build me up from the bones

I went on two dates recently. 

I had a party, a giant board game night in my studio, and I invited about 10 people, then more and more verbally because it was my first week back from the west coast and I missed these people. 

My friend brought a friend of his. Tall, perfectly square jaw, did I mention tall, dark and handsome. Very tall, and handsome. I told him he looked like a movie star from the 1950s. He texted me the next day, after getting my business card the previous night in hopes of getting his band to play one of my shows. 

We texted a bit. He was inquisitive, curious and open, quick on his feet with my sarcasm. I was hesitant, but I agreed to the date, even altering it to include the small theater down the street from the bar we would meet at. He put his arm around me in the theater and I didn’t feel the panic of a stranger touching me. It was comfortable, no pressure or exception, just two slightly too tall for the tiny theaters seats, trying not to laugh and get comfortable. 

That second meeting, a so called first date, went well enough to warrant a kiss at the end of the night. It didn’t compare to a searing kiss I’d received a year before from what I can only settle to call a lead singer/bad boy. But there was something so sweet and reassuring about this man. Man. Boy. I’m turing 28 this year, and he just turned 22. The years separating us much less than the number of times my stomach twisted about it. 

I’ve never, in my entire dating career dated a 22 year old. Not even when I was 22.

But, I realized the extreme distance in our lifestyles shortly into our 2nd date, and over the course of a few hours dreaded the determination in my gut not to alter this sweet, handsome face. His plans, his passions, so unlike mine. I want to flip a house. I want to build something from crumbling somethings. I wanted to find a career that was fitting to my desire to be outside but to make things beautiful. 

I want to charge, chin up, into challenges because they call to me. I don’t need a lot of money, but happiness and hard work. He wanted to be swept up in love, deep and challenging. I was challenging. I was attractive. I laughed in the face of something that scared me, and continued laughing when I got more scared. And he stared at me, my lips, and my eyes, and my collar bones. The way my hands moved, and that I swigged gin straight from the bottle the night he met me.  

I didn’t want to break or bend him, because he already seemed so willing to bend for me. 

Two dates in and he already confessed that he would do whatever I liked, Whatever I wanted. Dinners, dates, a summer of one sided affection had I chose that… That kind of free reign makes certain people tyrants, not lovers. Not parters.  Yes, you can guide a young lover into a better person, or you can alter their personality to an unnatural degree. They become a pleaser. I’ve been there. I did that, because a handsome man 8 years my senior gave me the kind of affection and attention that gets you drunk off life. That makes you watch movies, listen to music you never liked when you were alone, and spend Sundays doing what they wanted. 

I don’t, nor have I ever, want to sweep someone up in my being. I want to sweep each other away, and stand up, soaking wet laughing and grinning in joy at the next challenge. 

I think about the three specific men I’ve dated in my 27 years that have truly challenged me. To seek more, to move, to fight, to be more. They still do, in their absence from my life. I am more. I am so much. I don’t realize it when I look in the mirror. 

I realize it when I leave a little tiny, speck of myself with someone I could have settled with.  Or maybe changed a little bit. It’s not about change it’s about growth. It’s about the distances you travel together without even realizing it, until you see the mile markers that mark your never ending trip to “home”.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that… dating sucks. Because even when it’s okay. You have to communicate with yourself more than anyone else, before you damage yourself and others.

by Lindsay Smith

I will rule for a thousand years, and none shall defy my reign.

I am the sole queen of these lands. Sole heir to the winter and the forests and the streams, sole arbiter of the echoing city streets of stone. So many would keep me from my throne, my true calling. But I have earned my place. I have shown them all what it means to rule.

It started with my sister. From my first hazy memories I remember her shadow weighing down on me, stifling my every move. “One day one of you must rule,” our father said to us, night after night when we gathered at his feet. “If it must be one of you, then I will be the one to choose.”

How could we learn to be sisters with such a decree? All I wanted was a friend, someone to look up to, someone to whisper to at night to keep the darkness away. But I learned quickly that that was only the surest path to her scorn. She saw me as weak, as foolish, as younger. I would reach out to her to pull me up and she would shove me right back down. I would show her my weakness and she would pry it open wide, ragged and bloody.

I didn’t realize the significance, at first, of what our father wanted us to become. Didn’t know what it meant to be queen, or why it was something worth fighting for. But as I learned from my sister, I learned to covet it, to hunger for it so fiercely that everything else tasted dried out and dull. She wanted to rule so that all would obey her. I wanted to rule so she could not.

The first time she tried to kill me, it was my nurse who gave it away. She woke me up in the dead of night and bundled me into a closet, told me not to make a noise no matter what followed. Then the guards came, swords drawn, visors lowered. They were only boys infatuated with my sister, but at the time everyone seemed impossibly old to me, unstoppably strong. I feared them, but I believed my nurse invincible too.

They taught me, quickly, how wrong I was.

After that, my father sent me to the country for a spell. Armed guards, a fleet of tutors, and an ailing count who watched over me with a gaze like sharpened knives. Sometimes the threats came in letters that the count would burn before he thought I could read them. Sometimes, It was assassins in the night.

Worst of all, though, were the long silences. The heaviness of her inaction dragging me to the bottom, drowning me. I never knew when the next assault would come for me.

Slowly, finally, I could wait no longer.

I found the woman in the country market, slender fingers grazing over her wares of pewter charms and crystals and bundled flowers. Her skin was smooth, her hair like silk, and when she looked my way, I saw the kiss of winter in her eyes.

“You look troubled,” she said, and the words wrapped around me like a soft breeze. “You look far too troubled for someone your age.”

I looked away then, ashamed to be so young. If I was older, if I was cleverer, I wouldn’t have to be sent away. I could prove myself worthy of the crown. I could beat my sister for good, beat her just enough that she’d never need attack me again. How foolish, that I thought winning once would be enough.

“Come closer.” She swept her hand over her goods. “Perhaps I might ease some of your pain.”

I started to meet with her every time I could sneak away from the count’s estate. It wasn’t often, but her lessons in the ways of magic filled me up with a sustenance I didn’t know I craved. I wanted to be her, to share her easy confidence and capability, to bend the world toward me with a subtle call the way she did. Her poultices cleared away blemishes and made water drinkable, but they also could boil blood, shatter bones, freeze a pond. She let me practice these skills as though they were interchangeable. She let me build on them, stringing them together like beads on a necklace, as I practiced on the woods beyond her hut.

