buffalo books

4

8.3.17

Last night I got a crazy craving for buffalo chicken dip (vegetarian style), so I ran to rite aid and got the supplies I needed and made it! I ate half and saved the other half for today. I admit, it wasn’t my healthiest choice for a meal but it’s crunch time for my research project and I just had to give into the craving. 

I’m working on my annotated bibliography. Once I hand that in tonight then I just have to wait for my advisor to give me notes back and I’ll be one step away from being finished with my summer research! I’m glad that I’ll have a week here in Pittsburgh to just hang out; no research, assignments, or commitments. Just me doing whatever I want (except for when I have to start packing of course). 

So close! 

My magnificent book haul from #IndependentBookstoreDay at Talking Leaves Books in Buffalo, New York, one of my favorite indie bookstores of all time. Thank you to my grandparents—the patrons of this incredible book haul! I was able to buy a lot of wonderful recent releases in hardcover, including If We Were Villains by @m-l-rio, The Night Ocean by Paul La Farge, Swimming Lessons by Claire Fuller, and Exit West by Mohsin Hamid, as well as some backlist titles by Toni Morrison and Angela Davis and two lovely travel tomes. 

GRIMM’S COMPLETE FAIRY TALES: Tales 197-201

#197 OLD RINKRANK

Welp, it finally happened. I’m reaching the end of these fairy tales and I’ve come across the most gruesome and foul thing that the Grimm Brothers ever wrote about. Let me set the stage for you: A princess is trapped in a glass mountain and forced to be a servant for Old Rinkrank (because of course she is). She waits years for her chance to escape, and it finally comes: as Rinkrank is trying to climb inside of her room, she SHUTS HIS LONG LUXURIOUS BEARD IN THE WINDOW. [shudders] The horror! The agony! The beard abuse! I’m having phantom pains in my own beard just thinking about it…


#198 THE CRYSTAL BALL

Princesses that need saving abound in this fairy tale collection. Some rescue missions are easier than others, obviously. Here’s a description of what this particular hero had to face to save the lady:

A wild bull will stand below by a spring, and you must fight with it, and if you have the luck to kill it, a fiery bird will spring out of it, which bears in its body a burning egg, and in the egg the crystal ball lies like a yolk. The bird will not, however, let the egg fall until forced to do so, and if it falls to the ground, it will flame up and burn everything that is near, and melt even ice itself, and with it the crystal ball, and then all your trouble will have been in vain.

After that story, I wouldn’t have blamed the hero for simply saying “No thank you!” and rushing off to live a long and trouble free life without princesses, bulls, fiery birds, burning eggs, or crystal balls.


#199 MAID MALEEN

Maid Maleen’s father wanted her to marry this guy. Maleen loved and wanted to marry another guy. So, her father did what every other well reasoned father would do in that situation: he built a dark tower, shut her inside it for seven years, and waited until she changed her mind. I mean, never mind hearing the poor girl out and considering her feelings. It’s all good, though: his kingdom gets destroyed and she gets to marry her beau. I’m curious as to whether he was more upset about the loss of his kingdom than the loss of his daughter…


#200 THE BOOTS OF BUFFALO LEATHER

A soldier meets a hunter in the forest, and they decide to travel together. The soldier is very forthcoming with the hunter that he has absolutely no talent, and has to beg for his food. They come across some robbers, and guess who defeats them? The soldier. You know how? BY SPEAKING MAGIC WORDS TO THEM AND TURNING THEM INTO STONE. Bro, are you short-changing yourself or just trying to be modest?! No talent, pssh!


#201 THE GOLDEN KEY

I wish I could tell you that the tales part of the Grimm’s collection ends on a high note, and that it is by far the best of all the tales. But nope. This is a single paragraph story about a boy who finds a key and a chest. He turns the key in the chest, and then…nothing. The End. We’re told to wait until the chest is open to see what’s inside. That’s not how literature works, Grimms.

