What?” She snapped crossing her arms,

“Aight my bad for cancelling and baby girl, I know you got a crush on me but-”

“Ain’t nobody has a crush on your bum ass!” She spat cutting me off then muttered walking away. “In your fucking dreams. Go back to that blonde bitch, asshole!”

I felt my veins pump as anger surged through my body. I stormed over to her grabbing her by the arm forcing her to look at me. I’ve had enough of her shit.

“Then why the fuck are you so mad? Huh? Why the fuck are you such a cold, heartless, and rude bitch?! Answer me!” I tightened my grip on her arm.

Karrueche winced in pain but recovered from it. She looked up at me with big vulnerable brown eyes that screamed sadness. Tears began to release. Finally, her walls were being demolished as she got red in the face and started to wipe her tears that kept coming. Karrueche opened her mouth and spat with so much anger and agony:

“Because you made me this way.”