The more power I gained, the more I sought. At long last, I understood the hunger in my sister’s belly. For now, I hungered too.

“You have a keen mind for magic,” she told me, when I worked something particularly cruel on a sparrow we found feasting on her garden. “A cruel mind. But I think a girl like you has to be cruel.”

“My sister is cruel. I just wish to survive.”

“Then I hope I’ve equipped you well,” she said. “Be like the wintervine. Feast on cold, on nothingness. For they have given you nothing. Use it to sprout your ice, your thorns.”

I looked at the wintervine where it flourished in the ice, and I felt its loneliness, its stubbornness, its scorn.

At long last I was of age, and my father sent for me once more. The time to choose was drawing near, but, he confided, in some ways he feared us both. His kingdom needed a decisive leader, yes, a sturdy leader, but compassion, too, he said, was called for. He did not see that he’d been the one to rob us of that. He didn’t see the dark seeds he’d planted in both our minds take hold.

My sister began her attempts anew, but this time, I was ready.

The first men she sent to kill me simply disappeared. They became nothing more than char burned into the cobbles of my bedroom floor. The next, though, I made sure she saw, their flayed corpses piled at the palace gates. Cruelty was my reflex, now, and each test made it stronger still.

“You cannot beat me,” she hissed, over a banquet table while our father entertained. “I deserve this. I will earn this.”

She cut her steak with a furious scrape of knife and fork. The noise grated at my soul. When was the last time she had shown kindness? It had been carved out of her, if it had ever been there at all.

Father wanted to make one of us a queen. He wanted someone compassionate. Maybe compassion was still in me; maybe not.

But it would never be in her.

As she swallowed, the lump of meat grew thorns. I could almost feel it myself as I directed it, as it swelled inside her throat, tore its way through her flesh. She gagged and choked, and I imagined she gagged and choked on all the hatred she’d let fester for years and years.

I wanted the coldness, the loneliness I felt to be visible to everyone. I wanted those thorns.

Frost sprouted from my fingertips and webbed across the banquet table. She scrabbled for a goblet of wine to try to wash the meat down, but everything turned cold. A guard stepped forward—but she deserved no kindness, no comfort. I never felt her embrace, so why should she feel the same? He withered, cold and empty, before he could reach her.

“What is the meaning of this?” my father cried. “Stop this at once!”

But the cold was radiant, alive now, warming me even as it drew warmth away from everything. The dark thorns in my sister’s throat flourished, drinking up the cold, and twined their way across the table to wrap around everyone’s limbs. My breath hung in the air before me as I stood, untouched, unsnared by the darkness and frost.

I had to beat her. I could not let her win.

And if I could feel no warmth, no freedom without her darkness over me, then neither could anyone.

I do not remember what came next, but it did not come for a long time. Icicles hung from the chandeliers; black thorns sprouted from the walls. All was still and glistening and cold. I walked through the hall like a phantom, soundless, for it was how I felt. But I was all that remained of my sister’s hatred. I was her greed given form.

And I will rule for a thousand years. With this cruelty beating inside me, my sister’s words, her greed, her anger—with the coldness she left inside me—I will rule for a thousand more.

Lunchtime Drabble: Short People

Bones x Reader
Words: 449
Warnings: fluff, AOS

A/N: I’m breaking into a “new” fandom for me. I haven’t written anything Star Trek before. 

Y/N stood in the closet glaring at the top shelf. She had been sent in by Dr. McCoy to grab some extra supplies for the away team but he had failed to mention that the supplies were on the top shelf.

“Apparently no one in Starfleet ever thought a stool would come in handy,” Y/N muttered to herself. “That would just make too much sense. Let’s not be practical, that would just be too much!” She continued to grumble to herself as she carefully grabbed the highest shelf her hands could reach and stepped onto the highest shelf her foot could reach and began climbing the shelves. “Good thing I have on this very practical short skirt, clearly made for climbing shelves so that I can do my blasted job.” she muttered to herself as she climbed up a few more shelves. “Who in their right mind builds shelves this high on a starship anyway?!”

“What’s taking so long, Y/N?” Bones demanded from the Medbay.

“I’m working on it, Doc. Having some short people problems in here.” Y/N replied as she climbed up another shelf, this one wobbling slightly.

“What do you mean?” Bones came around the corner just as the shelf gave away and Y/N lost her grip on the top shelf and fell back right into the doctor’s arms.

“Y/N, darlin’ if you wanted to get close to me all you had to do was ask,” Bones grinned.

“Oh please,” Y/N rolled her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “One look your way and it wouldn’t have taken any words at all.”

“You wanna test that theory?” Bones asked, his eyes moving from her eyes to her mouth and back again.

“I’m game if you are,” Y/N whispered. Bones closed the couple of inches between them and claimed her lips. He carefully pulled his arm out from under her knees, allow her feet to touch the floor and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her flush against his body and up onto her toes. He tipped his head slightly, deepening the kiss.

Neither Bones or Y/N heard the captain come into the room until he cleared his throat for the second time. They broke away from each other, blushes creeping up their faces.

“Bones, do you have those supplies ready yet?” Jim asked with a huge grin on his face. Bones easily reached into the top shelf and handed Jim the bag of supplies. “Thank you. As you were.”

Bones grinned and reached for Y/N, pulling her back into the closet and into his arms. The door closed just as Jim glanced back and saw their lips meet again.

What Do Good Girls Say?

OKAY! So this is one of many from my prompt list from last month. I apologize for these taking so long and really hope everyone likes what they get. 

WARNING! This is super long and smutty. I’m so sorry but I really enjoyed writing this.

Prompt: (3) I didn’t know you were a dom and when I called you “Sir” you almost jumped me.
Featuring: Finn Balor

Master List Plug!

P.S. Guess who’s back to posting fanfics again? This girl!

Keep reading

*Alec Lightwood* Rune Teacher

Alec lightwood X Girl

Requested: I wish

Plot: Diana’s been teaching Max Light runes, since she’s no longer is required to go on missions. Alec gains interest in her and begins to remember his past.