Ah, well. On to the 10 Children’s Legends and the end of the book.

sorry to [the] unknown lover

so based on these posts by @alphacrone and @audiaphilios, here’s 4300 words of post mem cup shenanigans that holster carries with him till his first practice at samwell. cross-posted on ao3 


Ending up at the same bar as the Rimouski team celebrating their Mem Cup is a complete accident and one that Adam’s trying to figure out how to reverse without bringing attention to himself as he leaves the bar. He knows from experience that 6’3” is pretty hard to hide (being one of the youngest on the team makes celebrating in bars a constant act of subterfuge), plus his black and gold Wheat Kings hat is an obvious beacon of a losing team among the blue and white of the champions. Adam hunches down lower in his seat in the bar, turning his hat so the logo isn’t as obvious and hopes no one wants to start a fight with someone on the last place team drinking a lukewarm glass of coke ‘cause his fake isn’t that good.

Adam had gotten here first, having left the final sometime in the third when it was clear the Wolves wouldn’t bounce back from a 4-1 lead. The goal that guaranteed Rimouski’s win came from a Wolves d-man fumbling the puck in his zone and hit a little too close to home for someone whose team was eliminated from the tourney on a similar goal. If Adam had had his way, he wouldn’t have stuck around Canada past the round robin, but he’d booked a flight right back home rather than going back to Brandon and having to double back on himself to get to Buffalo. He gambled booking his flight for the day after the final, hedging his bets on the fact they won had the WHL title and forgetting who they had to qualify for the finals of the tournament. Adam learned the hard way why the Zimmermann-Parson no-look is infamous across the league.

Adam startles when the stool next to him scrapes against the floor and someone drops heavily onto it, sitting a touch too close to him. He looks up out of his coke to glare at the person that ignored the “don’t come near me” vibe Adam’s been projecting. Piercing blue eyes meet his easily. Jack Zimmermann is apparently making a habit of walking through Adam’s defense.

“Que bois-tu?” Zimmermann asks, nodding at Adam’s glass. Adam knows enough French (you don’t play in Brandon without getting stuck in Immersion) to catch the question, but he’s also petty enough to stare blankly at Zimmermann. It’s a poor choice in retrospect; everyone has a crush on Jack Zimmermann’s hockey, but staring at him, Adam can admit he might have a different kind of crush too.

