build your own respect

we really need a word for the inverse of respectability politics

that thing where it’s like “if you’re not modifying your entire lifestyle to stick it to the man in as loud and immediately noticeable a way as possible, you’re not radical enough to get to talk about this”

like for me this is mostly something that happens in disability discourse because I’m white and cis and pretty sure I’m straight, but I’ve also heard other people talk about this happening to them in their respective community politics and it’s honestly just as exhausting in its own way to feel like you have to build up one persona to get your own community to respect you as it is to have to pander to others’ expectations of good behavior in order to not be outright mistreated