Word Count: 1,624

A/N: The gifs I use aren't usually mine, don’t give me credit. Also I do pair Alec with girl. Not because I’m homophobic,  but  it’s because I find Matthew Daddario sexy as hell. If you want a male imagine, all you have to do is request. Not cut down my pride acceptance.

The institute had fast pacing Shadowhunters getting ready for their next missions. Always wearing the traditional black, fitting like a second skin. I missed the feeling and satisfaction I always got from the leathery fabric.

I was not longer required to be on those missions again, I trained everyday. Strengthen my skills everyday. That didn’t help the fact that I lashed out on my last mission. Attacking a downworlder  with a seraph blade. I remembered the anger running through my vein when I constantly stabbed the werewolf in the heart.

Even though werewolves’ weakness is silver, I stabbed so many times that the werewolf couldn’t regenerate. I cried until Alec Lightwood had taken me back to the institute. I didn’t know him personally, But the Lightwood name has been known throughout the Shadowhunter world. it happened so long ago I don’t think he remembers.

I remember is clearly.

“This one is creation.” The small gentle voice pulled me from my inner thoughts. I looked down to see the Rune book laid across both my and Max’s laps. His tiny index finger pointing to a circled run with a lineless A in the middle.

We were sitting on a stiff white leather couch that sat against a far wall. The loud noise off Shadowhunters not reaching our ear range. Light kissed our skin from the window behind us. Warming us from the cool and feel of the institute.

“That’s correct, Max.” I said smiling , He looked up at me with beaming bright brown eyes. He hasn’t been able to label that particular rune for a while. “I did it!” Max yelled as he jumped off the couch and started happy dancing.

I couldn’t help but giggle at his adorableness, He’s never done that before. Than again he’s never been stuck on a rune before. He usually knew most of them already.

I looked up feeling eyes burning on me. Dark brown eyes locked on mine and on to the sight of his little brother’s excitement. He looked back at me and slightly smiled  before walking away.

I frowned looking at the time on my phone, 4:00pm Sharp. “Max, your mother will be here soon to take you back to Idris.” I mentioned, taking the Rune book into my hands and standing up.

“Awe, but why cant I stay with you until our next rune session?” Max asked looking up at me with big doe eyes. I giggled kneeling down to his height. “Because, Max. You have to go back home. Your mother won’t be happy if you stay here.” I explained to him and gave him a hug afterwards.

He wrapped his small arms around my neck, latching onto me for as long as he could. When I started teaching Max about runes I could feel our bond grow stronger. He was like a little brother to me and I felt like a big sister to him.

“Max it’s time to go.” Mayrse’ s bold voice made us pull apart. I stood up and greeted her with a smile that she returned. Max sighed loudly, “Mom, I don’t want to go back. I want to stay here with Diana.” Max whined.

“Max we’ve talked about this before, You can’t stay here and don’t whine it isn’t not polite.” Mayrse said. I watched as Max lazily started walking to the entrance of the institute. Mayrse rolled her eyes at her youngest as she walked to me.

“I don’t know what you do to make him like you so much.” Mayrse said.

I shrugged “All I did was give him the time of day.”

“I can’t repay you enough for teaching him, he’s been so good with his runes ever since.” She mentioned before walking off. 

I frowned starting my own way to the place I call home now, my room. I’m not ready to start going on missions again. That fear I hold is getting me closer to getting my runes stripped. Just having the thought rolling I’m my mind made me shiver.

My mind was too lost to comprehend where I was going. I walked straight into someone, knocking the thoughts to oblivion. Before my body could react the person in front of me already did.

Wrapping their arm around my waist holding me close to their body. Breathing heavily, anxiety starting leaving me. I closed my eyes silently thanking the person’s instinct.

The person started to let me go, I looked up to see the same dark brown eyes looking down on me. The eyes from earlier, Those eyes belonged to Alec Lightwood.

He furrowed his eyebrows searching my face for something. “I’m sorry I wasn’t looking were I was going.” I said feeling my checks heat up slightly. “Yeah, You weren’t.” He said bluntly making me bite my lip, anxiety crawling backup my spine.

His expression changed as if a lightbulb went off in his head. “You look really familiar.” He piped up searching my face again, I shrugged. “I teach your little brother runes.” I suggested, wondering if that’s what he meant.

“No-I mean yes I know that. But I’ve seen your face before that. On a Mission?” He asked me. I swallowed my nervousness back down, I shook my head. “That’s impossible, I haven’t been on a mission in a few years.” I said.

“You’re the girl that lost control.” He said narrowing his eyebrows at me, waiting for answer. I exhaled slowly.

“It wasn’t like that.” My voice harsh, hiding the vulnerability behind it.

 “You stabbed a werewolf enough times that he died. What do you call that?” He asked crossing his arms over his chest. My eyes widen, I had nothing to cover that. I couldn’t cover anything that was my true past.

“I have to go.” I chocked out, tears burning my eyes. I rushed past him, bodies pressed against each other. I ran off, Alec calling out for me. I ignored his calls as I remembered the death of my sister.

Clonk, clonk. The loud sound of the wooden staffs meeting echoed through out the spacious training room. Isabel in front of me with a determined expression, Clonk, clonk. I stepped back from the impact of the hits.

Hair tied back as sweat traveled down my face with ease. My tight grip on the staff started to loosen. The sweat on my palms started to build up, Clonk. The staff flew out of my hands.

I was defenceless as Isabel used the staff to knock my left foot from under me. I hit the floor and slide from the hard impact, I seethed from where my tail bone landed.

I looked up to she Isabel holding the staff’s end to my throat. She frowned, “What’s gotten into you?” She asked taking the stick from me. “I’m usually the one on the floor, you have more training than I do on a weekly schedule.”  She mentioned as I propped myself on my shoulders.

When I trained with a partner it was Isabel, she was the only women in this institute that could keep up. Isabel never takes it easy on me and I thank her for that. She makes me stronger with my combat skills. We only train together, we’ve never hung out together. Not since my younger sister.

“I’ve been distracted lately, take in the glory while you can.” I smirking as I lifted myself off the floor. Walking of my aching tail bone, well trying to. I bent down to capture my staff into my hands.