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We took one for the team and rewatched TFP just to check for plot holes and other nonsense.
  • How is Moriarty talking to little Eurus in the plane at the beginning?
  • Not even gonna start on the killer clown
  • If she had such huge mind power, as described by Mycroft, why wouldn’t she have tried to leave the facility earlier?
  • Why wouldn’t Mycroft tell Sherlock who Redbeard really was when he talked to them in 221B, so that Eurus wouldn’t have the upper hand on Sherlock?
    • She called him ‘Drowned Redbeard’ and they hONESTLY coULDN’T FIGURE THAT OUT
  • Why didn’t Mycroft make them leave the flat IMMEDIATELY after he recognized the grenade the drone was carrying?? WHY DID HE WAIT FOR THE MOTION SENSOR TO ACTIVATE
  • Why the fuck does the skull painting keep changing colours, before it was lit up, now it’s… purple-y?
  • Mycroft says the bomb could affect the café downstairs, because it’s on the floor, but when they come back at the end of the episode the floor is perfectly fine?
  • John, do you want to say goodbye to your daughter who is incapable of even pronouncing a da-da yet, over the phone?
  • Jumping out of a window in the second floor, no wounds WHATSOEVER.
  • How is a fucking Fisherman aware of the Sherrinford Facility (because when he’s talking to the newbie his face says he clearly knows what’s going on in there)
  • If Mycroft can assume full control of the facility (It’s MY office now), why the fUCK DRESS UP AND PLAY PIRATES
    • Yes he said he can’t trust anyone and nobody can know he’s there, then proceeds to step out of the room where he will be seen, so what the frig, my man?
  • Eurus has been in prison, no contacts, no access to anything (there’s NOTHING in her cell, no internet, no books), yet she possesses a vocabulary worthy of someone with a PhD on psychology.
    • How does she even go to the bathroom, she would need to be escorted because there isn’t one in her cell, how was she escorted all these years without recruiting all her guards
  • Why the fuck did she wait until she was an adult to mentally enslave people and start doing whatever she wanted, why now
  • What was that thing about Eurus and Sherlock’s mom’s hairband again?
  • Mycroft has never heard, until now, about the guy who Eurus compelled to kill himself and his family??? The British Government is not aware of that??
  • How exactly is Sherlock’s playing the violin related to the question of how Eurus escaped the facility?
  • There was no glass, “you suspended the signs” THE ONE ON TOP, MAYBE, BUT THE ONE FLOATING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AIR, UNMOVING??? HOW???
  • She wanted to make Sherlock laugh?? So she killed ‘Redbeard’ because she thought that would make him laugh, but that made him scream instead? How does that make sense
  • How did Mycroft not realize the Governor was brainwashed before John did?
    • John: This guy’s brainwashed, let’s go out on the balcony and get some air before Shit Goes Down™
  • Wasn’t Mycroft supposed to be in charge there now? How could the Governor put the entire facility in lockdown AND have EVERYONE doing Eurus’ bidding? Did she have a talk with EVERYBODY THERE?
  • Mycroft, why would you grant Moriarty entrance into Sherrinford and let him have an UNSUPERVISED CONVERSATION with tHE MOST DANGEROUS CRIMINAL MASTERMIND EVER, how was that a good idea and a CONTROLLED RISK
    • And to top it all, why do you have to tell him EVERYTHING ABOUT EURUS BEFORE HE GOES IN, you fucking dumbo, if you don’t tell him anything then she will have to spend most of the time explaining who she is and nOT plotting SHERLOCK’S DEMISE
    • sherloCK, YOUR BROTHER, AND YOU’RE ARRANGING A MEETING BETWEEN THE TWO PEOPLE WHO SEEM TO HAVE THE MOST THINGS AGAINST HIM, THE MOST DANGEROUS PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO HAVE ALREADY EXPRESSED AN INTEREST IN HIM AND MADE ATTEMPTS ON HIS LIFE
  • ‘Your Christmas present is Redbeard’ HE NEVER FUCKING USES THAT KNOWLEDGE ONCE WHILE HE’S ALIVE
  • How the hell is Eurus doing the ‘little girl voice’ thing if it’s HER?? Is she making that voice?
    • How does ‘the little girl’ never hear them talking among themselves when they’re not even lowering their voices
    • If Eurus is so deeply traumatized that she’s hallucinating being the little girl in the plane hOW THE FUCK IS SHE SO CALM AND COLLECTED IN A MATTER OF INSTANTS WHEN SHE SWITCHES TO HER NORMAL VOICE AGAIN
    • How can she mock the little girl’s fears when they are HER fears, HER trauma??
  • ‘This is an experiment’ WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE POINT OF ANY OF THE ‘EXPERIMENTS’ EURUS DID ON THEM
  • So, one of these men has to kill me or my wife will die, there is no other way, gUESS I’LL JUST SHOOT MYSELF
