bruhman

IF MARTIN HAD BEEN SET IN 2015:

1. Pam joins Hotep Twitter; Martin calls her “Erykah Badon’t.”

2. Stan convinces everybody to buy his pre-paid legal services, then runs off on a trip to the Caribbean with their money.

3. Martin, Tommy, and Cole try to make it a week without sex after fearing that “The Thirst” is making them all soft.

4. Martin and Gina break up after fighting over whether or not a good date should cost $200; Pam shows up and calls Martin “Ba-roke Obama.”

5. Cole and Tommy convince Martin that ass eating is for punks; Martin refuses and soon thinks Gina is cheating with Bruhman because “ya’ll know he eats anything, man!”

6. Martin, Tommy, and Cole drive to Philadelphia to fight someone for saying that Lebron James couldn’t ball on Twitter.

7. Pam tries to become internet famous by putting clips of her singing on YouTube; Martin calls her “Weaveyonce.”

8. Martin and Bruhman try selling T-shirts at a #BlackLivesMatter rally, but the shirts say #BackLifsMader. They get run out by an angry mob.

9. Cole launches a GoFundMe campaign for his newest business venture, #RentEmTweets.

10. Rev. Leon Lonnie Love tries to become a Twitter life coach; Gina and Pam expose him as a fraud during a tweet-up.

11. Mama Payne gets a new bird and teaches it to call Gina a “thot.”


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