“Let’s see if I can kick your ass again.” Isabel said slyly turning her in her hand smoothly.

“Izzy I think you should rest for a bit,I got this.” The husky voice said, the boldness letting me know it was Alec. I turned around to see him coming from the door, with confident strides.

Isabel looked from me to Alec, she nodded slowly. “Sure.” Isabel said, giving off she was little suspicious. She cautiously handed the staff to him, He took standing in front of me with a tiny distance as he watched Isabel leave.

I was confused why he shoed off Isabel like he did. I haven’t talked to him since I ran off, he didn’t try to reach out to me until now. “What are you doing here Lightwood?” I asked as I walked towards the staff rack, knowing I wasn’t going to train anymore.

“I wanted to talk about you running off.” He said as he followed to put away the staff.

I crossed my arms, “Alec, there is nothing to talk about.” My voice strained as I spoke.

“I was harsh on you, your little sister died and I should have been more understanding.” Alec said, I felt my throat get sore as tears threatened to spill.

“You know nothing!” I raised my voice slamming my staff back into it’s rightful place. I started to storm away, a hand caught my wrist and pulled me back.

Lips fell onto mine, forcing themselves onto me. I tried pulling away with the strength I had , but Alec held my face to his. My heart started to slow from the kiss and the tears disappeared.

He kissed me slowly and softly, erasing the grief and the thought of my sister away. I kissed back, deepen the kiss. I’ve never felt this close to someone before and it was scaring me.

Alec slowly pulled away, I looked into his soft brown eyes with wide startled eyes. His hands still around my neck and checks, “What was that for?” I asked my voice shaking a little.

“I wanted to do that since you started your runes with Max. Now I had an excuse.” He mumbled knowing I can hear him clearly.

“And what’s that?” I asked softly.

“To calm you down.”

don’t forget: i love the trees
but the cities are something else.
they sing to me, to me as one in
a glorious whirling machine, and i can hear
the gaps in their voices
as they stop to breathe, the
smoker’s roughness, the tear-stained
strain to their supplications.
i’m in love with the streetlights, all
buzzing on at once, each opal and topaz and
crumpled bags of doritos. the
city doesn’t bother to tug my hand, because
it is a proud thing, with
a bloody beating heart, a vicious thing,
with a deep-set crimson smile.
a beautiful thing, filled up with
human eyeshine. we build cathedrals
out of bones and healing, from dusk
until dawn. we build museums out of
mirrors and desperation and anguish.
every act of creation makes the city
like the sky.
—  city girl//ast.

anonymous asked:

Sir Atticus, do you (or the shop) have calling cards? Most shops I ordered from online have one included in the packages, so I was wondering if you have one too. (I collect these things, you see.)

Not usually, no.

This will be more information than you bargained but the coffee is brewing and the waffles won’t be ready for another 5 minutes.

In general, packaging design and inserts into shipped out parcels, in my experience, follows one of two lines of thought: “go overboard” or “go lean.”

Evil Supply Co. is running a bit lean on this side of things. Earlier this year, I tweaked the free bits included at various tiers of order purchase so people would get more things at lower points and scaled back the limited package branding we do regularly. I can slate budget to “more stuff” or “package design” and that felt the best choice.

“Are you being cheap or saving your pennies?” (a question I ask myself regularly)

(Saving pennies to upgrade everything for more, bigger, free things.)

Evil Supply Co. started with a super lightweight, off-the-shelf tech platform that cost a few bucks a month. Last year, we built phase 1 of 3 at the cost of a few months of rent.

Late summer or early autumn, we’re launching the blog (because I want everything to fit together, this will cost about the same as a very cheap, very old used car). This is phase 2 of 3.

In late 2018 to mid 2019 (depending on how things shake down), phase 3 will launch, which costs about as much as a very small house in the middle of nowhere. The tech plans have been laid out, the programming bones are ready, I’m just saving up the pennies to build it up.

And then, things get really weird.

So once we have the tech system built up and things are humming, the rest of the year will be spent building, essentially, an internal ad agency exclusively servicing the companies I write about and draw for Evil Supply Co.

Along with my pennies, I’m hoarding favors from people who do things I cannot to teach me things I do not know to build up things in the background that won’t be seen for a few years yet.

But when you do!

You’ll either think “holy crap that crazy bastard did it” or have completely forgotten about this ramble or won’t have read it because you’re not part of the nearly 21,000 (this still staggers me) subscribers to this blog yet.

In short because breakfast-dinner is now ready:

I go basic on the non-product parts of your order to funnel limited resources into other things.

Fic Roundup (Day Of Premiere Edition)

So, since it’s the PREMIERE DAY, I’ve decided that it would be nice to gather all of my fics (thus far) into one nice neat little place:


Complete (in publication order):

anonymous asked:

Can you compare and contrast stelenas first love scene to delena"s?

Um, OK. First, I want to talk about the context because I maintain that in 4x07, what Elena needed was to talk to someone she trusted because her life is actually turned upside down.

I mean, she broke up with her boyfriend of three years literally a day previous; her brother brutally attacked her; her best friend tells her she doesn’t even recognize her anymore, like she’s in a really vulnerable place and she actually says earlier on in the episode that she’s confused and what she needs is to be alone to figure everything out. But instead what happens is this:

In 1x10, this is after Stefan tries to leave town because he doesn’t want to further endanger Elena’s life or the other people in the town but because Logan is a newbie vampire he stays around, checks up on her, asks if it’s OK that he’s there, he spends the entire night explaining to Elena why they can’t work:

and Elena has the entire night plus every episode since 1x07 to mull over the pros and cons of their relationship and they actually have a conversation about the danger of him being around her:

They speak about what they wanted their futures to be before their lives became what they are now:

Like they talk so much about each other, about their circumstance, about what this is, what they are, what they could[n’t] be throughout the episode and Stefan still tries to do the right thing and walk away from Elena and Elena has a moment in the car where she resolves herself and refuses to let him walk away from her, there’s build-up for the past 10 episodes and build-up within the episode that leads to this:

So now that context is out of the way, the physicality of their scenes. I mean, Damon and Elena were basically all about just finally being able to bone, relieving all of that sexual tension and frustration, like to me, it really looks like they just need to get it out of their system, it almost feels clinical in that sense because I watch them and I get it that it’s like this-is-so-hot-I-can’t-control-how-much-I-want-you frenzy type of sex but I’m like, you guys look so busy, you guys looks like you’re putting so much energy in being hot are you even enjoying anything you’re doing right now? It looks hella sloppy:

With Stelena, there’s this urgency to their kisses for sure, like they come into the living room from outside already kissing:

But there’s a sense of closeness to that urgency, they’re urgent because they have a physical need to express their love for each other, which is why Elena always brings Stefan’s head closer:

Because their first love scene is about intimacy through sex as opposed to sex for sex’s sake and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having sex just to have sex, not every time you have it has to be about love but the show is trying to convince me that DE was and it was like, you just needed to get that out of your system.