  • Mycroft being squeamish and puking at the sight of a dead body, but he personally infiltrated a Serbian den to save Sherlock from his torturers (SURE HE DIDN’T HAVE TO GET RID OF SOMEONE THEN) in S3 and she walked into a plane full of corpses in S2 like he was strolling through the park???
  • “Where did your plane come from?” “My nan’s”. SHE’S EURUS SHE LIVED ALL HER LIFE AT HER PARENTS’ HOME BEFORE SHE WAS TAKEN AWAY HOW THE FUCK DID THE PLANE LEAVE FROM HER NAN’S
  • “I want to see you interact with people you’re close to”, for no reason whatsoever, apparently
  • “You’ve got a minute to talk to the girl” LET’S WASTE IT DISCUSSING AMONG OURSELVES WHETHER OR NOT SHE SHOULD CRASH THE PLANE
  • “Who loves you?” “Irene Adler?” “Don’t be ridiculous, look at the coffin” ERM EVEN BETTER??? SHE’S??? A?? LESBIAN??? ???????
  • How is Molly not hearing Eurus’ voice if they’re on speaker
  • “I wouldn’t put explosives in Molly’s house, I wouldn’t be that clumsy”??? ??????? ??????????
    • What was the plan if Molly didn’t pick up the phone or time ran out, if you didn’t rig the flat with explosives??
  • Sherlock smashing the coffin?? For no reason?? No knuckle wounds or wounds of any kind afterwards???? Couldn’t expect less from Dr. Strange I guess?
  • “Don’t do as the Governor and kill yourself, because the others are gonna die anyway if you do” “Oh, I’ll just kill myself then!”  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • John “I’m gonna stop Sherlock from killing his brother but not from killing himself” Watson
  • Okay so Eurus met Moriarty on Christmas Day 5 years ago, and according to what the show has hinted at, she wasn’t able to escape the facility then (she could have met up with him on her own if that was the case, but she didn’t ‘cause she was locked up, so that’s why she asked for him). Moriarty kills himself shortly thereafter, and still they somehow managed to orchestrate all of this??? When???
  • Sherlock is not the tiniest bit suspicious that, after hours of holding a call, A) the girl’s phone still has battery, and B) she hasn’t tried to call someone else in the meantime???
  • John, a doCTOR, CAN’T TELL DOG BONES FROM CHILD BONES???
  • “Moriarty wanted to make trouble when he was dead”, by providing clock and train sound effects, apparently
  • So Redbeard was a kid, that WENT MISSING, who THE FUCK DOESN’T IMMEDIATELY DEPLOY A SEARCH PARTY AND SEARCH ALL BODIES OF WATER IN THE AREA
  • Sherlock doesn’t know his dad is allergic to dogs?? His parents never bring up the fact that he seemed to be convinced they had one?? And that he had totally forgotten about his sister???? Like, ever???? #Parentsoftheyear
  • Victor Trevor was a kid who liked to play pirates and, according to canon, drink from a dog bowl with the name of his favourite pirate engraved in it
  • I haven’t asked my brother to join his pirate game like, once, but I’m jealous so imma kill his best friend and he’s gonna forgive me and hug the psycho away from me
    • How the FUCK did 6yo Eurus LOWER A KID HER SIZE DOWN A FREAKING WELL WITHOUT THROWING HIM IN AND KILLING HIM INSTANTLY (and he is shown alive down there, so, HOW??)
    • Sherlock remembers Victor and he’s still calling him Redbeard in his memory, what kind of fuckery, nobody uses your pirate-game name when things get that fucking serious
  • Fuck the girl on the plane and John in the well, I need to hug brunette Harley Quinn
  • She’s been on the air her whole life, why is the plane crashing now
  • If she really fucking wanted to be helped WHY WOULD SHE MAKE IT SO GODDAMN DIFFICULT WITH THE SONG AND THE GRAVES AND THE NUMBER AND THE SEQUENCES CHILL DOWN MAYBE SATAN
  • “You went wrong the last time” UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE CENTURY
  • John Watson? Drowning? What is a Drowning?
  • Here, have a rope, now your feet are Magically Unchained
  • “I couldn’t tell you what your daughter had become” WTF THEY FUCKING KNEW SHE MADE A KID DISAPPEAR AND BURNED THE HOUSE DOWN
  • “She’s secure this time” well I hope you replaced the entirety of the staff working at Sherrinford
  • “Sherlock, you were always the grown-up”
    • Sherlock, who has been addressed as and called himself a Giant Baby Several Times
  • Back to Baker Street, where the floor is intact, the windows look like they exploded from the outside and not from the inside and the bookshelves, books and buffalo skull are safe
  • Whoa, that was incredibly convenient of Mary’s second posthumous DVD to arrive right at the end of the MCFREAKING CASE
  • “I know What You Two Can Become, because I know Who You Are, but also who you are dOESN’T MATTER
    • ?????
    • ???????????
    • ??????????????????????????