Like DE was also about, so how many spots in the living room can we hit before we get upstairs:

It’s like really quick. Stelena was about savouring being with each other, it was about connecting with each other, which also brings me to this, there’s so much eye contact between Stefan and Elena:

Because they want to see each other, they want to engage with each other, they really want to feel each other:

Like their lips linger against each other and Stefan actually kisses her again before they pull away to look at each other because they’re like legit connecting. And Damon and Elena do not make eye contact, they’re in bed and just, I mean I know it’s supposed to look like they know what they’re doing but it just looks like they’re clumsily trying to bone, like I’m just seeing limbs:

Like yeah, Elena’s smiling but that smile, to me, just looks like “lol, what are you doing?”

Stelena are like, so it’s about the journey, not the destination, I’m just really about being with you in this moment right now:

and the reciprocity of their pleasure:

And it looks like, I just want to kiss every inch of your skin, I want to memorize your body so let’s take our time.

Whereas this:

I get it, it’s supposed to be hot but again more limbs and Elena’s face just looks like, I mean yeah … as opposed to:

Where it looks like she’s reveling in Stefan’s touch and she strokes her hand over his, which is on her face and there’s MORE eye contact:

Because connection.

^^ Connection.

That’s honestly the biggest difference.

*edit* three years was supposed to be three seasons.
Narrados en una canción (P. 2)
  • ARIES: Houdini - Foster The People

Rise above going to start the war
What you want, what you need,
What’d you come here for?
Well, an eye for an eye
And an ‘F’ for fight
They’re taking me down as a prisoner’s riot

I’ve got shackles on, my words are tied
Fear can make you compromise
Lights turned up, it’s hard to hide
Sometimes I want to disappear

Focus on your ability
Focus on your ability
Now focus on your ability
Focus on your ability

  • TAURO: The Lazy Song - Bruno Mars

Today I don’t feel like doing anything
I just want to lay in my bed
Don’t feel like picking up my phone,
So leave a message at the tone
Because today I swear I’m not doing anything

I’m going to kick my feet up then stare at the fan
Turn the TV on, throw my hand in my pants
Nobody’s going to tell me I can’t

Tomorrow I’ll wake up, do some P90X
Find a really nice girl,
Have some really nice sex
And she’s going to scream out
This is great
-Oh my god, this is great-

Oh yes, I said it, I said it
I said it 'cause I can

  • GÉMINIS: Chandelier - Sia

Party girls don’t get hurt
Can’t feel anything, when will I learn?
I push it down, push it down
I’m the one for a good time call
Phone’s blowing up, ringing my doorbell
I feel the love, I feel the love

I’m going to swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier
I’m going to live like tomorrow doesn’t exist
Like it doesn’t exist
I’m going to fly like a bird through the night
Feel my tears as they dry
I’m going to swing from the chandelier
From the chandelier

But I’m holding on for dear life
Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
Because I’m just holding on for tonight
Help me, I’m holding on for dear life
Won’t look down, won’t open my eyes
Keep my glass full until morning light
Because I’m just holding on for tonight
On for tonight

  • CÁNCER: One Way Or Another - Blondie

One way or another I’m going to find you
I’m going to get you, get you, get you, get you
One way or another I’m going to win you
I’m going to get you, get you, get you, get you
One way or another I’m going to see you
I’m going to meet you, meet you, meet you, meet you
One day maybe next week, I’m going to meet you
I’m going to meet you, I’ll meet you 

I’ll walk down the mall
Stand over by the wall
Where I can see it all, find out who you call
Lead you to the supermarket checkout
Some specials and rat food
Get lost in the crowd 

  • LEO: Primadonna Girl - Marina And The Diamonds

Primadonna girl, yeah,
All I ever wanted was the world,
I can’t help that I need it all,
The primadonna life, the rise and fall,
You say that I’m kinda difficult,
But it’s always someone else’s fault,
Got you wrapped around my finger, babe,
You can count on me to misbehave…

Primadonna girl,
Would you do anything for me?,
Buy a big diamond ring for me?,
Would you get down on your knees for me?,
Pop that pretty question right now baby…

Beauty queen on a silver screen,
Living life like I’m in a dream,
I know I’ve got a big ego,
I really don’t know why it’s such a big deal, though…

  • VIRGO: Boulevard Of Broken Dreams - Green Day

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s home to me and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I’m the only one and I walk alone
I walk alone I walk alone
I walk alone and I walk

My shadow’s the only one that walks beside me
My shallow hearts the only thing that’s beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Till then I’ll walk alone

  • LIBRA: Pretty Hurts - Beyoncé

Pretty hurts
Shine the light on whatever’s worse
Perfection is the disease of a nation
Pretty hurts
Shine the light on whatever’s worse
Tryna fix something
But you can’t fix what you can’t see
It’s the soul that needs the surgery

Just another stage
Pageant the pain away
This time I’m gonna take the crown
Without falling down, down

Ain’t no doctor or therapeutic that can take the pain away
The pain’s inside
And nobody frees you from your body
It’s the soul that needs surgery
It’s my soul that needs surgery
Plastic smiles and denial can only take you so far
And you break when the paper signs you in the dark
You left a shattered mirror
And the shards of a beautiful girl

  • ESCORPIO: Don’t Cry - Guns N’ Roses

Don’t you cry tonight
I still love you, baby
Don’t you cry tonight
Don’t you cry tonight
There’s a heaven above you baby
And don’t you cry tonight

Give me a whisper
And give me a sigh
Give me a kiss before you tell me goodbye
Don’t you take it so hard now
And please don’t take it so bad
I’ll still be thinking of you
And the times we had, baby

And please remember that I never lied
And please remember how I felt inside
Now honey, you got to make it your own way
But you’ll be alright now, sugar
You’ll feel better tomorrow
Come the morning light now baby 

  • SAGITARIO: West Coast - Lana Del Rey

Down on the West Coast
They got a saying:
“If you’re not drinking, then you’re not playing”
But you’ve got the music
You’ve got the music in you, don’t you?

You push it hard I pull away
I’m feeling hot and on fire
I guess that no one ever really
Made me feel that much higher
Te deseo cariño, boy it’s you I desire
Your love, your love, my love

I can see my baby swinging
His Parliament’s on fire
And his hands are up on the balcony
And I’m singing oh baby, oh baby, I’m in love
I can see my sweet boy swaying
He’s crazy y cubano como yo my love
On the balcony and I’m saying
Move baby, move baby, I’m in love…

  • CAPRICORNIO: Viva La Vida - Coldplay

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy’s eyes
Listened as the crowd would sing:
“Now the old king is dead, long live the king”

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can’t explain
I know Saint Peter won’t call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

  • ACUARIO: Imagine - John Lennon

Imagine all the people
Living for today…
Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace…

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world…

  • PISCIS: Some Nights - FUN

Some nights I stay up
Cashing in my bad luck
Some nights I call it a draw
Some nights I wish that my lips
Could build a castle
Some nights I wish they’d just fall off

That’s alright, I found a martyr in my bed tonight
Stopped my bones
From wondering who I, who I am, who I and who am I?

Well some nights, I wish that this all would end
Because I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I’m scared you’ll forget me again
Some nights, I always win, I always win


Kara is now adoptable

  • Kara is a bird as you can see,he resembles a blue raven to be more precise

Likes include          

  • flying or soaring
  • bubbles
  • stars
  • being petted on his feathers near his neck
  • lightly being stroked by the wings -being hand fed(you don’t need to do this but it makes him feel special)
  • cold climates(like freezing)
  • origami
  • isses on his tumtum
  • shiny things
  • looking at fishes 
  • sweets and sour things

 Dislikes include

  • Anything that has to do with. fights
  • being soaked in water
  • getting his feathers ruffled
  • being taken away from his food(pet him afterwards, guys gotta eat xD) 
  • bugs….like don’t shove bugs near him…that’s gross and he’ll hiss .w. -getting his feathers plucked 
  • his tail being pulled


  • He talks but he likes saying ‘coo’ a lot,like an owl 
  • he’ll put his wings or tail on you face to show he wants something
  • he may leave to do a morning/midnight flight without telling you
  • if he doesn’t use his magic he’ll resort to hurting himself in order to heal himself since the magic build up(so have him heal your wounds or scars or anything that hurts, it takes 3 months for the magic to build up without being used)
  •  cooing 
  • hanging out on any high surface far from the ground 
  • …he smiles creepily when he sees you with any injuries cuz’ he knows he is the only one who can help…right? 


  • You can tell he is blushing if his markings turn blue
  • he can be adopted with a Jack bitty from @bitty-shelter-shop to make him more mellow
  • he is bisexual
  • If you have anymore question please ask

au where Will is a farmer who opens up a stand at the local farmer’s market Hannibal visits every Saturday. Hannibal is drawn to his stand by the beautiful bunches of swiss chard and fresh eggs and artisanal goat cheese because Will is a multi-talented farmer like that. He has a scowl on his face as he hides behind his glasses reading the farmer’s almanac (because this is a FARMER au, what else would he read???), and Hannibal asks some pretentious question about his chickens and Will gives some grumpy response without even looking up from the planting chart he’s poring over and Hannibal buys a dozen eggs and three varieties of cheese and so many greens he can barely fit them in his basket and Will still refuses to make eye contact.

Hannibal is smitten immediately by the grumpy man hiding his beauty behind those thick frames and that mop of messy hair falling around his face and those hands that he knows work the earth until they ache and he goes back to Will’s stand every single week, and every week it’s the same. Hannibal finds himself utterly addicted to the routine, his week becomes nothing more than a countdown to seeing Will on Saturday morning and being met with a frown and eyes locked firmly on the ground. Everything he cooks tastes more delicious using Will’s ingredients, and he begins planning his meals for the following week around what Will has to offer.

The Saturday that he shows up and Will’s stand is gone, Hannibal feels his heart sink down into his Italian leather loafers. He asks around to find out if anyone knows where he’s gone, all he has is a first name to go on, and by the end of the morning he manages to find out that Will Graham runs a farm in Wolf Trap, Virginia and has a propensity for up and disappearing from the market for months at a time.

But this is Hannibal and he’s in full blown obsession mode at this point and that just won’t do. So like the creep he is he hops in his Bentley and drives to Wolf Trap and finds Will’s farm and when he gets there Will is wrist deep in dirt planting tomatoes and finally, finally he meets Hannibal’s gaze, but really only to ask him what the fuck he’s doing and “are you stalking me???” and Hannibal smiles because lbr the answer is yes but he manages to flatter his way out of Will calling the cops by explaining that another’s produce simply won’t do and he has a big dinner party coming up and it won’t be the same without something from Will’s garden.

Will gets back down in the dirt and shoots Hannibal a look that’s a mix between I’m irritated af and I’m genuinely flattered af and he tells him if he expects to get anything out of that garden he’d better lose the jacket and tie and roll up his sleeves, because he has a lot of work to do, and he’s not selling Hannibal a single leaf of anything until they’re finished.

Hannibal ruins a very expensive pair of pants and his favorite shoes but Will is radiant covered in sweat and dirt and he actually invites Hannibal in for lunch and Hannibal goes home with a trunk full of vegetables and Will’s number scribbled on a slip of paper tucked inside his pocket.