And people wonder why everybody thought the leak was a fake. Somebody turn off the lights and close the door, we’re done here. @malinwolf

Movie review: ‘Justice League’ is the cinematic equivalent of eating at Buffalo Wild Wings.

Photo courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures 

Catching a game of sports with the bros can be tricky. There’s always the one guy who wants to go to Buffalo Wild Wings. 

That chain restaurant is a mountain of mediocrity — from its sensory overloaded walls of flat-screen TVs to its eight-page menu full of wings, sauces for wings, and drinks made from the same radioactive sludge to make those sauces and wings. 

But you’re going out with the dudes. You hype yourself up, and say, “It won’t be, no it can’t be, as bad as last time.” Hell, this visit to bee-dub-dubs might even be surprisingly good. 

Two hours later, you have a headache from the MSG, caffeine and noise you ingested. You go home and run to the bathroom. You promise yourself you’ll never visit a Buffalo Wild Wings again. Ever. Not for watching sports. Not for your friends. Not if it were the only restaurant in your godforsaken dump of a town. 

“For the love of all things holy and good in the fucking planet,” you say to yourself while taking your third shit in three hours. “I’m never going back to Buffalo Wild Wings.”

This entire scene encapsulates what it’s like to see Justice League. The new DC Comics superhero ensemble is to cinema as Buffalo Wild Wings is to restaurants. Just as each bite of your stack of wings gets colder and more gross, Justice League becomes more embarrassingly awful with each scene.

The movie throws together two styles from two directors — the fascinatingly/embarrassingly dark/sometimes inspired Zack Synder and the snarky/“mother of God someone get this man a cinematographer”/sloppy zest of Joss Whedon. You know exactly what was reshot — if not for the lighting, it’s the forced jokes/attempts at chemistry. Then, there’s the CGI on Henry Cavill’s face. 

Goo. 

Neither Snyder nor Whedon’s take on these heroes works because there is so little to care about. Outside of Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman and Cavill as Superman, the rest of the team is hardly committed to the roles. 

Affleck looked more comfortable in Surviving Christmas than he does playing Batman. 

Ezra Miller’s The Flash is a kid who says things like “racial tension” after trying to be friendly with a black dude. He runs like a dolphin. 

Originally posted by thefamemonxter

Why so much arm flapping?

Also, look at how the movie shows The Flash is fast — excessive lightning bolts and electricity. It’s like the producers saw the last two X-Men movies and said, “Fuck, we’re not going to beat those Quicksilver scenes, just throw a bunch of lightning in post-production, would ya?” (I get it, his character is as fast as lightning, but Jesus, this is the laziest way of showing it.) 

Ray Fisher is Cyborg. He says, “Booyah.” 

Originally posted by fygeneralzod

Jason Mamoa is Aquaman. He guzzles whiskey and says, “My man!”

Originally posted by youngjusticer

Steppenwolf is the villain, and he looks like an extra from Warcraft

Originally posted by svfrrs

The world is going to die if these boxes connect, so these heroes join forces, dig up Superman’s grave and vow to save the planet from destruction. Along the way, there’s J.K. Simmons, Amy Adams, Diane Lane, Holt McNally and Joe Morton getting paid for doing nothing.  

Justice League, like Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, is a mess. Unlike that latter movie, Justice League isn’t a cohesive, sometimes fascinating failure — it’s just a failure. There’s no care for the script or these characters, it’s just rushing to catch up with Marvel’s movie universe. In rushing that, you’re rushing the reason why people care about Marvel’s movies — character development. All the Marvel movies are formulaic and big, goofy, dumb apes of escapist entertainment, but it’s preposterous that I now care more about Ant-Man than I do Batman. 

When Justice League was over, I had sensory overload. I was depressed. I wasted two hours of my life. Like when I visited Buffalo Wild Wings to watch that game, I hoped it would be good, then I realized it was just as I expected — garbage, empty calories, a big wad of nothing. 

Even more depressing is some people actually clapped at the end of Justice League. They deserve a special place in hell, next to the people who force you to go to Buffalo Wild Wings. 

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“Civilization was this impossible blend of novelty and regret.  And it was doubtless for this reason, and for no other, that Buffalo Bill Cody – who had inaugurated the new form that was mass entertainment – disappeared in turn into its grand oblivion.” – Eric Vuillard, from his book Sorrow of the Earth: Buffalo Bill, Sitting Bull and the Tragedy of Show Business.  It’s newly translated from the French and published in the US by Pushkin Press.  A very different perspective on the same story mentioned in our last post.

The world is a magic book, and we its sentences.
We read it and read ourselves.
                                                   We close it and turn the page down
And never come back,
Returned to what we once were before we became what we are.
This is the tale the world tells, this is the way it ends.

Charles Wright, from “Buffalo Yoga” in Buffalo Yoga: Poems (Farrar, Straus, and Giroux, 2004)