Frat Boy (Part 13)

Originally posted by gleefinn

Summary: Dean and the reader finish up the semester before heading off to spend winter break together…

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

Tags: @dancingalone21 @daydreamingintheimpala @pulgapelayo18@perpetualabsurdity  @jessiedangerous @charliebradbury1104 @squirels-angels-and-moose @imma-fcking–nerd@mint-and-pastel-pink @everyday-supernatural-af @dracsgirl​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @marcar44​ @drugpug@nerdygirlwithacrush @youwerelikeadream

Pairing: AU!Dean x reader

Word Count: 2,700ish

Warnings: language, smut

A/N: A little dom reader for a change…

Keep reading

Worked Up

Originally posted by mukenope

Words: 1000+

Request: No

Rating: R

A/N: requests are open so please send some of your ideas in!!!

My hand was glued to the number two orange wooden pencil gripped tightly in my hand, the wooden tool with graphite stuffed in the middle of it with a pink eraser held above it gliding smoothly against the line paper set in front of me. A sigh leaves me lips as I write down the rest of my sentence before staring down at my science text book in front of me and reading the next question.

It was nights like this were I would just want to shut the textbooks and binders out in front of me and go into my bathroom, run the tub and lighting some candles and rest my aching sore bones into the warm steamy water and just forget about my grades that I have to keep up to make my family proud, or impress universities that I want to apply too. I just want forget about the constant nagging about my future.

Gently sitting my pencil beside me, I rise my hands in the air and let out a tired moan as I feel my limbs stretch and crack before I lean back and close my eyes. The silence of my room calming me down and somewhat lolling me to sleep before I hear the pine tree right next to my window rap against it.

I peel my eyes open slowly as a sigh rolls through my lips before I bend over and take my pencil back into my hand before re-reading the question again. The noise from the tree doesn’t stop but only comes down harder which is very weird since the sound of rain and hail cannot be heard.

And just as I hear a heavy knock pound against the glass of the window, sounding so heavy that it could shatter it, I’m jolting out of my comfy warm confines and rushing towards the glass. Instead of seeing leaves sticking to the window or the branches from the tree against the window, I see the one and only Calum Hood smiling up at my through the glass before waving his hand at me.

With a roll of my eyes I pull my ivory curtains further apart before pushing up the window frame, the crisp spring wind hitting my naked shoulders before I step back from the window and watch as Calum fits himself into my room.

“What the hell are you doing here?” I question while placing my hand on my pink polar bear pajama shorts and letting out a breathy laugh when I see him nearly fall over when trying to fish his left leg out of the window.

“What the hell am I doing here? Why the hell haven’t you answer any of my text messages?” Calum rushes out while stepping towards me, his bushy eyebrows nearly touching his hair line, only making me let out a sigh before shaking my head.

“I’m sorry, babe. I turned off my phone so I could finish my homework,” I explain while walking over to Calum and placing my thumbs on his concerning eyebrows.

“Why can’t you leave it on, I thought you were at a party or something,” Calum breathes out before placing his hands on top of mine, making me smile before shaking my head. “Me at a party? You really need to lower your standards of me.” I laugh before pulling away from Calum’s touch and making my way towards my bed filled with numerous papers, pens, and high lighters scattered everywhere.

“Also, whenever I have my phone on I can never get off of it, so that’s why I turn it off so it won’t distract me.” I say when tossing myself on my bed and grasping the pencil back up in my hand and picking at the eraser.

“But I was so worried!” Calum exclaims before walking towards me and falling on my binders, only making me let out a groan. “Will you shut up and get off my crap, I need this to get through school.” I rush out while shoving his shoulder, only making Calum grunt before sitting up and crawling towards me, papers crumbling below him as he sets himself next to me.

“You’re worrying about school too much, you need to relax.” Calum states while running his eyes down my tired frame. A sigh rolls through my lips before I toss the wooden pencil at the black binder in front of me and run my fingers through my hair.

“I can’t, I just need to finish two more questions and then we can talk for the rest of the night.” I say while turning and smiling at Calum, only making him huff and jut out his bottom lip before peering up at me.

“No, relax please.” Calum huffs before leaning over and placing soft kisses into my neck, a shiver running down my spine as I feel his plump lips continue to run along my warm skin.

“C-alum, just let me finish,” I whisper while leaning into his intoxicating touch that begins to bring me into serenity.

And it wasn’t like I didn’t want Calum to be here and comfort me when I’m stressed because I actually really needed it but, what I don’t need is him continuously placing his addicting kisses along my shoulders and neck so I can lose my train of thought and forget about my homework.

That’s one of the reason why I liked Calum, he would send me into serenity just by the way he places small pecks on my lips, nose, or shoulder. Or when his large hand would always find its way running up my arm, thigh, or back. Just those simple touches make me relax and I find that a good thing and bad.

Bad because it leads me from not focusing on what I should be doing, for example my homework. This was probably one of the reasons why I fell for Calum, it wasn’t only because of his beautiful smile and quirky personality, but it was the simplest things that would touch my heart, which would be my good reason.

“Come on baby, you’ve been worked up this whole entire week, let me help you relax, you’re so tense.” Calum breathes against my ear and I feel my body lean into him more before I feel his lips find their way pressing delicate kisses along my jawline.

“Cal,” I breath before I feel his lips leave my jawline and connect with my lips, the taste of cigarettes and cherry’s burns on Calum’s tongue as he uses it to swipe into my mouth, his tongue tangling with mine before pulling away and placing chaste kisses down my neck, the sound of papers and pen falling off the bed because of Calum’s movements.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make it quick so you can get back to your work,” Calum chuckles deeply against the nape of my neck which sends a chill down my back. With a nod of my head and a pinch to Calum’s side that basically states my consent, I feel Calum manuever his way down my body.

His lips kissing along my collar bones before I feel his fingers tug on my white tank top, sending it over my head to reveal my bare chest, his tongue running over his bottom lip before reaching down and sucking one of my nipples into his mouth, a moan immediately slipping from my lips as my hands tear away from Calum’s side and tug gently at his curls.

“Baby,” I moan before I feel Calum twirl my nipple in his mouth with his tongue before spitting it out and blowing on it, his other hand pinching my nipple between his fore finger and his thumb. A whine leaving my lips as Calum some how makes his way down my body while now giving twisting and tugging on both of my nipples.

“Sorry babe, I’m gonna have to use my hands for this now.” Calum states while tugging both of his hands off my now fully erect nipples and bringing them to run down my sides before stopping down at my cartoon pajama shorts.

“These are cute,” Calum laughs while staring up at me, I shake my head before gently tugging on Calum’s curls,“Calum get on with it.” I say before I hear him chuckle and his soft finger tips run against my skin as he tugs down my shorts. I feel Calum’s lips come in contact with my core just as he tosses my shorts somewhere across the room, my eyes never tearing away from Calum’s head between my legs.

“Smell so sweet,” Calum before running his tongue along my slit, my breath catching in my throat before I let a sigh of relief slip through. “Taste sweet also, guess I got a two for one deal.” Calum chuckles which only makes me roll my eyes, because of course Calum is going to crack a joke just before he does anything to pleasure me.

“Jesus Christ Calum just get on with it,” I say in exhaustion but all I get is a ‘shh’ in reply before I feel the pad of Calum’s thumb tear my panties away from my core and his warm tongue slip between my folds. My back immediately bucking off the bed as my fingers are gripped tightly in Calum’s hair.

I feel his tongue to wiggle in my heat before thrusting in and out of me, moans falling from my lips as I feel Calum’s hair tickle my thighs before I feel Calum tear one of his hands away from my knee and place it on my pelvic bone, his thumb coming in contact with my clit has a whine slipping through my lips.

“Fuck don’t stop,” I moan out while grasping onto Calum’s locks tightly, my eyes clamping shut as I feel my hips shot of my bed, and the faint sound of paper crumpling and pencils falling of my bed can be heard as I feel the familar pressure in my stomach build up.

“I’m gonna come soon, baby, more,” I whimper when tugging on Calum’s hair, my eyes opening slightly as I see Calum tear his thumb away from my panties and bring them to my core, I watch as his index finger thrusts into my core, making a high pitched moan leave my mouth a float into the air.

And with Calum’s tongue and finger both protruding my entrance while his thumb continues to run slobby figure eight’s on my clit, I feel my climax sitting on the edge as Calum continues to send pleasure throughout my whole entire body. Just by the warm feel of his tongue, the length of just his index finger, and the roughness from the pad of his thumb has my toe curling and another moan fall from my lips as I feel myself get pushed over the edge.

My eyes screw shut and my back is off the bed, the sound of slobby kisses being pressed to my inner thighs before being pressed along my body as my eyes peeling open and has me looking down at Calum as he continues to press kisses down my body.

“You alright now? Relaxed.” Calum says before placing a slobby kiss to my lips, a smug smile tugs on the corner of mine before I nod my head gently. “Thank you.” I say while running my hands down Calum’s arms before resting them at his biceps.

“Hey you were worked up, it’s the least I can do.”

[sorry for any spelling misktakes and shitty ending]

I don’t want to fix your heart.

I want to fix your bones- the ones that wore down and cracked after years of misuse.
I want to build up your frame so you can stand on your own, instead of leaning on others.
I want to make you feel like you can live.

—  Nicole Torres // in your broken bones

anonymous asked:

For the mods: Who started the idea of the Ask Rhodie blog then?

From Mod Colley: “Yo, that would be me.  As @rollem-bones said, I kinda fell in love with the character, and wanted to do more with them.”

“Originally with FATE, you build your character through gameplay, kind of creating their backstory as you go. When we started moving beyond the experiment, I wanted to try and flesh Rhodie out more. So I figured doing a couple Q&As would help me out. I expected, at most, 2-3 questions total, and even then only from folks I knew.” 

“Then turned out folks liked her, people kept asking questions, folks wanted to learn more, people kept showing up, doing art, asking really fun questions, and here we are 3 months later still answering stuff.”

“As long as folks keep asking questions, they’ll keep getting answered. It has been a fun 3 months, and I appreciate everything everyone has done to keep this thing rolling. Folks like @dragamation and @akunim showing off their creative sides, others like @rikmach and @introbulus keeping the Q&A going, the rather well behaved Anons, all of ya, I appreciate it. Thank you.”

So, this is how my legs look when I’m relaxed.

This is not a normal posture for a leopard gecko–though it’s normal for me.

A more normal posture would be to have my legs tucked up a bit with my feet flat on the ground, and not resting on my elbows, and my legs should be a lot more muscular; you can see mine are still pretty thin and not toned looking. That’s okay though, I have a LOT of weight I need to gain, and I guess I’m just going to get it in my legs later.

I’m hoping with weight gain and moving around more that I build up some leg muscle, but even that probably won’t fix the position of my legs much, because that is due to bone deformities from my MBD.

At some point, while I was being starved by my first keepers, my bones started to get soft due to lack of calcium and, eventually, they fractured. My first keepers never took me to a vet and, when they dumped me at the pet store, their vet said there wasn’t much we could do but let them heal and hope it was okay because of the condition that I was in and due to how many small breaks there were.
When they got me, my spine was also kinked pretty severely and I had a bad underbite as well, both of those things have healed up now though. My spine is straight again and my jaws line up!

Obviously, that was all pretty painful (broken bones always are), but my legs healed, and this is how they healed.

I can still walk and I can move pretty fast–not as fast as other leopard geckos, but still pretty fast. I do look a little funny when I walk; a lot of times, I walk on my front elbows instead of my feet because of how weak my front legs still are and because of how my elbow joints healed. My feet are on the ground, but I put my weight on my elbows as my ankle joints are still really weak. They may always be that way, my keeper isn’t sure yet.
Someone on Reddit said I do a very cute army crawl!

My back legs swing out in big circles when I walk due to how they healed and, when I rest, I rest with them splayed out like this because that’s just naturally how they want to go due to how those bones healed. 

I’m resilient though, I can still run and walk and I’m working on climbing. Some day, my front legs will be strong enough to let me climb up onto the big cork bark piece in my enclosure.

Tarot Mentors Challenge / Day 1 / The Wooden Tarot / King of Bones

I pulled out all the court cards and “people” cards from the major arcana to draw a Mentor, and the King of Bones flipped himself over, so that’s who I’m going with for the first 10 days of this challenge. Teach me your secrets, Bone Daddy!

Hermit + VIII of Bones / Take some time for yourself to build up stability.